130

Corner
Posted on September 11, 2019 by David M Willis

130 thoughts on “Corner”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    Speak of the hotness and he will come

    1. LeslieBean4shizzle

      **raises hand**

    2. Needfuldoer

      Phrasing.

  2. Versen

    Smoke bomb like, 2 minutes ago.

    1. Cholma

      Seriously! Either that, or a cardboard box suddenly drops over Metal Gear Joyce, and no one notices it walking away.

      1. Shane Wegner

        !

  3. bearfuz

    Doh dohh = dun dunnnn

    1. LeslieBean4shizzle

      My thoughts exactly.

      1. Stephen Bierce

        I had flashbacks to the Warner Brothers cartoons with Porky Pig versus the Dodo.

        1. woobie

          I thought “Uh-ohhh”.

        2. Sambo

          Same; it reminds me of the Uh-Oh baby from Cul-De-Sac

      2. Arawn

        The baby is hip to the brewing poopstorm… and I don’t mean in the diapers.

    2. jeffepp

      The child is wise beyond it’s years.

    3. Zaxares

      I suppose “doh doh doooohhhh!” would have been a bit too on the nose. XD

    4. Deanatay

      Jaime has already developed advanced drama detection abilities at such an early age!

      It will serve him well, later in life.

    5. Felian

      exactly.

      This will go greeeaaat. uh-oh.

  4. Nono

    Aww. I’m filing Harrison tentatively in the ‘good family members’ pile.

    1. ValdVin

      Me too. Nice to have a successful older brother (first born?) who is also a pleasant and supportive sibling.

      1. ValdVin

        “If Jacob chose you, you must be great” is more evidence.

    2. Doctor_Who

      I’m tempted, but I refuse to be tricked. He needs a bit more time to convince me he doesn’t have something terrible.

      Also, I need to see him take the baby off his chest at least once before I’ll be fully convinced he’s not just a robot being controlled Krang-like by Jaime.

    3. Keulen

      He seems like a pretty good guy so far. Though I wonder how he’ll react when he finds out Joyce was lying about being Jacob’s girlfriend.

      1. guavajagular

        I honestly don’t even know how I would react

        1. Clif

          Same.

      2. Sunny

        Maybe he won’t.
        Jacob will just act like he usually does with Joyce, and Harrison will be convinced they’re totally a couple.

        1. thejeff

          And then some wacky circumstance will keep Raidah from showing up for lunch (dinner?) like they’d planned and Jacob won’t mention it and Joyce will just go along instead and …

          Nah, it just doesn’t make sense

  5. Tacos

    The baby knows what’s up. “Doh Dohh” indeed.

    1. Madock345

      That baby will be a great Bard, drama senses like those so young.

    2. Lingo

      Is he calling Joyce a dodo? Or is he simply channeling Homer Simpson? The world may never know.

  6. Newllend(henryvolt)

    Balls in your court Joyce.

    1. LeslieBean4shizzle

      **giggles**

      (yes, I am being completely immature)

    2. Agemegos

      Nope, not the way things are going.

    3. Needfuldoer

      Phrasing!

  7. King Daniel

    Who is this mysterious “Mind Y” that’s listed in the tags? Are they a new character?

    1. GoblinScribe

      They’re Mindy’s psychic twin.

  8. Danielle

    this whole situation went totally babies

    1. Diner Kinetic

      *written upvote* It’s gonna be interesting seeing joyce play this off as her normal joyce weirdness and or catastrophically doubling down

    2. thejeff

      Not yet so babies that it’s babies McIntyre though

  9. BBCC

    Damn, Joyce, I think being called out by a frigging baby is a new low. 😛

    1. Doctor_Who

      Even babies find sitcom shenanigans like this predictable and cliche.

      1. BBCC

        True enough. Baby Jaime is growing up with TASTE. XD

      2. Needfuldoer

        So is he reacting to the shenanigans, or providing the music cue?

    2. Reltzik

      Lower than being the Whiteboard Dingdong Bandit?

      1. BBCC

        Infinitely, yes. 😛

  10. not someone else

    Well, Harrison is apparently fucking adorable and a genuinely spectacular human being, which I appreciate, because it’s really helping me keep reading over how much I want to scream and gesticulate at Joyce right now over her life choices.

    1. GoblinScribe

      I’m glad this is probably getting nipped in the bud quick. It might still be salvageable. I have no idea what her plan was, though, literally. Did she think Harrison… wouldn’t mention her to Jacob?

      1. not someone else

        I don’t feel like describing this as a plan is likely to be accurate.

        1. Reltzik

          Or to describe any part of her involvement with it as thinking.

        2. Proxiehunter

          What is the female equivalent of thinking with your little head?

        3. not someone else

          There’s effectively the same thing, it’s just littler.

        4. Proxiehunter

          Yeah but no one calls that a head. Is it letting the little man in a boat think for you?

        5. Geneseepaws

          Women can be Sea Captains too. Could be a woman piloting the little boat.

      2. Tan

        Well, you see, if she presents herself to Harrison as Jacob’s girlfriend, and Harrison approves of her in that light, then that will make Jacob think about if she -was- his girlfriend, and then obviously realize that was what was meant to be all along and make her his girlfriend and marry her and have 3.5 kids that she can raise in a non-hippie church that isn’t full of buttfaces and have her Welch’s grape juice communion and live happily ever after, next door to Becky and Dina and their pack of historically accurate mecha-velociraptors. And President Dorothy occasionally lets her borrow a cool fighterjet to fly the kids to their field trips.

        It’s pretty airtight, honestly.

  11. Reltzik

    Nothing can possibly go wrong in this exchange, and I fully endorse it.

  12. NerdHerder

    Today, we are all the cringe.

  13. BiOnyx

    “Doh Dohh”.
    That’s either baby talk for “DUN-DUN-DUUUUHHHHN!”
    Or, Dragnet’s “Daaahn da-dah-dahnt”!

  14. pjeseb

    The hour of judgement is nigh.

    Will Joyce confess, or sink ever deeper into the lie?

    1. Reltzik

      I’m guessing she’ll gaslight. “What? No, I didn’t say that… you must have gotten confused.”

      That’ll work on a lawyer. Honest!

  15. Axel

    at least it’s happening fast

    1. Bagge

      Joyce never does anything in moderation.

  16. Mr. Random

    I just realized this entire concept is a callback to when Joyce coerced Danny into being her make-believe boyfriend for her parents back in Roomies!

    1. Agemegos

      Also, Amber and Danny at Parents’ Day.

      Do people actually do this sort of thing?

      1. DinaJoyce

        Fake significant others? That’s totally a thing. Usually it’s considered polite to your friend to ask permission to use them as a fake significant other FIRST though (and give them the genuine opportunity to say no). I would say fake boyfriends are used most often to scare off creepers or to “gently” let down a guy who is interested in a woman who doesn’t reciprocate (in an emergency, the creepers thing is the one time when you’re allowed to coerce a friend into being a fake boyfriend without prior discussion, but if possible, even then prior discussion is preferred). Fake significant others to impress parents is pretty common too. It’s a pretty standard romcom trope.
        (disclaimer: I don’t know how people who aren’t straight, cis, women generally approach the fake boyfriend to scare off interested parties thing. I can speak only from my own experience where lots of straight cis women used this method).

        1. Lensipensi

          Like you said, it is definitely a thing. I read an article on it a year ago where it is stated that it is sadly more common for the interested party to accept a “No” because the woman is taken and not because the woman is not interested. Like: alright she is property of this other man, because of this I can’t have her.

        2. thejeff

          Even without the “property” aspect, it can be an easier rejection. “I might be interested, but I’m already in a relationship” makes it not about them personally.

        3. Felian

          For non-straight folks who are still in the closet (and other reasons), there’s the .

          Sometimes, as a non-monogamous person, all that’s left is “no means no“ when “i have a girlfriend“ does not constitute a reason to not reciprocate someone’s feelings…! (a weird concept IMO, anyway. I get to be not interested in someone regardless of my relationship status. It’s toxic culture that makes beards / fake SOs a need. (judging the system here, not the people who use these concepts within that system!)

        4. Felian

          beard is what i meant. bad coding!!

      2. thejeff

        The Amber/Danny version was a special case, since they were sort of dating, in a sense. The Amber/AG division was less solid back then. Danny didn’t know it, so it still wasn’t fair to him, but at least there wasn’t a third party or attempt to break them up involved.
        And Amber had the extra motivation of running from Blaine involved.

  17. Wraithy2773

    ………….I’m disappointed in you, Willis.

    This comic is just an awful disgrace.

    The baby should be going “Doh doh dohhhhhh!” 😀

  18. Pocky

  19. Keulen

    I’m assuming the baby is trying to make the “dun dun DUNNN” sound effect.

    1. Lawzlo

      That’s a good link, although I was kinda expecting: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a1Y73sPHKxw

      1. Needfuldoer

        “UH-Oooooohhhhhhh”

        (Skip to 53 seconds in if the link doesn’t do it for you.)

    2. BBCC

      I thought he was calling her a dodo. XD

  20. abysswatcher1993

    This is going to be so awkward that Mike will appear to collect Joyce’s tears.

    1. Geneseepaws

      If joyce cries, Mike will actually collect her tears. And use them on his pancakes for sweet, sweet syrup.

      1. Bathymetheus

        In my experience, tears are salty.

        Maybe I have an abnormal metabolism?

        1. Kat

          it’s not the actual tears. But if you are evil enough, you break through to a new level where you can taste the actual sorrow of others, and that is the sweetest of all tastes.

          I know this from…research…

  21. Nenja

    Well I’m not looking forward to the next comic, but at least it will be over quick. I hope.

  22. Bagge

    Radiah: Your brother will be disappointed if you don’t do everything perfectly.
    Joyce: Your brother believes in you no matter what.

    Dang, Joyce gives Jacob a hug straight in the insecurities. This will do exactly nothing to make things less messy

  23. Jaime

    (I accidentally included my last name on my previous comment, and I hope a moderator will delete it as I seldom use my whole name on the internet for Reasons That Should Be Obvious.)

    I am so embarrassed for Joyce right now. She had a chance to do the “Haha, just kidding!” thing. Then she had a chance to come clean and tell Harrison something along the lines of, “I really like your brother and WISH I was his girlfriend, which is why I pretended to be and I’m sorry.” Now…this can’t end well.
    I also feel kind of uncomfortable about Joyce, as a white Christian woman, actively trying to supplant and replace Raidah, a Muslim woman of colour. The problematic aspects of this have been pointed out in the comments before, notably when Joyce was openly flirting with Jacob in front of Raidah. (Someone who has a better memory than I do/is better at searching the archives than I am can probably find the relevant storyline.)

    1. TheWanderingMist

      What’s Joyce being white or Christian got to do with anything about this? Besides the no adultery thing obviously. She was trying to set Sarah up with Jacob for the longest time. The only reason she’s doing this now is because of the whole thing with Joe’s list and him warning her about Sarah’s plans to use her. Consider a situation where Jacob and Joyce were genuinely together and Raidah was trying to break them up. Would you call that uncomfortable? I doubt it.

      1. BBCC

        Christians and white people have a long history of trying to supplant people of colour and Muslims when they have something they want.

        1. thejeff

          To be fair, Muslims have a long history of doing the same. 🙂

          Just not particularly in America or at the present time. It’s more a matter of power and opportunity than anything else. It’s what all of us clever apes do.

          It’s hard to say whether that really plays much into the Joyce/Jacob/Raidah dynamic. Honestly there’s enough to criticize about Joyce’s role without any of that. And reasons to criticize Raidah too, though less blatantly. Jacob mostly get nailed for being obliviously flirty. Unless he actually is aware, in which case, he’s a big jerk too.

        2. BBCC

          The story takes place in America though, which is why it’s relevant.

          I think it’s less a factor in why Joyce is doing it and why it’s a factor in why some of the commentariot finds it uncomfortable.

        3. thejeff

          True.
          Personally, I find it plenty uncomfortable even without that.

        4. TheWanderingMist

          I don’t think Jacob has any clue how he comes across. I can definitely relate to the “having no idea you were flirting” thing.

  24. RacingTurtle

    oh, joyce

  25. JessWitt

    Duh-oh.

    Wonder how long until Harrison brings up Joyce as his brother’s girlfriend. And will Jacob go along with the charade, for whatever reason?

  26. Well_Played

    You said it kid

  27. Woomy

    What now, Joyce? WHAT NOW?

    1. Shane Wegner

      Smile and play it off, talk all friendly, banter and flirt, do everything except say “YOU ARE MY BOYFRIEND”. The long and more natural that goes on, the more it will be “She’s not? Why not?”

      Great story to tell the grandkids later.

      1. BenRG

        Actually, I think that’s an in-character valid strategy: Glomp Jacob whilst yelling “Boyfriend!” at the top of her voice and pray that Jacob gets the drift and plays along.

        1. thejeff

          Works fine until they meet up with Raidah for lunch.

          Assuming that Jacob would play along, which she’s got no reason to expect.

        2. BenRG

          Panic and common sense rarely inhabit the same brain.

        3. JBento

          It would also make Jacob an extremely shitty person.

        4. Shane Wegner

          I suppose there’s an extremely small chance Jacob has an unknown newer-than-Raidah girlfriend after deciding it wasn’t working out, but that’s a long stretch.

  28. Jay

    This is either going to go terribly or amazingly.

    1. SillyGoose

      Why not both?

  29. BenRG

    There is the key difference between Joyce and Raidah when it comes to Jacob. To Raidah, Harrison is a stick with which to beat her boyfriend and drive him to excel. To Joyce, it’s something unpleasant for someone to be living to mimic someone else. I do think we’re heading towards Harrison telling Jacob: “I like that Joyce kid more than your real girlfriend!

    Meanwhile, Jaime’s commentary in panel 5 suggests that he’s definitely the smartest person in the room.

  30. TrueVCU

    That baby got the Weirding Way

  31. Lumpy Frogsnuggler

    Did…did that baby just make the Law & Order noise?

    1. TemperaryObsessor

      I thought he said doa. Which in the the Simpsons means something between I screwed up and something bad just happened to me.

  32. Arianod

    Baby speaks for all of us.

  33. TemperaryObsessor

    I’m going to guess Jacob’s brother is cool. I mean he could just not know to tell his brother what he told Joyce in a way his brother believes him. Or Jacob’s issues could come from their parents or the world at large or even just himself.
    I’m pretty sure comparing yourself to others in your circle is part of how we are wired, and thinking I’m not good enough for this person because by the metric you started using they are a ten and you are a five is a trap you can fall into.

  34. Acebender

    Oh boy

    1. BenRG

      Now we’re going to see just what Jacob’s view of all this actually is.

      1. TheWanderingMist

        Jacob: Well, Raidah just dumped me, so I guess she is now.

  35. BenRG

    Here’s a possibility: Harrison has been aware of Jacob’s presence for a while. Being a romantic, he’s been encouraging Joyce to talk up Jacob, hoping that it will impress her ‘boyfriend’. I wonder if it has done so?

  36. showler

    That baby is going to win the bonus strip poll next month, aren’t they?

  37. Rabisch

    Time for Joyce to use her teleport power. Or to win the awkwardness of a huge liar. If Jakob is with Malaya now all will be even funnier!

  38. WeirderThanWeird

    And at this point, I will stop reading DoA for a while so that I can skip this arc. The awkwardness is too much for me to handle

    1. Clif

      I’m going to assume that you’ve never had to deal with any actually awkward situations.

      1. Inahc

        Where is rhar assumption coming from? O.o

        Me, I find fictional awkwardness cringey and hard to stand; RL awkwardness tends to make me freeze up, hard. So I suppose technically I *don’t* deal with it even when I do encounter it. :/

  39. Vangeln

    Yes, you’re disappointing, Joyce.

    1. JBento

      It’s your fault for having expectations.

  40. Fuchs Sakemann

    Oof. Well, at least it’s better than Raidah coming over. Still, it’s gonna be tough to talk your way out of this one, Joyce.

    1. Tan

      Please note that there is still room to pan over.

  41. Orange Lantern

    Now would be a perfect time to be struck down by lightning. Where is god when you need him, eh?

  42. Drusatis

    It seems like folks forget Jacob is a grown, yet somewhat inexperienced, man. Like all his affections for Joyce seems to be accidental. Sorry but whether you’re aware of it or not, once you start to gravitate towards someone, you are just as responsible for your own actions. Maybe he’s not aware of his feelings for Joyce, but we know that Raidah has been using Jacob’s respect and admiration for his brother to some end in their relationship. When you start to feel the pull from another, you should probably be looking for the problem in your current relationship. The baby knows it and probably senses a change for those two in the future. Just saying, Joyce seems to make Jacob very happy,and Jacob seems to make Joyce very happy. Better that than being used by Raidah for her personal benefit.

    1. Schpoonman

      I don’t think anyone disagrees with that assessment, but the point is being forthright and honest with your intentions. While Joyce and Jacob may be a good fit for each other, right now Joyce is being worse than Raidah by not just telling Jacob she likes him and offering herself as an alternative to Raidah.

  43. SillyGoose

    Joyce: -Oh Jacob, good to see you. Where’s Raidah?
    Harrisson: Who’s Raidah?
    Joyce: -Jacob’s girlfriend.
    Harrisson: -…?
    Joyce: -Yay I know, at first I didn’t realize you meant girlfriend girlfriend, and when I did I didn’t clarify, cause I thought it was funny, cause I’m like 5. But she’s the girlfriend.
    Jaime: -‘ood save!

    And all is well.

    1. BenRG

      Jacob: “So, anyone ordered pizza?”

    2. Clif

      Yeah, you or I could do an instant save in any of four or five ways. That doesn’t mean Joyce can.

      1. SillyGoose

        Fair enough. Let’s get popcorn then.

  44. ǝ snow ʍousɐ

    D’OH!

  45. Sol Karas

    I am cringing so hard I’m going to become a black hole and consume the whole of the earth into the cringe.

  46. DarkoNeko

    Even the baby is all “uh ooh”

  47. Vulcanodon

    Joyce looks up and smiles serenely; “I told him I was your girlfriend!” then breaks into giggles. All tension is defused.

    (As if Joyce could pull that off)

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