202

Aaron
Posted on December 13, 2013 by David M Willis

202 thoughts on “Aaron”

  1. Jen Aside

    well, she tried

    1. GoldStarz

      Sarah is fired from her own PR department. Someone else bolster up Sarah’s rep!

  2. Mr. Random

    RUN, spread you’re soday goodness elsewhere!

  3. ShaggyDonahugh

    Nothin cuter than scaring small children away from your bubble. Right grumpy grandpa in a rocker?
    GET OFF MY PROPERTY!
    AAH!

    1. Frostbite

      Great now Old man Sarah has our last ball.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Riley = Dennis, Sarah = Mr. Wilson.

        1. Keroshino

          Get outta Here! …GET OUTTA HERE!!!

        2. ninja_jesus

          *beatboxes*

  4. Ourorboros

    Comic failure ahead.
    Sarah, for your sake skip to step 2.

    1. Aizat

      Kidnap Jacob and tie him up in the basement?

      1. Ourorboros

        Thirteenth Amendment be damned.

        1. Aizat

          Well, if Sarah is willing to do that…

      2. Curacaobill

        Kinky

        1. Aizat

          Not as kinky as herding cattle through the Vatican.

        2. Ourorboros

          Do cows poop in the Vatican?

        3. Aizat

          Yes, Ouroboros. Cows poop in the Vatican. I just don’t know if they call it Holy Shit or just regular shit.

        4. JA

          Only the pope can produce Holy Shit.

          What? Popes poop just like we do, even the ones we like.

        5. The Chosen One

          But does the Pope shit in the woods?

        6. Aizat

          Can we get an internet up in here? JA just won one.

    2. Wack'd

      No, skip to step three.

      Profit.

  5. Aizat

    What did Riley ever to you, Sarah?

    1. timemonkey

      She ate all the cereal and now there’s none left for Sarah.

    2. Yotomoe

      She reminded Sarah what youth was like!

    3. Jenny Creed

      She thought Sarah was a giant cocoa puff.

    4. saltchocolate

      I know 12-year-olds. Riley did SOMETHING. We just don’t know what!

      1. NIghtsbridge

        Sure we know. She’s Roz’s sister.

  6. Doctor_Who

    Wow, turn your back for five seconds and she goes straight to “Get off my lawn” mode.

    Joyce just can’t take her anywhere.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Time to return her to her nursing home then. 😛

      1. Yotomoe

        I PAY MY TAXES!!! YOU CAN’T DO THIS TO ME!

  7. TobyMobias

    Pop MachineXSarah is now my favorite ship. I expect at least three fanfics on my desk by Sunday. Get on it, Internet.

    1. timemonkey

      She’s going to spray it all over her body.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Not many guys have the potential to spray a GF with so many different flavours of sticky fluid. 😀

        1. Mr K

          I won’t be surprised if there is some porn like that. It’s probably from either Germany or Japan.

        2. ninja_jesus

          No, Germany does the beer version.

  8. Plasma Mongoose

    “Kids these days…”

    1. Aizat

      Yeah, back then, kids could pilot giant robots without going all angst and crap.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        …and they could control said giant robot with a wrist watch.

        1. Aizat

          Or hell, pilot the giant robot with a motorcycle…that docks with an aircraft which then docks with the robot’s head.

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          For some reason I thought about the Science Ninja’s plane at first but then I remembered that it never turned into a robot.

        3. Aizat

          It’s from Mazinger Z.

        4. Plasma Mongoose

          AH!

        5. Aizat

          Or pilot the robot using three spacecraft that could combine into one robot. Good times.

        6. Keroshino

          Ok, that reference eludes me!

        7. Aizat

          First reference is Mazinger Z. The second one is Getter Robo. And Plas is either referencing Giant Robo or Tetsujin 28.

        8. Keroshino

          The motorcycle one?

        9. Aizat

          Mazinger Z…I think.

        10. Keroshino

          WTF? This was supposed to be a response to Aizat!

        11. Keroshino

          Which upon re-inspection, turns out it was correct…
          …i am an idiot!!! 😛

    2. Yotomoe

      Back in my day, kids just played pokemon on their gameboys. Now it’s all wrong. Stupid kids…playing pokemon on their 3DS’.

  9. Ryugen

    Pop machine… more like STOP machine. Hahahaha.

  10. Tom Speelman

    Poor Riley. Also, I’m very glad you say “pop,” Willis. It makes me feel whole.

    1. Thanks, I'll Have Another!

      Great Lakes jargon checks out.

    2. SplashBoogie

      My inner Texan cringes. I know it’s accurate for the location but…still…

      1. Tacdud2

        wait we dont say pop?

      2. Mo

        Relax and have a coke.

    3. Doctor_Who

      I am from Ohio. We say pop here.

      I’ve personally lived elsewhere, so I sometimes use soda as well. It offends my brother, he always tells me it’s pop.

      1. Keroshino

        I’m from Alberta, and we say pop!

        1. Batman

          Around here it’s called…

          …BatCola.

        2. N0083rP00F

          Pretty much all of Canada except Quebec since they are “special” =P

          In Germany its Limonade even though it has nothing to do with lemons.

        3. Kryss LaBryn

          Spent most of my life in BC; lived briefly in Ontario; now I’m in Nova Scotia. Pretty sure all of Canada calls it pop.

          Always thought “soda” was some weird American thing until I found out it’s a regional weird American thing. 😉 Some of them call it “pop” too. But I think it’s Canada-wide up here.

        4. Roborat

          Yup.

        5. Kelly

          Montana too

      2. isitsevenyet

        I grew up in California and have always said “soda”. But I’m not sure whether that’s a California thing or because my grandmother called it that. She grew up in Maryland so who knows?

    4. Yotomoe

      I don’t know what a pop machine is. Is it a machine that pops you in the mouth if you put in some money? That sounds awful!

      1. Tom Speelman

        It pops your mouth full of delicious liquid!!

    5. ninja_jesus

      Hawaii says “soda”. Or “juice”, not as a replacement for the word “soda/pop/coke” but because there’s really good canned juice here. 😀

    6. sps48

      Live on a US military (or be in it) and you get a good melting pot of the Melting Pot. People call it all of the above, and the nubs will say “You call it what? Where are YOU from?”

  11. Opus the Poet

    Cue inappropriate kid statement from Sarah.

  12. Phil

    …the hell? Shouting at a 12-year-old for no apparent reason; stay classy, Sarah.

    1. Phil

      Aaaaand a Jacob gravatar saying it. YES

    2. Allcool-dontcare

      I dont always scare children but when I do IM F#CKING TIRED

  13. newllend

    Wally shows up: why the hell you talking too the pop machine

    1. newllend

      WALKY, FUCK YOU AUTO CORRECT

      1. Aizat

        Yeah, I was going to ask. How did Wally West got lost here? Or is it Wallaby Beetle?

      2. davidbreslin101

        And suddenly I understand why a bunch of people here were talking about Wally the other day.

  14. Keroshino

    HOLY SHIT SARAH!!!

    WTF did Riley ever do to you?

    1. Aizat

      Give her Cocoa Puffs?

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Silly Riley, everybody knows that at Sarah’s stage of life, only cereal with loads of bran count as a breakfast. 😛

        1. Aizat

          You mean like Bran Flakes? Well, they do have a nice cereal box.

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          Mmmm cereal box….

        3. Doctor_Who

          So Sarah suffers from constipation and needs a lot of bran? That might explain her attitude a bit.

        4. Plasma Mongoose

          It’s hard to deal with other people’s shit when you cannot even do any of your own.

        5. NIghtsbridge

          Who is Riley’s sister, again, that caused and continues to cause Sarah some serious emotional trauma?

      2. Leorale

        Name her future son after the cocoa puffs mascot?

        1. Leorale

          –aw dang that was meant to be a response to “what did Riley ever do to you”.

    2. Roborat

      Probably ate all the fruit loops.

  15. Alex Stritar

    It’s hard not to love Joyce, isn’t it?

    1. begbert2

      I dunno, that ‘Aaron/Moses’ quip reminded me of all the times she’s made me want to smack her with a xenophilia stick. So the cutes turned to cringes.

      1. Charles Phipps

        I admit, that line made me think, “you want to make graven images while Sarah is away writing the ten commandments?”

  16. Wonder Wig

    “Agg! YOUTH and INNOCENCE! It burrns…”

    1. Aizat

      It burns us! It burns us!

  17. newllend

    Is anybody going to bite my head off if I say I find Sarah to be a turn off

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      But how can you bite the head off a creature that is nothing but head?

      1. newllend

        First day with this avatar and people are already questioning it

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          Isn’t that the point of using your own ava?

        2. newllend

          …Got me there

    2. Joel Rice

      No, as long as You don’t bite my head off for finding her uber hawt.

  18. Plasma Mongoose

    And the Sarah/Pop Machine ship will remain unlaunched…

  19. JoeMerl

    I now choose to imagine that Joyce is voiced by Jeff Goldblum.

    1. Aizat

      Oh just have Joyce’s line full of “Uh” and “Umm” and have her whisper some of the lines.

  20. Doctor_Who

    Don’t ask me why I did this, I just did.

    1. LiaHansen

      Ohmygod

    2. Aizat

      Stupid Riley! You made me look bad!

    3. Plasma Mongoose

      You forgot your meds, didntja Doc?

    4. Curacaobill

      ……………… This…. Yes.

    5. Kernanator

      Doctor, you have no idea how happy this reference makes me.

    6. Narf

      HAH! Oh man, that wins so hard.

  21. T Campbell

    Hey, you just dropped a race-blind Bible reference there, Joyce! Because Aaron and Moses were related, and probably dark-skinned. Good show!

    1. Wack'd

      Aaron is my favorite Bible reference.

      1. Leorale

        Aaron is the ultimate wingman.

      2. The Candyman

        Aaron is best prophet.

    2. Ourorboros

      Fundamentalists have all the characters as Caucasian. Or does blonde white Jesus with the square jaw look particularly Semetic to you?
      Hollywood didn’t start white washing, they just make more money doing it.

    3. sps48

      Love P&A, T!
      And I picture Aaron looking something like Gene Simmons. Moses is Charlton Heston, can’t help it.

  22. Philippe G.

    Maybe Pop machine is into bossy women.
    In any case, I shit it now.

    1. Doctor_Who

      Sounds painful.

    2. Aizat

      Or maybe Pops is from Lolliland and prefer that scrumptious looking Cherry Lolli there.

      1. Wack'd

        Good show!

        1. Aizat

          Jolly good show!

    3. Philippe G.

      I swear I wrote “ship”, but my autocorrect has a weird sense of humor.

  23. Mr K

    Poor Riley. Seriously, if Sarah continues this she’ll lose some places on the popularity poll.

    1. Keroshino

      For me, She is officially worse than Danny!!!

      You “DO NOT” be mean to Riley!

      1. Just Cheeto Dust

        Let’s not say things we can’t take back.

        1. Keroshino

          Ok…Danny is still worse!
          It’s just that Sarah keeps doing stuff that makes me dislike her, and snapping at people (especially Riley) isn’t helping!

          Seriously…that behaviour is not cool!

  24. Shanunu

    I just realized that between Joyce, Sarah, and Jacob, the one one whose name isn’t actually IN the Bible is Joyce, the one who isn’t included in the whole “used for a body” business.

  25. Varangian

    To be fair, Moses was pretty grumpy himself, so she’s just being accurate to your example, Joyce dear.

    1. The Candyman

      The Bible is full of grumpy people. God included.

  26. Sammie1053

    It takes a truly bitter soul to get mad at RILEY DESANTO, the most adorable 12 year old younger sister in this comic.

    1. Aizat

      And not sickeningly cute like those moe characters.

    2. begbert2

      She’s definitely way better than all the other 12 year old younger sisters in the comic!

  27. Yotomoe

    I swear I never hear people call it pop. Like…never. I thought they were a myth until recently.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      I heard it been called pop in older shows and comics, but I never heard a person call it that.

      1. Boom

        Well, pop my bop-she-wop-dop-fop.

    2. bustagus

      I’ve heard people in Michigan and Minnesota call it pop. I think it’s a far north thing.

      1. Just Cheeto Dust

        Midwest.

      2. Marc in MN

        I’ve lived in Minnesota pretty much my whole life. We call it pop here.

    3. Bill

      Regional terminology.  Just like the way some words get pronounced differently depending on what part of the country you are from.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Down here in Oz, it’s call soft drink.

        1. Buckley

          Or fizzy!

    4. Ourorboros

      Somebody did a study on this. You can Google “Soda or Pop”.

    5. Vim-Hogar

      There’s even parts of the country where “Coke” only refers to one specific brand of cola instead of being a synonym to “soda”, though my friends who haven’t lived outside the South find this hard to believe.

      1. Just Cheeto Dust

        “Man, name brand word association is one of the more subtle threats to this nation’s free trade! It gives the larger, well-known companies an unfair advantage. I’m doing my part to keep the playing field level by weaning people off referring to generic products with brand names.”

        1. Ourorboros

          People in the South drink Orange Coke too.
          They were just the dominant brand for a long time, so that all soda was called “Coke”.
          It’s become as meaningless as Xerox, Band-Aid, and Kleenex. People are just asking for that type of product, not just that brand. Marketing people will tell you that level of recognition just isn’t useful.
          “Coke” just means soda/pop/soft-drink.

        2. Marc in MN

          I’ve always found the areas that use “coke” in this way to be the most humorous.

          “I’d like a coke, please.”
          “What kind?”
          “Pepsi!” 😉

        3. Leorale

          Nope, marketing people will tell you this level of recognition is a very worthy goal, because people can’t use the category of product without repeating your name to each other. You’ve become the default. It’s called branding.

        4. David Willis

          Which marketing people told you that? At that level of “recognition,” the trademark becomes genericized and the law can rule that everyone can use it, which is probably not great for your brand. For example, Talon Zipper only owns 7% of worldwide zipper production share despite having named the thing, while YKK gets to produce half the world’s zippers while calling them zippers.

          Not being able to call zippers anything but zippers didn’t really do much for Talon Zipper.

        5. ASD

          ^This.

          Nintendo apparently coined the term “gaming console” to stop people from calling what we call consoles today, “nintendos” and losing the right to use their company’s name in the United States.

        6. David Willis

          In Transformers fiction and in instruction manuals they “convert.” They don’t “transform.” Hasbro doesn’t want other companies to be able to call the transforming robots they make “transformers.”

        7. Ourorboros

          Nope, having people use your company name for the entire product is useless.
          Sure, people use your name all the time, but they don’t think of YOU, which is useless.
          Most people have or do photocopy on Cannons, not Xerox when they ‘Xerox’.
          People will just as comfortably use store brand or Curad bandages when they need a ‘Band-Aid’. In fact the term ‘Band-Aid’ is so generic a short term fix is only ‘Putting a Band-Aid’ on it.
          Do you really care what brand ‘Kleenex’ you use when you need facial tissue? As long as it isn’t the rough, scratchy kind most people don’t even think about it.

          So no, no marketing person wants their brand name to be so ubiquitous that their own product is not longer thought of.

        8. Ourorboros

          That last reply was wordy.
          When your brand name becomes the generic word for a product type, people don’t always attach importance on buying from you – the whole point of brand awareness.
          That is a losing proposition. That isn’t anybody’s goal. A marketing department that finds it to be worthy is fired.

      2. Kryss LaBryn

        In Canada if you order a “Coke” at a restaurant and they only have Pepsi, they’ll ask if Pepsi is okay instead. Or 7-up/Sprite.

        I think if I ordered a Coke somewhere and that was followed by a “What kind?” sort of conversation (aside from, like, diet/regular, which would at least make sense from the poor wait-staff’s point of view) it would end in rage.

  28. Corlanthis

    I find Joyce hiding Pop Machine Jacob’s eyes to be super endearing!

  29. Gottawonder

    I’ve lived in a lot of different parts of the country: called it everything from Soda, to soda pop, to pop. I grew up in mid NY state, we called it pop.

    As for scaring small children: some of us have it and some of us don’t bwahaha. I’m just not a kiddie person. Never have been. Never try to scare the little rascals, but don’t encourage endearments either. Kids are okay, as long as somebody else’s. (and my own :)).

    Joyce has her work cut out for her: Sarah is not exactly a people person.

    1. locixloci

      In London, UK we call them ‘fizzy drinks’.

      1. Ourorboros

        Emril seemed to use the term ‘fizzy drinks’ to refer to mixed drinks with soda.

  30. TaintedSpud

    This will end in tears. And Lolz. And more sweet, sweet tears…

    1. Cragalanch

      Cragalanch thought tears were salty……

      1. madd

        She gots that sugarbetes.

  31. TrueVCU

    OUT! OUT! YOU DEMON OF STUPIDITY!

    1. Keroshino

      Might want to take a look in the mirro…uh…I mean Gravitar!!!

      1. TrueVCU

        …

        OUT! OUT!

        1. Narf

          +10 for Dogbert quote with Sarah grav 😀

  32. Kernanator

    Sarah, what are you doing.

    1. The Candyman

      Sarah, stahp.

  33. Henry

    Sarah, no! Riley just wants you to hear the Good News that is Cocoa Puffs!

  34. Dave

    Coverng Soda-Jacob’s eyes, or copping a feel on his pecs?

    1. Aizat

      Pecs. Definitely pecs.

  35. Shadow12000

    Every time I see the name Aaron now, I think of Breaking Bad…

    1. Varangian

      AMC’s hit new drama, Breaking Exodus

      “How many more people are gonna die because of us?!”
      “No one. Now that God’s sent the locusts, we’re in charge, no one else has to get hurt!”
      “You keep SAYING that and it’s BULLSHIT EVERY TIME!!”

      1. The Candyman

        +1

    2. Jen Aside

      I always think “Diaz”

  36. Ancestral Hamster

    Now, now, Sarah. I find people who say they don’t like children simply haven’t had them in the right sauce. My suggestion is alfredo.

    1. Just Cheeto Dust

      A recipe that Jonathan Swift would approve of.

  37. CianM1301

    “This is between me and you, pop machine!”

  38. Alexis

    I’m loving the focus that Sarah is getting.

    There needs to be more tirades against small children. They just… they just don’t GET that everywhere around a five-foot radius of people like Sarah and I is an old man’s lawn, and they need to get the fuck off before I call the police. They just don’t get it.

  39. Doc Harleen

    Dang – a social situation in which Joyce is the one a teensy bit more savvy than Sarah. First time for everything, I suppose.

    1. Ourorboros

      We have yet to see that Joyce is savvy here. She hasn’t gotten a date by her use of flirting or anything. She was just there.

  40. Kytan

    Right the aaron to her moses… does that mean shes gonna start slandering sarah soon because shes jealous of her?

  41. hof1991

    I wouldn’t be surprised if Riley’s running was disconnected from the whole Jacob ship. Sarah is reacting kinda strongly and Joyce is looking very strange. Maybe Amber is going all AG on Ethan off camera. Just the kind of scene change Willis specializes in. Cute. Drama. Cute. Drama.

    1. Bill

      Ditto.  I thought maybe Sarah was going off on Joyce being so pushy and Riley just got caught in the crossfire.

  42. Jesse

    What was that about?

  43. ninja_jesus

    Cat fight between Roz and Sarah STAT!

    1. Mr K

      They’ll end up making out, and Sarah realizes that she doesn’t really want Jacob anymore

  44. Far

    Umm, Point of Order.
    Aron was the builder of the golden calf while Moses was on the mountain.
    Bad metaphor there.

    1. David Willis

      Learn more than one story about Aaron and Moses.

      1. Kannyn

        Wait, we were supposed to READ the Bible? I thought it was just to hold while other people told us what it meant, so we could tell other people what it meant (hint: “we’re always right”).

        1. Megatron

          I’m pretty sure you can learn more Aaron and Moses stories without reading the Bible. In fact, Prince of Egypt is one of those stories.

        2. David Willis

          But Prince of Egypt completely overlooks the part of the story that today’s strip is specifically referencing.

        3. Megatron

          In my defense, the last time I saw it was in the theaters. Decepticon HQ doesn’t’ get cable or Netflix.

        4. locixloci

          I honestly don’t know how you can stomach reading all these comments Willis. I imagine it would drive me completely crazy if I were the content creator.

          I mean, folk here seem like a very nice bunch, all things considered, but still.

          The only conclusion I can draw from this is that you must be a very different person with different thoughts and emotions and feelings and reactions to things. But that can’t be right. Everyone else is like me… right?

          I forget where I was going with this. Stupid whisky.

        5. Crumplepunch

          Appropriate gravitar is appropriate.

        6. David Willis

          I funnel my rage into my comic.

        7. timemonkey

          I spent like a month reading through it once. It was so boring I forgot all of it.

    2. Mark

      Aaron spoke for Moses because Moses was “slow of speach” If I’m remembering correctly.

    3. Narf

      a winner is not you

  45. OmegaDez

    A Wild Riley Appears

    1. timemonkey

      Sarah used Roar! Wild Riley fled.

  46. Bob Ross

    Who wants to bet that Riley was all jacked up on sugar and was poking/tickling/being annoying her?

    1. Mr K

      Riley Killed Sarah’s parents.

  47. Jack Finch

    Having a second laugh at this strip by substituting pope for pop.

  48. man in black

    great page

  49. Evyn Sea

    Rereading this my brain caught the hair colour of the girl fleeing from Sarah in the fourth panel; my brain had skipped over it, simply presuming her to be Joyce. With that said I politely request for clarification of her identity should she be a pre-established character?

    1. David Willis

      It’s Riley, Roz’s little sister. She’s appeared in strips immediately prior to this. Her name is listed in the tags below the strip.

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