I needed this. The seventh anniversary of my mom’s death is a little over a month away. She mentioned me in her suicide note; she was worried I’d break down if not told gently that she’d killed herself. I still think I could’ve stopped her had I been more present in the situation. I don’t know what I should hold onto, but I’m trying to figure out what direction to go.
Perhaps that even in the depths of her despair and hopelessness, she loved you, wanted you to be OK, thought that there was a way to break it gently so the news would hurt you less, and belief that you would find the strength and courage to live your life without her?
Probably. She had untreated borderline personality disorder and bipolar disorder. When she was manic, she could be an awful person, but she also loved my family and I. She could be emotionally manipulative like Willis’s mom and rarely apologized, but I loved her.
I’d say it’s good advice. Telling people to move on is usually like telling someone to “calm down” when they’re stressed, or “stop crying” when they are.
I feel that “hold on to what you need to but keep walking” is a bit… easier, and a step in the right direction, rather than asking them to solve it all in one swoop.
He’s going to start appearing and talking to Joe now too. Because he’s a ghost who was haunting Amber and Joe has just decided to take on part of that burden.
Although that could possibly mean that Joe will be waking up to ghostly teabagging in the near future.
Miri
Yep, ghostly teabagging is probably how he’ll find out about him.
I think it might be exactly what she neess to hear. Not someone to push her prpblems onto or hide her problems, but someone to simply make it weigh less heavily on her.
Honestly, I think Joe’s being his best self here. Or at the very least, he could be a lot worse.
And as for freezing, it’s currently in the teens here in Hoosierland. Two weeks ago, it was fricking seventy Fahrenheit on Christmas day. I would say “WTF?”, but a lifetime in Indiana has left me deluded into thinking this is normal.
well arm stripes aside it just looks like a plain yellow shirt you can prolly buy online, and the blue part is a separate sleeveless hoodie. (tho i think isaw a post saying willis used online references for outfit designs so maybe there are some stores you can use to find similar clothes lol [tho i guess, other than a pastel or a pattern, yellow isn’t that popular of a shirt color?])
Most of the cast’s outfits seem to be based on stuff Willis finds at a nearby Target or Meijer. If you’re in the Midwest at all, try walking around the nearest block and you’ll probably bump into one. Of course, department stores tend to cycle their clothes pretty often, so it may be either sold out or just rotated out by now. If you’re willing to brave it, you could also search those stores’ websites and hope the terrible layout coughs up a result that can either be delivered or picked up. Naturally, if you’d rather not expend quite so much energy hunting down a shirt like it’s an 18-point buck, you can probably find something comparable on any given clothes site.
Amber’s brothers are pretty great at helping her move a little step forward when she really needs it, aren’t they? (And will almost inevitably ruin it after, but hey.)
The fortunes of fables are able to sing the song
Now witness the quickness with which we get along
To sing the blues you’ve got to live the dues and Carry On–CSNY
wow, i’ve listened to that song so many times that i was singing it in my head
by the 1st 4 words…before i even figured out what it was. ahhh CSNY quotes
You can sing a happy song if you’re glad,
You can sing a protest song if you’re mad,
But if you wanna sing the blues?
Boy you got to learn how to lose, if you wanna sing the blues.
D. Bromberg, RIP
I know for some people, it must be an odd concept. Why wouldn’t Amber want to move on from this death, especially of a person like Mike? Shouldn’t she WANT to move on with her life? In truth, grief is a lot more complicated than ‘getting over’ and ‘moving on’. I lost my mother in April, and there was a period of time where I felt like Amber in panel 4. I didn’t WANT to move on, because it felt like if I did, if I felt better, if I started to adjust to this new life without my mom, it’d become more real. And I’d be that much closer to this new life without her.
It felt as if entrenching myself in my grief for her was the only way to keep her around. To prove that I loved her, to prove she existed. Grief is a process and you just have to find your own way, at your own pace. What Joe said is right. You don’t have to move on and forget someone who has passed, but you do need to carry on in whatever way suits you best, and when you are comfortable. I think about my mom most every day, and I try to do things I know she enjoyed.
that feeling where the sun coming up the next morning is a deliberate insult from the universe. seriously, how dare you, i will fucking cut you. the sun, i mean. not you.
My daughter’s feeling like that over my grandfather’s death 🙁 That she can’t be happy or imagine life without him without it being a betrayal… She’s just turned 7… It’s hard seeing her hating on herself for being human and sometimes being happy 🙁
When we lost my mother, it felt like “moving on” would be a betrayal of her. And it doesn’t matter how many times someone says, “She’d WANT you to move on.”
Don’t remember where I read it, but a badly paraphrased because I don’t remember it quote from my childhood that stuck with me –
when you share your joy with a loved one, the amount of joy in the world doubles so you can each keep it – when you share your pain with a loved one, you each carry half of it – so share things with people you love, and don’t try to hide your pain until you break.
Right this is actually pretty impressive. It’s supportive and he’s not making light of it and I can actually see this sort of working. She needs much more help than this. BUt this a good thing for her to hear I think
Yeah, Joe is being a decent human being and all, but neither of them is dressed for the weather and it is cold outside with sneaux on the ground. They need to get their butts inside before hypothermia sets in.
Hmm, how should Amber carry Joe’s issues? She could try getting a song stuck in her head. When Joe was younger, he watched Richard cry and curse at the wind. He’d broke his own heart, and Joe watched as he tried to reassemble it. And Karen swore that she would never let herself forget. That was the day Joe promised that he’d never speak of love if it does not exist. Unfortunately,
Joyce is the only exception
[Verse 1]
When I was younger I saw my daddy cry
And curse at the wind
He broke his own heart and I watched
As he tried to reassemble it
And my momma swore that she would
Never let herself forget
And that was the day that I promised
I’d never sing of love if it does not exist
alongcameaspider
I forget where I heard this from but I heard the singer hates this song because the guy she wrote it about turned out to be a huge asshole
Hah, sorry, yes. My comment was brought to you by a combination of Benadryl and having had The Only Exception stuck in my head for a week. Thank you, Yumi and Twitcher, for explaining
Joe’s line is indeed raw as hell and something I wish I’d been told. I’m glad Amber isn’t pushing him away like at first (feels like it was so long ago :’3). Look at her laughing!
They have a really sweet dynamic and ffffyea, thank you I needed the wholesome
105 thoughts on “Burden”
Kyrik Michalowski
That was well said Joe, I’m proud of you. This whole thing has gone much better than I expected.
Clif
Well, better than his offer to Sarah. But now Amber has agreed to carry Joyce. This will definitely end well.
Twitcher
I needed this. The seventh anniversary of my mom’s death is a little over a month away. She mentioned me in her suicide note; she was worried I’d break down if not told gently that she’d killed herself. I still think I could’ve stopped her had I been more present in the situation. I don’t know what I should hold onto, but I’m trying to figure out what direction to go.
Miri
I’m so sorry.
Perhaps that even in the depths of her despair and hopelessness, she loved you, wanted you to be OK, thought that there was a way to break it gently so the news would hurt you less, and belief that you would find the strength and courage to live your life without her?
Twitcher
Probably. She had untreated borderline personality disorder and bipolar disorder. When she was manic, she could be an awful person, but she also loved my family and I. She could be emotionally manipulative like Willis’s mom and rarely apologized, but I loved her.
The Wellerman
It feels so good to see her laugh ?
She hasn’t done that in a long time.
Kyrik Michalowski
Indeed, it is nice to see a smile on her face, even if it wasn’t for very long. Them becoming siblings might be a great thing after all.
Cool Sang
I can’t decide if this is good advice or not but boy I think it might be!
Kyrik Michalowski
Even if it isn’t the best advice, it got her to smile which is a great thimg.
alongcameaspider
It’s better then anyone else has offered Amber so far imo
Even if it’s not perfect it’s definitely better then what she’s been doing
Moon
idk but it’s raw as fuck
Jamie
It’s good advice.
Shen Hibiki
I’d say it’s good advice. Telling people to move on is usually like telling someone to “calm down” when they’re stressed, or “stop crying” when they are.
I feel that “hold on to what you need to but keep walking” is a bit… easier, and a step in the right direction, rather than asking them to solve it all in one swoop.
Keulen
It seems like pretty good advice to me.
C.T. Phipps
Ironically, Mike of all people would tell her, “You absolutely should move on from me.”
Kyrik Michalowski
I wonder how all this is going to affect HeadMike and Amber’s reactions to him.
Walky_Talky
He’s going to start appearing and talking to Joe now too. Because he’s a ghost who was haunting Amber and Joe has just decided to take on part of that burden.
Although that could possibly mean that Joe will be waking up to ghostly teabagging in the near future.
Miri
Yep, ghostly teabagging is probably how he’ll find out about him.
Miri
It’s cool. Joe’s going to wake up in the morning to find he has received Head Mike.
Roborat
Guess that is better than waking up receiving Mike head.
Axel_Grease
But with a side note of knowing it would make her feel worse.
MK15
Joe’s actually a pretty good brother. In his own way, of course, but maybe the way Amber needs.
Kyrik Michalowski
I think it might be exactly what she neess to hear. Not someone to push her prpblems onto or hide her problems, but someone to simply make it weigh less heavily on her.
Wizard
Honestly, I think Joe’s being his best self here. Or at the very least, he could be a lot worse.
And as for freezing, it’s currently in the teens here in Hoosierland. Two weeks ago, it was fricking seventy Fahrenheit on Christmas day. I would say “WTF?”, but a lifetime in Indiana has left me deluded into thinking this is normal.
The Wellerman
Seriously though if I don’t find out where she got that shirt of hers, I’m gonna go BANANAS ?
Kyrik Michalowski
What shirt is she wearing?
The Wellerman
That yellow one. So simple yet so sleek.
anon
well arm stripes aside it just looks like a plain yellow shirt you can prolly buy online, and the blue part is a separate sleeveless hoodie. (tho i think isaw a post saying willis used online references for outfit designs so maybe there are some stores you can use to find similar clothes lol [tho i guess, other than a pastel or a pattern, yellow isn’t that popular of a shirt color?])
Delicious Taffy
Most of the cast’s outfits seem to be based on stuff Willis finds at a nearby Target or Meijer. If you’re in the Midwest at all, try walking around the nearest block and you’ll probably bump into one. Of course, department stores tend to cycle their clothes pretty often, so it may be either sold out or just rotated out by now. If you’re willing to brave it, you could also search those stores’ websites and hope the terrible layout coughs up a result that can either be delivered or picked up. Naturally, if you’d rather not expend quite so much energy hunting down a shirt like it’s an 18-point buck, you can probably find something comparable on any given clothes site.
The Wellerman
Eh, I have better stuff to do, but I still want the shirt.
Hmmm….
OK next person to shoot me a link to Amber’s shirt gets a free pixel art commission!!! ?
Daeranilen
This is out of stock but fairly close. You’re looking for a yellow women’s football tee, specifically a style with longer, striped sleeves; any combo of keywords there should help you find something you’ll like. https://www.torrid.com/product/v-neck-football-tee—vintage-burnout-yellow/13632692.html
The Wellerman
Uh… ya want the commission now or…
Needfuldoer
That looks a lot like the shirt Becky wore a couple chapters ago.
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2021/comic/book-11/05-as-long-as-its-free/cake-2/
Yotomoe
They’re good siblings. Cute.
Regalli
That went remarkably well, Joe.
Amber’s brothers are pretty great at helping her move a little step forward when she really needs it, aren’t they? (And will almost inevitably ruin it after, but hey.)
Audkitten
I love the Amber and Joe sibling dynamic
Leorale
He sounds just like my mom
For a nickel. But really he does.
BBCC
That’s a good way to handle it when you can’t or don’t want to move on, carry it in a direction. I like that.
Stephen Bierce
The fortunes of fables are able to sing the song
Now witness the quickness with which we get along
To sing the blues you’ve got to live the dues and Carry On–CSNY
Steelbright
wow, i’ve listened to that song so many times that i was singing it in my head
by the 1st 4 words…before i even figured out what it was. ahhh CSNY quotes
Geneseepaws
You can sing a happy song if you’re glad,
You can sing a protest song if you’re mad,
But if you wanna sing the blues?
Boy you got to learn how to lose, if you wanna sing the blues.
D. Bromberg, RIP
Jay
Wait is Joe a…. DECENT BROTHER!?
Thag Simmons
He’s not a bad one.
Nono
Good brother, bad wingman. Everything balanced out.
Thag Simmons
I’d go so far as saying terrible wingman.
Doopyboop
Oh man, Amber in panel 4…
I know for some people, it must be an odd concept. Why wouldn’t Amber want to move on from this death, especially of a person like Mike? Shouldn’t she WANT to move on with her life? In truth, grief is a lot more complicated than ‘getting over’ and ‘moving on’. I lost my mother in April, and there was a period of time where I felt like Amber in panel 4. I didn’t WANT to move on, because it felt like if I did, if I felt better, if I started to adjust to this new life without my mom, it’d become more real. And I’d be that much closer to this new life without her.
It felt as if entrenching myself in my grief for her was the only way to keep her around. To prove that I loved her, to prove she existed. Grief is a process and you just have to find your own way, at your own pace. What Joe said is right. You don’t have to move on and forget someone who has passed, but you do need to carry on in whatever way suits you best, and when you are comfortable. I think about my mom most every day, and I try to do things I know she enjoyed.
BigDogLittleCat
I’m sorry for your loss. It is a process and we each go through it our own way. Take care of yourself.
The Wellerman
Take care of yourself slick. And thanks for sharing this.
misanthropope
that feeling where the sun coming up the next morning is a deliberate insult from the universe. seriously, how dare you, i will fucking cut you. the sun, i mean. not you.
Axel_Grease
Anyone who’s lost someone understands that moving on can feel like a betrayal.
Miri
My daughter’s feeling like that over my grandfather’s death 🙁 That she can’t be happy or imagine life without him without it being a betrayal… She’s just turned 7… It’s hard seeing her hating on herself for being human and sometimes being happy 🙁
The Quirk
When we lost my mother, it felt like “moving on” would be a betrayal of her. And it doesn’t matter how many times someone says, “She’d WANT you to move on.”
Twitcher
I’m sorry for your loss. I, too, know that feel. What helps you to process?
Rose Red
Don’t remember where I read it, but a badly paraphrased because I don’t remember it quote from my childhood that stuck with me –
when you share your joy with a loved one, the amount of joy in the world doubles so you can each keep it – when you share your pain with a loved one, you each carry half of it – so share things with people you love, and don’t try to hide your pain until you break.
Geneseepaws
That is wonderful advice.
DailyBrad
I love these two as siblings. It really works well.
I do really hope that if Richard blows it, and I hope he doesn’t, that the two would keep it going as siblings, even if it wasn’t official anymore.
Wack'd
joe’s stubble has spread to his ears
Meagan
Aw, Joe is such a good brother here.
Hazel
Damn, Joe is really being an excellent brother here. Really good siblinging from a guy who has only been one for a scant few months.
Samantha
Right this is actually pretty impressive. It’s supportive and he’s not making light of it and I can actually see this sort of working. She needs much more help than this. BUt this a good thing for her to hear I think
Yumi
Nnnnnn, a sweet strip? Between Amber and Joe? My heart.
Opus the Poet
Yeah, Joe is being a decent human being and all, but neither of them is dressed for the weather and it is cold outside with sneaux on the ground. They need to get their butts inside before hypothermia sets in.
michaelinasmeal
Tonight Amber gonna be working on her “Help me stepbrother I’m stuck in my own head” Joe siscon fanfic
RacingTurtle
Hmm, how should Amber carry Joe’s issues? She could try getting a song stuck in her head. When Joe was younger, he watched Richard cry and curse at the wind. He’d broke his own heart, and Joe watched as he tried to reassemble it. And Karen swore that she would never let herself forget. That was the day Joe promised that he’d never speak of love if it does not exist. Unfortunately,
Joyce is the only exception
zee
What
Yumi
It’s an extended reference to a song.
Twitcher
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-J7J_IWUhls
[Verse 1]
When I was younger I saw my daddy cry
And curse at the wind
He broke his own heart and I watched
As he tried to reassemble it
And my momma swore that she would
Never let herself forget
And that was the day that I promised
I’d never sing of love if it does not exist
alongcameaspider
I forget where I heard this from but I heard the singer hates this song because the guy she wrote it about turned out to be a huge asshole
RacingTurtle
Hah, sorry, yes. My comment was brought to you by a combination of Benadryl and having had The Only Exception stuck in my head for a week. Thank you, Yumi and Twitcher, for explaining
Bluewind
*supportively claps at developments*
WanderingLynx
Joe’s line is indeed raw as hell and something I wish I’d been told. I’m glad Amber isn’t pushing him away like at first (feels like it was so long ago :’3). Look at her laughing!
They have a really sweet dynamic and ffffyea, thank you I needed the wholesome
Joyfulldreams