197

Butt
Posted on May 20, 2011 by David M Willis

197 thoughts on “Butt”

  1. Jen Aside

    DANNY WORK THAT BUTT

    er

    1. David Herbert

      And the creepy eyes.

  2. DeWeese07

    heh… pokemon jokes

    1. calendarman27

      How can it be super effective? Cute girl type pokemon have a type advantage over nervous geek types

      1. Andrusi

        Pokemon can use moves other than their own types. Water is weak to Grass and Electric, but Blastoise (Water-type) can learn Ice and Ground-type attacks, which are super effective against Grass and Electric respectively.

        1. Zakrael

          So yeah, Danny is just using a Joe-type attack against her.

          It’s out of type, so it wouldn’t get the STAB, and thus do less damage than a comparatively strong power of the Nervous Geek type. Useful in a pinch, though.

          Feel free to fast forward a few paragraphs to the inevitable joke about Joe and breeding.

        2. Jimbo

          i love this geek commentary

        3. milk experiment

          I don’t know anything about Pokemon, but this seems like solid flirting advice just the same.

        4. ryan

          it’s difficult to STAB with “butt”.

        5. Icalasari

          Joe is in an egg group similar to Ditto’s. The difference is that the egg group can only breed with females

        6. ProjectXa3

          Pokemon and flirting advice. Hurrah for college!

          Also, I’m unfamiliar with the phrase “STAB” as Pokemon game terminology. I figure that it’s some acronym ending in “Attack Bonus” or some such and some “Super” or “Special” thingy, but I can’t place what the T stands for.

        7. Regalli

          Same-Type Attack Bonus. If a Pokemon uses a move that’s the same type as it is, it does more damage than it would if it were a different type.

  3. Rognik

    Funny, I thought she was more of a leg woman…

  4. Chrisby

    Danny that was terrible.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Danny uses CHARM
      It missed!

      1. MeHael

        Amber uses BLUNTNESS
        It missed!

      2. Jackson

        Danny uses THINLY-VEILED ROMANTIC ATTEMPT THROUGH POKEMON REFERENCES

        What the hell, Danny.

        1. Loki

          If there’s anyone that might work on, it’s Amber

        2. Narbodi

          Nah, he’d have to offer to show her his full tier 10 blue set for that.

        3. BMeph

          Sad…you almost had it.
          “Purples for Purples”

  5. Digidestined of Trust (Tim)

    Had I been drinking something that would have been a definite spit take to see Danny do that!

  6. iSaidCandleja-

    So she really was saving that seat…

    with her penis?

    1. Chrisby

      For Danny’s FAAAAAAACE.

      1. Henry

        For a nickel.

      2. Plasma Mongoose

        No she wants his BUUUUUUUUTT!

        1. Chrisby

          Danny has a BUUUUUUTTFAAAAAAAAACE.

        2. ADHadh

          She REQUIRES it.

        3. Mally

          At least she doesn’t require his femurs!

    2. Henry

      Or with her FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE

    3. Bekah

      For his penis more like.

      1. Sat

        PEEEEEEEnis

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          I come here for the webcomic, stay for the deep & intellectual comments. ^_^

          BUTTS: I REQUIRE THEM 😛

        2. Roborat

          Yea, I just love the peanut gallery here. It puts a smile on my FAAAAAACE. . . Sorry, I had to do it.

        3. Plasma Mongoose

          It’s OK, that what memes are made for after all.

        4. Lunchbox

          Jesus, these memes are getting inane.

        5. Thomas

          THERE’S OVER 9000 OF THEM?!?!?!?!

          Sorry. Had to be done.

    4. Spruce

      Oi, thanks. Now I won’t be able to get any rest until I locate some Rule 76’d Amber Rule 34.

      1. sock

        “76. Twinkies are the answers to life’s problems.”

        derp

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          Twinkies? I thought it was Duct Tape that was supposed to be the answer.

  7. Milosh

    I have no idea how many conversations with my friends end up having similar Pokemon-themed comments at some point. My guess is around 40%.

    1. Bekah

      Sounds like my friends.

      1. Silver C.

        You guys make me feel old…(o_o)

        When Pokemon became popular I was graduating from college and I was herding my younger cousins to the mall to play pokemon with the other kids whilst I read a book on a small restaurant right across them.

        1. Xalticus

          This conversation bracket used to be more commonly held by The Simpsons in the form of raw quotes.

        2. Bekah

          I was 13 on 9/11

          Does that make you feel better or worse?

    2. Ragnal

      After having just met a couple that practically breathes Pokemon and YGO…about 70% for me.

    3. Scotch Carb

      Ours mostly will involve the phrase ‘sorry, I’m not really into pokemon.’

      Its the ultimate put-down for anyone who is getting too enthusiastic about something (usually not-pokemon related) that the rest of us couldn’t give a shit about.

      1. G.S.Mercs

        I’m guessing someone reads XKCD?

    4. R

      And with that, I know I’m old.

  8. taekwondogirl

    Hahahaha

  9. Plasma Mongoose

    It begs the question; what are other three moves that Danny knows?

    *FLIRT
    *DEATHSTARE
    *???
    *???

    1. Alechsa

      *Profit

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Is that like PAY DAY?

    2. Chrisby

      *DISGRUNTLED ASIDE

    3. wnderjif

      Ignorance
      PP 15/15 Type: Status Element: Normal
      Disregard the opponent’s and the opponent’s lady friend getting it on in the other side of the room.

      Angst
      PP 100/100 Type: Status Element: Dark
      Increases the Danny’s despair level by 1.

      1. Bekah

        This is most likely accurate.

    4. Pivitor

      *MELANCHOLY*

    5. kagato23

      Justice is his special ability.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        What does JUSTICE do?

        1. Cha

          It’s like Harden.

        2. QueenThomas

          I’ll bet he uses Harden soon.

        3. Plasma Mongoose

          Followed by STRING SHOT no doubt.

        4. BlabbityShnarg

          But not before he gets to use POUND!

        5. Plasma Mongoose

          That or ARM THRUST.

        6. Undrave

          Well the Musketeer Trio/Quartet have the Justified ability.

          Justified: Raises Attack when hit by a Dark-type move.

          In Japan its called ‘Righteous Heart’ so I guess it would fit for him.

        7. Thomas

          I assume that it involves Phoenix Wright.

    6. Steven

      Flirt
      Deathstare
      Leer (Panel 3)
      Confusion (Panel 4)

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        So what would count as his ability then?

        1. Hannover Fist

          Is “rape-face” an ability?

    7. Björn

      * PREACH

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        And Amber’s would be SECRET ID.

    8. Roborat

      SPLASH. What? Think about it, he has no girlfriend, so . . .

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        IIRC the Japanese word for SPLASH is BUKKAKE.

  10. Alechsa

    Danny seems a bit uhh… ready to zoom off like the Roadrunner. Oh but that Mike were near this…

    1. NeoSeraphi

      Of course! Every comic could use more Mike!

      …For some reason, my mother just vehemently agreed with me….and our coin jar is out of nickels…

      1. Narbodi

        I hereby salute you for making me have to think about that one.

  11. Mkvenner

    wow, you can cut the akwardness with a knife.

  12. Digidestined of Trust (Tim)

    Technically though, she used attract by yelling, “DANNY!” because she wanted anyone besides that previous dweeb to sit there. So he didn’t do to much in terms of flirting.

  13. Tristan J

    You’re channeling Joe, there, Danny.

    1. Engelfire

      In his FAAAAAAAAAACE?

      1. VinceNalari

        egad! that comment with that picture is friggin’ terrifying

        1. Lesharo

          It’s the face of Joyce if she actually saw Danny “channeling” Joe in his face..

          …you know with Joe’s penis…
          …in Danny’s FAAAAAAACE

        2. Engelfire

          Unless it was Anti-Joyce. I wonder how David’s going to make her work, if he’s even going to put Anti-Joyce in at all. It’d be hilarious watching her out-sex drive Joe. In front of his FAAAAAACE.

        3. Jackson

          I bet she’ll come out if they get Joyce drunk.

        4. Engelfire

          Quick! Someone get Joyce a triple martini! No, get her FOUR triple martinis!

    2. Zem

      I think that Joe courtship and nerd reference courtship are the only two approaches that he knows.

    3. Narbodi

      S’what happens when you spend enough time with the Joe.

      You become the Joe.

      Next thing you know he’ll be offering to Danny her.

  14. Inara

    “The lady requires your butt.” may just be the greatest thing you’ve ever written. That needs to be a valentine’s or anniversary card right there.

    1. Undrave

      It is quite meme-tastic. Let’s spam it all week long in some form or other next week. Should we switch the ‘lady’ or ‘butt’ in the phrase? The lady requires your FAAAAAAACE!

      1. George

        It’ll probably work better switching out the “butt” unless the comic gives us a really good setup for “The _ requires your butt.” “The lady requires your _” is much more versatile.

        1. Hannover Fist

          What about “the Joe requires your butt…for his penis”.

      2. Rikushadow5

        They are both equally hysterical. Use all three variations.

      3. The Sound Defense

        The butt requires your lady.

        1. Anon

          OMG. THIS!

        2. QueenThomas

          In Soviet Russia, at least.

        3. Engelfire

          In Soviet Russia, FAAAAACE shouts you.

      4. Plasma Mongoose

        My FAAAAAACE requires your BUTT!

        1. iSaidCandleja-

          I’m not really into that sort of thing.

        2. Hannover Fist

          Joe probably is.

        3. Plasma Mongoose

          I can so see Joyce saying that.

  15. RVK

    Iunno. I thought this was adorable. Of course, this is the sort of thing that my boyfriend and I do to each other all the time even after 5 years together. They’re both sarcastic and awkward and Iunno… I guess I’m biased because I am totally rooting for them to get together and stay together, heh.

  16. The Sound Defense

    I like the incredibly awkward way in which Amber and Danny are getting closer. Also I like how DoA Amber don’t take no shit you hear?

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Amber cannot take no shit? No wonder she requires his butt, constipation is very uncomfortable after all.

  17. George

    Is she wearing a shirt with the Dinobot campaign poster on it?

    1. David

      Yes. (Woo, you win a no-prize!)

      1. Animal

        Hey, what’s this? Not one no-prize for me after I’ve accurately spotted every time you drew Sal without a bra, all these years?

        1. Engelfire

          Links. Post. All of them. Now.

        2. Kanto-Master

          FAAAACE=epic for post.
          also: Yes, post those links.

        3. Animal

          Braless Sal expertise can not be given, Grasshopper. It must be earned.

        4. Thenodrin

          Isn’t the noticing prize enough?

          Theno

        5. David

          If, uh, I’ve been drawing a difference betweeen bra’d and commando’d, it’s entirely subconscious.

        6. Mkvenner

          Wait, What?!

  18. Crimson Magic

    Ah, I love the strips featuring Danny. I’ve missed his antics from long ago.

  19. Brendan

    There’s nothing better than that feeling of “I now know I’m not the creepiest person she could conceive of.”

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      AKA “I’ll take any positive attribute she will give me.”

  20. Ridureyu

    Now Danny’s being creepy.

  21. Parismio

    Ah Danny, you’re one step closer to using that condom.
    With your penis.

    1. Rikushadow5

      But no nickel yet. Amber’s not a mother.

      …

      Give her time.

      1. Rikushadow5

        Also, that was less creepy in my head until about .01 seconds after I clicked the “Post Comment” button.

        1. Milosh

          This happens to me frequently.

        2. Narbodi

          You know what they say about hindsight.

          …your mom requires your FAAAACE for a Joe nickel.

          (what the heck am I even saying)

    2. LimeTH

      He COULD use it.
      But she requires his butt.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        I just hope she is gentle with his butt.

      2. dchorror

        She could use it.

        That’s probably about as creepy as I’m intending it to be.

  22. kagato23

    I still ship Roz/Danny because MSPA adventures gave me horrible tendencies to ship everything.

    But now I ship Amber/Danny’s butt. That part is hers. OTP.

    1. dchorror

      Eh, Roz/Danny feels a bit flat.

      Besides, the question is, do you ship Creepy Guy with anybody?

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Other than his hand or maybe a blowup doll, I would say NO.

        1. Thenodrin

          Ship Creepy-Guy with a Fleshlight?

          Theno

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          They got a keyring version of those, don’t they?

        3. Bill M.

          Wha? How would that even work? Keyrings are notoriouosly small… I mean… the opening would be so small… are they for the men who are competing for the least wanted Guinness record of smallest adult phallus?

        4. Plasma Mongoose

          Micropenis is a real medical condition and if anyone needs such a device, it is those guys.

      2. Jackson

        I ship Creepy Guy to somewhere far away from here.

        so creepy

      3. Lesharo

        Now, I’m not sure, but this could always be a situation that requires the liberal application of Mike’s penis. Mike’s penis always helps in the other universe. Or maybe Ninja Rick’s “sword”

  23. Dahlia

    *silent scream*

    1. Aizat

      *Squee*

      1. Narbodi

        *FAAAACE*

  24. Hello, Mr. Anderson

    Well, now Danny has a use for an autographed condom.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      He should sell the autographed condom on eBay and just get one from the men’s room.

    2. dchorror

      That might actually be awkward. “Why is this condom autographed?”

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        “Because having her sign my chest is so cliche.”

  25. Aizat

    Yes! Yes! Yes! He did it!

    1. Aizat

      I know that this might happen I am still suprised that it happened.

  26. goatman95111

    Best interaction between the two so far… Makes me almost sad to imagine Dorothy’s reaction when she figures out Danny can do so much better.

    …Almost

  27. XMD

    It bothers me that this comic is still in the first week of school and I just finished my first semester. TIME MOVES SLOWLY. WILLIS’ COMICS UNREALISTIC.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      If time was moving like in real life, Amber would be in her 30s now.

      1. milk experiment

        In the Walkyverse, I’m pretty sure she is in her late 20s or early 30s.

        1. David

          Yeah, in all my comics except tbhis one, characters age in real time. SP! Amber’s about 28.

  28. Acher

    Owww, she is so cute when she talks dirty.

  29. SallyMae Hillbilly

    Wow. I’m shocked that this happened… It’s the first time I’ve ever successfully predicted anything you’ve done, Willis.

    1. fezzam

      you predicted that amber would require danny’s butt? amazing absolutely amazing.

  30. gangler

    Is it just me, or does Danny come across way creepier today that buckets of blood guy did yesterday? He goes from panel three which isn’t quite Sarah sneaking up behind you, but matches the emotional tenor to panel 4 where he seems to lack sleep and be twitching.

    I really must question Amber’s decision making process here.

    1. dchorror

      Someone who acknowledges that they’re creepy is probably creepier than someone who is just reacting to being called over and being told his butt is required.

      1. gangler

        Yeah, Buckets of blood guy may have acknowledged his creepiness, but Danny greeted Amber with a pickup line while wearing angry eyes and happy smile (the trademark “I’m batshit insane” expression). He then continues after Amber makes it clear his advances are unwelcome, now wearing a similarly unnerving expression.

        I mean, buckets of blood guy may have had some mildly skeevy vibes, and he was certainly aware of this, but I didn’t think I was watching Heath Ledger as The Joker attempting flirtation.

        I mean, maybe it’s just me. If no one else is seeing it then it clearly is, but Danny just looks dangerously insane to me today. If I was greeted by today’s Danny in class, I’d probably pack my shit up and go home, starting the trip off with an incorrect bus just in case. I have no desire to be in his immediate vicinity.

        1. Bekah

          Just out of curiosity, can you ever just go “OOooOOhhHHhh, funny comic! LOL”??

        2. gangler

          For sure. I frequently do, I just have trouble vocalizing that in a way that I’d want to post. Today’s post for example started out something like “Panel Three: Rape Face! lol.”, but the rape reference felt distasteful so I tried to comment on the humor of danny’s expression without it and here we are.

        3. taekwondogirl

          It’s the internet. No such thing as distateful.

          As a side note, I think you’re definitely way over-thinking this. Everyone has herp-derp/creepy moments. Think back; anyone ever take a really unflattering picture of you because they got the picture at exactly the wrong moment? That’s the difference between what Danny’s doing and BoB. BoB’s entire life is like that whereas with Danny, it’s a moment.

        4. gangler

          Good point. She’s already met him before. She knows he’s a pretty tame person with some mild social awkwardness and general loneliness after a recent breakup. There’s not a whole lot of worry, she’s already decided he’s harmless.

          Still, it’s fun to see these kinds of faces on Danny. His character tends to have 2 settings, bland and heartbroken. It’s a side of him I don’t think we’ve seen before.

        5. Narbodi

          I like to think of it as a defensive mechanism. I do it on occasion if I’m having a particularly bad day.

          I get moody to such a point that I throw caution to the wind and act/speak on impulse. Usually this means cracking jokes/pointing out things I’d usually keep to myself. On two occasions, it resulted in shameless flirting. The latter got me a girlfriend for the better half of high school, so I suppose it wasn’t all bad.

          …although she did decide she was lesbian instead of just bi not long out of high school… hm.

        6. Xalticus

          Amber appear’s to already be in a state of avoidance, as she seems to have changed to the seat at the end of the row, rather than the one she is now directing Danny to sit in. Her reasoning for moving is most likely due to buckets of blood guy deciding to sit directly behind her previous(soon to be Danny’s) seat.

  31. Lloyfid

    Inarticulate “awww soocute” noises are my only commentary on this, which is a first for this comic.

  32. lord of dance

    maybe danny has mad game with the “anybody but them” crowd. i guess extreme normalcy has its advantages

  33. cruncher3019

    Her shadow is a thumbs down.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Accidental artisic mistake or indicating subtext?

  34. MO

    What did Roz DO to him?!

    1. gangler

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_JEa71aS3oU&t=3m30s

      Poor Danny didn’t even notice that Joe was also in the crowd. It was like that, but with Sex. They wanted a protege, but Roz could hardly get herself knocked up what with her public image as the spokesperson of condom use. The result, poor danny’s mind has been warped to contain the full horrors of Joe and Roz combined. He was given a single condom. His only instructions were to use it.

  35. Aizat

    Awww! What a cute couple these two will make but knowing Willis this couple might not last long.

  36. Deimir

    Hahaha, I love it, WIllis.

    Totally going to use the Super-Effective line with my girlfriend later today…maybe get her some sweet chocolates so I have a same type attack bonus?

  37. Julia

    I definitely read “It’s…super effective” in a Captain Kirk voice

    1. Lt. Taz

      I always read it in Captain Falcon’s voice for some reason.

  38. daughterofthestars

    Can I bend my elbow that way?

    Anyway I like this new development. I’ve forgotten how they’ve interacted in past comics, though, so I’ll have to go back and look.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      I know I cannot, I can do the pointing down thing but not raise the elbow anywhere above the shoulder line, let alone my head.

      1. Hello, Mr. Anderson

        I don’t think it’s the elbow; that shoulder is REALLY flexible! Must be from pre-WOW exercises

    2. Aizat

      I can.

  39. ziggy78eog

    Danny’s “flirt” ability is not as effective as he thought it was; but then again, that is the case for most guys.

  40. Prospero

    ,Hey Willis,
    Did you use Jesus’ full name in your Friday comic because he is supposedly coming back on Saturday?

    By the way, favorite comic on the interwebs!

    1. Mercury

      Full name? But what about all the middle names?

      1. Narbodi

        Don’t forget titles. Man’s gotten a lot of titles over the years.

        Wonder what the “H” stands for.

        Herbert?

        1. CWR

          Heyzeus.

          See what I did there?

          Layers. Layers McIntyre.

  41. Lt. Taz

    Panel 3 Danny is slightly creepy. He looks like he’s ready for the kill.

  42. Zepher

    Punchline made me gigglesnort.

    Keep up the excellent work, Mr. Willis!

  43. Zem

    So is the lesson here that it is better to be a cute doormat?

    (I realize that these two strips were only a ploy to have D and A sit next to each other, but still. THE MESSAGE. YOu gotta think about the message.)

  44. Janette

    Poor Danny expected to be shot down–he seems confused that he wasn’t.

  45. Random Webcomics Junkie

    For some reason that line, coupled with Danny’s bemused reaction, makes Amber seem kind of dominatrix-y. “THE LADY REQUIRES YOUR BUTT.” You can almost see her leering and stepping close, sadistic implement in hand.

    1. wnderjif

      i saw that show, or was it jus bad femdom porn? either way, it is NOT funny.

  46. Roborat

    Love the pokemon joke. The last panel made me LOL, and I am at work, so it must have been super effective. And I suspect we have a new meme now.

  47. PetsinWinter

    A pokemon reference… by the character that shares my name!?

    UN-DAMN (bless?) YOU, WILLIS!!!

  48. Kirby

    xD I think one of the things I like about this comic is there is a limited number of trolls.

    And there’s a limited amount of arguing. As opposed to Shortpacked, which I’ve given up reading the comments on. XD I think he’s started doing things to start arguments at this point….

    I love the comics though. ^^

    *coughs* And for everyone’s sake, his ability would be Oblivious. *nod nods*

    1. Hello, Mr. Anderson

      You missed the whole “Team Joe” and “Team Joyce” arguing during and after their date a few months back.

      1. Kirby

        No, I read that. XD

        I just mean there’s a lot more goodhearted posts on this comic than there are on some of the other ones. <__>

        Not to say there isn’t a lot of arguing on this one. XD

    2. taekwondogirl

      Heh, limited amounts of arguing? You must have just started reading this haha.

      1. Kirby

        Not really.

        I just mean there isn’t arguing on every single strip. xD

        If this were Shortpacked there’d still be the Joe/Joyce debates.

        1. Anon

          Robin’s being eaten alive over there. I hope if she does appear here it doesn’t carry over…

  49. Plasma Mongoose

    Willis, I don’t suppose there will be any storyline in the future of DoA where the Dalai Lama will transform Joyce into a rival crimefighter who uses her ass for Justice?

    This is what I get for watching crazy animes like Butt Attack Punisher Girl Gotaman

    1. BMeph

      Surely, she’d be thwarted the first time someone blocks her butt…

      …with their FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE!

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        I am fairly certain that a butt will defeat a FAAAAAACE.

    2. ryan

      i must search for this when i get home.

  50. Thatguy

    I’m not even a pokemon nerd and I still love this strip to the bitter end

  51. Kelsey

    THE LADY DOES NOT APPRECIATE YOUR CLEVER QUIPS, DANNY.

Leave a Reply to Steven Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

*

*

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.