You’re canonically saying Tony’s dick is bigger than the rest of him.
Wizard
There’s not much correlation between overall height and penis size. Until we get a description or a Slipshine, it’s anybody’s guess just what he’s packing. (Fun fact: male porn actors tend to be shorter than average, which has the advantage of making their dong look proportionately bigger.)
That’s not the point. Tony’s 5’6″ with a 6’0″ penis.
Sirksome
He’s a grower not a show-er!
Tesset
He doesn’t shower?? Gross, can’t believe Sarah likes him
Decidedly Orthogonal
Maybe he prefers bathing? Not everyone thinks showers are golden.
Rolf of Many Doors
That’s 6′ wide, 0″ long, mind you
Taffy
What is it, a friggin’ PS1 billboard graphic? Y’know, those “objects” that aren’t a 3D model but instead a flat plane with just a .jpg of something, to fill the space without overloading on polygons?
Doesn’t need to be big to get the job done.
Ladies been doing it for themselves or each other with a single finger which is only (pauses to measure own middle finger) 3 inches (7cm) long. Big or small, thick or thin, the only thing that really matters is finding what one’s partner likes and doing that.
my now-dead grandparent is a holocaust survivor who was firsthand witness to what happened in Austria. When I still talked to him about what it was like to watch it happen, is definitely a far cry from how you learn about it in school
like, historical narratives put into US schoolbooks tend to make turning points in history seem so obvious in hindsight — not so much the case for people going about their lives at the time it was happening
it wasn’t like oh, you just wake up one day and suddenly there’s troops in the streets doing 21 salutes, swastikas everywhere, books getting burned, homes being looted, etc.
all of these happened at different dates, spread over a long period of time, in what the majority of people living there still called a democratic republic all the while, because they were not able to identify any particular event as a point of no return, no more than we are today
reactionaries in Germany in and out of government proceeded to slowly and steadily exaggerate the alleged threat of violence from leftists, Jews, Romas, Slavs, queers, etc, such that when they were violent against US, it looked to enough people like it was self-defense
Even as shit started getting gradually worse, normies just started turning a blind eye, hoping the problem to be fixed on it’s own, this collective cynicism grew, the Nazi movement took as much as it did because of the willingness to give up on things being better, and just wanting things to run smoothly
— cuz let’s face it, they didn’t care about the collective effort needed to make free, fair society happen as long as they got their chicken sandwiches ?
Laura
Oh. My goodness.
Thank you for this beautiful analysis, NG. I so appreciate you.
I so appreciate you.
Laura
Nope. Wrong avvy.
Laura
Oh, hej, by the way, apparently there’s now another Laura in the comments section.
“Hi, other Laura!” (*waves*)
So I’ll always use this avvy so folx can tell us apart.
I’m glad you find it beautiful, for what that’s worth
as history repeats itself, some very ugly, horrific and unspeakable things are going to happen in the country I grew up in, to countless vulnerable homies
I do not want to risk winding up in the same position as my grandparent was in nearly 100 years ago, for I may not be nearly as lucky T_T
Laura
I’m sorry, that came out wrong.
I didn’t mean to say that what happened was beautiful at ALL!
Just that the way you framed it so succinctly: your words did a beautiful job of explaining how it all happened.
Sorry for any ambiguity!
hey it alright, I got what ya were tryin to express
Steamweed
With most places, it depends on your work experience/skills and/or money.
Mturtle7
Before moving to another country, you might at least consider moving to another state within the USA! The new administration’s efforts are disastrous, but they’re not equally disastrous across the nation. A lot of them, like California or Colorado, are really actively resisting federal pressures to be more queerphobic. Here’s a pretty recent risk assessment map, if you’re interested in the details: https://www.erininthemorning.com/p/erins-anti-trans-risk-map-early-legislative?utm_source=publication-search
Taffy
Interesting that Illinois is all blue on that graphic, when I’m pretty sure half my neighbors would gladly provide extra gasoline if any of them lit me on fire in the street. Must be that Chicago influence skewing the results yet again.
That or trans people really like meth.
Nymph
Everyone really likes meth if they try it a few times.
Yumi
The color ratings are based on state law and protections/persecutions (so, yes, influence from the Chicago area)… I’m glad I at least live in a low-risk state, and also that I live in a relatively safe area within said state. All states, including the safest, have areas where trans people are unsafe, including from local government.
but anti-trans legislation is only one domino to fall at the very least,
is good idea to know some back-up countries,
the next 2000 days are a very good time for trans, queer, POC, low-immune system and other vulnerable homies to have a “hope for the best, prepare for the WORST” attitude, emphasis on the worst ?
Laura
Could you go south to Baja, maybe camp out there for a while? I know Mexico’s got its own persecution, but at least the health care is cheaper there.
I’m also visibly Jewish and barely white-passing, auDHD and physically disabled.
Canada’s been getting a lot more right wing and everyone else gonna be having the same idea, thus straining their healthcare systems and compelling their government to make difficult choices
so ideally I’d want to be as far away from the north American continent as possible, so maybe somewhere in Europe or even South America?
I really wish there were a map of countries or something in order of how accommodating they are to disabled/trans/queer/Jewish/autistic refugees from the United States
cuz I don’t have much money to begin with, let alone to move, so when I’m able to move I REALLY need to make it count
Laura
Well, from an immigration law perspective, migrating anywhere with refugee status from the US is likely impossible.
Disabled folks with SSDI income may qualify for a “retiree” or “pensioner” visa. Many are limited to people over age 40, though. (No SSI payments outside the US.)
For someone of your coding skills, likely the easiest “migration niche” to slide into would be as a “digital nomad”. Although that might require presenting yourself as more financially stable than you are, to gain admission.
If you are a US Citizen, you should be able to enter Mexico and many EU countries without even needing a visa, through the visa waiver program. Staying long-term or engaging even in self-employment, though, is much harder.
In the past, I believe many across the world used to hold out hope for Israel, at least symbolically, as a place to find some refuge, at least from antisemitism, but you know how things are there, now. *Shaking my head.*
As a “Digital Nomad,” though, Malta scores highly.
heh, Sweden is on the trans-accommodating list, which was actually one of my first thoughts, given their track-record for personal freedom, education, and social safety nets (plus one of my friends from the GameMaker community actually lives there)
thank you, very much appreciate these lists Laura, I’m sure my trans and queer homies will too ;-;
Laura
Thanks, friend.
I share many similar intersectionalities with what you describe. I’m just fatalistic about it all, though. Either that or too heavily medicated to have an emotional investment in the future. Jury’s still out on that question…
hey, hey, we just gotta keep a steady pace when making our exit plans,
and even as these events our happening, sharing resources like you do and other organizational efforts will help us mitigate the damage — the ship may be sinking, but we can continue to get more and more vulnerable homies on the life boats as that’s happening
I KNOW a better future is possible. I don’t know whether or not it’s likely, but it’s possible.
Social progress, multiculturalism, is all about knowing that there’s 100 ways forward, and only one way back, so many ways we could share power and make better social outcomes such that everyone’s a winner, if we could just let go of the establishments of ages past, of capitalism, of hierarchy, of bigotries guising themselves as “traditions”
Not the way it looks for the territory which currently calls itself the United States — the system is broken and can clearly no longer accurately represent our interests, and normies unwilling to give up even a chicken sandwich, let alone social media and other capitalist habits for our sake.
TL;DR there’s still hope for the future, just not over here
174 thoughts on “Dad-groan”
Ana Chronistic
Good things came in a small package
…
wait no?
Ana Chronistic
came hurrrhrhrhrhrhhhhrrruuru
a/snow/mous/e
whoa, TMI
a/snow/mous/e
(joking)
Steamweed
TPI
(too patreon information)
Decidedly Orthogonal
NPEI – Not Patreon Enough Information
Steamweed
Coming (heh) soon to a Patreon or Slipshine near you!
Rolf of Many Doors
TOPI
(too other patreon information)
Sirksome
Do we know it was a small package? Tony could be bigger than he looks.
Taffy
You’re canonically saying Tony’s dick is bigger than the rest of him.
Wizard
There’s not much correlation between overall height and penis size. Until we get a description or a Slipshine, it’s anybody’s guess just what he’s packing. (Fun fact: male porn actors tend to be shorter than average, which has the advantage of making their dong look proportionately bigger.)
Taffy
That’s not the point. Tony’s 5’6″ with a 6’0″ penis.
Sirksome
He’s a grower not a show-er!
Tesset
He doesn’t shower?? Gross, can’t believe Sarah likes him
Decidedly Orthogonal
Maybe he prefers bathing? Not everyone thinks showers are golden.
Rolf of Many Doors
That’s 6′ wide, 0″ long, mind you
Taffy
What is it, a friggin’ PS1 billboard graphic? Y’know, those “objects” that aren’t a 3D model but instead a flat plane with just a .jpg of something, to fill the space without overloading on polygons?
HueSatLight
It’s probably average size, just prehensile.
John Campbell
The other way around, I think.
Needfuldoer
No, Sarah’s tall.
Rose by Any other Name
Doesn’t need to be big to get the job done.
Ladies been doing it for themselves or each other with a single finger which is only (pauses to measure own middle finger) 3 inches (7cm) long. Big or small, thick or thin, the only thing that really matters is finding what one’s partner likes and doing that.
Forvisk
More like Small packages came into good things. Hope the small package had a small package around his pack.
Steamweed
Why you calling Sarah a small package?! She’s tall!
butts
well something’s clearly gone wrong, Joyce and Sarah are smiling in the same panel
Grimey
It is the smile singularity upon us. The smilarity of you will.
Deanatay
Singu-hilarity
Davus
Do we know what happened yet?
Alongcameaspider
Presumably getting coffee with Tony went really well
Thag Simmons
Potentially better than really well
Steamweed
Hopefully _very_ well.
mindbleach
She’s twitterpated!
Yet another term possibly ruined by Elmo.
chuckroast
Don’t associate that creature of a man with that poor, sweet, innocent red muppet. He doesn’t deserve that.
NGPZ
speaking of,
would anyone happen to know of good countries us queer and trans folk could move to before the incoming monorail disaster? ?
Bloody Altima
We’re on our own bruv. Everyone else has the same, “refugees and immigrants BAD,” bug.
Decidedly Orthogonal
You have allies here in Canada, and we do accept some refugees. I’m just worried that’s like fleeing to Austria or Poland c.1937
NGPZ
my now-dead grandparent is a holocaust survivor who was firsthand witness to what happened in Austria. When I still talked to him about what it was like to watch it happen, is definitely a far cry from how you learn about it in school
like, historical narratives put into US schoolbooks tend to make turning points in history seem so obvious in hindsight — not so much the case for people going about their lives at the time it was happening
it wasn’t like oh, you just wake up one day and suddenly there’s troops in the streets doing 21 salutes, swastikas everywhere, books getting burned, homes being looted, etc.
all of these happened at different dates, spread over a long period of time, in what the majority of people living there still called a democratic republic all the while, because they were not able to identify any particular event as a point of no return, no more than we are today
reactionaries in Germany in and out of government proceeded to slowly and steadily exaggerate the alleged threat of violence from leftists, Jews, Romas, Slavs, queers, etc, such that when they were violent against US, it looked to enough people like it was self-defense
Even as shit started getting gradually worse, normies just started turning a blind eye, hoping the problem to be fixed on it’s own, this collective cynicism grew, the Nazi movement took as much as it did because of the willingness to give up on things being better, and just wanting things to run smoothly
— cuz let’s face it, they didn’t care about the collective effort needed to make free, fair society happen as long as they got their chicken sandwiches ?
Laura
Oh. My goodness.
Thank you for this beautiful analysis, NG. I so appreciate you.
I so appreciate you.
Laura
Nope. Wrong avvy.
Laura
Oh, hej, by the way, apparently there’s now another Laura in the comments section.
“Hi, other Laura!” (*waves*)
So I’ll always use this avvy so folx can tell us apart.
NGPZ
I’m glad you find it beautiful, for what that’s worth
as history repeats itself, some very ugly, horrific and unspeakable things are going to happen in the country I grew up in, to countless vulnerable homies
I do not want to risk winding up in the same position as my grandparent was in nearly 100 years ago, for I may not be nearly as lucky T_T
Laura
I’m sorry, that came out wrong.
I didn’t mean to say that what happened was beautiful at ALL!
Just that the way you framed it so succinctly: your words did a beautiful job of explaining how it all happened.
Sorry for any ambiguity!
NGPZ
hey it alright, I got what ya were tryin to express
Steamweed
With most places, it depends on your work experience/skills and/or money.
Mturtle7
Before moving to another country, you might at least consider moving to another state within the USA! The new administration’s efforts are disastrous, but they’re not equally disastrous across the nation. A lot of them, like California or Colorado, are really actively resisting federal pressures to be more queerphobic. Here’s a pretty recent risk assessment map, if you’re interested in the details: https://www.erininthemorning.com/p/erins-anti-trans-risk-map-early-legislative?utm_source=publication-search
Taffy
Interesting that Illinois is all blue on that graphic, when I’m pretty sure half my neighbors would gladly provide extra gasoline if any of them lit me on fire in the street. Must be that Chicago influence skewing the results yet again.
That or trans people really like meth.
Nymph
Everyone really likes meth if they try it a few times.
Yumi
The color ratings are based on state law and protections/persecutions (so, yes, influence from the Chicago area)… I’m glad I at least live in a low-risk state, and also that I live in a relatively safe area within said state. All states, including the safest, have areas where trans people are unsafe, including from local government.
NGPZ
I mean I’m already in California,
but anti-trans legislation is only one domino to fall at the very least,
is good idea to know some back-up countries,
the next 2000 days are a very good time for trans, queer, POC, low-immune system and other vulnerable homies to have a “hope for the best, prepare for the WORST” attitude, emphasis on the worst ?
Laura
Could you go south to Baja, maybe camp out there for a while? I know Mexico’s got its own persecution, but at least the health care is cheaper there.
NGPZ
yeah I mean it’s an option?
I’m also visibly Jewish and barely white-passing, auDHD and physically disabled.
Canada’s been getting a lot more right wing and everyone else gonna be having the same idea, thus straining their healthcare systems and compelling their government to make difficult choices
so ideally I’d want to be as far away from the north American continent as possible, so maybe somewhere in Europe or even South America?
I really wish there were a map of countries or something in order of how accommodating they are to disabled/trans/queer/Jewish/autistic refugees from the United States
cuz I don’t have much money to begin with, let alone to move, so when I’m able to move I REALLY need to make it count
Laura
Well, from an immigration law perspective, migrating anywhere with refugee status from the US is likely impossible.
Disabled folks with SSDI income may qualify for a “retiree” or “pensioner” visa. Many are limited to people over age 40, though. (No SSI payments outside the US.)
For someone of your coding skills, likely the easiest “migration niche” to slide into would be as a “digital nomad”. Although that might require presenting yourself as more financially stable than you are, to gain admission.
If you are a US Citizen, you should be able to enter Mexico and many EU countries without even needing a visa, through the visa waiver program. Staying long-term or engaging even in self-employment, though, is much harder.
In the past, I believe many across the world used to hold out hope for Israel, at least symbolically, as a place to find some refuge, at least from antisemitism, but you know how things are there, now. *Shaking my head.*
As a “Digital Nomad,” though, Malta scores highly.
https://gaydigitalnomads.com/best-countries-for-digital-nomads/
https://aparthotel.com/blog/best-countries-for-transgender-expats/
https://expatsi.com/legalities-rights-freedoms/transgender-countries/
NGPZ
heh, Sweden is on the trans-accommodating list, which was actually one of my first thoughts, given their track-record for personal freedom, education, and social safety nets (plus one of my friends from the GameMaker community actually lives there)
thank you, very much appreciate these lists Laura, I’m sure my trans and queer homies will too ;-;
Laura
Thanks, friend.
I share many similar intersectionalities with what you describe. I’m just fatalistic about it all, though. Either that or too heavily medicated to have an emotional investment in the future. Jury’s still out on that question…
:-/
NGPZ
hey, hey, we just gotta keep a steady pace when making our exit plans,
and even as these events our happening, sharing resources like you do and other organizational efforts will help us mitigate the damage — the ship may be sinking, but we can continue to get more and more vulnerable homies on the life boats as that’s happening
I KNOW a better future is possible. I don’t know whether or not it’s likely, but it’s possible.
Social progress, multiculturalism, is all about knowing that there’s 100 ways forward, and only one way back, so many ways we could share power and make better social outcomes such that everyone’s a winner, if we could just let go of the establishments of ages past, of capitalism, of hierarchy, of bigotries guising themselves as “traditions”
Not the way it looks for the territory which currently calls itself the United States — the system is broken and can clearly no longer accurately represent our interests, and normies unwilling to give up even a chicken sandwich, let alone social media and other capitalist habits for our sake.
TL;DR there’s still hope for the future, just not over here
here, especially in the US “heartland”, it looks like all roads lead to Rome ?
Laura
Thank you, my friend. I do so appreciate you for talking through all this here. It helps me so much. So much.
NGPZ
✌??
Steamweed
I like the term “muskolini”.
Miafillene
I prefer…”pumpkin spice Palpatine.”
Laura
Muskrat?
Musky odor?
Ana Chronistic
Elongated Muskrat
Laura
Ooh! I like that one!
Sirksome
She spend the night with Tony?
BorkBorkBork
OK, Joe, that’s not really evidence of anything.
After all, depending on how hard she hit, you might not have any lasting memories of it anyways.
clif
You and the alt-text make a fair point.
Steamweed
Yeah, but we see no evidence of head trauma or scarring on Joe.
Nono
Looks like Tony being shorter wasn’t that big of a hurdle for her after all. 🙂
Osopescado
No, a smaller hurdle probably.
Steamweed
Everyone’s the same height in bed…
Decidedly Orthogonal
Sadly not. It can make kissing during missionary a real challenge.
Steamweed
That, yeah, definitely.
*nods in 2-meters-vs-1.4-meters
Nono
Who’s to say a baseball bat isn’t involved in sex with Tony?
Wait he’s a quarterback, maybe a football instead.
Nymph
I don’t think I’ve seen a football bat, what do those look like?
Antsan
Well, you take a football and then you add wings.