145

Direction
Posted on February 13, 2013 by David M Willis

145 thoughts on “Direction”

  1. The Sound Defense

    Danny is so unobservant it’s adorable.

    1. |Agent

      He will figure it out. There is no way that he cannot. I am only curious as to whether he’s going to play it cool and let Amber have her own rope.

      1. LaurelRaven

        Never underestimate the power of a Danny to be completely oblivious, no matter the size of the cluebat beating down on his skull.

        1. Raoullefere

          Like I said in the last comments, mediocre sneakiness is all you need when dealing with Danny.

        2. T Campbell

          It’s why he makes such a great Lois. At this point he’s a better Lois than Lois herself.

        3. IndigoRei

          So anything above a critical fail will do.

        4. LaurelRaven

          You might even be able to fudge it with a critical fail…

        5. ProjectXa3

          I wholeheartedly approve of your icon!

    2. blueyesion

      sounds creepy with the super dark avatar.

  2. Plasma Mongoose

    But how do cupcakes improve computer performance??

    1. Aizat

      It doesn’t improve computer performance but it does improve your relationship performance.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        So life really is like a dating sim then… cool!

        1. Yotomoe

          No wonder everything people say just sounds like gibberish to me.

        2. Boom

          That depends on whether you’re a Clanger or not…

        3. Aizat

          Well, yeah. It’s just that there’s no strategy guide.

        4. ender1200

          No one wrote a stategy guide?
          Man real life has the worst fanbase ever!

        5. Aizat

          Well, technically there are some strategy guides but some people think that it’s a load of crap.

        6. Andrusi

          I think Amber is trying to be the strategy guide.

        7. Zababcd

          If you happen to run into a girl with the same frequency you would in some dating sims, they will think you are a stalker. But don’t worry, you just have to know how to load your earlier save file… You did create a save point, didn’t you?

      2. that bard

        Actually, by giving the user of the computer a sugar rush, the cupcakes could give the illusion that the computer is actually SLOWER.

      3. Aeyt

        But it DOES improve computer performance. It’s the universal law of cupcake. ALL things are improved by delicious cupcakes. Oh look puppies, so cute, add cupcakes, even better. Fancy Italian dinner, delicious, throw in a cupcake, double delicious. Sexy girls kissing, who realistically doesn’t like that, add cupcakes, and you don’t even have to queue the cheesy cliché sexy time music. Cupcakes = winning

        1. Ziaheart

          But puppies eating a cupcake you wanted to eat later doesn’t make puppies better!

          OOOH I like the new sliding comment box!

    2. Inara

      I’ve always found that a good dose of vitamin cupcake can really help prevent PEBCAK errors.

    3. LaurelRaven

      They have no effect on computer performance; however, they do affect user performance, and user mood. Improved user mood will have the effect of making the computer APPEAR to run better, and thus further improving user satisfaction and mood. Before you know it, this cycle of user mood / apparent performance / cupcaky goodness will spiral upward into a greater sense of euphoria and accompany feelings of Nirvana, until the user actually passes into a greater state of being as an entity of pure joy.

      …now I want a cupcake, too.

      1. GShyft

        You just described the end goals of transhumanism replacing cupcakes for technology. I’m pretty sure your plan is better.

    4. Galeus

      Well, you can use the computer to extrapolate a model of the entire universe from the cupcake, and create the Total Perspective Vortex.

  3. David Herbert

    All the cupcakes.

    1. Chug

      cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuupcaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaakes

      1. Tucker

        Cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuupcaaaaaaaaaaaaaaakes

        In her faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaace!

  4. Dranorter

    The gambit will work perfectly until he has any reason to complain about a!g behind her back.

  5. HK-A6A7

    I have 8 gigs of ram.
    …
    That Motherboard makes me feel like a primitive.

    1. The Aussie Bloke

      My brother built himself a computer with 64 gig of ram.

      He’s a firm believer in the concept of “if it’s worth doing, it’s worth OVER-doing”

      1. Digidestined of Trust (Tim)

        HOW THE HECK did he manage to come across a 64 GB Ram? And how is it compatible with his computer?

        1. White Rice

          I’m willing to bet that the total RAM is 64 gigs, not a single stick of 64 gig. I’ve seen boards with 8 slots, and 8 sticks of 8 takes us to 64 quite nicely (I want to say I’ve encountered some 16’s as well, but that’s taking things a bit too far)

        2. The Aussie Bloke

          I don’t know. He’s got: i7 3820 CPU, 64 gb ram, 128 SSD boot drive, 2 Tb storage drive, gigabyte 650TI overclocked Graphics card, xoner x2 sound card, on a DX79TO intel motherboard. Built the whole thing himself, from scratch. And I think he’s using the latest Windows upgrade, not sure.

        3. miyto

          laptop or desktop computer?
          desktop towers (ie not iMacs but instead Mac Pros; or equivalent machines) have proper-sized fans which allow for 32GB RAM cards and have 4-8 RAM card slots on-board (last I checked in early 2012; they hadn’t made a new mac tower in fivish years, just added better upgrade options)
          Laptops (ie MacBook Pros, or equivalent laptops) can on the fringe hold the 16GB RAM cards with 4(I think?) RAM card slots; I do not recommend sitting such a laptop on your lap, you will likely burn

        4. miyto

          And I’ve just double checked those specs, they were the ‘official’ come in the box numbers for the Mac Pro (2009 high-end model), un-officially it can take 128 RAM with customization.
          The mac-boxes made since have the same max specs with less card slots to get there (refinement of the same computer rather than adding in any more excess; if they wanted they could double the RAM capacity by adding the option for 8 RAM card slots back in)
          Someday I will obtain a Mac Pro and it’s hardware will be more than I will ever need, at least until (screwy stuff like) quantum computers and computer-to-brain interfaces become commercial products

        5. Digidestined of Trust (Tim)

          I have a MacBook Pro 2009 DDR3 and the highest amount of RAM compatible with mine is 2 4GIGS of Ram totaling to 8 gigs

        6. Saru

          Does he not play games? That video card is a clear weakest link.

        7. The Aussie Bloke

          It’s a desktop. He’s using it as an audio workstation. The idea was to make a computer that he wouldn’t have to upgrade in a couple year’s time.

        8. Anonymous

          Perhaps he has 8 slots in his motherboard and each has an 8 gig stick?

  6. Ryorin

    Dinah may be my spirit animal, but Amber knows where my heart lies.

    1. Ryorin

      I have misspelled the name of my spirit animal. I am hanging my head in shame.

  7. RobHagen

    Amazi-Girl Gambit: Ask for computer motherboard, when you really want cupcakes. Awesome. 🙂

    1. Yotomoe

      I want a motherboard made of cupcakes. I want an E-Z bake desktop.

      1. Wonder Wig

        My last computer pretty much became an easy bake oven with how often it overheated.

        1. Resne

          I had a laptop that doubled as a skillet on the bottom. We can make a kitchen.

        2. AckAckAck

          This comment link gave a whole new meaning for “Internet Cafe”

  8. Aizat

    20 bucks…..I don’t know how much is the rate of exchange of Malaysian Ringgit to USD but 20 bucks where I’m from can net you stuff from cooling fans to USB controller.

    1. Dranorter

      Where I’m from too bro. But she probably has that kind of stuff already, just not a fancy motherboard.

      1. AckAckAck

        Hello neighbours.

  9. Count Dracula

    Amber has an…unhealthy fixation on those cupcakes. Just the thought reduces her to gibbering madness. It’s too bad she won’t be getting any. At least she can be happy for Amazi-Girl!

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Cupcakes give her super-strength,

      1. Aizat

        Chocolate cupcakes give her ultra strength.

        1. Yotomoe

          And if you add sprinkles…look out.

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          Triple chocolate cupcakes give her diabetes.

        3. Count Dracula

          Diabetes: Amazi-Girls kryptonite? News at 11.

          In a coincidence, diabetes is also not invited to partake in Amber’s raids. Nobody knows why this is, besides the fact that it is a disease.

      2. Wack'd

        Man, there was a book series I read as a kid where there was this superhero powered by cupcakes that his mad-scientist siblings made, and they’d give him a different power each time. Can’t remember what the title was.

    2. Spazman

      If I may, there is one thing you may have overlooked:

      Cupcake frosting.

      And the cupcakes themselves.

      I mean….cupcakes!

    3. Raoullefere

      I’m sure Joe would think Amber for the cupcakes, if he was willing to risk his cover.

      1. Raoullefere

        Or even thank her (oy, my fingers)

  10. Plasma Mongoose

    I have a bad feeling that if you give Amber the cupcakes, she will eat them before you have a chance to give it to Amazi-Girl.

    1. Aizat

      Hey, no one can withstand the lure of cupcakes.

  11. RaijinK

    Amazi-Girl could really use that motherboard for her crime lab, but it’s the cupcakes that are proven invaluable in subduing villains.

    1. RobHagen

      “I would’ve gotten away with it too, if it hadn’t been for Amazi-girl and her Cupcakes!”

      1. Mkvenner

        Bouncy cupcakes.

        1. Aizat

          Big, bouncy cupcakes. 🙂

      2. Roborat

        Cupcakes? is that what you kids are calling them these days? What’s wrong with bazongas, or sweater puppies? You kids and your slang.

    2. Wack'd

      They’re more effective than Hostess fruit pies!

  12. Jon P

    Cupcakes are a damn fine second place.

    1. Raibean

      The gravatar makes this sound far more defensive than it is.

  13. DanielleM

    This is officially my favorite pairing.

    Also $20 worth of cupcakes would be like…3 dozen wouldn’t it?

    That’s a lot of cupcakes.

    1. John

      Amber/Cupcakes, you mean?

      1. Yotomoe

        They’re going to have a threesome with Danny/Soda

      2. Plasma Mongoose

        Coupled with the original DoA OTP Walky/McNuggets, the only conclusion I can think of is that food will be your best love.

    2. Jon P

      Ha! There’s a wave of “gourmet” cupcake places in my area, where each one is like $3.

  14. Doctor_Who

    Who doesn’t like cupcakes? No one, that’s who. They are cakes in a more convenient form you don’t need a fork or plate to consume. Genius.

    1. Yotomoe

      If you’ve got a problem with cupcakes, you’ve got a problem with me.

    2. DanielleM

      Okay it’s been decided. This weekend I am making cupcakes. TRY AND STOP ME!

      1. Doctor_Who

        Judging from your gravatar, that would be futile.

        GALASSO’S PIZZA (AND SUBS) (also cupcakes) cannot be stopped.

  15. Mkvenner

    But it can only power one tenth of the NSA.

  16. Geegles

    The blonde guy sitting behind Danny’s eyes/glasses are freaking me out

    1. Yotomoe

      He learned too much about programing and reached nirvana.

      1. Wack'd

        You mean Nerdvana?

        1. Wack'd

          I’m sorry, that was awful. Here’s me pushing the joke too far to compensate.

    2. Regalli

      *Scrolls up and looks* Holy shit that is terrifying. Thank you in advance for all the nightmares I’ll be having soon.

    3. John

      It’s the other guy that’s weirding me out. His expression reminds me of Walky’s freaked-out-by-Dorothy expression. I’m assuming he’s lovestruck by Amber, but doesn’t know how to approach her, because he doesn’t have a toy monkeyape to throw at her head.

  17. Samantha Hughes

    Danny will find the one obscure food Amazi-Girl is allergic to, bake her cupcakes containing said food, and set off the smoke detectors in the community kitchen while making them. Then accompany Amazi-Girl to the ER because she ate the smoky burnt cupcakes to be nice and had an allergic reaction.

    1. Rognik

      However, that does seem like a brilliant plan to learn her true identity. Should’ve thought of that sooner.

    2. Rognik

      The entire day, and no one points out that if Danny brought cupcakes, Amazigirl might literally be eating out of his hands? FOR SHAME!

  18. Sir Robin

    Amber is making a lot of assumptions about Amazi-Girl …

    1. Yotomoe

      Besides being lumped together and generalized about, it’s the one thing women hate the most.

    2. GeekRyuu

      But I gotta agree with Amber here…cupcakes are pretty frickin’ rad.

      1. Sir Robin

        I want nothing to do with Pinkie Pie’s cupcakes

        1. Absolom

          Brave Sir Robin ran away
          Bravely ran away away
          When Pinkie raised IT’s ugly head
          He bravely turned his tail and fled…

          I would too though…unless they were Red Velvet with cream cheese icing. Then I would stab someone for them.

        2. Sir Robin

          Never accept the invitation when Pinkie Pie invites you to come make cupcakes

  19. Aizat

    Wait, Amber wanted something that could power the Pentagon. What is she really after?

    1. Yotomoe

      That would be the perfect location for “Amazi-girl’s hall of Justice:” ™

      1. Aizat

        I would rather having it ON THE MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON! I’m sorry, that will be the last time I will ever do that.

        1. Boom

          Far more sensible would be one of the ‘quiet spots’. L2 is a good spot, and it has the advantage of being hidden from the direct observation if you’re on the Earth. Totes fucked if you’re ever into it deep with space aliens, fo rizzle.

        2. Boom

          I’m an idiot that can’t read. Ignore! Ignore!

  20. Raine

    Getting advice from Amber about Amazi-girl. This can only end well.

  21. ZuiyoMaru

    Ah, the poor person dating problem. I’ve been there, my friend. I’ve been there.

  22. AckAckAck

    Don’t push your luck Amber. Amazi-Girl doesn’t date Richie Rich ya know.

    Right?

    1. Boom

      Yeah. She should be more careful. This could spiral out of control and send the poor boy headlong into a life of crime… and… I actually like this. Continue on, Amber.

      1. AckAckAck

        It will be like Batman and Catwoman. But this one is between amazi-Girl and Danny-O.

  23. Aizat

    Good thing no one mentioned “that” before.

    1. Yotomoe

      You sound like an anime dancing around mentioning some new special move or power up.

      1. Aizat

        Hey, thanks.

  24. Kurai Seraphim

    I like how this Amber is doing exactly what Amber|Prime did when she got Faz to buy her a computer, only she’s speaking directly for Amazigirl rather than slipping notes into strategy books.

    Here’s hoping Danny goes to Gigi’s for the cupcakes.

  25. Ragnal

    CUPCAKES
    SO SWEET AND TASTY
    CUPCAKES
    DON’T BE TOO HASTY
    CUPCAKES
    CUPCAKES! CUPCAKES! CUPCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKES!

    …I apologize. BUT IT COULDA BEEN WORSE!

    1. Simian Bros

      Now, where ah those cupcakes? Ah’m ready t’ chow down!

      1. Azumango

        …I think our gravatars might be opposites.

    2. GeekRyuu

      …not muffins?

  26. DanielleM

    So this comic gave me a craving. But it’s past midnight and I have no cake mix I do however apparently have half a can of chocolate frosting.

    It’s half as good.

    1. Wack'd

      Wait, people eat cupcakes for reasons beyond the frosting?

      1. Yotomoe

        I eat them in one bite.

  27. Uniqueantique

    Damn! after midnite and no cupcakes…sigh. well, I will just have to wait until tomorrow. By then I will not crave them. No calories for me. However, I will have cupcakes anyway. So that when midnight rolls around again…I will eat them.

  28. Uniqueantique

    and its all your fault.

  29. Thor

    I’m beginning to think that Danny and Amber deserve each other, and I don’t mean that as a good thing.

  30. Boom

    Amber, you are making this so much more difficult than it has to be. Are you even thinking of the end-game?

    1. Boom

      What the fuck. I’m Pamela now? I used to be a ninja turtle until I took a Gravatar to the knee…

  31. Robin

    This reminds me of that storyline near the beginning of Shortpacked, where Amber tricks Faz into buying her a laptop. Why does she do that? I mean, besides all the sweet loot she gets out of it.

  32. Ry

    I appreciate a girl who knows her priorities ^_^

  33. Ry

    *squeee!* Avatar jackpot!

  34. Dibullba

    Yeah. Who in their right mind does not like cupcakes?

    1. Andy

      Me. Everyone always puts fucktons of frosting on them, and I hate frosting. Therefore, cupcakes are usually inedible for me.

  35. Darkflame

    Is that a real mobo? I could do with more Ram…AE and 3DS max eat it like anything.
    Fortunately my cupcake supply is fine.

    1. DK1105

      Doubtful but I know what you mean. Working with Max and Unity open at the same time can be painful. I just doubled my RAM and it helped a lot though.

      1. Darkflame

        I googled it, sadly it isn’t. On retrospect the name is crazy….but then, most of them are anyway.
        I might need to get a serverboard googleing around – nothing could power the pentagon these days. 4 max on most.

  36. Jackson

    Man. I’m going to need more Danny density jokes.

  37. Notebooked

    I expect 70’s Superman comic-book-style hijinks! Amber and Danny eventually schedule a lunch meeting, on the same evening that Amazi-Girl and Danny have a date! Meanwhile, the Congresswoman is smashing up the campus! Will she choose boyfriend or battle? Romance or right? Justice or jayjayplaying? In next week’s thrilling Amazi-Girl — “A Date With Death”!

    (I wondered a while back if, since Amazi-Girl is now a slightly more conventional superhero, she has an archnemesis or supervillain. Sydney Yus seemed the most viable candidate. Faz came in at a close second.)

  38. Random832

    GUYS!

    I think we’ve all been wrong about who Amazi-girl is.

    I think it might be Amber – this arc seems to be hinting at it. Yeah, yeah, blasphemy, I know. Still, it’s only a _little_ bit of a crazy theory.

    1. Raoullefere

      You’re really reaching for it, you know? Although I admit it does appear Joe may’ve designed his supersuit based on a girl who looks startlingly like Amber, to think that Amber is Amazi-girl is just crazy talk.

  39. Mal

    Amber being Amazi-Girl seems to easy, now. Plus, some of the stuff we’ve seen Amazi-Girl do more than suggests [i]actual[/i] superpowers, which I just don’t think Amber has.

    I’m starting to think that Amazi-Girl is android, or something that looks like Amber, because Amber built her.

    1. Mal

      Guess I should have used a real HTML tag, instead of a BBS one.

    2. Kintrex

      I thought Amazi-Girl was Sal

      1. Knight3607

        You have paid no attention to anything…

      2. madd

        No, no, no Amber is SpiderCar.

  40. Raibean

    Amber is a woman after mine own heart.

  41. Bill M.

    Amber has used one of George Carlin’s seven words, I am turned on like you won’t believe.

    1. James

      cotton balls?

  42. LtSaraD

    with iceing to match her costume.

    1. Maycroft

      And the taste of JUSTICE to satisfy her hunger.

  43. Sir Robin

    ..

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