354

Ensnared
Posted on September 30, 2013 by David M Willis

354 thoughts on “Ensnared”

  1. Jen Aside

    Mike always knows what to say to make everything better…

    =B

    1. Dorky

      don’t blame mike, we were all thinking it. he just said it.

      1. Cliff

        To be fair, I wasn’t thinking that Amber was being like her dad. Just because someone’s nice, doesn’t mean they’re a pushover. And I mean, Danny just told Amber to fuck off (in nicer terms) Not very pushover like behavior.

        1. Shadow12000

          This post is fairly weird considering your gravatar…

        2. Foxhack

          He’s obviously drunk.

        3. Paul

          But there’s no blush… Where’s the blush?!?!?

        4. Elva Rodríguez

          He’s just tipsy, needs more vodka

        5. Cthulhu21

          As far as I’ve seen in the momments people have been drunk in this comic the indicator for drunkenness were bubbles and swirls over their heads. Just saying.

        6. Yotomoe

          But what she liked about him WAS that he was a pushover. Him not being a pushover in this particular instance doesn’t change that.

        7. Zach

          You have no supporting evidence.

          Why do you believe she is attracted to pushovers?

        8. Norj

          She’s dated Ethan and Danny.

        9. Zach

          Is Ethan a pushover in this universe? I don’t see it. He has been manipulative.

        10. insomniac

          The dude is re-closeting himself to make his mom happy.

        11. Kennerly

          Well, according to Ethan’s mom, he’s such a pushover Amber managed to trick him into believing he’s gay.

        12. begbert2

          Ethan is re-closeting himself to make himself happy. Because Mike said that was a good approach, and Mike would never lead you wrong ever.

        13. Ourorboros

          Ethan wasn’t up front to Joyce about being gay. He only admitted it because Mike and Amber pushed him.
          But his motive in re-closeting was to regain his old life and control. Also the possibility of a happy life as defined by society.

          Which is a bit odd considering how may gay and lesbians would be on a typical Big 10 campus and being just south of Indiana’s largest city.
          But then we haven’t seen the characters go beyond the dorms, classes, Target (twice), and Galassco’s (sp?). So maybe Ethan doesn’t know.

        14. Ourorboros

          Amber did say she fought Ethan’s parents on his behalf.
          It should have been him.

        15. RevenantBacon

          Yeah, but Ethan’s mom is almost HALF AS MUCH of a douche as Amber’s dad.

        16. Jen

          Cliff, I don’t think it’s just Danny and Ethan that Mike is referring to, but also Amber’s violent tendencies. A lot of people who have been abused turn into abusers themselves. For all of Mike’s jerky attributes, he does seem to really notice things about other people — he may know about Amber punching her dad; he may have figured out the Amazigirl thing; and it’s likely that there are telling signs in the way she tends to deal with anger. That, coupled with the Danny and Ethan thing could point to Amber being a potential abuser.

        17. keltor

          This is exactly how I read it (and honestly is exactly how I’ve seen it work in R/L.)

        18. Ourorboros

          Ethan figured out Amazi-Girl – he said he read the paper so he knew how Amber was decompressing from the summer.
          Stands to reason that Mike figured it out.
          From archive diving, it seems that 90% of what Mike says is for the betterment of others. Having Amber confront this issue is probably best for her.

    2. mrman643

      He didn’t make it better but he sure as hell wasn’t wrong

      1. HiEv

        He made it obvious, which is the first step towards making it better.

  2. VizardJeffhog

    OOOOOOOOOOOOH!

    1. Doctor_Who

      Ooooooooooh

      1. Doctor_Who

        Dangit. My html didn’t work.

        Trying again.

        1. Zach

          What is that? It looks like a PlayStation game.

        2. Gosei

          Puss in boots.

        3. Zach

          ? Puss In Boots is an orange tabby. That wasn’t him. it was too skinny from what I saw in Shrek #2

        4. Doctor_Who

          It’s from Puss in Boots own movie. A running gag (which became a meme) is that whenever something sorta naughty happens, this background cat would pull that face and go “Ooooohh!”

          It’s…funnier than it sounds out of context.

        5. Zach

          Reality needs more tells. I never know what it’s thinking.

    2. Matt

      I believe you mean UH OH

  3. Vivvav

    This feels like a load of bullshit. I realize that Mike is supposed to be the uncomfortable truths guy, but just once I’d like to see him be wrong.

    1. Demon-Something

      Yeah, the more of a memetic badass a character becomes, the more annoying they get. (Especially Ron Swanson. I went there.)

      1. Historyman68

        Mike’s telling her that if she likes him *because* he’s a pushover, it’s the wrong reason. Doesn’t mean that there aren’t other, better reasons for them to be together.

    2. Mkvenner

      He left Faz alive.

      1. tahrey

        I don’t think he’s met Faz yet, but in any case, he WOULD let him live JUST to be a jerk.

    3. Yotomoe

      Mike is never wrong. He simply plants seeds of doubt which grow into trees of doubt and then he eats the apples of doubt.

      1. AgentKeen

        No, first he must turn the apples of doubt into the mush of doubt. Then he adds the yeast of doubt to the mush of doubt and, eventually, the mush of doubt can become the cider of doubt. Then he drinks it, and turns it to the pee of doubt.

        I’ll let you guys figure out what he metaphorically does with that.

        1. The Candyman

          Pours it into a cup and tells Walky it’s lemon juice?

        2. Zach

          Like hell! Drunk mike would only pee in a cup because he’s drunk and want’s to conserve water.

          Also, to Mike it is a cider or apologies.

        3. The Candyman

          There’s non alcoholic cider.

        4. Kerin

          Mike bought some non-alcoholic cider. From your mom.

          For a nickel.

        5. Andrusi

          He takes it, right?

      2. nekobawt

        i thought the tree of doubt grows golden apples.

        because, you know, chaos/discordian something something.

        hail eris?

    4. David Herbert

      The thing is, Mike has incomplete information. Danny can stand up for himself, he’s not exactly weak-willed. Hopefully tomorrow Amber will point that out.

      1. timemonkey

        Danny has never been shown standing up for himself to a love interest.

        1. Reynard-Miri

          Wait, does Amber not count as a love interest?

        2. timemonkey

          No, because he’s not dating her, he’s dating Amazi-Girl. As he doesn’t know they’re the same people he treats them differently.

        3. begbert2

          Except that half the reason he dumped her is because she’s a love interest – he’s interested in her romantically. He just happens to be taken.

        4. timemonkey

          Still not the same. He likes her but they’re not involved and still different.

        5. Andrusi

          They don’t have to be involved for her to qualify as a “love interest.”

        6. begbert2

          Andrusi is brilliant, because he just pointed out that by your definition, the love interest of most romantic movies isn’t one until literally the last ten seconds. They haven’t kissed yet? She’s just a bystander.

    5. JustDucky

      Exactly. He’s gas lighting her here. We have not seen her use violence or the threat of violence to control Danny. So it stands to reason that the reason she likes “pushovers” is that she doesn’t feel threatened by them. And feeling safe with her intimate partner is a priority for her.

      1. Jon P

        But she has inappropriately used violence or the threat of violence elsewhere. And she under-her-breath admits that she was about to go off on Mike, victim of a short fuse that she just maybe inherited from dear ol’ Dad.

      2. vsophi

        No, but as others have pointed out, she actively commits violent acts to deal with her issues. Y’know, as Amazi-Girl. If Ethan knows what’s she’s doing, Mike does too. What he’s saying here, regardless of how much he knows about her and Danny’s relationship (which we can all safely assume is nothing), is not that much of stretch.

    6. wynne

      I don’t know how familiar you are with Shortpacked, but there might be more going on with Mike here. There are certain times he bends the truth.

      1. JustDucky

        I read it, yes. But saying “Mike will be Mike” doesn’t really change anything. =/ And I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but a lot of people are saying that he’s right. And he’s not. An abuse victim who is only intimate with people she feels safe with is not, in fact, an abuser by default. Nor is that extra watchfulness the same as believing that she is doomed to wind up in the same situation again. It is, instead, taking steps to ensure she doesn’t.

        Besides, this Mike is just a college kid. He’s never been abducted by aliens or brought back from the dead etc..

        1. JustDucky

          Akk! Sorry wynne. Reading this on my phone and thought you were replying to me. ×-×’

        2. Jen

          JustDucky, no she hasn’t been physically abusive with Danny, but she having a relationship with him as Amazigirl, but not telling him who she really is seems pretty unhealthy and manipulative to me. Also, she deals with other situations with violence and over-the-top outbursts of anger. She may not be an abuser currently, but she does need to be careful because that’s how she was “taught” to deal with things when she was growing up and it would be really easy for her to slip into that role.

          Amber is at a crossroads. We can only hope she doesn’t follow her father.

        3. BardOfPrey

          Remember, though, Danny specifically asked Amazi-Girl not to tell him who she really is. Not disagreeing otherwise, though.

        4. timemonkey

          She wasn’t just with him though, she was manipulating him. That’s not good. It’s okay to look for a guy who isn’t like your abusive asshole of a father, it’s not okay to then take advantage of them.

        5. Andiemus

          No, but one who solves their problems with violence and gets people to stay with them by deception and manipulation certainly are.

        6. cmglothlin

          A victim of abuse generally may not become an abuser, but children raised seeing abuse in the home are more likely to think it’s an acceptable form of conflict resolution. Especially since it might seem like the only way solve the problem. Even if that’s not Amber’s case, gurl seriously needs to talk to a therapist. Usually universities provide some sort of mental health counseling, often free for students.

    7. saltchocolate

      I don’t think he’s gaslighting her or bending the truth. Someone way downstream said — and I agree — that Mike is only trying to push her to see the basic fallacies of her thinking: the destiny fallacy and the gender fallacy. He said “If you really are doomed to follow your parents’ pattern” — the key word being “if.” Amber is no Blaine (contrary to what some others are posting), but if she’s more like one of her parents than the other, that one would have to be Blaine. She doesn’t have to be like either of her parents — that’s what free will and therapy are for — but which one of them she might take after isn’t determined by gender. After all, Amber herself believes that she is in some danger of being like her dad. Thus, Amazi-girl.

    8. Kateastrophe

      I think Mike’s uncomfortable truths are sometimes meant as course-correction. If Amber has that warning from Mike, and the desire to prove him wrong, she may watch herself for abusive tendencies and get a handle on it before it ever becomes a problem.

      …Or Mike could just be an asshole trying to hurt her. That’s a distinct possibility.

      1. Reepicheep-chan

        Or Mike could just be saying terrible things to get people to stop unburdening to him all the time.

        1. isitsevenyet

          Augh that reply to my comment was meant to reply to you… in case it gets lost in thread confusion… if Mike didn’t want Amber to unburden on him, he shouldn’t have asked her what was wrong.

    9. isitsevenyet

      I’m in agreement with you, here. Mine reminds me of someone I know/knew IRL (haven’t talked to him in literally months and there are good reasons for that). And I have a similar past to Amber. Pointing out truth to help someone is one thing, but there’s no need to be a jerk about it. Being a jerk about it just makes someone who has been abused in the past see you as nothing more than another abuser.

      1. isitsevenyet

        Then perhaps he shouldn’t have asked Amber what was wrong?

    10. Ourorboros

      It isn’t complete bull.
      Amazi-girl admitted that she was a role to compartmentalize and explore her dark side.
      Danny’s initial ambition of riding Dorothy’s coattails, then be AG’s Lois Lane is completely passive. Danny’s father’s advice to stay with Dorothy because she is going places also reflects this.
      Amber, not Ethan, fought Ethan’s parents when he came out.

      So Mike pointed out relative roles. Can I point out that research shows most abusers are actually women? Because abuse is really about emotional control.

      Of course Amber’s view also means she believes birth is destiny. Mike seems to believe otherwise, by his actions. At any rate Amber cannot grow out of her present state without dealing with all of the above.

  4. JebJeb

    Well he does have something of a point.

  5. EvergreenFir

    Worst thing you can do: say someone is like their abusive parent(s)

    1. clodia

      My mom did that to me once! It was fun. That last statement was a lie. I was able to talk with her and mostly help her understand that I was not my dad and that she can actually try to talk to me rather than just hiding emotions until she blows up. Still hurt.

      1. EvergreenFir

        I used to obsess over every little thing I did with my girlfriend back in high school. I’d scrutinize every action, thought, intent to see if it was “like my father”. While he’s a great example of what not to be, it makes it really hard to have a relationship when all you do is worry about being like someone else.

        1. PokeyPuppy

          Oh jeez, my husband does this. Exhausting for me, more exhausting for him!

  6. Lavaticmay

    Shots fired.

    1. Pizzathehutt

      Bang!!

      1. Lavaticmay

        Funny you should say that with Stacy showing up in the last panel.

        1. Keroshino

          In Stacy’s case. Shots “were” Fired.
          Past tense! 😀

  7. clodia

    Mike, you need to be majoring in psychotherapy. You’re a jerk, but you seem to always say the right thing at the right time. Amber needed to hear that.

    1. clodia

      And by right I mean most painful and traumatizing of course.

      1. Yotomoe

        When you can’t get torn down any more, you can do nothing but build from it.

        1. Thasvaddef

          When you can’t get torn down any more, you can do nothing but go insane and possibly run amok through Indiana.

        2. Carlos

          Exceptions: Mike. When Mike is around you can always go lower

        3. Bluebird

          Wait, Mike is Tyler Durden?

    2. Mkvenner

      He probably is major in pyshology.

      1. Yotomoe

        He’s majoring your mom.

        1. Lavaticmay

          That’s good, I hear that class only costs a nickel to get into.

    3. Plasma Mongoose

      People who choose psychology often do so because they have personal issues they are hoping that the course will help deal with. – Psychology Today

      1. timemonkey

        And sometimes we don’t even realise that’s why we’re doing it.

  8. Mkvenner

    At the end of the day everything come up Mike.

  9. Tioras

    Damn, he never lets up!

  10. Luzahn

    Good job help-ruining that situation, Mike.

    1. Yotomoe

      It’s not as if the situation was goin’ fine before Mike.

  11. Cliff

    Goddamn you Mike. Well at least he’s real.

    1. Yotomoe

      He’s Too real for you. He’s too real for all of us.

      1. Cliff

        There’s a reason he’s my avatar. *cue devil horns* Btw, we need to see drunk Mike. STAT.

        1. Luzahn

          And then we realize that the theories that DoA Mike is a jerk to help people are correct, and drunk Mike is the greatest monster imaginable.

        2. Alex Stritar

          You’ll need to wait three years* first, unless you want to encourage underage drinking.

          * 3 years comic time, which will probably be 20 or 30 years real time.

        3. Plasma Mongoose

          This is why this comic needs to be set in Australia where the legal age for drinking is 18.

        4. tahrey

          What, and miss out on all the deeleeshush drama?

        5. Luzahn

          Hey, we need somebody for that now that Billie’s sober.

  12. TheOthin

    Woooooooooah Mike.

  13. HK-A6A7

    Can you feel it?
    It’s da BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURN!

    1. Wack'd

      Very appropriate avatar.

  14. OH_NO_YOU_DI'ENT!

    Mike was about to get punched in the FFFFFFFFAAAAAAAACCCCCCEEEEEEE!!!

    *Ironically confirming his earlier statement….awkwaarrd

  15. Yotomoe

    Beating up Mike will only prove him right.

    1. Lavaticmay

      And that’s how he knows she won’t do it.

      1. Zach

        No, I see nothing wrong with her hitting someone she trusts (they know eachother) who is intentionally hurting her. His history can easily be taken as one of abuse. He talked Ethen into dating a girl after all.

        Looking down, what Omnithea said.

        1. Mr. Random

          Actually, reading everything, he was guilting Ethan to do the opposite every step of the way, and when he wasn’t he was pretty much showing him how big of an ass he was being. He just did it in his own…special way.

        2. Zach

          Subtle use of reverse psychology can be interpreted in many ways. I’ll go back and reread….

        3. Valdrax

          That is why in the very next strip after he sarcastically suggests that Ethan should’ve have stayed in the closet, where Ethan decides to take up Joyce on the offer of going to church, he just says, “…Wow,” with a “I can’t believe you just did that” look on his face.

        4. vsophi

          I feel kind of bad, because I think my ignorant comment yesterday may have something to do with this. orz

        5. timemonkey

          No, Ethan talked Ethan into dating a girl.

        6. Jen

          Zach, I’d have to disagree. Unless they hit you first and it’s self defense, I don’t think it’s ever okay to hit someone.

        7. Ragnal

          I was a little confused by this, but I think I get what Mike was going for now.

          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2012/comic/book-2/02-choosing-my-religion/lincoln/

          He wasn’t telling Ethan to go back in the closet, just the opposite. In Mike’s special way, he was telling Ethan “is it really worth being unhappy just so you can be something you aren’t?” But Ethan being Ethan, he took Mike’s words too seriously, and decided to do just that.

          Every comic afterwords is Mike being that opera-singing person JD wanted in his life on Scrubs.

          In other words, “Miiiiiiiiisss-TAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!”

  16. Omnithea

    That was hurtful, not insightful. Put the boots to him, medium style. He’s resilient, the friendship will survive. Hopefully a lesson will be learned.

    1. Yotomoe

      Mike, being hurtful? Noooooo.
      (Doesn’t make him not insightful though)

      1. Zach

        What is the insight? That Amber must choose between which of her parents she must be? If Mike filed suit, it would be aggravated assault and he could easily be charged with inciting violence.

        I love Mike. I used to say that if I was stuck on an island I would want to be with Hannibal Lector ’cause I’d need a shrink and he’s classy and stable. Now I would pick Mike. This universes Mike is behaving erratically.

        1. Yotomoe

          Amber is violent. It’s implied Ethan knows she’s a vigilante and Mike may know too. He probably knows she’s violent and is just throwing that out there cuz he knows that she will continue down this road until she becomes more and more like her dad. Or at least becomes unpleasant.

        2. Zach

          1. Amber acknowledges Amazagirl is an emotional dumping ground.

          2. What road? No escalation has been seen. Also I take issue with the notion violence is inherently bad outside of immediate self defense.

        3. Yotomoe

          Cool beans. I’m-a go out and punch people then.

        4. Zach

          If someone teases you about being raped within 24 hours of the event, go ahead. No jury will convict.

          Amber is clearly not stable right now. Mike knows Amber well and has apparently super human emotional intelogents besides. He knows how cruel he’s being, even if it IS the right thing to do. Everyone has a breaking point. (That’s right. Even YOU) I have never heard of a parent who didn’t at some point raze their hand in anger as opposed to discipline, for instance. Until we can clearly define where we all accept that breaking point is I think we should lay off Amber.

        5. vsophi

          So because she realizes it’s a problem, she doesn’t have to deal with the problem?

          Also, when is violence (outside of self-defense) ever a good thing?

        6. begbert2

          Football, rugby, wrestling, hockey, karate, kendo…

        7. vsophi

          That is most definitely not the context Zach was talking in. Also, I hesitate to call those things violence. Sport is not inherently violent.

        8. Jen

          Yeah, begbert2, I think vsophi is right. In an earlier post, Zach says, “No, I see nothing wrong with her hitting someone she trusts (they know eachother) who is intentionally hurting her.” I really dislike this statement. It sounds to much like when abusers say, “S/he made me hit her/him” and “Baby, why do you got to do that, you know it drives me crazy. If you would just stop nagging me, I wouldn’t blow up and hurt you.”

        9. begbert2

          I can see disputes about hockey (since the fights aren’t the actual point), but the others? Should I have mentioned boxing? Since when does a fight stop being violent just because somebody’s betting on it?

          I’m not saying I like that particular comment of Zach’s either, mostly because it’s weird (why should it matter if she trusts him?) but it was in a different comment branch! This comment branch is “I take issue with the notion violence is inherently bad outside of immediate self defense.” I don’t feel obligated to assume that ever comment made by a person has the same words in it.

          But if I MUST comment about the other comment thread, I do believe that verbal provocation actually is considered a (not ironclad) defense against an assault charge. So legally he’s right; sometimes you can punch somebody for mouthing off at you.

          If I was to comment on Zach’s overall point in this comment thread, it’s that Amazi-girl’s violent tendencies, while violent, do not seem to be the type of self-escalating unprovoked violence that Blaine dishes out. She’s quite a lot more restrained than Batman, even. There’s certainly no reason to think that equating her with Blaine (much less in a ‘either your or your boyfriend has to be Blaine, no exceptions’ way) is a fair comment, and I can certainly see it being (legally) considered provocation if Amber laid him out for it.

        10. vsophi

          Woah, hold up there a second.

          First off, we are clearly operating under definitions of the word “violence”. I lean more towards Wikipedia’s version: “the intentional use of physical force or power, threatened or actual, against oneself, another person, or against a group or community, which either results in or has a high likelihood of resulting in injury, death, psychological harm, maldevelopment, or deprivation” (bolding mine). Arguably, MMA would fit that definition, but I don’t think it really applies in the sense that the goal is not to assert one’s power over someone to make them submit to you, but rather, to compete with them on equal ground.

          As for your other comment, wtf? I have never heard of anyone getting away with assaulting someone simply because they were egging you on. If they were threatening you, that’s a different story. Not sure if that’s what you meant, but… /shrug

        11. begbert2

          Look up ‘provocation’. (The legal term.)

          And the idea that it’s only violent if it does or has a high likelihood of doing harm is a pretty rare notion. I don’t accept it, nor do I think it represents the usual use of the word.

        12. Jen

          I only brought up Zach’s previous comment only because I think it helps clarify the intent/meaning behind his comment in this thread, which was kinda vague. Looking at more than one comment from someone can make it easier to figure out context and intent of other comments, so in this case, I thought it relevant to bring it up in the current thread.

        13. vsophi

          Okay, so we’re agreed on that point.

          Anyway, what’s your definition? Or rather, what do you suppose the typical usage of the term is?

        14. Kateastrophe

          Amazi-Girl may be a good coping mechanism/outlet right now, but it’s a positive feedback loop. She is rewarded for violence with feelings of power and righteousness. It’s not a healthy way to deal with it.

          Mike, on the other hand, has given her incentive to curb her destructive/abusive tendencies – if her goal becomes proving Mike wrong, expressions of violence become Mike “winning”, and she doesn’t want to give him the satisfaction. The way to beat Mike is to examine and control her impulses. I don’t know if Mike intended to do this or just wanted to hurt her, but either way, it’s a result.

  17. Demon-Something

    So…anyone want to go get their hair done like Amber’s mom?

    1. Khantalas

      The whole afterglow style, then?

      1. GrrArg42

        She was just held up… by rope

    2. StClair

      Pretty sure that’s not all that got done.

  18. Wonder Wig

    Whoaaaa… This is going down as one of those times that this comic has blown my mind.

    1. Yotomoe

      Joe’s dad seems to have done the same to Stacy.

      1. Wack'd

        No, his mind.

        1. AgentKeen

          He does have an M.D. in boning, so it may have blown her mind, too.

  19. Lavaticmay

    Wow Stacy, you clean up well for someone who just got whisk away to get Joe’d.

  20. Pizzathehutt

    She got held up alright…. by Joe’s Dad’s penis. 😀

    1. toddtr

      No she ran into Ethan first and he introduced her to his room mate, Jacob

      1. timemonkey

        Then they made a Jacob sandwhich.

  21. Cliff

    Also, anyone else see how Ms. O’malley (sp?) is all sex-tousled up 🙂

    1. Speedball

      At least it was a positive experience for her.

    2. Yotomoe

      yessir. It’s kinda hard to miss.

    3. Thor

      Also, anyone else see that Amber’s mom is wearing glasses? And seems to be humanoid in shape? And appears to be speaking?

  22. Doctor_Who

    So which of Mike’s parents is HE like?

    1. Cliff

      He’s not agreeing with her statement. He’s saying if SHE thinks it’s true, then so on and so forth.

    2. Yotomoe

      He’s like both of them. But they cancled each other out.

      1. Mr. Random

        They inverted in him.

  23. Keroshino

    Saved by the Bel-…err Stacy.

  24. JessWitt

    Mike, that’s such a low blow, even for you.

    1. JessWitt

      Then again, maybe what Mike says will bring Amber and Danny back together.

      1. Yotomoe

        Or tear them apart.

        1. JessWitt

          And then back together again.

        2. Keroshino

          You are Tearing me apart. Yotomoe!

        3. Yotomoe

          Oh, Hi Keroshino!

    2. someguywithakatana

      That’s his job. He isn’t here to make you feel better. Just to tell you what it is. Is it because he’s a jerk? Or because he secretly cares? … It’s because he’s a jerk, but in the great circle of life, he’s still ultimately what you need to hear.

  25. RobHagen

    Love the hovertext!

    And Mike’s words are something to think about, even if I want him to be wrong this time.

  26. Totz the Plaid

    I’m going to go out on a limb and say that Mike knows he’s not correct here, but he knew that going for an extreme would make it more likely for Amber to take a good hard look at herself and face her _actual_ flaws.

    1. Totz the Plaid

      Then again, final panel Amber does show seeds of Blaine-ish fury, even if hers is far more righteous than his ever was.

      It’s the violence that ties them together.
      Also, their sense of superiority.

      1. Yotomoe

        Righteous is in the eye of the beholder. You can’t really think like that cuz what you think isn’t right isn’t what everyone else does.

    2. JessWitt

      Good point. It’s like when he spoke out about Dorothy and Walky’s relationship in gender studies. It was a douchey thing to do but things worked out in Walky and Dorothy’s favor.

      1. ninja_jesus

        Mike: The relationship fixer.

      2. Raoullefere

        Don’t be so sure about that. I’m fairly sure Mike’s enjoying seeing Mr. Nonconformist conform and conform and conform… right up until Dotty gets her Ivy League ticket and dumps him. Or, (less likely) Dotty dumps all those dreams she’s been pushing herself for to be with Walky and has to accept that she won’t shoot to the stars AND that she didn’t have the stones to tell Danny she simply wasn’t into him back before they graduated high school. Either way, Mike gets to see someone wrecked.

  27. Variaman

    Just get out of here, Mike

    1. EvergreenFir

      perfect avatar for that comment

    2. Keroshino

      MICHAELBERG!

  28. Khantalas

    Come on, now, kiss!

    ((‘kay, I know Stacy just got done doing the deed, but still, she should totally make out with him.))

    1. Lavaticmay

      She’d have to pay a nickel.

      1. Yotomoe

        Mike is actually here to tell Amber he got sloppy seconds.

        1. Gosei

          Now 50% off

        2. Andrusi

          So, two and a half cents?

  29. Fuzzydaemon

    Ouch!! But it is the truth. The cherry on the sundae of an absolutely terrible day. Does Stacy look a little pink around the hairline or is it my imagination?

    1. Yotomoe

      It’s just the way her skin tone is shaded.

    2. Gosei

      It’s the afterglow.

  30. Pureed Madness

    I think this is one of those times Mike’s just a jerk. Not being insightful
    or funny in a jerkish way. Just a plain ol’ jerk.

    Huh.

    1. Totz the Plaid

      Blaine and Amber both seem to find themselves superior to others, though Amber uses that to dispense justice, while Blaine’s just an ass.

      Blaine and Amber both have a penchant for violence, though, again, Amber attempts to use hers for good rather than evil.

      There’s some insight in Mike’s comments, even if it’s exaggerated.

      1. Yotomoe

        Sometimes you gotta go to extremes to make something more noticable.

        1. Mr. Random

          Sooner or later Amber’s gotta realize she doesn’t have to be her mom or her dad. She can be a fusion of their better qualities. You know, like she has some of both of them in her.

        2. John

          If Blaine has any better qualities, he keeps them well-hidden.

        3. Mr. Random

          He’s not afraid to be himself. His horrible, horrible self. Think, Emperor’s New Groove. Some lessons are learned out of order. If you learn to be yourself before you learn to always be kind, it kinda gets… Messy.

    2. timemonkey

      Hardly, he said it in a dickish way, of course, but it’s something she needed to realise. She purposely sought out a man who wasn’t assertive and then started manipulating him. The first is an okay thing, the second not so much. She needs to be made aware of a potential pattern before it becomes a problem.

      1. Valdrax

        That’s a bit of a twist of what actually happened.

        Danny expressed attraction to her first, only four days after he broke up with Dorothy. He flirted with her first, and there was a brief roadbump when Billie interviewed him in his room (with his shirt off), but Amber decided to reciprocate his feelings. Unfortunately, that was right when Danny decided the similarity between her and Dorothy might make her a rebound and decided to focus his attention on Amazi-Girl as someone a bit more different. Grumpily, Amber decided to roll with it, because she did like him.

        She neither sought out a doormat (though she has coincidentally found herself attracted to two of them), nor did she actively set out to manipulate him so much as fall into it, and she’s been very unhappy about the situation ever since.

        (I think Mike’s comment has a ring of truth to it, but she’s not a monster.)

  31. Taara

    I find this an interesting reversal of Shortpacked! Mike’s conversation with Amber.

  32. Bloody_Jerk

    Well, she were afraid of being like him and now someone told her, she is on the best way to be like him.
    The first thought and the simple answers are mostly likely the ones, which are right, so… yeah, Mike may fucked everyones mom for a nickel, but at least he never lied to one of them.

    1. Zach

      A penchant for violence was never Blane’s problem. His selfish need for control, his total disregard for others, and his love of cruelty where his flaws.

      1. Jim

        Amber dresses up in a costume to assume authority she doesn’t have and wanders around a campus assaulting people and threatening them with physical violence for things like petty vandalism.

        She’s also two-timing her desired boyfriend with herself, and intentionally forced him into a situation he’d explicitly told her he didn’t want by threatening him with public shame. When someone was in actual physical danger from date-rape, she wandered off to put on a costume instead of immediately stepping in like a normal person.

        She’s actually one-upped her father pretty well on all three of your points so far, at least as far as on-screen behavior goes. Though, obviously she’s a stupid teenager and a core cast member, so there’s potential that her arc will change that. Hopefully.

        1. vsophi

          re: Amber leaving the party to go suit up…

          This is not the kind of party Amber would normally attend. It’s far more likely someone said something like “omfg there was a fight” on Facebook or Twitter and she saw it.

        2. Mr. Random

          She was there Already in costume, beating up the guys that were beating up Danny in the first storyline. She just sorta, popped over once she saw what was going on.

        3. John

          Amber was visible out of costume just before she made her appearance as Amazi-Girl.

          Before that, Amazi-Girl was involved in a background fight against, I think, one of the guys she saved Danny from before, who showed up a little earlier. I’m beginning to suspect that Amber was at the party because she was stalking those guys looking for an excuse to beat them up again.

        4. vsophi

          Oh my god, I didn’t even notice that.

          Jeez, I am really off my game with the DoA archives.

        5. Bloody_Jerk

          It’s just kinda my opinion but, not only she could inherited part of his character (or arcquired it, by learning that’s a way to life and still using it for her kind of judgement), but also, if Blane has a mental disorder(such as narcism), she most likely inherited or arquired that, too.
          It’s proved, that people, with a mental disorder not only can transfer it to people close to them, but also to their children. Sometimes, it’s stuck in their head since birth and you can’t realy cure it, sometimes they learned that kind of behaviour and you can cure it with a therapy.

        6. Zach

          She threatened him with public shame by…saving him from that public shame? There relationship has been her flirting with him and he the. Turning her down. Also, manipulative=\=bad. Parents, teachers, and yes sometimes friends should be manipulating.

          Changing at the party WAS questionable, but for all we know, she changed after gaukking with everyone else. We don’t know what she was doing.

          As for violence, she is NOT doing what you just said. Remember when she just stole the stop sign? She has not exceded her authority as a citizen. If I catch you dumping your grease into a pond you can bet your ass there will be a problem. Ditto for intervining in violence if I think it will do any good.

  33. Bilfred

    Mike vs. Amber: fight of the century

    1. Yotomoe

      Mike wouldn’t use his fists. He would just say things that would cut her like a knife.

      1. Gosei

        She, however, would use a knife.

        1. Norj

          You don’t bring a knife to a Mike fight.

        2. Bilfred

          Yeah, in fact you don’t bring any sharp instruments to a Mike fight. He’ll just convince you to stab yourself with them.

        3. Yotomoe

          He’ll make the knife feel bad about itself and it won’t feel like stabbing anymore.

  34. MM

    That last line is not really helping your case, Amber.

    1. Raoullefere

      Might help Mike’s dentist, though.

  35. JessWitt

    Mike reminds me of a muse from Wonderfalls – agitating but enlightening.

  36. Ali

    Does Mike know how awful and abusive her dad is?

    1. Tristan B.

      Probly but he just wants her to know exactly what she’s gotten herself into

  37. AgentKeen

    You’re right, Mike, she should find a nice, emotionally manipulative asshole to settle down with; know where she can find one?

    -wanders off, whistling to self-

    1. Yotomoe

      That’s….not Mike’s point at all.

      1. AHR

        No, the joke is that in shortpacked, Amber and Mike are a canon couple.

        1. Yotomoe

          oopsie. I’m a little off lately, eh.

  38. milk experiment

    Current theory: this universe’s Mike (and the previous one’s?) are assholes because they see other people so very clearly and have little patience for the games they play with themselves.

    1. milk experiment

      I take it back: that’s not why he’s an asshole, just the way his assholishness expresses itself. A kind and compassionate person who saw others and their self-delusions with piercing clarity would go about things very differently.

  39. Gram91

    Mike logic…shit

    1. Gram91

      Just realized that I should have put something like dang instead so as to not confuse people and show that I mean woooooowwwwww.

  40. Tom T.

    I said it a few days ago — Amber is the Ravager to Blaine’s Deathstroke. Except instead of poking out her own eye, maybe she’ll bloody her own nose.

  41. EvergreenFir

    Damn it Willis! I thought to myself “I forgot to check the alt-text”, reread the comic and thought “yeah, held up against a wall…” and then read the alt-text.

    GET OUT OF MY HEAD!

  42. linkotd

    Oh man please don’t do another “amber falls for mike” thing. Amber is great and deserves someone who is not…mike. Mike deserves to have something up his ass. unlubed and sideways at that.

    1. Bill

      I’m Bill, and I approve the above post.

    2. Thor

      So far DW has done exactly two canon couplings from the Walkyverse, and those are okay because (a) they didn’t have much chance to be fully explored, and (b) they are lots of conflict-filled fun.

      1. vsophi

        That’d be Sal/Jason and Billie/Ruth, right?

      2. kelticat

        You might want to add Dorothy/Walky to the couple mix, since she was a ex-girlfriend in walkyverse.

  43. Bill

    Mike, that’s got to be the most douche-bag comment you could have made at this time.  It may be a truth (although I doubt it), but at a time like this Amber doesn’t need to hear it.  It’s like treating a drunk who has hurt himself; you treat the injuries and patch up the damages and save the temperance lecture about the evils of alcohol for later.

    1. Bilfred

      Perfect analogy. Then again, Mike is excellent at finding important problems that nobody else notices.

      He’ll be a great engineer someday.

  44. Kernanator

    Oh Mike, you tell the sweetest bedtime stories!

  45. Superglucose

    My jaw dropped at how much of an asshole he was right there. Like holy hell.

  46. Gosei

    Mike, tellin’ it like it is.

  47. AskSopek

    Mike does have a point.

  48. All Else Fails

    Maybe it’s time, Amber, that you turned to the other side. You know. The homosexual/bisexual side.

    On Topic: I’m pretty sure that Amber hitting Mike would give him a reason to punch her in the fffffffffaaaaaaaaaaaacccccccccccceeeeeeeeee.

    1. John

      I suspect that if Amber were to actually take a swing at Mike, he’d just stand there and take it for as long as she was willing to dish it out. Which would prove his point, and hurt her far more than hitting her back.

    2. John

      And I think this section of the comments needs more Yelling Billie.

  49. Gottawonder

    A kind and compassionate person who saw others clearly, would not stay kind and compassionate for very long.

    Mike told her to stop being a jerk, and no one likes to hear that, especially if it is true. We know why she is acting this way, Willis is a genius with relationships and characters.

    A psych would spend years telling her things to boost her self-esteem. Mike saves her a lot of time and money in one easy sentence.

    I think he does care, I think as has been said, he just sees people and their stupid actions clearly and has set himself up to deflate them whenever the urge strikes.

    And drunk Mike would do her no good at all, he is so stinking nice you can’t stand him.

    1. Zach

      Just give him 1 beer. He will be perfect!

    2. Mr. Random

      I don’t remember who said it but someone stated that most assholes enforce themselves and their standards on everyone, but what sets Mike apart is that he enforces OTHER people’s logic and standards on themselves. He forces people to reexamine themselves. Eventually Amber would realize she’s not her mother, but more like her father. Then she’d have a bit of a breakdown. This way, Mike shows how ludicrous the thought that she has to, HAS to, be like one of her parents is. She can be like neither of them. Or she can be like both. The better parts of both.

      1. Thor

        +1

      2. saltchocolate

        I said the same thing upstream! Totally agreed. (Great minds . . . )

      3. John

        That was me, I think.

        1. Mr. Random

          Yep, credit where it’s due.

    3. Historyman68

      Not all psychiatrists would tell her stuff to boost her self-esteem for years.

  50. Mort

    Dude’s got a point

  51. DiDi

    I’m gonna focus on something else entirely…

    Is Amber’s mom’s hair mussed? I know what she was obviously up to being seduced and all but I guess I wanted to see whether she would make her appearance exactly as it was or if there will be a tell…

    1. Bastylos

      Definitely messier when compared to the last time we saw her. At least her top is not inside out?

  52. AlsoSprachOdin

    Mike could have argued the “doomed to follow parents’ footsteps” part, but instead he chooses to insult. Because he’s a one-note, generic asshole. He has no other choices, no other expression.

  53. Mattyos

    Mike is the no holds barred comments guy who will tell it like it is, no matter how much it makes him sound like an asshole. It’s not so much that he’s doing it to be a dick as much as he’s just being brutally honest which for those who are on the other end of his opinions is very painful to hear.

  54. Hoboturtle

    One hand I’m not completely buying what Mike says, but on the other hand.

    Imagine if this Had happened to someone who wasn’t Mike

    1. Keroshino

      Photo has been removed! 🙁

    2. timemonkey

      Different universe, doesn’t count.

      1. Hoboturtle

        Just saying, violence out burst is part of her character. So far it hasn’t gone bad is because so far she only because she’s been able to constrict it to people who deserve it.

  55. Baker

    Mike just needs to make a case for jerks. Cause he wants to date her. And he’s not willing to change, since ya know, jerk.

  56. Barrage7667

    I. HATE. MIKE.

  57. Hoboturtle

    Wrong link, whoopies,
    http://www.shortpacked.com/index.php?id=1166

    1. saltchocolate

      This makes me want to go back and re-read SP from the beginning again.

      1. saltchocolate

        One more time . . . (Sheesh! How much more redundant can I get?)

  58. Mr. Bulbmin

    Oh, crap.
    How long should I set the “stuff gets fucked up” timer for?
    Three comics? Four?

    1. xKiv

      0.2, usually.

  59. Keroshino

    Ya kno, yesterday I was wanting Danny to get nutpunched by Mike…

    I TAKE THAT BACK! Now I am wanting Mike to be the one getting the nutpunching…From AMBER!!!

    1. Thor

      Amber knows Mike. She should know by now that you do not go to Mike for comfort. You go to Mike for the most uncomfortable of truths.

      1. John

        Or for him to push your thinking down the slippery slope so that you can see exactly where it takes you.

    2. Inarx

      Don’t lie to yourself.
      You just want to see someone get nutpunched. You don’t really care who.

    3. madd

      Why would you want people to get nutpunched for being honest and upfront? I can understand being upset with someone for unloading the unvarnished truth on you, but wanting to see that person hurt just because you don’t want to hear their truth, is just ridiculous.

  60. Rhy

    Dat flavor text. Damn you Willis

  61. Baf

    Mike’s right. Amber would never date a jerk, let alone marry and have children with one! That would just be completely contrary to everything we know about her character.

    1. madd

      heehee

  62. MsSchiff

    Oh, this’ll end well! I love how Amber reacts after the initial shock: She doesn’t wanna deny, she doesn’t wanna argue…

    SHE WANTS TO HIT.

    Mmm. Yeah. I think that ‘A’ on her union suit is gonna stand for ‘Anger’ eventually.

    1. Alex

      She is kind of like her dad, I can see why that comment hurt… it’s just a smidge more socially acceptable for a girl to recreationally punch the “bad” people on campus.

      For everyone who’s familiar with the alterna-verses: Is she ever the villain? She definitely has a two-face vibe, albeit PG-13 :).

      1. KKoro

        kind of? There’s an arc where she kind of buys into a cult, and it pisses Ethan off.

  63. Marisa Mockery

    Heh. I have the same problem as Amber. I didn’t have the most amazing father in the world, and for a really long time I just looked for the opposite of him. Now I’m a little older, and…finding a mate is still fucking tricky. x.x

  64. Cope

    Punch him anyway!

  65. Jenny Creed

    http://i696.photobucket.com/albums/vv324/immortalpictures/relchart.jpg
    Probably of little interest to anyone, but I ended up with this surrealistic screenshot I felt I had to share.
    Apparently Asma is my best friend. Don’t remember if her name has even been mentioned in the comic. She’s a total mystery. An odd thing to say about your best friend.
    And Walky is my enemy. That at least means I can sleep easily.
    For Les to be my first kiss I have to lose my memories in a comical head injury accident. So there’s that to look forward to.
    And Joyce and I are sisters. So I guess it’s up to me to drag her out of that sheltered shell. Whoopee.
    All that is worth is to have Sal have a crush on me, though.
    Except it won’t work out when Mike is my lover. Mike’s invincible, Sal’s unstoppable and I’m in the middle. Well, we had a good run, the world.

    1. Bill

      So what did you have to fill out and where to get something like that?

      1. Jenny Creed

        Oh right, it was this thing Willis posted on Tumblr: http://mokia.tumblr.com/post/62662760744

        1. tahrey

          I can’t even whatever to make the compliation pic, but…:

          Top row: Leslie, Mike, Dina. Sounds reasonable.
          2nd row: Walky, Ethan, Joyce. Wait, what? That took a sudden turn…

    2. Bill

      And for whatever it’s worth, Asma has been in a total of five strips here in DoA; her name has never been used although the name ‘Asma’ appears in the tag listing.

    3. Raen

      What’s interesting to me is the apparently impending introduction of El Marmalade Shive.

      1. tahrey

        …where did THAT come from?! j:-|

  66. azukar

    Man, Mike never pulls punches, does he…

  67. azukar

    Oh dear. Speaking of Mike, I just jumped on Willis’ Tumblr and did the Dumbing of Age friend/crush/sibling/lover thing…

    Mike turned out to be my lover, but ALSO my adopted sibling…

    …

    He set this up deliberately, didn’t he.

    1. Jenny Creed

      Haha, I thought I had it bad with just Mike as a lover. But. . .at least there’s. . .you’re not related by blood. . .I guess? Yaay.

  68. tahrey

    Next strip:
    *Mike makes typical Your Mom comment about Stacy*
    *Amber prepares to kick his ass*
    *Sees Stace blushing in a bashful but amused fashion, as if remembering a silly in-joke*
    *Waves of crushing realisation cross Amber’s face*
    *Momentary anguished pause*
    *Punches Mike anyway*

    Next strip +1:
    EPIC FIGHT SCENE

    1. tahrey

      DAMN IT

  69. Josh

    I WILL PROVE I’M NOT A JERK BY IMPLYING DEADLY VIOLENCE!

  70. Stranger

    Well you were about to resort to violence because the guy pointed out flaws in your logic and you didnt like that, but no no, youre not like your dad AT ALL

  71. Viredae

    I just love how that informs the Mike/Amber relationship in Shortpacked!

  72. AckackAck

    I don’t know why some people hate Mike because of this conversation. I think this convo is to the point it hurt.

    Reminds me of Nudge from Wapsi Square. She always “nudge” people on the right direction and decision even when it’s mentally hurt and painful. She made a few enemies because of that but she still doing it out of good will.

    1. Dave

      Yeah, he may say things in the absolute most jerk way possible, but it’s all a matter to REALLY pay attention to what he’s saying.
      There’s a spanish saying that says “La verdad no peca, pero incomoda”
      translated it’s basically something like: Truth doesn’t sin, but it’s still uncomfortable.

      1. AckackAck

        Yeah, sadly Amber AND Danny is in the same position now. They are in their “safety bubble” and plugging their ears with their fingers and yell “NANANANA I DONT WANNA HEAR YA!”

  73. Fred

    Can someone point me to where Blaine has been abusive to Amber? As far as I can find, he kind of admits to hitting her mother. Amber claims that he cheated on mom too (although that may have been a crowd control tactic), but she DIDN’T says “He hit me.”
    Blaine, BTW, has apparently been divorced and loaded with Child Support payments by a justice system to punish him for his abuse.

    I know other Willisverse comics have Blaine as an ultimate evil monster… but so far he isn’t nearly as bad as Joyce or Ethan’s parents have been.

    1. xain

      I see your point but are you really gonna argue that Ethan and Joyce’s Parents are worse than Blaine? I’m not saying Ethan and Joyce’s Parents arn’t bad but at least there faults are derived from caring about there kids and trying to be good parents(not succeeding but trying).

      On the other hand Blaine abused and cheated on his spouse, abandon his child and then goes out of his way to lorde over her the minimal support he only gave her because the courts forced him to.

      Blaine didn’t try to be a good parent and stumble upon the way he went out of his way to a horrible husband and father and by comparisons the browns and siegals are a breath of fresh air

  74. JoeMerl

    The worst thing about Mike is that the most horrible, nasty things he says often have a point.

  75. TaintedSpud

    Gotta love people hating on Mike and saying Amber’s not as bad as Blaine.

    Sure she’s not. Yet. Do you think Blaine started off an abusive, overbearing asshole? No. He started small. Maybe it was his first girlfriend, maybe it was a few more down the line. But it starts small. A little manipulation here, and a little passive-aggressiveness there, then it snowballs. And Amber is on that exact trajectory.

    Argue all you want about Danny standing up for himself. Yes, Danny stood up to her. But she didn’t expect that. She expected him to drape himself on her and profess his undying love. Judging by her reaction, Danny temporarily growing a pair hadn’t even occurred to her.

    She manipulated Danny. Both as herself AND as Amazi-Girl. And as Amazi-Girl, she already shows the same predisposition for violence Blaine does. Remember, she cites her reason for being Amazi-girl, albeit indirectly, to SETTLE HER OWN PROBLEMS. She’s not doing it for justice, or any sense of moral obligation, but as therapy.

    Now as someone who has his own violent, manipulative side (which I’m dealing with, day by day) what’s the reason someone like that does what they do? To make themselves feel better.

    Mike’s not saying “You are Blaine!” Mike is saying “Watch yourself, if you’re not careful, that is where you’ll end up.”

    Also, why no anger at Stacy? She came to the school to see her daughter, and some generically beige man shows a passing interest, its all “Fuck you Amber, momma’s gonna get her some!” Sure she didn’t know Blaine was there, but her ditching her daughter for a penis is what caused all this to happen to Amber.

    1. Jenny Creed

      Well, Amber’s spent her life being afraid of turning out like her mom. I don’t think it ever occurred to her she might turn out like her dad until Mike pointed it out just now. But now she knows, and that’s probably enough to stop it from happening. Yay Mike, saving the day yet again with his flawless benevolent sadism.

      1. madd

        No … I think it’s occurred to her before, otherwise she wouldn’t have been so thrown at realizing that she enjoyed hitting her father.

      2. Kamino Neko

        She realized it. That’s why she created the Amazi-Girl persona, to compartmentalize it.

      3. AckackAck

        Or she’s in denial. Probably Mike isn’t the first one who talk sense to her.

    2. Jack Finch

      It’s a fair question. It kind of depends on the how you view Blaine. Is he a sociopath/psychopath, or is he socialized to violence.

    3. Jen

      TaintedSpud, interesting point about Amber’s mom. I didn’t even think about that.

    4. madd

      +1

    5. AckackAck

      +1 Great observation.

  76. Norj

    At what point does a person lose redeeming traits and reach Blaine/Ethans’s parents/ Joyce’s parents level of jerkiness.

  77. vsophi

    oh god

    best friend: marcie
    enemy: amber
    first kiss: joyce
    lover: joyce
    has a crush on you: amazi-girl
    adopted sibling: marcie

    I’m… I’m dating Joyce. And I guess Amber has a hatecrush on me.

    why do I have the power to turn people into lesbians

    1. Norj

      Best Friend: Joe
      Enemy: Jason
      First kiss: Dina
      Lover: Amber
      Crush: Marcie
      Sibling: Robin

    2. madd

      Best Friend: Amber
      Enemy: The Dean
      First Kiss: Marcie
      Lover: Dina
      Has A Crush On You: Amazi-Girl
      Adopted Sibling: Mike

    3. Galatine

      Best Friend: Ruth
      Enemy: The Dean
      First Kiss: Ethan
      Lover: Jason
      Crush: Mike
      Adopted Sibling: The Dean

      NEXT TIME I SEE YOU AT THANKSGIVING YOU WILL BE DESTROYED, DEANY.

    4. Alex Stritar

      Best friend: Danny
      Enemy: Walky
      First Kiss: Billie
      Lover: Joyce
      Has a Crush on You: Joe
      Adopted Sibling: Marcie

      I have some real mixed emotions about this.

    5. AskSopek

      Best Friend :Asma
      Enemy: Walky
      First Kiss: Leslie
      Lover: Mike
      Has a crush on you :Sal
      Adopted Sibling : Joyce.

      I-I am surprisingly okay with this, though… I wonder what I did to get Walky to hate me… Steal his nachitos?

      1. madd

        You reached for the last nugget. You are forever his nemesis.

  78. Jimmy

    I don’t buy the notion that just because she’s not like her Mom that means she has to be like her dad. Sure there are some traits each person gets from their parents, but in the end it’s the person who makes their choices and can take a path diverging completely from their parents. Just because she doesn’t take abuse from others doesn’t mean she’s going to be an abuser.

    1. Gordon Blvd

      well, the fact that she was even THINKING of striking/killing Mike …………….solely cause of what he said? Kinda hints that maybe daddy lives in her afterall…………….

      1. Jimmy

        Yes there are traits we do share from our parents, but she didn’t do it. If she was more like her dad, she would have hit Mike even though her mom was there. So she does have some will power, it’s just a matter of harnessing her aggression for good, like she’s trying to do with Amaizigirl

      2. Jimmy

        Also, if you had a father who abused your mother and someone said you were like him, wouldn’t that make you angry enough to think about striking that person too?

  79. Jack Finch

    The operative word here is “IF”. Amber’s got anger management issues but no signs of the narcissism that would make her Blaine. She’s more afraid she’s like him than actually like him.

    1. madd

      If Amber ended up with someone she could walk all over, she could develop that same entitled narcissism you see in Blaine. Most abusive relationships don’t start with violence.

  80. Alexis

    Damn, Mike.

    Damn.

    Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn.

    Why we all talking about Amazigirl when it’s clear this dude is the only person around here with actual superpowers.

    1. PureLionHeart

      Everything this person just said. But more damns. And even more DAYUMs.

      1. Khantalas

        Stacy gets all my DAYUMs in this comic.

  81. joeyo

    Mike is just upset because he’s supposed to get first dibs on all mom-doing activities.

    1. Khantalas

      And what makes you think he wasn’t the first to… “comfort” Stacy after her divorce?

    2. timemonkey

      Oh, joeyo, Mike probably hit that six months ago.

  82. Charles Phipps

    YES! Amber must EMBRACE her dark side! She can stop just pushing around vandals and instead *KILL* them like Rorshach! Give her a tire-iron as her weapon or a chainsaw!

    AMAZI-GIRL! BUCKETS OF BLOOD!

    *pause*
    *ahem*

    Yeah, uh, moving along.

  83. Andiemus

    Yes, Amber. Punch the guy to prove you’re not dangerously violent.

  84. Toes14

    Amber: “Mom, why are you walking funny?”
    Amber’s Mom: “I, uh, worked out this morning for the first time in a long time, and now I’m pretty sore.”

  85. wr3h

    I wouldn’t have minded seeing a Mike vs Amber fight

    They’re both pretty good at punching people.

  86. Twirls

    He’s pointing out that she doesn’t actually have to fall into the traps of being one or the other of her parents.

  87. kam

    to be honest, this is the one thing that a child like amber is terrified of, more than anything. yes, it would be *horrible* to end up like her mother, caught up with an abusive asshole. but it would be so much worse to be like her father, and that is what she is truly scared of. that’s why this hurts so much.

  88. Featherstone

    Huh. I guess thats another reason to likeMike. He was really good for amber in the other series. I guess she was kind of a push over in real life, and amazigirl was the only way she acted brave. But then Mike kind of forced her to deal with things in his own jerky way, i guess. I mean my favorite scene in the other comic is where hes being a jerk to her and she hits him… which that did kind of make her a stronger character…
    May be overthinking it a bit. Just thought it was a good point that she is giving into abusive tendencies. yes shes channeling them a bit better than beating people who care about her, but this is a way more aggressive characterthan she was in the other comic.

  89. Andrew Thomas Giarrusso

    It’s like Willis wants us to hate him.

  90. DragonStryk72

    Okay, so yeah, Mike is a dick, clearly, but then people need to stop going to him with their emotional problems, as he’s clearly the last person he should talk to. He also isn’t always right, like with his advice to Ethan about re-closetting himself.

    Alot of Mike’s advice leads in bad directions, so I don’t get the “he’s the hard truth guy”, cause he’s really the “The fireworks from this could be fun to watch” guy.

    As for Amber, she needs to come clean to Danny about Amazi-girl, and soon. Her violent tendencies generally only come out around her dad at this point, and occasionally Mike, but yeah, it’s Mike so he’s clearly done something to earn it, i.e. every sentence that comes out of his mouth. I’m more worried about how she’s repressing everything bad that happens in her life. That’s never a good thing.

    Danny, on the other hand, is not a pushover, or he would’ve just gone with the flow of things with Amber. It would’ve been only too easy to sit back and not do anything, but he actually put in thought, and looked at the long term consequences.

    1. vsophi

      Ugh, guys, stop using the Ethan thing. I was already proven wrong about that yesterday.

    2. John

      Generally, when Mike’s advice has bad outcomes – which is pretty often – it’s because he’s agreeing with the stupid things his advisee is saying, and often trying to convince them to take it up to 11.

      This maximizes their pain when it hits the fan… and it also tends to push things so far that they know without a doubt how and how badly they were mistaken, in a way that simply telling them that they’re wrong could not possibly get across. And I’m not sure which of these results Mike is actually after. Possibly both. There are almost certainly less hurtful ways to help people, but there are also certainly less helpful ways to hurt people.

  91. Ashley

    Harsh, Mike.
    But something worth sharing with a psychologist.

  92. Ailorn

    Amber needs a therapist. Some things are important enough to talk to a trained person with no ulterior motive.

  93. WikiDreamer

    Ouch…but true. Amber honey, go see a shrink ASAP.

  94. Ess

    Her facial expression even looks just like her father’s.

  95. joeyo

    Mike has a point, and the fact the Amber was about to go all face-punchy on him proves it. She even admitted it after knocking her dad’s teeth in (although he totally deserved that).

    On the other hand, Mike’s advice lead to Ethan’s current situation, so fuck you Mike. I agree with whoever said his moral compass was “chaotic chaotic.”

    1. Robin

      I’d say his moral alignment is “Chaotic asshole”, actually.

    2. Random832

      I am truly baffled at the number of people who think Mike’s “advice” to Ethan was anything other than completely obvious sarcasm that Ethan willfully misinterpreted.

      1. Featherstone

        I’m baffled about that too…

        Course I’m also baffled cause people hate mike cause he’s an asshole. Mike’s an asshole because he wants to be/ thinks its funny/ people have asked him to be; where as everyone else we see being an asshole is because they’ve trampled on other people – usually emotionally but occasionally physically as well – either by accident or willful negligence.

        My point being that no one is close to Mike so he can say what he likes, it doesn’t really hurt half as bad as what the rest of them are pulling…So why hate Mike?

  96. Jack Finch

    Anyone else need Stacy to make up for blowing off Amber on this of all days? How much time is she gonna spend? Is she gonna be available to Amber now? If she shortchanges Amber I think I’m gonna stop liking her.

  97. Nym

    Someone in comments mentioned (a couple days ago? I could probably go back to check, but I know better than to wade through old comments) that one might gain more sympathy for Danny if that person were to re-read only the Danny strips in the archives.

    I come to you having gone through with that proposition and to warn you that no, no, it probably won’t make you more sympathetic. If you are like me, it will probably take your feelings of lukewarm ambivalence and turn them into fiery hatred, such that you henceforth twitch every time you see his stupid, little face spewing stupid, horrible words.

    Which is to say: maybe Danny is or isn’t a character the average person can like, but he is definitely best endured in small doses.

    Anyone have recommendations for other ways to re-read the comic to see if your perspective on something changes?

    1. Bilfred

      read every strip with Mike in it. It will strip away almost all the funny, except for black humor.

  98. Gargamel

    Yes Amber, punch Mike that will prove him wrong.

    1. Timni16

      shush stop being logical.

  99. Darbs

    I know I’m in the rare minority here, but I personally think Mike is doing what he thinks is best for her here. He’s harsh, and he’s an asshole, agreed, but he’s being one for her good. People in downward spirals often need a bit of a shock to drive them out of it, and Mike’s doing a pretty damn good job of making her think about what she’s becoming.

  100. Timni16

    “Help up alright. Against a wall” dAVE. DAVE. YOU CAN’T SAY THINGS LIKE THAT (well technically, you can you are the writer) but sTILL

  101. 0kami

    Well, look at this! Appears Mrs. Warner got there just in the nick of time. What does that make her?

    1. Animaniac

      “Big damn heroes, sir.”

      1. 0kami

        Isn’t she just?

  102. Katie

    Mike is that guy who will put everything into the worst possible version of itself so you get mad and fight him on it, thereby giving yourself clarity. I doubt that his purpose for being an asshole is that noble, but that’s the result.

  103. Trolldrool

    Every time I see Mike’s face in a page it feels like someone is punching me in the head.

    1. Trolldrool

      And now my avatar changed and it’s punching me in the head…

  104. AManWithAPlanDoingThingsInAPlace

    “Sorry, pumpkin, I was held up.” You mean held down…
    OOOOHHHHHHH

  105. nothri

    Knowing what happens in the other universe makes this whole exchange extra fucked up. In a good way.

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