235

Floundering
Posted on August 31, 2019 by David M Willis

this month's patreon bonus strip is about penny, because she was voted for, even though she already had a bonus strip about how we'd seen the last of her, so here's more the last we'll see of penny

also you can pledge to see tomorrow's strip today, if that's a thing you like

235 thoughts on “Floundering”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    I mean, I guess TO BE FAIR, one shot into the air that didn’t hurt anyone (or so we assume) doesn’t merit the same kind of jail time as, say, being unaware one is voting illegally eh

    |=(

    1. Ana Chronistic

      I’m sure it won’t be the LAST last time

      Patreon patrons gonna patron

      1. Clif

        Penny for your thoughts.

    2. BarerMender

      What about kidnapping and attempted murder (of Amazi-Girl)?

    3. Agemegos

      This isn’t the end of his sentence. He hasn’t even been tried yet. He’s being released on bail from pre-trial detention.

      1. Felix

        This.

      2. Woden

        Which still doesn’t make much sense, since someone accused of doing something so reckless and violent, and on a college campus no less, and particularly when their alleged victims are still potentially at risk, would usually have an absurdly high bail set specifically to make it so that they cannot get back out and commit additional crimes.

        Like, this is seriously raising the question of how in the heck did Blaine raise this money, because the typical sort of bail amount I would expect is going to be well out of reach of a Fundamentalist church group, and I can’t really see any criminal group just giving him a bunch of money to do whatever for shits and giggles.

        1. SeanR

          Bail is a surety that the defendant will show up, not part of the punishment.
          If he was considered a flight risk, then the bail would be set high.
          If he was considered likely to try and finish the job, he should have been denied bail.
          From the looks of it, the judge made a terrible mistake by setting a bail at all.

        2. GoblinScribe

          Yeah, this is part of my ongoing “this feels dumb” series: I don’t care how shitty and conservative the judge was, setting any bail for a man who publicly kidnapped his lesbian daughter after firing shots on a school campus would be a national scandal that no half-qualified judge would touch with a ten-foot pole.

          Granted, since it’s Indiana, the judge was elected, so they might not be half-qualified. It would still be a national scandal. Remember, school shootings trend on Twitter. Odds are everyone across the country has heard about Becky and her dad.

        3. Fuchs Sakemann

          I know there’s some really weird laws in regards to bail throughout the US, but you’d think at the very least he would be under house arrest. I mean, even Martha Stewart, who committed a far less dangerous crime, was placed under house arrest and monitoring.

        4. sirconanad

          School shootings trend on twitter, but unfortunately unless at least 10 people are killed they are forgotten the next day.

          Since no one died and it was over in less than a day, probably less than six hours, I wouldn’t get my hopes up that there was much reporting other than “so this happened” on it.

        5. thejeff

          This one did have a kidnapping, a car chase and a super-hero, so it might well have gotten a bit more than normal press.

        6. thejeff

          Indiana’s constitution requires bail for anything but murder. And the judge apparently set it high enough that not only could he not pay it, but neither could his community.
          This seemed to accomplish the goal until Blaine stepped in – he must have been able to swing a significant amount of money. (Can’t afford college for Faz, but this he can do…)

        7. tim gueguen

          I suspect any bail would be a hardship for Toedad. I doubt he was making much money in the first place.

        8. thejeff

          Possible, though there doesn’t seem to be any indication he was poor. Owned a house in a nice town.

          Doesn’t really matter for these purposes though: It was high enough that the church group couldn’t raise it. That suggests it should have been high enough to keep him behind bars until trial – if Blaine hadn’t intervened.

        9. Makkabee

          You’re right, it shouldn’t have happened, but in a world where Roy Moore can be a judge, LOSTS of things that should never, never be, unfortunately are.

        10. NubeTrasnochada

          I think it was mentioned Joyce’s church was collecting money to bail him out.

        11. Victor Riley

          And Blaine came to them with an offer to help.

          Basically, the league of Super-Villains is collecting together. Blaine, Ross, the Bigoted Church Group, Asher (though he is trying to get out of it)… I imagine Rape-guy will get in on it, eventually.

          Heck, I wonder if Galasso will get in on this. He’d actually be the nicest one of them to deal with.

        12. He Who Abides

          Rape-Guy? You mean Ryan? Pretty sure Amber killed him, didn’t she?

        13. Deadjolras

          No.

        14. thejeff

          But he might not be mobile or even awake yet.

        15. He Who Abides

          Ah. I just remember blood, I assumed he was dead. El baddo.

        16. Chris

          He’s in the hospital now. Probably will be for a long time.

    4. JetstreamGW

      Well, I mean, someone just posted bond. That means he’s getting out until trial, not that his sentence is up.

    5. FacelessDeviant

      Kidnapping for trying to take Becky.
      Illegal firearm discharge.
      Reckless endangerment.
      Reckless driving.
      Trespassing.
      Speeding.

      And since its against HBTQ persons, its most likely considered hate crimes as well.

      1. TemperaryObsessor

        It was explicitly about her being LGBTQ.

      2. Wizard

        The hate crime part is a little tricky. Indiana didn’t have a hate crime law when that happened, but does now. (Apparently all the cool kids have one, so we had to.) Since the comic is set in the “eternal now”, I suppose he could be charged for that.

  2. butts

    the brace doesn’t go high enough we can still see his face

    1. Doctor_Who

      The doctors did their best. Before they could put on the neck brace, they had to install a neck.

      1. Reltzik

        The problem was that the incision wounds were still healing when the brace went on, and the two merged. This means that he is now, very unfortunately, part of the cast.

        1. Lingo

          I, too, wish Ross were not part of the cast.

        2. Tualha

          Oh, nicely done 🙂

    2. newllend(henryvolt)

      My problem is it’s not tight enough around his neck to suffocate him.

    3. Bagge

      If he shows up anywhere near Joyce I’m sure she will fix that little problem.

  3. DrDahliaRose

    Oh no oh no oh no oh no….. He’s gonna destroy Dina’s birthday isn’t he?

    1. DrDahliaRose

      Among other horrible horrible things.

      1. chris2315

        But nothing could possibly be worse than ruining Dina’s birthday.

        1. Reltzik

          DO. NOT. TEMPT. WILLIS.

        2. Felix

          Too late?

        3. Icalasari

          Dina being killed by a stray bullet, causing Becky to fly in a mad rage and get arrested along with her father, leading both Amber and Joyce down a spiral that leads to a suicide pact, thus causing Walky to crack and go insane, forcing his sister to drop out and turn to crime just to pay for Walky’s bills as both her and Walky get disowned for embarrassing their family, all while Ethan is forced back into the closet out of fear of meeting Becky’s fate

          With Danny closing everything out with a 10 hour long video of him playing the ukulele and singing?

        4. chris2315

          I’d argue that falls under the umbrella of “ruining Dina’a birthday.”

        5. Felix

          Too much!

        6. sdrainbow

          At first I thought this was a Buffy reference but then it took a turn and I’m not sure now.

        7. Rosstifer

          Yeah, me too. I’m assuming Joyce plays the role of Xander in that scenario.

        8. GoblinScribe

          The troll falls into a fire, terrifying Dina, who then tries to eat it.

        9. chris2315

          Clearly you don’t understand anything about defeating trolls!

        10. Needfuldoer

          It was the best she could do.

    2. abysswatcher1993

      He deserves all the punches if he tries to ruin her party.

  4. DailyBrad

    Oh yikes. And the party’s at Becky’s place. Fffffffuck.

    1. Shane

      But it’s Becky’s new place that’s not exactly publicly known to everybody, although I suppose a bit of snooping around might be able to turn it up.

      In a world where not everything is about the main characters, he might just say “F it, I’ve done enough it’s not worth more shenanigans”

      1. thejeff

        It’s possible but unlikely this will all play out today. More likely this will be hanging over us and building up for awhile.

  5. Kravis

    The plot.

    It thickens.

    1. Stu

      Like his neck.

  6. BBCC

    Oh great, this infected cockbite is out AND Robin’s in an upswing.

    Absolutely nothing happy about this strip.

    1. wwwhhattt

      “sources claim internal polling confirms”. This upswing is without doubt a thing that exists.

      1. BBCC

        I like your way of thinking about it. I’m gonna go with that for now.

      2. Bagge

        “sources…”

        Crafty Becky!

    2. 3oranges

      The more face time Ross and Blaine have in the comic, the more opportunities for them to be incinerated by a stray meteor. That’s how I deal with seeing them, anyway.

      1. BBCC

        I like your way too.

      2. David

        Comic strip stray meteors strike panels at random? That sounds like chaotic evil alignment of the author. Let’s give DW some slack and hope he does not strangle us with it.

  7. Jess

    Oh, hell’s bells, here we go.

    (On the bright side, Becky looks so cute on TV! Good for her.)

  8. Stephen Bierce

    Today’s strip is brought to you by SunTrust Bank…

    1. Stephen Bierce

      *plays the Zentraedi theme from Robotech on the Muzak*
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LHsJE_uQdO8

    2. Marsh Maryrose

      Best life!

  9. Woomy

    Haha hell yeah

  10. General Tekno

    This could play well for Robin in the polls, potentially, depending on how this goes.

    1. Clif

      Being shot defending Becky would work wonders for her popularity.

  11. Yumi

    I’m about to break the fourth wall and punch a fucker.

  12. Nicster216

    *goes back home to grab shotgun*
    “Fine………i’ll Do it myself”

    1. abysswatcher1993

      Both Toe Asshole and Thanos are horrible fathers.

  13. William Leonard Reese Jr.

    . . . .*Groans angrily* Gods I was hoping that he wouldn’t get out. . . and judging by the look on his face I bet that he is going to try and “save” his daughter again. Like near immediately.

    . . . Also Toedad should keep that full beard. He looks much better with it. I also wonder what he was reading in that first panel there.

    1. BarerMender

      He says “save” but he means “own.”

  14. mommert

    🙁 this sucks man let dina have her birthday

  15. Moon

    Fuck

  16. not someone else

    Break-a his faaaaace

    Want to break-a his faaaaaace

    1. AbelUndercity

      Remove his femurs and use them to break his faaaaaaaaace.

  17. Valerie

    Then he stepped outside and got hit by a bus and died the end

    1. Doctor_Who

      That truck owes us one, I think.

      1. Kimi

        I am suddenly reminded of a whole manga style about people being reincarnated after being hit by a bus. I don’t know if that would be an amusing thing to happen to toe dad or not.

        1. chris2315

          He could be reincarnated as an actual toe.

        2. abysswatcher1993

          Magic Man can trasnform him into a toe.

        3. vlademir1

          1. Yes Truck-kun is indeed a recurring character in the isekai genre, though is far from universally the manner in which characters meet that fate.
          2. It would be reasonably amusing to watch Ross meeting a deity (another common trope of the genre) who doesn’t meet his expectations (I’m imagining historical Jesus) who he just makes so angry that he gets dumped into another world just to be rid of him forever.

        4. abysswatcher1993

          I would pay to see that: an anime where bad people are sent to a grimdark fantasy world as punishment and as a way for gods to get entertainment.

        5. abysswatcher1993

          And unlike Drifters, these would be incompetent evil common people.

        6. Inahc

          Re: zero is almost that. Except the douchebag is murdered into learning to be less of a douchebag.

  18. newllend(henryvolt)

    You know thinking about this is really bad for Joyce’s home Church, They technically took money from the mob….THE MOB! We all should realize how far down it goes down hill from there.

    Especially Joyce’s mom, how she going to explain to her family that she went behind her family’s back and got involved in criminal activity with the rest of her church all in order to bail out the guy who held her own daughter at gun point.

    1. Charles Phipps

      Dad will divorce her.

      But the rest of the church will defend it as righteousness. Because they can’t see the darkness for the trees.

      1. Newllend(henryvolt)

        They can try to make as many excuses as they want it’s not going to vet them out of the trouble they’ve gotten themselves into. I can see the Mob probably wanting to be reimbursed for helping them.

        I Mean the church can be sort of lucrative, I Mean just ask Joyce brother. You know the one who’s a pastor.

        1. BarerMender

          Churches aren’t as lucrative as they used to be. They’re closing at a rate of several thousand a year. Important Christians that are losing their following want us to believe it’s 6-10,000 a year. A more educated guess is 4,000 a year.

      2. BarerMender

        “For as for our tree from which we grew, a fruit of ignorance is what it has; and also its leaves, it is death that dwells in them, and darkness dwells under the shadow of its boughs.”
        —The First Thought in Three Forms (Trimorphic Protennoia

      3. DrunkenNordmann

        Always difficult to see the darkness that lurks in your own heart.

    2. Abdomino

      How do we know it’s the mob again?

      1. Deadjolras

        Blaine is a mob stooge.

    3. Beef

      wait what? when did all this happen?

      1. Deadjolras

        http://www.dumbingofage.com/2019/comic/book-9-comic/03-sometimes-the-sky-was-so-far-away/bond/

    4. Bagge

      It’s a small comfort, but at least they will suffer too for dealing with Blaine.

    5. Wizard

      In fairness, I doubt Blaine said, “Hi, I’m with the Mob, would you like some filthy lucre?” He probably just claimed to be offering out of the kindness of his heart and his concern for religious freedom or whatever. So I doubt the church knowingly took Mob money. Not that that will necessarily keep them out of trouble down the line.

    6. Jengoci

      She would probably blame Becky ( and even Joyce) of the whole situation ,the whole ” Well this wouldn’t have happened if you didn’t send your owner father to jail by being hay”

  19. William Leonard Reese Jr.

    It’s interesting to see that Ross/Toedad looks. . . confused(?) by the fact that he got posted bail. So either he was never told that someone was bailing him out, or he thinks that Becky paid for it with her new DeSanto money. Either way this will be horribly fascinating to watch.

    1. Doctor_Who

      The phrase DeSanto money gives me the funny image of Robin issuing her own currency.

      Canada made money that smells like syrup, I’m sure Robin could make money that smells like Skittles.

      1. BarerMender

        It’s good thing Becky isn’t making it It would smell like– No. I can’t say it.

      2. inqntrol

        Skittles? Oh please, if Robin makes her own currency it would obviously smell like Cradbury eggs.

        1. Doctor_Who

          No point. In Robinia Cadbury eggs themselves are legal tender.

      3. Punaparta

        Once Robin kidnaps and ransoms the Queen, a DeSanto dollar will be worth five pounds.

      4. Jhon

        Canadian Tire money does not smell like tires.
        Or so I am told.

    2. woobie

      He expected bail, but thought it would be 3 1/2 months ago.

  20. tim gueguen

    Soooooo, who else finds themselves wondering, after seeing the bit about the new Patreon strip, if Penny is secretly Toedad’s long lost daughter?

    1. Reltzik

      …. well I WASN’T….

    2. Reltzik

      Well I WASN’T until you said something…

    3. Marsh Maryrose

      If it makes you happy, go ahead and write that fic.

      But if Becky and Penny are to be half-sisters, I’d go with Bonnie being the common parent and not Ross.

  21. Nicster216

    So just so I can get a recap he tried to kidnap his daughter because he wanted to make her not gay right? And exactly why did that whole council of parents help post his bail?

    1. tim gueguen

      They’re easily manipulated knuckleheads blinded by their toxic religious beliefs.

    2. Deadjolras

      Because they agreed with him. He didn’t do anything “bad”. Sure, maybe bringing a shotgun to campus was going a little bit too far, but he was just trying to save Becky’s soul and raise her right! If he gets put in jail for trying to rescue his kid’s soul, then gosh, anyone could be next!

      1. Agemegos

        It was a rifle, not a shotgun.

        1. Rartorata

          True, a Ruger No. 1 to be precise, but I fail to see the relevance.

        2. Agemegos

          Right. All that matters is that it was a weapon, so why not stop at “gun”? Why specify a shotgun when it wasn’t one?

          Like, if you were describing a sled that was drawn by Alaskan huskies, but all that mattered was that it was drawn by dogs, would you say that it was drawn by Siberian huskies? Why would you do that? Why go to extra trouble to be wrong when it doesn’t matter what kind of gun it was?

        3. Deadjolras

          I’m sorry.

    3. Kamino Neko

      Because he tried to kidnap his daughter to make her not gay.

    4. BarerMender

      He didn’t try to kidnap his daughter. He straight up kidnapped her. At gun point.

    5. Reltzik

      Remember, (selective) forgiveness is Christian!

    6. Marsh Maryrose

      He kidnapped his daughter to save her soul. After all, he would die for her.

      The council of parents helped post his bail because they think he did the right thing. After all, each of them would die for their child.

      1. Victor Riley

        Personally, I wish most of them would get on that. Chop-chop, people. Time to prove it, and get it over with.

    7. TemperaryObsessor

      Because it could have been any one of them going to jail just for trying to raise their children right.
      God she couldn’t have come up with an excuse which doesn’t say that she will buy a shotgun the moment she learns about her eldest daughter.

  22. Deadjolras

    A.A.A.A.A.A.A.
    I AM SCREAMING VERY SLOWLY.

    1. Clif

      The ability to scream very slowly is a skill that will stand you in good stead.

  23. Charles Phipps

    I predict Toedad will try to kidnap Becky at gunpoint on national television, Robin will try and intervene–which will fail miserably but GET HER RE-ELECTED!

    Then Robin will execute Order 66.

    1. JetstreamGW

      That seems like an extremely unlikely amount of power for a junior member of the house.

      1. Charles Phipps

        Yes, true, we’re still in the Naboo stage of the plan.

    2. Keulen

      Robin’s not the Senate. At least, not yet.

      1. Charles Phipps

        She’s the incumbent.

        1. woobie

          House incumbent.

  24. fire_daws

    Welp that’s this day wrecked. Probably the week too.

  25. Pocky

    I see convenient news airings even happen in prison!

  26. Mr. Random

    I feel like we’re heading to an axis of evil sorta convergence.

    1. StClair

      Legion of Doom.

      DOOOOOOM!

    2. chris2315

      Hello, Mr. MacIntyre. I’m here to talk to you about the Shit Avengers initiative.

      1. JBento

        Holy shit, I just realised: Blaine is Norman Osborn, only dumber.

  27. Newllend(henryvolt)

    Side note I guess it is a miracle that Ross is able to walk.

  28. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet

    Here’s your complimentary copy of The Catcher in the Rye. You know what to do.

    1. Sunny

      Kill John Lennon?

  29. BarerMender

    That last frame. The face of those deprived of power.

    1. Victor Riley

      How I wish for that face to be on Mitch McConnell.

      1. He Who Abides

        We all do.

  30. Delicious Taffy

    Oh, great. It’s this asshole. He can go away, now.

  31. Reltzik

    …. something’s telling me that bond money’s going to get forfeited…

    1. Bagge

      Of course they are. Everything Blaine touches turns to crap.

      1. Reltzik

        …. but what about all the stuff he’s touching that was already crap before he got there?

        1. DrunkenNordmann

          Double the amount of crap.

        2. Bagge

          Case in point: Ross is a piece of shit. Together with Blaine he is a larger piece of shit.

  32. auroki

    Man the comic Toe Dad gets out of jail is posted on my birthday. Groan

    1. Bagge

      Worst gift ever.

      1. Clif

        But how could this go badly?

        1. auroki

          One can only imagine what the great hand that draws this story has in mind. Just gonna say it in advance.

          DAMN YOU WILLIS!

  33. abysswatcher1993

    FUCK YOU, TOE ASSHOLE! WITH A CHAINSAW!

    I hope the league of villainous parents get arrested if they try to kill teenagers in a college, especially Joyce’s mom and Blaine.

    1. ian livs

      Mrs. Brown getting arrested would DEFINITELY have a huge affect on Joyce’s arc. Quite probably enough to get her to drop an F-bomb.

  34. JessWitt

    Oh hell, it’s back. And it got bailed out too?! I’m already dreading what happens next.

  35. Romanticide

    Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

    Poor Becky can’t get a long enough break, god I hate that congregation…

    1. abysswatcher1993

      Makes me wanna summon satanael and order him to shoot at their building with a bullet that has all the seven sins.

  36. Furious_Tomato

    A good story always benefits from a villain to pour your hate into. This fundie asshole is going to cause much pain before he’s brought down again.

  37. ian livs

    One thing I will always say for this toe of a man–he makes me appreciate my parents a bit more. Sure, they’re also bigoted fundie jerkfaces, but at least they haven’t done Toedad-level shit. (Though to be fair, I’m not out to them either, lmfao)

    1. ian livs

      Dammit, I should’ve said HEEL of a man. Should’ve worked that joke in there somewhere, but now it just looks awkward hangin’ out down here instead.

      1. ian livs

        (…”Heel of a toe?”)

        1. woobie

          ( back front-hole )

      2. Reltzik

        Actually, thanks to you, I’m convinced that this isn’t going to be a big deal. In other words, Toe-Heel walking is going to be low-impact.

        1. Liquid Len

          But heel-toe shifting get,s him into high gear!

  38. Raen

    Why are they even covering this if she doesn’t have party support?

    1. Rabid Rabbit

      She’s still the incumbent.

      1. Keulen

        That and it’s almost certainly too late for her to drop out and be replaced with another Republican candidate.

        1. Needfuldoer

          She has to hope enough Republicans in her district are keeping their heads in the sand for the magic R to save her. Swing voters won’t be fooled, since her record over the last two years will overshadow any promises she makes in the next two weeks, and she’s undoubtedly disenfranchised the far right.

          It’s not unheard of for late-breaking revelations about a candidate to change the outcome of an election. In one of my favorite examples of the butterfly effect, Illinois Republican Senate candidate Jack Ryan’s divorce records became public. His approval tanked, the party couldn’t find someone else to rally behind, and his opponent, Barack Obama, won the seat. If Star Trek: Voyager had better writers, Barack Obama may not have been elected president in 2008.

    2. Reltzik

      She’s entertaining in all the most wonderful and media-licious ways.

  39. TlalocW

    Dun
    DUN
    DUNNNNNNNNNN! (Lightning flash, thunder crash)

  40. ADLegend21

    Hey Amazi-girl you missed a shitstain dad.

    1. Zero

      ?
      Amazi-Girl fought him. Joyce helped.

  41. BenRG

    Ross strikes me as the sort of idiot who would attack a campaign rally. That said, in his current condition, all he’d likely achieve is putting himself in the ICU!

  42. Keulen

    Damn You Willis!

  43. Bagge

    Oh, what a jolly unlikable fellow.

  44. Bagge

    Hey, shitstain. Looki at the TV. Your daughter just went from homeless to a high position of power. For a political candidate your kind of people liked up until recently, no less. Proud for her? Impressed by her achievements? Reconsider your whole stance on kidnapping?

    Of course not, poophead. It’s all ‘recover lost property’ for you, isn’t it?

    FUDGE YOU ROSS!!!!!!!

    1. BBCC

      I love your comments, I’m just gonna put that out there. You have a way with words.

      1. Bagge

        Thank you!

        I have LOT of words for Ross. Sadly, few of them are fit for publishing, even on an internet forum.

    2. TemperaryObsessor

      The fact that he sees his daughter that way, makes me think he sees women that way, which makes me think he saw his wife that way, which makes me think he was over half the reason she died.

      1. Bagge

        Thats sadly all too likely.

        I’m sure there are other reasons too, like sekteristic stigma against seeking help from outsiders, general stigma against teraphy and other fun stuff, but I’m absolutely sure Ross’ tyrany didn’t help one bit.

        That’s one reason Becky is so fearless throughout all this. She knows that what she is running from is litterary death. “The danged extent of her allowed aspirations”. http://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-6/01-to-those-whod-ground-me/aspirations/

        1. Bagge

          (Fun to note that since Becky stressted about getting a job in that strip she landed not one but two, one as political advicer. Becky is awesome.)

        2. Marsh Maryrose

          It is time for everyone to band together to erase the stigma against teraphy!

        3. Bagge

          YES!

        4. TemperaryObsessor

          You can erase the general stigma against it, but societies, subcultures, and households which are actively invested in having people make unhealthy decisions will create little bubbles with the stigma.

      2. Wizard

        Of course. Man is the head of the family, just as God is the head of the Church. At least I’m willing to bet that’s part of their theology.

        1. Bagge

          “But as the church is subject to Crist, so let the wives also be to their husbands in everything”

          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2016/comic/book-6/02-that-perfect-girl/wife/

        2. TemperaryObsessor

          Yea I like to take everything before Jesus, and after Jesus with a grain of salt.
          I get the feeling that within the community some households take that passage more seriously than others.

  45. NinjaNick

    Great. Toe-creep’s back and ready to crash the party.

  46. Nenja

    Oh no! I hoped he would stay away forever!

  47. 0kami

    Yes, I’m deeply worried about what this bodes for, as far as Becky’s big birthday celebration… but does Toedad’s bunkmate have a tablet? Aren’t those contraband in prison?

    1. Bagge

      He carved it out of soap.

    2. Wizard

      He was probably being held in the Monroe County Jail. I wasn’t able to find any specific info about tablets there, but a little quick research revealed that some jails and prisons do allow prisoners to use tablets. They’re typically provided by the institution or an approved vendor, you can’t just bring your own. The tablets are designed so that they only connect to the facility intranet, without direct access to the wider internet, and have software that monitors and records everything an inmate does with them. They can be used to do things such as legal research, reading e-books, playing games, making phone calls and sending e-mails. Inmates like electronic communication because it’s less likely to be delayed or denied. (Albeit, the service often comes at a high cost, since they have a literally captive market.) Prison staff like it, since it’s easy to monitor and record. (Indiscreet phone conversations and e-mails can and have been introduced into evidence at trials.) Plus, you can’t e-mail a prisoner drugs, weapons or other physical contraband.

  48. Lone Duck

    Hmmm. Suddenly, the earlier post that said “Winter is coming” seems a lot more foreboding.

  49. He Who Abides

    I’m glad Blaine bailed Toedad out. Granted, it’s only because I foresee Toedad getting locked up again after killing Blaine for being a stooge of “thut thar Kim Jong Kardashi-Un fella”, but still . . .

    What? I can buy Toedad not wanting to be bailed out by a henchman of the Korean mob. Or really, anyone with any major ties to non-Israel foreign countries. Call me crazy, but he strikes me as the type.

  50. Minim

    I hope this is leading to him getting baseball-batted in the faaaace by Sarah, but I expect any retribution will happen only after some amount of angst, character-building, superhero antics and a few Dover-sized cliffhangers.

    Dang it, dang it, bloody hell dang it.

  51. Rosstifer

    My only hope is now that Becky has some power and influence (she’s working directly with Senator DeSanto after all), anything ToeDad tries to do will be dealt with swiftly and brutally. This failure will reflect badly on Blaine, who will get talent out by the mob. Everyone wins!

    1. Rosstifer

      *taken out by the mob.

  52. ValdVin

    This is like the movie Taken in reverse.

  53. Heavensrun

    I’m not sure I buy that a kidnapper would be able to post bail. Feel like the judge wouldd’ve denied it in this case.

    1. thejeff

      According to comments in the strip where Blaine showed up to help the congregation make bail for him, in Indiana bail can only be denied for murder charges. The bail was set high enough that they couldn’t pay it without Blaine’s mob help though, which would normally serve the same purpose.

      1. Wizard

        Correct. The Indiana state constitution specifies that bail can only be denied in case of murder. In this case, we have some fairly serious charges, but on the other hand, Ross would likely be deemed a low flight risk. (not a lot of money, strong community ties) So bail was probably fairly high, but not zillion dollar high.

        1. thejeff

          Might be a low flight risk, but he should be considered an extremely high risk of re-offending.
          Wonder if they’re even going to try to inform Becky that her kidnapper is out on bail.

        2. CJ

          Probably not. She might request a guard.
          Though if toedad appears at a congress-women’s place armed and trying to kidnap or kill the campaign manager, this might help that he’s not granted bail again because obviously he will do it again.

        3. UnDrewsual

          Well, once he’s killed the congresswoman and/or his daughter, it won’t matter if he is granted bail again or not.
          And let’s be honest, he will attempt to kill one or both of them, although he will probably see it as something “they made him do”.

  54. Tualha

    I wonder who posted his bond? His church? Blaine?

    1. Tualha

      Oh, or maybe whatshisface, the rapist that Amber cut up.

      1. Zaxares

        I’m pretty sure based on info gleaned from past strips, it’s Blaine.

    2. Agemegos

      I think Blaine supplied a crucial part of the the funds, perhaps not out of his own resources but from those of a Mob-owned enterprise that he controls as the stooge. But I think that the church committee of the congregation that Ross shares with Joyce’s family are the bailors of record.

      1. Tualha

        Oh right, that strip.

  55. DanLovatClark

    Looking forward to the late arrival of Sarah and her baseball bat at Becky’s party now.

    1. Bagge

      That will be EPIC!

  56. Needfuldoer

    oh no

  57. Rabisch

    So Robin can really be reelected thanks to Becky work. It is a good thing or….?

    1. Sunny

      Well, Becky is telling Robin how to vote, so in a way the campaign is about getting Becky elected.

    2. Needfuldoer

      “Internal polling” is just a more professional way to phrase “the campaign organization claims”. It’s meaningless hype.

      Outside polling can at least put on an air of objectivity, but it’s important go remember any polling will be slanted by whoever’s organizing it and who it is they’re polling. Look at

      1. Needfuldoer

        *Look at the wide margin of error between the results different polling organizations asking presumably the same questions. Answers differ depending on phrasing (making one answer seem more appealing) to methodology (the elderly are more likely to answer a cold call survey, young people by text). Aggregates that analyze these varied results are more worth the time to read than the polls themselves in many cases.

      2. thejeff

        OTOH internal polling actually tends to be better – often much better – than public polling. More detailed, better breakdown by area and demographics. You’re using it to target your campaigning. What the campaign says about their public polling is of course just more campaign bullshit.

        OTGH, this is Robin’s campaign. Becky’s running it and I don’t think we’ve seen her arranging for any serious polling.

        1. Needfuldoer

          Exactly. Why would the campaign tilt their hand and give away data that shows where they’re struggling?

  58. wakeangel2001

    I’m surprised bond was even an option for a guy who discharged a firearm on a college campus, was it okay because it wasn’t QUITE a mass shooting?

    1. King Daniel

      As mentioned above, Indiana state law requires it to be an option for anything short of murder.

  59. Kater

    “I’d like to talk to you about the Dad-vengers initiative?”
    “What are we avenging?”
    “Dad-venging, please.”
    “What are we Dad-venging?”
    “Daughters who insist on existing as autonomous people beyond our demands.”
    “Where do I sign?”

    1. Bagge

      “Dads. Why is it always dads?”

      1. Needfuldoer

        [Hank is in the lineup, looking around with suspicion and getting increasingly uncomfortable]

  60. tim gueguen

    This strip is missing a panel, the one where all the prisoners cheer because Ross is leaving. They all got tired pretty fast of him trying to convert them.

    1. Jago

      A lot of prisoners are religious, it’s probably not that weird.

      1. tim gueguen

        But the ones who are already religious probably wouldn’t appreciate his narrow definition of what a “true Christian” is.

  61. ScarletSabre

    if he gets spurned and turned away by everyone when he goes home, will he be a Snubbed Toe?

    I’ll see myself out

  62. Foolong

    Plot twist: the QC emu is waiting for Ross outside!

    1. Clif

      Even an invisible emu can have a stubbed toe? What a wonderful comic.

    2. He Who Abides

      The one that’s friends with Winslow now, right?

      I’m down for that.

  63. Raznaak

    God DAMMIT Willis!

  64. Rartorata

    Now, wait, where’s Ross being held? I’d have thought Monroe County, but there’s no way they’re picking up WNDU that far south.

    1. Rartorata

      And to answer the question I had originally, this strip takes place sometime before 7AM, as that is the time WNDU’s local-news coverage ends, followed by four(!) hours of Today.

  65. Hiiroarana79

    Bandaged toe…

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