Danny doesn’t want to hurt Joe’s feelings on being a good boyfriend, but Danny doesn’t necessarily believe that Joe is capable of it. I feel like Danny and Sal are going to place bets on how long it takes for Joe and Joyce’s relationship to implode.
As of this strip, I genuinely WANT Danny and Sal to work. The rest of the existing couples, I’m willing to see go down in entertaining flames if that’s where it takes us, but the chemistry in that last panel is palpable, and displays a considerable level of mutual understanding.
Danny: “I believe in Joe! Yessir, I am completely, 100% certain that Joe exists. No figment of my imagination could possibly leave that many unwashed sweat-socks around. Look, the paint on the ceiling above the pile is crinkling, no way I made Joe up. Though granted, I did once trip, fall face first into that, and spend the next two days seeing Eleanor Roosevelt hiding behind the curtains.”
I have screenshotted your comment (with your username, because crediting people is a Good Thing). I don’t know when I will deploy it, but I am morally certain that at some point I will do so.
Maybe he won’t be good enough, but I expect him to exceed expectations
Jacob
I am currently expecting that Joe is going to try really hard to be the good boyfriend, exceed all expectations, then Joyce will snap and want to get absolutely destroyed by him and they will ultimately break up because Joe became a good Christian boy and Joyce became a crazed sex monster.
Possibly.
RacingTurtle
Joe is Jewish.
APW
So were literally all of the apostles.
RacingTurtle
I can say with certainty that this comic will not be featuring the conversion of its most prominent Jewish character to Christianity, because the author is not a gigantic asshole.
I wanna believe in Joe…! There’s a genuine effort being put in & an acknowledgement of his dangerous tendencies to the point he was scared of corrupting Joyce.
Danny speaking like an elf; they don’t lie, but they don’t necessarily give you the truth either. It’s a wise strategy to adopt, especially if you plan to go into law or politics.
That’s how I lie. Well no, I’ll usually lie by telling mostly the truth but peppering in lies here and there to make me seem more sympathetic while admitting enough fault that I don’t seem like I’m outright fibbing.
There is an art form to conveying false information by telling the strict and absolute truth that is an interesting intellectual challenge. It is performed strictly for your own amusement though, because people won’t remember what you actually said, but rather what they thought you were saying, or sometimes what they expected you to say regardless of anything you actually said.
Dr Sharks
I’m trying to play a D&D character right now that is a Fey that does exactly this, and yeah, that shit is HARD to maintain. Especially when you have a lot of secrets.
“You’re a cleric, right?”
“Well gosh, why else would I be carryin’ around this holy symbol?”
“What god do you worship?”
“Oh! Have you heard of Pelor, god of the Sun? He’s amazin’! My light is but a meager candle compared t’his.”
“Why do you have horns and hooves?”
“Aw, I hope ya don’t judge my daddy too harshly. It must get so lonely on a goat farm.”
Aviator
I think I might have to try this method of Roleplay.
thejeff
It’s definitely a thing that works better in fiction. It falls apart pretty fast if people start to question you.
Dr. Sharks
The game has been online since this character was introduced (my previous one retired), which is lucky because I have a bunch of post-its on my screen with reminders for ways to get out of saying things. The southern accent really helps; it makes me seem harmless, makes double negatives sound unintentional, lets me get away with omitting “a” and “the” to mask whether I’m speaking generally or specifically, that sort of thing. In practice it winds up less like “don’t tell lies” and more like “avoid actually making any concrete statements of fact at all.”
The most effective way of lying is the conspiracy peddler way: tell an obvious, absurd lie, but a different one every day. Never try to be self-consistent, you should contradict yourself constantly. Just flood your victims under a deluge of incoherent lies. In the end, people will give up and stop believing your contradictors instead of being rational and stopping paying attention to what you say.
They give you the truth, just not all of the truth. Enough of the truth that you fill in the gaps how they want you to. It’s very useful in all manner of scenarios; I used to use it to get out of morning shifts by telling a completely unrelated story about how my brother needed a lift to work.
One ring for the Ukele Dorks under their hats
Three rings for the freshmen in their halls of dorm
Seven rings to alchohlic RA’s doomed to cry
And one ring to Prof Brock in the sublab of Bio101
Where the shadows lie
This conversation must look very strange from the outside of the building. I would have thought someone would have stopped Sal from doing this awhile ago, butt I guess no body cares.
You tend not to make rules about things you expect no-one to be stupid enough to try. That is, until someone tries them.
Depending on the state, speed limits apply to all motorized vehicles and if you have a car with no motor, you can drive it down a mountain just as fast as it will go by picking up speed, and it’s perfectly legal. There didn’t use to be laws preventing you from climbing the outsides of skyscrapers.
Needfuldoer
Safety regs are written in blood.
thejeff
Yup. Everytime you come across some absurd law or regulation, remember that it only exists because somebody did the thing.
TerribleTransit
Well, sometimes it’s because someone made up stories about doing the thing and perpetuated that lie in an attempt to demonize the group that “did the thing”. But, like, usually it’s the reason you said.
I appreciate your commitment to this ship. Speaking as someone who goes back from time to time to reread every Shortpacked!Arnold strip.
HueSatLight
Have you ever stopped to consider how friggin’ huge this campus is? Like, we only see the stuff the main cast is doing, but everywhere, always, all those other people are having their own adventures we’ll never ever know!
Dorothy can be the wedding triple-date smasher. Having two of her ex-boyfriends in the same place would make for a lot of possibilities for Bad Decisions to happen, and she’s been falling into a lot of those.
213 thoughts on “Found someone”
Ana Chronistic
the Danny version of “Bless your heart”
Kyrik Michalowski
Danny doesn’t want to hurt Joe’s feelings on being a good boyfriend, but Danny doesn’t necessarily believe that Joe is capable of it. I feel like Danny and Sal are going to place bets on how long it takes for Joe and Joyce’s relationship to implode.
Taellosse
I feel like “implode” is emphatically not how their relationship will end – there will be lots of sound and fury, no matter what it signifies
Freemage
As of this strip, I genuinely WANT Danny and Sal to work. The rest of the existing couples, I’m willing to see go down in entertaining flames if that’s where it takes us, but the chemistry in that last panel is palpable, and displays a considerable level of mutual understanding.
Freemage
*Reads what I just wrote, sighs melancholily, and prepares the inevitable DYW! post to come….*
Needfuldoer
“Bless your hat.”
Angel
well if he stuck through with him after the list leak i’d assume he’d def be supportive at his attempt at a ‘real’ relationship lol
Doctor_Who
Danny: “I believe in Joe! Yessir, I am completely, 100% certain that Joe exists. No figment of my imagination could possibly leave that many unwashed sweat-socks around. Look, the paint on the ceiling above the pile is crinkling, no way I made Joe up. Though granted, I did once trip, fall face first into that, and spend the next two days seeing Eleanor Roosevelt hiding behind the curtains.”
eh, whatever
Thank you.
V
Awwww best frieeeeends!
Lumino
Can I just say, Joe has great facial expressions in this comic. Five, especially, is just really heartwarming. Danny’s affirmance means a lot to him.
Reltzik
The key to being a good, supportive friend is an incomplete and selective honesty.
Bogeywoman
Me when given a gift: “It is very shiny. And round. I like things which are shiny and round.”
Dave the Inverted
I have screenshotted your comment (with your username, because crediting people is a Good Thing). I don’t know when I will deploy it, but I am morally certain that at some point I will do so.
Mr. Random
I believe he will try his best.
And what do you think his best is?
Proxiehunter
Probably better than he thinks.
Thag Simmons
Maybe he won’t be good enough, but I expect him to exceed expectations
Jacob
I am currently expecting that Joe is going to try really hard to be the good boyfriend, exceed all expectations, then Joyce will snap and want to get absolutely destroyed by him and they will ultimately break up because Joe became a good Christian boy and Joyce became a crazed sex monster.
Possibly.
RacingTurtle
Joe is Jewish.
APW
So were literally all of the apostles.
RacingTurtle
I can say with certainty that this comic will not be featuring the conversion of its most prominent Jewish character to Christianity, because the author is not a gigantic asshole.
Thag Simmons
Joyce not knowing Danny’s name is one of my favourite running gags in this comic.
TrueVCU
It pleases me that Danny is learning to effectively snark
Puppeteer Nessus
It’s also good to see Danny and Sal having this same-wavelength snark. Marvel Teammate snark.
newlland(Henryvolt)
I believe….that Joe will put forth his best effort and that’s all that matters
Yotomoe
At the very least it won’t be his worst effort.
VolticEXE
I wanna believe in Joe…! There’s a genuine effort being put in & an acknowledgement of his dangerous tendencies to the point he was scared of corrupting Joyce.
Kyrik Michalowski
Danny speaking like an elf; they don’t lie, but they don’t necessarily give you the truth either. It’s a wise strategy to adopt, especially if you plan to go into law or politics.
Carms
fucking twist Danny becomes president.
Thag Simmons
Dorothy would die.
Tan
And be reborn as a supervillain.
Kyrik Michalowski
I think Dorothy would have a breakdown if Danny became president. I would love to see her reaction.
Chronos
Okay, I low-key want to see this because that would be hilarious.
MM
That tracks.
Yotomoe
That’s how I lie. Well no, I’ll usually lie by telling mostly the truth but peppering in lies here and there to make me seem more sympathetic while admitting enough fault that I don’t seem like I’m outright fibbing.
Clif
There is an art form to conveying false information by telling the strict and absolute truth that is an interesting intellectual challenge. It is performed strictly for your own amusement though, because people won’t remember what you actually said, but rather what they thought you were saying, or sometimes what they expected you to say regardless of anything you actually said.
Dr Sharks
I’m trying to play a D&D character right now that is a Fey that does exactly this, and yeah, that shit is HARD to maintain. Especially when you have a lot of secrets.
“You’re a cleric, right?”
“Well gosh, why else would I be carryin’ around this holy symbol?”
“What god do you worship?”
“Oh! Have you heard of Pelor, god of the Sun? He’s amazin’! My light is but a meager candle compared t’his.”
“Why do you have horns and hooves?”
“Aw, I hope ya don’t judge my daddy too harshly. It must get so lonely on a goat farm.”
Aviator
I think I might have to try this method of Roleplay.
thejeff
It’s definitely a thing that works better in fiction. It falls apart pretty fast if people start to question you.
Dr. Sharks
The game has been online since this character was introduced (my previous one retired), which is lucky because I have a bunch of post-its on my screen with reminders for ways to get out of saying things. The southern accent really helps; it makes me seem harmless, makes double negatives sound unintentional, lets me get away with omitting “a” and “the” to mask whether I’m speaking generally or specifically, that sort of thing. In practice it winds up less like “don’t tell lies” and more like “avoid actually making any concrete statements of fact at all.”
Doctor_Who
Also like an elf, if you tickle Danny’s chin and answer his riddles three, he’ll grant you a wish.
It’s Danny though, so hopefully your wish is for haberdashery advice or a ukulele cover of “We Don’t Talk About Bruno”.
Kyrik Michalowski
Such a hard decision to choose, I can’t decide which would be “better.”
Thag Simmons
You think he’d try and do different character voices or just sing every part the same?
Thag Simmons
Telling the truth, even a half-truth, is always going to be more effective than having to tell an outright lie.
foamy
On the contrary: The world belongs to those who can look you straight in the eye and say the sky is green.
People actually pick up pretty well on too-clever-by-half evasions. A simple lie, delivered with confidence, is far more convincing.
someone
The most effective way of lying is the conspiracy peddler way: tell an obvious, absurd lie, but a different one every day. Never try to be self-consistent, you should contradict yourself constantly. Just flood your victims under a deluge of incoherent lies. In the end, people will give up and stop believing your contradictors instead of being rational and stopping paying attention to what you say.
jflb96
They give you the truth, just not all of the truth. Enough of the truth that you fill in the gaps how they want you to. It’s very useful in all manner of scenarios; I used to use it to get out of morning shifts by telling a completely unrelated story about how my brother needed a lift to work.
True Survivor
One ring for the Ukele Dorks under their hats
Three rings for the freshmen in their halls of dorm
Seven rings to alchohlic RA’s doomed to cry
And one ring to Prof Brock in the sublab of Bio101
Where the shadows lie
Kyrik Michalowski
That was fantastic, I had to take a moment to breathe and not choke to death after laughing. Thank you.
nobodybasically
“There’s no question in my mind, Joe does exist. Just like love, we know he’s there, waiting to be missed.”
True Survivor
This conversation must look very strange from the outside of the building. I would have thought someone would have stopped Sal from doing this awhile ago, butt I guess no body cares.
Puppeteer Nessus
This college is like Hogwarts with its indifference to student safety
Clif
You tend not to make rules about things you expect no-one to be stupid enough to try. That is, until someone tries them.
Depending on the state, speed limits apply to all motorized vehicles and if you have a car with no motor, you can drive it down a mountain just as fast as it will go by picking up speed, and it’s perfectly legal. There didn’t use to be laws preventing you from climbing the outsides of skyscrapers.
Needfuldoer
Safety regs are written in blood.
thejeff
Yup. Everytime you come across some absurd law or regulation, remember that it only exists because somebody did the thing.
TerribleTransit
Well, sometimes it’s because someone made up stories about doing the thing and perpetuated that lie in an attempt to demonize the group that “did the thing”. But, like, usually it’s the reason you said.
Kirt Dankmyer
Folks of all genders are too busy checking out Sal’s posterior to think of the safety implications.
Dana
Dan’s got a good balance of loyalty to his friend and realism going.
BBCC
Yeeeeaaaaaah, you’re gonna have to prove that, Joe.
Kyrik Michalowski
I take it your quest for Sal continues? Or has Robin won you over?
Clif
Mine does. I have Walky, but Sal tends to be elusive for us mere mortals.
Suet
Touché, Sal, but… YOU get a double date! YOU get a double date! Everyone gets a triple date!! Because so far it’s
Lucy with Walky
Sal with Danny
Joyce with Joe
Dorothy with
HueSatLight
Dorothy with Arnold.
Jon S.
Dorothy with Maytag.
KM
I appreciate your commitment to this ship. Speaking as someone who goes back from time to time to reread every Shortpacked!Arnold strip.
HueSatLight
Have you ever stopped to consider how friggin’ huge this campus is? Like, we only see the stuff the main cast is doing, but everywhere, always, all those other people are having their own adventures we’ll never ever know!
until the meet cute.
Seregiel
Dorothy with Jacob. 🙂
Yotomoe
Yeah I honestly hope they swing this thing into a triple date.
Kyrik Michalowski
Dorothy with “fun-size” Walky.
Gigafreak
Dorothy can be the
weddingtriple-date smasher. Having two of her ex-boyfriends in the same place would make for a lot of possibilities for Bad Decisions to happen, and she’s been falling into a lot of those.Yotomoe