Genius
Posted on July 10, 2012 by David M Willis
I will be at San Diego Comic-Con!  I'll have Dumbing of Age posters, pin-up postcards, and Shortpacked! books.  If you're in the webcomics area, I'm not far away!

188 thoughts on “Genius”

  1. Uniqueantique

    Did that really happen?

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      No it’s just a comic. 😛

      1. MentalMister

        “Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?” — Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore

        1. HelenKellersDog

          @MentalMister

          10 points to Gryffindor!

        2. iRamble

          High five. The highest of fives.

  2. taekwondogirl

    Overload of awww can be heard over Billie’s ego.

    1. Sensedog

      Thankfully yes. This just inflated Billie’s ego way too much.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Egos are like balloons, one prick and it’s gone.

        1. Khrene Cleaver

          Man, where’s Mike when you need him?

        2. Kernanator

          He’s not there because you need him. That’s how he’s trolling you.

        3. Plasma Mongoose

          Does Mike even know Billie?

        4. Kernanator

          Only peripherally. Something she should be glad of.

        5. Broken Products

          He probably knows her mom

        6. Wack'd

          If Billie’s mom here is anything like Walkyverse!Billie’s mom, Mike’s not gonna need a nickel.

        7. Kernanator

          Ey-oooo!

  3. Bekah

    No Billie. You’re a genious. Not a genius. Geniuses are smart.

  4. Uniqueantique

    Agree Taek.

  5. Mkvenner

    No Billie, You’re drunk.

    1. Kernanator

      That is implied by her being Billie.

  6. Deemah

    ALL HAIL BILLIE!!!

    1. Aizat

      ALL HAIL MEGATRON!

      1. Gordon

        ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD

        1. Aizat

          GLORY TO THE EMPIRE!

        2. Ben

          My life for Aiur!

        3. LaurelRaven

          The Browncoats will rise again!

        4. Yotomoe

          Soggies Shall Rule!

        5. Rex Hondo

          CROM AND STEEL!!!

        6. Luke

          The South shall rise again!

        7. Kernanator

          For Pony!

        8. Aizat

          For Disneyland!

        9. Tan

          For Ascalon and the Wall!

        10. Wack'd

          To business!

        11. Kaj

          Spoooooooon!

        12. Random Webcomics Junkie

          FOR NARNIA!

        13. Plasma Mongoose

          GORDON’S ALIVE!

        14. Regalli

          SOGGIES MAY RULE. *Dashes off*

        15. Yotomoe

          Kids Next Door Rule!!!

        16. Aizat

          PETROL: WE’RE RUNNING OUT!

        17. Aizat

          I live for the swarm!

        18. Heimdallw32

          For the Dark Gods!

        19. Aizat

          Blood for the Blood God!

        20. Heimdallw32

          Gurgle for Nurgle!

        21. Rex Hondo

          As of this moment, we are all dead.
          We go into battle to reclaim our lives.
          This we do gladly, for we are Jem’Hadar.
          Remember: Victory is Life!

        22. ryan

          FOR THE ROYALTY!

        23. Aizat

          LET JUSTICE PREVAIL!

        24. Rex Hondo

          SPOON!!

        25. Tarkada

          Not in the face! Not in the face!

        26. Kryss LaBryn

          For Theoden! Forth Eorlingas!

        27. Gargamel

          Tonight we shall taste man-flesh!

        28. Plasma Mongoose

          My nipples are very sensitive!

        29. Blob Marley

          BY GRAPTHAR’S HAMMER!

        30. Ribbits

          FOR THE IMPERIUM OF MAN!

        31. Usayasha

          THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!

        32. Kernanator

          PIKACHU, I CHOOSE YOU!

        33. BriGuy

          And may the odds be EVER in your favor!

        34. Tralos

          AVENGERS, ASSEMBLE!

        35. LaurelRaven

          I must not fear.
          Fear is the mind-killer.
          Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
          I will face my fear.
          I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
          And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
          Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
          Only I will remain.

        36. Roborat

          Zug Zug

        37. Regalli

          KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!

        38. Rex Hondo

          Can’t believe I’m the first one her to come up with:

          Autobots, transform and roll out!

        39. Kernanator

          Give me your FAAAAAAAAACE!

    2. Shade

      She’s so good she hooked them up in this moment retroactively!

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        She altered time? Billie really is a genius.

    3. Dagon

      Harriers for the cup!

    4. Cybersnark

      My life, my soul,
      for the Hive, for the Hive.

  7. Aizat

    Nope.avi

  8. Ridureyu

    THE EGO

    IT HURTS MY HEAD

    1. Jehosaphat

      Then stop slapping yourself in the head with an ego?

  9. Wonder Wig

    Willis had to upload an extra large version of tonight’s comic to contain Billie’s ego.

    1. Yotomoe

      and waistline

      1. Kernanator

        Mmmm…

        I’m sorry, what were we talking about?

  10. Plasma Mongoose

    Give this girl a Nobel Peace Prize.

    1. Kernanator

      You know what they say: Make love, not war.

      1. Yotomoe

        Love is War. I have suffered quite a few casualties.

        1. Aizat

          No wonder why there are cases where people die because of love.

    2. Bekah

      You mean Nobel Piece Prize.

      As in Piece of Ass.

      …

      I’m sorry.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Billie does have what it takes to win THAT prize at least.

        1. Kernanator

          Awwwwwwww yeaaaaaaaaaaah.

        2. Aizat

          I concur.

  11. Beachfox

    If this becomes Billie’s “thing”, I will be so happy.
    “Sal is Amazigirl!”
    “I hooked up Wally and Dorothy!”
    “Joyce is having a gay affair with Spidercar!”
    “My Math TA fights aliens at night!”
    “A vast conspiracy of alternate-reality ninjas and sentient tomatos is preventing any of these stories from being published in the student paper!”

    1. Kernanator

      “None of this is real, and I’m really the main character in a comic strip!

      1. Yotomoe

        “Billie that’s proposterous! No way you’d be the main character. You’re just not protagonist material”

        1. Kernanator

          “You’re a side character at best.”

      2. ryan

        billie needs yellow word balloons.

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          Why is that? Because she’s half-asian?

        2. Ribbits

          Because Deadpool.

    2. Wack'd

      “And my math teacher is an alien in a robotic human suit!” (Please tell me I’m not the first to notice the last name.)

      Wait, sentient tomatoes? What? And what of the giant sentient pastries?

  12. alicemacher

    No, Billie, it isn’t Opposite Day. If it were, what you said would be correct.

    1. Yotomoe

      And she’d be a skinny, sober person who likes to take relationships slow.

      1. Kernanator

        Whoa now, let’s not go crazy here.

  13. Mister_E_17

    this, i can’t even handle this, cannot stop laughing

  14. Leon

    ROFL Oh, Billie, Billie, Billie.

  15. Confuzor

    I’m having trouble reading what Billie is doing with her hands in the second panel.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      I think you will find that it is the cloth/towelette that she used to clean Walky’s mouth in panel four.

    2. Ravux

      She’s reaching into her bag for a handkerchief.

    3. Rex Hondo

      Making armpit farts to hold Walky’s attention.

    4. Luke

      She’s going either cleavage fishing or purse fishing. Your choice, I’ve made mine.

      1. Kernanator

        As have I.

        1. Luke

          And was it a wise choice?

        2. Kernanator

          That depends on your point of view. I don’t regret it, if that’s what you’re asking.

        3. Luke

          Considering you’re currently represented by a sexually open girl with a condomed dildo on her head, I think I can imagine which choice it was and whether or not it was regretted.

        4. Kernanator

          Heh heh heh.

        5. Luke

          Indeed.

        6. ryan

          ah, so it WAS purse fishing!

        7. Fignewton of my Imagination

          No she pulled the tissue that she stuffs her bra with, so incidentally Walky got first with Dorothy and 2 with Billie in the same strip! All hail Wallky!

        8. Plasma Mongoose

          Are you suggesting that Billie’s chest puppies are closer to being Toy Poodles rather than Saint Bernards?

      2. GenericScreenName101

        Whatever she is doing Walky seems to have his attention focused elsewhere. Which could be considered a genius accomplishment due to the fact that it got him to stop eating his nachitos and do what she told him to do.

        1. GenericScreenName101

          Aka: “the power of boobs compels you”

        2. Yotomoe

          what a drastic ploy for attention, but one Billie has perhaps used MANY a time before.

      3. CWR

        She’s pulling out one of the napkins stuffed in her tube top to wipe Walky’s mouth – remember, there are few women who are satisfied with their chest size, no matter how well endowed they may be naturally.

        REMEMBER!

    5. Yotomoe

      She is performing a heart-removal fatality on herself. She’s tired of Walky’s inneptitude with women

  16. Plasma Mongoose

    Billie amazes even herself.

    1. MarcinMN

      That doesn’t sound too hard. 😉

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        I can believe that.

  17. Mishyana

    I may be a bit behind on this, but are the navigation buttons a giant pile of broken for anyone else? If I go back from the newest comic, I can’t get back to it without reloading the bookmark entirely, and hitting ‘latest’ only makes it go forward a few strips, not to the actual latest strip.

    1. Kernanator

      Yeah, that happens sometimes. Sometimes it takes a while for Willis to update the links, at least that’s what I think is going on.

      1. David

        I never update links manually. That’s taken care of by the site itself. It sounds like your computer is keeping old versions of the pages.

        1. Kernanator

          Huh. So that’s what would happen. Good to know.

  18. Gundi

    *Face palm.*

  19. Kernanator

    Jennifer Billingsworth. Suuuuuuper Genius.

    1. Aizat

      And remember, mud spelled backwards is dum.

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      She fights crime!

      1. Aizat

        She have huge…..tracts of land.

        1. Broken Products

          Tig Ol’ Bitties

        2. PhysicsLB

          All i really want to do is sing…

        3. Aizat

          Stop that, stop that! You’re not going to do a song while I’m here.

    3. Yotomoe

      Race through freshman year, going to buy lots of beer
      is a girl with a knack for innebriation
      A super powered mind
      A gigantic behind
      Rescues the losers from destruction
      This is the theme song
      To Jennifer Billingsworth

      1. Aizat

        Billie is an average girl that no one understands.

  20. TacosForever

    Damn it. Billie gettin’ served will have to wait until a later comic. For now, she just got a super-inflated ego instead.

    1. Resne

      You are a god, sir. Called this panel so hard.

      1. TacosForever

        Actually, this would be a perfect moment for Joyce to go, “Well actually…” While Billie is gloating over her success. Maybe you too had a bowl of Psychic O’s. (I thought they were cornflakes!)

        1. Resne

          It’s easy to mistake them for cornflakes; they aren’t exactly O-shaped.

  21. LionHeart

    “Great Walky! Now to teach you how to have sex. Now get over there and J-J-JAM IT IN!”

    1. CWR

      “Okay, what is it, and where do I jam it?”

      1. Raiser

        “Your mom jams it for a nickel.”
        “Mike, what are you doing here?”
        “Your mom.” (beat panel) “For a nickel.”
        *facepalm*

  22. Foundling

    This is my favorite strip of the entire comic to date. Thanks, Walky!

  23. Yotomoe

    Damn…I wish Billie’d help me witha girl

    1. Kernanator

      Billie’s Dating Advice: Sign up now!

      1. Yotomoe

        It’s gotta be better than Lucy’s. Then again she only charges 5 cents.

        1. MrSmiles

          nah walky’s just awesome.

        2. CWR

          The same as Mike’s rate.

        3. Kernanator

          After Lucy grew up, she had to get her money somehow.

  24. Resne

    Now pan back to see Joyce sulking next to Sarah.

    1. TacosForever

      She should take Walky’s advice and pretend she’s him.

  25. Yotomoe

    I just love that Sierra is kinda just…3rd-wheelin’ it next to them kissin’.

    1. TacosForever

      Sarah is always third wheelin’ it. And not givin’ a damn. This is why she’s awesome.

      Also, shoes are for losers.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        You meant to say Sierra right, TacosForever?

        1. TacosForever

          Oops. Yep. Although Sarah’s pretty awesome too.

  26. Yotomoe

    From this day on Billie was known as the love doctor.
    She is directly responsible for hundreds of divorces throughout the midwest.

    1. Wack'd

      So her parents were lying when they said it wasn’t her fault!

      1. Kernanator

        Oh shit! Ahahahaha.

  27. numaron

    As if Billie’s ego needed a boost.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      IT needs a booster shot to reduce the swelling.

  28. Twinplus

    What time of year is it anyway? I see turtleneck sweaters alongside tanktops and shorts. I’m confused.

    1. Kernanator

      Time is weird in the DoA universe.

    2. Aizat

      It’s S’Winter.

      1. sonthedoctor

        Wummer

      2. Daibhid C

        Thanks. I’ll have that in my head all day now.

        (It’s ski and snowball fight time/And also fly a kite time…)

    3. Wack'd

      It’s late August/early September. Weather gets wonky in the fall.

    4. Rex Hondo

      Indiana.

  29. Christopher S

    This might be my favorite strip in a while.

  30. Zoey

    hahahaha

  31. K. Ivan Ruppert

    Is it just me, or is this universe’s Billie really super in need of a good swift kick in the ass?

    1. Wack'd

      Please. It’d just bounce off.

      …I’m so sorry.

  32. Jack Faire

    This is like when you’re in a bar to introduce a fiance to an old friend or a new one and they tell you there is no way you could ever score with the hottie that just walked in not knowing that is your fiance.

  33. Kern Brit

    Wait wait wait – Dorothy is *willingly kissing* Walky? In PUBLIC?!?

    Although – messing with Billie is also an option…

    1. Wack'd

      I think Mike sufficiently guilted her last time to make it a non-issue.

  34. Gargamel

    Yes Billie you are genius.

    Everyone’s just holding you back.
    THEY ALL DESERVE TO PAY!

    1. Aizat

      WITH THEIR SOULS IF THEY HAVE TO!

      1. Gargamel

        OR THEIR WALLETS!
        KNOCK OVER STUDENT ACCOUNTS!
        TAKE THEIR PRECIOUS STUDENT BUDGET!

        That’ll teach em’ for firing you from the student news agency…

  35. Jererry

    Billie, you are a sociopath and you don’t even have a clue about it. Damn.

  36. Raticate5

    Wait a second. Did he touch the boobies? And where are the juicy details?!?!

    1. Wack'd

      They’re over there, in a box.

  37. Kirt Dankmyer

    Okay, I never expected Billie to be the funniest person in this comic, but she totally is. 🙂

  38. Nerdman

    Sierra: still not wearing shoes.

  39. Wack'd

    That is the most deformed heart I have ever seen.

    1. Rex Hondo

      It’s from the cholesterol deposits from all the nachitos.

  40. David Grubb

    Somebody hasn’t seen College Mall in a while.

    1. David

      I saw it exactly one week ago, on Monday.

  41. XMD

    I’d like to say I feel sorry for Sierra, just having to stand there.
    But if you look closely, she’s meh before they start making out, but then her lips curve up in a smile as the fanservice happens right next to her.
    ohmigod she’s a fan of this comic
    ohmigod she broke the fourth wall
    ohmigod she’s either deadpool or pinkie pie

    VOTES!

    1. Regalli

      Pinkie Pool, the half-mutant mercenary, half-pony party planner, fourth-wall-breakin’ beast of fun.

      1. Rex Hondo

        Pinkie Pool, the Mare with a Mouth.
        “Now I’m the best at whater it is Applejack does!”

      2. Nerdman

        There’s fanart for that.

    2. Hiredg00n

      I say she’s Pinkie Pool!

      *you are now imagining Deadpool in Pinkie Pie colors with a puffy tail sticking out the back of the uniform*

  42. Barney Stinson

    Billie: the ultimate wingwoman.

  43. historyman68

    Billie is a genius.

  44. Princessanarchy

    Am I the only one who misread “do you want to snag dorothy” as “do you want to shag dorothy”?

  45. nothri

    http://www.shortpacked.com/index.php?id=1731

Leave a Reply to Kernanator Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

*

*

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.