243

Get ready
Posted on October 28, 2014 by David M Willis

243 thoughts on “Get ready”

  1. Jen Aside

    “Can’t decide? Why not both?”

    wait no that would be weird

    1. Jen Aside

      also DAMMIT WILLIS

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      Doesn’t that depend on which state you come from?

    3. Yotomoe

      It works in the south. Boy Howdy.

      1. Viktoria

        Fun fact, you can look up incest laws by state. In general, the north is the most lenient about incest, the south is where it’s banned.

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          That’s gotta count as some kind of irony.

        2. sps48

          Nah. Being illegal makes things more fun!

        3. Doctor_Who

          How do they know they’re doing something right unless the gubmint doesn’t approve?

        4. timemonkey

          Well, you could look at it as the North knows better but in the South they had to actually punish it

        5. KevinGriffin3CD

          It was happening enough for them to make laws against it.

        6. Adam Black

          Not exactly.
          Cousin marriage is legal in most of Dixie, much of the east coast, and a few western states, New mexico and California.

          I assume its illegal in MA because it was never a problem.

          I think most people here just assume its illegal

        7. Deanatay

          No need to pass a law where a crime almost never happens. Statutes on crime are a great way to deduce what crimes happen where. The more complexly worded and loop-holey a statute, the more experience lawmakers have had with a crime.

        8. Wait...

          We’re assuming that lawmakers actually have experience with the things they legislate now? o.O

        9. nooB

          Well, in American law court precedence basically IS law so….
          Then again, I live on another continent, so what do I know

        10. Peregrine

          Honestly? Probably more than most of us.

        11. icepyrox

          so thats why whaling is illegal in Nebraska. got it.

    4. AgentKeen

      I was about to say, why not all three? Wait no bad.

      1. Jen Aside

        The quote that I don’t remember where it’s from is “both,” otherwise that’s what I would’ve said.

        1. J-lee

          It’s from The Running Man.

    5. Aeron

      And weird is wrong because…

      1. Jen Aside

        hey I just said “weird”

        which, uh, means…

        uh

        *side-eyes the door*

  2. Plasma Mongoose

    Beginning of the End of this relationship…

    1. SUGauthor

      Well it was bound to happen sooner or later. I hope they stay in touch.

      1. Vic

        well joicy could have found the gender bender ray from the paralel dimension (or wath ever it was my memory is a wreck)

    2. Captain Lord Knives

      The end is nigh…

    3. Historyman68

      The beginning WAS the end.

      1. Jen Aside

        the beginning is the end is the beginning

    4. Bard

      Thank god.

  3. L33tmaster

    damn come on man just be both

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      You mean a husband and a big brother? KINKY!

      1. Yotomoe

        This sounds like the plot to many hentai’s I’ve viewed.

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          “Onee-SAAAMA!”

        2. Opus the Poet

          Onee-CHANnnnnnnn….

        3. Sylvester Crow

          You got mixed up onee-sama is big sister. You probably are thinking of “Oniiiii-chaaaan!”

        4. Plasma Mongoose

          DoH!

        5. Greyblood

          DoH? Dumbing of Hentai?

        6. SUGauthor

          Huh, I guess I’m never reading hentai ever.

        7. Plasma Mongoose

          Just stick with reading the wholesome ones with the naughty tentacles.

        8. Disloyal Subject

          Consentacles can be pretty adorably sweet.

        9. Mr. Morningstar

          Dear diary today I heard the term “Consentacles” and I am unsure what to make of it.

        10. Rutee

          Consenual sex with a sapient tentacle monster. It makes so much more sense than dudes, really. Its often quite excellent.

        11. Plasma Mongoose

          Consentacles reminds me of Ghastly’s Ghastly Comic: Tentacle Monsters & The Women Who Love Them.

          http://www.ghastlycomic.com/
          Warning: NSFW

        12. Deanatay

          Where there’s tentacles, there’s very rarely any incest. So, yeah.

        13. davidbreslin101

          …unless we’re in Lovecraft territory. People from the Miskatonic region have to put up with jokes about them sleeping with their huge, invisible, tentacled half-brothers.

        14. Disloyal Subject

          Like any medium ever, 90% of it is shit but there are some real gems if you can suck it up and root around in the muck for a few minutes.

        15. Jen Aside

          I saw this awful one where they called each other “sister” and it was VIOLENTLY SUBTITLED to insist THEY WERE NOT ACTUALLY SISTERS

          so I dunno

        16. Yotsuyasan

          Ah, F3: Frantic, Frustrated, and Female. The insistence of the subtitles that they were not sisters, and that their “landlord” was not their mother, despite them continually referring to each other as such, reached almost Pythonesque levels of absurdity… Especially since these insistent disclaiming subtitles did not appear until the second episode, thus the first episode played these familial relationships completely straight. (Or rather, completely lesbian!)

          Cough… Not that I have ever seen it, of course…

        17. gwalla

          Just like how schools in hentai are always “colleges” in translation, despite having homerooms, a set start time for all students, students punsihed by having to stand outside, and students cramming for the entrance exam to get into college.

        18. pyrophobia

          On the other hand, given that non-USA countries often call high school ‘college’ and college ‘university’, that could be playing weirdly into the translation, maybe the translators are having that consistency issue instead. (Plus how they take entrance exams for high school in Japan, too.)

        19. Rutee

          Pseudo-Incest is crazy common. Note the lack of the “in hentai” qualifier.

        20. begbert2

          Well obviously – you wouldn’t want to accidentally exclude Star Wars, would you?

        21. Rutee

          Star Wars wouldn’t even qualify, really. Pseudo-Incest is basically about finding a technically okay reason why the people who are having sex can say “Daddy”, “Sis,” etc. The most common one is step-, in my experience.

        22. davidbreslin101

          Old songs are full of people calling their S.O. things like “Momma”, “Daddy” or “Baby” and this is considered normal and not hideously disturbing AT ALL.

        23. zathael

          A Lannister always pays his debts in bed

        24. Deanatay

          There’s also the fact that the Japanese (as well as many hentai fans) seem to find the phrase ‘oni-chan’ cute and sexy, so many hentai producers have cute little girls saying it to people who demonstrably aren’t their big brothers, just to sell copy.

          *ahem* not that I watch that stuff… *blush*

        25. begbert2

          These not-relationships happen in a fair amount of non-hentai anime too.

        26. gwalla

          Not just hentai. It’s actually fairly common for young kids in Japan to refer to older kids they feel close to as “big brother” or “big sister”.

  4. Khaner

    “A future wife?” Is Joyce turning into Tommy Wieseu?
    “Oh hai Dorothy. haha”

    1. Doctor_Who

      “How is your premarital hanky-panky life?”

      1. Yotomoe

        YOU ARE TEARING ME APART, ETHAN.

        1. -Sentinel-

          Leave your stupid comments in your pocket.

        2. ThisIsSoLemons

          That avatar made that comment so much better

    2. Rutee

      Bad. Wrong. Badong, even.

    3. Pantheon the Mantheon

      I deed not heet her. I DEED NOT!

      1. gwalla

        Oh hi Danny.

    4. Cephalo the Pod

      Don’t touch me mother-f-er.

    5. laurenh

      Everyone betray me, I don’t have a friend in the world….

  5. Khaner

    “A future wife?” Is Joyce turning into Tommy Wieseu?
    “Oh hai Dorothy. haha”

    1. Totz the Plaid

      “YOU’RE TEARING ME APART, ETHAN!!!”

      1. Kryss LaBryn

        Wow, deja vu.

        1. auo> mous

          Can’t read your alt-text on my phone, but you may notice by the timestamps that Totz actually beat Yotomoe to the punch.
          So Totz wins I guess?

      2. gwalla

        Leave your stupid comments in your pocket.

        1. pyrophobia

          That avatar made the comment so much better.

          In other news, if Sara and mike had a jerk contest, I wonder who’d win.

    2. Potatamoto

      Even if you had to edit out the interminable ‘love’ scenes, I would LOVE to see Joyce’s reaction to ‘The Room.’

  6. boomwolf

    Something tells me it won’t be wife.

    1. Paul

      I think that Joyce has figured this out for herself. Their relationship made sense, in a weird self-deluded way, but it couldn’t outlast the delusions.

    2. Jen Aside

      Maybe he’s holding out for husband??

      HEY JOYCE, WANNA JOIN YOUR SIBLING IN AN EXCITING ADVENTURE BUT THE REVERSE

      1. Cephalo the Pod

        HEY ADVENTURE, WANNA EXCITE YOUR SIBLING IN A JOINING JOYCE?

    3. hof1991

      Joyce’s best hope is sister-in-law.

  7. burntnorris

    Joyce why.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      She wants the PMHP and is starting to realise that Ethan won’t be providing her with it.

    2. Cephalo the Pod

      Well hey at least Joyce is being upfront about what she wants.

  8. Poskie

    Joyce, you don’t just go around asking gay boys to marry you…

    1. begbert2

      Well, you can, but it’s likely to turn out poorly as often as not.

    2. CrazyJ

      Of course there could be a practical reason for a gay student to say yes though.

      Let’s say he was a dependent student whose parents made too much to get financial aid, getting married would put him in the independent category and allow him to qualify for Pell grants, which at close to six grand a year over a four year college education would add up to nearly twenty six thousand he wouldn’t have gotten otherwise, all for signing a marriage contract.

      1. Jen Aside

        YAY THAT SANCTITY OF MARRIAGE

        1. Jen Aside

          though it’s a thing for, say, Chinese gay/lesbian friends to agree to marry (but secretly keep their same-sex partners) just to get their parents to stop hassling them about marrying… though managing kids is a different matter

        2. pyrophobia

          Next time, on Sanctity of Marriage: Gays Who Marry Straight!

          Next time, on Sanctity of Marriage: Straight, Married, and Childless!

          Next time, on Sanctity of Marriage: “I Married My Cousin!”

      2. Inlaa

        To think I thought all the kids getting married at the end of High School were nuts when in reality they may have been working the system to get money for college. Hindsight 20/20.

        1. Jae

          That’s not why all of us did it, but it was certainly a perk to the timing.

  9. Tunaro

    So to review: Walky and Dorry are fightin’, Bills an’ Ruth are in a Sexy Lesbian Suicicde Pact, Amber and DANNY are happy, secret datin’, Joyce is having a breakdown and Ethan is massively repressed.
    And it’s still only Monday night.
    This is gonna be a looong ass week, isn’t it?

    1. jess

      prediction: Joyce finds out about Walky and Dorothy fighting, concludes that “See! Premarital sex DOES cause problems!”, and retreats back into her bubble of previously held beliefs for a while.

      Also, don’t forget that Mary saw Billie furtively leave Ruth’s room

      1. Historyman68

        I could see that.

    2. Adam Black

      longer if Blaine gets out if the Hospital

      1. pyrophobia

        OH GOD
        I FORGOT ABOUT THAT

    3. Deanatay

      Mike: Hello, roomie! How was your day?
      Walky: Well, Dorothy told me she loved me, and I told her I loved her, too. Now we’re both angry and miserable.
      Mike: Good thing I started drinking early!

    4. Cephalo the Pod

      It’s always a long-ass week.

    5. Dirk Strider's Splinter Hopeself

      Hey, DanBer isn’t completely sacred, either. Ethan and Danny have some sort of hots for each other.

  10. dailybrad

    Sarah’s warming up an I-Told-You-So, surely. Tossing it in a crockpot. Low and slow, that’s the best way to get that lip-smacking good flavor.

    1. saltchocolate

      I miss Sarah! Also, I thought it was so sweet yesterday when Joyce predicted that Sarah and Jacob will end up together, despite Sarah’s inability to believe in her own loveableness. I hope so, and I hope Joyce knows she’s loveable, too.

      1. chris73

        Great for Sarah sure but whats in it for Jacob?

        1. SgtWadeyWilson

          Not getting unalived by Sarah, or just maybe Joyce?
          …
          …
          Oh, wait, I think I said that backwards.

  11. liahansen

    Maybe I’ve just been spoiled by Billie/Ruth, Walky/Sal, Sarah/everyone, but these guys drama seems incredibly subdued.

    1. Tunaro

      Chill, chill, it’s like shakin’ a bottle a’ Coke. Just gotta wait for the pressure to build to max and burst the top.

    2. Dean

      A volcano seems subdued as well. Until it isn’t.

    3. saltchocolate

      You misspelled “repressed.”

    4. dreadedseamonster

      It’s pretty extreme in its own way. A lot of their issues are things that are directed towards themselves, like Joyce’s issues with her own sexual desires and Ethan’s fear that he’ll never be “normal.” But until they resolve those things neither of them will be able to have healthy relationships. They’re never going to result in sexy suicide pacts, but they will result in a lot of sad feelings.

    5. Cephalo the Pod

      I’m holding out on Sarah’s prediction back in page 16 of Book 3 Chapter 3.

      “If anybody else finds out you’re doing this, they will not stand for it. You will lose them. You willespecially lose Dorothy.”

      Sure, these two won’t rattle each other like other pairs, but the outside workd won’t take kindly to it.

      1. liahansen

        oh riiiiight, I hadn’t thought about that

  12. newllend

    And there it is the truth surface’s and he backs down

  13. Brigid Keely

    “See? you can have what Dorothy has: a guy who throws around the word “love” because that’s what you do to level up the relationship.”

    1. Yotomoe

      But damn if we aren’t charming.

    2. mschmidt62

      I think you have something there.

    3. begbert2

      Except Walky threw it out specifically to derail the leveling up that Dorothy had been trying to engage in.

  14. Yotomoe

    I love you as a beard. You’re a really nice beard. Don’t have to shave you or nuthin’.

    1. Dean

      Now I’m picturing a bald Joyce. Thanks for making it weird.

      1. chris73

        Now I’m thinking of a bald Joyce as well but probably in a different light

      2. Yotsuyasan

        Well, I suppose dating Ethan is a way of having her oath of celibacy on record, so the bald look could work with that! (Now to time how long it takes someone to get the reference…)

        1. NotPiffany

          Man, I hope she doesn’t do that. Willis would have to start putting in a lot of filler to dilute the plot to the point that it matched Star Trek: The Motion Picture.

          (Which would probably have been a decent episode, but oh my stars, it made a terrible movie.)

      3. Inlaa

        …Bald women can be super hot, guys. Guys, I serious. Guys?

        1. Tenn

          Well, Sigourney Weaver has never been hotter than in Alien 3.

          And I actually typed that entire sentence before realizing that it doubles as a horrifying pun. o_o

        2. TFC

          Sorry, lack of experience.

  15. Emperor Kiva

    Well I think she’ll be fine now. And as for those choices if I were dating her. It’d be whichever she wants.

    1. tinfoil theory

      But she doesn’t want to want what she wants! Why do you have to go and corrupt her? What would Becky say?

      1. Emperor Kiva

        Only you would say that.

      2. Emperor Kiva

        And I don’t care what Becky says. Screw Becky

  16. Idon'tcarenomore

    God I hope this is the beginning of the end for this relationship.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Me too.

      1. Sylvester Crow

        Yeah! Let us sail the Ethan/Danny ship!

        1. Dirk Strider's Splinter Hopeself

          Aw HELL yeah. Pull the main-halyard and connect the blocks! It’s about to sail!

        2. xKiv

          The Dethany?

        3. Emperor Kiva

          That sounds like a rejected album title by Dethklok

    2. Annamal

      I hope this is the beginning of the end of their *romantic* relationship.

      They make such wonderful friends and they can compare notes on parental nastiness.

      1. begbert2

        And prenatal nastiness, which is how I read that at first.

    3. OnnaStik

      The beginning of the relationship was the beginning of the end for this relationship.

      1. CrazyJ

        Perhaps the beginning is the end is the beginning for this relationship. Maybe that’s where Batman fits into all of this.

    4. hof1991

      Relationships are facing facts this arc. Dorothy and Walky have to decide whether it is just for fun. Joyce and Ethan will have to settle for best gay friend. Ruth and Billie need to remove suicidal from the relationship. Because none of these are ready to go the distance until they do.

      1. pyrophobia

        And Amber and Danny have to face facts about the whole Amazi-Girl thing, each in their own way.

  17. Hannah

    Oh good, I was waiting for this relationship to hit the rocks. They may have had the right to choose to be with each other if they wanted, but that doesn’t change the fact that it was just a really bad idea right from the start.

    Farewell, EthanxJoyce, you should never have been a thing in the first place. :l

    1. Adam Black

      I think its just started showing its potential;

      I dont want it to end prematurely. I don’t want to drag it out for its own sake, only because it could be therapeutic for both charcters

  18. ChocolateRat

    Poor everyone. Hugs? I wonder who would be better for helping Joyce right now, if anyone. Maybe her sister could since she’s likely been through some similar thoughts.

  19. chris73

    Well done Joyce for asking the question you don’t want the answer to but asking it anyway

    1. newllend

      More like that question she’s neglected to ask for a while.

      1. chris73

        I don’t know I mean how long has she really known hes gay? Less then two weeks I’m guessing so shes doing well given her background I’m guessing…

        1. Catullus

          It’s been about 8.5 days

        2. NotPiffany

          Hasn’t she known he’s gay for the entire length of the (theoretically romantic) relationship?

        3. lipstick_suckerpunch

          That’s what I thought too.

  20. Idon'tcarenomore

    Dailybrad, I don’t think Sarah is like that. She does not revel in turning the screw in people she cares for or ones she doesn’t actually.
    Sarah is a realist. She tells it like she see’s it without sweetening it up.
    More like:
    “Joyce, you’re an idiot, you know this is wrong for you and I’m sorry you’re hurt but, damn girl, you gotta move on’

    1. dailybrad

      I was mostly teasing. Sarah does care about Joyce quite a bit, basically her little sister of sorts, but she still told her from day one this was a shitty idea for both parties. She has admitted she has some “I told you so” in her, but that the time she really wanted to do it, the gravity of the situation was far too grave for it, with the drugging incident.

  21. Kernanator

    Could it be? Is the break up finally here?

    1. newllend

      Keep you fingers and don’t stop believing, its almost over

    2. Morty

      Not yet, I think. This seems like a precursor to the actual decline of the relationship. Probably there’s going to be another steamy situation with Danny at some point in the future that’s going to cause 1) Danny to critically re-examine his sexuality, and 2) cause Ethan to finally admit to himself that it’s just not healthy for him to try to force himself into a heterosexual relationship.
      Or alternately, it’ll cause Joyce (and Amber?) to talk him through the fact that its not fair to him or the women he’d be with to keep up the pretense

      We’re definitely closer to the end than the beginning though

    3. Leorale

      I dunno. I feel like the slingshot hasn’t pulled back far enough yet for the maximum amount of stinging pain.

      Ethan really ought to talk to somebody about what he’s doing and feeling. And his only possible confidant is Danny. This is my horrible, monstrous hope.

  22. KevinGriffin3CD

    The left side of your computer screen is filthy.

    1. Yu'Karaya

      With that avatar and that smudge right in front of her face, that was perfect for me.

    2. Mr. Morningstar

      mine actually IS filthy.

      I should probably clean it.

  23. Jacob Newburn

    And this is the part of the story where everything goes downhill and everyone screams “DAMN YOU WILLIS!!!!!” isn’t it? ‘Cause I’ll be legitimately surprised if it takes a turn for the better… Maybe Ruth and Billie get together and Marry only wants to throw them a big ‘ol Ice Cream party with a petting zoo and laser tag… Maybe Walky and Dorothy will realize the power of love through an 80’s power ballad… Maybe Joyce will find a nice boyfriend and not have her heart crushed… Maybe Ethan will find a nice boyfriend also… Maybe just this once… Just this once, everybody is happy… goddammit…

    1. Pantheon the Mantheon

      Don’t you see Rose? Just this once, nobody had to die!

    2. Mass Confusion

      Yeah, and maybe Mike will stop being an asshole!

      1. Adam Black

        thats the easiest part to fix

      2. sanddorn

        Poor Mickey, not even his name’s right.

  24. Yu'Karaya

    I want to be mad at Joyce for fueling the gay denial in Ethan and want to say she had it coming for trying to start a doomed relationship with someone who couldn’t be romantically attracted to her, but I can feel the hurt in loving someone who just isn’t into your gender.

    1. dailybrad

      They’re not bad people, just… deeply flawed. But they’re working on it, Joyce particularly.

      Ethan owes it to himself to be trying a fuckload of a lot harder than he is, though.

    2. Mr. Morningstar

      to be fair tho ethan DID agree to the relationship knowing full well he is not and will not be attracted to her. And essentially is just stringing her along, for a beard, to keep his parents happy.

      They are both being stupid but you cant help but feel sorry for both there situations.

      1. Yu'Karaya

        Yeah, you’re right, Ethan is kinda at fault for this two. So they’re both just using each other and nobody is gonna be happy in the end =/

        1. Slinx

          I mean, at the end of the day, it’s not really a romance. They are basically in this relationship because they want some companionship but can’t handle a romantic relationship right now, for various reasons. One major reason Joyce is unhappy right now is because she is lonely. Ending this relationship wont make her any happier “in the end” until the other issues are sorted out.

  25. GoSpeedRumpist

    And suddenly Joyce is starting to realize the implications of dating a gay guy.

  26. Lanval

    Lil’ Sister in Law if all goes well for Ethan. I’mjussaying.

    1. auo> mous

      The only sibling we’ve met is Jocelyne. I don’t think Ethan wants to date another girl, even a male-bodied one.

      1. Jen Aside

        To be fair, we were never given room to see Ethan really process that revelation, like, “…yeah, but I’d still hit that.” (or not?)

  27. Dave

    Good job, Ethan. >_<

  28. Leorale

    Man. Joyce was raised to only see within a particular worldview, but then she has these highly perceptive moments, and it’s tough. DYW.

    1. Dorje Sylas

      That’s the problem with legitimately smart people. They start connecting logic dots as new information comes along. Its so very hard to keep them mindlessly leashed to dogmatic ideals once out of a hermetically sealed echo chamber.

      What’s truely horrible is that they don’t get equipped with the tools to properly handle that input. The most important skill is learning how to learn. The methods and process of finding, evaluating, and integrating new information against what you already know. Without practice early you can end up in a cascade of questioning everything you’ve ever known because so much is in conflict with what you’re experiencing.

  29. Neonix

    We know what that means. Don’t say “we can still be friends” either, because we know what that means too, Ethan.

  30. Em

    Good girl Joyce. Glad you’re actually thinking now. Alright, so what you gotta do now it break it off with Ethan and encourage him to be who he was meant to be.

    1. tinfoil theory

      A nerdy Transformers fan-boy.

      1. Em

        Yes

  31. NF

    The feels. All of the feels!

  32. Bob

    Out of all the Dumbing characters, Joyce is the one I’m least fond of.

    1. Jen Aside

      WHAT, HOW CAN YOU LIKE BLAINE MORE

      OR FAZ OR MARY EVEN

    2. dreadedseamonster

      I just feel really bad for her. I’ve seen people who grew up as sheltered as she is, and it’s really tough for them to process the world around them.

      1. Bob

        I’ve had friends who have lived as sheltered a life as Joyce has been shown having, yet they are more understanding in the world. Way I see Joyce is like a brainwashed cult member rather then just a devoted Christian. To me she isn’t even trying to process a world outside the blind faith she has been raised in.

  33. David

    I don’t see she has to “break it off” with Ethan or whatever. I think she is doing pretty well, actually. She just has to figure out “its” place. It’s sort of disappointing that Ethan decides to run rather than help with that. But then it’s also sort of defining the limits of what she can expect of Ethan. I think he could do better than that in the “friend” department. Heck, even in the “big brother” department.

    1. Henry

      I thought he was running because he thinks Joyce guessed that he was attracted to her “brother”, and he’s worried he might accidentally spill Jocelyne’s secret to Joyce if he starts trying to explain why he’s not going to leave her for her “brother.”

  34. Malchus

    Neither of the above! You’re an adorable YouTube hamster, Joyce, and bibles are your tiny burritos.

    1. pyrophobia

      Parry Gripp? 😀

  35. OnyxIdol

    I got really mad at Ethan in panel three for a moment. Promising Joyce the same “as Dorothy” sounded an awful lot like clinging to their stupid charade. Luckily, Joyce called him out for it immadiately.

  36. datkgloomie

    Whoa Ethan, are you a Pokemon? ‘Cause you just got BURNED!

    (yes, I choose to quip insyead of focusing on drama or potential thereof)

    1. Cephalo the Pod

      PARALYZED with fear!
      This relationship is POISONED. FROZEN in it’s tracks!
      SLEEP!

      1. cesium133

        JOYCE woke up!
        JOYCE used DRAMA!
        It’s super-effective!

  37. TheZachariah

    Man, Ethan is just Danning it up all over the place. He’s starting to out-Dan Danny. Heck, he’s even Danning it up with Danny.

    1. Dirk Strider's Splinter Hopeself

      What happened between Ethan and Danny wasn’t Danning-ish at all. It was perfect.

      1. Slinx

        Right up until the end when they both Danned things up a bunch. I like your name, by the way.

        1. TheZachariah

          Yeah, the part at the end was the Danning, where Ethan found the deepest closet he could and hid beneath some big ‘ol woolen coats, that would be what I was referring to.

  38. Heavensrun

    Oh, gods, I want to hug them both so bad right now.

  39. Adam Black

    oh, Ethan; so close!

    This could have gone a lot worse. I was expecting her to say I love your first, romantically; ,and Joyce’s drama-hurricane factor to go way up, maybe up to 3, maybe all the way up to Billieforce.

    This could have been a Damn-You-Willis moment of epic proportions.

    1. Adam Black

      that should say ‘i was expecting Joyce to say “i love you” romantically FIRST —thus putting Ethan in a bind, and setting us for courses under water

      His save wasnt bad. But it wasnt great. It was an inoculation , not a cure

  40. Whittier

    Gosh, I know so many couples who endured the heartbreak of entering into just such marriages. I feel for both the Joyces and the Ethans in the world.

    1. JessWitt

      Marriages where one loved the other as a friend or sibling, but not romantically. Damn, I didn’t consider that notion. It’s existentially shattering.

  41. Ikaru

    Damn you Wills! *shakes fist*

  42. madock345

    The number of DYWes going around lately have made me remember something you might find interesting: Almost all fatal brain aneurysms occur in the part of the brain called the “Circle of Willis”

    This has lead me to conclude that you are actually trying to murder us all by inducing such a level of DYW that fatal brain aneurysms occur.

    1. Jen Aside

      D=

      *MIND BLOWN*

      1. Mr. Morningstar

        Dammit there goes another one.

  43. Lulu

    Who else wants to see Joyce pester Billie for a while and try to get relationship advice from her asking all the time about her boyfriend?
    I just need some laugh after seeing this page.

    1. Cephalo the Pod

      Get Dina in here, stat!

      1. TheZachariah

        She’s probably already there.

  44. Orangey

    Kind of an unfair thing to say there Ethan. You both know that Joyce can’t have the same thing with you that Dorothy and Walky can have, and I’m glad Joyce brought him up on it. Hopefully this relationship can end soon!

  45. Kevin

    I love you like a man loves a children’s cartoon

    1. winter

      I don’t think you know how much some men (and women) love children’s cartoons.

  46. Orangey

    Ethan’s character is interesting though, Joyce has always been a lot stronger than Ethan was. When Joyce entered this relationship, she did it because she thought she could help him and help herself with their own ‘bad urges’, whereas Ethan did it because woo free beard.

    And now when Joyce starts to realise maybe this is never going to work and starts doubting herself, instead of really talking it out, Ethan runs away. I like Ethan, I think he’s a nice guy and he’s been supportive of Joyce when she needs him, but he doesn’t have that courage that Joyce has. Which is even something he brings up! I don’t know, it’s just interesting to see how different these two are.

    I mean he’s taking an easy way out here by trying to make her feel better by saying he loves her too, but it’s still not addressing the problems Joyce has. but bla bla bla interesting characters are good /ramble

    1. Leorale

      Agreed. Joyce is secretly very strong, especially emotionally, whereas Ethan is like Chik-Fil-A. Bawk, bawk, bawk.

      I don’t think Ethan’s in it solely for the beard, though, I think he also likes being close to people and taking care of them, which he can’t do for Amber right now. And they’re both afraid of being alone.

      This whole comic series is, basically, let’s set up a bunch of very distinct people and watch ’em bounce off of each other in interesting ways. It is my favourite.

      1. Regalli

        Yeah, I think Ethan’s definitely getting the caring and looking out for someone bit out of this that he wants, he’s just not ready to admit yet that he wants a boyfriend, too.

        Also, distinct lack of available males. There’s that too.

        1. chisci

          basically he really tries to care for people but has no damn clue how to take care of himself, and that makes him not know either how to take care of other people, or something

  47. Anywhere

    best frustrated queer-platonic couple in comics

  48. Zaxares

    I told you. I TOLD you this relationship could only end in tears.

    1. Lulu

      Every relationship ever ends in tears one way or another.

      1. Leorale

        Unless you sorta just lose touch over time. Or if you die simultaneously. Happily ever after!

      2. Killjoy

        Yeap — there are no happy endings.

  49. Zero2Kate

    Oh shit.

    She saw right through that gaze at Joshua, huh.

    1. TJ Baltimore

      That is how I interpreted the last of Joyce’s options, although of course you mean Jocelyne, not Joshua.

  50. Doom Shepherd

    Sis-zoned! Also, cis-zoned!

    1. pyrophobia

      +1

  51. JessWitt

    Good on Joyce to pull the figurative trigger. The wait’s so excruciating.

  52. Phlebas

    Joyce and Ethan both have issues coming to terms with being friends of Dorothy?
    THEY HAVE SO MUCH IN COMMON

    1. Regalli

      Ah, Dorothy’s name. Truly the gift that keeps on giving.

  53. hof1991

    I know that DYW plans things out a loooooooooong way in advance, but did he plan for all the Friends of Dorothy jokes?

    1. xKiv

      Didn’t he start them?

  54. wattheheck

    These people have known each other for a month. ONE MONTH. And yet they’re all talking about how they love each other. That’s crazy fast even for hormonal teenagers or at-college-to-get-an-MRS. These people should be applying the brakes big-time when someone they’ve known for a few weeks claims to love them. Because that’s a Crazy Person Indicator.

    (If you want character development, go ahead and timejump forward. We don’t have to spend three months on every single day of their academic lives.)

    1. Killjoy

      Technically true, but I think there has to be some allowance made for the time-stretched format of a comic.

    2. pyrophobia

      I thought the point was that they’re all crazy…
      Or at least being driven crazy by their unsorted baggage.

  55. Synnerman

    Aw man, too early to be feeling things.

  56. NaYa

    To be fair, even if he was hetero, if you ask “future wife?” to a college freshman he might run off…

    1. Sam

      Hahahah…true.

  57. Slinx

    Ethan, noooooooo. Stop saying what you think she wants to hear and say something that actually makes sensssssssse.

  58. chris73

    Ethan you dropped the ball big time in panel 3 unless you really don’t know what the hell Joyce actually wants

  59. zmm

    ya’kno what.

    Joyce is pretty aware of how things are at least considering she felt the need to ask those 3 specific choices..

    1. chris73

      Do you think the last question was a reference to her brother or just as how Ethan sees her?

      1. Reaver

        Y’ mean her Sister?

        1. Slinx

          I took it as a reference to her relationship with Sarah.

  60. Darnel

    Good thing he’s “good”.

  61. DA Amron

    Damn Joyce,
    I know its in her nature, but damn, why do i have the feeling that this Joyce is going to end up being hurt worse in the long run than the alien-fighting rebel who came to her senses eventually?

  62. Betty_Smith

    Weaving the confusion in love… well this is interesting and typical! Typical because with men, we can predict such behavior 🙂 My deepest regards with Joyce..I can see what will happen with her. BTW, Thanks for sharing this awesome webcomic!

  63. OmegaDez

    For a second there I was confused as to what Dorothy was trying to say.
    I got that she’s asking if he likes her as a wife or a friend or a sister, but I initially thought she was actually saying HE was “wife” or “sister” material because she thought he was girly or whatever. I was like DAMN, girl, that’s cold. @_@

Leave a Reply to David Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

*

*

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.