457

Get
Posted on January 31, 2016 by David M Willis

457 thoughts on “Get”

  1. butts

    Wow, letting her drive the car? Cool dad points, through the roof.

    1. Tabitha Desanto

      We will see how that lasts.

    2. DarkoNeko

      Wait, can she drive properly with her damaged wrist ?

      1. random832

        Her other hand works. As long as it’s an automatic she should be fine.

      2. LongDistanceDriver

        It’s possible to drive using only your wrists. Never doubt the power of boredom.

        1. Ana Chronistic

          I tend to drive one-handed

          …NO, not because I’m this guy, because I only feel like I might lose control of the car if I’m speeding, and if I’m not speeding, I don’t *need* both hands on the wheel (but my other hand is just in my lap or over the heater b/c it’s cold, not holding a phone or whatever other unsafe practices)

        2. Spencer

          I do that too, though I occasionally remember that I’m driving a massive pile of metal at 80km/h and I could actually kill somebody if I don’t pay enough attention.

          Driving was not an easy adaptation for me.

        3. Ana Chronistic

          oh this is highway driving, I use both hands if I have to turn any time soon

      3. Julez

        It’s been a week, and it was only a sprain. She’s probably fine by now.

        1. Jhon

          “only a sprain” — Always see a doctor and get an X-ray. It’s possible to break a bone in your wrist or ankle without realizing it. And have big trouble in later life.

        2. JetstreamGW

          … She did see a doctor.

        3. FireSTK

          Sprains can both be more painful and can take much longer to heal than breaks. Never underestimate an injury

    3. Plasma Mongoose

      HE letting her drive because driving long distances isn’t awesome, it’s tiresome.

      1. inqntrol

        Exactly, most parents want their kids to get a driving license because of that.

        1. Gordon Blvd

          whelp, gotta admit that a lot of parents these days are old people too lol

        2. Felix

          As well as so they would have a sober driver at the reach of a phone.

        3. Christine

          That and/or because they get a DD for family parties.

  2. LimeSheep

    legitimately surprised she can drive. am i the only one who keeps forgetting shes an adult?

    1. LimeSheep

      also my dad is always pulling this on me but i actually hate driving. *shakes fists at dads*

      1. -Sentinel-

        Back when I was a teen, and my parents made me drive for practice, I didn’t like driving. Made me nervous. Later I got my own car, and as habit set in, I eventually got to like driving (provided I’m on a road worth driving on).

        1. CleverTrousers

          Quite so good chaps.

      2. Palamdrone

        My dad also does this. It wouldn’t be so bad if he weren’t the world’s worst back seat driver.

      3. ganymedeanoutlaw

        Kinda the opposite of my dad. One time in 20 years I’ve seen him in a car with someone else behind the wheel.

        He hated it.

    2. DarkoNeko

      It really shows the difference of treatement between Joyce and Becky there. And it shows it didn’t just start following their argument during parent’s day.

    3. Milli

      I was surprised. Not because I forget that she’s an adult, but because I know so many adults who can’t drive because of the expense involved. Driving never came up, and we see them having adequate public transportation, so I figured most of the main cast just never bothered.

      1. Clay

        Let me guess – you aren’t from the Midwest?

        1. Stara

          Or large parts of the East Coast

        2. No Name

          Or anyplace that isn’t a major city with cheap and plentiful public transportation.

    4. Andrusi

      I keep forgetting any of the main characters are adults. My brain considers college to be a late stage of childhood.

      1. Fred

        I’m attending college (and working on the same campus in the IT department) as someone in my forties. It took me quite a while to train myself to not refer to other students as “kids,” especially since some of my coworkers do it. I’ve never had anyone say anything about it, but it help me remember that these students are adults, even if I do have a crockpot that’s older than most of them.

  3. AnvilPro

    I like seeing just plain happy Joyce again. Can’t wait til they get home for something to ruin it

    1. Edupoet81

      Those were pretty much my thoughts exactly.

    2. DarkoNeko

      So basically, up to where they meet her mom

    3. Chrissy

      Get home? I’m wondering if she will be able to drive over that bridge…

  4. Badluck1313

    The Fast and the Holiest?

    1. Harvey Janus

      The Pious and the Righteously Furious?

      1. David Herbert

        And the sequel, 2 Pious 2 Righteous.

        1. Screwball

          Naaa, the “2 Righteous” bit was Toedad’s kidnapping attempt & the resulting chase. Would that make #1 Sal making a “get away” from Amazigirl (without even realizing it), then the face-off in the carpark? I guess THAT would make this #3, Joyce Drift, as in she’s out of practice & has a tendency to drift across lanes… 😛

        2. Deanatay

          2 Good for this world 2 pure

        3. Amazi-Stool

          +1 Perfect rear roll!

  5. Tabitha Desanto

    Dad is gonna have a fun ride for his life with joyce driving and becky co pilot

    1. Doctor_Who

      Becky: Now ramp that cop car.

      Joyce: On it!

      Hank: ZZzzzZZ…

      1. Reltzik

        It’s the power of scary teenage driving versus the power of old-person naps!

        1. ChrisHerself

          But what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object?

        2. thejeff

          Hoppable Force!

      2. EvilMidnightLurker

        “Man…is only separated from heaven by that which he will not ramp.”
        –Dr. McNinja

    2. TheGrammarLegionary

      Please, we all know Jesus is still Joyce’s copilot.

      1. CheredisTyping

        Yeah but he’s holding on to the bongo handle

  6. Someone

    Does piloting giant mechas count as driving?

    1. Tacos

      Iunno. Why not as Shinji or a Power Ranger?

    2. Reltzik

      Depends. It might instead count as flying.

      1. Screwball

        Hmmm, someone find me a giant Mecha, I need to test this theory out…

        …And 1 for Daniel the Human too, that might stop him death-glaring me…

        1. EvilMidnightLurker

          Is there a Transtector or two lying around your base?

        2. EvilMidnightLurker

          (Then I thought “that’s creepy, it’s like piloting a human’s brainless corpse.” Then I thought “headmasters plus transtectors equals TRANSFORMERS: ATTACK ON TITAN.” O.o; )

        3. Screwball

          Well, there are transformers which become heads for other transformers, I hear there’s even a guy who becomes a head for a transformer who then becomes the head of an even bigger transformer… O_O

        4. EvilMidnightLurker

          I did *say* headmasters….

        5. Deanatay

          Wait, aren’t you already a… actually, do Transformers consider themselves mechs?

        6. Screwball

          Eh, can be used for male Cybertronians, but also works for Battle Suits. Besides, I’m only 3 feet tall normally, I like a larger suit to work in… 😛

  7. DarkoNeko

    JOYCE HAS A DRIVING LICENCE ?!

    1. Cacturne

      Guys she IS an eighteen year old girl in college, of course she has a license.

      1. Harvey Janus

        I’m a 20 year old guy in college and I only have a learner’s permit…

        1. a snow ʍousɐ

          Me too

        2. a snow ʍousɐ

          …Also, due to psychological scarring during my first semester, I commute from home. So my mom drives me everywhere. At least she’s used to it, I was homeschooled for my high-school years and had to be driven to different classes.

        3. a snow ʍousɐ

          I guess technically I could drive. But you know, relatively busy streets.

      2. Tacos

        Eh it’s not like it’s a rule. I didn’t get my license until I was 20.

      3. Smiling Cat

        I’m a thirty six year old guy well out of college and I don’t have a license.

        1. Screwball

          Daniel the Human isn’t that old, but he’s apparently never gotten past something called a “learners permit”. Something about instructors not showing up for tests, then being “medically unfit to drive”, then red tape, bla bla bla. I just tuned out till he threw more magnets at me…

        2. Rusty

          Near on 26 now and still no intentions of driving any time soon. Or ever.

        3. DarkVeghetta

          29 here and nope, not driving anytime soon. I theoretically know how to, but didn’t care enough to pass my exam and to be honest I just haaate the idea of having to drive. I’d much rather go by train/bus/bike/walk.
          If anything, might get a motorcycle license eventually – no rush though.

      4. Wublub

        I’m 19 and in college, and I don’t even have a permit. And Joyce is way more sheltered than me, so I just… I don’t know, I can’t imagine her driving.

        1. ScarvesandCelery

          She is sheltered, but she’s sheltered in terms of her parents not wanting to “expose” her to the “evils” of evolution, homosexuality, media that “encourages witchcraft” like Frozen (or was that just Becky?). In short, she’s sheltered in terms of what she’s allowed to know about the world, the information she’s exposed to. But she did note early in the strip that her youth pastor said she was the “best socialised” out of her circle of homeschooled kids. Which isn’t surprising it has been hinted that her family are comparatively reasonable for a fundie family. See Joyce being allowed a mobile phone while Becky isn’t. It doesn’t surprise me that Joyce would be allowed to learn how to drive. Heck, I know Christians my age who were homeschooled but learned how to drive early.
          Heck, the relatively sensible nature of the Browns is sort of the point of the webcomic. Unlike Toedad, they are an example of a reasonable, and from a certain perspective*, kind and loving Christian fundamentalist family. And they are still deeply affected by the more toxic beliefs of fundie culture. In a way that will inevitably cause conflict over the course of this weekend.
          *I use the phrase “from a certain perspective” with great care here – while the Browns can be a functional family, it’s a very tenuous functionality. There’s no way I could call moments like the “passive aggressive prayer circle for Dorothy” or Joyce’s Mum’s “I would die for you” anything other than emotionally manipulative, and a sign that they’re a long way from a healthy family group. I’m just saying that they’re far from the simplistic portrait of fundie culture Willis is (unfairly) accused of writing.

        2. Cerberus

          This.

          And it’s keeping with controlling fundie families where I grew up. Where I grew up had a strong culture, so everyone was taught to drive, but there were often strict curfews in place for when people were to be home and strict controls at home and strong encouragements of what kind of friends were acceptable and they were allowed to spend time with. I was some weird exception to a “only fellow tribe members” rule because I was seen by a lot of parents as being a good academic influence and as a means by which their children could practice their evangelism (they did not actually do this).

          Some families were more like Toedad though, very controlling, not always teaching them to drive and if so, with very strict curfews where they needed to come home immediately after school and where they were very much under lock and key so as to “keep them pure” for their “future husbands”.

        3. Cerberus

          *strong car culture, that is rather than strong culture in general

        4. Dr. T

          I think you are ignoring the fact that she grew up in Indiana. Even the few cities that have a public transportation system don’t do a great job getting you around town. Some are better than others (Bloomington is miles better at it than Lafayette, for instance), but for the most part if you go anywhere someone has to drive.

      5. Reltzik

        Well maybe not “of course”, but certainly not implausible. Especially if she’s from a more rural part of the country where you can’t take the subway or buses everywhere.

        You know, like the SF Bay Area. Stupid Bay Area.

        1. Betty Anne

          I’m a rural bumpkin my whole life, and I didn’t have my license until I was 18 and went to college. My parents didn’t want me to drive, because they were better able to keep me at home and monitor who I talked to, what I did, where I went, etc that way.

          Kind of like fundie parents who are afraid of “Satan’s” influence on their kids. Mine were just atheist parents who were afraid of “everyone else’s” influence on their kids.

      6. Deanatay

        I’ve found that college-age driving is not as universal a skill as popular culture depicts it to be. Many college students simply don’t bother with it.

        1. David M Willis

          Indiana University does not permit underclassmen to have cars on campus. Or motorcycles, but Sal’s a rebel.

        2. Spencer

          I like to think this is Sal’s given reason for when someone questions having it on campus.

        3. Julez

          Even when they are allowed to, at most schools commuters are the majority car owners. Most residents don’t bother, with how easy it is to not have to leave campus.

        4. Captain Button

          No idea what it is like at IU, but my impression is that competition for parking permits and space can be quite brutal on campus.

        5. Dr. T

          I don’t know if that is completely correct. All freshman whose permanent address is not within 50 miles are required to live in a dorm and the only parking pass they can get is a residential pass for the dorm parking lots. Students who live closer than that can get a more broad parking pass. Grad students like Jason and Penny can get faculty passes.

      7. ObiKemnebi

        I’m twenty-four, well out of college, and don’t even have a permit. And I live in a place with /far/ less public transportation options than I’ve seen in this comic. I walk everywhere I can (and by “can”, I mean in two hours walking time or less, which is pretty much everything I need to get to on a regular basis) and on rare occasion toss a friend gas money for a ride to farther away things, like an appointment in the next city. Driving isn’t really that necessary a skill, and I save a crap ton of money from not having to buy gas or perform maintenance or repairs on a machine I don’t really need.

        1. thejeff

          Well, 2 hours is a bit much on a regular basis. By that standard, I could walk to work, but it would probably be an hour and half each way and I’m not really willing to add an unpaid 3 hours to my working day. Especially not in the rain or dark and below freezing.
          Not to mention things like 45 minutes or so to the grocery store, which gets even more often if you can only buy as much as you can carry at once.

          Mind you, I do bike to work a good chunk of the summer, which is nice, but 40 degrees is about my limit for that.

        2. ObiKemnebi

          My walk to work is 45 min each way, but I have had to add an extra five hours daily walking time to my work day when I had two jobs. There’s a dollar store literally in the next parking lot to my apartment, and an actual grocery store about 15 minutes away. I have awesome cold gear as well, so I walk home in the dark regularly and in the winter, it doesn’t bother me unless it drops below 0F. I’ve tried biking before, but because I live in the Colorado foothills, it actually made the travel harder. After a while (and after the painful 12 hour days of never off my feet) you just kind of get used to it. It doesn’t hurt or exhaust me, anymore. And it’s actually kind of peaceful and the time passes surprisingly quickly.

    2. tim gueguen

      Come on, she comes from a town in Indiana, not Riyadh.

      1. Romanticide

        Riyadh may be the wrong place to make a comparison on restricted driving XD https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=39P4ObK9a7k (on the other hand, she is a woman… you are right)

      2. DarkoNeko

        riwhat

        1. Betty Anne

          The capital of Saudi Arabia.

      3. John

        I initially read that as “R’lyeh”.

    3. Cephalo the Pod

      Well she’s 18.

    4. drs

      60% of USA 18 year olds in 2014 have a license. That’s down a lot from 80% in 1983, but it’s still over a majority. And Joyce is from a middle-class car-possessing family in the non-Chicago Midwest, so countervailing factors of poverty or “who’s dumb enough to drive here” or “we didn’t have a car” don’t apply. It would be surprising if she *didn’t* have a license.

      1. Needfuldoer

        A good car is the difference between enjoying and loathing driving. Well-equipped sedan with decent suspension? Great. Touring car on mostly empty back roads? Hell yeah. Economy “crossover SUV” with hard “eco saver” tires and a Tupperware interior, in heavy freeway traffic? Bleh.

        I got my permit as soon as I could when I turned 16, and have been dodging New England drivers ever since. (Providence is worse than Boston.) I just wish there were more European-style touring car circuits around; Loudon is okay but it’s no Silverstone.

        1. Javaboy

          Providence > Boston in terms of worse drivers? Seriously? I drive in Providence at least a couple times a week – no biggie. Driving in Boston is the car equivalent of putting a red-hot poker in my eye. There’s a reason they call them Massholes.

        2. thejeff

          Driving in Boston is fine, at least whenever I visit.
          You drive in, stop at the first available garage, pay whatever outrageous amount they want, and take the T where ever you need to go.

          Much better than NYC, which would be the same except you can’t find a place to park.

        3. drs

          Road surface and car quality are only part of it. My biggest problem with driving is “pay continual attention or die”. I’m too aware that it’s just about the deadliest thing I can do short of doing something deliberately dangerous. (One exception is *biking* on said roads, though I take great lengths to minimize exposure to cars and other risk.) The fact that my butt hurts after a couple hours driving is secondary… also, it’s boring, I’d rather be reading, or watching the scenery without worrying about dying.

          That said, most of Bton to La Porte is probably low density freeway driving where the drawbacks are boredom more than danger, and Becky’s there to ameliorate the boredom. Though leaving Bton on a Friday evening probably isn’t tons of fun. At least they avoid 10th street.

    5. heyman

      I’d be surprised at anyone without a license. As soon as I turned 16 I took the road test. And got my first ticket that afternoon (for not turning left from the center lane).

      1. lejwocky

        I got mine when I was 18 and that was late for my Midwestern friend group. That being said, I was far from the last person to get a license

      2. PrincessPoeDameron

        I’m 25 and without a license. With my disorder, I’m honestly scared to drive.

        1. biggo

          I’ve had mine at 50, two years ago. Because of my disorder, laziness.

        2. heyman

          Laziness is the disorder? That’s a constant struggle for me, too.

        3. JessWitt

          Little older than you but no license all the same. I’m just awful at coordinating driving skills together.

        4. wynne

          My older brother didn’t get his until he was 25, for similar reasons. He actually did get his permit at 16, but it took a while before he felt ready to take the test. I was just excited because he waited long enough for me to be his “supervising” driver for a month.

      3. Rutee

        I got mine when I was 16, but only because SOMEONE had to pick up my younger sister from school, and my dad was determined not to be that person. It was a thing I had to do, so I did it. I take no pleasure from driving, nor is it particularly annoying, ti’s just a thing you have to do in a lot of the states to me. The super strong NEED to drive is a cultural thing I never got.

      4. Airyu

        I didn’t get mine until I was 21, because I started college at 16 and didn’t live near any family who could teach me how to drive.
        My little brother is 17 now and still has no want for driving – my mom is trying to force him to take classes, and he refuses.
        I mean, googling “millennials and driving” shows that about 20% of millennials don’t have a license. 22% of millennials without a license reported they plan to never get one. And only about 25-30% of people get their license when they’re 16. Driving’s just not a “coming of age” thing like it used to be.

      5. wynne

        I got my permit the day I turned 16, but didn’t take the test until I was 18 because life was busy and it wasn’t super super high on my agenda. One of my friends is from Chicago, and even though his family has a car he just never felt the need to drive it, so he doesn’t even have a permit.

      6. Nightsbridge

        I was never eager to drive. And our high school, certain all teenagers were all eager to drive and prone to huge mistakes, crowded us with videos of people dying and being disabled and scare stories about bad driving to ‘scare us straight.’ I am an adult now. I am only now working on actually getting my license.

        1. Captain Button

          My Baby’s The Star Of A Driver’s Ed Movie.

      7. heyman

        I didn’t try to imply anything was wrong with not having a license, just that it wasn’t usual.
        Indiana is similar to where I grew up; I now work in SF which tends toward being anti- automobile (half-decent public transport, few places to keep or park a vehicle, and clueless city council).

    6. Uniqueantique

      I had mine at 17, full adult license, in NY because I’d had drivers ed. in HS. and my daughter had her Jr. operator’s at 16. All of my friend’s were driving before legal, got legal as soon as possible.

  8. Ana Chronistic

    What is WITH you people and no seatbelts?!?!

    It’s like you WANT to create drama

    oh wait

    1. David Herbert

      It always seems weird to me since I grew up in Australia where seatbelts are mandatory. And then I see Americans not wearing them and I’m like “How the hell have you not lost your license yet?”

      1. Someone

        Pretty sure they’re mandatory in the States as well

        1. tim gueguen

          Not everywhere apparently. I saw a libertarian site of some sort a few years ago that claimed New Hampshire was amongst the freest states because they didn’t have seatbelt laws.

        2. DarkVeghetta

          Huh. Completely forgot that the US uses a federal-level law system that permits this sort of things. The more you know.
          That sed, here in Romania they are mandatory but you can often find people not having belts up, but it’s mostly inside city limits, especially in bad/cramped traffic areas.
          And then everyone immediately puts them on if they see any sort of signs of cops watching the road or at known spots. *shrug* It’s much more likely nowadays to see people with them on then not, especially compared to 10-15 years ago when most didn’t bother and the very suggestion was a social faux pas.

        3. Cerberus

          Interestingly enough, where I grew up had very strict seatbelt laws, but the community that most resisted them was also the fundie community, because: the logic went, the government is evil and in the pocket of the Antichrist. The government demands I wear my seatbelt, therefore it is evil. Trusting in God to be one’s copilot is good, showing a lack of trust in God by trusting to human restraints is to show God your disrespect because you no longer believe he’ll keep you safe.

          Which is… unique, certainly. I also only saw it among a small percentage of adults, most of whom were recently from more rural parts of the country. Their kids usually just followed the logic of “I can’t be caught without a seatbelt, because if I get my license taken away or fined, my parents will kill me”.

        4. Dana

          Only state I know of where they’re not is New Hampshire. Live free or die man, live free or die.

        5. Reltzik

          … this would be an inclusive-or, yes?

        6. Screwball

          Don’t wear seat belts, live free then die. Because you were launched out the windscreen & smashed you face on the ground before bleeding to death…

        7. Needfuldoer

          A fitting gravatar!

          New Hampshire and Rhode Island don’t even require motorcyclists to wear helmets.

        8. Screwball

          Didn’t even realize that when i wrote it… XD

        9. Emily

          Or die and endanger everyone else on the road when your corpse goes flying into someone else’s windshield.

        10. MatthewTheLucky

          Well, if something has happened to fling your corpse through your windshield, it’s probably the least of the other drivers’ worries.

        11. Stara

          *Live free AND die

          🙂 Fixed it for ya

        12. Time Sage

          In the state of PA they’re only required in the Front Seats. The back seats (As the drivers handbooks explictly point out) only require it for minors.

      2. John

        They’re mandatory in most states here, too. IME, in reality they’re worn a lot more than in media depictions.

        1. Tacos

          They’re mandatory insomuch that you’ll maybe get in trouble if the cops catch you without one. Some people don’t wear them because YOLO or some other such bullshit reason.

        2. Betty Anne

          You might be surprised. Wisconsin is notorious for terrible roads, summer and winter, and Mud Ducks and FIBs are regularly driving here as though it’s the Indy 500. Despite that, people of all ages, from infants not even in car seats all the way through elderly are regularly severely injured or killed in this state due to not wearing seat belts.

          Just one example: http://www.channel3000.com/news/Infant-toddler-ejected-from-car-in-rollover-accident/35526724 (In that incident, we also find an OWI (verified by police), probably reckless/inattentive driving (hit the gravel for no reason at a speed high enough to cause loss of control), and a passenger without health insurance (denied medical treatment despite being injured; also possibly high, because that can deter people from hospitals that will blood test and discover the drugs).

          And as far as “get in trouble if the cops catch you without one” (Wisconsin seat belt law):

          Child <1 (or <20 lbs) in rear-facing infant seat; 1 – 3 (and 20 – 40 lbs) in forward-facing child safety seat; 4 – 7 (and 40 – 80 lbs and <57") in booster seat; <3 in rear seat if available. Children 80 lbs and >57″) are allowed in an adult seat belt. Fine for first offense: $173.50 if passenger 8 years old, Fine for first offense: $10

          People who resist seat belt laws are sometimes the YOLO sort, but more often they’re simply lazy and/or feel that “the man” shouldn’t be dictating what they do in their personal vehicle. You’ll also find these same people smoking in their car with children present, using their cell phone (both as phone and texting; some go so far as to watch videos, browse the Internet, use their phone-based GPS or post on Facebook while driving), eating, being distracted by passengers, or otherwise being dangerous behind the wheel.

        3. fogel

          I once gave a guy from work a ride. He disliked that I belted. He said that it showed that I lacked confidence in my driving and made him nervous.

        4. Leorale

          That’s pretty bonkers. You can be confident in your own driving but not confident in other drivers, for example.

      3. Uniqueantique

        “Click it or ticket” re: wear your seatbelt or get a ticket if caught. The law is mandatory here in the States, except NH I heard.
        Same with helmets on Motorbikes. Most states require them. Some don’t.

        1. PrincessPoeDameron

          PA doesn’t, which is the dumbest thing imo.

        2. mystseekyr

          We call them ‘donorcycles’ here in Ohio.

        3. qman

          Mandatory helmet use is more than a little bit silly, considering if you crash you’re very likely to be killed with or without it. Unlike seatbelts, they don’t really improve your odds all that much, and people should have the right to decide for themselves. I wear one because I’m an inexperienced rider, but if I had many years of practice under my belt I might choose not to.

          Adults should also be allowed to choose whether or not to wear a seatbelt. Adults have the ability to make their own decisions. If an adult chooses not to wear a seatbelt, crashes, and dies, that’s on them, and we start weeding out the gene pool. Ticketing people for not wearing seatbelts is nothing but a revenue generator. I wear mine because I’m not a moron, but that doesn’t mean it should be mandated. There are situations where not wearing a seatbelt is reasonable, too, such as a delivery driver or tow truck operator while in a low-speed situation, where they have to get in and out of the vehicle repeatedly.

        4. Needfuldoer

          If you get into an accident and you’re not buckled in, you become an untethered projectile and present unnecessary and easily preventable danger to everyone else in the car.

          Someone I know broke her arm and suffered internal injuries because her unbelted friend flew across the back seat and slammed her into the car door.

        5. MichaelLanting

          In Pennsylvania, after the repeal of the helmet law, the head injury-related death rate per 10,000 motorcycle registrations increased by 36.9%. Doesn’t sound to me like wearing a helmet is pointless. But hey, if you like the wind in your hair that much, go right ahead.

      4. vlanoik

        I could only find first offense info, but at least in my state not wearing a seatbelt is only a 15 buck fine, no points on the license, maybe you’ll get a point with enough offenses but I doubt it, and without getting those points you won’t lose your license

    2. tim gueguen

      Looking at your icon makes me wonder if Ruth drives. And if she’s ever driven while sloshed.

      1. Spencer

        Well, she did get into an accident involving a drunk driver that killed her parents.

      2. Dana

        If she did I’m sure she did it with integrity and has no regrets.

        1. Jon Rich

          ^ This

        2. Spencer

          Part of me says that we need to come up with a new Ruth joke, but Roomies!Ruth’s entire reason to be was to get hit by a truck.

        3. Screwball

          Guess she had a trucked-up life in that comic them…

          …Come on, anyone?

    3. Roborat

      Yea, when I saw the last two panels, my first thought was: “where are the seatbelts?”

  9. Zagreus

    And then…THE TRUCK APPEARS.

    (kidding of course but c’mon wouldn’t it be JUST LIKE WILLIS to pull that right now you know it’s true)

    1. butts

      And suddenly Ruth comes out of nowhere

    2. showler

      I’d love to see THE TRUCK appear and they get into a tiny fender bender while backing out of the parking spot.

    3. Amazi-Stool

      Truck?
      He already pulled it! The truck was there in naked daylight!

  10. Malcreos

    I guess this makes me an old person. Devastating.

  11. Spencer

    She piloted a giant robot that one time. Does that count?

    1. Reltzik

      Not so much that one time as that one alternate time.

    2. Jhon

      Links, or it Didn’t Happen.

  12. Brigid Keely

    Oh no! Someone’s driving a car in a Willis strip! SOMETHING TERRIBLE IS GOING TO HAPPEN.

    1. JustCheetoDust

      Joyce forgets to stop for gas.

      1. lejwocky

        They should have bought a squirrel.

        1. Steven

          Squirrel???

    2. tim gueguen

      They’ll find Faz is hding under the back seat.

      1. Someone

        They find Ryan hiding under the back seat.

        1. fogel

          ????

        2. Andrusi

          They find Ryan hiding under Faz.

        3. Cerberus

          Aww, they found love.

        4. tim gueguen

          More like Faz finding a mentor. Yeech!

        5. Someone

          I do wonder what Shortpacked! Faz’s reaction would be to meeting Ryan.
          It really depends on how far Faz is willing to go, we never really see Faz get overtly rapey though. Mostly because that would make Faz go from a fun goofy creepy guy we can laugh about to full on monster.

        6. ChrisHerself

          Faz is a junior PUA…. and from the gist I pick up around here, that’s no different than a monster.

        7. thejeff

          Except that Faz is so horribly bad at it, he’s no threat. Creepy as hell, but no threat.

        8. ChrisHerself

          Give him a few years of practice and people brushing his behavior off as harmless and you get….

    3. Tacos

      They get a flat and they don’t have a spare.

      1. JustCheetoDust

        Or the spare is actually the previous flat tire.

        1. Durandal_1707

          They ask a passer-by for directions, only to find he has no face or something.

        2. Reltzik

          FAAAAAAAACE.

          …. what, is that dated? It’s dated, isn’t it? Dammit, I thought that was immortal.

        3. Dellaran

          The classics never go out of style.

          Also, femurs. And your mom. For a nickel.

        4. thejeff

          Stop the Faces!

    4. Bagge

      Becky farts

      1. Someone

        Joyce farts

        We are so mature

        1. ChrisHerself

          Dad farts

          He is quite mature

  13. Stephen R. Bierce

    *plays Tracy Chapman’s “Fast Car” on the car stereo*

    1. Bicycle Bill

      Was thinking more along the lines of the Beatles and “Baby You Can Drive My Car”.

      1. biggo

        Al Yankovic: “She Drives Like Crazy” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VcM9Uou77j4

        1. Screwball

          XD
          She’s a demon
          Behind the wheel
          Thinks she’s drivin’
          The Batmobile

      2. Disloyal Subject

        I was feeling Wheels of Steel, by Saxon.

      3. ChrisHerself

        She’ll have fun, fun fun, till her daddy takes the Tahoe away

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JK7DA0FliIs

    2. Professor Fate

      Or Golden Earring’s ‘Radar Love’.

      ” … Last car to pass, here I go … “

    3. fogel

      You can probably hack the entertainment system on some cars these days?

      1. Amazi-Stool

        Uh, yes very much so!
        The modern car’s operating system is such a mess that researchers were once able to get complete control of a vehicle by playing a song laced with malicious code.

  14. Mr. Mendo

    Seriously, Joyce’s day is going so well I’m afraid it’s gonna turn out to be a dream!

    1. Spencer

      Oh no, we’re about to get St. Elsewhere’d.

      1. Needfuldoer

        Or we go the Newhardt route:

        On her way into her parents’ house, Joyce gets hit in the head by a golf ball, and collapses to the floor.

        Cut to a dark bedroom. Joyce jolts awake and turns on the lamp on her nightstand.
        “Honey… Honey wake up! You won’t believe the dream I just had!”
        Walky turns on the lamp on his side and rolls over.
        “Alright, Joyce. Let’s hear it.”
        “We were all back at college.”
        “I’m happy for you. Goodnight.”
        “But nothing made sense! You were dating Dorothy, Ruth was my RA, Becky had this… haircut and was dating Dina, Head Alien had us entranced with a cartoon on TV, none of us had powers, and Amber ran around in a superhero costume for some reason.”
        “That settles it. No more Japanese food before bed.”

        https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ZgdUWXf8jJk

        1. Captain Button

          You’re here back in good old 1955.

  15. David Herbert

    I read the alt text and was like “I’m sure I saw her drive in Joyce & Walky” but now I’m not so sure…

  16. Mada

    Just remember; check your mirrors to make sure nobody in a jumpsuit and cape is hitching a ride behind you on a skateboard.

    1. Someone

      Dammit Amazi-Girl, no one is being kidnapped this time!

      1. Zababcd

        But there’s a dad!

        1. Amazi-Stool

          Whow, perfect Gravatar match!

    2. Reltzik

      Or blue jeans, flannel and an orange life-preserver-esque jacket.

      …. WHAT? This WAS drawn in 2015, after all.

  17. CaptainBatson

    Unless you count giant robots and jetpacks, then I think so.

  18. Jay Eff

    “Who’s driving? Oh my God Joyce is driving! How can that be??”

    1. Leorale

      Jesus, take the wheel!

      1. tim gueguen

        Jesus is her co-pilot. He’s sitting on Becky’s lap.

        1. Captain Button

          I assume a plastic Jesus watching you from the dashboard is more a Catholic thing, so we won’t get that here.

      2. fogel

        Historical Jesus, right?

    2. SundaesChild

      Hopefully, Willis won’t have to outsource to Korean animators to make budget. (Man, I want to watch Clerks: TAS now.)

  19. Caelum

    is it weird i’m surprised joyce can drive

  20. JessWitt

    And I thought the closest we’d get to Joyce driving is wearing Sal’s helmet, making motorbike noises.

    1. Amazi-Stool

      Joyce rides motorcycles without wearing a helmet!

  21. Just Me

    Joyce has a cell phone and a Driver’s License….she hasn’t been sheltered from the world nearly enough (Thank goodness).

    Congrats Willis on a First. Just hope she hasn’t been taking additional driving lessons from Sal.

  22. Dariu55

    Something tells me that Joyce peeling out of the parking lot will be slow and unimpressive.

    1. random832

      That car doesn’t even look like it can “peel”.

      1. JustCheetoDust

        Maybe the car’s redeeming qualities are in its parking capabilities.

        1. Dariu55

          OH DEAR LORD WHAT DID I SEE

        2. Disloyal Subject

          MAJESTY.

        3. random832

          I expected the video to end with a caption “like a glove”.

      2. Reltzik

        Sure it can! Just park it near the ocean with salty air for a year.

        1. Dariu55

          That’s not peeling, that’s falling apart IN STYLE.

      3. Bicycle Bill

        Neutral dump.  Put the car in ‘N’, rev it up, and then drop the gearshift into ‘D’.  Not perfect, but the first time you do that with Mom or Dad in the car it’s gonna shake ’em up a bit.

      4. Needfuldoer

        It looks like a late 90s to 2005 Chevy Blazer (or one of its many badge-engineered clones). 190 horsepower, 250 pound-feet of torque, weighs about 3,800 pounds. As long as it’s in 2WD and there isn’t much in the back, she should be able to light up one of the rear tires with a little effort.

        1. ChrisHerself

          As the fond owner of a 1999 Chevy Blazer I can vouch for all of this

  23. gkheyf

    gah! they grow up so fast. just 18 years and suddenly they’re driving.

    …wait, you’re saying that many of the characters are actually 18 real-world years old?? trippy

    1. John

      Roomies! began in the fall of ’97, and Joyce made her first Roomies! appearance not long thereafter. A number of the characters, including Joyce, antedate Roomies!.

      1. heyman

        How do you antedate Roomies? Seriously, I found Willis much later than many here and haven’t nearly caught up.

        1. David M Willis

          I drew comics in my notebooks before I drew webcomics.

        2. heyman

          Oh! Okay.
          I drew comics in my notebooks, but progressing to webcomics needed the Web. And more talent than I had.

        3. de Combys

          Talent is merely obstinate repetition until desired level is achieved.

        4. vmgx

          file:///C:/Users/vmgx/Desktop/desired%20level.jpg

        5. vmgx

          oh shit, I don’t think I knew how this worked, How do I remove the coment?

        6. Disloyal Subject

          You don’t remove comments from WordPress. Unless Willis sees fit to redact it, your shame will be eternal.
          It happens.

        7. Deanatay

          You don’t. Your mistake is now a part of the Internet, forever.

        8. vmgx

          http://vitormgullo.deviantart.com/art/desired-Level-587814338?ga_submit_new=10%253A1454233160

        9. ChrisHerself

          This beautiful icon/comment combo

        10. gkheyf

          dina in her tricera-top is merely super awesomeness until h~ngh is achieved!

  24. Cheshrin

    Hey, remember when Willis posted the first panel on tumblr as a buffer preview and it was in when shit was just starting to go down in the Becky arc and we saw Hank and Joyce’s face and we thought it was gonna be horrible?

    And now that it’s here it turns out to be actually frickin’ adorable?

    There’s so much family dysfunction going on in this comic that I sometimes forget that Joyce actually has a decent relationship with her parents.

    1. Nyzer

      With her father, more like. Her mother…

      Well, they might have had a relationship that LOOKED okay, that even Joyce BELIEVED was okay, but given how badly Carol reacted to so much of the non-fundie stuff going on in Joyce’s life, it seems that there are some pretty major dysfunctions going on when Joyce glances off the path Carol’s hoping to railroad her down.

      Remember that one of Carol’s fourth thought about “toedad pulled a gun on me” was “oh, but I’d’ve done it too!” I mean holy shit.

      1. leadsynth

        Her most perfectest mom…

        1. Cerberus

          Yeppers.

      2. de Combys

        My worries exactly.

      3. Cheshrin

        Fair enough. Hank is shaping up to be pretty chill as far as dads are concerned (so far, at least; still watching that other shoe like a hawk because it will drop, just you wait), Carol is kind of fucked up and needs to re-evaluate how she defines “parental devotion.”

        For now, though, let’s just enjoy the calm before the inevitable shit-storm while we can.

    2. Captain Button

      I’ve had times when I’ve looked around my social group and thought “Wait, why am I the only one here who doesn’t have any significant problem with my parents?”

      1. Disloyal Subject

        Are you me? Because I’ve had that thought all too often.

        1. Captain Button

          Could be, I’ve never seen us photographed together.

          And it would explain the blackouts.

          Is this weird glowing rock something important, by the way?

        2. Disloyal Subject

          It’s probably nothi-

  25. Jabberwocky

    Does “piloting a robot shaped like herself” count as “driving?”

    1. Reltzik

      In that case, no. That was flying.

      …. and since it ended up with that robot going kablooey….

  26. DSL

    First time he’s drawn …? Joyce, you scamp, you’ve been driving behind Willis’s back.

  27. drs

    Now I really like Hank. Driving is evil.

    Also, where the heck do they live that’s four hours away? Even Gary is three hours away. *Chicago* is 3.5 hours if traffic’s not bad. (Going by Google Maps, anyway.)

    1. heyman

      I drove slower and more safely with a parent in the vehicle. Especially while still living at home!

      1. drs

        Google’s already assuming an average trip speed of 53 to 63 mph (dividing the stated distance by time estimate) on these routes.

    2. drs

      Granted, I’m checking around midnight; if they’re leaving Friday afternoon or evening, and going to e.g. South Bend, four hours is more plausible.

      1. random832

        La Porte.

    3. Quinctia

      La Porte isn’t a straight shot from a major interstate, so that slows things down. Once they get off I65, it’s going to be a crapshoot.

      Google has it at 3.35 hours, but I don’t know how much of that is stop and go.

      1. Cerberus

        Especially since they’ll be hitting rush hour on the way, given that the trip is that long and it’s around 2-3ish.

  28. Trolldrool

    So given Hank’s expectations that he’ll be able to relax for four hours, there’s no way this isn’t going to turn into another car chase, right? I know I’m not the first person in the last 3 days to suggest that, but Hank’s assumption gives it a lot of plausibility.

    1. BenRG

      I can already see a disbelieving Dorothy and a grimly approving Sal watching the life News Copter footage of a convoy of about twenty Indiana State Highway Patrol cars following a fast-moving and erratically swerving Brown family car down the freeway. Inside, unaware of the fuss, Joyce and Becky are arguing over which mile-marker Joyce needs to turn off onto the local roads.

  29. heyman

    I’m old, and driving is still AWESOME!

    1. Uncertainty Moth

      I had a friend who absolutely loved driving, until we did a trip to Nashville (14 hours each way on consecutive days)

      1. de Combys

        Oh, why wouldn’t you take a break after arriving?

    2. Reltzik

      Driving would be awesome if it weren’t for the other people on the road.

      One half traffic, one half crazy people.

      CURSE YOU PORTLAND.

      1. Reltzik

        And for the record, cops with radar guns count as other people on the road.

  30. caesaria82

    Always good to have some people around who are enthusiastic about driving because I absolutely hate driving, was very bad at it, constantly terrified, so I never do it anymore. Thankfully I’ve always lived in urban areas and never really needed to own a car, but thanks to all the people who’ve ever driven me somewhere – you’re appreciated 😉

    1. OldFart

      Driving is much more risky than people think and most do it without due caution IMO. I drive for a living but take the bus most of the time I’m not working.

  31. Dana

    I have a bad feeling Hank is expecting Carol to flip her shit and he knows he’ll need to be rested for it.

  32. -Sentinel-

    Becky has the best facial expressions.

  33. John

    Why drive when you can jetpack?

    1. Reltzik

      Fewer bugs in the mouth.

  34. miados

    I remember when i was still on my learners permit the adult fell asleep on me more than once as i drove.

    1. de Combys

      That must be a good sign. As in : your driving isn’t nerve-wracking.

      1. Screwball

        Naaa, they weren’t falling asleep, they were just passing out from all the stress & fear… 😛

        Sorry, had to say it… :p

  35. random832

    Completely unexpected. Since no-one in the comic has cars I had completely forgotten that college-age people can drive.

    1. random832

      Yes, even though Sal has a motorcycle. It wouldn’t even have occurred to me that she can drive a car.

      1. tim gueguen

        She may not be able to drive a car.

      2. Palamdrone

        Yeah, I don’t believe for a second that Sal ever bothered to get a driver’s license.

        1. OldFart

          AFAIK all states require a drivers license, plus a motorcycle endorsement with a separate test. Many states waive the test if riders pass a Motorcycle Safety Foundation Novice course. Some people ride without proper training and licensing. FOOLS!

        2. Reltzik

          I do. She was probably closely monitored due to her record. Keep your nose clean or go to juvie. It’s enough at least to sit through some classes and take some tests, if not necessarily enough to compromise on what you really care about.

  36. oysteinthenoisy

    We’re all amazed because Joyce talked about not being allowed to drive her bike for more than two blocks away until after she turned sixteen, IIRC. So where in the middle of that overprotective mess did Joyce get driving lessons.

    1. Trolldrool

      It was probably on the condition that she never drive anywhere without an adult family member in the car with her.

    2. Palamdrone

      Until she turn sixteen. Then Mr. and Mrs. Brown took the training wheels off and said good luck.

    3. Reltzik

      Nonono. You don’t understand. Cars are inherently safer from kidnappers, robbers, rapists and the like compared to bicycles. You’re INDOORS. The protection of two thin layers of plastic siding and glass windows is safety far in excess of the handicaps of being literally strapped to a chair, trapped in a cage, and unable to just bolt in any direction.

      1. John

        Being strapped to a chair is much less of a handicap when you can, at the touch of a pedal, cause said chair, cage and all, to accelerate rapidly to highway speeds.

        Cars also make very effective melee weapons in a pinch.

        1. Reltzik

          If you’re stopped with a car in front of you and another behind you, you can’t with a touch of a pedal cause said etc. And cars make lousy melee weapons unless someone is standing right in front or behind of you. If they’re at one of the doors, holding it so you can’t swing it open into them, they’re pretty much useless in that regard.

  37. Wublub

    Joyce knows how to drive?
    I mean, I guess it makes sense. She is an adult. But she’s just so… so naive and sheltered. I guess I just assumed she was… I don’t know, planning on taking the bus/having her future husband drive her all the time.

    1. tim gueguen

      Chances are Joyce planned on having a bunch of kids, so she’d probably need to be able to drive to do things like go grocery shopping.

      1. Cerberus

        Yeah, you wouldn’t expect the man of the household to debase and emasculate himself doing chores, right? Especially not just being some woman’s chauffeur. So therefore, have the little lady drive an easier car so it doesn’t tax her too much so she can handle all of that on her own. /sadly this is actually the 1950s suburban logic that family’s like Joyce aspire towards in their gender roles.

  38. vonniesaur

    I have never been that excited about getting to drive…except for the fact that I like being able to get places by myself, if someone else is going and they’re driving I prefer it that way

    1. JustCheetoDust

      if someone else is going and they’re driving I prefer it that way

      I would do that more often if I didn’t want the freedom to leave at any time.

      1. heyman

        Freedom is Reason No. 1 to have a vehicle.

  39. Briny

    I’m past ‘oh this is gonna be a social carcrash’ worries, and moving onto ‘this is gonna be an actual carcrash’ worries.

    1. Briny

      (Not out of any aspersions on the characters’ driving abilities, but because Doom’s gotta happen sooner or later…)

      1. Lord Stoneheart

        If it makes you feel better we’ve already had a car crash. It’s not likely to pop up again the next chapter.

        1. Captain Button

          If only because Willis doesn’t want to get bugged about it in the bonus strip voting.

      2. Kamino Neko

        Doom happens after they reach La Porte.

    2. 3-I

      The grim spectre of that hospital scene is still hanging over me. c.c

  40. Palamdrone

    Catastrophic car accident in 3… 2… 1…

    1. Reltzik

      I vote for a flat tire stranding them out in the middle of Nowhere, Indiana after dark with no cell phone recep…

      … wait, the entire state is flat and mild hills, isn’t it? What’s blocking the cell phones? Dammit, horror movies haven’t been the same ever since every victim has a cell phone.

      1. Palamdrone

        Aliens. Aliens block cell reception.

        1. Disloyal Subject

          I was wondering how and why there keep being “eyewitness reports” of XCOM fireteams capturing downed spacecraft out in the middle of nowhere.

      2. drs

        Bloomington is actually mildly hilly (“the glaciers never made it this far”, said a misleading department website), more so toward the south (Appalachia) and fading to the north, going flat somewhere south of Indianapolis.

  41. Plasma Mongoose

    Driving’s only fun when you don’t have to worry about little things like speed limits, road rules or pedestrians, besides when someone else is driving, you can play with your phone.

    1. inqntrol

      Or enjoy the sights…wait people don’t do that anymore,do they?
      Damn, I’m old.

      1. APersonAmI

        I used to enjoy the sights, as a kid. Then, when I became adult, I didn’t enjoy it as much. Never realized why. Then it turned out I needed glasses, and then I could see stuff again, and now I love enjoying the sights again.

        Never to young to have fun starin’ at stuff!

  42. Wublub

    I guess Hank was really serious about trusting Joyce and her being an adult now and all that stuff. I wonder if he’s rethinking how much he and Carol sheltered her as a child. Maybe the whole Toedad thing made him realize that she needs to be able to take care of herself, and can’t just expect her future perfect wonderful husband to protect her.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      That and he rather get some shuteye for a few hours.

  43. Bernadotte

    well Joyce’s dad looks like a really cool guy

    1. Spencer

      lets his daughter drive home and doesnt afraid of anything

  44. ozaline

    I have kids so that I can spend 4 hours driving to pick them up, so that I can nap for four hours after that.

    Your logic… I see it!

  45. Saaaam

    4 hours is a rough drive. 3 is the limit of a drive being okay

    1. ozaline

      Is that like a science thing, that you should rest every three hours? Or just personal opinion? *I mean it’d make sense, same reason why work breaks are usually spaced out about 2 1/2 hours apart*

      the drive from Edmonton to Calgary is a bit over three hours but in the middle are THE BEST DONUTS!

      1. fogel

        I thought that in Canada “donuts” are called “Tim Hortons” for some reason.

        1. DSL

          No, no, “Tim Hortons” are what Canada sends to the US in revenge for getting McDonald’s.

        2. Roborat

          I thought that was Celine Dion?

        3. random832

          No, but donut holes are called tim bits.

        4. Marie

          Tim Hortons is where you buy them (sort of like Dunkin Donuts, but maybe more coffee), although we do call donut holes timbits (although, I don’t know how often people say that when buying them elsewhere, since I hardly know anyone who gets them elsewhere).

    2. random832

      I wonder if Becky can drive…

      1. fogel

        Only when the original driver climbs out the window onto the roof.

        1. Bagge

          TOO SOON

          No, actually, that was pretty hilarious 🙂

        2. Cerberus

          Heh.

  46. Rabid Rabbit

    No, no, Hank. You had kids because the Good Lord commanded you to go forth and multiply. Stop blaspheming.

    This honestly strikes me as one of the biggest differences between Hank and Carol we’ve seen yet. Based on her reaction to cartoons (and some of Willis’ anecdotes about his own mother), I can’t imagine her thinking this funny.

    1. Reltzik

      That’s not blasphemy, that’s Hank finally understanding one of the many, many elements of God’s wisdom in giving that command.

      …. well, probably not “finally” understanding it, in that he likely figured it out 3 kids ago.

  47. A Scientist

    Oh man, look at that focus. Joyce is ready.

    This is her moment.

    Everything has led to this day.

    Four hours, limited supervision, driving.

    (When my dad asks me to drive, on the other hand, I groan, because I like to be the one sleeping in the back seat.)

    1. Tacos

      Cut to 2 hours later, Joyce is going 35mph while her and Becky are doing a sing-a-long to some corny music and Hank is in the backseat with his fingers in his ears as he regrets letting Joyce drive >.>

      1. butting

        Worse yet, Becky and Hank are doing a sing-a-long to corny music, while Joyce is hollering “If you don’t cut that out we’re turning around, SO HELP ME!”

        1. Bagge

          HEADCANON

          And the song they are singing is Let it go.

        2. DinaWho

          While a nice play on the chapter title, unlikely since I think the Browns prohibited Frozen.

    2. Roborat

      Nah, not a Focus, looks more like an Explorer, or some other generic SUV.

  48. Gordon

    I feel like this is going to be a nice, if sometimes tense and slightly awkward, trip home for Joyce and Becky.

    And they’re going to come back to Knight Templar turned Tyrant Mary, reigning over the hall.

    Or, Mary is going to get shut down because most of her proof about Ruth comes down to Becky living in the dorm(her relationship with Billie can’t be proven, and neither can any physical altercations with students if they weren’t reported, particularly if the floor rallies against Mary, which seems likely), who is going to be away for roughly three whole days.

    1. Captain Button

      This all part of Evil Hank’s master plan. He pretends to sleep while actually listening to Joyce and Becky go over their plans to corrupt the rest of the Brown family and open the La Porte Hellgate.

    2. Spencer

      Would the dorm protect Ruth? I don’t think we’ve been given any indication that they like her, and they’re all sheltering Becky from her.

      1. thejeff

        No, but they’d deny that Becky’s living there, which has a similar effect. And no one else knows about Ruth & Billie, so they’d likely wind up backing her up there – “Ruth and Billie? That’s ridiculous, they’re fighting all the time.”

        1. Spencer

          Right, they’d definitely all try to protect Becky, but right now they’re all protecting her from Ruth. If someone’s objections were “Ruth is kind of shit at her job” then I don’t think anyone there would be willing to step up, except for Billie, which then begs the question of “why are you defending Ruth when she flung you into a chair” and would probably be the clearest indicator that there was something going on between the two.

          And like, Ruth banging one of her students doesn’t seem like it’d be that hard to prove, though I guess it’s a moot point since Mary’s only interested in it for blackmail. She probably won’t actually go to Ruth’s bosses to tattle on her.

        2. thejeff

          Oh sure, they wouldn’t actually care to defend Ruth over her actual job problems, but that isn’t the threat. Mary’s targeting the “perverted vagrant” and “defiling the cheerleader”. The first they’ll defend/hide, the second they’ll laugh at.
          In the abstract they wouldn’t defend Ruth, but against the likely attack, they will.

        3. Cerberus

          This. Especially since a lot of that floor is some flavor of queer or has close friends who are queer, so a specifically homophobic attack on Ruth would only make everyone want to rally behind her rather than kick her to the curb for her abusive running of things.

        4. Spencer

          I guess the pressing point for me is whether a sufficiently awful reason someone has to antagonize Ruth like Mary’s would be enough to stand up for her, or would it be more like “okay that’s a fucked up reason to hate somebody but Ruth is pretty terrible.”

      2. Fwip

        The only real way to condemn Ruth is to reveal they’ve been allowing a non-student to live in the residence, and to throw Billie under the bus as well. They’d also all be complicit in it, for failing to report either of these things.

        In short, even the most selfish jerk would have every reason to keep their mouth shut because they’d hang themselves with their own rope otherwise.

        The thing is, though, that Mary doesn’t have any reason to follow through on her threat. The only reason she would is if Ruth tried to hurt her in some way. Really, that’s the quintessential point: Mary isn’t waiting around, looking for a chance to get Becky kicked out or have Billie exposed or she’d have done it by now. Isn’t like she hasn’t had more than ample opportunity. She’s kind of just been minding her own business this entire time, trying to focus on her studies.

        The only question that follows is whether Mary will use the knowledge that she’s invulnerable to hurt people for no reason other than to hurt them, rather than to ensure her retaliations aren’t called out. If her behaviour thus far is anything to go by… I don’t imagine so. After all, she’s had this knowledge for a while now; could’ve used it any time before this point.

    3. Cerberus

      “Lackeys, bring me the head of the loud red one… no, the queer one… no, the other other queer one. Holy fuck, we have that many “sinner” redheads?”

      1. Spencer

        Mandy dyed her hair because she felt pushed out of her niche.

    4. Fwip

      The critical flaw in this plan is that all Mary would have to do is wait three days, at which point, she can promptly do it again. There’s ways around this, naturally, but… Y’know.

      1. Spencer

        Which I guess puts the kibosh on Becky staying with the Browns, though I guess that wasn’t going to happen in the first place, and hence something almost certainly going terribly, catastrophically wrong while she’s there.

        I wonder if we’ll see a time skip to Becky enrolling in the January term, or maybe since Marcie is living on her own and apparently works a lot, Becky would move in with her.

  49. Bluesnake462

    Driving was never a big deal for me.

  50. Mandy

    I had forgotten, but freshman year it WAS pretty fun to get the chance to drive, since we weren’t allowed to have cars. Nearly a year without driving felt really weird. Sophomore year I brought my car up to Purdue and it was so much nicer.

  51. Gordon

    I don’t understand why everyone is so amazed by Joyce being able to drive. I mean, let’s say that Joyce’s parents do expect her to get a college education and then become a homemaker and have children.

    She’s going to have to drive those children places. She will have to drive to get groceries. And to the bank. Diving will still be a necessary skill for her to have.

    They presumably live in a rural area. Driving is a necessity. Carol may not like to drive. Joyce’s brother(s) and sister would have grown up and been unable to take her places. Having the extra driver is convenient on long trips. There’s a million good reasons for her to have learned how to drive. And there are few reasons that work as good counterarguments.

    1. Tacos

      I guess I always assumed that they didn’t let Joyce learn how to drive because of some patriarchal or fundie reason that it was the man’s job to drive the women around.

      1. Reltzik

        Yeah, but it’s the woman’s job to go shopping.

    2. trlkly

      Well, for me, it just was because they clearly weren’t driving around on campus. Everyone at my college drove. I had to walk, and getting places on time was often a bit of a time crunch–not this sauntering around they apparently do in this comic.

      1. drs

        Willis has said they live in Read Hall, which is pretty much right on campus; there’s really no way to drive to class even if they had cars. The main library has a parking lot but probably still wouldn’t be worth the hassle, it’s like a 7-10 minute walk.

        Even those undergrads who live in further out dorms I think mostly take the campus shuttle buses; it’s not a parking-rich campus, and the 33,000 undergrads aren’t high on the priority list for what there is.

  52. RegalGamer

    Willis says first time in 18 years? Does this mean she’s actually an adult now?

  53. Ash Ketchup

    My dad would pull this on me all the time. Just when I thought I was gonna get to take a nap in the passenger seat…

  54. avstron

    As long as Mr. Brown doesn’t have a bad surprise home like handing Becky over to her abusive father I’m appreciating him more.

    1. Riku

      I’m 99% sure Toedad is in jail now if he’s not still in the hospital

    2. de Combys

      I really don’t see why the prison guards would let her into his cell.

  55. masterofthez

    Ya, the fight between who drives home is a long battle between me and my dad. He would win most of the time, and I’d be forced to drive us home. That’s why I never really understood the love people my age have with driving.

    1. Disloyal Subject

      I think it’s a power trip. Think about it; the driver controls a slab of machinery and plastic weighing thousands of pounds and gets to easily move faster than Olympic sprinters.

  56. NaYa

    Now wait til she gets cut off and starts swearing like a pirate…

    1. Bagge

      Hank, who will prove to be cool and understanding about everything else, will NOT tolerate swearing.

      1. Reltzik

        Worse, it will make him question the basis on which he is being cool and understanding about everything else.

  57. newllend(henryvolt)

    At least this time we don’t haft to worry about the driver letting go of the wheel to shoot someone.

  58. Lordess of Madness

    Put on the good tunes and turn it up! Sing it loud! Swear your heart out at that dumbass driver! Dad’s not getting a nap!

    1. Screwball

      Driver chooses the tunes, shotgun shuts the fuck up….

      1. Disloyal Subject

        Driver chooses, shotgun executes.

        1. Screwball

          Combined with that gravatar, that comment sounds a bit sinister…

        2. Disloyal Subject

          It is an efficient setup. The Cult Mechanicus would approve.

        3. Screwball

          Hmmm, that one… *chugchug….BOOM!*

        4. Lordess of Madness

          In this case, with Joyce and Becky in the front, I’d say so! Mr. Brown can’t even reach the radio!

  59. Papaya Punk Pixie

    Anyone wondering if something with Jocelyne is going to come up at the Brown house?

    1. SDGlyph

      I’m expecting it.

    2. Leorale

      I think everyone is looking forward to it, with varying mixtures of joy, dread, and popcorn.

      1. Reltzik

        I think that particular flavor is called “Jalepeno Kettle Corn”.

      2. Screwball

        I got the popcorn covered… :p

        1. Disloyal Subject

          I did too, but I ate all mine. Rice and beef will have to do as a substitute.

    3. Spencer

      Jocelyne is showing up next storyline with her brother, though from the preview panels it seems they’re at a restaurant instead of their home.

      1. Cerberus

        Though there’s also preview panels of her in the car with Hank, so she might be spending at least a day this weekend home with Joyce.

        1. Spencer

          Just quickly went over the upcoming previews featuring Jocelyne, and the only one with her in a car is with her older brother, Johnathan.

          Though of course I doubt we’d only see Jocelyne again so she can stop at a McDonalds, so I’m gonna go ahead and say some family drama occurs that motivates the Brown kids to take off for a bit.

        2. Kamino Neko

          John.

          John.

          Not Jonathan and certainly not Johnathan, which is an abomination against etymology.

          God is Gracious, but He has not Given.

        3. Spencer

          Oh huh. It is actually spelled Jonathan when Jocelyne mentioned it.

        4. Kamino Neko

          Huh. So it was. Where’d I get the idea he was John?

          Well, that’s embarrassing.

          (‘Johnathan’ is still an abomination.)

  60. gonegirl

    I’ve got a really, really bad feeling about this

    fatal car accident? she swears horribly in traffic? runs over an orphan?

    1. Reltzik

      Willis promised no fatal car accidents.

      To the best of my knowledge, he was mum on the subject of maiming car accidents.

      1. 3-I

        It continues to worry me to no small degree that both of you have the same Mary avatar. I’m imagining two Marys squaring off and preparing to fight. c.c

    2. Tacos

      Naw, they’ll get abducted by aliens and have wacky space adventures as they try to save the Universe.

      But in all seriousness, I expect the car ride to be uneventful. It’s when they get home and meet Carol that I think stuff will happen.

    3. BenRG

      This is a guess but I’m putting my money on slapstick as a kind of antidote to all the grimdark we’ve had recently and will doubtless shortly follow. So, I think that we’re going to get a small insight into what middle and high school-age Joyce and Becky were like together and what that brought into others’ lives.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        What we’ve had so far is a very real and human level of horribleness. Grimdark is something else entirely.

    4. Kamino Neko

      Why is everyone thinking ‘there’s going to be drama’…and then suggesting things that keep them from getting to where the drama-bomb is waiting?

      1. Disloyal Subject

        Wishful thinking?

        1. Cerberus

          Oh hey, maybe it’ll be this easy drama bomb rather than the drawn out noose of awfulness waiting at home… maybe… car crash, yeah?

        2. Commodore Jeep-Eep

          No reason for the two to be mutually exclusive.

  61. Professor Fate

    I had a learners permit at 15, a licence at 16, bought my own car at 17, went in the service at 18 and took it to my duty station.

    As a group, Millennials are less inclined to drive or own a car. Many are city dwellers and use taxis, Uber and public transit.

    1. Sam

      Yup. I am one of those Millennials. I may have to move somewhere else and buy a car soon though and I AM DREADING IT.

  62. Notmetoday

    Maybe this time some seat belts? Don’t need to be kidnapped and have a superhero hanging off the back of the car to be safe!

  63. boomboom

    Now all we need is a lil Mike to show up so he and Joyce can live happily ever after.

  64. Lily

    I really hope neither of them learn that driving/riding in a car is a traumatic trigger for them. Last time both Becky and Joyce were in a car was during the most traumatizing event in their lives.

  65. Derek

    Well now I feel like a dork, I DEFINITELY could not drive at age 18 and even now (25) I don’t have a full licence :p

  66. Bagge

    JOYCE TAKE THE WHEEL!!!

    1. That One Guy

      I still hope historical Jesus will make an appearance here. JUST for that line.

  67. Gordon Blvd

    ever since yesterday, all I’ve been thinking is how her dad is seriously one cool mutha 😉

  68. Jacques Cornelius Parrot III

    Yep, I’m liking Joyce’s dad more with each new strip.

  69. moonrnr

    I own that same truck! I don’t suppose you designed that after a 97 Jimmy? LOL!

  70. BenRG

    Firstly, I predict that Hank won’t get a wink of sleep. Instead, he will, by the time they reach La Porte, be suffering from seriously elevated blood pressure and a phobic aversion to seeing Joyce in a driver’s seat. 😉

    Secondly, Joyce driving and Becky probably navigating. Why is the phrase that jumps into my mind: “No good can come of this“?

    Willis can either play this straight or next week will be Slapstick City.

  71. Itchy Brain

    Aww this is legit adorable.

  72. Senjiu

    I totally agree with Joyce’s dad. Getting in the car and NOT having to drive is awesome. I don’t care if the car industry is trying to sell the idea that we all want to drive, I want my car to drive itself. I want to watch a movie or take a nap, or code something or read a book or watch the landscape or pla cards with friends or … there’s so many things I’d rather do than drive!

  73. CianM1301

    Wow, Hank is more level-headed than I expected him to be.

  74. Catty

    I’ve never considered driving anything remotely resembling ‘awesome’. I never even got a car licence. Twice as many wheels as is desirable and too much extraneous metal!

  75. Flight03

    They’re gonna get stuck in traffic behind a bunch of brown Kias, then Becky and Joyce will have flashbacks and crash and die.

  76. What Was The Question Again?

    …aaaand straight into a truck driven by Ruthless.

  77. ERB

    I’m just waiting for the *crash* followed by Joyce: “Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh! I’m so sorry! I’m never driving again!” as she backs into a parked car.

  78. Jim

    OT – remember to vote Libertarian this November, everyone. 😉

    1. Commodore Jeep-Eep

      Jesus fucking christ, is there nowhere where these twerps don’t try to shit?

    2. Deanatay

      You mean, like that Sanders guy? I love him. 🙂

    3. Spencer

      Oh fuck, I forgot about that election that’s happening in ten months in another country.

    4. Rutee

      Why would I do a damn fool thing like that? Libertarians are the ones most in a rush to attack my rights.

  79. phildog

    I see what you’re doing Willis. I don’t see where you’re going with this, but we know this good stuff can’t last forever.

  80. Alexx

    I forgot driving was awesome IMMEDIATLEY. Once you realize that you pretty much have to do whatever the people in front of you are doing, it loses all luster, unless you’re a jackass and just weave in and out of lanes like you own the place. The only time driving is any fun is late at night when no one is on the road.

  81. whispl

    Driving is a terrible combination of being in a high-risk situation where you have to pay attention all the time, and nothing exciting ever happening. It’s like watching re-runs of the same boring episode over and over, because hidden in one of the playbacks there is a message, and if you miss it you could die

    1. Spencer

      This is like the best description for my driving experiences.

      Man things are kinda slo-whoops I almost died.

    2. drs

      Yeah, this. Also your (my) butt hurts from all that sitting. Maybe a better car would help, though I had decent rental cars.

      Alexx above says “The only time driving is any fun is late at night when no one is on the road.” Also that. Driving from Pasadena to La Cañada on the 210 at 2am was pretty cool. There was surprisingly no one else on the road (2002) and I could *floor* it, and if I had any residual difficulty staying between the lines… cf. no one else on the road. Would have gotten old after a while but it’s not that long a trip, and I didn’t do it that often.

      I’ll also grant that the *ability* to get to various places, like big parks or anywhere where you can see more stars, would be neat. (I let my license lap and haven’t renewed it.) But the actual act of driving, meh.

  82. Toes14

    A) Bloomington to La Porte is about 200 miles. It may take Mr. Brown 4 hours to make that trip, but I suspect Joyce will do it in closer to 3 hours and 10 minutes.

    B) That’s why he had kids? To laze back while they did chores/work? That seems like a really odd comment coming from him.

    1. Spencer

      People on occasion make these things we refer to as jokes. They’re facetious statements made with comedic intent for the point of provoking laughter from the recipients.

    2. Wublub

      A) For some reason, I see Joyce being a REALLY careful driver.

      B) This is what we with a sense of humor refer to as a “joke”. I highly doubt the ACTUAL reason he had children was so that they would do chores for him, considering raising a child seems like way more work than doing the dishes, or driving long trips every once in a while.

      1. Marie

        On the other hand, some parents do admit that it’s so their kids will take care of them when they get old (albeit not directly, but in a horrified reaction to the childless; ‘but who will take care of you when you are elderly!?’).

        But chores and driving yes, are almost if not always jokes.

        1. Spencer

          Maybe Hank and Carol just needed some extra farmhands.

      2. BenRG

        Joyce? Yes, a careful driver. Add Becky into the equation as a navigator and tempter (“Come on! I know you can go faster than this!”) and things might get a bit more… exciting.

  83. Gareth

    I can’t help but feel that Walky is lulling us into a false sense of security somehow.

  84. Björn

    And the car can be driven without voice commands containing the word “pony”…?

  85. trlkly

    Yeah, nowadays having a license at 18 isn’t a given, even in more rural towns. But this is the Brown family. I fully expect that they are a decade or two behind.

    I mean, fundamentalism is ultimately about a rejection of modernism. So cultural changes take longer. I bet that, where Joyce lives, everyone gets a license at 16, if not earlier with a hardship license. That’s what it was like for me in the early 2000s.

    (sorry if this has already been said. I haven’t read all the comments yet.)

  86. hythrain

    Does Joyce even have a license? Has this been brought up before?

    1. Lord Stoneheart

      Well she’s the age where she can have a full driver’s license and she lived in a small town before college so it’s not unusual.

    2. BenRG

      The fact that Hank is letting her drive strongly implies that the answer to your question is ‘yes’.

    3. Spencer

      I think it was retconned in from the last Crisis.

      1. Lord Stoneheart

        Did someone punch the universe again? Was it Mike?

        1. Spencer

          Retcon Punch was the best thing ever.

          Mostly because it serves as the perfect metaphor for DC writers smashing continuity until it’s the right one.

  87. BipedSnowman

    Is.. is he kind of hot? Or is that just me?

  88. Cerberus

    Heh, I’m happy to see that for Becky, cars have not become sources of trauma but rather opportunities of rad driving and adrenaline rushes.

    1. Bagge

      I wouldn’t be surprised to see her in some kind of extreme sport in a year or so.

      Becky: “BUNGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOO, WHAT A RUSH!!!!”
      Dina: “I’m falling, knowing that the rope will catch me… The rope caught me. Rush… Anyway, the Quetzalcoatlus was one of the largest flying creatures ever.”

  89. Bagge

    I didn’t catch it first reading but… This strip is AWESOME. Look at it. Becky and Joyce have normal funtime interaction without guilt, fear and trauma. For just this one car trip they can be their old goofy connected-by-the-hip-best-of-friends.

    Thanks to Hank, this car trip contain all the best things of their upbringing without all the bad stuff. “You are always welcome, Becky”. “I trust your judgement, Joyce.” “You drive, I’ll take a nap and leave the two of you to enjoy the trip.” Small things, but incredibly important.

    1. Willoughby Chase

      +1

    2. stevecharb

      As socially conservative religious fathers go, Hank at this point appears a true “Gallant” to Ross’s “Goofus”.

      Let’s see whether he maintains that when (probable spoiler) his “son” comes out as trans over Thanksgiving dinner.

      1. ChrisHerself

        And now I want a DOA-edition Goofus and Gallant SO. BADLY.

        Goofus uses a shotgun to resolve arguments.
        Gallant takes disagreements to the Lord in prayer.

        “I am familiar with the deceptress.”
        “I’m going to nod and smile a lot.”

        Goofus views his daughter as a possession and kidnaps her at gunpoint.
        Gallant trusts his daughter’s decisions on her path to adulthood.

        “I have been slack in my role, but no longer. I will restore my household.”
        “The Lord’s been telling me to listen to         you more.”

        Goofus uses love as an excuse for threats and misguided self-righteous personal sacrifice.
        Gallant expresses love by offering comfort and reassurance.

        “How much have you defied me?”
        “I trust you.”

        Goofus cannot be flexible in his convictions and gets punched in the face.
        Gallant tries to respect people who have different ideas than he does, even though it is difficult.

        “You’ve destroyed our family.”
        “You’re always welcome, Becky.”

        1. heyman

          Awwww!
          Nice highlighting of the last few weeks. 😉

        2. ChrisHerself

          And broken italics I won’t ever be able to fix </3

        3. stevecharb

          Very nice job.

        4. Bagge

          Nice comparison.

  90. Joy Baker

    Wait, you’ve been doing this since 1998?!?!?

    1. Spencer

      97, actually. That was when Roomies started.

  91. Kugai

    It could be worse, it could be BECKY behind the wheel.

  92. Willoughby Chase

    “I just need that fence painting white …”

    Joyce’s face in last panel is great!

  93. -JAD-

    So… after 18 years of being born into existence, Joyce begins to drive. I’d say it’s appropriate.

  94. DinaWho

    Joyce-us take the wheel.

    1. ChrisHerself

      Take it from my hands
      Cause I could use a nap right now

  95. Just Me

    Question–why is Becky just wearing a short sleeve shirt when just about everyone else is wearing a jacket or something similar? Isn’t she cold?

    1. Bagge

      Nah she’s HOT.

      (Seriously, Becky strikes me as the sort of person who don’t see any correlation between outside temperature and clothing)

  96. Tenn

    Consecutive strips without Hank saying something horrible: 5 😀

    *throws a pre-inauguration party for the “6” sign* 😀

    1. random832

      So, if Carol says something horrible does the sign go to 0, or is it exclusively for Hank?

      1. Tenn

        This one’s for Hank in this particular scene (as soon as we cut away to other characters, it stops being relevant), but I suppose they’ll have to share a counter between them when they’re in the same scene.

        Wait, why am I treating this seriously? :/

        1. Spencer

          Because it’s Dumbing of Age and we’ve lost control of our lives.

  97. Lummo

    “That’s why I had kids” …the sort of thing my dad said when I was shoveling snow, mowing the lawn, detailing the car. Frankly I miss him and wouldn’t mind laying down a few chores ffor the old man.

  98. Shadow-DJ

    Heh, at least Joyce’s dad is a decent person in most regards ;;; He’s nothing like that punk of a neighbor, that’s or sure. Lets hope Mrs. Brown will be good ;;

  99. Griffin

    18 is babies, and babies shouldn’t drive cars.

    I know because I’m 18 myself.

  100. Dongopolis

    WHEW! Finally caught up with this beast of a webcomic. I read the first few strips when they came out five years ago, thought it was cool, and… completely failed to follow up until now. WOO.

    So I’m glad there’s at least one functional parent here, despite all the baggage he’s carrying. The strip needs this after the Bad Dad Brigade’s 1st annual shithead parade.

    1. ChrisHerself

      Bad Dad Brigade’s 1st Annual Shithead Parade

      ……I’m pining for this book title that could have been.

  101. Mr. Random

    Aaaaand flashback to my dad.

  102. Liliet

    Ha. My dad keeps pretending to just NOT HAVE TIME AND OPPORTUNITY to teach me to drive (I know he’s pretending because he damn well finds some for my brother WHO IS 6 YEARS YOUNGER) after he’s discovered he really DOESN’T have any reasonable explanation for why he doesn’t want to.
    (No, dad, ‘your mom is awful at it and hates it’ is not a good enough confirmation of your sexist preconceptions to deny it to me. Mom also dislikes bicycles and I love them, we are kind of different people)

  103. Hielario

    He sounds like my father. Every time i’m helping with something strenous, he goes like “Wow having kids is pretty good”:

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