179

Grunt
Posted on April 26, 2025 by David M Willis

179 thoughts on “Grunt”

  1. NGPZ

    what’s his Beef? 😛

    1. True Survivor

      I know. He is being something of a bull-y.

      1. J-Earl

        Nah, nah, nah. He’s wanting her to praise him for knowing how to open a door.

        1. J-Earl

          He stunned from giving a prolonged squawk.

        2. Arianod

          But is he shagged out?

    2. clif

      I don’t understand how we didn’t see this coming.

  2. Ana Chronistic

    Sarah just has a beefcake smorgasbord coming up

  3. Animedingo

    Live with me if you want to come

    1. Longshot97

      I sincerely hope that you came up with that originally, because that is pure genius. My respects.

      1. PedanticJerkass

        They did not.

    2. Justnobodyfqwl

      I hope willis deletes every comment on this page except for this one, just to really cement it in as the best to ever do it

    3. AGV/Ruby

      10/10 no notes

    4. Steamweed

      Best proposal ever.

    5. eh, whatever

      I may not be a big strong man, but I do have tears in my eyes.

    6. gnomedeplume

      congratulations on being featured on the Willis bluesky

      1. Animedingo

        WHAT

  4. Schpoonman

    …That’s Duke Nukem.

    1. Doctor_Who

      Can’t be, he isn’t quoting Bruce Campbell or Roddy Piper.

      …Probably. I must confess, I don’t speak Grunt very well.

      1. Schpoonman

        He’s, uh, still waking up from a nap.

      2. PedanticJerkass

        Even Groot uses more words than Beef.

    2. Thag Simmons

      Somehow even less well spoken.

  5. Dot

    Six years later, Beef returns!

    1. Dot

      This is also the first time he’s had lines in 15 years!

      1. Devin

        Truly he is a man of few words grunts

      2. DashWallkick

        “Lines” is obviously stretching it a little.

    2. Opus the Poet

      Not much of a vocabulary, is it? Not it isn’t.

    3. Mr. Random

      Where’s the beef?

      1. Roborat

        I knew someone would throw this line out.

  6. Nadamás

    Finally Walkyverse best character make his triumphant return!

  7. Joe Moose

    I’m with Sarah. XD

  8. Lauralot

    Max Headroom?

    1. Doctor_Who

      Ironically he doesn’t seem to have enough headroom at all.

  9. Sirksome

    Beef has gotten away with so much bullshit for how little he says and how little he appears.

  10. Nono

    I didn’t expect this height issue of Sarah’s to actually become a real, reoccuring thing that might break down her first real relationship.

    It might not! But we’ll see.

    1. Nadamás

      I believe she likes Tony enough that she is willing to go outside her comfort zone for it, both emotionally and physically.

    2. DailyBrad

      I don’t think it’ll be an issue, ultimately, she still seemed plenty willing to get railed by Tony.

    3. Sirksome

      You can find people attractive that you wouldn’t date and be surprised in being attracted to people that don’t have all your preferences. I think Sarah has been discovering that.

  11. darkoneko

    Sarah, don’t make him have Beef with his probably roommate

    1. DailyBrad

      I thiiiink they said Tony has his own room, I could be wrong, though. Beef may just be visiting since football.

      1. Sirksome

        They must just live in the same hall. Background lore seems to be implying that at least. They all definitely know each other.

        1. Sirksome

          The football team to be specific. Don’t know why I didn’t type that.

    2. HueSatLight

      Beef lives in McNutt.

      1. Arianod

        Well, that strip aged like milk

        1. Amara

          I mean it WOULD be on brand for Robin to somehow be completely ignorant of all the nonsense happening outside her focus zone.

      2. HueSatLight

        also this non-bonus strip, titled “McNutt”, lol.

        1. Jeff K!

          Interestingly, in the comments on that strip someone pointed out that through no fault of his own, Beef always appears just before major bad things start to happen in the strip.

          I haven’t verified, but if true he’s like DC’s Pariah.

  12. Cattleprod

    Finally, an answer to the question, “Where’s the Beef?”

    1. Steamweed

      He’s the wall that isn’t painted.

  13. jeffepp

    Honey, the new threesome just dropped!

    1. Steamweed

      Sarah breathes heavy at the thought of a TSB sandwich.

  14. DailyBrad

    Beef is one of those guys that I figured would always be basically a background gag, so it’s kind of fun to see him get… I guess you could call this a spotlight strip.

  15. Suet

    strong, grunting type

    If he says he’s got Beef, that I’m a vegetarian and I ain’t scared of him

    1. clif

      That’s so Suet.

  16. Cholma

    *grunts*

  17. BBCC

    Oh, hey, Beef!

    You’re not the Tony she’s looking for!

  18. NGPZ

    Quite an impressive buffer, May the 4th be with you, Willis. <3

    *plays Star Wars Theme on hacked muzak*

  19. RassilonTDavros

    Oh hey, there’s the Beef!

  20. Laura

    Beef seems to be a perpetual bystander to Bad Stuff Going Down

    1. HueSatLight

      or participant

  21. Shakes

    Brace for incoming Walkyverse nostalgia posting!

  22. Charles Phipps

    Sal and Walky’s brother!

    1. staszu13

      Switched at birth. In this universe, no switch

  23. Qube

    I want to believe that Beef is DoA’s version of Morn from DS9

    1. Cybersnark

      Constantly chatting about everything, but never on-camera.

      1. Qube

        he’ll blab your ear off if you let him

  24. Yumi

    Tony has a single, but Beef probably lives next door. To the left.
    …none roommate with left Beef.

    1. Ray Radlein

      +1

      -1

    2. StClair

      oh, well played.

    3. Laura

      Hmm?

      No comprendo.

      1. Strain of Thought

        It’s a reference to an internet meme about an absurd pizza order made through an app that let you put in things no human should eat.

      2. Strain of Thought

        Here I dug it up: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/None_Pizza_with_Left_Beef

        1. Laura

          Huh. Ok, thanks! I appreciate the explanation!

    4. Jerach

      It’s an older meme, but it checks out.

    5. Qube

      boo hiss shoelaces etc

  25. Ray Radlein

    Boy I kind of hope he’s Walky’s brother in this universe too

    1. staszu13

      He wasn’t there either, technically

      1. PedanticJerkass

        Maybe the yet-to-be-revealed twist is that Beef is Walky’s brother in this universe, somehow.

        1. James

          You thought it would be Tony, but IT WAS I! BEEF!

    2. Lingo

      Maybe they’ll both join the same frat someday.

  26. Taffy

    I don’t see Beef mattering in the future, any more than he’s mattered in the past.

    1. HueSatLight

      Main antagonist of spring semester.

      1. Jamie

        At least it’s not another dad.

      2. HueSatLight

        but yes. he’s been little more than a prop so far. a giant goon to make a group more menacing, a punchline, background decoration. The most he’s been is a sounding board who doesn’t really reply, twice now.

    2. John Campbell

      I mean, that’s what they thought in the Walkyverse…

      1. Taffy

        I will never learn who Beef Walkyverse is. Never ever.

  27. mindbleach

    In which Sarah considers fucking one of the enemies from Quake.

  28. Thag Simmons

    1. Thag Simmons

      well at least now I know how to do an emptypost

      this was supposed to be “[Grunt]” but I used the > brackets that mark HTML tags

      1. PedanticJerkass

        <Grunt>

        1. PedanticJerkass

          For reference, that was (&)lt(;)Grunt(&)gt(;) but without the parentheses.

        2. Jamie

          &lt;Grunt&>

        3. Jamie

          Aw, I screwed it up.

        4. PedanticJerkass

          And… I guess that should actually be >Grunt<? >_>

  29. Kyulen

    I forgot about Beef, but then we haven’t seen him much in DoA. I wonder if we’ll ever see him talk. If not I wonder if there’s an in-universe explanation for why he only grunts.

  30. staszu13

    My translation of the Beefsteak:

    “Yes, milady? What can I do for you?”

    “Terribly sorry, Tony has a single room across the hall. He isn’t in though.”

    (Responding to Sarah’s compliment) “You flatter me, miss.”

    “I’ll tell him you’ve been by when he returns. Cheers!”

    1. staszu13

      Sorry should have read Beefspeak not steak

      1. clif

        No, no. You had it right the first time. Works perfectly.

    2. PedanticJerkass

      He’s totally wearing a fedora right now, but we just can’t see it because of the top of the door frame.

    3. Nadamás

      Such a gentleman.

      1. staszu13

        Offensive linemen generally are

        1. David M Willis

          he’s an inoffensive lineman

        2. Roborat

          Hah, good one.

        3. staszu13

          Beats being defensive

  31. staszu13

    Oh Willis, I assume Beef’s proper name here is Steven Waters, as he was never switched at birth?

    1. David M Willis

      Walters and yes

      1. staszu13

        Thanks

  32. TheFlamingonator

    “Sorry, my Grunt is a little rusty. Could you repeat that?”

  33. apricot

    Finally. I’ve been waiting for Beef’s time in the spotlight.

  34. GUIGUI

    BEEF!

  35. Fireprincesslily

    Honestly I know he’s a whole different Beef but I’m still holding a Walkyverse grudge over his betrayal.

    1. Fireprincesslily

      Oh apparently his character was introduced bullying Danny with his two buddies. And letting them beat up Danny.

      So yeah grudge firmly justified.

  36. Bryy

    WE HAVE BEEF!

  37. Da Boy

    Yo when did they de-age Arnold and send him to College?

  38. foducool

    the actual Doorman

    1. Da Boy

      The Okami Blockhead, you need to strike his weak points to pass

      1. Taffy

        Oh my god, fuck that son of a bongo. That rat bastard held up my bead collection for an unforgivable amount of time.

  39. LIGHTWEIGHT BAYBEE

    yey beef 🙂

    it’s also been 6 years since he’s shown up damn

  40. Arianod

    I didn’t expect Duke Nukem :O

    1. Needfuldoer

      Beef’s grunts provided by special guest star Jon St. John.

  41. Hazel

    Should I know this guy?

    1. clif

      Yes, but only because there are other Willis comics you should binge.

      Click on his name in the tags for previous in-universe appearances.

  42. Charlotte

    I had no idea we’d seen this guy before, but based on perusing the tag, he’s always in the wirst places/situations. I don’t think I like him.

    Also, Sarah, no.

    1. Charlotte

      Sigh, *worst*

      1. Thing2

        Could have been worse, could have been wurst…

      2. HueSatLight

        Beef, du wirst immer …

    2. Tarkara

      It’s good idea to never trust Beef. I hope Sarah doesnt have anything more to do with him.

    3. Steamweed

      Per the tags, he was there when Amazi-Girl and Sal followed the roofying rapist-wannabe and then fought the bros. But Beef was just there; he didn’t say or do anything.

      1. Holly

        He was also present and intimidating for when Danny was about to get beaten up, wearing the same red shirt as the ones who threw a punch at Danny, helping to surround him and doing nothing to de-escalate.

  43. Needfuldoer

    Where’s the Beef?

    Oh, there he is.

    1. Steamweed

      Beef: The Fifth Wall

  44. BorkBorkBork

    If my intuition is right on these things- and its ALWAYS right on these things – I’m pretty sure that this Beef was sent back in time by General Donna Mae Warner, Leader of the Resistance against the Soggies, to save Mike Warner, who is in danger of being killed before he and Amber can conceive humanity’s last hope or something.

    … hey, nobody said Beef was *good* at his job.

    1. clif

      That’s alarmingly plausible.

  45. Rabisch

    The start of a love triangle?

  46. Thing2

    Is Sarah worse than Joe was, then?

    1. clif

      By what metric?

    2. HueSatLight

      No.

    3. Taffy

      No. What even lead to that question?

    4. thejeff

      No, but this really isn’t a good look. Especially since she’s here to meet her boyfriend(?)

      Sees one hot guy and just dives straight into openly objectifying him. Same behavior Jacob objected to, but without even the fragile friendship they’d built.

      1. Li

        She’s not flustered or googly-eyed, though. I think this is just a one-off joke about how technically Beef is her type, which Willis won’t be building on.

        Just a guess, though.

        1. thejeff

          Possible. Not sure I buy it though. I think he’s doing something more interesting with Sarah’s arc and this fits it too well.

        2. Li

          Agree to disagree on whether that would be more interesting, heh.

          I feel like Sarah already experienced appropriate consequences for how she treated Jacob.

  47. Tessea

    Noooo! Cursed scene change!

  48. Mr.Morningstar

    of course beef is tony’s roomate.

  49. Amós Batista

    …n’t be a trap, please don’t be a trap, please don’t be a trap, please do…

  50. Crow

    Telling every buff man you meet exactly how horny you are about them because you’re so good at communication now

  51. Mr. Random

    The forgotten Walkerton sibling in both universes.
    … actually, it’d be a huge twist if he was actually half-siblings to Walky and Sal.
    It’d make the timeline with Linda and the Dean a LOT more wonky.

    1. Taffy

      People keep saying things about Tony and Beed being related to the twins, despite the complete lack of evidence for it.

      1. Jeff K!

        Since Beef has almost never appeared in this comic, people are discussing his appearances in the series “It’s Walky!” in which he plays a much much bigger role.
        In that series, he was introduced as Walky’s twin brother.

        Because the villain who caused that sequence of events is only a cartoon character here, Walky and Beef have never met.

        Also in that universe, Linda was married to Anthony McHenry Sr. for a while, and he’s the Dean here.

        1. thejeff

          That last was in this universe, but people keep wanting to extend some variation of the relationship between Beef/Walky from the Walkyverse into DoA

        2. Taffy

          I’m aware of those things from that comic. They’re not a point of confusion.

        3. Nadamás

          Then what is it?

        4. Taffy

          What is what?

        5. Nadamás

          The point of confusion.

        6. BorkBorkBork

          To recognize when there is a contradiction between information that someone is receiving and the knowledge and beliefs that someone has, and to create a need to resolve that discrepancy in a logical way, rather than to simply ignore it or make broad assumptions.

        7. Taffy

          There isn’t one.

        8. Nadamás

          @Bork I have no idea what you mean with this.

        9. Taffy

          They’re explaining what the point of confusion itself is, as a concept, because your wording was ambiguous enough to allow for a gag.

        10. Nadamás

          That is annoying.

        11. Taffy

          It’s fine.

        12. Nymph

          It made me laugh.

      2. HueSatLight

        Brother from another mother. and father. who’ve never met, nor have any of their parents, nor are any of them related.

      3. Yumi

        Yes, it’s fun.

  52. Stephen Nedland

    How ironic would it be if Beef’s Major was English Communication?

  53. Jdorr

    Orcas! I just checked the “Beef must have shown up often” claim by looking at his tag and the first time he showed up was the first scene with Amazi-Girl. Then he was there just to be dismissed, then he was at a scene where our scar faced friend was who got beat up by Amazi-Girl, then he was a background character. I really hope for Sarah that the pattern I noticed isn’t true because next up in the pattern is someone deserving gets fought by Amazi-Girl

    1. Jdorr

      I did not mean to type “orcas!” there.

      I also didn’t mean to hit report on my own comment, definitely seems a design issue (atleast on mobile) that report and reply are that close to each other

    2. David M Willis

      honestly he’s only in the political rally scene because Sal says “beef” in a sentence and I thought it’d be funny if that summoned him

      1. Jeff K!

        Okay, you were correct; that IS funny!

  54. Dwampre Scorrigank

    I kinda hope we start seeing more of Beef, I just realized that he has potential to be a such an interesting character in the dumbiverse.

    1. Taffy

      Yeah, standing around grunting has so much potential.

      1. Dwampre Scorrigank

        Hey, some people don’t have that deep of communication skills, doesn’t necessarily make them shallow people.

        1. Taffy

          Irrelevant.

  55. Looney

    BEEF IS HERE

  56. Deanatay

    Sarah: Wait. Physical Adonis, taller than me, doesn’t speak?? He checks ALL of my check boxes! Unless… is your penis… proportional?

    Beef: *grunt*

    Sarah: …*bites lip* I’ll take that as a yes! *jumps him*

    1. Taffy

      Now, there’s a thought. I’m not sure any of these characters have expressed a preference for dick size.

  57. AnonGrouch

    translation: hey there pretty lady
    translation: Enough about you, let’s talk about me, Beef.
    translation: Man I /am/ pretty
    (yes I am just pretending beef is Johnny Bravo at this point why not)

  58. Jade

    Do we have confirmation of Beef’s last name?

    I’m hoping it’s Wellington.

    Or maybe Stroganoff? (maybe if Sarah wasn’t already seeing Tony…).

    1. David M Willis

      It’s Walters, which was always the name of his biological parents. He was raised by them in this universe.

      1. staszu13

        Yeah dunno why I had it as Waters. Me and my horrible old guy memory

  59. 0kami

    Beef.

    It’s what’s for dinner.

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