207

Interrogation
Posted on July 18, 2014 by David M Willis

207 thoughts on “Interrogation”

  1. An Average Loser

    Dammit Mike.

    1. Jen Aside

      Joke’s on Amazi-Girl! Mike is actually short for Micron.

      Like, the type of pen used to draw dicks.

      Except they’re too thin and the joke doesn’t work.

      [dammit]

  2. Yotomoe

    Guess we’ll add Public Display of affection to that list.

    1. newllend

      You would getting punched in the face count as getting to second base for Mike?

      1. Doctor_Who

        No, punching is first base. Groin kicks are second. Sex with you is third. Sex with your gay friend to drive a wedge between you is a home run.

        Sex with your mom is mere flirting.

        1. Anarchy 101

          Mike is a masochist? He’s always seemed like the sadistic one to me.

        2. Jen Aside

          http://www.shortpacked.com/index.php?id=1167

        3. Anarchy 101

          I stand corrected.

        4. LeslieBean4Shizzle

          That is one of my top three favorite Mike moments.
          The link, I mean.
          Today’s comic might rank in the top 20 favorite Mike moments though.
          Also… am I mistaken, or is this the first time this ship has launched in the Dumbverse?

        5. Ben

          Pretty sure it is.

        6. Nurrah

          It’s the first time I’ve noticed it. I like Mike. I don’t know why, I’m an extremely passive person that prefers to be nice.

          Just something hawt about Mike.

          (This is also one of my favourite ships in Walkyverses)

        7. Deanatay

          It’s launched a few times in the comments section, but this is the first time it’s appeared in the comic, so consider this the official launching ceremony.

        8. No

          Our language is pain and pain is a two lane street.

        9. Nobody

          Nah, it’s gotta be something big enough to have a carpool lane.

        10. Led

          Well, it COULD be both… or his entire plan in antagonizing and being an asshole to people is that they’ll punch him 😀

        11. tinfoil theory

          Maybe Mike strictly adheres to the Golden Rule (not the one about the one with the gold making the rules, the other one), and then what is the difference between a sadist and a masochist anyway.

        12. Slinx

          In short, sadists like hurting people, masochists like being hurt.

        13. tinfoil theory

          I meant: What is the difference if you treat others the way you want to be treated.

        14. Guest Person Dude

          From a psychological standpoint, many people who are emotionally masochistic will act horribly to the world, hoping to spur on the kind of response they enjoy most. Usually, once they find someone specific to ‘satisfy’ their desires, they knock it off. Wonder what it’s gonna be with this guy.

        15. Nobody

          Why can’t he be both?

    2. thatindianguy

      Since when is PDA illegal.

  3. Mr. Random

    The universe is sending a message. Through hormones.

    1. Anarchy 101

      Has Amazi-Girl found a use for her Amazi-Condoms?

      1. newllend

        To late, Dorothy and Walky used them all.

      2. Maveric1984

        Too bad Walky already used them. She hasn’t had enough time to go buy more, what with beating up her father and being exposed by the press and whatnot

  4. rossalupus

    thats how you do it mike

    1. Doctor_Who

      You’ve an unnecessary word in that sentence.

      1. dethtoll

        Took me a second. Bravo.

      2. Marathoner

        Maaaaan, I feel slow for not figuring out what you meant at first. 5/5 a++ would read again

  5. Darwin

    Only justice moistens her loins!

    1. tinfoil theory

      Unsurprisingly, there’s a subreddit for just that.

    2. Deanatay

      Lawful Lady Boners!

  6. Ashley

    That position is… quite interesting.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      The inverted cowgirl?

  7. shadowcell

    there’s a reason amazigirl’s arm is blocking ken’s crotch in panel 3, i’m sure

    1. Cholma

      Because is ALSO turn on by Justice!

      1. Cholma

        Because Ken*

        (arrgh! typos!)

  8. BL

    that was not quite how i expected mike to handle this

    1. nekobawt

      really? that was exactly how i expected it to go down, so to speak. pointing out the weak spots in people’s so-called moral high-grounds is basically how he rolls.

      1. AtomsOrSystems

        Yeah, Mike’s ability to use (occasionally hilarious) armor-piercing questions and comments is really his best quality. Otherwise he would just be an unrepentant asshole saying asshole-ish things while living a desperate existence in a make-believe world with people he barely knows and doesn’t care about.

        …holy shit, Mike is the comment section. He’s our avatar!

        1. Mc

          He´s the hero we deserve, but Amazi-girl is the one we need right now.

        2. timemonkey

          Personally I could do without Captain Crazy.

        3. Jerden

          I couldn’t. I’d have nobody to relate to!

    2. Pumpkin Cake

      I bet Mike immediately knew that it was Amber and decided to unsettle her.

  9. newllend

    Welcome to the club Mike.

  10. Maveric1984

    There it is!

  11. JediAutobot

    Ken! 🙂

  12. Emperor Kiva

    That’s kinda scary……RUN AMAZI-GIRL!

  13. John

    Hey, it’s Arnold and Blanka!

    1. Catullus

      No, that’s not right. It’s Chun-Li, isn’t it?

      1. Jackson

        Sol Badguy?

    2. Rutee

      So they’re banging now? I thought sexuality didn’t change between universes!

      1. AgentKeen

        We know Ken likes women, but we don’t necessarily know he doesn’t like guys?

      2. StClair

        It could be that they’re just roommates, you know. People who share a room. And nothing else.

        I realize that years spent on the internet may have conditioned you (speaking in the general) to assume that everyone who appears together in a scene are either sleeping together or want to, but astonishingly, this is not always the case in real life.

        1. Rutee

          But Willis clearly says it’s a ship tease! Has Willis ever lied to or mislead us?

  14. Archivist

    That is not the ship tease, Willis.

    1. BigDrahma

      “Would you ship me? I’d ship me so hard!”

    2. newllend

      I rather have that ship get BOMBED pearl harbor style than see happen again.

  15. timemonkey

    Finally, someone reacts the way I’ve been wanting them to react to this nonsense. She’s lucky he didn’t yell her name and reveal her identity to everyone.

    Now, we’ve had Malaya, Ken and Arnold. so the question on everyone’s mind; how long until we get DoA Fuckface?

    1. Rutee

      In a dorm? Probably a long while, no matter how clean iguanas are.

      1. timemonkey

        He wasn’t supposed to be in the toystore either.

    2. Jason

      I’m just wondering when/if Lucy shows up. She’s the only major SP! character not to appear yet, and I haven’t seen her in any of the sneak-peak panels posted on Willis’s tumblrs, either (saw Ken and Arnold weeks ago).

      1. timemonkey

        We probably won’t be seeing glimpses of her until after Shortpacked ends.

      2. Cacturne

        Cough cough Ninja Rick cough cough

  16. Nick Piers

    And then they baaaaaaaaang.

    What? Kiss? No no no. We’re jumping right to the banging here, folks.

    1. tinfoil theory

      What about Danny?

      1. saltchocolate

        He’s got Sal, now. Or soon. Though that makes my head spin.

        1. MissQuinn

          Sex with Sal will be making Danny’s head spin too.

  17. caesaria82

    The parallel universe chemistry is strong with these two 😉

    1. Anarchy 101

      I have a feeling that this will devolve into passionate hate – sex in the middle of the hallway.

      1. Maveric1984

        A most epic of hate fucks if you will.

        1. LeslieBean4Shizzle

          Well, Willis did say that his next Slipshine would be from the Dumbverse. A way, perhaps, to both have his proverbial cake and eat it as well? And by cake I mean !@&$.

        2. tinfoil theory

          Your post was garbled towards the end. Astonishing it managed to complete at all.

        3. timemonkey

          He already did a Mike/Amber porn comic. Doing another so soon would be a bad idea.

      2. vonnegut

        Stop teasing. Damn.

  18. AgentKeen

    Man, I ship all of that.

    I mean, I’d go more for a Lucy-Ken-Arnold poly thing, but that’s just me being weird.

    1. MM

      I find myself oddly intrigued by your ideas.

    2. Anarchy 101

      Maybe with a little Carla added in for variety.

  19. MM

    Oh, yeah, baby. Quote regs at me.

  20. Sporky

    Mike totally knows it’s Amber doesn’t he. You can just tell.

    1. An Average Loser

      Mike knows all, including your mom.

    2. sylvester crow

      He interogated her mom for a nickle to obtain that info…and by interogated i mean [insert favorite dirty thought here].

      1. Jackson

        Mike knows your mom in the biblical sense.

    3. newllend

      If he can figure out that Sal had sex with Jason than I would be surprised if he couldn’t figure this out.

      1. Rutee

        Not even mike claims to have figured out that Sal and Jason nailed.

        1. tinfoil theory

          Mike has been known to fudge facts before.

          I say that Mike knew perfectly well what Sal was doing with Jason, and denied it so they wouldn’t stop doing it. Not for altruistic reasons, of course; the payoff would be their embarrassment when they inevitably learn that everyone knew their carefully kept shameful (for different reasons each) dirtly little secret, amplified by how nobody even gave a fuck.

          Of course I am probably wrong.

  21. BigDrahma

    God dammit enough with the ads that open the App Store! AUGH!

    1. David M Willis

      it would be helpful if you could provide information on ads that are doing dumb things if you are getting ads that are doing dumb things

    2. Rachel Roth

      I’ve heard that information necessary to identify these adds include the advertisement image and the website it leads to. I’m guessing the “app store” (not sure which device) doesn’t give you the URL though.

    3. Ocbrad1

      Haven’t had that happen on DoA or Willis’ other comics, but I have had it happen (just this morning) on Magick Chicks. Just closed the App Store too quickly to see which ad it may have been.

      1. Dreizehn

        If you’re using a browser with a debug or logging console opening that and visiting the page to replicate it helps. It’s how I found out that certain ads on other sites were opening a page that tried to install scareware a few months ago.

  22. JessWitt

    Yay, more new faces in familiar places!

  23. Catullus

    Oh, Mike. Never change.

    1. JessWitt

      Only when he’s drunk.

      1. sylvester crow

        And thwre is nothing more wrong than a hammered Mike.

        1. cmd1095

          drunk Mike is just plain creepy

        2. newllend

          Has he gotten drunk yet in this universe?

        3. Anarchy 101

          I don’t think so, but it’s only a matter of time.

        4. TJ Baltimore

          Everyone wants to see it, so he will probably never do it. Mike’s assholery extends beyond the fourth wall!

        5. Milosh

          Not yet.

          It took years and years before it was ever brought up in SP!

        6. Jason

          He is underage…not that I’d expect that to stop him.

    2. Yotomoe

      But then his clothes would be all funky.

  24. Miao

    Mmm yes there is my OTP

    1. John

      Which pair?

      1. gwalla

        Ken/Trapper Keeper

  25. Elva Rodríguez

    <3 I love Mike and Amber and I would never hate this ship teasing

  26. arank11

    Mike and Amber are going to pound each other in the most epic of hatefucks in this universe too, aren’t they?

    1. Yotomoe

      I think she’s just gonna pound him.

    2. Anarchy 101

      Its destiny. Might as well get it over with right there and then instead of dragging it out.

    3. LWS

      But will Mike charge her a nickel for the ride?

  27. newllend

    I like both these character’s but I hate the idea of them being together in this universe don’t know.

  28. GoogerGeiger

    MaAPEOitMEoH!!!

    1. nekobawt

      what

      1. shietka

        Mike and Amber Pound Each Other in the Most Epic of Hatefucks

        1. nekobawt

          ah, thank you, i thought googer was speaking in tongues or something.

          much like mike spoke to your mom’s tongue last night, etc

  29. parismio

    He would be.

  30. Zaphod Beeblebrox

    And so it begins…

    1. Anarchy 101

      The most epic of hate fucks has begun to take place! Quickly, we need an old priest, and a young priest.

      1. Jacknoir

        Kinky

      2. gwalla

        And a rabbi.

  31. Tom Speelman

    Arnold! Arnold! Arnold!

  32. MarcinMN

    Amber is Tyrael!

  33. Zelda

    [checks]
    I’ve got wood.

    1. Disloyal Subject

      I’ll gladly trade you some wool for it.

      1. TheKid

        I’ll trade you one stone and a brick. (yay Catan!)

    2. Deanatay

      For sheep! 🙂

  34. Jake

    This page has “RED HERRING” written all over it. Except for that one spot where Ken and Arnold are standing.

    1. Nobody

      Unless Ken winds up with Ethan.

      You know you want to see it, folks.

  35. nekobawt

    just picturing ruth seeing them, muttering “whatever” and stepping over them to get into the room so she can talk to billie. or stare moodily at her. either or.

  36. Rachel Roth

    Good, now he’s too busy to screw up Ruth’s talk with Billy.

    1. AgentKeen

      You underestimate Mike.

  37. MsSchiff

    I’d ship ’em like Batman and Catwoman.

  38. Twirls

    Wow, he actually looks kind of surprised in the second panel

  39. Godozo

    Mike’s acting as I would expect him to – sexualize everything.

    Amazi-Girl/Amber? Unexpected – but then I’m not exactly looking to connect Shortpacked to DoA.

  40. Kathleen

    What if… In this universe, Mike pursues *her*! He could even blackmail her into dating him, get a little universe karma.

    1. saltchocolate

      I love any possible way they might end up together! I so missed this ship . . .

  41. Rabid Rabbit

    So Mike is going to be a lawyer. That is disturbingly apt.

    1. bilfred

      He would just walk into the courtroom and bait the other lawyer until they had a breakdown.

    2. MM

      Would a Lawsome joke be out of line here?

  42. Rutee

    Okay, that’s fantastic. I love his surprise. “Did Amber just tackle me and turn me on? What the hell is this shit?”

    1. nekobawt

      i initially misread it as “kinda turned on right now, aren’t you?” i’m glad that’s not what it actually said, though. this way they’re on an even footing.

      …sort of, i mean she tackled him, so there’s that.

  43. Ben

    Well. Right then, that I didn’t see coming, though I really should have.

  44. Idon'tcarenomore

    Indeed! This is exactly how Mike reacts to every situation…any way that you do not expect him to act.

    And yeah, she probably did turn him on. And she is not immune either.

  45. Tandel

    C-c-c-combo breaker!

  46. Em

    Wait wait I don’t think Amazigirl would do Mike. Or Amber. Either persona would not do Mike. Because uh…isn’t she dating Danny? Isn’t that still a thing? I mean I might’ve missed something that would indicate that they weren’t. But I don’t think AmaziAmber would cheat on Danny. Turned on and sexually attracted sure! But actually fucking? No.

    1. nekobawt

      not to mention they were friends in high school. if they were going to hook up it probably would have happened by now. although she was dating ethan, and we have no idea when mike came into the equation (hurr hurr)….

    2. gwalla

      They’re kindasorta broken up. At least Danny seems to think so.

  47. Kernanator

    I identify with Amber. I too am turned on by abstract concepts depicted with blindfolds and scales.

    1. AtomsOrSystems

      So, uh…

      You doing anything Friday?

      1. vonnegut

        Gravatar makes this even funnier.

  48. Pyr05

    Actual things from reality bite brute-force superheroes in the butt.

  49. Jason

    It might be worth noting that Mike and Amber know each other from high school. Just saying.

  50. Katie

    I kind of love that even though they won’t be together in this universe, Amber and Mike still feel that weird attraction to each other even here.

    1. Disloyal Subject

      Do we know they won’t, though?
      Personally, I’m hoping they don’t, but still enjoying the parallel as you are – even though DoA is the only Willis comic I’ve read in its entirety.

      1. Nono

        I think most of the permanent relationships from other universes won’t be here – they might get explored, but chances are it’ll probably deviate from the other universal norm.

  51. kmkzchckn

    what if billie did the dicks with the express purpose of having amazigirl go after mike? like in a weird sort of.. i want to make something happen around here sort of way?

    1. vonnegut

      Why would Billie care?

  52. nothri

    That position is not good to be in for Mike while turned on. Could chap the willy, if you catch my drift.

    1. LWS

      Knowing Mike, the chafing could be part of the attraction.

    2. Deanatay

      You’re right – Willis might get upset. 🙂

  53. Beachfox

    Alt-Text is Best Alt-Text.

  54. nothri

    Wait, doesn’t Mike know who she is?

    1. The Steve

      Danny VS Mike for Amber’s heart! I can only see one of them as willing to play the sidekick, Amazi-Boy…

      1. Amazistool

        But i am already established as the side-kick!

        1. Deanatay

          No, you’re the kick-stand.

  55. Raibean

    Okay I know DoA isn’t going to go There as far as Amber/Mike because their characters are so different than in Shortpacked! but seriously otp

  56. Romanticide

    It was bound to happen eventually XD I am glad is now XD

  57. TakNuggins

    Y’know I’m starting to think Joyce drew the penises

  58. Deimir

    You can’t see it behind Amzi-Girl’s hand, but Ken and Arnold are actually walking down the hall with their arms linked. Ship has indeed set sail.

  59. Deanatay

    When will they make out?

    They should make out!

    Ken and Arnold, MAKE OUT NOW!!!

    1. timemonkey

      They need Lucy to appear first so she can use her ‘now kiss’ magic on them.

  60. Ikaru

    We know it will happen. Oh, my OTP will never fail. That and Mike and Amber. XD

    (Although they are my actual OTP)

  61. OmegaDez

    I like Mike. Mike is cool. Where isn’t there more stories that are centered around Mike?

    I don’t understand why readers always say Mike is an asshole. He’s not. He’s a voice of reason. A wake up call. I relate to Mike. (aside from the random punching)

    It’s like Lucy in Peanuts. People always say she’s a bongo. But she really isn’t. She’s Charlie Brown’s staunchest ally. She wants to protect him from this evil world he’s too nice to fully understand.

    1. Bagge

      Do you count him punching Joe in the face as random or would those be the reasonable punches?

      Sexual harassment of Joyce, crashing Gender Studies class and acting like a dick towards Walky and Billie in a vulnerable moment just a few strips ago comes to mind. Mike is an asshole.

      1. OmegaDez

        See, I don’t agree. I don’t remember the harassment thing. In the gender studies chapter, his intervention, while quite blunt, really helped Walky and Dorothy to understand each other a bit more, and, dare I say, helped their relationship get much better.

        And he wasn’t being a dick toward walky and billie. That was his way of saying “dude she’s your friend man up and deal with it”.

        He sure is blunt as hell and comes out as quite mean spirited. But he’s not acting that way for the sole purpose of being a dick.

        At least, it’s my interpretation of the character. And I really like him.

        (Granted, I have no previous experience of his Shortpacked! self. Maybe that would make him see him differently.)

        1. OmegaDez

          I’ll keep seeing Mike that way, until Willis himself comes and tells me outright : “Dez, you’re reading way too much into it. Mike is just an asshole.”

        2. Bagge

          I certainly agree with you that you can read Mike as you like. Also, I can see how people like Mike as a character rather than a person – he makes cool stories happens.

          But for me I have a hard time seeing him as something else than a bully.

          With Walky and Billie he could have offered sympathy, or he could just have slipped out and left them alone. OR he could stayed to take a few cheap shots at them, downright refuse to help even when Walky asks him to and then leave. Mike went with the third option. How is that helping anyone? How is that something else than being a dick?

          I’m not sure what the difference would be between coming out as mean spirited and being mean spirited, at least from the point of view of the recipient.

        3. Subb

          I don’t think Mike is /just/ an asshole. He has more going on definitely, but that doesn’t make him any less of an asshole and implying otherwise is just wishful thinking in my opinion.

        4. comnd

          That’s the same way I saw Mike when I started reading DoA. Still do see him that way, so long as I discount his alter egos in the other comics.

    2. timemonkey

      Mike is an asshole. Even he identifies as an asshole. He just manages to be helpful in the most dickish ways possible. In every case he’s helped there were better ways of doing so, he chose to do things the asshole way, because that’s just who he is.

    3. Pinja

      He’s an annoying douchebag long overdue for an unpleasant comeuppance and his absence from DOA is one of my fave things about it re > Shortpacked

      That “He just tell it like it is” is such bullshit. Whether or not he’s doing it (And sometimes he’s just being an ass) it doesn’t need to be expressed in such a dickish way. Worse he never suffers for it. When other characters are dicks people talk smack back.

      He’s a lame bully.

  62. Questionor

    When do we get to see Mike in a cat suit?

  63. Jen

    Squeee! Thank you, Willis, for this awesome Amber & Mike moment! 😀

  64. zebrathinker

    dammit! getting the cross-series doki-dokis over here

  65. Sambo

    Excellent onomatopoeia 😀

  66. Tenn

    Hovertext wins the internet.

  67. ATN

    JUSTICE!

  68. rachel

    this is SO ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUSLY HOT. oof

  69. Arkadi

    Amazi-girl uses Intimidate on Mike! It… goes as well as you’d expect XD

  70. Bibulb

    …Aaaaaannnnnd Slipshine.

  71. rayrayravona

    What is up with Amazigirl’s teeth?

  72. Waltz

    Whoawhoawhoa. You mean /this/ Mike is the same Mike from S*P that was a constant douche to everyone and the reason why I constantly tell my boyfriend to implement Redneck Trees in his campaigns? Or am I completely off base, which would not surprise me because I am /really/ fucking confused right now.

    1. David M Willis

      Shortpacked!, not Something*Positive.

      1. laughgirl

        I could have sworn the art and characters were the same.

        1. halcyon1234

          The two comics are exactly the same, except for the art, coloring, dialog, characters, plot, tone, theme, setting, universe, artist, title and URL.

  73. TJ Baltimore

    In my headcanon, Amber is wearing a strap-on right now.

  74. John

    Just noticed that the sound effect is blue and yellow. Cool.

    Also, I think the penultimate panel here is the first time I’ve ever believed that Mike’s hair was a thing that could happen.

  75. Maki P

    YES! YES! YOU KNOW YOU ARE MEANT TO BE DON’T FIGHT IT! (or… fight it, whatever’s hotter for you)

  76. Azmi

    Ship in a very small dingy

  77. JO512

    STOP RIGHT THERE CRIMINAL SCUM!

  78. Boomwolf97

    JUSTICE BONER MOTHER TRUCKER!!!

  79. Rorror

    Well, I don’t HATE him either, but I dislike him. He’s probably my least favorite of the often occurring characters.

    1. Rorror

      Well, that comment landed in the wrong place.

  80. Akahane

    K, I can’t help but ship this incarnation of these two. Much less creepy than the Shortpacked! version.

  81. The Magus

    Hang on, does Mike know that Amber’s Amazi-Girl as well, or was it just Ethan that she told?

  82. Aisling

    Sorry Mike, but those only apply to law enforcement officers, Amazi-girl is a vigilante.

  83. Jason

    I’ve re-read the archives several times and I have ONLY NOW realised exactly what Mike said in the last panel. I always thought he was saying “kinda turned on right now, aren’t you?”, assuming something about AG, rather than commenting on himself. I prefer the actual line.

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