290

Looking
Posted on October 7, 2014 by David M Willis

290 thoughts on “Looking”

  1. Jen Aside

    “Naked force has resolved more conflicts throughout history than any other factor.”

    1. Tunaro

      How well does half naked force solve things?

      1. The_Master

        This thread is getting rapey.

        1. Cacturne

          no guys, not the turkey baster
          less rapey, more drunky
          *although thats still pretty rapey*

      2. BrokenEye, True False Prophet

        I prefer a full frontal assault

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      And by naked force, you mean sex right? 😛

      1. nothri

        Solved and created more conflicts, then.

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          YUP! ^_^

        2. Robert

          “You will sign this treaty and I will see your penis” Said some foreign dignitary.

        3. nothri

          Well, “let’s make peace and your son can bang my daughter” was essentially the how feudal monarchies operated for a good 15 hundred years or so.

      2. Hinoron

        I always thought that quote referred to that, if my GF takes off all her clothes, I rapidly lose all interest in arguing with her.
        Works on me every time.
        …and I’m cool with that.

    3. Rosicrucian

      My mind can’t avoid reading that in superhero comic style.

      Like there’s some extradimensional force.

      Only accessible when you’re in your birthday suit.

      1. Jen Aside

        Starslipshine Troopers

        1. Opus the Poet

          “Starslipshine Crisis”?

        2. Opus the Poet

          For those unfamiliar: http://starslip.chainsawsuit.com/

      2. John

        Gives whole new meaning to “the Flash”.

      3. Tybert

        If you are 17 or older I point you towards Sex Criminals. That is literally the elevator pitch.

      4. gwalla

        You mean like this?

        http://nebezial.deviantart.com/art/now-you-know-410571226
        http://nebezial.deviantart.com/art/droppin-some-science-on-ya-418821212

    4. Mally

      Go Go Naked Force!

  2. Kerry

    WHAT DOES MIKE’S SHIRT SAY

    1. Tommy Fresh

      Just speculation, looks like it might say “You Eventually Die”

      1. Leorale

        Looks like one more word in there. You Will Eventually Die

        1. -Sentinel-

          Valar morghulis

        2. Carnex Zeta

          Valar morghulis means all men must die not you will eventually die

        3. StClair

          Remember, man, thou art mortal.

        4. JWLM

          Actually, the line is “Remember, man, that thou art dust,and to dust thou shalt return.” (Original Latin reads: “Meménto, homo, quia pulvis es, et in púlverem revertéris.”)

      2. liahansen

        I’m seeing, “You Ewoks! Die!”

        1. captainswift

          I vote for that one.

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          You will like this short video then. 😀

          http://youtu.be/5r_TlPwZOvU?t=56s

        3. fni

          i’m agreeing on the ewoks one.

    2. Dedlok

      Nothing because it lacks the mouth, tongue, teeth, larynx, and lungs to actually be able to say anything.

      1. Leorale

        Fine, then, what does the Fox say?

        1. liahansen

          “You will eventually die!”

          Foxes are frightening creatures indeed

        2. Leorale

          I actually lol’d. Well played.

        3. Dedlok

          “Yip.”

        4. Andrew

          “I want to believe.”

        5. Tenn

          “Get in behind me, Falco!”

        6. Jen Aside

          “Firefly is cancelled.”

      2. beege

        No one likes a literalist.

        1. liahansen

          Well, not “No one”, obviously…

        2. hof1991

          Figuratively speaking, no one likes a literalist.

    3. prime_pm

      “Stop Reading My Shirt”

      Incidentally, I used to have one of my own.

  3. AgentKeen

    Joyce and Dorothy: Campus Hoodlums!

    1. Ivan

      “Goddamit Joyce!” doesn’t get a reaction by this far down???

  4. MrSirk

    Joyce is really learning a lot a college isn’t she?

    1. RK

      Methinks that’s a tactic learned from a lifetime with older assumed-to-be-male siblings, not college.

      1. isitsevenyet

        Well in the other universe, she did have older brothers, so that’s very likely an accurate assumption.

        1. Disloyal Subject

          They’ve been confirmed here too, good sir. At least two, by my memory, one of whom’s been on-panel.

        2. Ian

          That was an older sister.

        3. RK

          But we HAVE seen Jocelyn tease Joyce, and Joyce thinks she’s her older brother, as Jocelyn isn’t out yet to her family. I wouldn’t put shin-kicking past either of them.

        4. mistrali

          Wasn’t there a panel where Joyce mentioned being possessive of her stuff due to having older brothers, plural?

    2. DudeMyDadOwnsADealership

      She ahead those two who think they’re a ‘cheerleader’ and a ‘valedictorian’ simply because that what they were about back in high school.

      College, especially university college, is, among other things, a time grow past that dog and pony show of high school. Any skills or bad habits they pick up here will actually have a real effect on how the leave their marks in life, for starters.

  5. Plasma Mongoose

    At least it wasn’t your balls Mike.

    1. nothri

      Thank god. He might of liked that.

      1. RavensLand

        Is it time to start shipping them yet?

        1. poofdepoof

          …but actually.

        2. Historyman68

          Mike/Mike’s Balls

        3. kimmibeans

          Not yet, but soon the time will be right.

      2. Plasma Mongoose

        There are weirder fetishes I suppose…

      3. Kelli

        He might’ve, indeed. He might have.

        1. neeks

          Thank you. Thank you SO MUCH.

    2. Paul

      If Mike was actually bothered by being kicked in the shins by someone not wearing shoes then he has no balls to worry about.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Maybe he has got glass femurs.

        1. saltchocolate

          Eggshell femurs…

        2. Opus the Poet

          Have to be to feel that much pain from getting kicked in the tibia…

        3. lightsabermario

          But he needs his femurs to live! Ah, who am I kidding, Mike could survive as a torso on hate alone.

        4. Lume

          But what if he gets drunk?

        5. Gigafreak

          Considering Sal doesn’t instantly lose consciousness from a single sip of alcohol in this universe as she does in the other one, Mike might not suddenly invert his temperament under the influence either.

        6. Lume

          Never seen Joyce and Walky, really. Only Shortpacked!

      2. Mattyos

        have you ever been kicked in the shins really hard by someone? it hurts like a motherfucker because it’s just bone and nerves there.

        1. DudeMyDadOwnsADealership

          Joyce is also strong and tends to hit hard.

        2. tinfoil theory

          “Guys can’t actually get hurt by a girl. Guys are, like, strong.” – Joyce Brown

        3. Asten

          I second that. Being kicked in the shins hurt. A lot.

        4. Ikaru

          I was sparing with a friend while in the Army, and he was a kick boxer, I blocked his shin with my shin. His shin won.

        5. Hoax

          Truefacts, I have several distinct divots in my shins because half my life ago I made a habit of trying to jump over things that I couldn’t actually completely clear because I’d try to keep my legs under me for fear of landing on my face so I’d instead end up banging my shins on things like the backs of couches (like the hard-frame kind) and the stage at the high school and run-on sentences.

          I got really good at disguising a limp as a bored amble as a result.

      3. hof1991

        Mike wants them to storm into the dark room. Not how a trusting girlfriend behaves. Hijinks will ensue.

    3. Deanatay

      Joyce missed. She was aiming for his femurs.

  6. Mr. Random

    And now you’re a vice cop of Indiana U

  7. JQuire

    Boxer briefs. Huh.

    1. OkamiKing

      Who actually wears anything other than briefs or boxers?

      1. Leorale

        Jason wears tighty whities. (Which, incidentally, my phone wants to correct to “tightly Shiites”.

        1. Sergei Andropov

          “Tightly Shiites” is a thing of beauty.

        2. Jen Aside

          wow, Tightly Shiites is up there with Skittlefarted

      2. oldFart

        Mormons. Sumo wrestlers. Wearers of boxer briefs.

      3. lightsabermario

        God bless the inventor of boxer briefs.

        1. isitsevenyet

          My husband certainly loves them.

        2. Nono

          Arguably the best underwear option without exposing too much.

      4. Disloyal Subject

        “Who actually wears anything?”
        Fixed that for you.

      5. Gigafreak

        Girls kind of sometimes wear panties instead of boxers and/or briefs

        What we need is to have someone wear panties and briefs and boxer briefs and boxers and long underwear all at once in layers as some kind of demented matryoshka chastity suit

        Just don’t put them on in backwards order or you may be mistaken for a superhero

        1. neeks

          Or the main character of “In Victoria’s Secret Service”

  8. Emperor Kiva

    Nice Joyce!

  9. GDwarf

    The only way to win is to not play his game. Joyce is smarter than she may appear.

    Mind you, Amazi-Girl tackling him didn’t work to well for her…

    1. Kernanator

      Are you saying Mike is functionally identical to thermonuclear war?

      1. Ivan

        only identical to the game.

        Like the computer, he wouldn’t be given the keys or the code (it’s all zeros! Ask McNamara! He’s 98 but still breathing!)

  10. Sylvester Crow

    The best answer to solving problems is brute force, if it doesn’t work, you simply aren’t using enough!

    1. Kelly

      Kind of like XML!

      Sorry, old programmer’s joke…

    2. HMRC4EVR

      The problem is using Brute Force too much would be the amount of money necessary!. I mean, who knows how much maintenance fees are on a cybernetic lion, kangaroo, eagle, dolphin and bear cost???

      Oh, wait. You mean brute force as in the non-Cybernetic, Ecological Defense Force sense of the of the word. Gotcha.

    3. Dorje Sylas

      Maxim #6, a good one. So nice of Joyce to apply #27 so quickly, she may make a decent mercenary yet. #13 would also apply to this situation.

  11. Cthulhu's Intern

    Did Joyce just out-Mike Mike?

    1. Tanarin

      Yes… I believe she did.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        The student has become the master. 😀

        1. MrSirk

          She gets extra points for figuring it out before Dorothy.

        2. kelticat

          And Mike probably got wood.

  12. Leorale

    Man, Joyce is working out lots of aggression today. Maybe she will become just like Amazi-Girl.

    1. Yotomoe

      Insane?

      1. Sageress

        A danger to others and herself?

        1. Leorale

          Yep! Although, come to think of it, those answers already describe her.

      2. Disloyal Subject

        Sanity IS FOR THE WEAK

    2. HMRC4EVR

      Amazi-Girl and Bible Lass! Throwing the Good Book at evil-doers everywhere!

    3. Voiddragon13

      I want to see that as fan art. Heck, I think I will just draw the fan art myself!

      1. Leorale

        Good call. Don’t forget the Amazi-Stool

        1. Amazi-Stool

          Well, it appears i am kind of late to that party!

          Hint: That fanart already exists!

  13. Yotomoe

    Poor Joyce broke her foot after kicking that solid steel.

    1. newllend

      Should have some where softer like the dick. ( I like Mike but I had to say it.)

      1. Arkadi

        Probably not soft any more, right now ;3

  14. liahansen

    She has learned well

    1. newllend

      Her training is nearly complete.

  15. Sporky

    Joyce is absolutely saying that last line in a stereotypical Brooklyn accent. She watched a gangster movie one time by accident when her parents were asleep

    1. Leorale

      Nyeh! Brooklyn rage!

    2. Tenn

      I concur.

    3. LockeZ

      No, she didn’t, but she saw the Goodfeathers section on Animaniacs.

  16. wynne

    Let’s be honest, Mike respects that.

    1. Mouse

      Respect is not the same as lack of consequences.

      1. timemonkey

        This is the consequences of him switching her dry erase marker with a permanent one.

    2. newllend

      So do I for some reason.

  17. Miao

    ….
    Is it bad that now I ship it just a little.
    aLL OF THE SHIPS ALL OF THE TIME

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Which ship are you referring to? Doyce or Joke?

      1. poofdepoof

        I feel the same (if you’re talking about “Joke”)

      2. JessWitt

        JoMik.

      3. Barf Ninjason

        Moyke

        1. Gigafreak

          Joyce = Purity
          Mike = Evil
          Therefore I call this combination “Pure Evil”

        2. Disloyal Subject

          Pure Evil is still pure. Purity is an abomination, and alloys are generally stronger.
          (I like Joke, though; aside from the hilarity, it has a nice ring to it.)

  18. Wack'd

    Of all the people to figure this out, I highly doubted Joyce would be the first.

    Going for the femurs, though? Makes almost too much sense. Everything she knows about inspiring fear she learned from Ruth.

    1. Wack'd

      …oh, whoops, femur’s higher up. And this is why you Google these things before posting.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        I made that mistake too, I always thought they were the lower leg bones.

        1. Opus the Poet

          Your shin is technically your tibia, the fibula is off to one side and behind it (and if I never have to look at another x-ray of my shattered lower leg it will still be too soon)

  19. Seodra

    Well, no way this behavior can damage a relationship…. J. Herbert Christ, Dorothy, what happened to you?

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Joyce happened.

      1. Seodra

        Can we get her to happen somewhere else?

      2. isitsevenyet

        Joyce is irrelevant. Dorothy still had the choice to NOT barge into Walky’s room.

    2. neeks

      Yeah, this is going to be a fun conversation between Walky and Dorothy. They really need to hammer out their respective expectations of their relationship, even if it’s “just for fun.”

  20. Itama

    HOLD ON ONE SECOND THERE!!

    Did Joyce take self defence classes??
    Because that looks an awful lot like a (slightly sloppy) stomp kick. And she seems to be guarding her face competently….

    Suddenly there’s actual merit to the sidekick theory! o.o

    1. John

      She’s got three older brothers.

      1. Itama

        yeah, but she’s also “the princess” (don’t remember when exactly she said that.)
        course’ that doesn’t mean she never got into fights with them, but i can’t see her brothers fighting back in a way that would teach her to guard her face and throw potentially crippling martial arts moves.

        1. Anderhail

          Well, she did manage a pretty competent glassing on Ryan’s face. I don’t think she even cut her hand when it broke, and it was really the wrong style glass for that. She may be a natural.

        2. Jen Aside

          She did, sorry http://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-1/06-yesterday-was-thursday/allergies/

        3. kelticat

          Why can’t the older sibs have taught her to fight. I can see that happening with Jos teaching her how to use the knee, or the stomp, or the claws(as an ex once taught me).

        4. Itama

          i guess that’s possible. still, Joyce seems a little to sheltered to have learned this stuff at home.
          having her sister/brother teach her the basics would some sense, i guess. that said, i’ve drilled a number of beginners in basic kickboxing, and she’s looking like she’s had more than just a half hour of instruction. it takes a lot of repetition to learn to instinctively keep your hands up like that, so either she’s been practising regularly, or she’s a natural.

      2. John

        Or three older siblings, anyway. I failed to connect that factoid with the actual identities of the siblings in question.

    2. Arkadi

      Maybe she’s been looking up more than wieners on the Interwebs! 😀

      1. Itama

        Maybe….
        I’m actually curious if she started looking this stuff up to cope with her fear of Ryan…

        1. neeks

          That stuff she was giddily watching last night was guys getting the snot beat out of them in self-defense videos on YouTube.

          (No it was probably really cartoons)

    3. Roborat

      I am skeptical. Kicking someone in the shin like that will result in broken/sprained/dislocated toes for Joyce. When you kick, you pull your toes up and strike through the ball of your foot.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        Darn, beat me to it.
        She might be doing that and just have short toes, though; hard to tell with socks on.

        1. neeks

          Speaking as someone with congenitally extra short toes it still hurts like hell when you stub them.

          Or, you know, have a pin surgically imbedded in them that your cat bumps into while jumping onto your bed, knocking it loose a week before your doctor removes it. You know, hypothetically.

      2. Itama

        i was kind of assuming the animation was off, more than technique. i mean she got everything perfect but the angle of her toes. hard to think of that as a coincidence.

  21. newllend

    Joyce you deserve +1 in respect.

  22. Flimsyfishy

    Unexpected boner from Mike in 3…2…1…

    1. newllend

      I ship it.

  23. Keroshino

    Well, its a start…now aim higher Joyce!!!

    1. Deanatay

      Go for the femurs!

  24. Swerve

    Hello, and welcome to “Swerve’s”! Been a while since we’ve seen you. What can I getcha? Engex? Weak Energon Spritzer? How about this new drink Nautica showed me how to make? She calls it “Fetish Fuel”.

    Good choice. So it seems Joyce is once again employing violence. Though if Mike’s reaction to being interrogated by Ultra-Girl is any indication, Mike might be a masochist.

    Your drink is almost ready. Don’t worry! The way Dorothy is worried about getting in trouble almost reminds me of Ultra Magnus. You see back on Hedonia, Magnus… um, actually I think your drink is uh, er, ready. Here you go, and stick around for tonight’s entertainment: knocking down a pinata of Megatron.

  25. Saintslayer

    Joyce: “Ripoff artist!” *kick*
    Mike: “OW MY SHIN”

    1. Regalli

      … Thank you for reminding me of Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends.

      And dammit, now I want to watch that entire series and they only have the first season on Netflix!

  26. Regalli

    That is the cutest kick in the shins I have ever seen.

  27. zmm

    JOYCE IS MASTERING COLLEGE!

  28. someguywithakatana

    One day you’re looking at penises on the internet and the next, you’re committing assault, and breaking and entering.

    Is college corrupting your youth? More at eleven.

    1. John

      Joyce started with the assault.

      The way she’s going, it appears that assault and battery is a gateway crime that leads to vandalism, looking at porn, and maybe someday to saying the ‘F’ word.

      1. Gigafreak

        So along with Walky (who first goes to college, then gets a girlfriend, and then eventually hopefully learns to tie his own shoes), Joyce is growing up in backwards order.

  29. CapedLuigisYoshi

    …Okay, it’s funny seeing Mike failing like this.

    1. hof1991

      If you think Mike is failing, you have underestimated him. He wants an entry with maximum fuss and noise, followed by an accusation from Dorothy. Letting them in quietly would have been a failure.

  30. Yotomoe

    She’s not talking to you Dorothy. She wants the Door to search the joint.

    1. Barf Ninjason

      I could see Joyce getting along in London Below

  31. Nena

    Good for Joyce for kicking that asshole.

    1. Arkadi

      Actually, it’s a leg.

      1. Koms

        Ahahahahaha..+1 internet

  32. JessWitt

    Any BAMF valedictorians in the comment board ta-nite?

    1. Kit

      Well, I’m not BAMF, but I’m a valedictorian! 🙂

  33. chris73

    Unless Joyces toes are made of iron or she has steel capped socks she’d have at least one broken toe

    1. Opus the Poet

      She could be using the outside edge of her foot, that hurts like hell on a shin.

    2. Itama

      no. believe it or not, the kick joyce just used looks a lot like a classic stomp kick. the animation is a bit wonky, but if she did it right, mike could be a lot worse off. hell, if she aimed better, she could have broken his knee.

      1. chris73

        A stomp kick leading with the toes?

        1. Itama

          like i said. wonky animation.
          look at the movement lines, though. if she were swinging her foot UP she would have little power and be using her toes (which is admittedly what i’d expect of joyce) but she’s not. she’s lifted her foot and is bringing it DOWN. she cant have hit with her toes like that, because they would skid right off, and mike wouldn’t be hurt.

        2. chris73

          Do you mean like an axe kick? To me it looks like a simple kick to the shin which, given Joyces background, seems like something she’d be familiar with

          Mind you she did glass someone so anythings possible I guess

        3. Itama

          maybe. my experience with axe kicks is that they utilize the back if the heel in ways that wouldn’t really work here, but that move rarely ever came up in my training, so i don’t really know for certain.

    3. Roborat

      Yup, I was taught in karate to pull the toes up, and strike through the ball of the foot. Broken toes for sure that way, particularly when striking the shin.

  34. Mkvenner

    You know this reminds me of the time Joyce smash a glass in Ryan’s face just before Sarah broke his ribcage. 🙂

    1. Malchus

      … is that a Gaunt’s Ghost screenname I spy?

      1. Mkvenner

        Got it in one.

        1. Malta

          Best, Scottish Ninja with a Flamer.

  35. Malchus

    Yes, Dorothy, and Joyce is clearly a Vale-kick-dorian.

    1. Gigafreak

      Billie, the source of the trouble, has already proven herself as a vale-kick-door-in.

  36. Tom Speelman

    Now I want an AU where Dorothy and Joyce are cops. That sounds amazing.

    1. RAZ

      you my man, just give me an idea for an DOA AU fanfic.

      1. Gigafreak

        Some teams play good-cop-and-bad-cop.

        These two play good-cop-and-insufferable-cop.

  37. motorfirebox

    Mike out-Miked by Joyce. The shame of this will burn him forever.

    1. Arkadi

      Mike doesn’t resort to physical violence that easily.

      1. Pinja

        Did you forget Joyce’s date with Joe?

        1. Arkadi

          I might have o_O Chapter?

        2. Gigafreak

          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-1/03-men-are-from-beck-women-are-from-clark/bliss/
          Joyce and Mike punched the shit out of Joe together. More to the point, if you go into the preceding pages, you’ll see Mike taking any possible excuse to punch him more.

        3. Disloyal Subject

          That was different. He was getting paid, and it was someone else doing the resorting. By carrying out their will, he was exerting greater assholitude (and possibly catalyzing Joyce’s epiphany that it’s not okay to punch people in the face). It’s when carrying out a proper scheme of his own like this that he doesn’t bother with violence.

    2. Morty

      Actually, I’d say that since Mike wasn’t expecting this, he probably respects Joyce more now. He may also be slightly turned on, not completely sure

      1. Ikaru

        That was what I was thinking. The turned on bit. XD He is something of a masochist.

        1. Dorje Sylas

          I bet he tangos to Tom Lehrer.

  38. TimeLoss

    All I can imagine is all the talking heads commentary about this “incident” in 25 years during Dorothy’s presendential campaign. I think the internet has made me jaded.

  39. MacBone

    Man, this is some serious invasion of privacy right here. I wonder what Walky’s reaction is going to be when he finds out about this.

    1. Ancestral Hamster

      A similar incident caused Martin and Dora to break up in Questionable Content.

  40. Kugai

    Sometimes. it takes a kick to the shins to get to the truth.

    1. March

      With Mike, it’s in the Top Five.

  41. foolio

    I bet the next one will start with Mike holding Joyce in a headlock.

  42. Doom Shepherd

    That’s an important lesson for a future President to learn.

  43. MissQuinn

    Joyce is DEFINITELY somebody who grew up with a gaggle of older brothers. I can say from personal experience that a well-placed kick to the shins does indeed topple much larger foes. (I would have kicked higher but I’m like 5’2 and all of my brothers are freakishly tall.)

  44. JA

    The whiteboard ding-dong bandit has super strength

  45. Idon'tcarenomore

    My guess, Yeah her brothers taught her well.
    Add to that Mike’s total lack of fear of her
    = successful sneak attack

    Doesn’t make up for goading Dorothy about Walky being with Billy all night, but it is amusing.

    1. Killjoy

      Goading?

      Huh?

  46. Rabid Rabbit

    Hmm. What’s the second point of interest? Obviously, Billie waking up in Walky’s bed the other day is one. But what else?

    That being said, it is perfectly clear that Mike’s going to start stalking Joyce now in the hopes of more.

    1. Pinja

      Billie’s two huge tits

      1. WaytoomanyUIDs

        She’s an aviculturalist?

        1. tinfoil theory

          And an apiarist.

    2. Leorale

      He’s referring to Billie’s bosom. It helps him deserve that shin-kick.

    3. hof1991

      OK, “two massive points” was the funniest line in this comic for weeks. And it probably pissed off Dorothy whose points of interest are more modest. Bless you Willis. Made my day. Moar Mike pls.

  47. Marek

    “two massive points of interest” 🙂

  48. Pinja

    Aaaaaaaaaaah, finally Mike is treated as he deserves.

    I love this comic.

    1. Killjoy

      Mike earns his abuse. Something is seriously wrong in that skull.

  49. Em

    Joyce WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU. I mean, yeah, haha Mike got kicked woo but she’s forcefully entering his room by violent means. I’m totally gonna be the wet blanket and say that this is so many types of not okay.

    But this is a comic. Probably shouldn’t take it so seriously.

    (Also saw some people wondering. The points of interest are: Bille and Walky literally sleeping together, and Walky sending her a lot of texts. Or at least those are what I would guess the points of interest are)

    1. AtomsOrSystems

      Or Billie’s breasts. Maybe my mind is in the gutter, but I thought he was trying to make a joke about Billie’s chest.

      1. Kamino Neko

        Definitely a boob joke. Coming right after ‘handful’ is obviously not a coincidence.

        1. John

          He’s selling Billie short there. I’m pretty sure she’s got more than a double handful.

      2. Robin

        Aw man, I didn’t even notice that!

    2. StrawGirl

      I agree!

      It also would have been much easier to pretend that Walky was going to be in trouble, because Mike would have let them in right away if he thought crap was about to go down.

  50. That Damn Rat

    I don’t know about that alt text, incapacitating Mike could make great contributions to the overall peace and harmony of the world.

    1. tinfoil theory

      That is not what the Nobel Peace Prize is given for.
      It is meant as a reminder that you should avoid using violence.

  51. Ghola

    Joyce no! That’s how Mikes Flirt! Bad Joyce!

  52. Crumplepunch

    Joyce is wise in the ways of Mike.

  53. Kevin

    WILLIS ALERT MALWARE IN AD

    Getting attacked by a script from pixel.mathtag.com when visiting DoA. I can’t say for sure that it’s malware but it’s trying to execute itself improperly.

    1. Cybersnark

      WILLIS ALERT WOO WOO WOO WOO

  54. lightsabermario

    Given the circumstances, she’s probably more likely to win the peace prize now.

  55. gkz

    There’s hope for you yet, Joyce.

  56. Nikie

    Why am I suddenly shipping Mike and Joyce?

  57. Varius

    She kicked him in the dick. Mike IS a dick. Therefore, anywhere she kicks him is “in the dick.”

    1. anonymous

      Plot twist: Mike is a eunuch.

      1. RandomRedMage

        So he is a dick because he lacks a dick? no… that’s not right Eunuch just means he lacks balls…

        1. Ruck Bogers

          Yesh, fine.
          Plot twist: Mike is a nullo.

  58. Boomwolf

    wow Joyce taking the violent way out… AWESOME!

    1. Leorale

      Technically, she’s taking the violent way in.

  59. Alexx

    I dunno why that reminds me of a fighting game.

    “STOP SPAMMING THE LOW KICKS!”

    “It’s a legitimate move in the game!”

    “WELL DO SOMETHING ELSE!!”

    1. John

      “But I’m playing Chun Li!”

      1. Jen Aside

        or Divekick

  60. DT

    “Dammit, Joyce, I’m a valedictorian, not a common ruffian!”

  61. Beem0b0t

    She figured out Mike, that’s it. The story’s over. Pack it up folks.

  62. Tenn

    Mike suddenly wishes he was wearing a jockstrap.

    1. Nightsbridge

      Mike is totally turned on right now.

  63. hof1991

    I like to read the bold words in a Dune style Bene Gesserrit Voice. Mike: Trouble. Handful. Points of Interest. He is goading them into the foolish thing they are about to do.

  64. Jesse

    I approve of Mike being kicked.

  65. Black

    Really, the only reason that Mike is such an asshole is because he hasn’t had anyone give him physical retribution for his verbal abuse.

    Maybe he’ll start to think twice about being such a fucktard to other people if a good little Christian would resort to violence.

    1. The Phantom's Belch

      I guess Joyce remembered that when answering “What would Jesus do?”, chasing people with a whip and flipping tables aren’t out of the question. 🙂

      And anyways, I’d say that while Joyce may not get the Nobel Peace prize, she’s got a future with the U.N. To quote Clue:

      Wadsworth: How would your colleagues at the U.N. respond knowing that you were implicated in not one but six murders?
      Professor Plum: You don’t know what kind of people they have at the U.N. I might go up in their estimation.

    2. Disloyal Subject

      You really don’t get Mike, do you? That applies for the common asshole, be they morons like me who don’t realize they were doing anything wrong until someone snaps them out of it or cowards who can be cowed, but Mike is on a whole ‘nother level. And quite likely is a masochist.

    3. John

      The other universe’s Mike on more than one occasion provoked others into beating the shit out of him just to make them feel bad about doing it.

      1. Black

        I don’t understand how someone could feel bad about beating the shit out of a complete asshole, but then again I’m a hateful bastard, so… *shrugs*

  66. John

    Mike x Joyce needs to happen.

    1. G4ige

      ^

  67. acher4

    That last panel is awesome. From The ‘Dor’, to the accent, and the phycial movements. Hehehehee

  68. brumagem

    Joyce knows how to put up her dukes…who knew?

    1. The Phantom's Belch

      Well, how many older brothers does she have? You have that many, you learn to fight.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        Three, according to the wiki (since I couldn’t find the page from Just Hanging Out With My Family that detailed their locations at the time)

        1. Gigafreak

          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/04-just-hangin-out-with-my-family/undeclared/
          The Brown kids are Jonathan, Joshua (Jocelyn), Jordan, and Joyce herself.

          Wait, do we count Joshua as a brother or Jocelyn as a sister.

          Hmm. Girls can pick on younger siblings too. (Remember, other-universe Walky learned to fight from Billie!) So the brother/sister terminology is irrelevant. The point is that Joyce had three older siblings picking on her.

        2. clodia

          I wish there was a way to upvote your comment.

  69. Mitch

    Haha, checkmate Mike!

  70. notme

    A kick to the shin works much better when you’re actually wearing shoes. If you’re just in socks, it’s barely an inconvenience.

    1. Arkadi

      Now you mention it… that actually should have hurt Joyce as much as it hurt Mike.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        The trick is to pull your toes back out of the way and strike with the ball of your foot.
        I wouldn’t be surprised if Joyce knows that and/or considers it common knowledge. Or if she’s just sufficiently hateful of Mike to feel no pain.

        1. Dreamcastguy

          This person knows what’s up.

          A proper front kick with bare feet can really hurt someone as long as you remember to curl those toes.

  71. Johnny Z

    What a jerk, specially considering her recent vandalism spree. Does she think Mike is concealing some sort of illicit orgy that she’s so eager to see?

    I hope someone eventually calls her on how she acts.

    1. Gigafreak

      So who would call Joyce out on this kind of thing?
      Mike is right there, but she probably wouldn’t listen to him.
      Sarah would do it, and Joyce would probably accept it from her, but Sarah doesn’t know Joyce was the Whiteboard Dingdong Bandit yet.
      Mary would love to find a reason to be judgmental, and might spontaneously point the dingdong finger at Joyce without actually being informed that it really was her, but lacks credibility specifically because of this attitude.

      1. Johnny Z

        Ideally Mike will get her back, if not with an immediate reveal (which probably won’t have much of an effect with Walky and Dorothy) or a more long drawn out campaign of torment.

        1. Gigafreak

          …And how many people like that have ever seen the error of their ways after an escalating war of harassment? That’s historically only made them believe they’re more right.

        2. Lel

          Remember, if it’s happening, its because Mike wants it to happen.
          Perhaps his plan was to coerce Joyce into even greater displays of violence all along.

    2. Sir Robin

      Ans the reason Dorothy is concerned is because of Joyce blurting out certain information

  72. Dreamcastguy

    Get those toes curled up if you are going to front kick someone.

    No use breaking your own toes. Use the ball of your foot.

  73. redneck01

    Looks like a total victory for Mike, in that he successfully manipulated them both into doing bad things that will have bad consequences for them.

    He knows that walky and billie are in bed together fully clothed, but has planted the undisprovable idea that walky’s hands are inside billie’s clothes.

    Drama ensues from all three girls bad behavior, of which behavior the boys are entirely innocent.

  74. whatintheliteralfuck

    Ah Joyce, ever the true Christian, resorting to violence when you don’t get a good answer the first time.

    1. Marc in MN

      It’s almost like Christians are human. Wow…what a revelation. =P

  75. GenericGuestName

    I have to say I am happy to see that Joyce keeps a tight guard up even when shes just kicking someone’s shin. Bothers the crap out of me when I see someone throw a kick and have their arms fling around wildly, or worse shoot down to their waist as if it helps. Then again having something ingrained into you like keeping a tight guard it’s no wonder that’s what I notice.

  76. halcyon1234

    Yeah, what the hell, Joyce? Don’t you know that being Valedictorian means you get first dibs on laying down beatings?

  77. Vangeln

    Goddammit, Malaya! …Er I mean Joyce.

  78. Kiggy

    OK I’m late, but, that last panel was so BADASS!

  79. Tess

    I find the progression of Joyce’s character intriguing 🙂 First-comic (Dumbing of Age) Joyce probably wouldn’t have kicked anyone in the shins.

  80. Red5

    That is exactly how you should deal with Mike. Bonus points to Joyce.

  81. DarkoNeko

    I’m so glad it was below the knee.

  82. Ninjamaid

    Wow, reading back on this… I’m totally shipping Mike/Joyce.

Leave a Reply to G4ige Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

*

*

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.