Man-dangle
Posted on May 4, 2014 by David M Willis

228 thoughts on “Man-dangle”

  1. Opus the Poet

    (another) horrifying experience coming up.

    1. Opus the Poet

      But this does verify she knows what a “strap-on” is now.

      1. gangler

        She seems to have a basic understanding of its physical properties, though it wouldn’t surprise me to find she saw a picture and cut the search short rather than reading up on its function.

        Though maybe I’m not giving her enough credit, and the picture was just self-explanatory.

        1. Cody B

          It would amaze me if one could google strap on without seeing one in action. In my experience, google’s strongest filters do not filter all that much.

        2. vlademir1

          If she did an image search yeah she likely saw use, actual or implicit use being debatable. If she did a video search she might have seen use, but that’s a toss up. A straight web search would plausibly have just landed her on Wikipedia.

        3. paradoxius

          Safe search.

        4. Wyvern

          Not only is there a Wikipedia page, there’s a disambiguation page to make sure you get the strap-on you want! Why, why, did I have to check?

        5. DarkVeghetta

          It is a glorious time we live in.

      2. Shadow12000

        The question is…did she get so embarrassed she immediately closed the browser? Or look more? Or even…order one?

    2. Jen Aside

      But she at least found the SPARKLY ones!

      1. Jim

        That’s what happens when you search for something NSFW with safe-search on, you end up with a weird enough example of the whatever that the filters aren’t quite able to auto-flag it.

        I doubt it occurred to Joyce to flip that to off.

    3. Tunaro

      The Internet: Scarring your brain since the first time you ever shut off Safe Search!

      1. Aizat

        You also forgot: The Internet, the gateway to a dead childhood.

    4. That Damn Rat

      Yeah, but this time the horror is Dorothy’s.

  2. Plasma Mongoose

    So she finally found out what a straop-on is… YAY! 😀

    1. LiaHansen

      Fun fact, if you google what a “straop-on” is, you find not some kind of sparkly rubber man dangle on a belt, but three pictures of cameras with floral-patterned straps, two profile pictures, some asian themed charms of some kind, four math looking things, and a minivan.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        GIS got me a whole lot of demotivators.

        1. Marisa Mockery

          Awww May! Cute!

      2. luxlucis

        Not on MY google search.

      3. Opus the Poet

        I got buckets of lesbian porn when I Googled “straop-on”. Apparently it is a common typo. If you’ll excuse me I’ll be in my bunk…

        1. KingMabel

          The day when multiple people googled a misspelled “strap-on”
          on purpose

      4. Chris

        Fun fact: Google’s search results themselves are a form of rose-colored glasses. Google tracks your previous searches, and possibly surfing history via its analytics & ad services used on most web sites, then tailors your search results to what it thinks will match your interests.

        1. miyto

          Hence why you have to sign-off of google and disable cookies, if you want a not-made-to-order search.
          Then you get the average of everybody’s rose-colored glasses!

          …

          …

          As a whole, humanity is messed up.

      5. Sambo

        And, since you posted that, you also get pictures of Walky, Dorothy, and Mike! XD

  3. otusasio451

    Next thing you know, Joyce’ll become a fan of Edith Piaf. Then of Inception.

    1. Rabid Rabbit

      I must admit, despite my ability to sing probably fifty Piaf songs on hearing no more than their titles, that I don’t get it. But then my knowledge of Inception is inexistent.

      1. Kelli

        Alors, je sens en moi, mon coeur qui bat…

      2. otusasio451

        Edith Piaf music is a major motif in Inception, in more ways than one.

  4. Tunaro

    Who the bloody Hell Bedazzles a strap-on? Why?

    1. Aizat

      There are sick people in this world?

    2. Geminia999

      Sadists? Plus, sparkles come in impossible to remove variety as well.

      1. Roborat

        If you are going to bedazzle a strap-on, I hope to hell that you use the impossible to remove sparklies.

    3. Jen Aside

      Must be a vampire dongle.

      1. Aizat

        For the last time, Vampires do not sparkle!

        1. JustCheetoDust

          They do if they rock the strap-on.

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          I googled twilight themed sparkly strap-on and I got MLP stuff instead.

        3. JustCheetoDust

          I want to say that’s surprising, but I would just be lying.

        4. nothri

          It really pisses me off that I’m just jaded enough not to be completely surprised and appalled by this news.

        5. TachyonCode

          Good thing there’s no ponies with “rubber” in their name, I guess.

          … there aren’t, right?

        6. Lanval

          This made me imagine one called Sparkle-Glue and other various gory fates for horses. I realized after a couple seconds that Rubber is not one of those.

        7. Deanatay

          There are now, dammit! Look what you’ve done!!

        8. Stephanie

          You comment is what you get when you google it now — or at least when I do. 😉

        9. Kryss LaBryn

          Having just watched several MLP episodes in a row with my kids, this comment was ridiculously hilarious. Also I can see exactly why you got MLP. XD

          Also I need to go make sure safe search is on on the kids’ computers…

    4. Opus the Poet

      I have seen transparent ones with metalflake in the resin.

    5. Opus the Poet

      To make it priiiiteee!!!

    6. Bill

      Why ask who bedazzles a strap-on?  That’s already covered under Rule 34.

  5. Geminia999

    So she rented them, when three or four, and hasn’t watched it in a few years, and brought then to college with her? I guess she’s a collector?

    1. Sir Robin

      Maybe they are REALLY over due

      1. Aizat

        Thank goodness that the video store was closed….right?

    2. Jordan

      I guess that she likes to have all of her childhood things around her. I mean, she brought all of her stuffed animals with her, so why not her favorite DVDs?

    3. Lou

      I’d bet that she bought it just recently just to show her.

      1. Sean

        My brother got a set of GI Joe cartoons for Christmas a couple years ago.
        I watched one a few days later.

        Oh, man. Talk about 2D characterization and plot.

        It’s like Mattel purposely tried to repel adults so they could sell the stuff to kids without parents reacting until it was too late.

    4. astraea

      She probably finds them comforting. I brought my copy of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone to college with me.

      1. Aizat

        Heck, I brought my copy of Mazinkaizer to college.

      2. Roborat

        Plus the later volumes in the series also make handy weapons.

    5. Maveric1984

      I have a bunch of movies I’ve bought and haven’t watched yet. When they’re available at the grocery store for like 5 bucks, it’s hard to resist. Then you just kinda forget you have them.

      1. Bill

        I can relate.  I used to work for a company that packages a lot of the stuff you find in the 2/$10 bin at Wally-World, and they let us take some of it home.  I haven’t worked there in over five years, and there’s a lot of this stuff I still haven’t looked at.

    6. cesium133

      Wait, I’m supposed to return videos after renting them? Gosh darn it, they’re gonna be so cheesed at me.

  6. Sir Robin

    She did it off-panel?

    Damn you Willis!!!

    1. Doctor_Who

      That could have resulted in the best “Joyce Reaction Face” ever. We are so deprived.

      (First time I typed that it came out “We are so depraved”. Not what I meant to say, but still an accurate statement)

      1. Wizard

        It’s on account of we’re deprived that we’re depraved!

        1. Questionor

          So take us to a headshrinker.

        2. Doctor_Who

          It’s just a social disease!

        3. brionl

          Just ask Officer Krupke
          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pq28qCklEHc

        4. Leorale

          As a social worker in training, I can tell you that this song still totally works!

        5. Opus the Poet

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TYgOlqinH7A

          Sorry that’s the best I can do.

        6. Aizat

          Well, there’s these guys: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yVR7jFDASck
          I don’t know if they can help though.

  7. Kernanator

    Time to see how thoroughly the nostalgia goggles will be ripped off.

    1. Speedball

      This will either be a poor letdown or a spectacular letdown… I’m hoping for “spectacular.”

      Willis, how the hell do you make every single page of this comic a cliffhanger?

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      When I was really young, I thought shows like Mr Magoo were amusing, nowadays they’re just bleugh!

      1. Aizat

        I never did find the appeal of Mr. Magoo. It’s fun for like one short…but that’s just it.

        1. Swerve

          Mr. Magoo? That guy’s great! He sounds just like Tracks! 😉

        2. Aizat

          Yeah…but Tracks is full of himself…kinda like Sunstreaker.

      2. nothri

        Used to think ThunderCats and He-Man were awesome and not full of homoerotic symbolism.

        1. caesaria82

          Are you saying homoerotic symbolism is not awesome? Because it’s totally awesome 😉

        2. nothri

          I’ll stick with my pervy realization that Cheetara was technically naked in the first episode, thank you very much.

        3. John

          That episode was responsible for an entire generation of furries.

        4. Lanval

          I love how the avatars from after Caesaria’s comment just work for what they are saying. It’s pretty magical.

        5. Maveric1984

          Thunder cats is still awesome.

          He-Man still sucks though, which is disappointing.

        6. Kelly

          He-Man is silly, but I will not hear anything against Thundercats!

        7. Marisa Mockery

          Wait, Thundercats? What?

          Oh, shit. YOU JUST RUINED EVERYTHING. I USED TO PRETEND MY UMBRELLA WAS THAT SWORD WHEN I WAS A KID AND YOU RUINED IT.

          Still a fun show. :p

        8. nothri

          Heh. “Whenever my sword of omens grows too long, I go looking for some Thundercats Hos.”

          I’m sorry.

  8. JustCheetoDust

    Time to ask the arts and crafts store for strap-on glitter!

    1. Jen Aside

      I’m sure the glitter can just glue on…?

      1. JustCheetoDust

        The fun is in seeing how long it takes for employees to get to that answer, because it probably won’t be the first one.

  9. GoldStarz

    I’m trying to think of what innuendo you could make out of “rose-colored glasses” but I’m coming up empty. Any ideas?

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Sorry but I got nothing either.

    2. JustCheetoDust

      …some combination of “glass bottom boat” and a gardening fetish?

    3. Stephen Bierce

      Beer Goggles, but using a fruit-based beverage rather than a grain-bsed one.

      1. Andrusi

        Wine goggles?

      2. Opus the Poet

        Nope, that’s rose’ colored glasses, completely different pronunciation.

        1. Bill

          +2, Opus.

    4. nothri

      I would go with something about looking at flowers unfold, since flower is sometimes used as a metaphor for lady parts and glasses help you see things. Kinda reaching though. Fortunately, I’m never one to balk at going the long way around to make an awful comment or really dumb joke.

      1. E.R.

        She might not have heard of rose colored classes, but how about some lily colored lenses.

    5. nothri

      Of course, I personally can’t hear the phrase “Rose Colored Glasses” without immediately thinking of highly symbolic lesbians.

      Goddamn Utena, man. Goddamn it.

      1. Opus the Poet

        +1 for Utena! And the Rose Princess…

        1. nothri

          It was a good show, but man is it a mind trip. Especially the movie. Holy crap, the movie.

    6. TCS

      Is it like a Rule 34 version of rose-tinted glasses? Or maybe glasses that give you the flashback in the song?

      (I’ve never heard them called rose-colored, only rose-tinted. Tongue in cheek. I think most commenters here get that, though.)

      1. Stephen Bierce

        Of course, the original Lolita was very famous for her eyewear.

    7. AgentKeen

      I came up with one, but it’s too ‘blegh’ in my mind for repeating and putting on the internet.

      1. Tenn

        Oh, that one.

  10. MrSirk

    Well at least now she knows what one is…I think?

  11. xain

    Bravo Willis Bravo

  12. Aizat

    By the way, who was it that suggests that Joyce look up what’s a strap-on?

    1. Opus the Poet

      Everybody.

    2. JustCheetoDust

      Mike was the most recent, assuming he wasn’t the only one.

      1. NA

        herself most recently

  13. burntnorris

    She did the thing.

    1. Lou

      She sure did.

    2. nothri

      ……
      ……
      …….
      Benjamin Grimm or the shape shifting horror in Antarctica?

      Either way…eww.

      1. Cybersnark

        Everybody always forgets the disembodied hand.

      2. AgentKeen

        Hey, don’t go Eww at Ben Grimm.

        Even he needs to get his rocks off.

    3. Opus the Poet

      She did the thing about the thing and now she’s seen things she can’t unsee. not even the strongest of brain bleach will wipe that image from her mind…

      1. lejwocky

        I bet Kurt Russel could help somehow

  14. Doctor_Who

    Everyone has that thing they used to watch as a kid that they thought was awesome, but then they see it as an adult and wonder why the fuck they aren’t MORE screwed up.

    Mine was The Elm-Chanted Forest. Thought this shit was Disney quality when I was six, now I realize it is Drugs: The Movie.

    1. Aizat

      Mine was Animals of Farthing Woods.

      1. madock345

        Mine was a Troll in Central Park.

        1. Aizat

          That one? Damn, I feel sorry for you.

        2. Maveric1984

          He-Man was one of my favorite cartoons as a kid. It did not age well.

          Luckily, my other fave cartoon was The Real Ghostbusters, and the DVD box set I got is awesome.

        3. Doctor_Who

          Real Ghostbusters is one of the few that’s still good.

        4. Maveric1984

          The other one (coincidentally, also made by the studio that did He-Man), while it had a cool theme song, and a psychedelic “transformation sequence” that was kinda awesome, sucked almost as bad as He-Man, and was obviously trying to cash in on the success of the Ghostbusters movie.

        5. Kelly

          Oddly, even though it was cashing in on the 1984 movie, it was based on a much older live-action comedy series.

    2. John

      I watched the Star Wars Holiday Special on TV the one and only time it aired.

      1. Carlos

        How are you still alive?!?!

        1. Doctor_Who

          Seriously, I thought Lucas had all the witnesses hunted down and shot!

        2. JustCheetoDust

          Huh, I thought the only time something like that happened was when Nintendo tried to rid the world of the “Super Hornio Bros.” porn parody.

        3. Heavensrun

          Ha ha! Implying that Lucas gave a rats ass what anyone but himself thinks of Star Wars!

          You’re funny.

      2. Sean

        Oh, BTW. May the Fourth be with you today.

    3. timemonkey

      I don’t. Thanks to my mom’s uber protectiveness over what I watched as a child. I may not have been able to watch the same things the others kids were watching but what I did watch was generally high quality.

    4. Barf Ninjason

      I freaking loved the first Teenage Mutant Ninjas Turtles cartoon, which I think was like mandatory for a wee Yankee lad in the 80’s, but I digress — anyway, the night I graduated high school I grew up a little bit, mainly because at the salutatorian’s after-party we watched TMNT episodes and I realized: they’re freaking terrible. Almost no character development, ever, a supposedly badass journalist who actually alternates between a nagging mother figure and a damsel in distress, and for the love of the gods, every time they go outside, in NEW YORK CITY, there’s never anyone else around on the streets. Also grew up a bit more the next day because we all woke up in the living room in the morning and the salutatorian farted and said, “Sorry, my body just has to do that when I wake up” and I’d never actually seen/heard a girl fart before.

      1. brionl

        I think the latest TMNT is pretty good. They still have the same “empty NYC” problem. They’ve poked gentle fun at the first series a couple of times.

        1. Roborat

          I got to see all the original TMNT voice actors at Calgary comic-con. It was awesome. At the end Rob Paulson got the whole audience singing the theme song.

    5. Mkvenner

      Wine was Roughnecks: Starship Troopers Chronicles and Gundam Wing.

      1. Roborat

        Blackstar.

    6. spriteless

      OMG I barely remember that one. You have found a piece of my childhood.

      The Little Mermaid animated series is kind of dumb, but TMNT was right after it.

    7. Whittier

      Silverhawks for me. Poor animation quality, scripts dashed off in about fifteen minutes. But when I was 12, it was the coolest thing ever.

    8. Deanatay

      Mine was The Music Machine. Agapeland Ho!

    9. GreatContagion

      The string of replies to your comment invigorated my old urge to go find a cartoon I watched as a kid. Turns out most people never find this show because of the stupid way the title is spelled.

      “Dragon Flyz” … Time to youtube episodes and probably become really disillusioned with how good it was, then go watch Gargoyles to reinstill my love of nostalgic cartoons of this era.

      1. GreatContagion

        This isn’t actually terrible, so far. I do think it’s hilarious how all of these old cartoons feature consistently really tall, ultra-burly men with perfect facial hair and really slim, curvy women always ~1′ shorter than all the men, constantly wearing lipstick.

        Is there an old cartoon that regularly showed people with average builds? It’s common nowadays (stuff like the Avatar series, both, have pretty regular looking, varied casts) but I’m struggling to come up with an old one that did, without just using scrawny or obese models for villainous types.

        1. StClair

          The reason is simple:
          That’s how they molded action figures back in those days, and all of those cartoons were based on/made to sell action figures.

      2. Aizat

        Try Dragon Flyz, Sky Dancers and the American Street Fighter cartoon..what was I thinking…and that Australian Ultraman show. Man, my childhood ain’t that great, looking back. Well, at least I did enjoy Lost Universe and Dragon Ball. Too bad, I never got to finish Lost Universe…or Slayers for that matter.

        1. Opus the Poet

          If you’re thinking about the series “Slayers” that had the main character Lina Inverse, you can get the box set of the English dub from Funimation. I haven’t checked to see how many discs are in the set or how much it costs I just remember seeing the ad for it a while back.

    10. brionl

      Rocky & Bullwinkle, George of the Jungle, Tom Slick, Super Chicken. Those old Jay Ward cartoons are still great.
      Speed Racer, not so much. After I saw the Speed Racer movie (which I didn’t hate), I tracked down some of the old cartoons, and “Oh, The Humanity!” I’ve watched the new Speed Racer cartoons a couple of times, and it’s even worse!

  15. Pyr05

    I don’t want to know what Joyce thinks rose coloured glasses would find with a Google search. The mind… it wanders now. Thanks Willis.

    1. Aizat

      All I can think of the term “rose coloured glasses” was that one episode of Dave the Barbarian.

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      I googled them and it’s pretty much safe for work.

      1. JustCheetoDust

        Second that.

        Now, “Alabama Hot Pocket,” that should not be Googled.

        1. arank11

          Aaaaand now I must Google that

          *Five minutes later*

          Life is not worth living. All I see is darkness. I am the abyss

        2. JustCheetoDust

          Reverse psychology strikes again!

        3. Plasma Mongoose

          I sum it up for anyone who hasn’t google imaged searched “Alabama Hot Pocket”:

          Shitting into a vagina… YEEK!

        4. JustCheetoDust

          On that note, I still don’t know what exactly a “Rusty Venture” is.

        5. Opus the Poet

          The father in the Venture Brothers series…

        6. JustCheetoDust

          I take it you never saw the season 4 finale? (the “prom” episode)

        7. JustCheetoDust

          Anyways, Shore Leave, the Alchemist, Colonel Gentleman, Watch and Ward, Brock and Trianna Orpheus all take turns explaining what they thought the “Rusty Venture” sex act was.

          Uncensored version of the scene:
          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sn4aLokf-t8

        8. Opus the Poet

          I was working late night Saturdays when Season 4 was showing…

        9. JustCheetoDust

          The clips above cover the whole conversation without spoiling much of anything in the season finale.

        10. Lanval

          Why did you do this. I very deliberately didn’t look it up. You awful person, you.

        11. Plasma Mongoose

          Still better than if you GISed it.

      2. Pyr05

        Plasma, I meant after the ‘strapon’ incident for Joyce, what she THINKS Googling ‘rose coloured glasses’ would get her.

  16. Mr. Random

    Then, say no.

  17. JohnnyPanic

    So she knows what it IS, but does she know what it’s FOR? Recall that Joyce’s conceptualization of intercourse involves the rubbing of a disturbingly non-phallic* pseudo-rolling-pin “thing” onto a woman’s bare stomach. I sincerely hope that her search led her to something from Tasteful Treasures, instead of…elsewhere. (That said, if strap-on-enabled activities WERE her first foray into nude interrelations, her first heterosexual boyfriend is in for an interesting night.)

    *Google confirms that this is the first use of the phrase “disturbingly non-phallic.”

    1. Barf Ninjason

      That was her *dream*, not a conscious conceptualization. I figure she knows what intercourse is, but that her conditioning repressed the sexual urges down into a PG-13ish anatomically incorrect version in her dream.

      1. JohnnyPanic

        I did consider the dream aspect, and for literally any other character, I’d agree with you. But can you honestly say you’d be surprised to find out that Joyce can’t mentally connect Tab A with Slot B?

        1. Neonix

          I actually remember having a dream sorta like that after I already knew what intercourse was. The mind can be weird.

  18. Ed Rhodes

    I used to watch “The Magic Land of Alakazam” (Joyce would have hated it, it shows “magic” in a positive light.) Mark Wilson actually has a website where he sells boxed sets of the show… I’m afraid of scarring my 9 year old self if I watch it and realize how much it sucked!

  19. Edster

    I am Serious. I want a kickstarter for a DoA TV show. I would voice act walky.

    1. Opus the Poet

      Hmm, lessee, I would do… Leslie Bean and Blaine O’Malley. What? I do women’s voices… And I have a working prick so it can do Blaine…

  20. newllend

    Ahahahaha oh, on god yes finaly, wow that took some time.

  21. Spliced

    I’m worried about what she thinks rose-colored glasses could possibly mean

    1. Aizat

      I used to think that rose-colored glasses is like the same kind that Cyclops wore.

      1. Jen Aside

        The most depraved thing I can think of, now that “strap-on” is no longer a thing, is a set of glasses filled with diluted blood [or stained with blood in the process of making them]. I kinda can’t imagine what could possibly *realistically* be worse than whatever she’s thinking it could be.

        REALITY CAN NO LONGER MEASURE UP =C

        1. Jen Aside

          [having posted that, I thought of The Human Centipede, which I admit to first thinking was some kind of Cirque du Soleil act]

        2. JustCheetoDust

          I’m trying to picture the Human Centipede as a trapeze act.

        3. JustCheetoDust

          I’m probably going to remember that thought at a weird time, like if I have to get stitches.

        4. Doom Shepherd

          The worst thing I can think of involves spectacles and menses.

          I will now go into the next room and scrub my brain with bleach.

      2. nothri

        That sounds way more awesome than what they actually are. Which…is kind of ironic…you used to think they were awesome, but now you realize they aren’t?

    2. Blue Dragon

      It’s easy to make actual rose colored glasses. Go find Rose. Take her glasses. Wipe the glasses on Rose. Keep doing this until some of her color comes off onto the glasses. Some experimentation may be needed, as different techniques will yield different end results. Various techniques include, but are not limited to, seductive and/or violent. Not all techniques are legal in the state of Indiana.

      The resulting glasses will be Rose colored.

      1. Wack'd

        But Rose will not be able to notice the difference, because her eyes are Rose-colored so she sees everything that way all the time.

  22. caesaria82

    Amazing.

  23. astraea

    I’m surprised Joyce doesn’t know what “rose-colored glasses” means. Strap-on, I get, because she was sheltered from the sexy stuff, but rose-colored glasses is common vernacular in English.

    1. Opus the Poet

      I have the feeling that Joyce was sheltered away from even common vernacular, especially terms like “vernacular” that sound vaguely dirty.

    2. David

      Joyce was sheltered from knowing about rose-tinted glasses in order not to be tempted to pull hers off.

  24. John Madden

    Not knowing what rose colored glasses means? Wow.

    The sad part is that people like this exist in real life.

    1. timemonkey

      It’s not as common a phrase as many believe. I’d never heard of it until I watched Rocky Horror.

      1. Wack'd

        I am now imagining Joyce watching Rocky Horror.

        Thank you.

      2. John Madden

        I knew the phrase long before I ever watched Rocky Horror.

  25. Romanticide

    Funny enough one of the adds appeared to have what looked like brown dildos… turned out they were only shoes…

    1. ninja_jesus

      I think you’re onto something here… what if they made DILDO SHOES?!

      1. Wack'd

        Foot fetishists would be thrilled, I imagine.

  26. newllend

    I’m bookmarking this

  27. Idon'tcarenomore

    Jen Aside and I had the same thought.

    First thing I thought was “I’d take off my glasses, cut my finger and wipe blood all over them and hand them to Joyce…rose colored glasses .hehehe

    One way to get rid of her.

  28. jy2

    Remember, kids: Don’t go pretending you know things you don’t, or you will end up googling sparkly rubber man-dangles which may or may not be attached to belts.

  29. Ancestral Hamster

    Joyce, now that you know what a “strap-on” is, when will you wear one so Ethan will like you better? Mmmmm?

  30. Idon'tcarenomore

    Looking at the last panel, I do see that apparently Joyce is smartening up in one whole new respect.

    When she doesn’t know a word or phase now…hopefully she will google it before she opens her mouth.

    A whole world of education online for naïve young home schooled youngsters…provided they take the time to check at least 3 different sources for comparison.

    “Never believe what you hear and only half of what you see.”

  31. Darwin

    You ruined another keyboard! DAMN YOU WILLIS! *proceeds to mop up coughed out Mountain Dew*

  32. ninja_jesus

    So she found the Edward Cullen dildo/strap-on?

    …I’m sorry.

  33. John

    Rose-colored glasses is what you get after you smash a glass in a dude’s face?

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      LIKED!

    2. Aizat

      No..that would be the Crimson Glass.

  34. Chronos

    *sees last panel* *Cheshire cat grin*

  35. Crumplepunch

    I read Man-Dangle as Dan-Mangle.

    That made me happy.

    1. Wack'd

      Your avatar looks appropriately horrified.

  36. Cinematic

    renting means borrowing not actually paying right?

    1. Hinoron

      I wondered about that too, because no: “Rent” implies money changed hands. “Borrowing” is free.

      1. Hinoron

        Usually cults don’t charge marks to view their propaganda. That’s what tithing is for.

  37. Nick Piers

    So she DOES know!

  38. Jon_Sered

    I prefer the natural Man-Dangle as opposed to the sparkly rubber belted ones.

  39. AgentKeen

    Considering her dream, I just imagine the ‘sparkly rubber man-dangle’ is just reinforcing her idea of ‘rub your thing on my tummy’. It’ll just be sparkly next time.

    1. AgentKeen

      Also, last line for book title, or is it too long?

      1. Deanatay

        Sorry, I’ve already copyrighted ‘Sparkly Rubber Man-Dangle’ as my new alt-rock band name.

        1. Wack'd

          He will be legally obligated to make the distinction.

  40. Nyzer

    Is it funny that I think Joyce’s recent appearances show a sudden surge in maturity?

    Any time something goes on around her that should take her out of her comfort zone, she just takes it entirely in stride now.

  41. themaskedpixie

    This happened when i saw captain planet again. My poor childhood.

    1. Sir Robin

      Captain N for me. I had such fond memories but when the DVD came out, it so did not live up to them

    2. Leorale

      Ooh, yeah, that show does NOT hold up.

      Take a look at the AIDS one (which is made in the 1980s, when getting AIDS is a death sentence). The “happy” ending involves some preteen kid optimistically saying he could live up to ten more years, hooray.

      1. Leorale

        Oh man I re-watched that Cpt Planet just now. It’s so bad.
        They’re going for HIV/AIDS awareness.

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7EkB7oUmos

  42. ThemSapphicVibes

    Where did she find sparkly ones??
    I can’t find them anywhere!

    1. Maycroft

      You avatar just adds up comedy.

    2. Opus the Poet

      There was a lady that came to my church selling from a catalog and also selling from stock had them in pink and blue transparent silicone with metalflake. try googling “tupperware of sex”. I think the lady was affiliated with “Passion Parties” line of products, and we had her at the church 4 times in 2 years. I still have the “Stimulating Bath Glove” from their line.

  43. Tenn

    I’m getting a feeling we’re about to see How Willis Lost His Faith: Part One.

  44. Sir Robin

    I discussed yesterday how I read Joyce having the same voice as Pinkie Pie … now imagine that voice reading the last panel

    1. Rybridge

      This comment is full of win.

  45. XMinusOne

    The Sparklee-Dildee with a matching Sparklee harness from Ramco; the perfect wedding gift for the bride and bride. Sold at most adult toy stores nationwide or on the net at http://www.givit2me.com.

    1. StClair

      I dunno about you, but I am not clicking that link. Not even if money was offered.

  46. Alexx

    I don’t often have to refer to a strap-on, but whenever the occasion occurs, I’ll now refer to them as a rubber man-dangle on a belt.

  47. Kirt

    I am in love with Dorothy’s expression in the last panel.

  48. darchosis

    If you shake a man-dangle, does it jangle?

  49. tahrey

    Scar-a-joyce, scar-a-joyce, will you do the man-dangle?

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