142

Muldoon
Posted on June 14, 2019 by David M Willis

142 thoughts on “Muldoon”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    “It would be a metal ONE PIECE THANK YOU”

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      That sounds jolly uncomfortable and hard to move in.

      1. LookingIn

        it’s actually quite comfortable as long as you have the proper padding under the metal and the crotch area isn’t too big.

        Seriously, it’s no different than the various styles of plate armor worn for almost 1,900 years by greeks, romans, knights, and conquistadors…

      2. TheFlamingonator

        How about a chainmail One Piece? Would be pretty dope, as long as you stay out of the sun

      3. Librain

        Would making the one piece the bottom help?
        https://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2015/02/15/25B131FB00000578-0-image-m-9_1423966795988.jpg

    2. LookingIn

      If Wonder Woman can wear it, she can too!

    3. ziggy78eog

      Sorry, but canon dictates that it be a bikini.

  2. Doctor_Who

    Amber cosplays Han or no one.

    She has a metal bikini, but it’s for Walky.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Not even Walky can look that good in a Speedo.

      1. SgtWadeyWilson

        I am simultaneously disappointed and relieved that no artist, fan or otherwise has replied to this with “Challenge Accepted.”

        Also, luckily I couldn’t reliably draw Walky fully clothed, let alone less so, so I don’t feel the need as an artist to fill that void.

      2. TheCerpent

        https://www.advocate.com/arts-entertainment/2018/5/16/viral-hana-solo-and-slave-leo-want-make-star-wars-queerer

        1. KarlBob

          Someone is a genius!

    2. brasca1

      I actually saw some dudes cosplaying as Leia at Comicon a few weeks ago.

  3. Regalli

    Holy Muldoon is just a good interjection.

    1. Regalli

      Also Dina’s pants are cute. 🙂

      1. Chris

        I never, ever, noticed the eyes on the pants.. I feel so unobservant… where can I buy a pair?

    2. Annamal

      Not if you had a Trumpesque ex-prime minister who drunkenly called an election on national television….

      (and also played the narrator in a production of Rocky horror because people have layers).

  4. foamy

    RAPTORS WIN

    One less challenger to the Leafs futility!

    1. Stephen Bierce

      *plays “O Canada” on the loudspeakers on the Quad outside the building*

      1. ValdVin

        I would ask “Will Ruth celebrate?”, but I have a feeling that Ruth is not here for basketball.

        1. Wraithy2773

          I really want to see Dina run up to Ruth, assuming that the Hockey fangirl cares about Toronto’s basketball team :D.

    2. LookingIn

      Thank goodness for the Blue Jays, for a team owned by a major corporation they sure find ways of being cheap and losing their star players!

      At least the Leafs have “salary cap issues” as a legitimate excuse, the Blue Jays have nothing but apathy to blame.

  5. timemonkey

    Walky, YOU should wear the metal bikini.

    1. Robbie

      Not gonna lie, I would enjoy seeing Walky in that bikini. Remember his ABS!?

      1. Madock345

        Can we get this voted in as a patreon bonus comic?

    2. Marsh Maryrose

      Based on Carrie Fisher’s experience, Amber would be able to see all the way to Florida.

      1. LookingIn

        Wouldn’t that be the whole point 😉

        She’d certainly love to see his “panhandle” 😀

        1. He Who Abides

          I don’t think it’d fit. But then again, I might be the only one who feels like Walky wanted the pajama jeans less to be a slob and more because jeans don’t have enough room.

    3. Yotomoe

      You think he wouldn’t wear a metal speedo if given the opportunity?

      1. Tacos

        We can’t be sure he isn’t wearing one now…

        1. ValdVin

          So, “bold of us to assume he isn’t wearing one now”?

  6. Schpoonman

    Walky could pull off a metal speedo, huh?

    Wait, isn’t that a chastity belt?

    1. abysswatcher1993

      A chastity belt would require a key… which Amber would hide until he behaves.

  7. BBCC

    Seriously Walky, have you ever worn a metal bikini?

    It’d be super cold, it’d probably pinch, and it’s metal on your skin. That’s not comfy.

    1. vlademir1

      To be fair, you’d underpad the metal with leather or the like just as one wouldn’t wear medieval armor without a gambeson. Outside that very specific aspect regarding metal directly on one’s skin your point stands.

      1. BBCC

        In universe, it is indeed meant to be metal on skin. IRL, I’m pretty sure it was hard plastic. Regardless, it was still apparently uncomfortable as shit.

    2. Yotomoe

      But it’d be METAL as fuck. Literally and metaphorically.

      1. Clif

        Fair point.

      2. BBCC

        The pinching would cancel it out.

        1. Shameless

          Lining it with leather or heavy cloth would remove the pinching aspect. Just ask Wendy Pini about chainmail bikinis…

        2. BBCC

          Lining it with leather sounds pretty uncomfortable too.

    3. Seregiel

      I have a metal bikini for a costume and all the joints are welded in a way it’s smooth. Hell yes to the cold to put on but it warms up super quick. No lining built in but made to have something under if chosen. (Cleaning products from cloth and metal don’t really play along). There are people who mix crochet and scale maile to make cool dragon stuffier. It’s just not something cleanable in a wearable setting would be my guess.

      1. BBCC

        Sounds much more comfortable than the Star Wars bikini.

  8. ValdVin

    What’s “Holy Muldoon”? Has Walky really been watching Car 54, Where Are You?

    (Ask your parents, or maybe your grandparents.)

    1. Stephen Bierce

      The first human victim of Raptor carnage in the Jurassic Park movie.

      1. ValdVin

        Someday I’ll have to watch one of those Jurassic Park movies.

        1. Makkabee

          “Someday I’ll have to watch one of those Jurassic Park movies.”

          Or just watch “Westworld.” Same author, same plot, just with robots instead of dinosaurs.

        2. Makkabee

          By which I mean the original film with Yul Brynner. The TV show is different, and much more sophisitcated. And, okay, metric shit-tons better.

      2. David M Willis

        muldoon’s not the FIRST!

        1. AGV

          No one remembers poor Jophery

        2. LookingIn

          True…even worse is his death is what sets up the whole point of getting them to the island in the first place!

        3. Schpoonman

          I keep reading “Jophery” pronounced the same as “Joffrey”even though I know it shouldn’t and it’s messing with me something fierce.

      3. Stephen Bierce

        Out In A Blaze Of Ignomity

        1. Rhah

          Except that scene takes place after Mr. Arnold (Samuel L. Jackson) leaves to restore power on his own. Ellie Sattler (Laura Dern) runs to the shed and ‘finds’ Mr. Arnolds arm, while Muldoon is outside giving his meme-spawning one-liner.

        2. RicardtheDragoon

          And according to the XKCD chart I linked, even Arnold is second to someone called Gennaro.

        3. LookingIn

          You are right about Gennaro being killed before Arnold, but Gennaro was killed by the T-Rex when the power was killed. And he was the second person killed after the raptor handler(Jophery Brown) is killed in the opening seconds of the movie and whose death setup the whole chain of events to get the core group to the island

        4. Marsh Maryrose

          The one who died in ignominy is Gennaro, no? The lawyer eaten by T-rex while he was on the toilet?

        5. LookingIn

          that was him….”when you gotta go, you gotta go” is still one of the funniest lines of the movie

      4. RicardtheDragoon

        https://xkcd.com/657/large/
        See the lower left corner for a chart of events in Jurassic Park.

      5. Marsh Maryrose

        The first human victim is Jophery, the gatekeeper. Like, right in the opening scene.

        Give him some dignity, man. Just because he’s not a main cast member doesn’t mean he didn’t exist.

    2. Needfuldoer

      The first thing to come to my mind was that guy who shut Rosie’s Bar down that one time, but DoA isn’t exactly full of M*A*S*H deep cuts…

      1. ValdVin

        Ooh, good deep cut.

  9. newllend(henryvolt)

    Walky seems to be having really high hopes this Halloween.

    1. Lacuna

      It’s Amber. If there’s anyone who would go all out for a one-night costume, it’s her.

      1. John

        She’ll dress up as Amazi-Girl, and then everybody will complain about how inaccurate her costume is.

        1. SgtWadeyWilson

          Bonus points if she’s dressed as Shortpacked! Amazi-Girl, with extras if there’s a line about it being an older version of the costume.

  10. Joe

    Was that Monkey Island reference intentional?

    1. Abel Undercity

      I’m pretty sure that it was.

    2. 3oranges

      Does that count as a Monkey Island reference? The “second biggest” thing was a catch phrase in Get Smart before it, and I’ve heard it in a number of things, from Garfield to Madagascar.

      1. Joe

        Sure, it’s a fairly common joke that a lot of things have used, but Get Smart and Monkey Island are the two that used it frequently enough to have the phrase considered a catch phrase. And just based on Willis’ approximate age, Monkey Island seems more likely.

  11. Cattleprod

    I fail to see the point of cosplaying any Leia costume that doesn’t feature the side hair cinnamon buns. And I otherwise hate hair buns. The term brings up a disturbing mental image.

    1. Yotomoe

      I like the top bun myself. Like Chi-chi in dragonball Z.

      1. Delicious Taffy

        She is a powerful woman, and we do love a powerful woman.

    2. He Who Abides

      Yes to this, Cattleprod. Actually, I’m surprised women don’t use that hairstyle in real life sometimes. I’ve always thought it would look rather nice.

      1. Seregiel

        Have done before and for the most part I did not find how the weight put pressure oh my skull comfy in some designs and the number of pins others needed were ridiculous. I tend to stay away from any hair style that requires a handful of the little black metal demons because my hair eats them.

        1. He Who Abides

          Ah. Thanks for the explanation.

          I still think it would look nice on some women, though.

    3. BarerMender

      If you hate the word bun, you must call it a chignon.

      1. Sunny

        Hair cinnamon rolls? Hair pretzels?

        1. Cattleprod

          The problem is the combo, hair (food). It makes me think about eating hair, and I think that’s why I’ve disliked hair buns ever since I was a kid.

    4. Amazi-Stool

      Obligatory Shortpacked! comic is obligatory (and emotional health is overrated).

  12. Lingo

    …Do Dina’s pants have eyes?!

    1. Yumi

      Check them out here: http://www.dumbingofage.com/2019/comic/book-9-comic/04-vote-for-robin/legitsorries/

      Eyes and teeth

      1. Lingo

        Yeah, I just noticed that one. Don’t know how I missed it the first time. Didn’t read the comments on that one.

      2. Needfuldoer

        Is there an equivalent to “phrasing” for graphic design?

  13. DarkoNeko

    I understood that reference.

  14. Derek

    I do not get the reference

    1. DailyBrad

      Muldoon is the name of one of the raptor’s victims in Jurassic Park, I think the guy who says “Clever Girl”.

      1. Alanari

        And salacious crumb is that little laughing creature sitting on jabbas stomach in star wars. Hence the metal bikini, like the one leia wore as a slave.

        1. fire_daws

          Aaaaah, I got the Muldoon and bikini references but Salacious Crumb escaped me.

          …I suppose I could have google searched it but that requires effort.

  15. Kyrik Michalowski

    I would love to see Amber in a metal bikini but also that sounds wildly uncomfortable.

    1. DailyBrad

      Judging by what Carrie Fisher said of it, yup.

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      A fur bikini like the one Raquel Welch wore in One Million BC would be far more old school and comfy.

    3. Yotomoe

      And that’s when Yoto realized he had the gift of artistic ability. Shall he share it with the world, or selfishly horde it like he always does?

      1. Marsh Maryrose

        How can we worship you as a living god if you never bestow your gifts upon us?

      2. Clif

        Are we taking votes?

        1. ValdVin

          I vote “share”.

      3. Schpoonman

        You used to share quite a bit. Your art style is delightful if I’m remembering correctly.

    4. Sunny

      The solution is chainmail.

      1. Seregiel

        Unless each ring is welded, that can be more uncomfortable then we’ll designed and rolled plate. Overall easier to execute comfortably though if you’re taking that time.

  16. Ele

    Heh, nice geeky update. Holy Muldoon? Cool. Salacious Crumb? Just as cool.

  17. DailyBrad

    So much nerdery contained in one room. I am impressed.

    1. Marsh Maryrose

      As long as we’re entertaining meta references for DoA book titles, “So Much Nerdery Contained in One Room” nicely fills the bill.

      1. Needfuldoer

        Sounds like a good title for a DoA book box set, if the box gets printed to look like a dorm room.

        (Print the inside of the box, and it will be a diorama for the fridge magnets!)

  18. Lacuna

    I feel like the Raptor is warping time and space around it and making the dorm bigger on the inside then it looks from the outside, and that’s why everyone can still move around that gargantuan thing.

    I have two questions.

    1. Is reality warping against campus rules?
    2. How long until Amber and Dina make their own TARDIS?

    1. Marsh Maryrose

      Raptorspace is to Hammerspace as Aleph-one is to Aleph-null.

  19. Piotr W

    “She is yet undevoured”. Is Dina being matter-of-fact here, or is it a subtle joke on her part?

    1. Bathymetheus

      Dina may be on the autism spectrum, in which case she probably means it literally, and is unaware of the double entêndre.

      Amber, however, almost certainly gets it.

      1. Regalli

        Speaking as an autistic person, we are capable of joking. Could go either way for me.

        1. Delicious Taffy

          Shh, don’t tell them about that. It’s funnier if they think we’re 100% literal. You can get away with so much bullshit, that way.

  20. Sporky

    It’s way too easy to imagine Dina puppeteering a sinister Jim Henson creature.

  21. Lacuna

    Wait.

    Does this mean Jabba the Hutt was a dinosaur this whole time?

    1. King Daniel

      The real reason he was angry with Han was because the smuggler was responsible for the loss of all his dino-limbs. And feathers.

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      Does that mean that Jabba was meant to have feathers?

      1. Sunny

        Like those brazilian dancers at carnival. Now there’s an interesting mental image.

    3. BenRG

      As far as Walky knows, yes. That, of course, means practically nothing in objective terms.

  22. EvilMidnightLurker

    Missed it by that much!

    …would you believe it was a mint in box Dinobot?

    (Look, someone has to demonstrate the other reference Walky’s making!)

  23. Yotomoe

    I know it’s wrong but I’m hoping Walky and Amber end up Snogging. Macking. Sucking face. Playing tonsil hockey. And y’know. Make out a bit too.

    1. Schpoonman

      What if they–

      *GASP*

      –kiss?

      1. Schpoonman

        I really hope they do.

        After you change his grades back and start seeing a therapist, Amber. That this is important.

      2. Marsh Maryrose

        You think those t-two might smooch? On the mouth?

        (I guess it would be an acceptable consequence.)

      3. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet

        God forbid, it might lead to dancing.

        1. Goshii

          Or even *gasp* hand holding?

    2. Keulen

      And maybe kissing as well.

  24. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet

    The only “Muldoon” I know is the solid one. Because I have odd interests, and phony petrified giants are apparently among them.

    1. ValdVin

      Move over, Cardiff Giant! There’s a new hoax in town!

  25. DT

    Next slipshine: Amber in metal bikini and Walky in “fresh out of carbonite” Solo clothes plz.

  26. abysswatcher1993

    Dorothy: “Is Walky covered in carbonite?”
    Amber: “Yes.”
    Dorothy: “Why?”
    Amber: “He mocked Ultra Car again in front of Carla, and she invented a carbonite machine.”

    1. Needfuldoer

      Carbonite Solo?

    2. FacelessDeviant

      A CARbonite machine huh?

  27. BenRG

    Yeah, Walky? The chances of getting Amber into what Carrie Fisher described as both hideously embarrassing and awfully uncomfortable is pretty close to zero. That said, having mentioned it, Willis has pretty much guaranteed that he will face overwhelming reader pressure to create the pin-up.

    “Holy Muldoon” proves that, even when surprised, Walky’s pop culture wits are fully with him!

    1. Catman

      Next patron bonus strip?

    2. Seregiel

      She also hated just the plain leis costume because apparently bras can’t exist in space. Lucky for us the next gen was allowed the small luxuries… like undergarments for their comfort.

  28. Matt

    That’s the second biggest monkey head I’ve ever seen!

  29. Ohmsford

    Is anyone else having Semme flashbacks from Walky’s shirt?

    1. ValdVin

      Yep. It’s a real shirt Willis saw at a store, per his Tumblr.

      https://dumbingofage.tumblr.com/post/183540510037/dumbingofage-walky-btw-the-hoodies-real-and

    2. VanVelding

      Glad someone else saw that. Thought I was going crazy.

  30. Keulen

    “Holy Muldoon!” would make a good book title. Likewise, “That’s the second-largest plush velociraptor I’ve ever seen.”

  31. Bagge

    Walky treats the giant plushie dinosaur with the level of respect Dina feels it deserves.

  32. ziggy78eog

    “Bikini Leia” Amber, you know you wanna draw that, Willis.

  33. Roborat

    So many references in one page, I almost can’t process them all.

  34. Mr. Anderson

    Hoping the Monkey Island reference was intentional.

    1. Kamino Neko

      What Monkey Island reference?

      We have Jurassic Park (Muldoon), Get Smart (‘Second largest…’), and Star Wars (the rest).

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