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Past time
Posted on November 27, 2020 by David M Willis
It's the day after Thanksgiving, and long-time readers know what that means:  this year's Kickstartered Dumbing of Age book collection goes up for sale in the online store!  So there it is, Book Nine: Title Too Long To Transcribe is available for your holiday purchase.   It's 216 pages, has all of Year Nine's comics (including Patreon bonus comics), bonus art and rejected strips, commentary, and has a foreword by John Kovalic! Slightly less long-time readers know what this day additionally means: last year's Kickstartered magnets also go on sale in the online store!  What's left of them, anyway.  We're a little short on Dinobot Dinas, so she's not included, but the other 11 are in sufficient supply.  The first set of magnets is finally run out, so that's retired, but you can get a bundle of all four remaining magnet sets, if you wanna. ALSO: USPS has been ... not delivering me my envelopes, so unless that crate of 90 flat rate padded envelopes that's been sitting somewhere in Cincinnati according to the tracking information since Monday finally gets here, like, tomorrow, I'll be waiting at least a day to get those fresh orders out to you.  Just keep that in mind!  I mean, hopefully it'll be tomorrow.  Tracking information has been saying "tomorrow" for four days now!  Thanks, lame duck President!  Despite your kneecapping of our postal service, you lost anyway!  MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE JUST LEFT IT ALONE.

77 thoughts on “Past time”

  1. Sirksome

    Amber’s devastated by this new pranking Dina.

  2. Doctor_Who

    Amber: Did you replace my mint toothpaste with cinnamon toothpaste?

    Dina: Laughing-out-loud, pranked.

    1. Cattleprod

      Since cinnamon candy is forged out of concentrated evil, I assume cinnamon toothpaste is similarly vile and this is indeed a terrible prank.

      1. Doctor_Who

        You’ve never tried bubblegum toothpaste. You know that pink slime in Ghostbusters 2 which is pure concentrated evil? Bubblegum toothpaste.

        1. Los

          Seconded

        2. Geneseepaws

          We’ve secretly replaced Amber’s regular toothpaste with Folgers’ Crystals…..

        3. Opus the Poet

          Muttley laugh. And my spell checker has forgotten how to spell Muttley and marks all variations as wrong. This is of course a logical fallacy.

        4. He Who Abides

          Shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh shhh.

      2. Needfuldoer

        Cinnamon gum is best winter gum.

  3. Hazel

    Dina is the best prankster

    1. Keulen

      Agreed. Nobody pranks better than Dina.

    2. Deanatay

      I imagine that, instead of laughing, Dina simply plays back a recording of the Potty Mouth laughter from The Sims.

      “Ha. Ha. Ha. Hee. Hee. Hee.”

  4. Nono

    McCree disapproved of this joke.

  5. kat

    which one is the lie?

    1. Lawzlo

      Both. It’s 10:43am.

      1. Demoted Oblivious

        Another lie. It was 12:11. Now it is roughly 0900.

    2. Roborat

      The real joke is that it is Saturday.

      1. He Who Abides

        But for me, it was Tuesday.

  6. Slartibeast Button, BIA

    And so it begins…

  7. Kyrik Michalowski

    Truly Dina, you are the Moriarty to her Holmes, and we thank you for it.

  8. BBCC

    Excellent job, Dina. Becky will be proud.

  9. Stephen Bierce

    Whenever you call me, I’ll be there
    Whenever you want me, I’ll be there
    Whenever you need me, you know, you know
    I’ll Be Around    …

    1. Stephen Bierce

      This is our “bump in the road”…

  10. King Daniel

    Dumbing of Age Book 11: You Have Been Pranked

  11. brionl

    I sometimes tell people I came in first runner-up at the International Liar’s Olympics in Reno, NV.

    1. Dean

      Fiendish! Not many people know that the Liar’s Olympics were in Laughlin.

      1. Bicycle Bill

        There actually is a Liars’ Club HQed in Burlington, WI.  Professional liars such as politicians, lawyers, and used-car salesmen are not allowed to become members.

  12. Bruceski

    That is a beautiful alt-text, I think I have to steal it.

    1. Kernanator

      Not only is it beautiful, it’s a callback!

  13. Jonah Sanville

    jerry seinfeld got nothing on dina

  14. Bagge

    “I gave you incorrect information. Isn’t this joyful?”

  15. Sporky

    God I love Dina

  16. ADLegend21

    HA get pranked nerd!

  17. Rabid Rabbit

    Are books 7-9 going to end up in combos at any point?

    1. clif

      Mike was in charge of that decision. And now Mike’s dead in witness protection.

      1. King Daniel

        Mike’s reincarnated as Asher’s bike!

  18. NinjaNick

    Wakey wakey!

  19. Los

    Every time Dina makes the punchline I wanna put my hands up and run around my apartment yelling GOOOOOAAAAALLL

    1. Needfuldoer

      You know she has a running tally of the ones that land. Gradual improvement over time!

  20. Michael Steamweed

    Suspicious Amber is not fooled by Dina’s subtlety.

  21. Cmasta1992

    Thoroughly japed again by the Great Dina!!!

    1. lightsabermario

      Nyeh heh heh!

  22. Reltzik

    I KNEW Daylight Savings Time was a prank!

  23. Opus the Poet

    Mouseover text is correct.

  24. Moon

    oh same

  25. foducool

    she’s so damn pure

  26. BenRG

    Ah, humour. Such a gloriously human concept! Arf-arf.

    Seriously, I wonder how Dina would react to the knowledge that she is becoming ever more Joyce in her behaviour?

  27. Lone Duck

    Imagine a GIF of about six guys all yelling “OHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!”” has ben placed here.

  28. Charles Spencer

    Those undelivered envelopes in Cincinatti were mistaken for absentee ballots and are actually impounded at the request of the Ohio GOP.

    1. Demoted Oblivious

      Of course the complaint is that they are votes for Trump that never got counted. !Fraud!

  29. DarkoNeko

    oh no it’s adorkable

  30. vlademir1

    MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE JUST LEFT IT ALONE.

    I hate to have to say it, but even as a lame duck it serves his party’s interest in privatizing the whole affair (while ignoring how much the logistics companies rely on the USPS as background infrastructure) but it also serves him by being one more roadblock for the incoming administration to have to clean up and he can build a new career as a talking head on the back of calling Biden incompetent.

    1. Demoted Oblivious

      And vice versa. It’s worth looking up who provides overnight delivery for the USPS.

      Hint: It is NOT the USPS.

  31. Madock345

    So, It’s standing out as weird to me how pretty much the entire cast except Joe sleeps with some kind of top on. It’s not even for censoring purposes since it’s all the guys and even girls in scenes like this where we still wouldn’t see anything if Amber was topless. Is that actually normal? Am I the one who’s weird for not being able to stand sleeping in a shirt? But I don’t remember my roommates doing that either so maybe it isn’t just me…

    1. siburyo

      I have always slept naked, but when I was living in a dorm in college I slept in underwear and a really thin tank top because I thought it might make my roommates uncomfortable. Don’t know how to explain the guys though…

      1. Kali

        As someone who… like, looked and lived as a male in college, I wore sweatpants and a shirt to bed everynight… cause I’m self concious about my body is always a state of things…. but, like, take that with like, the whole salt packet, cause you know… “Transwoman being uncomfortable with her body when she was identifying as male” prolly isn’t your best data set now that i think about it…

    2. Cheshrin

      Sal sleeps in just gloves and a pair of underwear, so it’s not just Joe. (Though she might have thrown on something warmer for the winter.)

    3. KJ

      also sal

  32. He Who Abides

    Happy Folgers incest commercial season, everybody.

    1. Needfuldoer

      Don’t forget the new remake of the Hallmark Christmas movie! They re-rolled all the character names this year!

      1. Roborat

        That was funny, my wife always watches those cookie cutter movies, so I sent her the link.

        1. Needfuldoer

          There’s plenty more where that came from!

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hNoZHUDB3GU

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fa7baSCfl4U

  33. Rabisch

    Fina is slowing becoming a prankmaster. At this rate she will be able to awake Amber at 3am. Saying she is lvery ate for her 10:00 am class.

    1. Demoted Oblivious

      Hooray for touchscreen interfaces. The biggest lie ST:TNG ever told!

      (until electro-capacitive-tactile screens get to market)

  34. Deanatay

    “In other news, I am told that your mother has gained a substantial amount of weight.”

    1. ValdVin

      I laughed more than I should have at that.

    2. Anon A Mouse

      I’m not sure Dina would ever go into the insulting side of humor. Even if she understands the context and knows she won’t be taken seriously she doesn’t seem the type to use that type of joke.

      Also, I lol’d. It sounds like the kind of joke Data would make.

  35. AbelUndercity

    I will defend my dinosaur-loving little sister with my life, I do so now swear.

  36. Needfuldoer

    Nice callback, alt-text.

  37. Jhon

    Dina scares me.

  38. JessWitt

    And another reason why I’m like Dina – we’re still fine-tuning our jokes and pranks.

  39. Arianod

    Prank accomplished!

  40. valis_kr3

    Keep working at it.

  41. David Doty

    Are we supposed to wonder why Amber is oversleeping so badly, or is this just an indication that she has been regularly sleeping past noon in a depressive funk?

    1. BBCC

      Neither, I don’t think. Honestly, sleeping until 11 AM when you stay up as late as Amber does (her roller derby seems to go pretty late), isn’t that big a deal as long as she doesn’t have class.

  42. Ana Chronistic

    Dina, don’t explain the joke

    also, fuck Standard Time

    [inb4: I fell asleep with my eyes open, don’t even care, shooting for last comment this time]

    1. Deanatay

      Good work, you got it!

      …wait, I just ruined it, didn’t !

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