I’m more hoping for the *children* call out parents arc. But as long as someone is doing it, I’m here for it.
Doing my best, which ain’t very good, but I’m also here for the day when my kids call me out. Not for the little shit (they already do❤), but for whatever big shit I’m fucking them up with.
RoyanRannedos
Kids are at a big disadvantage in calling out their parents. The biases that shape your reactions form during childhood, and they take priority in the brain’s order of operations.
If it’s a threatening situation (like parents withholding love or your carnal desires pointing you toward damnation), then the pattern recognition center of the brain takes a shortcut to the action center, only deigning to inform the frontal lobe milliseconds later. The vision processing center at the back of the brain gets the signal even later, which explains why tunnel vision and hesitation often come at such moments.
Danny doesn’t have a lifetime of reinforcement of the danger of standing up to the Walkertons, so it’s a monumentally lower hurdle to clear. Of course, that means when the children call out parents, its more of a triumphal breakthrough for their authentic lives.
In fairness on this one, I’ve seen FAR more white guys with multiple piercings and snakes for pets than black guys. That’s more on the “Our daughter is with a rebellious crowd, so her bringing a white-bread boyfriend is… unexpected.”
makes me wonder if sal’s brought boys home specifically to piss off her parents tho i wonder if Jen would still be considered ‘favorable’ in their eyes if they saw her drunk issues and all, other than her own parents covering it up i’m sure a ‘head cheerleader getting drunk and cashing’ would be a huge local scandal
Joke’s on them. The student with the 16 nose rings and the pet cobra, Guillaume, wants to remain a virgin until he’s married. Unlike Danny, who had kinky sex with the local superheroine.
Dubcon with Spidey, wasn’t quite anticipating that, but here we are.
Clif
This comment section never fails to be educational.
Imogen
Luckily, frantic screaming is actually just their safeword. All fully above-board.
Miri
… I know it’s supposed to be playful and it’s never just been kids reading comics, but kids struggle with nuance. I dislike this.
Wizard
Not good, but still not as bad as the storyline where MJ died of cancer of the lady parts due to repeated exposure to Pete’s radioactive Spider-jizz.
Taffy
That’s an unfair comparison. Most things are better than that stupid-ass miniseries. I’m sure it’s got some very interesting ideas, but “hur hur radioactive spider-cum” isn’t one of them.
It goes beyond kink. I never bought into the idea of Superman and Lois Lane. He’d have gutted her like a fish.
Yotomoe
Clearly she tops him and he lets her do all the work.
PedanticJerkass
If Superman is anything like Hancock (i.e. the main character of that Will Smith superhero movie from 2008, for the uninitiated), that still wouldn’t save her.
Which is frankly nonsense. Being a fictional character from a fictional species the writers are free to write sex with Superman as safe. Frankly I suspect his powers are variable, or anyone who ran into him would be injured because of his invulnerability. I suspect that essay says more about Larry Niven than it does about Superman.
Doctor_Who
Yeah, the “woman of kleenex” thing has always been nonsense.
Does Superman accidentally rip doors off the hinges everywhere he goes? When he saves people, do their limbs get torn off? Does every criminal he punches land in the next zip code?
No, because while he possesses incredible strength, he’s also capable of not using it all the time.
I mean, I’m no kryptonian, but I’m a person of normal strength and would thus be perfectly capable of hurting someone if I used it indiscriminately. And yet I am able to engage in intimacy with a fellow human without leaving them covered in bruises.
Just Karen
Yeah, but that’s controlled movement or learned reflex. An orgasm is incredibly hard to learn how to control, I suspect.
Not that I think you’re wrong; just that it’s a bit less likely. More likely. Whatever.
Notice how Charles at least managed to sound happily surprised as opposed to Linda just saying she can live with it? Like, I’m not happy with Charles either but if he’s not actually trying, he’s at least pretending to try.
I have the distinct impression that Charles is easily swayed and, absent Linda’s much stronger influence, could easily be influenced into more supportive behavior. His behavior towards Sal is still quite bad, but he’s much more personable and seems to consistently make a slightly stronger effort to reach out (whereas Linda always just shuts Sal down out the gate).
However, he is unfortunately paired with Linda, and as the old saying goes, “he’s not evil, but when he gets close to it, he picks up its flavor. Like a mushroom or something.”
It’s fascinating to see how the evil parents work in Willis-land. Unless I’m missing something, if the evil parents are a couple, the mothers are always worse (Linda, Carol, Naomi), while the fathers are weak and go along with it, with the exception of Hank, who shows some potential for growth. Meanwhile, the overtly evil father figures (Blaine, Toedad, Sir) are all single at this point. (Not that Blaine wasn’t evil back when he and Stacy were together, but you get what I mean.)
dralou
Interesting point, but unless I have missed a page (very possible), Blaine was not single when we last saw him alive. He was in couple with Faz’s mom. She’s… far, far, far from perfect, but she was less evil than Blaine.
Miri
Blaine beat Stacey. Toedad most likely contributed to Becky’s mother committing suicide (and may have hit her… He didn’t seem remorseful about slapping Becky, apparently they grew up with hitting kids with spoons for misbehaving being normalised…).
Linda is mainly awful to Sal. Carol wasn’t awful towards Hank (and a lot of her worst prejudices and toxicities would have been hidden to him by his own religious prejudices and inflexibilities until he took the step backwards and realised he’d mistaken being righteous for being a good person. He was willing to step back and think where she doubled down… He grew as a person. She sold her house to support her church financially because it might lose the auditorium as a result of its culpability in her daughter being kidnapped and her daughter’s friend being murdered…).
Naomi… Again mainly awful to her son that we’ve seen (what was the quote? “I didn’t stop loving you. You just became a disappointment”?) but also Amber… But also possibly Ethan’s dad is gay and in serious denial (“sex can be like beer: horrible but you need to have it til you don’t hate it any more”) and can’t leave her because then his whole life and identity will unravel and who will he even have left to be?
So the dads were kinda single for a reason. Now Hank’s seen how crappy Linda can be and how dismissive of people’s pain, lives, etc, and what she can twist into “but religion says so, so you’re wrong” – she is single.
spriteless aunty
It’s repeating with Raidah that guy. Perhaps in Willis’ schema of relationships, one person is stronger than the other, and strong+evil men are so selfish they drive off women, while strong+evil women can control their ‘partners’. But what would weak evil look like? Charles is pretty much all I can imagine. Or maybe my idea of strong is skewed. Or, without evil, I don’t feel the need to figure out who’s to blame for the evil, and is therefore stronger.
crimes aside maybe she was a daddy’s girl before all that, or just more understanding of her and marcie’s situation, but in most of the flashbacks most of the arguing/animosity was aimed towards the mom
tho i imagine neither of them would expect it to be too long term, it’d def be more eye-raising for someone to be introduced as like a ‘fiancee’ (seems a bit quick tho i’m sure it happens, other than marrying richer some ppl tend to get married out of hihg school/college)
If I were a betting queer, I’d put money on Linda being generally mean and judgemental while pretending she’s not, and Charles generally refusing to engage with the situation in any useful way.
I thought “taking that bet” meant that you were on the opposite end of it? IE, you bet that it isn’t Linda being mean and judgemental, and Charles engaging with the situation?
If this sends anyone else on a pop-punk/emo/what-the-fuck-ever genre spiral as well, you’re welcome. I’ll be listening to The Academy Is… for the next day or three.
That’s the one. Knew it immediately upon reading what Willis wrote.
Don’t think he fits Sal’s vibe but it gave me a good laugh, thanks Willis and thank ya Schpoonman for posting the link
178 thoughts on “Readjust”
Ana Chronistic
“see if you can subtlely pull off if there’s a face mask”
“I don’t think that’s a thing that does subtle?”
Doctor_Who
“Whoops, I tripped and accidentally grabbed your nose on the way down. Hmmm, that’s on there pretty good.”
(Later)
“Whoops, I tripped again, this time while holding a bucket of glue-dissolving solvent.”
Furie
Never has a username seemed so apropos to the comment.
Decidedly Orthogonal
No mom. No dad. He’s real, and he’s spectacular.
…
Which is more than can be said about you two.
(I’m calling them a couple of boobs. Not the good kind.)
Serendipity
It begins.
Clif
Fortunately it seems that Danny left the banjo at home.
Good move.
Laura
Ukelele?
Someguy
Tomato, potato
Decidedly Orthogonal
It’s potahto tomahto!
Samniel
I mean, the ukulele made him look even whiter, that might’ve been a plus.
Cimorene
Banjolele
Animedingo
I hope she gets called out as racist sooner or later.
Walky was right when he said
“Youve never given her a reason to stay”
Bryy
I firmly believe this is the Boyfriends Call Out Mothers arc.
Needfuldoer
Here’s hoping!
Decidedly Orthogonal
I’m more hoping for the *children* call out parents arc. But as long as someone is doing it, I’m here for it.
Doing my best, which ain’t very good, but I’m also here for the day when my kids call me out. Not for the little shit (they already do❤), but for whatever big shit I’m fucking them up with.
RoyanRannedos
Kids are at a big disadvantage in calling out their parents. The biases that shape your reactions form during childhood, and they take priority in the brain’s order of operations.
If it’s a threatening situation (like parents withholding love or your carnal desires pointing you toward damnation), then the pattern recognition center of the brain takes a shortcut to the action center, only deigning to inform the frontal lobe milliseconds later. The vision processing center at the back of the brain gets the signal even later, which explains why tunnel vision and hesitation often come at such moments.
Danny doesn’t have a lifetime of reinforcement of the danger of standing up to the Walkertons, so it’s a monumentally lower hurdle to clear. Of course, that means when the children call out parents, its more of a triumphal breakthrough for their authentic lives.
Stu
In fairness on this one, I’ve seen FAR more white guys with multiple piercings and snakes for pets than black guys. That’s more on the “Our daughter is with a rebellious crowd, so her bringing a white-bread boyfriend is… unexpected.”
MM
“I can readjust,” says Linda, her eye visibly twitching.
Maveric1984
I can see why you think her eye is twitching, but I think that’s just old people wrinkles. There’s a line under her eye in the last panel too
Laura
But the grimace is noticeable there too.
Laura
(In panel 2, I mean)
Vanessa
She’s definitely having a hard time but she seems to be trying to make a polite, welcoming smile.
Taffy
It’s her daughter, she shouldn’t have to try. She should be grateful Sal even talks to her.
Decidedly Orthogonal
Para bailar La Bongo
La Bongo supremo
Se necessita una poca de gracia
Una poca de gracia
Good luck Sal. You deserve better.
UrsulaDavina
Bloody punk rockers! if my son was punk rocker I scorn him I would!
Puppeteer Nessus
Star Trek 4 guy on the bus
Doctor_Who
I was picturing Hobie from the recent Spider-Verse movie.
…Honestly, he and Sal would probably be good friends.
Schpoonman
Hobie is fucking awesome.
Ray Radlein
Kirk Thatcher! One Jim Henson’s top puppeteers
Jon
Loved his reprise in season two of “Picard”.
Chaucer59
Racist or not, the ‘rents’ response is perfect.
Wraithy2773
I think even Sal would go “…yeah, that’s fair…” :D.
Angel
makes me wonder if sal’s brought boys home specifically to piss off her parents tho i wonder if Jen would still be considered ‘favorable’ in their eyes if they saw her drunk issues and all, other than her own parents covering it up i’m sure a ‘head cheerleader getting drunk and cashing’ would be a huge local scandal
Needfuldoer
There’s no way they’d be unaware of Jennifer’s DUI.
They’d excuse it, but they know about it.
Bryy
Lets not give racists a leg up.
RassilonTDavros
“Be an asshole, but don’t look like you’re being an asshole.”
Maveric1984
I don’t know, asshole casually!
keithcurtis
clap-clap-clap
Decidedly Orthogonal
I knew it. I’m surrounded by assholes.
*thunk*
Keep firing, Assholes!
Stephen Bierce
*plays Eric Clapton’s “Wonderful Tonight” from a passing car’s audio system*
tim gueguen
Joke’s on them. The student with the 16 nose rings and the pet cobra, Guillaume, wants to remain a virgin until he’s married. Unlike Danny, who had kinky sex with the local superheroine.
Doctor_Who
Honestly, sex with most superheroes has at least an element of kink.
Actual page from a 90s Spider-Man comic book.
DailyBrad
Dubcon with Spidey, wasn’t quite anticipating that, but here we are.
Clif
This comment section never fails to be educational.
Imogen
Luckily, frantic screaming is actually just their safeword. All fully above-board.
Miri
… I know it’s supposed to be playful and it’s never just been kids reading comics, but kids struggle with nuance. I dislike this.
Wizard
Not good, but still not as bad as the storyline where MJ died of cancer of the lady parts due to repeated exposure to Pete’s radioactive Spider-jizz.
Taffy
That’s an unfair comparison. Most things are better than that stupid-ass miniseries. I’m sure it’s got some very interesting ideas, but “hur hur radioactive spider-cum” isn’t one of them.
Chaucer59
It goes beyond kink. I never bought into the idea of Superman and Lois Lane. He’d have gutted her like a fish.
Yotomoe
Clearly she tops him and he lets her do all the work.
PedanticJerkass
If Superman is anything like Hancock (i.e. the main character of that Will Smith superhero movie from 2008, for the uninitiated), that still wouldn’t save her.
thejeff
Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex
tim gueguen
Which is frankly nonsense. Being a fictional character from a fictional species the writers are free to write sex with Superman as safe. Frankly I suspect his powers are variable, or anyone who ran into him would be injured because of his invulnerability. I suspect that essay says more about Larry Niven than it does about Superman.
Doctor_Who
Yeah, the “woman of kleenex” thing has always been nonsense.
Does Superman accidentally rip doors off the hinges everywhere he goes? When he saves people, do their limbs get torn off? Does every criminal he punches land in the next zip code?
No, because while he possesses incredible strength, he’s also capable of not using it all the time.
I mean, I’m no kryptonian, but I’m a person of normal strength and would thus be perfectly capable of hurting someone if I used it indiscriminately. And yet I am able to engage in intimacy with a fellow human without leaving them covered in bruises.
Just Karen
Yeah, but that’s controlled movement or learned reflex. An orgasm is incredibly hard to learn how to control, I suspect.
Not that I think you’re wrong; just that it’s a bit less likely. More likely. Whatever.
Angel
Those guys tend to be either the most chill guys ever or even more awful than some bigoted parents despite the ‘punk’ look
Rectilinear Propagation
The worst. THE. WORST.
Notice how Charles at least managed to sound happily surprised as opposed to Linda just saying she can live with it? Like, I’m not happy with Charles either but if he’s not actually trying, he’s at least pretending to try.
Jon
I have the distinct impression that Charles is easily swayed and, absent Linda’s much stronger influence, could easily be influenced into more supportive behavior. His behavior towards Sal is still quite bad, but he’s much more personable and seems to consistently make a slightly stronger effort to reach out (whereas Linda always just shuts Sal down out the gate).
However, he is unfortunately paired with Linda, and as the old saying goes, “he’s not evil, but when he gets close to it, he picks up its flavor. Like a mushroom or something.”
Rabid Rabbit
It’s fascinating to see how the evil parents work in Willis-land. Unless I’m missing something, if the evil parents are a couple, the mothers are always worse (Linda, Carol, Naomi), while the fathers are weak and go along with it, with the exception of Hank, who shows some potential for growth. Meanwhile, the overtly evil father figures (Blaine, Toedad, Sir) are all single at this point. (Not that Blaine wasn’t evil back when he and Stacy were together, but you get what I mean.)
dralou
Interesting point, but unless I have missed a page (very possible), Blaine was not single when we last saw him alive. He was in couple with Faz’s mom. She’s… far, far, far from perfect, but she was less evil than Blaine.
Miri
Blaine beat Stacey. Toedad most likely contributed to Becky’s mother committing suicide (and may have hit her… He didn’t seem remorseful about slapping Becky, apparently they grew up with hitting kids with spoons for misbehaving being normalised…).
Linda is mainly awful to Sal. Carol wasn’t awful towards Hank (and a lot of her worst prejudices and toxicities would have been hidden to him by his own religious prejudices and inflexibilities until he took the step backwards and realised he’d mistaken being righteous for being a good person. He was willing to step back and think where she doubled down… He grew as a person. She sold her house to support her church financially because it might lose the auditorium as a result of its culpability in her daughter being kidnapped and her daughter’s friend being murdered…).
Naomi… Again mainly awful to her son that we’ve seen (what was the quote? “I didn’t stop loving you. You just became a disappointment”?) but also Amber… But also possibly Ethan’s dad is gay and in serious denial (“sex can be like beer: horrible but you need to have it til you don’t hate it any more”) and can’t leave her because then his whole life and identity will unravel and who will he even have left to be?
So the dads were kinda single for a reason. Now Hank’s seen how crappy Linda can be and how dismissive of people’s pain, lives, etc, and what she can twist into “but religion says so, so you’re wrong” – she is single.
spriteless aunty
It’s repeating with Raidah that guy. Perhaps in Willis’ schema of relationships, one person is stronger than the other, and strong+evil men are so selfish they drive off women, while strong+evil women can control their ‘partners’. But what would weak evil look like? Charles is pretty much all I can imagine. Or maybe my idea of strong is skewed. Or, without evil, I don’t feel the need to figure out who’s to blame for the evil, and is therefore stronger.
Angel
crimes aside maybe she was a daddy’s girl before all that, or just more understanding of her and marcie’s situation, but in most of the flashbacks most of the arguing/animosity was aimed towards the mom
tho i imagine neither of them would expect it to be too long term, it’d def be more eye-raising for someone to be introduced as like a ‘fiancee’ (seems a bit quick tho i’m sure it happens, other than marrying richer some ppl tend to get married out of hihg school/college)
thejeff
But it’s also Charles who starts with the “she can’t really mean Danny” bit.
Taffy
If I were a betting queer, I’d put money on Linda being generally mean and judgemental while pretending she’s not, and Charles generally refusing to engage with the situation in any useful way.
UrsulaDavina
I’d take that bet
Mr D
I thought “taking that bet” meant that you were on the opposite end of it? IE, you bet that it isn’t Linda being mean and judgemental, and Charles engaging with the situation?
Vanessa
Yup, seems likely.
Schpoonman
The only “Snakes on a Plane” music video I can conjure is the video for Cobra Starship’s “Bring it!”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1wMyKQ6jUg
If this sends anyone else on a pop-punk/emo/what-the-fuck-ever genre spiral as well, you’re welcome. I’ll be listening to The Academy Is… for the next day or three.
k
That’s the one. Knew it immediately upon reading what Willis wrote.
Don’t think he fits Sal’s vibe but it gave me a good laugh, thanks Willis and thank ya Schpoonman for posting the link
BOOSTER SHOT