159

Ready
Posted on February 21, 2014 by David M Willis

159 thoughts on “Ready”

  1. David Herbert

    Is it me or does Billie look odd with her hair down?

    1. Jen Aside

      Sal-ness increased by 200%!

      1. Jen Aside

        (though, she kinda looks like me now, except with bangs)

        1. AJBulldis

          Grow the bangs, become the Billie.

        2. Jen Aside

          CUT them, surely?!

        3. AJBulldis

          I don’t really know how girl hair works.

        4. Jen Aside

          …I was gonna explain this, but it reeked of “well, actually”-ing, and anyway there’s Google

          srsly tho!

        5. WaveRocker

          But alcoholism is bad
          And also I think we want her to keep her femurs safe

        6. ThaMojster

          alcoholism is baad, mmkaay?

    2. Boom

      Actually, she looks like she’s going through withdrawal.

    3. Nee Hou

      Looks a little like Lucy Van Pelt.

    4. Arkadi

      She looks hot. For a cartoon character, anyway.

    5. Arkadi

      She looks hot.

      1. Arkadi

        Double post? Damn, sorry for that.

  2. Ben

    Joyce’s thought – TWINS!!!

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      and by twins, you mean Billie’s chest puppies right?

      1. Ben

        well… those too…

        1. LJoL

          It is kind of scary how many characters end up dressing like Joyce and then making a quick wardrobe change.

        2. begbert2

          When you’re dressed like Joyce, you *know* you’re doing something wrong.

    2. Tom Speelman

      As Willis said, hoodie dresses for everyone!

      1. Thomas

        The joke gets kinda smothered due to dark colouring, at least on my PC. Billie’s hoodie dress is not immediately obvious.

    3. Cass

      Ha, I totally didn’t get what was going on there until your comment. My brain was reading it as some strange guilt-reaction to the whole Ruth thing; your stereotypical cheerleader usually has a ponytail, Billy feels guilty and awful about what happened with Ruth, so since Ruth had been reaching out to her with cheerleady stuff Billy reacts to feeling unworthy by going out in front of other people being as uncheerleadery as she can, dressing in drab sweats and letting her hair down (when its not even bouncy).
      Then I read down to your comment and realized I was waaaaaaaayyyyyyy over-reading things ’cause I didn’t get it.

      (Part of it might be because even with the hood and pouch right there my brain keeps trying to parse what Joyce’s wearing as a sweater and so doesn’t see them as matching. It’s her cute hidey-hands, they’re what jumps out to me most and I associate that with sweaters since they what always do it to me!)

      1. Jaxx Sentinel

        If it helps, my brain translated this page as “college student logic, class can suck it , it’s early “

      2. ArkArks

        Don’t worry, it took me a whole day to realize it. I’ll never understand what the problem is with matching looks.

  3. Wonder Wig

    I suddenly crave funyuns.

    1. Opus the Poet

      Me, too. But I have been craving salty foods for several weeks now. 😛

      1. Just Cheeto Dust

        Damn, now I’m thinking about potato chip chocolate bars and chocolate-covered bacon.

        1. rachel

          I HAVE EATEN THOSE OH MY GOD HOORAY YES

          I think it’s honestly the picture on the packaging that makes me so.. so full of tears with longing. jesus. how… how did they do it

          can I watch a video

          don’t mind me guise

      2. WaveRocker

        Sodium levels low? You must be really relaxed. Try getting frustrated at something

        1. Opus the Poet

          You obviously don’t read my blog, do you?

        2. WaveRocker

          Well, no, but I was actually going for a joke there.

        3. N0083rP00F

          If laughter were measured in Scoville equivalent units of scale, that would be about a 100.

        4. Opus the Poet

          You mean logarithmically, on a scale of 0-3000000, that was a 100? Ohhh, sick burn dude.

        5. 3oranges

          Scoville units work better for burns anyway.

    2. arank11

      Great. Now I want Funyuns

    3. Plasma Mongoose

      “GIVE THEM TO ME!”

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4MsSk1V3u-E

      1. |Agent

        Wow. That’s hard core, yo.

    4. ocbrad1

      Everyone should have Funyuns. I wish they shipped them up here to Alberta. Canada has its sucky moments.

  4. Yotomoe

    Hahahahaha Friggin’ knew it!

    1. Drunken Nordmann

      By the way, did you ever draw the Dina/Faz spawn you wanted to draw last August. Just curious.

      1. Yotomoe

        http://i.imgur.com/jptbhRq.png
        Yes.
        I’m sure I posted this.

        1. Drunken Nordmann

          Didn’t find the link, so I didn’t know if you ever had drawn it.

          And: Awwwwwww.

  5. GoogerGeiger

    Aww, Billie’s been crying. Or she was awake all night wallowing in regret.

    1. Aria

      Or maybe she quit drinking to make it up to Ruth, and is finally detoxing!

      Hey, I can hope, can’t I?

      1. licoricepencil

        Sick-looking skin tone on Billie gives more credence to this theory methinks.

      2. GoogerGeiger

        You can, but I don’t think the withdrawal symptoms would’ve taken effect already.

      3. WaveRocker

        Unfortunately, I think the well-placed bottle implies the opposite :\
        (The bottle is either in Billie’s hoodie pocket or in her room awkwardly in view)

        1. GarethGillatt

          Is it a bottle or the door handle

        2. WaveRocker

          …
          but you see how I saw that, right?

        3. LJoL

          It’s clearly the door handle. Wave is just drunker than accused Billie of being.

      4. Heavensrun

        I think 50/50, she’s either hung over because depressed drunkenness, or she’s detoxing.

        1. John

          “Ruth won’t make out with me because of my drinking! (Which is totally not a problem btw.) Clearly I need to drink to get over this.”

          Yeah, sounds like Billie logic.

    2. Doctor_Who

      Or she’s hungover, but I like yours better.

    3. Yotomoe

      Or maybe it’s just early as shit cuz Joyce likes to do that.

      1. WaveRocker

        A very good point

  6. Doctor_Who

    I think all the female characters should start wearing hoodie dresses now.

    The males can all have pajama jeans.

    1. Porglezomp

      Or Walky can just take all the pajama jeans. Leaving everyone else… ?

      1. Oxyvolt

        Boxer-briefs.

        1. Oxyvolt

          Oh, Ethan. How convenient.

    2. NightmareWarden

      Sarah’s suggestion from the previous page speaks to me!
      Sarah: I think everyone should start wearing strap-ons; It’s the best option.

  7. LimeTH

    Not complaining. Billie’s cute with her hair down.

    1. Cholma

      Truth. Then again, I find most women are more attractive with their hair down. Every time they put it up, like for a Hollywood red carpet or other fancy night out, I’m all “No no no!”

      1. Animal

        Mrs. Animal has this crazy long, thick curly hair that comes down to mid-back. I can and do frequently just get lost in it. Whhooo.

  8. Plasma Mongoose

    Good move Billie, there is a limit on how many ponytailed characters you can have in a comic.

    1. saltchocolate

      Or a dorm.

  9. Glacirus

    The shadows of the drama remain…in the bags under Billie’s eyes.

    1. ninja_jesus

      Count the shadows…

      1. arank11

        “Hey, who turned out the lights?”

  10. NF

    Does anyone else think Billie looks like a half-Asian female Willis?

    1. Yotomoe

      Nope. Willis’ boobs wouldn’t be nearly that nice!

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Cue Willis’ post defending the awesomeness of his Rule 63 rack.

    2. WaveRocker

      You mean, in that she wears glasses and has dark hair?

  11. takashid

    Is there some significance to Billie letting her hair down that I’m forgetting?

    1. AJBulldis

      Just not wanting to match Joyce.

    2. Cattleprod

      Trying to look less like Joyce.

    3. AgentKeen

      Looking less like Joyce.

    4. Glacirus

      I think it’s just “Joyce is dressed too similarly…change now before she squeals ‘TWINS!'”

    5. Porglezomp

      She’s just trying to not look like Joyce.

    6. Yotomoe

      To look even more like Joyce.
      REBEL WITHOUT A CAUSE

    7. WaveRocker

      I actually think there might be. Like her stopping giving a fuck b/c depressed from Ruth troubs. Deeper: her life falling like her hair

    8. begbert2

      Okay, I’m going to bring a new angle on this: she’s trying not to have Joyce look like her.

      1. rachel

        THAT’S THE TICKET

        1. anonymous

          The Golden Ticket!

  12. brionl

    OK, what the fuck is up with the hoodie dresses?

    1. Kernanator

      They’re awesome?

    2. AJBulldis

      Not sure but I kinda want to get a hoodie.

    3. Plasma Mongoose

      Just don’t wear them in London, otherwise the Bobbies will bother you a lot more.

      1. WaveRocker

        Bobbie?

        1. Blue Dragon

          Peelers.

        2. Opus the Poet

          UK LEO. named for a 19th century London Police Chief Robert something or other. They were Bobbie’s Boys, then shortened to Bobbie’s, then the apostrophe was dropped (because there were a helluva lot of illiterates in 19th century London) and the entire force was called Bobbies. And why the hell am I teaching a history lesson at 0100? I’m going to bed.

        3. Blue Dragon

          “…derived from the British Home Secretary, Sir Robert Peel (Bobby being a nickname for Robert) the founder of the Metropolitan Police.”
          as quoted from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_slang_terms_for_police_officers

        4. Plasma Mongoose

          Bobbies: Slang for any British police officer wearing those helmets like the one below.

          http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/0/02/MetHelmet.png

      2. Andrew_C

        No-one calls the scum that anymore.

    4. Rani

      Willis saw some fan art of Billie that demonstrated that hoodie dresses are just better. He learned. He acted.

    5. begbert2

      They’re a race of alien symbiotes that have initiated their invasion.

  13. Mr. Random

    Depression

  14. hof1991

    If they touch there will be a Billie/anti-Billie explosion that will annihilate them both.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      or they will just gasp in surprise and faint, it could go either way.

    2. Yotomoe

      They’ll fuse into one. Jillie.

      1. Oxyvolt

        Sounds like that stupid movie where Jennifer Lopez is a lesbian-but-not-really.

      2. begbert2

        It’ll be fine as long as one of them kept the receipt.

  15. Kernanator

    HOODIE DRESSES FOR EVERYONE.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      But I don’t really have the legs for them anymore.

      Also, are you interested in a new happy Joyce with condom hat?

      http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=9sdvf6&s=8

      1. Yotomoe

        http://i.imgur.com/kRpdXqS.png
        Edited a strap in there.

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          Forgot about that bit… NIIICE!

        2. Kernanator

          Thank you, both of you! I’ll certainly keep this in mind, if nothing else.

          (I’m a little attached to Death Glare Joyce, but Happy Hoodie Dress Joyce is wonderful too.)

        3. Zababcd

          Of course, you can combine the two, but the death glare turns into something else without the mouth. http://imageshack.com/a/img513/2558/qzba.png

        4. Yotomoe

          What has science created? THE GREATEST JOYCE EVER.

        5. Drunken Nordmann

          She doesn’t look so much angry as – something else.

        6. Drunken Nordmann

          And naturally, I didn’t see that you already mentioned “something else”.

  16. Alex Stritar

    Love how perky Joyce continues to be in this sequence.

    1. Just Cheeto Dust

      Easier to do when Sal isn’t strangling you to start her morning.

      Actually, come to think of it, that was only a momentary setback.

    2. Bill

      It’s easy to be perky early in the morning when your mind is clear and your heart is pure.

      1. begbert2

        Are you suggesting that Billie’s massive hangover and guiltiness might be effecting her mood? Seems unlikely.

      2. Bill

        Just callin’ ’em as I see ’em….

      3. Opus the Poet

        Another synonym for “clear” is “empty”… Just sayin’

  17. rakketykid

    EMO Billie nothing bright shall stay

  18. MM

    Billie’s post-class plan: burn the dress.

  19. Leorale

    Billie was kicking it old school with that scrunchie.

  20. newllend

    Damn…..uh looking good there Billie (she looks like shit)

  21. Robert

    Um..with her hair down she kind of looks like Ruth

  22. Kerry

    This keeps happening.

    1. MM

      We are the Joyce. Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated…and it’ll be tons of fun!

  23. Bilfred

    Joyce is too cute. If you keep this up, Willis, heads will explode. There is only so much cuteness that can be drawn.

    1. Leonou

      The shields will hold as long as we don’t stuble on a Hoodi-dressed Dina.
      God help us if we ever do.

      1. Jack Finch

        It would be a day that would live in infamsqueeee!

  24. Emma

    Just saw a sweater dress in person for the first time today. Unfortunately it was romper short, so, too short. And she was only wearing tights underneath. Not cute.

  25. SilverArrowArtemis

    Ha. Gah ha. Gah hah hahaha! Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!! What, ya didn’t get no sleep, Billie?? Aha ha ha ha. Whew. But seriously, this is what happens when you lie and then try to rationalize yourself.

    You done Billie’d up, Billie.

  26. Idon'tcarenomore

    Never could figure out why school girls, or guys, old enough to dress themselves, walked around like a 2 year old with their sleeves hanging over their hands. Fold them back and get on with it. Not cute, just looks juvenile.

    Both Billie and Joyce look pretty good with reverse hairdo’s.

    1. phroggonalog

      because look at your name.

    2. Animal

      hairdo’s

      Never could figure out why people abuse apostrophes.

      1. begbert2

        Some say it’s ignorance or carelessness, but my theory is that people do it specifically to piss me off.

      2. Robin

        I hairdo, you hairdo, she hairdoes.

        1. Roborat

          More like hairdont.

        2. anonymous

          Apostrophe neglect!

        3. Roborat

          I had to honour the theme.

      3. xKiv

        It’s across the street from Lefty’s.

    3. Hylleddin

      The sleeves protect and warm our hands. (Gloves aren’t retractable)

  27. Shade

    So she thought Ethan might like it if she dressed like Billie?

  28. Kiggy

    And Joyce is like “^___^” all the time.

  29. Vince

    Dad-gum, Joyce is so darn cute with her hair up!

  30. LordHaw

    Cute as Joyce is, she’s entirely too chipper for the morning. I personally feel more like Bille right now 🙂

  31. BlackIo

    I’m just looking at Billie in that last panel and thinking “Cheer up, emo kid.”

  32. N0083rP00F

    Joyce is the Pink Twi’lek Jedi to Billie’s Dark Darth Vader.

    For there to be light, darkness there must also be.

  33. Aeron

    I finally figured out why Joyce’s new look seemed familiar. She’s slowly becoming Frankie from Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends.

    1. Glacirus

      …..O.O I see it! It’s breaking my mind, but I can see it!

  34. Elliot-Chatham

    Joyce’s sleeves.

    I can’t see her hands.

    1. Alex Stritar

      She’s going for the Numbuh 3 look.

    2. davidbreslin101

      They are deadly weapons now, under there.
      5 scalpel blades on each.

  35. Tempo

    Heh, Joyce looks like she’s being shaded in as the comic goes along. Panel two she’s flat with shadow, panel three there’s some shine, and panel four there’s underboob shadow.

    1. begbert2

      The scrunchy is actually glowing with an unearthly light – in panel 3 Billie tilts her head and allows some light to shine past, and in 4 it’s casting its holy light down upon them all.

  36. Cattleprod

    I had to go back through the archives because I couldn’t remember if Joyce and Billie went shopping together, which would presumably have been when they got the dresses.

    They did. In July and August 2012.

    Now I wanna know: did they buy them independently of each other, or was Joyce trying to copy Billie?

  37. Cragalanch

    Cragalanch was wrong. Billie did not drink herself into a coma

    1. RadtheCad

      Or she did, and this is all her drunken nightmare

  38. Felgraf

    Hypothesis: Billy is, indeed, detoxing. And going completely cold turkey.

    She will get DT’s (or other serious, dangerous alcoholic withdrawal issues) and need to be hospitalized, which will lead to Ruth feeling super guilty and blaming herself.

    Because DRAMA
    (Also because it does make sense plot wise?)

    1. arank11

      Dude! Don’t give Willis any ideas!

  39. Zeecapitan

    This is going to end badly for Joyce.

  40. Zeecapitan

    With Billy’s bad morning mood only foul could come to them.

  41. Charles Phipps

    Weird fact, I’d like to see Billy date Ken or one of the other not-yet-seen New Shortpacked characters.

Leave a Reply to Shade Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

*

*

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.