109

Re-employed
Posted on May 3, 2018 by David M Willis

109 thoughts on “Re-employed”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    It’s funny because it’s true!

    …

    *sob*

    (least interesting scenario: Bartender comes back and calls their bluff, Jason fesses up and points out it’s Walky’s prank, no harm done)

    1. Sporky

      It’s Walky!…’s prank

    2. LeslieBean4Shizzle

      Oh the arbitrary bullshit of being an adult. Oh the insane about of wading through bullshit that is arbitrary.

    3. Jack Spade

      Better solution:
      Real bartender comes back with Glazlo, who Wally convinces to hire Jason. Then Wally convinced Glazlo he’s 21, and drunken revelries continue.

      1. Pablo360

        Glalzo, proprietor of Glalzo’s Pizzaz and Sbuubs

        1. Knuf Wons

          Suburbs

  2. AnvilPro

    Really that’s the only way it could have ended

    1. foamy

      Top 10 Anime Betrayals!

  3. CleverTrousers

    Called it.

    1. Stu

      I just have to wonder whether Walky has any clue as to who Jason slept with, though.

      1. Freezer

        Nope, because Walky would’ve felt compelled to “defend his sister’s honor” (Because Walky) and Jason would’ve had to thrash him in self-defense. These things haven’t happened, so we know Walky doesn’t know.

        1. thejeff

          Not sure about that, but he would have reacted in some fashion.

          Jason’s hinted at it, but it seems Walky hasn’t caught on.

  4. Elliot

    This is so cute! I love Jason smiling.

    1. lilyliv

      I was just about to comment about that. That smile is adorable.

  5. Doctor_Who

    Jason will now charge Walky for the drinks he’s been giving him all day.

    1. Stephen Bierce

      And call for a ride to take him back to the dorms.

  6. BKC

    Jason must be really drunk if he’s using “bullshit” as an adjective and the word “adulting” in any context whatsoever.

    1. Daibhid C

      A friend of mine came up with a strong defence of the word “adulting”, since it indicates that being an adult something you have to actively be doing, not just a natural state of people over the age of [some arbitrary age between 15 and 25 depending on culture and context]. And, therefore, that there are times when, due to tiredness, disability or whatever, we might find ourselves unable to adult. As someone who’s been waiting for an autism diagnosis for years and doesn’t feel they can say “sorry, it’s my autism” until I get one, I quite like the idea of being able to say there are situations where I just can’t adult.

      I’m not sure Jason would agree, but I think he’s only using the word because he’s paraphrasing Walky.

      1. Needfuldoer

        Verbing weirds language.

    2. Jay

      Fun fact according to most word experts (yes that’s a thing) a word is a word the moment it is said, being in the dictionary means nothing to the validity of a word. As long as you have a meaning behind it it can be world.

  7. DailyBrad

    I wonder if Galasso will just roll with it. I hope so, since Jason looks like he might be taking Walky’s lifeline he tossed out for him.

    1. Reltzik

      Of course, given the tipping situation, Jason’s likely to earn the hate and ire of his newest coworker.

      …. and then end up hate-fucking her, because apparently that’s his thing.

      1. Reltzik

        ((Really, it’s been over 24 hours since her first appearance and she’s not in a ship yet? We’ve been SLACKING.))

    2. cbwroses

      He hired Becky pretty easily…

      1. DailyBrad

        He did, but that was due to firing someone literally right before that, creating an opening. Though, I suppose it’s possible they were still understaffed.

        1. NelC

          They’re obviously understaffed as of a few strips ago, as Barb was away for long enough for four or five customers to get served.

  8. Pablo360

    On the plus side, this means that once they sober uo they can have sex with no repercussions!

    (seriously though, this is happening right)

    1. Mordecai

      “And y’aren’t in charge of nobody you shouldn’t be bangin'”.

      “Then get out of my bar.”

      Not gonna lie, I took that in the wrong way.

    2. Derek

      Not gonna lie. I’m kinda shipping it. I image Jason being like that freaky lady from Futurama, going all “Dirty boy!” on Walky.

  9. newllend(henryvolt)

    I actually find this funny.

  10. Sionyx

    Because Jason doesn’t want to get UN-reemployed, Walky. And as an Official Employee, Jason must follow the rules. You DID notice what happened that time he didn’t, right?

  11. Passchendaele

    *gasp* Walky, get your disguise!

    1. Keulen

      Walky might not be old enough, but Reginald, Duke of Thingley is definitely of age to drink!

  12. Jay

    New book title: Life is Arbitrary and Bullshit

    1. JessWitt

      I like the full line. The title to end all titles.

    2. Bicycle Bill

      Agreed. It’s definitely an early front-runner.

      1. Pablo360

        The book is over halfway over but OK

  13. Keulen

    Adulting sucks.

  14. Reltzik

    Okay, but would he be more or less flexible for someone else exactly Walky’s age who came into his bar?

  15. WikiDreamer

    *golf claps for Walky’s true cleverness right here*
    You done good kid….now get out the man’s bar.

  16. Keulen

    Considering how much of a lightweight Walky is, I don’t think he needs more booze.

  17. Reltzik

    So this pretty much confirms that Jason HASN’T been fired from his TA gig.

    (Also, because Sal’s not a narc and all the administration has is Penny’s bullshit accusation.)

    1. thejeff

      How does it confirm anything like that?

      1. Reltzik

        Because he’s HAPPY this way. So it can’t happen.

        1. Agemegos

          Lack of a green card is going to stop him doing it.

        2. thejeff

          Fool! Galasso cares not for cards of any color. The bow-tied one has claimed the job. If he can hold it, it is his!

  18. Dylan

    Sorry Jason but you know what’s another arbitrary adulting rule? You need a license to be a bartender!

    1. Dylan

      Oh God I’m hipster Danny. This is the worst case scenario

      1. Reltzik

        Lemme point out that Mary is in the random Gravatar pool.

        1. dethtolldotmid

          *high pitched scream*

        2. Zatar

          Oh yeah I have memories of THAT fucking me up.

        3. 3oranges

          Mary was assigned to me for a while. And it’s funny, I wouldn’t write any differently than I do now, but I would read it back and it would seem like I was being much more hostile.

        4. Emperor Norton II

          Peter is in that pool as well.

          Meanwhile, Danny 2.0 with his rad ukulele skills to play some NIN songs with is one of the best things you can end up with.

        5. taekwondogirl

          This is the sort of thing that makes me curious to find out what I’d get stuck as. Not enough to go through the process of figuring out how to let it override my gravatar stuff.

    2. Dark_T_Zeratul

      Fortunately, in Indiana getting that license is as simple as paying $100 for a 3-hour online need course.

      1. Incomitatus

        Gah… that’s expensive. I mean, our course in Nevada is about as long and we have to take an exam in person, but it costs $20.

        1. vlademir1

          I’ll make you feel the exact opposite then. Here in Ohio, as I’ve been told by bartender friends, there isn’t a licensing requirement by law, even if many employers do still require the equivalent certification, and the class is about $10 for a online class which many employers are willing to cover the costs of, including allowing completion on the clock, because it helps cover their asses if the bartender messes up.

    3. PB

      [a href=”http://www.dumbingofage.com/2016/comic/book-7/01-glower-vacuum/references/”>Galasso does not require such things.

      1. PB

        Dammit

  19. Stellar

    Huh, Drunk Walky is quick on his feet.

  20. Stellar

    If life were meant to be fair and equitable we wouldn’t have Australian superhero movie stars,

  21. AgentKeen

    -laughcries-

  22. Garry

    Walky needs a bowtie. No man under 21 would dare put on a bowtie.

  23. K. Ivan Ruppert

    I mean…

    Dude ain’t wrong.

  24. cbwroses

    What do you know? Jason can teach!

  25. BenRG

    I figured that this would end with Jason dumping Walky one way or another. Now I know how it is going to work out.

  26. Poskie

    I do wonder if Galasso too will be swayed by the power of Jason’s bowtie and hire him?

    1. Eldritch Gentleman

      Anything is game at Galasso’s so probably yes XD

  27. Bagge

    Just a heads up Jason – it’s generally frowned upon for a bartender to boff his customers as well.

    1. Khno

      really? I must tell my bartender friends about it, the bartending, they might not doing it aptly.

    2. thejeff

      Really?
      I mean, not on the job and not by getting them drunk, but otherwise?
      Why not?

      1. Tgape

        My guess? Bartenders are frequently in a position to get a lot of compromising information about people, especially their most frequent customers. It’s easier to disallow all customer dating than it is to police the blackmail potential. Of course, the blackmail potential could take many other forms, including economic, or requiring a hookup with a non-customer that the customer is somehow associated with…

      2. Bagge

        Well, OK, frowned upon by me.

        The “not on the job” is what Jason failed with Sal as well.

        The “not by getting them drunk” puts you in a tricky situation as a bartender.

        Better wait until your day off, is all I’m saying.

        1. TemperaryObsessor

          By on the job do you mean at a time when Sal had reason to believe still he had a say in her grades? If so yes. Otherwise, what he did wrong was essentially ignoring strong hints that she had ulterior motives the first time and not extrapolating she’s mad that I had sex with her the first time I shouldn’t do it a second time the second time.

        2. thejeff

          Well, it was also “on the job” in the sense that it was during a time he was supposedly working. At least the second time – the first time their tutoring session may have been outside his normal office hours.

          And the thing he did wrong was banging a student at all.

        3. thejeff

          Okay, that makes sense.

          I was thinking more in the same kinds of terms as teacher-student relationships: You wouldn’t need to ban a partner from your bar or get someone else to serve them or anything like that.

  28. FacelessDeviant

    A bar with a 21 years drinking age that close to a college campus?
    Cant have a lot of customers, can they?

    1. JessWitt

      It’s also a pizza and sub restaurant.

      1. FacelessDeviant

        Ah yes, of course. That makes it clearer, thank you.
        That would make it work.

    2. timemonkey

      It’s not a bar, it’s a pizza place (and subs) that also includes a bar.

    3. thejeff

      “Oh, fake ID. You’re the only friend I’ll ever really need.”

    4. Pablo360

      Grad students are a thing. There are plenty of bars in Ann Arbor (home of the University of Michigan which I attend) too, and they also have a 21 year drinking age. Since ya know our country does. I have played several games at the university’s D&D club with what one might describe as an alcohol aficionado.

  29. Khyrin

    Now… when does Jason realize that he likely won’t be able to stay on his student visa as a Bartender?

    1. NOrAh

      Can he stay as a student?

      1. Kryss LaBryn

        Mixology 101.

    2. Tgape

      If he’s still a student, he can stay on his student visa. I’m not aware of any colleges that expel people as students because they were faculty and banging students. They just fire them as faculty. There is, after all, no rule precluding students banging other students. (Though, of course, age restrictions can apply – there’s no law that shields students who bang other students from laws that would apply if they weren’t students. This parenthetical comment brought to you by the autistic Internet lawyer association, of which I am not a member, nor am I a member of any bar in any standing, nor do I have any official legal training of any sort. I’m not a lawyer, I’m not your lawyer, and all that jazz.)

      1. Amanda

        If he’s still a student, he can’t work at the bar on a student visa. We don’t care who he’s banging, we just care if he’s working off-campus; he’s probably on an F-1 visa and you can’t work off-campus while on an F-1(or even J-1) visa. Unless there’s outstanding economic/financial circumstances, then they’ll cut him some slack and authorize permission.

        Working off-campus is a quick road to losing student status, and it’s a long and expensive af process to get back into status. (this comment brought to you by my job, where I tell students every day that no, you can’t drive for Uber or Lyft)

    3. ǝ snow ʍousɐ

      This is how Galasso recruits half of his employees

  30. gevouden

    I know Those are supposed to be drunk bubbles, but around Jason they look like bishonen sparkles .

    1. Nenja

      or dandruff.

    2. Bicycle Bill

      Since Jason’s ‘boozles’ (thank you, Berke Breathed) aren’t as large and pronounced as Walky’s, does that mean the alcohol he’s consumed is wearing off as he sobers up – or his natural tolerance is higher – and he’s no longer as affected by the booze as Walky is?

      1. geno

        I’d go with tolerance. Walky and Sal have zero tolerance, and thus are drunk by a sip of anything alcoholic. Jason on the other hand is the type of person to carry multiple flasks on his person.

        1. thejeff

          Though he’s apparently drunk much more – multiple flasks while Walky’s only had sips, so you’d think it would balance out.

          If Jason’s really drunk multiple flasks of tequila and is still this functional, he’s probably in Billie’s weight class as a drinker. 🙂

  31. Side One

    The TRUEST aof adult lessons.
    One that mankind itself seemingly has yet to fully learn.

  32. BenRG

    I’ve always thought that lesson #1 about humanity (as defined by Harry Harrison in ‘Bill the Galactic Hero’) is: “Every day is ‘Screw Your Buddy Day’.“

  33. Tana

    New Volume Title: Life is Arbitrary and Bullshit

    1. newllend(henryvolt)

      I vote for this title.

      1. Pablo360

        Pretty sure it’s gonna be “Up Here We Can Be Garbage”

  34. Kryss LaBryn

    And here’s why Jason is my favourite. 😀

  35. Cmd1095

    Jason, finally becoming a better teacher after being fired from being a teacher 😛

    1. newllend(henryvolt)

      All he needed to do was get fired and get drunk. Someone should tell every other state teacher they’re doing it wrong.

  36. Arawn

    Y’know… I seem to remember at this moment that Faz is unchaperoned inside a building full of people that seem incapable of sorting bullshit from reality. I know this isn’t about this strip but… Is this the start of something horrible?

    1. SpaceshipPilot

      By the time we get back to them, he’ll either be their king, or dead in a gutter.

      1. Pablo360

        Por que não os dois?

  37. ProjectXa3

    I have never seen Jason be more anime than in panels 3-4. Or anyone else in the dumbiverse, come to think of it.

    1. Pablo360

      That is the most generic use of anime as a descriptor I have ever heard, made worse by the fact that I’m not entirely sure what aspec of anime or kf Jason you’re referring to. I mean, hell; that’s a solidly western animation beat.

    2. Pablo360

      Oh, the sparkles. Nah, it just looks like he has dandruff.

  38. jothki

    Yep, Galasso is definitely going to love him.

  39. Jhon

    Table 6 still wants its margaritas.

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