189

Removed
Posted on May 11, 2019 by David M Willis
Folks, I'm in Canada!  Come see me at TCAF (Toronto Comic Arts Festival) in, you know, Toronto!  I'm at Table 248, Second Floor of the Toronto Reference Library.  I got books!  I got magnets!  I got prints!  I got the subways mapped out so I can visit that corner alley where Johnny Five was beaten half to death! my trip to canada funded in part by a grant from the greater columbus arts council

189 thoughts on “Removed”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    “then can I trust you with this cracked open closet door?”

    …

    WARNING A HUGE FEEL REPRESSED SECRET IS APPROACHING FAST

    1. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet

      Yes, I admit it. I am Batman.

      1. Yet_One_More_Idiot

        Yes, I admit it – I *am* an idiot! xD

      2. Batman

        No. I am batman

        1. Michelle J. Caboose

          I am Groot!

  2. ValdVin

    Trust her, Jocelyne.

    1. Terry

      But I think it’s a conversation they should have in person. Not over the phone.

      1. Axel

        Jocelyn has a car and hopefully can eat the cost of gas to drive there right this minute.

        1. Woomy

          Yes. For us. To see this drama unfold right now.

        2. chris2315

          Hahahaha, no. Not on a writer’s money she won’t.

        3. showler

          Really petty question, but do we actually know Jocelyne has a car?

        4. Jason

          I’m sure we’ve seen her driving after dropping off Becky and Joyce, so… not definitely but it’s been implied I think?

        5. thejeff

          Nope. Becky and Joyce dropped her off. Using the family car.

          She came up with the parents for Family weekend. She rode with John to the lunch with Joyce and got a ride back with them.

          She might have a car, but we haven’t seen it.

      2. chris2315

        Not always possible. They’re pretty far away and don’t see each other that often. Sometimes you really need to talk to someone, you need to share something with them or to have their emotional support, and they’re just not there, and it’s better to talk to them on the phone than not at all. In the process of wrestling with my own issues, I’ve had a lot of phone talks with my sisters who lived in another city, and it helped me a lot.

        1. Jim

          “REEEEACH out, reach out and touch someone! Reach out, call up and just say hi.” (old long distance commercial)

      3. BBCC

        It’s safer to have this conversation over the phone if you’re not 100% sure the other person won’t react badly. Unfortunately, violence and all sorts of other abusive reactions aren’t unheard of when coming out. Joyce being okay with Becky being gay doesn’t necessarily mean she’ll be okay with Jocelyne being trans. There’s plenty of people who are okay (or ‘okay’) with gay people and not trans people, and it’s sometimes different when its someone in your immediate family. If you tell someone over the phone, they can’t hit you, you can hang up if it gets bad and not answer if they call back, and it gives you time to lock the door if you think they might come over.

        1. MatthewTheLucky

          I was going to say that’s ridiculous in this case, but then again even surprised flailing from Joyce would almost certainly be fatal to any human without Toedad levels of protective girth.

        2. BBCC

          Also, again, Joss has no way of knowing Joyce is cool about trans people – gay people, yes, but supporting one does not always equal support for the other. I doubt Joss is worried about physical violence with Joyce, but emotional violence like rejection is also easier to deal with on the phone – you can hang up.

        3. SillyGoose

          You made me cry again, BBCC. What a fucked up world.

        4. BBCC

          Sorry. 🙁

        5. Blank

          For now I find it even safer not to have the conversation at all. I don’t even think I’m being 100% honest with myself.
          I don’t think my religious parents are ready for a pan, trans atheist.

        6. thejeff

          I doubt it matters too much in this case. While the immediate emotional effect might be worse if she was there and couldn’t hang up, the real risk that she wouldn’t be willing to take if she doesn’t completely trust Joyce is that her parents would find out from Joyce and for that it doesn’t really matter how she tells her.

        7. TemperaryObsessor

          Actually I think in person might be a little safer from the telling the wrong person angle but means she’ll have to put up with Joyces growing pains on this issue.

        8. Emily

          What are the odds that Joyce even knows what being trans is? She seems to be the only person on the floor who doesn’t know about Carla, and while I’m not really sure it’s been explained *why* everyone else knows (is she out and proud? does she not pass well? did previous year students spread rumors? other reasons?) it makes me think the concept of a transgender person has never crossed Joyce’s mind before.

    2. 3oranges

      Joyce tries to be a good person, and as she learns what things she was taught were wrong, I think she should be trusted to try to do right instead. But it’s a long journey and one should not trust her to avoid the many mistakes on the way.

      1. chris2315

        To her credit, Joyce has a pretty great “doing the right thing” record, in spite of all the bullshit she was taught. While she may not initially have the most positive or supportive reaction, she’ll never actively try to hurt someone and she’ll ultimately be willing to learn and to question her prejudices.

        1. 3oranges

          Much to her credit! So how much you should trust her is a question of how much that initial not the most positive or supportive reaction matters to you.

        2. chris2315

          Pretty much. Joyce is probably not the best first person to tell when you have zero support network and you desperately and immediately need to talk to someone understanding, but you can also trust that she’ll come around eventually, and won’t do anything actively hurtful in the meantime.

        3. Chris Phoenix

          Would Jocelyne have zero support network, though? I mean, the Internet is a thing now, and we’ve seen she’s willing to tell people who aren’t her family (at least IIRC she told Ethan, yes?) So wouldn’t she have at least found emotional support online?

        4. chris2315

          Presumably yes, but the internet can only give you so much support. Online communities are a great help early on, when you’re just trying to figure out what’s going on with you and you need to know that there are people who know what you’re going through, that you’re not wrong for being who you are, and that there are things you can do to make it better.

          But when you’re past the point of accepting yourself and you already more or less know how transition is going to work, you’ve kind of hit the limit of what the internet can provide for you. Eventually, you reach a point where you need people in real life who actually know you and care about you. Online communities can still be fun places to hang in, but they can’t provide that.

        5. alice

          yes, this. and if jocelyne knows joyce well enough, she’ll understand this. but this also means she has a right to wait until a time when she can handle the possibly shitty initial reaction before the longer-term payoff of her learning to be supportive.

        6. begbert2

          Yes. You must first survive the initial Joyce Face.

        7. chris2315

          On second thought, don’t do it Joss, it’s too dangerous! It’s not worth the risks!

    3. Woomy

      Trusting Joyce to accept her is one thing, but if Jocelyn isn’t prepared for the whole family to know her secret, telling Joyce might not be wise. She could accidentally let something slip, or even decide Jocelyn should come out when she’s not ready and try to push her to come out.

      1. chris2315

        On the contrary, that’s the one thing I would absolutely trust Joyce on. She’s seen first hand the worst that can happen when an LGBT+ person is outed to an unsupportive family, and she is very much aware that her own family kinda sucks. Even if she herself doesn’t immediately understand, I think she’d know better than to out Jocelyne.

        1. alice

          i’m thinking of how her relationship went with ethan; she was really pushy about wanting him to come out. has she progressed on that since then?

        2. chris2315

          She was pushy, but I don’t recall her actually outing him to anyone either. Did she? No, really, I don’t know, that was a while ago and I don’t remember.

        3. Fart Captor

          Yeah she was persistent, but gentle. She encouraged him to come out but understood when he said he wasn’t ready

        4. Lone Duck

          The Christian metaphor is to be a shining city on a hill, not a covered lamp. Even though there are certainly times when a LGBT person might need to remain closeted (lack of support network, avoid conversion therapy, etc.) I think Joyce still things in that Christian framework. I think Joyce would be supportive, but need to learn on what effective trans support means. Joyce was willing to lie to her parents for Becky, so I think she will go the extra mile for Jocelyn.

        5. Lone Duck

          sigh…
          ^thinks, not “things” grumble grumble.

        6. thejeff

          I think she would too, but Jocelyne hasn’t seen as much of Joyce’s transformation as we have, so it’s a harder call for her.

          Plus everyone knows Joyce is a horrible liar, especially to authority figures, so even if she wanted to keep the secret, it might not be a good idea to let her know.

      2. DaveM

        Not to mention that Jocelyn would be dumping her problems onto her little sister (who she knows has been through some major issues). I wouldn’t blame Jocelyn at all for thinking “I shouldn’t drag Joyce into this right now. She’s been through a lot, and this is my issue, I’m the older one, it’s not fair to her.” In a happier universe Joyce would discover Carla was trans (NB: does she know?) and Carla would explain things. Unfortunately: (a) That’s not really how Carla rolls, and (b) The Willis doesn’t do Disney plot resolutions.

        1. Needfuldoer

          Joyce knows Carla gets her own room “for some reason”, but I don’t think she knows Carla’s trans. She might just assume it’s because Carla’s parents are rich., or something like that.

      3. Daisy

        Let’s also bear in mind that Joyce, as pretty much everyone knows, is an AWFUL liar, and expecting her to be completely normal around their parents after learning she has a sister is, perhaps, too much to hope for at this point. Certainly I can see that it would put Jocelyne off for now.

    4. woobie

      Maybe don’t put this on your younger sister who is barely coping with her last few weeks? Right now, it’s be there for Joyce.

  3. Regalli

    *Hugs these girls*

    1. Regalli

      Also, ‘that’s – huh.’ Jocelyne definitely didn’t know Hank’s been changing. Now I hope Hank actually lives up to that when the time comes.

      1. DailyBrad

        Hopefully. Hank cited Joyce’s courage in standing up to him to defend Dorothy as making an impact on him, so I have to wonder.

      2. huttj509

        Given what we’ve seen of Hank, I can picture him being caught off guard. I can see him saying something *really* stupid/rude. I can also see that being a knee-jerk reaction to something new, and he then becomes more recognizing of “it is what it is.”

        1. thejeff

          Yeah, Hank is like Joyce in some ways. Just even more set in his ways. His instincts are good.
          Jocelyne coming out to him would be ugly. He’d react badly.
          I think they’d be able to reconcile in the end, but it would take time.

  4. Electriccombines

    Oh man please let Joyce be cool
    Please Willis
    PlEASE

    1. Doctor_Who

      Hey, if the leather jacket didn’t do it…

      Kidding. I hope Joyce will be happy to have a sister.

      1. thejeff

        Joyce always wanted a sister.

    2. Reltzik

      Please give us another Joyce face and THEN have her be cool after about 30 seconds of silent visual freakout that doesn’t hurt Jocelyne because she can’t see it.

  5. Solenoid

    This conversation is happening quite a bit sooner than I thought! Don’t mess this up, Joyce!

  6. William Leonard Reese Jr.

    . . . . . This can lead to possibly the best possible thing or the worst possible thing. I desperately hope that it is the former.

    1. ǝ snow ʍousɐ

      I don’t think it’ll be the worst possible thing, but Joyce might need a little time to think about it.

  7. Kay

    These girls. ;;

  8. Nono

    Oof, I think using ‘Josh’ stayed the confession.

    1. Jess

      Or maybe provided a good opening for it (“well, actually, about that…”)! I hope tomorrow will tell.

    2. CF

      i think it could urge it. “here’s someone who wants to be trustworthy, using the wrong name, because i havent told her”

      1. Tan

        This is what I am hoping as well

    3. Rosicrucian

      Joyce doesn’t know she’s doing it, though.

      1. SillyGoose

        “So about that, I don’t use ‘Josh’ anymore. It just doesn’t work.
        -How do you mean?
        -It’s just not me.
        -Huh? That’s weird. OK so what should I call you?
        -…
        – Hmm?
        -….Jo.”

        1. Needfuldoer

          Or maybe just push “Joss” for now. One step at a time.

          “What, like the writer?”
          “… Yeah, like the writer.”
          *shocked Joyce face* “Have you been watching Buffy?!”

        2. ǝ snow ʍousɐ

          XD

  9. BBCC

    Oh, Joss, honey.

  10. Stephen Bierce

    I don’t ask for much–I only want TRUST
    And you know It Don’t Come Easy    –Ringo Starr

    1. Chris Phoenix

      Cues up “A Matter of Trust” by Billy Joel on the hacked jukebox.

      1. Deanatay

        Adds DRAMA’s Dead and Gone to the queue

  11. Tan

    Jocelyne is truly killing it with the beat panels.

    1. Woomy

      She knows

      1. BassBone

        Can she… can she see us?

        1. Thursday Violist

          Yes.

          That’s why her eyes are so blue.

        2. Tan

          So if Mike hears us, and Jocelyne sees us… I am afraid to ask who ‘does’ us.

        3. Needfuldoer

          Depends on whether you have (or want) a nickel.

  12. Moon

    Maybe I’m super projecting but it must be weird and painful for Jocelyne to be in the closet while also having a younger sister that looks a lot like her. It’s like looking into an alternate universe where you are cis or had supportive parents.

    Anyway I hope things turn out fine ?

    1. TemperaryObsessor

      Plus they practically have the same name.

      1. FLUFFYWOLF

        …I’m no expert but I’m like 90% sure Moon isn’t projecting and that’d be like crazy painful to watch.

      2. Schpoonman

        I believe canon is that Joyce’s name was directly inspired by baby!Jocelyne’s name for herself (Patreon when Carol was pregnant with Joyce). Joyce is literally named in a fashion after Jocelyne. I hope that becomes a bonding moment for them.

    2. ian livs

      As a trans guy with a cis younger brother–we used to look a lot alike until puberty, at least, and now that I present less feminine we sorta do again–it’s *totally* weird and painful tbh.

    3. Catman

      My twin sister and I have a running joke, whenever someone is surprised we’re twins, we respond with “Yeah, couldn’t you tell? We’re identical.”

      While I love the joke, it also hurts since the whole premise is “Ha ha, ones of us is a girl and the other’s a stinky boy.”

      1. Chris Phoenix

        Now I’m thinking about Clinton and Claire in QC. My headcanon is that they’re identical twins. (Claire is trans, so it’s quite possible AFAIK.)

        1. Daisy

          It’s been explicitly stated that they’re not, I think because so many people thought what you do! Claire is three years older than Clinton.

  13. Kravis

    And I want to be Batman, Joyce.

    We can’t always get what we want, sugah

    1. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet

      Yeah, but you’re the Blue Beetle. That’s a hell of a lot closer to Batman than most of us ever get to be.

  14. Thores

    I feel like the subtext of Jocelyn asking Joyce if she trusts Hank is directly tied to the Patreon bonus strip featuring Jocelyn and Hank from a few months ago. She senses that Hank’s a supportive dad from that exchange, but still isn’t sure whether that’ll be null and void if/when he discovers the real her.

  15. DailyBrad

    Here’s hoping she can go from Josh to Joss in Joyce’s vernacular.

    I’m glad Joyce had seemingly good news for Jocelyne on the dad front, and as bitter a pill it is to swallow, I am glad Joyce is tempering herself some by recognizing that Ross obviously violated trust given to him. Then again, Joyce of now would never have trusted him, so she’s probably giving herself too little credit.

    1. Woomy

      Does Jocelyn like the nickname Joss, or is that something the fandom decided? Seems it would be too similar to Josh.

      1. Meagan

        good question, I wanna know the answer

      2. Zaidyer

        I learned that if I say “Joss” over the phone as being clearly short for “Jocelyne”, people will think it’s “Josh” because it sounds alike. One has to lean hard into changing the O sound from the more technically correct “ahh” to a very clear “awe”, as in “Jaw-ss”, and even then it’s 50/50.

        1. ShinyNeen

          Phones are weird. There’s just something about the slight change in voice quality over a phone connection that just absolutely fucks with how everything sounds. My voice reads as more feminine over the phone, which was real confusing in the years before I figured out I was trans let me tell ya.

          … Although I do get plenty of baffling misunderstandings in person, too. Anybody have any idea how “Fifty” sounds like “Twenty”?

        2. Needfuldoer

          It’s the limited dynamic range and exaggerated sibilance messing with pronunciation that does it.

        3. ShinyNeen

          Well, dang, there is an explanation. Thankee!

          Communication is hard >.>

        4. ǝ snow ʍousɐ

          Josh isn’t pronounced “Jaw-sh”?

  16. abysswatcher1993

    Jocelyne: “I have a secret to confess, Joyce.”
    Joyce: “Oh my possibly non existent god, is someone in our family a criminal?! Is it Jordan? Wait, I know, it’s John!”
    Jocelyne: “Joyce, no.”
    Joyce: “It makes sense. How else can he afford such a fancy car?”
    Jocelyne: “Okay, he is possibly a criminal, but that isn’t-”
    Joyce: “And I am sure he invented his fiance to cover up for some evil scheme in India.”
    Jocelyne: “Joyce!”

    1. FLUFFYWOLF

      INNER JOCELYNE: “I mean, she’s probably not _wrong_, but this is SO off the mark.”

  17. Newllend(henryvolt)

    Well she is getting there.

  18. Deadjolras

    “Accepted her, like… like a daughter.”

    I’m tearing up in the club right now.

    1. ShinyNeen

      It’s maddening! Savage teasing! For us and for Joss! AAAAAAAAAA- *Flips table*

      1. Catman

        Mooood

  19. Rabid Rabbit

    “You know, like Ethan. Who’s so trustworthy that you came out to him after only talking to him twice, even though he was still my closeted gay boyfriend at the time and he never had an opportunity to answer your pointed question about what he was doing dating me.”

    It recently struck me what a daring/foolhardy thing that was for Jocelyne to do. Sure, the fact that Ethan was (as far as Jocelyne could tell) lying to Joyce about his sexual orientation might imply he’d keep her secret too, but “I’m dating your sister while pretending to be straight even though I know I’m not and hitting on her cute brothers [as far as I know] at the first opportunity” isn’t really a good look. And yet Jocelyne told him anyway. It almost makes me wonder if she has a self-destructive side, or was hoping her secret might spread without her actually having to do the coming-out herself.

    1. joyfulldreams

      Seems to me she’s just in the process of coming out, and prefers to be as out as possible with nearly everyone EXCEPT her family, because she depends on them financially and has zero (up until now) reason to expect them to be cool with it.

      She doesn’t live with their parents, so she can be as out as she feels like to her neighbors and personal friends, for example. And even if Ethan wasn’t a great guy or whatever, he was still apparently queer in some way and NOT a member of her family, and therefor there’s no real reason NOT to just casually let Ethan know who she is, if the only person who might possibly find out is Joyce on accident, who probably wouldn’t really get it and certainly wouldn’t immediately tell-tale on their parents or anything.

      Just a thought tho.

      1. FLUFFYWOLF

        Plus, taking that into account Ethan was probably the first and/or only queer person Jocelyne had to look to for support in-person in God only knows how long.

        I know I cherish the very few opportunities I have to open up about that sort of thing.

    2. Pl0x

      Jocelyne strikes me as a compassionate person. I think she recognized Ethan as a closeted individual, struggling with their identity. Maybe she used to be like that when she was younger, or knows someone like that.

    3. thejeff

      Partly it was just necessary on the meta-level to get her out to us.

    4. ShinyNeen

      I can’t speak for anybody else’s experiences with being in the closet, but for me coming out to people always feels like a risk, no matter how well I know them. I figure that you never know for sure before you do it. Hell, sometimes I don’t know for sure even after I do it. Building on what joyfulldreams said, sometimes you just want to be out.

  20. Hazel

    Oof, that last panel. The hope and fear on Jocelyne’s face. And…disappointment at being called Josh? Guilt over not telling Joyce the truth? Poor anguished, ramen-eating lass.

    1. Catman

      You mind if I steal “Poor anguished, ramen-eating lass” for general use?

  21. Annika

    I think Joyce would take it okay, even if she didn’t understand right away (does she even know about trans people yet?). I hope Jocelyne tells her.

    1. JessWitt

      Probably not. She doesn’t know about Carla either and oof, that interaction’s gonna be rough.

    2. Axel

      I think the only case of transness being mentioned in front of Joyce was regarding Jacob’s brother’s job

  22. JessWitt

    If only Becky was there to help nuke Jocelyne’s closet to Joyce.

    1. FLUFFYWOLF

      …I don’t think that’s a good idea.

      1. JessWitt

        Well I meant as an in-between, like Jocelyne tells Becky and she tells Joyce.

        But yeah I thought it over and nah, not the best idea.

  23. Meta

    Go for it jocyleneeeee
    And be good sister Joyce

  24. Cholma

    Alt-Text: “never trust a toe”
    Me: “Not even Sergeant Hulka, the company’s Big Toe? Who *are* you, Alt-Text, FRANCIS?!”

  25. Ryek Hvek

    Malaya up there on the TCAF images, with her helmet-hair coiffure, is an inadvertant visual echo to none other than the elder statesman of color TV cartoons, Colonel Bleep, whose mouth was often rather improbably delineated.

    1. Schpoonman

      She makes me think of Stitch of Lilo & Stitch fame.

      1. Ryek Hvek

        was Stitch a member of the Interplanetary Space Command?

  26. TemperaryObsessor

    I like how Joycelyn picked up on the fact that Joyce asked if mom was a good person and not if their parents were good people, and is now sort of using Joyce to feel out how safe dad is.

    1. Liliet

      Jocelyne, not Joycelyne, that’s far too many y’s for one name 0.0

      1. Liliet

        ….and I made a typo too, of course

        1. ǝ snow ʍousɐ

          well, at least it was a typo of the typo, not a typo of the real spelling!

    2. thejeff

      Yeah, that struck me as well. Jocelyne knew nothing of Hank’s talks with Joyce and has little reason to think he’s been changing.

  27. Reltzik

    …. dammit, I am not in Jocelyne’s position, I do not know her life, it is not my place to recommend that she give Joyce a bunch of PFLAG material (you know, so she can learn how to be a trustworthy ally) before coming out herself.

  28. FLUFFYWOLF

    Lots of complex feels here! Let’s run em through:
    Panel 2: Iiiii’m no expert, but I detect a little surprise and perhaps some uncertainty here. Like “he’s more reliable than a lot of the people we thought we’d trust our whole lives and are both afraid to admit we can’t trust anymore, but I don’t know how trustworthy he actually is.”
    (that one got long)

    Also “like a daughter.” Ouch, Joyce. You stabbed your sister right in the feels.

    Panel 3: The uncertainty is…. a lot more obvious this time. “What, really?” But there’s something else – I’m suspecting Jocelyn still doesn’t trust her dad enough (a reasonable precaution) and she’s weighing the possibility of whether or not this is false hope.

    Panel 5: I was gonna say that she “knows she isn’t,” but that’s not true, I think – I don’t think Joyce knows if she is. Which is totally different. She’s tripped over a lot of her own bigotry so far and I don’t think she knows where she stands on a lot of this.

    Also there’s a lot of baggage in this – “I want to be someone people can trust, ??????? ?? ???? ?????? ?? ???? ????’?.”

    Panel 6: “I want to trust her, but… can I?”
    –Jocelyne

    1. Catman

      I find it interesting where Willis put the emphasis in Joyce’s statement. By putting it on trust as opposed to can, it seems more authoritive, like she realises she hasn’t been and is endeavoring to change that.

  29. Catman

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

    1. Megan

      yeah same

      1. ShinyNeen

        hard same >.>

  30. ian livs

    Oh geez, I’m so tense. Is she gonna tell Joyce? And if so, how will she take it? I know I’ve said she’ll undoubtedly take it better now than she would’ve at the start of the semester, but it’s still gonna come as a huge shock. I really hope she’ll take it well.

    (Also, Jocelyne asking for Joyce’s read on their dad broke something in me. Huge projection warning here, but I feel like she’s looking for any signs that her parents might not be as unaccepting if she came out as she’s worried they will be. I just wanna hug them both so bad after these last few days’ comics.)

    1. Rosicrucian

      It’s possible, but it’s also maybe “If I tell you something, are you going to tell Dad?”

      1. TheFlamingonator

        Hasnt Joyce shown that she can lie to her parents if necessary (think the whole becky thing, until toedad showed up and she called them afterwards)

  31. Xespera

    Oh geeze, these are killing me lately. I thought things might go here, oh geeze I hope things go alright

  32. Keulen

    I’m both looking forward to and worried about how Joyce might respond if Jocelyne tells Joyce.

  33. nlips

    Homosexuality was hard enough for Joyce to understand… Trans is even harder.

    Remember she has only been away from her family for a few weeks, and they spent a lifetime enforcing strict gender roles as inherently “good.”

    1. thejeff

      Yeah, plenty of people are okay with homosexuality, but fail hard on trans issues. Partly just that it’s less common, so they’re less exposed.

      It’s going to be hard for Joyce to accept. I don’t think Jocelyne is going to tell her here though. And that’s probably a good thing.

  34. TheFlamingonator

    Hank is abour to be the proud father of three daughters in a few years

    Oh yeah the whole trans thing is a bit of a hot topic… considering Hank and Carols favourite letter when voting

  35. MatsuoTanuki

    *strums acoustic guitar*

    Today’s the Macy’s Day parade…
    The night of the living dead is on its way
    With a credit report for duty call
    It’s a lifetime guarantee…
    Stuffed in a coffin, ten percent more free
    Red-light special at the mausoleum

    Give me something that I need…
    Satisfaction guaranteed to you
    What’s the consolation prize?
    Economy sized dreams of hope

    When I was a kid I thought…
    I wanted all the things that I haven’t got
    Oh, but I learned the hardest way
    Then I realized what it took…
    To tell the difference between thieves and crooks
    Lesson learned to me and you

    Give me something that I need…
    Satisfaction guaranteed
    ‘Cause I’m thinking ’bout a brand new hope
    The one I’ve never known
    ‘Cause now I know it’s all that I wanted

    What’s the consolation prize?
    Economy sized dreams of hope
    Give me something that I need…
    Satisfaction guaranteed
    Because I’m thinking ’bout a brand new hope
    The one I’ve never known
    And where it goes
    And I’m thinking ’bout the only road
    The one I’ve never known
    And where it goes

    And I’m thinking ’bout a brand new hope
    The one I’ve never known
    ‘Cause now I know it’s all that I wanted…

    1. TheGrammarLegionary

      Nice, I haven’t thought about that song in years… Beautiful.

  36. BenRG

    I think that poor Jocelyn is rapidly running out of things to say and even out of ideas about what to say to Joyce about how to approach her problems.

    I am wondering if what Joyce said about Hank may have set some wheels in motion on Jocelyn’s side, though.

  37. Bagge

    “So… is this how a case normally goes?”

    My client tried to make a brave smile, but I could see how scared she was. It’s easy to forget that no matter how routine for you, every game of hide-and-seek-with-guns is the first time for someone.

    “Pretty much,” I whispered, ducking under a partly fallen wooden beam in the vain hope of finding an unguarded way out from the abandoned building. No such luck.

    “So… you can get us out of here?”
    “Sure,” I lied .”Piece of cake. Nothing to worry about.” I dared a peak through the window, but the goon was still out there. Crap.

    “Apropos nothing,” I asked as casually as I dared. “That ‘Hank’ character we were supposed to meet, you trust him?” She gave me a suspicious look.
    “Have I reasons not to?”
    “Kid, let me tell you something. There are many excellent ways of getting killed in this line of business.”

    “…like tommyguns?” she asked with a surprisingly sharp wit. I nodded.

    “Sure. Or knowing too much. Or knowing to little. Or mouthing off to much… I might have a problem with that one… but nothing offs you as quickly as a knife in the back. from someone you trust.

    “But you want to trust him?” she asked, and I didn’t like the glint in those big blue eyes of her.
    “I need backup,” i spat, a bit more forceful than I had to. “We’re in a corner here.”
    “Are there no one else you could have called?” she asked, and my throat tightetened. “No one?”

    I was saved from trying to come up with a sarcastic answer by one of the goons taking an ax to the door. I desperately looked around, trying to figure out another option. As I did, she sided up to me and put her hand on mine.

    “I trust you,” she softly said. “I know you will get us out of here, and I know you will help with with my case, because” …don’tsayit-don’tsayit-don’tsayit… “you are a good person.”

    At that point my own eyes did something unbelievable soppy. I may have said something to the effect of ‘ngh?’, but when it comes to not-sarcasm I’m not known for my way with words.

    Stupid kid. She had to go there. That whole ‘trust’-thing. Trust is stupid. It’s soppy. It can get you killed… and there was nothing in the whole wide world I wished for more than being able to trust someone, the way this girl trusted me.

    Well, fudge it. Me and the kid had places to be, and these clowns were not going to stand in our way. It took the goon with the ask 30 seconds to get through the door and burst into the room, gun first, like the worlds least friendly room service.

    30 seconds is plenty of time.

    I know these mooks were not chosen for a notable surplus in the brain-department, but I was still taken aback when she actually fell for the old ‘shoot-the-mirror’-trick. As she realized her mistake she had also fallen for the – admittedly less subtle – ‘brick-in-a-sock-to-the-head”-trick, and me and the kid were off.

    The tommygun on the street started to bark as soon as the door opened, which was – of course – why we were nowhere near it. But it served as a nice distraction that kept the goon from watching her back.

    Just because I have trust issues doesn’t mean I’m completely without backup.

    “Perfect timing, as always, Miss Sakaki,” I said as me and the kid left the building. Miss Sakaki stood up from the unconscious goon, gave me a short nod and sauntered off. Never one for conversation, that one.

    “What happens now,” the client asked, still a bit shook up of us nearly getting shot, killed and ax-murdered. I smiled and put my arm around her shoulder.

    “Now it’s time for us to talk.”

    #JocelyneNoir

    1. Transgressingwaffle

      I love this! Thanks for taking the time to write it.

      1. Bagge

        Thanks. I have WAY too much fun not to 🙂

    2. Chris Phoenix

      This was really good. Not just borrowing the character, but tying your story back to the in-comic arc. Got me in the feels a bit. Thanks!

      1. Bagge

        Thanks so much. I have great fun writing these weird reflections of the strip proper. With more or less flights of fancy on the way.

    3. thejeff

      I’m assuming that Miss Sakaki is still the cat. 🙂

      1. Bagge

        At this point I honestly have no idea 🙂

    4. ShinyNeen

      And you write this over breakfast!? Damn impressive.

      Trust is tough : (

      1. Bagge

        Thanks. I eat long breakfasts 🙂

        Yup. And I didn’t even include the whammy from the strip itself, where Joycelyne aches to tell her little sister her biggest secret but doesn’t dare to.

        1. ShinyNeen

          Fair! That’d be, like, an entire update on it’s own anyway.

  38. Danielle

    oh joyce………

  39. Teddae

    oh man, i understand jocelyne’s situation so well as a trans person. my heart hurts for her

  40. Bagge

    Yes, yes, second panel. I get it. I had my misgivings about Hank but frankly he is THE BEST DAD. The “Father of the year” mug is on the way, it’s stuck in a complicated customs negotiation between EU and US regarding maximum tonnage on the Atlantic ocean.

    1. JBento

      Sierra’s dad is better. So is Dina’s, probably. And that’s just off the top of my head.

      1. thejeff

        Hank still has his problems, but he definitely gets the “Most Improved” award.

        1. Bagge

          No, that goes to Toedad.

          I’m not kidding. Him removing himself from Becky’s life is such a tremendous increase in parenting skills compared to BEING in Becky’s life that it overshadows even Hank’s growth.

        2. Bagge

          Of course “-A LOT +quite a bit” still ends up on minus.

      2. Bagge

        They are great, sure, but none of them have been tried like Hank.

        It would have been SO EASY for him to turn his back to the girl that practically grew up under his roof when church and father and the whole world declared her person-non-grata. His own wife, his own faith told him he should.

        But he didn’t.

        He took her in. He gave her a place by his table. He removed her from a bad situation, like Joyce said. He opened that joint bank account. (Note: He didn’t just give her a bunch of money and washed his hands – he accepted joint responsibility). In short – he accepted her like a daughter.

        “Yes Becky, Always.”

        1. BBCC

          I don’t think it’s fair to say Hank’s a better parent because he stopped being homophobic. That wouldn’t have been a test for Ryou, because he was never homophobic in the first place (that we saw). You had a greater starting point and maintained it.

          And not a parenting moment, but Geno stepped between a violent man and his daughter in defence of a total stranger.

        2. BBCC

          Like, if Carol wakes up tomorrow and make a 180 on her bullshit, that’s great. That doesn’t make her a better mothers than, say, Mrs. Rutten. Mrs. Rutten was consistently better. Carol changing from being a transphobic and homophobic fuckface would be great, but it’s bullshit to say it makes her a better mom because she was ‘tested’ by her transphobic bullshit because Mrs. Rutten, so far as we can tell, didn’t have a transphobia problem in the first place.

        3. Bagge

          Hey, hey, hey, hey.

          No slander against iguanas!

          I see your point, but I still think what Hank did was several steps beyond “not being a homophobe”. That joint bank-account thing and what it symbolizes is HUGE.

        4. BBCC

          Fair point. I’m sorry, Fuckface. You’re cool.

          And yeah, the bank account thing is genuinely really good of Hank. I’m not saying he’s not a good parent – there’s even arguments you could make for him being the best dad. I’m just not a fan of ‘well, he turned around after he was tested’ being one of them. The reason why Ryou or Mr. Rutten or whoever weren’t tested that way is because, from what we can tell, that was never a test for them in the first place because they were never homophobic or transphobic jerks. From a child’s well-being standpoint, not being a jerk in the first place is a lot better than having had damaging beliefs and changing them. The latter is good, but it still comes with making up for the prior damage done from said beliefs (which Hank has started to, imo).

        5. JBento

          Hank wasn’t tried. “Dude switches from a stance that makes him suffer 0 and other people a lot into a stance that makes him suffer still 0 and other people not” isn’t a trial, it’s the minimum amount off decency that you should show not to be berated on a permanent basis.

        6. daredaemon

          In an ideal world it wouldn’t be a trial.

          But standing up against something you’ve been told to believe, which your community still believes, which even your spouse still believes? All of them telling you it’s important to believe that?

          That’s hard. Even if the belief itself is Evil, it’s still hard. Peer pressure is a big deal, and the community Joyce grew up in, the community her parents live in?

          That’s one that’s basically designed to optimize peer pressure and to produce the kind of evil people like Becky’s father. To that kind of community Becky’s father’s greatest failing is Becky being gay, not the awful, evil steps he took to try to force her in line.

          In an environment of evil, doing the right thing takes strength of character even if the act itself is so simple; because it involves resisting decades of indoctrination.

          I grew up in a community like that, and I still find myself reflexively agreeing with the evil shit I was taught.

      3. Bagge

        I’d also like to point out that the full extent of Dina’s father’s qualities as a parent as far as we have seen boils down to “stands around with a vacant expression” “has probably been involved in spotting Dina some money for a date” and (in a patreon strip) “is happy for his daughter when she gets a girlfriend.

        Great, sure! But it’s a bit of a low bar.

        1. JBento

          It’s still a higher one than Hank has set. The only reason why HE’s not on the bottom three is that parent shittiness in DoA reaches levels that could fertilise the entire world’s crops, ten times over, for ETERNITY.

        2. JBento

          I mean, Hank’s LEVEL with Joe’s dad, AT BEST. That’s not a ringing endorsement or, at least, a ringing endorsement of anything good.

          As a sidenote, “ringing” is a hard word to stop typing, I was on my third -ing by the time I noticed. Like banananananana.

  41. Bagge

    That whole “Accepted her like a daughter” line might have touched a nerve…

  42. goggleman64

    I only just realized they’re having a therapy session. They’re even in the classic poses, Joyce reclined and Jocelyne sitting.

    1. Bagge

      Oooooh! Well spotted.

      But in that case, they should have switched position for this strip.

  43. Yumi

    Anyone else going to/at TCAF? Gonna get some comics. Gonna see a Willis.

  44. JohnnyO

    Don’t trust a toe
    Never trust a toe
    Won’t trust a toe
    Cause a toe won’t trust me

  45. Seregiel

    :’( nooooooooo, my poor babies. :’(

  46. Sock_V

    The realization that your parents aren’t perfect is uncomfortable.
    The realization that they can’t always be trusted is painful.

    1. Bagge

      And Joyce’s judgement of Hank as a possibly good parent opens all those wounds fresh for Jocelyne. Is it worth risking everything by getting closer to him?

  47. Roger Sterling

    The problem isn’t that they aren’t trustworthy in the sense they are ever disingenuous-its precisely the opposite. They are terrifyingly amd uncompromisingly committed to the truth, even if it kills them. Or their progeny.

    1. Roger Sterling

      …not that I mind, its just highly ironic this particular name is getting paired with the Jocelyne icon, during this particular arc

  48. Bagge

    Re: Panel 4.

    Fudge you Toedad. Joyce trusted you and you betrayed that trust. You are a bad person and should feel bad.

    (And that whole gun-thing, or rejecting daughters-thing or mistaking dinosaurs for pokemen* didn’t help any either)

    *) That last bit added on behalf of Dina.

  49. Felian

    wait “never trust a toe“… is Joyce breaking her toe metaphorically connected to toe-dad? if so am i the first or last to notice? 😀

  50. Nelly Dreadful

    Mister Willis please temporarily lower the fourth wall so I can give Jocelyn a hug?

    1. Reltzik

      Cue plushy merch in 3… 2…

    2. ShinyNeen

      Let’s be real though. The moment that fourth wall goes down, half of the cast will never appear in-panel again. They’ll all be buried beneath a pile of readers hugging them!

  51. Bagge

    There are so many beautiful blue eyes in this comic

  52. Darkoneko

    noooo don’t say it don’t say it don’t say iiiiit

  53. Apostate

    Fuck, the unknowing deadnaming hurt me directly in the soul

  54. Elsendor

    sigh

  55. Rartorata

    Oh, Jocelyne…

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