and even if you do want to kiss them (because they’re hot), you can know that would be a bad idea for other reasons.
like, that they’re awful. hot, but awful.
Arianod
Unfortunately, that hasn’t stopped Leslie before. It hasn’t stopped anyone in this comic.
Red Hots, microwaved, sliced thin and added to Kraft Dinner.
Yumi
My main association with “Red Hots” is the cinnamon flavored candy, and let me tell you, trying to imagine that combination was a trip. I did get to the intended meaning eventually, I think.
Taffy
Those evil little pebbles in the tiny cardboard boxes, sold exclusively in big bags of assorted Halloween candies? They’re haunted.
Freddie!
Gotta crunch an entire handful at a time.
Taffy
Just commit maximum candy violence at all times.
Needfuldoer
This post is the perfect match for your current Robin gravatar.
Shadowsnail
Thin sliced and (USA) Kraft Mac & Cheese is awesome! My wife insists on throwing in a little extra shredded cheese as well (usually a Mexican blend).
Sort of same here. I used to love hotdogs as a kid, then grew to dislike them as a teenager and young adult, then found that I liked Nathan’s brand hotdogs as an older adult, and eventually settled on upgrading to actual smoked sausages.
Now it’s like, why settle for hotdogs when you can have smoked sausages? So far, Johnsonville Jalepeno Cheddar Smoked Sausages are my favorite go-to. I add additional jalapeno slices/diced jalapenos for extra flavor. Even started experimenting with topping the dogs with guacamole, which I was surprised to find actually worked very well and ended up a delight to eat. The only downside is how much sodium is in the whole thing.
I’m a big fan of those probably-artificially-red ones that we buy when visiting my grandparents in The Middle of Nowhere, Nebraska (not far from Sioux City). Not too picky about bun brands, just grill those– on, like, a grill– add some ketchup (mustard is optional) and I’m a happy camper.
I thought I hated hot dogs, but it turns out I just hate cheap great value buns. Great value bread & buns have vinegar or something. I never knew sandwich bread wasn’t supposed to be sour.
All my life I thought I hated sandwich bread. Nope, just the Walmart brand stuff. (I was raised in Arkansas so Walmart is the official sponsor of existence…. The Walmart art museum is actually really great though.
And more expensive hot dogs and buns are also good.
Fuck the grill, I ain’t classy. Microwave that noise on the bun, squirt ketchup in the vague direction of the cylinder, and that’s the end of the story.
GeekyWarrior
I’m now convinced you’re an AI that has found sentience. Nobody with actual taste buds has standards that **low**
Taffy
Growing up poor does things to a person. Like helping them get over their picky eating habits and just put something on their mouth to shut their stomach up.
Also post-War American food exists.
GeekyWarrior
I meant just microwaving the thing on the bun, opposed to microwaving the dog and then adding a bun. Nothing wrong with microwaving a dog, but doing it with the bun just adds sadness to the equation. You’re just dehydrating the bread.
Taffy
Fuck that bread, it knows what it did.
GeekyWarrior
Almost had a spit take with my coffee, hahahaha
Mano308gts
Replying here because the thread below reached the response limit.
@Taffy, yes, this entire conversation about hot dogs is snobby. Heck, it’s not even pretending otherwise; it has been predicated from the start on the idea that people don’t hate hot dogs, they just hate the cheap low-quality ones. By definition, there is an element of snobbery running through this conversation because it suggests that you just need to spend more on your food to have it taste good.
Now, that being said, I’ll throw my $0.02 on good hot dogs in the mix. You see, cheap hot dogs can taste good, but it highly depends on the brand. I particularly dislike some brands (especially one titled “Bar S”), while liking others. The same is true for hot dog buns- the cheap ones can be nasty, but the same cheap store brands can also be reasonably ok. Basically, if it tastes like sweetened flour paste, and not like bread, then it’s nasty. I can also get behind microwaving hot dogs, if I am in a hurry… Sure, it isn’t as good tasting, but it’s ok. Usually though, if I microwave them, I use a tortilla instead of a bun, and put some cheese and maybe salsa in there with them, or cheese, mustard, and potato chips (for the crunch). That’s tasty, cheap food. But for all that, there’s still the truth being acknowledged above- the more expensive ‘sausage’ style hot dogs are significantly better tasting than regular cheap hot dogs, as are more expensive buns. In the same line, grilling hot dogs tastes far better than microwaving them, and both of those methods are aeons superior to boiling hot dogs. Ergo, there is significant truth to the classicist statement that spending more money on food will make it taste better.
But microwaving on the bun means juices released by heat soak into the bun instead of whatever towel or napkin you use to protect the microwave platter.
Azhrei Vep
If you’re doing it with cheese it makes perfect sense, because now the cheese is melted all over the dog and into the bread, and that’s just lovely. Putting ketchup on it, however … eughghgh…
Taffy
I understand that it’s not a flavor everyone prefers, but the way people go on about it, you’d think folks were trying to deliberately create a nausea response to a completely harness flavor. It’s snobby, is what it is.
Bratwurst be the superior sausage, aye. Cook ’em right and they usually don’t neven need sauce (although a little barbecue doesn’t hurt). It goes on a bun if I can manage to exercise enough self-control not to just eat it right off a fork. The bun has not been a factor in over a year.
Pinkie
Now I’m hungry for sausage. Where I work they make the sausage in-house; the andouille is delicious, as is the Italian and linguica. Also the maple blueberry for breakfast.
Proxiehunter
Last time I had brats I simmered them in Victoria beer and sliced onions. Slapped them on buns with a little of the beery oniony sauce and a bit of brown mustard.
For some reason, I’ve always considered hot dogs a separate category from Brats and similar sausages. Also, as a former Chicagoan you can put anything on a hot dog, except ketchup.
Taffy
I’ll never understand the “no ketchup ever” thing. Even recovering Chicagoans stick to it?
nightshade
why use ketchup when there’s perfectly better bbq sauces out there
Taffy
Because I don’t want barbecue sauce, I want ketchup. Ketchup isn’t barbecue sauce, and it’s weird to assume that’s what anyone is going for when they use it. A barbecue hot dog sounds like a stomachache waiting to happen. Also fuck the concept of “better” sauce. Different, not “better”.
I really like andouille sausage or italian sausage. Those are my go-to meats when I want a hot dog. One is nice and spicy with some pepper taste, the other has fennel seed in it. I love fennel seed.
I pan-fry ’em so they get those nice char flavors and then I might add ketchup.
When I was young I always ate boiled hot dogs. I’m not a fan of the burned bits. Also limp bacon, which a lot of people can’t seem to understand.
Ketchup is okay, but mustard and relish can bun in Purgatory. (Not real mustard, the yellow slime.)
186 thoughts on “Rock-solid”
Ana Chronistic
to be fair hot dogs are a real attention-getter
Clif
“to be fair hot dogs are a real attention-getter”
Well, yeah, but so is Lucy Liu.
PirateTawnee
“A little from column A, a little from column B.”
Victor Riley
Lucy Liu always gets my attention, hells yeah.
Kaidah
Only woman ever to be named People magazine’s sexiest woman of the year twice. In 2003, and then again in 2063.
I’d like the 2003 model.
Taffy
Are you from the future?
Ana Chronistic
If she’s still sexiest woman in 2063, DAMN
Juanoku
In a good or bad way?
Whatever the case, definitely makes me hungry
Fnord
I thought Leslie wasn’t into sausage.
Chaucer59
Exactly.
Ana Chronistic
cucumbers get cats’ attention (in a bad way)
dang it, I’m used to reply being the only link
Doctor_Who
I mean, you KNOW Leslie watched Mystery Inc. and shipped Velma and Hot Dog Water, so I doubt smelling like hot dogs is a deal breaker for her.
Thag Simmons
Okay but just because you think two fictional characters should kiss doesn’t mean they’re both the sort of people you’d personally want to kiss
StClair
and even if you do want to kiss them (because they’re hot), you can know that would be a bad idea for other reasons.
like, that they’re awful. hot, but awful.
Arianod
Unfortunately, that hasn’t stopped Leslie before. It hasn’t stopped anyone in this comic.
John Campbell
“Hot but awful” actually appears to be Leslie’s type.
StClair
Unfortunately, yes.
Bathymetheus
There was a Northern Pikes song several years ago, of which the chorus contained the line:
“She ain’t pretty, she just looks that way.”
thejeff
Which is I guess the opposite of “I’m not bad, I’m just drawn that way”?
Taffy
Do you not use that as a criteria for shipping? Is that a weird thing to consider?
Thag Simmons
I think it’s pretty common criteria, just not universal
The Wellerman
I could sure use a hotdog myself right now. ?
Or some Peperami.
Which do you like more and how do you like ’em?
Doctor_Who
I used to hate hot dogs, but when I grew up I discovered that I just hate cheap crummy hot dogs.
Also, grill that shit, who wants boiled meat?
Yumi
This raises the important question of what kind of hot dogs Robin smells like.
The Wellerman
No idea, but how do you like to sauce yours?
Dunedon
Red Hots, microwaved, sliced thin and added to Kraft Dinner.
Yumi
My main association with “Red Hots” is the cinnamon flavored candy, and let me tell you, trying to imagine that combination was a trip. I did get to the intended meaning eventually, I think.
Taffy
Those evil little pebbles in the tiny cardboard boxes, sold exclusively in big bags of assorted Halloween candies? They’re haunted.
Freddie!
Gotta crunch an entire handful at a time.
Taffy
Just commit maximum candy violence at all times.
Needfuldoer
This post is the perfect match for your current Robin gravatar.
Shadowsnail
Thin sliced and (USA) Kraft Mac & Cheese is awesome! My wife insists on throwing in a little extra shredded cheese as well (usually a Mexican blend).
Arch
Sort of same here. I used to love hotdogs as a kid, then grew to dislike them as a teenager and young adult, then found that I liked Nathan’s brand hotdogs as an older adult, and eventually settled on upgrading to actual smoked sausages.
Now it’s like, why settle for hotdogs when you can have smoked sausages? So far, Johnsonville Jalepeno Cheddar Smoked Sausages are my favorite go-to. I add additional jalapeno slices/diced jalapenos for extra flavor. Even started experimenting with topping the dogs with guacamole, which I was surprised to find actually worked very well and ended up a delight to eat. The only downside is how much sodium is in the whole thing.
RassilonTDavros
I’m a big fan of those probably-artificially-red ones that we buy when visiting my grandparents in The Middle of Nowhere, Nebraska (not far from Sioux City). Not too picky about bun brands, just grill those– on, like, a grill– add some ketchup (mustard is optional) and I’m a happy camper.
Robbie
I thought I hated hot dogs, but it turns out I just hate cheap great value buns. Great value bread & buns have vinegar or something. I never knew sandwich bread wasn’t supposed to be sour.
All my life I thought I hated sandwich bread. Nope, just the Walmart brand stuff. (I was raised in Arkansas so Walmart is the official sponsor of existence…. The Walmart art museum is actually really great though.
And more expensive hot dogs and buns are also good.
The Wellerman
Funny, used to think that way about mustard itself, but next to “sour”-ish bread like that it tastes spicy and savory? I dunno. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Adam Black
kILLER bread has TV commercials now so …
If you toast a slice, you dont need a hot dog roll:
fold it diagonally , add condiment, Dog and roll it up
Its good bread
Taffy
Fuck the grill, I ain’t classy. Microwave that noise on the bun, squirt ketchup in the vague direction of the cylinder, and that’s the end of the story.
GeekyWarrior
I’m now convinced you’re an AI that has found sentience. Nobody with actual taste buds has standards that **low**
Taffy
Growing up poor does things to a person. Like helping them get over their picky eating habits and just put something on their mouth to shut their stomach up.
Also post-War American food exists.
GeekyWarrior
I meant just microwaving the thing on the bun, opposed to microwaving the dog and then adding a bun. Nothing wrong with microwaving a dog, but doing it with the bun just adds sadness to the equation. You’re just dehydrating the bread.
Taffy
Fuck that bread, it knows what it did.
GeekyWarrior
Almost had a spit take with my coffee, hahahaha
Mano308gts
Replying here because the thread below reached the response limit.
@Taffy, yes, this entire conversation about hot dogs is snobby. Heck, it’s not even pretending otherwise; it has been predicated from the start on the idea that people don’t hate hot dogs, they just hate the cheap low-quality ones. By definition, there is an element of snobbery running through this conversation because it suggests that you just need to spend more on your food to have it taste good.
Now, that being said, I’ll throw my $0.02 on good hot dogs in the mix. You see, cheap hot dogs can taste good, but it highly depends on the brand. I particularly dislike some brands (especially one titled “Bar S”), while liking others. The same is true for hot dog buns- the cheap ones can be nasty, but the same cheap store brands can also be reasonably ok. Basically, if it tastes like sweetened flour paste, and not like bread, then it’s nasty. I can also get behind microwaving hot dogs, if I am in a hurry… Sure, it isn’t as good tasting, but it’s ok. Usually though, if I microwave them, I use a tortilla instead of a bun, and put some cheese and maybe salsa in there with them, or cheese, mustard, and potato chips (for the crunch). That’s tasty, cheap food. But for all that, there’s still the truth being acknowledged above- the more expensive ‘sausage’ style hot dogs are significantly better tasting than regular cheap hot dogs, as are more expensive buns. In the same line, grilling hot dogs tastes far better than microwaving them, and both of those methods are aeons superior to boiling hot dogs. Ergo, there is significant truth to the classicist statement that spending more money on food will make it taste better.
Opus the Poet
But microwaving on the bun means juices released by heat soak into the bun instead of whatever towel or napkin you use to protect the microwave platter.
Azhrei Vep
If you’re doing it with cheese it makes perfect sense, because now the cheese is melted all over the dog and into the bread, and that’s just lovely. Putting ketchup on it, however … eughghgh…
Taffy
I understand that it’s not a flavor everyone prefers, but the way people go on about it, you’d think folks were trying to deliberately create a nausea response to a completely harness flavor. It’s snobby, is what it is.
butting
Grilled vs boiled vs strip the wires from a motel lamp, feed them through, and throw the switch, it’s a debate as old as time.
Needfuldoer
Grilled, griddled, or pan fried until the outside gets charred. Cut an X into each end first so they don’t puff up weird.
Everyone loves a good burnt weeny sandwich!
Ed Rhodes
Sometimes, you need the dog to be softer. Especially when you’re having a bad dentures fitting day. You’ll understand when you get older.
StClair
I’m okay with hot dogs, but I prefer other kinds of sausage(s) lately. Bratwurst on a bun, and as an ingredient, pepperoni or andouille or chorizo or…
Taffy
Bratwurst be the superior sausage, aye. Cook ’em right and they usually don’t neven need sauce (although a little barbecue doesn’t hurt). It goes on a bun if I can manage to exercise enough self-control not to just eat it right off a fork. The bun has not been a factor in over a year.
Pinkie
Now I’m hungry for sausage. Where I work they make the sausage in-house; the andouille is delicious, as is the Italian and linguica. Also the maple blueberry for breakfast.
Proxiehunter
Last time I had brats I simmered them in Victoria beer and sliced onions. Slapped them on buns with a little of the beery oniony sauce and a bit of brown mustard.
Taffy
….Marge, write that down.
Geneseepaws
Thuringer, curry wurst, weiss wurst, krakower, shashlik, Johnsonville, …
Ed Callahan
For some reason, I’ve always considered hot dogs a separate category from Brats and similar sausages. Also, as a former Chicagoan you can put anything on a hot dog, except ketchup.
Taffy
I’ll never understand the “no ketchup ever” thing. Even recovering Chicagoans stick to it?
nightshade
why use ketchup when there’s perfectly better bbq sauces out there
Taffy
Because I don’t want barbecue sauce, I want ketchup. Ketchup isn’t barbecue sauce, and it’s weird to assume that’s what anyone is going for when they use it. A barbecue hot dog sounds like a stomachache waiting to happen. Also fuck the concept of “better” sauce. Different, not “better”.
Nejireon
There’s a place called Wheeler’s Meat Market that makes hot dogs out of pepperonis and they’re called grillaronis.
egg egg
I really like andouille sausage or italian sausage. Those are my go-to meats when I want a hot dog. One is nice and spicy with some pepper taste, the other has fennel seed in it. I love fennel seed.
I pan-fry ’em so they get those nice char flavors and then I might add ketchup.
StClair
I approve, +1
Max
When I was young I always ate boiled hot dogs. I’m not a fan of the burned bits. Also limp bacon, which a lot of people can’t seem to understand.
Ketchup is okay, but mustard and relish can bun in Purgatory. (Not real mustard, the yellow slime.)
Taffy
Are you saying you like or dislike limp bacon? Personally, I prefer it nice and crispy, but a good firm semi-soft bacon strip is good on a sandwich.
Max
Limp bacon is the shizz. People ruin it when the they burn the crap out of it. I’m looking at you, mom.
Alex
I like vegan dogs with all the hotdog toppings because it turns out the toppings are the best part of a hotdog and I think meat is gross these days.
Taffy
Lots of very good Robin faces today. Ya love to see it.
Thag Simmons
Good Robin Faces happen whenever Robin’s in a comic, but these are pretty good ones
Kim
We sure do! <3
Yumi
Damn, Lucy Liu…
Cholma
To quote her character in Payback: “Hubba hubba.”
Nono