Secret nerd
Posted on February 9, 2020 by David M Willis

156 thoughts on “Secret nerd”

  1. Suet

    One of us! One of us! Billie’s a nerd! One of us!

    1. ktbear

      Wow, well done Suet. How’d you DO that??

      1. King Daniel

        Suet’s got chops.

      2. Suet

        Well, with all this Kit Fisto, I even forgot myself.

        Also, spacing out into next day while watching Freaks

    2. Mr D

      WE ACCEPT HER! WE ACCEPT HER
      GOOBLE GOBBLE GOOBLE GOBBLE!

      1. StClair

        someone with the rest of the ref, very nice.

  2. Nono

    That room transfer clerk is gonna have a visitor soon.

    1. clif

      Mike?

  3. Slartibeast Button, BIA

    Not to be confused with Jabba’s butler guy.

    1. Delicious Taffy

      That’s Clavicus Vile.

      1. LeslieBean4shizzle

        I would make some sort of snooty joke about you knowing the name of Jabba’s butler guy…
        BUT…
        Earlier this evening, I was talking to someone who’d seen the last two episodes of the Witcher on Netflix (at that point, I hadn’t) and they mentioned “the mage guy with a sword”
        And I was like “Vilgeforte’s in the show?!”

        1. MatthewTheLucky

          Your snooty joke would be ruined by the fact that his comment was intentionally wrong- Vile is a Daedric Prince from Elder Scrolls, not a Star Wars character.

        2. LeslieBean4shizzle

          Ha!
          Shows what I fuckin’ know about Star Wars. :p
          … or the Elder Scrolls for that matter.

      2. Regalli

        So the Jedi are followers of Jyggalag, right?

        1. King Daniel

          Jyggalag’s a little too absolute for most of the Jedi, I imagine.

        2. Lokitsu

          The final trilogy would have been 100% more awesome with Sheogorath in it.

        3. King Daniel

          Cheese for everyone! Wait, scratch that. Cheese for no one.

      3. RacingTurtle

        Freaked me out a little the first time I ran into his talking dog right outside Jabba’s palace, not gonna lie

        1. He Who Abides

          You mean Creeper, right?

        2. King Daniel

          Creeper, Barbas, they’re all the same.

        3. Reltzik

          It doesn’t really matter any more, since he got the axe.

        4. MatthewTheLucky

          That is objectively the wrong choice.

        5. Reltzik

          There’s a limited quest log, no ability to delete quests, and the dog quest gets stuck in your log without you getting a say in it unless you don’t ever want to go near that town ever and you get stuck with a companion in a dungeon which is always the worst-case scenario in that game. It’s the ONLY choice.

          … yes, I actually managed to run into a cap on how many quests could be in the journal.

        6. He Who Abides

          Um . . . I always thought having an essential companion that didn’t eat up either your companion or pet slot was a good thing?

          Then again, I played an Argonian Atromancer who wanted as many bodies around as lizardly (it’s a word, shut up) possible, so I might be biased on this one.

        7. Reltzik

          Given that every companion in the game is dead set on interposing itself between my enemies and my power attacks / arrows / firebolts at the worst possible moment? It’s definitely not.

        8. Reltzik

          … except casters like Esberen, who the ONE TIME I let my guard down around him participated in a fight against a dragon attacking a village. And by “participated” I mean he fireballed the dragon while it was grounded and half of Riverwood was clustered around it right where they would get hurt and agroed by the fireball.

          I hate the companion AI in that game so much…

        9. King Daniel

          Might just be a difference between the original and the Special Edition – or just different play styles, especially since I’m into roleplaying as my character – but I’m currently several hundred hours into the game myself (finally got the game myself several months back, after having been limited to vicariously living through Let’s Plays for years), and I haven’t had too much trouble with companions. Barbas was a little annoying, but not enough to be worth giving up the Masque for.

  4. King Daniel

    dorkuses

  5. DailyBrad

    Somewhere, Walky’s probably cracking such a big smile right about now.

    1. Doctor_Who

      Well yeah, he’s on verse 28 of Fleshballs, it’s the best verse.

  6. Stephen Bierce

    I got drunk the night my Jedi got out of Jabba’s
    And I had to go and find him in the sand
    But before I got to the Sarlacc in my land speeder–

    1. ValdVin

      It sounds like you may have written the perfect country and western sci-fi song.

      1. Abel Undercity

        It actually times out pretty well to The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia.

        1. Geneseepaws

          “Lives on a mountaintop on Tattooine.
          In his youth, he once rescued a queen.
          Trained Anakin when he was just a teen,
          but couldn’t stop him from becoming a machine.
          Obieeeeee-Wan Kenobieeee
          stinked up the vile frontier.“ **

          ** Not my work. Belongs to Luke Ski

  7. DailyBrad

    I bet Billie already has a lightsaber color picked out for herself, if pressed.

    1. BBCC

      Kit Fisto’s is green, I’m just saying. 😉

    2. Happilychaotic

      Billie: “There are no Star Wars nerds here” *does a Jedí hand wawe*

      1. Happilychaotic

        Oops, that was meant to be a reply for a comment below.

  8. Lily

    Strangely sweet

  9. ValdVin

    Not a nerd anymore? Billie, that’s not how it works.

    1. BBCC

      She’s in denial.

      1. BBCC

        “You’re posting too quickly. Slow down.”

        YoU’rE pOsTiNg ToO qUiCkLy. SlOw DoWn.

        You’re not my robot supervisor!

        1. ValdVin

          If I were you I’d take that as a challenge.

        2. BBCC

          IKR?

    2. Nono

      I mean, sometimes your passion for things just fade over time. I was a really big gamer when I was younger, and while I still like video games and will occasionally nerd out about them, I just don’t have the time or attention span to play them for days on end anymore.

      Similarly, sometimes you just realize you don’t like the stuff you used to anymore, or things have changed a lot in modern days if you’re into tech stuff.

      1. Needfuldoer

        That’s what retrocomputing is for! I still can’t get used to the new control panel in Windows 10 (thankfully the old one is still there), but I still know 90s Apple desktops inside and out.

        But yeah, I’m with you on gaming. The only new games I’ve gotten excited bout for the last fe years have been nostalgia trip cash-ins like the remastered Spyro and Crash Bandicoot games. (I wish they’d hurry up and release CTR: Nitro Fueled on PC…) I picked up a Vive, but mostly for racing and golf sims. But I did finally get a PS3 and Gran Turismo 5, and my soft modded PS2 keeps me busy.

        1. Deanatay

          GOG is my best place on the internets right now. Recently downloaded Sid Meier’s Alpha Centauri – ah, my youth.

      2. BBCC

        Sometimes, sure, but then she tries to pass it off as a joke, which makes me think it’s more denial.

    3. Deanatay

      Out of curiousity, ValdVin, why didn’t you use the frame with the stars in Lucy’s eyes? I mean, I guess Nash’s smile is a big plus for this one…

    4. Happilychaotic

      Billie: “There are no Star Wars nerds here” *does a Jedí hand wawe*

      1. BBCC

        I would have died and died happy.

        Which is why it didn’t happen – Willis is gonna kill us with misery.

  10. BBCC

    Too late, Billie. The jig was up as soon as you knew Kit’s name. Just knowing him might get a pass – lots of movies only people liked him. But knowing his name requires familiarity with either the Legends or the Disney EU and so. Yeah. Busted.

    And god I love all three of these kids.

    1. Regalli

      Billie has totally read 72k of slow burn courtly romance/pining fic involving Jedi angst and secret romance. It’s why she was so on board with secretly dating Ruth.

      This is canon now, you can’t convince me otherwise.

      1. Meagan

        I mean, one can get through 72k in a weekend if “necessary.” Even a day perhaps, if one is a high schooler with no other responsibilities.

      2. BBCC

        That’s literally just him and Aayla. They were both interested but well…Jedi. They called it off because of that but their relationship was considered very close and the fandom DEFINITELY has fic that would match that.

        1. MatthewTheLucky

          27 fics on Ao3, as of the time of this posting.

          (Yes, this is a challenge. Y’all know who you are.)

        2. BBCC

          Probably more on FF.Net. That’s the fic archive I hung out on at the time.

          …Shut up, I was 12.

        3. BBCC

          NVM, there’s only 23 there. I checked. At least, 23 with them as the main pair.

        4. Spriteless Girl

          Was that cartoon before or after the great porn purge?

        5. BBCC

          Started in 2008. So…unsure?

    2. Keulen

      Denying it by mentioning Wookieepedia makes it even more clear that Billie is a Star Wars nerd.

      1. Abel Undercity

        Wookieepedia was the final nail.

    3. Fire_Daws

      Meh, I was more of a fan of Luminara Unduli myself.

      1. BBCC

        I liked both of them.

  11. Passchendaele

    relationship over, too nerdy

  12. purblebirb

    Ruth’s smile is priceless

    1. Lokitsu

      Not true- Billie’s going to pay dearly.

      1. Yugnat

        Can agree to both of these comments.

  13. abysswatcher1993

    Everyone is a nerd of something even if they deny it. There’s sports nerds, anime nerds, art nerds, history nerds, philosophy nerds, economics nerds, science nerds, comic books nerds, tabletop games nerds, weapons nerds, animation nerds, etc.

    A person that isn’t a nerd of something would be a bland person, and there’s no human that has no interests, even if they try to be hipsters that pretend to be ironic instead of confesing they like stuff in a sincere way.

    1. abysswatcher1993

      Even someone who dislikes super hero movies would still be a nerd of classic cinema, and the most obnoxious cool kid would have watched every episode of Stranger Things.

    2. drs

      Some depressed and parent-type people I know seem a lot less nerdy, which is to say passionate about anything, than they used to be.

      1. Deanatay

        Is it possible to be a ‘parenting nerd’? From how some parents talk about ‘little tricks’ of diaper changing and tantrum management, I believe it must be a thing.

    3. LeslieBean4shizzle

      It’s funny you should mention “economics nerds”. That phrase was one of the base elements of one of my major romantic leads.

      The above makes more sense if you are aware that my non-day job is writing LGBT+poly romance novels. And that the protagonist of my main series is a bi woman whose main male romantic lead can be described as an economics nerd.

    4. BarerMender

      I still regard “nerd” as an insult and refuse to own it. I’m a history buff, thank you very much.

  14. GlaceEx

    They better not have Ruth break up with Billie after all this, I will be pissed.

    1. King Daniel

      Look, Ruth clearly says Billie is too much of a dork for her, the evidence is clear

    2. Needfuldoer

      99% sure Ruth’s just ribbing her.

  15. FaerwenofValenwood

    Lucy’s face in the last panel is a gift.

    1. Deanatay

      RUTH’s face in the last panel is a gift!

  16. Dara

    STORYTIME

    When I was in grad school at the University of Kentucky, I was working part-time at a couple of radio stations, neither of which were UK’s then-classical-music public radio station, WUKY.

    And that was a shame, of course, because to me this spells wookiee. But being too busy counting fruit fly genomes I never quite managed to make up an ID bumper riffing on that, much less get some friend to quietly insert it into the rotation without telling anyone so it would go on the air by surprise. But I did work out a few scripts, all of which went something like:

    [wookiee roar]

    [wookiee-like voice shouting] “WOOKIEE RADIO!”

    [Carrie Fisher] “Would somebody get this walking carpet out of my way?!”

    [Blaster SFX]

    [Announcer, for legal compliance] Ninety One Point Three F. M., W. U. K. Y. — Lexington.

    Not doing this is pretty much my only major regret from grad school.

    1. StClair

      I approve of this unrealized dream.

    2. Bicycle Bill

      Give ’em time … it will happen.

  17. Valerie

    I thought last strip’s “she left me” was a euphemism for Billie’s friend dying, but I guess not? Was this the friend that she dated, so she “left” her as in they broke up?

    1. RacingTurtle

      Yeah, it was probably Alice.

      1. Ron again

        It was definitely alice, but I’m not sure about breaking up as friends or lovers.

        Billie was rather surprised to be dating “a girl” (Ruth). I got the idea she only recently found out that she can be attracted to women. On the other hand, reading back now, Alice did mention she thought she “loved” Billie in this strip and Walky mentions drama as being sexually transmittable between the two…

        Any ideas?

        1. Ron again

          Messed up the tags again… I meant this strip.

        2. RowenMorland

          Probably the same setup she was doing with Ruth prior to having an actual date and having Becky underline it for her. She is just very “bi-the way” and didn’t count the physical and attraction stuff as dating a girl if it didn’t have romantic and/or social stuff explicitly tagged on.

        3. RowenMorland

          Also, I’m not going to try and tag it but Walky’s last panel comment a few strips later (dramahurricane) indicates he thinks Alice and Billie were sleeping together.

        4. thejeff

          I’m pretty sure that Alice was dating Billie while Billie was just having sex with her best friend. While taking her to parties to get blitzed and bang boys.

          Not exactly a healthy relationship.

        5. RowenMorland

          Very plausible with what we know.

        6. LeslieBean4shizzle

          Yeah.
          If two bi girls intend to bang boys together, it is much healthier to establish the relationship firmly first.

        7. BarerMender

          We knew early on Billie could go for women. Remember her drunkenly attempting to kiss Sal and falling on her face? Or her telling Joyce she’d rather swing with Walky’s sister than with Walky? Also, Becky mentioned to Billie she’d heard Billie had kissed a girl in high school and Billie didn’t deny it, but only wondered how Becky knew.

        8. thejeff

          Billie has some messed up ideas about it, likely tied to her cheerleader/status issues. She was long emphatic about not being queer or gay or bisexual. She’s normal, not like that. As the same time, she’s always been open about her attraction, she just passed it off as something everyone does.

          I doubt Alice liked that attitude much, but she was too besotted (and young) to object much.

    2. Paul McCubbrey

      Yeah. I’m like 99% sure it’s the girl she talked to before vomiting on Walky’s McNuggets.

  18. Tacos

    *ahem*… NERD!!!

    1. Lawzlo

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZVdR19E5mU

  19. JetstreamGW

    Hahahahah, suffer.

  20. Dana

    Uh oh, Lucy’s got a project. 🙂

  21. Bagge

    Ruth’s smiles continue to be the best things ever

  22. PB

    This whole strip is now my favorite thing ever.

  23. Icalasari

    Meanwhile, in the dumpster where Mike’s broken body was left…

    1. Lokitsu

      Who is this Mike you keep speaking of?

      1. Bicycle Bill

        “Who is this Mike of which you keep speaking?”
        Fixed it for you …. one should never end a sentence with a preposition.

        1. SuperZero

          of whom*

        2. SDGlyph

          Precisely the sort of pedantic nonsense up with which we should not put. 🙂

        3. Masumi

          *slow clap*

        4. BarerMender

          Someone once suggested we not end sentences with prepositions because they didn’t do it in Latin, and it became an iron-clad rule among people who don’t know all that much English. By which I mean high-school English teachers. Fuck em. End with prepositions. Split your infinitives. We don’t speak Latin here. And, yeah, I omit the apostrophe on “em” because there’s a good chance it’s not a contraction of “them” but a holdover from the OE “hem”.

      2. clif

        Ask your mom.

    2. Keulen

      I’m assuming Mike’s either in a hospital somewhere or he’s going to just show up with only a few minor cuts and bruises somehow.

      1. Agemegos

        I reckon that Mike has kidnapped the Evil Dads, and is holding them in durance in a dry well, probably in the basement of a derelict house.

      2. FacelessDeviant

        Or maybe unscathed, as it turns out HE really has super powers such as flight!
        And boning peoples moms.
        For a nickel.

        1. RowenMorland

          Mike is the only one with super powers, like Dr. Manhattan.

  24. Zatar

    SECRET NERD

  25. Josh Spicer

    This…this is adorable.

  26. He Who Abides

    Well, Billie, I’m pretty sure that Lucy’s up for a romance now if things don’t work out with Ruth.

    On an unrelated note, my facial stitches are out, and the DermaBond used to hold my scar together has started flaking off. Yay! I can chew (and talk) again!

    1. BarerMender

      Congrats. Glad you’re better.

      1. He Who Abides

        Thanks.

  27. Bicycle Bill

    Cheerleading (and the popularity/prestige one enjoyed because of it) fades over time, but nerd-dom lasts forever.  So let your nerd flag fly, high and proud!!

  28. clif

    Ruth is enjoying this way too much.

  29. Chaucer59

    Shitty comment, Ruth.

  30. BenRG

    I’m not sure if it’s legal for Ruth to be enjoying Billie’s dilemma this much. Still, she doesn’t mind; she loves all of her girlfriend, especially the nerdy bits!

  31. Arianod

    Who would have guessed that Billie’s fluster at being outed as a nerd would be the thing that would cure Ruth’s depression.

  32. Hazel

    Lucy’s joy is the best

    1. Hazel

      Billy’s nerdness was the mentos to Lucy’s joy cola, causing an explosion of pure happiness.

  33. Shane

    Correctly using two ee’s in “wookieepedia” in her speech bubble utterly sealed her fate.

    1. Lieutenant Dan

      Checking for the correct number of e’s in “Wookieepedia” sealed my fate.

      1. LeslieBean4shizzle

        **raises eyebrow**
        Is “sealing” one’s “fate” a new euphemism I’m unaware of?

  34. Reltzik

    I called Panel 5 Ruth.

    … I mean, I said it as a joke, but so did Ruth, so it still counts.

  35. Reltzik

    Three details I noticed about this sequence.

    1) Billie has not sworn any of these girls to secrecy.
    2) Lucy knows Walky and might want to gush to him.
    3) Run.

    1. DarkoNeko

      why wouldn’t Walky know about it ?

      1. Reltzik

        Maybe he does and maybe he doesn’t. Quite the dilemma. So let’s take the dilemma by the horns.

        If Walky DOESN’T know, and he finds out through Lucy? RUN.

        If Walky DOES know, he also knows a hundred other similar things. And will tell Lucy when prompted. RUN.

        Either way? RUN.

  36. Jay

    God this page made me hate her even more. Fucking personal space people

    1. Zee

      I was waiting for the comment that says this strip somehow confirms Lucy as the antichrist

      1. BarerMender

        Fuckin’ Lucy.

      2. clif

        Anyone with that much joy must be evil, right?

        On the other hand , college students don’t actually deserve personal space. Otherwise we wouldn’t cram them together into dorm rooms.

      3. Sam

        Physical affection out of joy and to which Billie herself is not protesting against is apparently a crime. Don’t ever touch or speak to anyone with actual joy in your heart because that is always guaranteed to be disrespectful and not even remotely up to individual preference that can be communicated with words and it is still disrespectful even when said person is not in fact doing anything to stop you or even acknowledging it as something bothering them. It is absolutely always a personal space invasion to even consider touching someone ever.

        1. BBCC

          I do think Billie looks uncomfortable and is trying to get her to stop by going into denial about actually being a nerd – but that could also just be her being uncomfortable someone’s actually acknowledging her as a nerd. Regardless, Lucy probably should let her go.

          It’s the same thing with Joyce – it’s sweetly intentioned and well meaning and it is cute but they do also have an issue with touching without consent and sometimes making people uncomfortable or annoying them.

        2. Sam

          Billie, to me, seems more uncomfortable with being verbally acknowledged as a nerd – she argues against what she says, but makes no physical movement to try to get her to let go and doesn’t tell her to let go either. Hell, in the last panel even, she tries to change topics, but still does nothing about the fact that Lucy seems to have quite literally koala-hugged her.

          Also, I even went back in strips to see if she had ever been touched by Joyce or Lucy and responded negatively based on the physical contact itself before and her negative reaction has again, mostly been in response to words she doesn’t want to hear. I don’t think she overly cares very much about physical contact and while it would partially be Lucy’s responsibility to pick up on if Billie didn’t want touched very obviously, it would also be Billie’s responsibility to communicate too.

          Like, I don’t think you always have to ask if it is okay to touch someone, you just have to also be aware enough to stop if it obviously makes them uncomfortable, and I don’t think Billie is uncomfortable from the contact so much as the emotional vulnerability that comes with accepting she is a nerd actually.

        3. BBCC

          I feel like Billie is uncomfortable to an extent with contact – like telling Joyce ‘leave some room for Jesus. A very FAT Jesus.’ She hasn’t said that to Lucy yet, but she and Lucy also don’t know each other very well yet, so I feel like, at least at the early point, Lucy should have asked ‘Are you cool with hugs?’. Especially since things like outright rejecting things like hugs can be hard. There’s a lot of cultural pressure not to do things like that.

      4. Jay

        O no, Lucy’s just too nice.

        I just really don’t like overly bubbly people.

  37. DarkoNeko

    sorry Ruth, Billie got a new girlfriend now

  38. Geneseepaws

    “I mean Wikipedia. Shit.”
    Pinpoint pupils. On the pupil, recently schooled. Don’t lie unless you can keep it up.

  39. Rabisch

    This means that Billie and Lucy cohabit is going to become good and with mutual respect?

    1. BenRG

      Possibly, in the long term. In the short term, Billie will have to deal with the fact that she lives with someone who knows some of her darkest secrets and doesn’t want to keep (or, indeed, sees the necessity of keeping) them secret. That will probably lead to lots of arguments and Lucy inadvertently and unknowingly making Billie feel very insecure and bitter.

    2. Deanatay

      Also, Billie may have to endure more gleeful Secret Nerd hugs from her new BFF5evah.

      Or, maybe just the one, lasting for a looooong time. Like, years.

      Seriously, Lucy’s not letting go.

  40. Sporky

    Easy on the glomping there, Lucy, this isn’t an anime con in 2005!

  41. SpaceshipPilot

    All I remember about Kit is that he had a droid named R6, and he had an apprentice who got murderized by General Grievous.

  42. Deanatay

    “Y-you can get off, now.”

    “NOPE! Sorry. Permanently attached, now.”

  43. ValdVin

    I remember comments in this space re “What is the measure of a nerd?”

    Welp, Kit Fisto seals it.

    I mean, I’ve seen less than half of the Star Wars movies, and even I know that the line is not “Luke, I am your father”.

  44. ziggy78eog

    You should have stopped at the DUI, Billie; now, there is no going back.

  45. Queezle

    that is actually kind of cute

  46. Merle

    At least Billie had great taste in characters to nerd out over. Kit Fisto is the coolest! (With the worst name)

  47. Leadsynth

    I know this has been going on for a few strips now, but I’m just here to say that Ruth wearing Billie’s shirt is a nice touch.

    1. Jay

      I never noticed that

    2. thejeff

      Ruth commented earlier about her shirt having vomit on it.

  48. Happilychaotic

    Aw, Lucy is so happy! 😀

    And it’s interesting how Billie is more comfortable with her self-loathing than with her nerdiness.

    Also, Ruth’s reaction is gold.

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