262

Sens
Posted on April 2, 2015 by David M Willis

262 thoughts on “Sens”

  1. Jen Aside

    Deathing of Billie

    1. Jen Aside

      Ruth’s kinda asking for it, though, admitting she’s the one Leafs fan

      1. Yet_One_More_Idiot

        My dad’s the same, supports an absolutely shitty football team (Sunderland) but woe betide anyone who suggests he switch allegiances…doubly so to the local rivals (Newcastle).

        The same is true of just about all sports fans all over the world.

        Although in this specific case, I see a highly possibility of this rapidly turning into another Slipshine moment. ;DDD

        1. David

          I think I’d get disowned if I expressed support for Sunderland…especially on the eve of the derby!

        2. overdosed

          to be honest i kinda freeked out about your comment becuase i know that feeling except my dad supports newcastle over sunderland but i dont know why they have such a big rivalry and cant just be friends. oh and i also freeked out about the fact you mentoined places in britain and newcastle

        3. Disloyal Subject

          In my admittedly limited experience, it’s largely for fun; rivalry can be a cathartic outlet for negative emotions. I’m a Giants fan, and I’m repulsed by the idea of supporting the Dodgers, but I wouldn’t dream of hurting someone over the rivalry. It gives both sides someone to cheerfully hate without it amounting to anything, so long as no one gets extra stupid and escalates.

        4. Disloyal Subject

          Switching allegiance carries the implication that you never really had any.

      2. L33tmaster

        but it wont be death, just great anger sex

        1. Disloyal Subject

          en.wikipedia.org/la_petit_mort

        2. Disloyal Subject

          Sod.
          en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Little_death

    2. LeslieBean4Shizzle

      Billie has interesting taste in foreplay, doesn’t she?

      1. Kris

        I think it’s working actually.

        1. Solenoid

          Fear is a closely related feeling to arousal, I once heard.

        2. Kris

          And anger or really any situation where emotions are high.

        3. Hank

          “Arousal” is actually just another word for “high emotion”. It’s an example of how a word comes to mean a specific case of itself.

        4. thebombzen

          I take it then, from your Gravatar, that Glasso is aroused?

        5. Bill

          Agitated, anyway.

        6. Fraser

          Arousal was just the raising of any thing feeling or not. Interest, curiosity, consciousness (as in from sleep, or a ponderous ‘zoned out state’), for border line examples.

        7. StClair

          Cue the epic hate(?)fuck. XD

        8. LittleMountain

          frustrationfuck, closely related, but less volatile.

        9. Deanatay

          Oh yeah, baby, your descending into inchoate rage really turns me on…
          S-S SENS GNNN MURDER RRRHH
          Autoerotic asphyxiation? That’s SO HOT! gkk…

          AKA Murderfuck

        10. Orbit Junkie

          It’s not “auto” erotic if someone else is doing it to you. It’s also probably not erotic if you’re dead by the end.

      2. 6Qubed

        This is what happens when both girls in the relationship are the tsundere. I apologize for speaking anime in my previous sentence.

        1. jpic89

          Better tsun than yan.

        2. Mr. Bulbmin

          Don’t knock a yandere till you’ve met one.
          Then, be very careful what you say, because there’s a good chance she’s listening.

          Seriously, though, stalkers are odd to have.

      3. nothri

        Dunno if your joking, but this is 100% true. This pair has discovered that antagonizing each other is a mutual and enormous turn on. See the slipshine (which incidentally is where my gravatar comes from, though the naughty bits have been carefully removed from view).

        1. DarkoNeko

          They may not wanna do that in Billie’s room, tho. Her roommate may come back in.

    3. Plasma Mongoose

      “Ruth: “You’re gonna get pucked!”

  2. Dr.Zeus

    Ha! Yes! Go Sens. Awesome. Love it.

    1. Opus the Poet

      Ah, memories. I remember when there were only two Canadian teams in the NHL, the Leafs and the Canadiens, now there are also the Senators, the Flames, and the Canucks…

      1. Vince

        you forgot the Jets

        1. Opus the Poet

          Knew I was forgetting somebody…

        2. Someone

          Ouch, the Oilers still don’t make the list…

        3. Idris

          They’ve been verboten ever since they gave Gretzky to the Yanks.

        4. Ryan

          I live in Edmonton, and we’ve forgotten the Oilers. Because the Oilers suck hard. And have sucked hard for a long time. Gretzky’s departure was the death of the team.

        5. shadowcell

          and the Oilers

      2. Dr.Zeus

        I’m lucky. Live in Ottawa, grew up in Ottawa and the Sens started playing when I was four so they’ve been my lifelong team. That being said I always root for the Canadian teams.

        Well ‘cept the Leafs obviously.

        1. Fraser

          You said Canadian, its silently understood that excludes Toronto.

    2. Bill

      What happened to the Edmonton Oilers (Gretzky’s team)?

      And Billie obviously knows jack about hockey.  Calling the Senators a winning team?  They’re the NHL version of the Minnesota Vikings — the only way either team is going to get into a championship game is if they buy tickets.

      1. Dr.Zeus

        Uh… granted they are not great right now but aside form the Canucks they are the last Canadian team to make it to the cup.

      2. Opus the Poet

        You mean the L.A. Kings? Or are we talking a different Gretzky?

        1. Bill

          Wayne Gretzky — played with Edmonton from 1979 – 1988 — before being traded to the Kings (and later finished his career with the Rangers).

        2. Opus the Poet

          Sorry, I forgot the snark tag /s

        3. Kryss LaBryn

          Yup. Caused a huuuuge outcry. I remember there being a semi-serious movement to get him declared a National Treasure so he couldn’t be traded to the Americans.

          I’m not sure Canada has fully forgiven him for heading south, although we’re a lot quieter and more resigned about it these days.

        4. Toes14

          Don’t forget the disasterous partial season in 96, when he came to St. Louis, costing us 3 players and 2 draft picks, never clicked with Brett Hull, and played horrific defense, giving away the series clinching goal that got us knocked out of the playoffs.

          (Yes, I’m still a little bitter about that.)

      3. A Scientist

        The Sens are alright, not great, not abysmal (have three extremely talented netminders, which is never a bad thing), but yeah, I was a bit taken aback by that selection, too, especially with the Habs not only being, probably, the Leafs’ biggest historical rival and also being very good most of the time.

        I know Willis doesn’t want to make it a period piece, but the Sens being good is in much bigger flux than the Habs being good.

        Even so, if that’s the biggest complaint I have about Willis’s storytelling (it is), I’m obviously enjoying the comic.

      4. Jordan

        Hey, the Vikings have gotten the Superbowl several times!!! We’ve just never won… Or been back in 38 years…

    3. Fraser

      SENS, totally not the #1 rival of the Leafs, nor a winning team.

      1. N0083rP00F

        .. and not a losing Team either …. the Leafs I mean … They fail at failure.
        Mind you they are backed by the two Media giants who don’t give a rodents hind quarters about them winning or losing as long as they have the Media rights tied up for the League.

        1. Roborat

          They could play to an empty arena, sell no tickets at all, and still be a hugely profitable team.

  3. SUGauthor

    They’re so cute when they’re flirting.

    1. newllend(henryvolt)

      Ya flirting , threatening and flirting.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Billie just wants to spend some time in Ruth’s “penalty box’.

        1. KingMabel

          Things will be smoothed over in about 10 minutes.

        2. KingMabel

          Things will be smoothed over in about 10 minutes.

        3. Solenoid

          10 minutes? That’s a bit short. One would think that college-age folk would have more stamina…

        4. KingMabel

          It has to be short. Sport-related anger sex can’t last too long or it becomes pure anger and less sex.

        5. Opus the Poet

          Plus it’s morning and those pancakes won’t eat themselves, eh?

        6. Disloyal Subject

          Stamina, we have, but we also have other stuff to take care of. One has to prioritize.

        7. Kryss LaBryn

          Ruth’s gonna Zamboni her.

        8. Charlie Spencer

          At first I thought you said “Ruth has Zamboni hair.” Then I tried to image what that would look like.

        9. StClair

          a flat-top, of course.

  4. Solenoid

    Sens-less antagonism. Billie’s just digging herself in deeper.

    1. Dr.Zeus

      She just can’t Leaf it alone.

      1. Someone

        She’s rubbing the oil of her routine in deep.

        1. Dr.Zeus

          It’s all part of their passion’s Flames.

      2. brumagem

        Yeah, leave it to Billy to Bruin everything.

        1. holiday_boi

          Come on, Ruth should be HABituated to Billy’s teasing by now.

        2. Fraser

          Billie should know Canucks are like Sharks when their teams pride is at stake. Conversation can be Jetting along; then Lightning strikes and you’re a sitting Duck in the path of an Avalanche.

        3. Fraser

          Billie is attracted to Ruth’s Predatory nature, and can be pretty Wild herself. Still that little Devil better watch Ruth’s mood like a Black Hawk or instead of being rocked like a Hurricane she will be seeing Stars with a case of the Blues.

      3. tigikay

        I’m bushed!

    2. Willoughby Chase

      Ruth is gonna to stick it to her real good.

      A slap-shot to the back of Bilie’s net! And Ruth scores!

      Out comes the Zamboni to smooth it all down. Ah.

      Anyone sensible follows the Canucks.

      1. Kryss LaBryn

        And then has a sensible reaction when they lose the Stanley Cup. 😉

        1. Willoughby Chase

          NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! 🙂

      2. Roborat

        Problem is, nobody sensible lives in B.C.

        1. Disloyal Subject

          I knew I liked that province for a reason.

  5. Plasma Mongoose

    Billie, you really should Leaf Ruth’s favourite team alone.

    1. Twirls

      heh

    2. Arikel

      That was uncalled for.

    3. Nono

      Maple they can come to an understanding.

    4. Clare

      oh my
      god
      this is the best thing that’s happened to me today, reading this

  6. Kamino Neko

    Good thing she didn’t suggest the Habs, or she’d have been out of the window before she finished the sentence…

  7. Urukak

    Billie should really know better than to make jokes about hockey to a canadian.

    1. N0083rP00F

      Yeah, the Leafs have that down to a T.

  8. airyu

    Ruth’s expressions here are some of my favourite.

  9. Safgaftsa

    Or Ruth could borrow Billie’s Femurs jersey.

    1. Urukak

      But Billie needs her Femurs to live!

      1. Safgaftsa

        Panel 4: Ruth’s face when she finally makes this connection.

  10. Aubri

    She’s just asking for a paddlin’.

  11. MarkusN

    Still teasing Josh?

    1. Gigafreak

      David Willis finished Avalon

      In his heart

      We won’t get to see it 🙁

  12. Kris

    And that’s the story of how Ruth went to jail!…She was later aquitted when evidence ruled the murder justified.

  13. TheOtherDibbler

    Somehow this is cute. I am sure this conversation should not be as cute as it is to me.

    1. Someone

      At a guess, she learned about a sport just to tease Ruth. Definitely cute.

  14. newllend(henryvolt)

    What are you going to do, Screw her to death?

    1. Mr. Bulbmin

      The weird part is that that’s a thing.
      Approximately eighty people experience “death by sex” annually in the United States.

      I AM SUCH A NERD.

      1. Arikel

        Beats off dying alone.

        1. Deanatay

          Even the Grim Reaper needs his bone polished every now and then…

        2. Gigafreak

          Leave the world in the same way you entered it: naked and screaming.

        3. StClair

          Everyone makes this joke (or variations thereon); no one thinks how traumatic it’d be for the partner. :p

        4. Deanatay

          Easy solution: die together!

        5. Disloyal Subject

          If there’s one thing the internet teaches us, it’s that everything is somebody’s fetish.

  15. GoogerGeiger

    It’s definitely a good thing Mary wasn’t around during that incident, or Ruth would definitely be in trouble. She’s a sharp one, that Mary.

  16. Mkvenner

    In Canada this would be justifiable homicide. Not just for the Leafs.

  17. Stephen Bierce

    Someone took a grapefruit and wore it like a hat
    A couple a’my buddies were under the kitchen table
    Talkin’ to my ol’ tomcat
    They were talkin’ ’bout hockey
    The cat was talkin’ back
    Round about then everything went black–but
    Wasn’t That A Party?!

    1. Kryss LaBryn

      Coulda been the whiskey; mighta been the gin
      Coulda been the three, four six packs, I dunno, but look at the shape I’m in

      Lord, that takes me back.

  18. LeslieBean4Shizzle

    See, this is why I voted for “Ruth and Billie again”. How can this NOT be the beginning of the next Slipshine?!

    1. GoogerGeiger

      Everyone wants to see Jason’s huge cock.

      1. Catullus

        Appropriate gravatar is appropriate.

        1. Architex

          +1

      2. timemonkey

        I just threw up in my mouth.

      3. Tenn

        A TA’s staff has a knob on the end…

        1. Solenoid

          It’s not nearly as suggestive when you leave the poem unfinished.

        2. xKiv

          It was too long.

    2. Keroshino

      Hate-fuck FTW!

  19. Boomwolf

    I think I can actually hear her fury.

  20. Kitschensyngk

    “Or maybe some Montreal Canadiens gear?…”

    1. Opus the Poet

      Not to a Leafs fan, them’s fighting words. When I was living up there (back when those were the only two Canadian teams) people were literally killed for that.

      1. Kryss LaBryn

        If any of you haven’t seen this, check out this NFB short film, “The Sweater“. Fantastic, and a Canadian classic. We all grew up on it.

        1. N0083rP00F

          Not all of us …. Some of us had other priorities or just could not enjoy watching a game that got ‘mericanized.

        2. Kryss LaBryn

          Understandable.

          “The Sweater” was one of the ones they played at us in school. Actually, the NFB films are pretty rad.

      2. Gigafreak

        Did they… … …

        …Did they apologize afterward

  21. Keroshino

    Looks like its Stabby time!

    Billie..u dun fucked up!!!

    1. No Name

      I think that was her intention.

  22. Estron

    Who cares about pro hockey in Bloomington, Indiana?

    1. KingMabel

      Angry Ruthless people.

      1. Dean

        Ruth, and people who want to have angry sex with Ruth.

        1. Arikel

          And the people that actually play the game.

      2. Deanatay

        And Billie.

        Because, Billie isn’t Ruthless.

        Cause she, you know, has a Ruth.

        Overexplaining is fun.

    2. Inspector Hound

      “Who cares about pro hockey in Bloomington, Indiana?”

      Look up “Indianapolis Racers” on Wikipedia. In particular, look at who they signed.

      (Besides, there are plenty of out-of-state, and out-of-country, students.)

    3. SonicBlueRanger

      Who cares about Hockey anywhere…*Sees Mobs of Hockey fans* Oh, Shit!

  23. Luzahn

    Hrm, I’m a bit worried something else is going on here; Ruth looks pretty disturbed in 4 and 6, and I’d think Billie’s comments would just make her angry.

    1. Solenoid

      I’m just assuming it’s a joke about how seriously some people take their sports, with the disturbed look there. Unless shown otherwise later, I guess.

    2. anonymsly

      I read it as a combination of shock and surprised. Ruth is shocked Billie would promote the Sens to her like this, and surprised she knows enough about hockey to know it’d get under her skin. And THEN she gets mad.

      I agree with commenters above: it looks like Billie’s learned a bit about hockey specifically to tease Ruth.

    3. Deanatay

      Two things to understand:
      1) Billie is deliberately provoking Ruth to anger, ’cause she finds that frickin’ hot. For these two, rage is the fastest route to sexytimes.
      2) Billie has found Ruth gets very emotional about her Leafs. As Billie is a Sens fan, this is an easy subject to provoke her with.

  24. Stomato

    Stupid question: Why exactly would Ruth get fired if they were found out? I mean, she’s a student too, right? Just because she’s an RA, does that mean she can’t have a relationship with another student?

    1. Dr.Zeus

      I imagine it would be due to the fact that Billie is under her care. If she were not her R.A. it would probably be fine.

    2. Em

      Power imbalance. It’s a rule at pretty much every college.

    3. John

      It does in fact mean that she can’t have a relationship with a student on her floor, because she’s in a position of authority over them. If Billie moved to a different dorm they could bang all they want and no one could say anything about it.

      At least not legitimately. It probably wouldn’t stop Mary from mouthing off, but she wouldn’t be able to get Ruth in trouble with the administration over it.

      1. Spencer

        Which makes me wonder why Billie doesn’t just request a transfer. Surely that would be easy enough in a dorm?

        1. No Name

          She’s 18, alcoholic and in love. That’s the stupidity trifecta.

    4. Arikel

      Pretty much the same reason why teacher’s aren’t allowed to bang students. Good thing no the teachers in this universe aren’t fucking stude- oh wait.

      1. Gigafreak

        >No teachers aren’t fucking students

        The next Slipshine will be Professor Rees receiving fellatio from Danny.
        NUMBER MUNCHER: A Dumbing of Age Pornographique

  25. KingMabel

    *patiently waits for opportunity for wrestling jokes*

    1. Solenoid

      You might be grappling with a long wait, then.

  26. Archivist

    (“Murder was in fact a fairly uncommon event in Ankh-Morpork, but there were a lot of suicides. Walking in the night-time alleyways of The Shades was suicide. Asking for a short in a dwarf bar was suicide. Saying ‘Got rocks in your head?’ to a troll was suicide. You could commit suicide very easily, if you weren’t careful.”)

    1. Bill

      WHERE IS THE FREAKIN’ “LIKE” BUTTON???

    2. Liz

      I’m so happy for this quote.

    3. WingedBeast

      Discworld references for the win! That’s Music With Rocks In right there.

    4. DarkoNeko

      Heh.

  27. Architex

    Ah, if Ruth ever gave a “You’re dead to me” look, it would be panels 4 & 6.

    1. cybik

      I’m pretty sure those are anger-lust.

    2. Arikel

      Those are “I’ll strangle you!” looks.

      Which are closely followed by “Her skin is so soft..” thoughts as she is strangling her.

      1. Deanatay

        “Auto ass fix” you say?

        1. Gigafreak

          Auto ass fix she hate.

        2. Deanatay

          Yeah, I’d hate to make repairs to Carla’s butt, too.

        3. Gigafreak

          It’s funny because the word “tailpipe” works on both the literal and figurative levels here

  28. Bill

    Supposedly there is a term for when someone provokes a fight with law enforcement that winds up with deadly force being employed known as “suicide by cop”.  I guess “assisted suicide by RA” isn’t entirely out of the question.

  29. Kenjia

    I love how hockey is a thing in this comic. Seriously. It’s awesome

  30. maxyai

    I hate hockey so this is meaningless to me. I don’t like any sport where you can go the whole game and end up at 0-0.

    1. Arikel

      amen brother

    2. Kryss LaBryn

      But 0-0 would either mean that both teams really sucked, or that both teams were really awesome. If the latter, you’d still end up with a really entertaining game despite no one actually scoring.

      1. N0083rP00F

        But you are forgetting that for a lot of “Fans” that it is not about how the game is played but by how big the scores are or the points spread …… Explains why Basketball is more popular than Football aka Soccer.

        1. Gigafreak

          Wasn’t it about the fistfights

          I thought it was all about the fistfights

        2. StClair

          “I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out.”

    3. SonicBlueRanger

      I’m not really a sports guy in general outside of Pro Wrestling but yeah that’s why I can’t get into Hockey or Soccer.

      1. Opus the Poet

        Pro wrestling is not a sport, they even admitted it when they changed the name to Worldwide Wrestling Entertainment.

    4. Roborat

      Sure you are not thinking about soccer? Very few hockey games end scoreless. Getting a shutout is a pretty big accomplishment for a goalie.

  31. motorfirebox

    Awww, it’s their first fi

    uh, their, fifth fi

    uh, their seven hundred and ninety-second fight!

    1. motorfirebox

      Wait, I’m JOEL?

      …Acceptable.

      1. motorfirebox

        *Joe, damn one of my uncles for having a name similar to a webcomic character

        1. zach

          He’s also a psychic, gay, anthropomorphic prick.
          Ballerina Mafia, I think.

        2. Kryss LaBryn

          Ha, I thought you’d slipped up and were referring to Watson.

  32. advancecasette

    Didn’t expect the breakup to happen so quickly

    1. insomniac

      You misspelled “furious hatesex” there.

      1. DarkoNeko

        They’re still supposed to be in Billie’s room, not Ruthless’

        1. Mr. Bulbmin

          Where will you be when FHS happens?

      2. ReFlex76

        Epic Hate Fucking, it’s Epic Hate Fucking

  33. Tacos

    Hrm… well my knowledge of hockey stuff pretty much begins and ends with the Mighty Ducks movies ~_~

    1. Kryss LaBryn

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZyDsF-Gp3o

      This will explain the conversation here, at least. 🙂

  34. 3dGuard

    Ruth’s face is priceless

  35. Idris

    As a Leafs fan, gotta say, I’ve been loving the recent strips, and am amused that your Indiana folks are as up to date with their Leafs jokes as your average Canadian.

    Since I’ve been lured into commenting, gotta say two things. First, cheer on a winning team? If you wanted a winning team, you wouldn’t cheer for the Leafs in the first place. Also, if you want a winning team, then you aren’t really a fan either. It’s the mindless love in the face of constant defeat that makes a true fan.

    Secondly, the Sens?! THE SENS?!

    Take her femurs and beat her mostly to death because death is too good for her, Ruthless!

    1. holiday_boi

      Eh, see but the Sens can actually beat the worst team in the NHL. Though the Leafs have only split the series, which is a little disappointing because the Sabres can usually count on winning that and seeing the Leaf fans’ angry disappointed faces as they leave First Niagara Center gives me life.

      Mostly because that’s pretty much the only time in recent years where I can leave without feeling horribly depressed but YOU KNOW.

      (Also I went through and counted and y’all aren’t doing as bad as Montreal vs the Sabres, so you have that over them).

    2. Arikel

      As someone who doesn’t even watch sports (other than esports), I can completely get behind this line of thought.

      You’re a fan because you wanna cheer, if you wanted to root for the winners, just wait until the outcome and be like “Yeah! My team won!”.

  36. coolhandluke

    and then they kiss

  37. zach

    I voted for the 3 dudes option, not least to see what people in the strip would be up for it.

    Joe? He doesn’t sound too keen on man on man, but who else would be with Danny and Ethan?

    1. Em

      It might not even be any of them at all!

      But if we’re gonna go with current cast members…

      Joe MIGHT. He seems extremely uncomfortable with his sexual orientation. He’s always having to assert it, almost like he’s making sure everyone knows he fucks chicks. But I dunno, I might be reading into it a lot more than necessary. Him and Danny though? I don’t think either of them would be down. It might feel like incest for them.

      I’d go with Jacob. Of the characters we know right now, I’ll go with Danny, Ethan, and Jacob.

      1. Heavensrun

        I’m pretty sure Joe is Straight with a capital S. He isn’t uncomfortable with his sexual orientation, he’s just -enjoying- it.

        He makes sure everyone knows because he’s broadcasting his availability.

        1. Nono

          I have a feeling if Joe got hit on by guys – good looking ones – he’d be flaunting it. ‘The J-Man’s that good that he got dudes like THAT to want a piece of him.’

    2. John

      For reasonably main characters, I think the only option is Ethan, Danny, and Mike.

      I have no prurient interest in dudes banging, but I want that to happen just because it would be awesome and hilarious and wrong.

      1. Gigafreak

        Mike has already expressed no qualms about hypothetically getting Danny’s sloppy seconds. Presumably he also would have no qualms about getting Dan-juice on himself directly from the source, unless it would involve Danny enjoying the process.

    3. Heavensrun

      The 3 Dudes option does not mean he has a plan for a 3 dudes slipshine, it’s just gauging where people’s mindsets are at in terms of subsequent pornings.

  38. Robert

    I think the honeymoon period has just officially ended.

  39. Em

    A lot of people are thinking this is break up city. Would they really break up over a sports team? Is that a thing that ACTUALLY happens?

    1. Chris28b

      It happens much more often than people would hope.

      1. Arikel

        I can confirm, I’ve broken up for less.

        (namely I didn’t like the name she gave my schlong)

        1. Gigafreak

          When she starts calling it “Millimeter Peter” it is probably not a compliment, no

        2. Roborat

          Millipete?

  40. nothri

    Dammit, all the easy puns have been taken and I don’t know enough about hockey to say something clever.

  41. Idon'tcarenomore

    Loved the DiskWorld quote. Excellent.

    Poke her again Billy, she’s heating up.
    Time for a tasteful fade out here, as the girls get down to business.

    To bad the two of them turn each other on by pushing each other’s pissed buttons.

    1. MissQuinn

      “too bad”?
      I do not think that phrase means what you think it means, my dear.

    2. Arikel

      It’d be a shame if their turned on-ness has a parallel exponential growth with their hornyness. They’d end up killing each other as the ultimate sex play.

  42. The Thing

    Angry Lesbian Hate-Sex is imminent.

    And also the perfect name for a band.

    1. Mr. Bulbmin

      Anything is a name for a band if you’re willing to stretch it.
      The kind of band is the issue.

      1. Nono

        I’m waiting for the Rubber Band, comprised of people who play music while wearing rubber suits.

        1. Heavensrun

          “Rubber Band” could totally be a mascot band for a condom company.

        2. Gigafreak

          Bangin’… on the drums
          Blowin’… into the trumpet
          Fingerin’… the cello
          Wailin’… into the microphone

          They’re safe even when they’re edgy, and they can always get a good rib in. They’re the Rubber Band!

    2. timemonkey

      Angry Bisexual Hate-Sex is imminent.

      1. Heavensrun

        Unless they bring in a guy, I’m pretty sure it’s still valid to call their sex acts “lesbian”.

        1. timemonkey

          Neither of them is a lesbian. So no. They don’t stop being bisexual just because there’s no penis involved at the moment.

  43. Ray Radlein

    Ah, the Maple-loafs. Making everybody else feel better since forever.

    (says a lifelong Cubs fan)

  44. DarkoNeko

    Someone’s feeling sassy right now XD

  45. Mojo

    As a Leafs fan myself, even I will admit that was a great burn.

  46. heavvymetalqueen

    Clever Billie who knows what buttons to push to turn sensible girlfriend anger into hot hockey-rage sex

    1. Bagge

      hot hockey-rage sex sounds much better than lesbian sexy suicide pact

  47. MissQuinn

    Y’know Bille, you could just ASK for a hatefuck.

    1. StClair

      I think that’s what she’s doing.

  48. Disloyal Subject

    Oh, Billie. Ruth does care about you, but you’re talking heresy. I’m not sure even your wiles can get you out of being scourged & purged.
    …oh hell, now I’m gonna interpret Astarte’s warcries lewdly.

    1. Disloyal Subject

      Adeptus Astartes is not possessive. I thought I’d disabled autocorrect…

  49. hythrain

    As someone from Toronto… this is legit how people will react. I honestly don’t care for hockey all that much. It doesn’t really matter to me who wins, so long as it’d be a Canadian team. However, to quote my hardcore Leafs fan of an older sister and the conversation we had…

    Me: “The Leafs are never in the playoffs. Why not just cheer for Montreal/Ottawa/any other Canadian team?”

    Sister (with wide eyes of death): “No. They’re our rivals. They have to lose. Don’t ever say something so stupid again.”

    Technically EVERY team is a rival!

    1. Ste Rose

      A rivalry is more personal than just a competitor. All criminals aren’t Sherlock Holmes’ rival, but Moriarty sure is.

  50. Bagge

    I would find Billie’s cattiness much more adorable if I didn’t think it was caused partly by the two bottles of booze from yesterday.

    You are right, Ruth, that discretion would be a smart move – but it’s awfully late in the game for you to demand discretion, miss pigtails-in-inkwells.

  51. Arianod

    I love how they’re both wearing Leafs shirts. There’s a nice cosplay idea.

    1. Bill

      i believe we touched on this the other day.  Billie is wearing the Leafs shirt; Ruthless has a ringer T-shirt that appears to be in Toronto colors, but it is not a Leafs shirt specifically.

  52. RavenEmperor

    As a hockey fan, I know her anger 😀

    1. DarkoNeko

      Fitting Avatar.

  53. timemonkey

    You deserve to be fired, Ruth. You’re a power mad, abusive asshole.

    1. DarkoNeko

      She’d make a good politician eh.

  54. Jimmy

    It’s sad that I know how Ruth feels, but in an American football sense. I’m a huge Cincinnati Bengals fan and people can’t help but give me crap when they find out.

    1. Pteropine

      Could be worse…I’m a Bills fan.

      1. Jimmy

        Touche’

  55. Trolldrool

    And this is why you never ask someone to betray their favorite team.

  56. Dorsai

    Hey being a leaf’s fan is no different than being a Dallas Cowboys fan… Most years the team is not the greatest but when they get on a roll, 🙂

    1. Solenoid

      When’s the last time the Leafs were on a roll? I’m curious. 😮

      1. David M Willis

        1967

  57. hof1991

    Fourth generation Packer fan. Yes, your team matters. Bears are rivals, Lions and Vikings are just teams you like to beat. But I’ll watch the Bears just to see them suck. There are even several songs, a chant and an abbreviation (tbss) that are quite common. Plus, Bears fans are FIBs.

    Billie may be pushing Ruth too far here. Or they may end up walking out after switching jerseys during hot sex and not notice it. Though Mary will.

    1. Bill

      Long-time Packer fan myself here too.  You could actually draw a diagonal line from roughly Green Bay to Dubuque IA, and as a general rule the “hated team” depends on which side of this line you find yourself.  Fans who find themselves to the south and east of this line generally all hate “da Bears”, and anyone north and west of the line feel that even if the Pack goes 2-14, as long as those two wins were against the Minnesota Viqueens it was a good season.

    2. LordHaw

      No, telling her to switch to the Montreal Canadiens would have been pushing Ruth to far. Always been a huge rivalry between Montreal and Toronto in hockey.

  58. Chris from Canada

    Kicking the Leafs while they’re down, eh?

    I’m a Habs fan, so maybe this is a weird thing to say, but I feel kind of bad for the Leafs, and especially bad for Leafs fans.

    Billie’s poking the bear. And for the record, Mr. Willis – “angry Canadian”… Is that a thing? Of course, I’m from the Maritimes, so what do I know?

    1. Fraser

      Yes its any Canadian when they talk to someone from Toronto about … well anything actually.

    2. Opus the Poet

      Talk to Rob Ford about bicycle infrastructure, or better yet Google it…

  59. Emma

    Are all Indiana teens so well versed in hockey?? Growing up kids only knew about footballs and hardly cared about hockey.

    1. No Name

      I think the implication is Billie cared enough about her relationship to look up some hockey facts. That, or osmosis.

      1. DarkoNeko

        Definitly osmosis.

      2. Emma

        It wasn’t just Billie. It was the girls on the floor too. Does Indiana just follow the NHL since they don’t have a football team?

  60. mick4state

    LGRW

  61. Flight03

    I am so happy that the only sports discussion thus far is all about the only sport I actually care for. <3

    Of course, both of these girls need to get some Red Wings apparel.

    And Mike can wear a Thrashers jersey just to piss me off.

    1. Fraser

      “Thrashers” is appropriate for mike. But lets be honest hes a bruins fan.

  62. AustKyzor

    -Maniacal laughter from the Canadiens fans in the distance-

  63. Alexx

    THE SPORTS HAVE BEEN OFFENDED!

  64. Jake

    oof, it took me a moment to figure out that the perspective completely flips between the first and second panels. the slow turn confused me because it looked like she was turning to look outside of the room.

  65. OnyxIdol

    Ruth looks ready to beat Billie up. Again.

  66. Gigafreak

    Oh… Of course Billie knows how to trash-talk rival sports teams. She used to be a cheerleader, which means it was basically her job!

  67. Spencer

    I’m torn between wanting these two to work things out together and building a 300 mile wall between them that can only be passed by undergoing sobriety tests and years of therapy.

    1. Bagge

      Their relationship is not one of their problems, but their problems are not helped by their relationship. MAYBE their relationship might be the path to a solution to some of their problems. Maybe.

  68. Opus the Poet

    OK I have lived in places where these were the NHL “home teams”: Leafs, Bruins, Kings, Mighty Ducks, Ducks, Stars, Predators, Flames (they used to be in Atlanta), and not in the NHL, the Golden Eagles. I still have a Golden Eagles souvenir puck someplace. We moved around a lot when I was a kid.

  69. Tenn

    *insert joke that someone who knows anything about hockey, or any other sport for that matter, would make*

  70. Stephen

    Ruth’s gonna need some ointment for that burn (in Billie’s defense, the Maple Leaf’s do suck….the only team worse would probably be Edmonton Oilers….like my sister cheers for….they are constantly the last team or second last team in the Western Conference)

  71. xKiv

    Assisted small death.

    1. Lel

      Hon hon hon

  72. Jay

    You never know when the black humour is going to creep in with these two. Assisted suicide…just wow 😛

  73. Church

    BUT LOOK AT HER FAAAAAAACE

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