128

Side
Posted on June 21, 2012 by David M Willis

128 thoughts on “Side”

  1. Plasma Mongoose

    RUN AG RUN!

    1. Khrene Cleaver

      -GO AG GO- -GO AG GO, GO GIRL GO GO!

  2. Jererry

    I wouldn’t threaten a masked vigilante, but maybe that’s just me.

    1. Wack'd

      “Let me get this straight. You think that your client, one of the wealthiest, most powerful men in the world, is secretly a vigilante who spends his nights beating criminals to a pulp with his bare hands; and your plan, is to blackmail this person? Good luck.”

      1. Sensedog

        ^This.

        Probably one of the best lines from The Dark Knight that I can recall.

      2. alex

        mother fucker beat me to it.

      3. Wonder Wig

        You have my respect Wack’d. And my bow.

        1. jimbo

          and my axe

        2. Dragon Nataku

          And my bear hands

        3. Jessie

          Richard FTW!

        4. Andiemus

          And my fork.

    2. ShadeTail

      Threaten? It looks more like an “if I figured it out, others can also” warning to me.

      1. Shadlyn Wolfe

        No, that was a threat. Come back and talk to me, or maybe I won’t be on your side.

        Which, of course, proves that she was never really on your side to begin with.

        1. Somebody

          Shade Tail isn’t wrong…it’s in the subtext. And she never said she would announce it to everyone. It just means Dorothy could try to find her.

  3. Twisted Two-face

    “Why is he running Dad? He didn’t do anything wrong…”

    1. ThatRobedGuy

      “Because he’s awesome.”

    2. Wack'd

      Because you touch yourself at night.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Watching the video below will cure him of that urge.

        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8Yxmz-csB4

        1. gerbilsinspace

          WHY!?

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          Because I can! 😀

    3. Aizat

      Because he can, son. Because he can.

  4. Bekah

    Oops.

  5. Mkvenner

    Kansas is smarter than the drunks Amazi-girl usually deals with.

  6. emeraldbeacon

    Not a dream!
    Not a hoax!
    Next issue… AMAZI-GIRL WILL BE UNMASKED!

    1. Mkvenner

      Even though it should be painfully obvious who it is.

      The first person to say Ultracar is getting Demopaned.

      1. Wack'd

        Ultracar.

        Sorry, I just really wanna know what demopaning is.

        1. Mkvenner

          http://youtu.be/AeFiSKIZuHg

      2. BedLlama

        I still say Amazi-Girl is Faz in drag.

        1. Mkvenner

          *shoots BedLlama in the head for that mental image*

      3. ryan

        ronald reagan?

    2. NCP19

      Don’t miss it!

    3. Ancestral Hamster

      Wait, unDRESSED?!

  7. shadowMobster

    Well that didn’t work. Time for plan “B”.

    1. Mkvenner

      Ask Dina?

      1. GenericScreenName101

        Dina the one who knows all

    2. Roborat

      Sometimes I go straight to plan “B”.

      1. begbert2

        Skipping to plan B is my plan A.

        1. Roborat

          I am sad, nobody got my obscure reference.

  8. Doctor_Who

    “Give it up, Walky, I know it’s you!”

    1. Yotomoe

      It’s really embarassing, the wigs, the implants, the obvious white-face makeup.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Sounds like a plot for a B-grade movie.

        1. Wack'd

          “This is starting to sound like a bad comic book plot!”

        2. Aizat

          Even Spider-Man think it’s bad and he’s the Butt Monkey of the Superhero community, well to me at least.

        3. Gneiss

          Nah, everyone knows that Aquaman is the Butt Monkey of the superhero community.

        4. begbert2

          Different superhero communities, technically.

        5. Doctor_Who

          I think Dorothy just wants to be Lois Lane. The reporter thing, and all.

          So when she meets a superhero she automatically assumes she’s going to be in a love triangle with both the hero and the secret identity. And since she’s dating Walky, that must be who Amazi-Girl is.

          He lives in the same dorm, is obsessed with cartoons (meaning he might have superhero fantasies), is smarter than he seems (Clark Kent always pretended to be a bit of a dope), and is altogether strange enough to do something like this.

        6. Kernanator

          Wow. I never thought of that.

        7. Plasma Mongoose

          I just hope that for Dotty’s sake that AG isn’t as much of a dick as Superman was.

        8. TheBenenator

          Nobody can beat Superman in a dick off. He is simply the worst there is.

          http://superdickery.com/, if you wish to browse through the evidence.

        9. Roborat

          Well, that was interesting. And I had forgotten how poorly drawn the comic of my youth were.

  9. Deemah

    The birth of Doctor Hugo Strange, as portrayed by Dorothy

  10. Ridureyu

    Shoot her, Amazi-Girl!

    1. Ridureyu

      She knows your secret!

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        She doesn’t need to, everyone who has ever read comics knows that either Dotty will either get amnesia or get killed.

        1. Mkvenner

          Thats the other comic Plasma.

        2. Wack'd

          …Oh my god, it is.

        3. Plasma Mongoose

          That’s just about every superhero comic/show MKV.

      2. Pat

        But so does everybody else now that she shouted it like that.

  11. Plasma Mongoose

    AG could always go the Spiderman route and get a job as a free-lance photographer who somehow always gets shots of AG in action.

    1. Khrene Cleaver

      Or better yet we could through the Shippers a bone and have Dotty AG’s Louis Lane.

    2. Mkvenner

      Only if Cave Johnson is the editor instead of Daisy.

      1. Mkvenner

        http://youtu.be/QLmiknX8bFI

      2. AidenRyan

        If Cave Johnson was the editor, I can just imagine Billie giving him some lemons.

        That would not be a good ending.

  12. Yotomoe

    Amazigirl is immune to logical inferences.

    1. Resne

      So she’s like an anti-Vulcan?

  13. Amaziboy

    Running till the end from crazy stalker girls who shouldn’t have the time for this.

  14. Plasma Mongoose

    I wonder if there are any other girls with Amber’s build, like Marcie for instance.

    1. Yotomoe

      Marcie..as amazigirl is the best imagery ever. I don’t care. Marcie is amazigirl

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        The only problem I can see with it is that Marcie doesn’t speak.

        1. Wack'd

          A simple fix. Walky-talky placed around the head area, an unknown assistant piping in her dialogue.

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          It’s a cunning plan, a plan so cunning that it graduated from Cunning College at the top of its class.

        3. Bryn

          “Is it as cunning as a fox who’s just been appointed Professor of Cunning at Oxford University?”

        4. Plasma Mongoose

          Not quite THAT cunning.

        5. Crumplepunch

          So cunning you could brush your teeth with it!

        6. Plasma Mongoose

          I think I will stick with a toothbrush. 😀

        7. CWR

          Does that make you a toothbrush adherent?

        8. Shadlyn Wolfe

          It is, m’lord.

        9. Kaylee

          Well, that’s just what she wants you to think, isn’t it?

        10. Yotomoe

          ultimate secret identity

  15. mistercellaneous

    It’s probably been suggested a million times already, but Mr. Willis should probably market a barbecuing apparatus called the AmaziGrill.

  16. Ryan

    I’m on your side! I’m threatening to completely expose your identity to the entire school and chasing you down and interrupting what might have been another mugging because I’M ON YOUR SIDE.

    1. Ryan

      *what might have been another mugging somewhere

    2. Resne

      Clearly this is a strategy worthy of David Xanatos himself.

      1. Ryan

        Pay a man enough, and he’ll walk barefoot into Hell.

      2. Andiemus

        It is a bit of a Xanatos Gambit, if AG reveals her identity than her curiosity is sated and she may or may not have a piece. If she doesn’t, then Dotty has the means to figure it out on her own and she has her piece anyway.

        1. Raoullefere

          Not to mention assuming Amazi-girl is decent enough that she won’t beat Dotty into a bloody pulp and solve the whole blackmail thing by threatening to do it again. Relying on the fact your foe isn’t a screw-the-consequences, result-driven douche like you are to have the upper hand is indeed quite Xanatos.

  17. Sensedog

    Dorothy is being surprisingly obnoxious with her line of “Do you want me on your side or not?” And all because Amazi-Girl won’t give her an interview.

    This is something that Dorothy should drop. Even if she were to figure out the truth, she would be making an enemy out of someone who might not hesitate to maim her given the circumstances; granted, Amber may not be a truly violent individual by nature, but that could change if the exposed truth has adverse consequences for her in the form of criminal charges, civil suites, expulsion from college, and so forth.

    Also, if Dorothy herself thinks that Amazi-Girl is awesome, she should take into consideration that others may think the exact same thing. In exposing the identity of Amazi-Girl, she might be making other enemies as well, albeit indirectly.

    1. Wack'd

      “You repel me.”

      Damn, I’m all about the quotes tonight.

      1. Syngraphea

        I was wondering when someone was going to make a reference to that!

    2. Yotomoe

      She’s a reporter, they fight for their stories and tend to be obnoxious

      1. Mkvenner

        Except at Fox they are just obnoxious.

    3. secret

      I highly doubt Dorothy would expose her once she finds out. i think she wouldn’t want to mess with Danny’s relationships

  18. Brasca1

    Hmmm. So who are the reporters that are not on Amazi-Girl’s side? Maybe Amber is avoiding her to keep her sharp at avoiding future reporters. Amazi-Girl is a hero so I don’t see her resorting to violence to stop Dorothy, but I do wonder if maybe she will seduce some info on Dorothy out of her ex Danny. Things that she could use against Dorothy.

    1. ryan

      billie? she’s the only other reporter who cares about figuring out amazi-girl’s identity. and she was doing it for personal gain, which we all know leads to super-villainy.

  19. NinjaNick

    Run, Amazi-Girl, run for your identity!

  20. Dave Van Domelen

    The in-universe John Byrne pulled that stunt on Starbrand at a comic convention (the whole, “The mask doesn’t stop me from knowing a lot…” Holmes trick).

    Later in the issue, he and everyone at the con were vaporized in a fight scene. Lesson learned.

    1. Raoullefere

      If only Dorothy could be ‘taught’ that lesson.

      Honestly, and I’m probably rather alone in this, but I think Mike dislikes Dorothy because she’s competing with him for the asshole slot*. Take the bullshit she’s laying down here: Dorothy isn’t on Amazi-Girl’s side. Dorothy just wants photos and maybe an interview to go with the story so she can look good. I mean, who knows, maybe it’ll help her get to her ‘rightful place’ in a better school. I get the idea that if throwing her grandmother under a bus would get Joyce a straight shot to Yale, the old lady’d better invest in a helmet and body armor, because she’s going to roll.

      *Position? Spot? How do you say that without making a double entendre?

      1. Gundi

        Well, to be fair, Amazi-Girl is a vigilante which, while freaking awesome, is also illegal. At the very least I’m sure she could get stuck with a couple of assault charges… Which makes Dorothy a bad person for not reporting her to the proper authorities.

        I’m sorry, but in the real world somebody would have gotten hurt by now. Maybe Amazi-Girl herself.

        1. AJBulldis

          It might make her actions criminal, but there’s a big difference between breaking the law and being a bad person.

        2. Andiemus

          That’s….. Debatable when it comes to assault.

      2. ryan

        role. role is the word you’re looking for. also, it rhymes with asshole.

        1. Raoullefere

          So it does. Thank you, and thank the mod, for making sure I got the name of the character I was commenting on right at least once.

          And sure Amazi-Girl is a dangerous vigilante… she’s always been a dangerous vigilante, to paraphrase a possible future version of the psychotic she’s modeling herself on. But you can’t tell me Dorothy wants the pix so she can *help* Amazi-girl or even help stop Amazi-girl. Hulk may be slow, and it may be hard for Hulk to think, but even Hulk ain’t buying that.

  21. Blob Marley

    She clearly wants you on her side. Her *backside*.

    … I’ll just be leaving.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Run Blob, RUN!

      1. CWR

        Don’t blobs ooze?

        I can’t believe that’s a sentence. There’s no way that’s a sentence – it’s impossible!

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          If an ooze pours out fast enough, you might say that the ooze is running.

        2. Blob Marley

          See: Boogers.

  22. Aizat

    If you’re on my side, then don’t follow me. If you follow me, you will never know the meaning of happiness. If you follow me, all you’ll find is death and crime and the rage of the beast.

    1. Campor

      I thought that was rock music.

      1. Roborat

        I thought it was scientology.

        1. Andiemus

          I thought it was a link to the twilight section of fan fiction.net.

  23. Charles RB

    You mock, but Dorothy has just pointed out to Amber how she’s leaving a bigger trail than Homer through a cake factory.

    1. Blob Marley

      Hey, writing an Iliad and an Odyssey is messy work.

  24. Kernanator

    Listen, Dorothy, Amazi Girl won’t return your calls. It’s over between you two.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Besides, Sal would never cheat on Billie like that. 😀

  25. vlademir1

    I’m betting Dorothy narrows the field down to two people doing that, Sal being one.

    1. Andiemus

      There’s no evidence that Sal ever did sports.

  26. Darth Cariss

    I’ve always thought it would be super hilarious if Amazi-Girl turned out not to be Amber in this, especially with how obvious it’s been, but never directly said.

    1. CWR

      Way to ruin the joke…DARTH.

  27. CWR

    Just briefly glanced at the comic and read the dialogue in the third panel as: “Do you want me inside you or not?”

    I really did.

  28. Lieutenant Dan

    Can’t put my finger on it, but there’s something about the coloring in panel 2 that I find pleasing.

    Also, butts.

  29. The Aussie Bloke

    There’s always the chance that Amazi-Girl lied about being on the track and field team. The perfect secret identity is the one that can’t be traced.

  30. Shadlyn Wolfe

    Dorothy should just be glad this is DoA and not Shortpacked; Amber is a dangerous foe in her own right, but Mike is a terrible one.

    Both? Apocalyptic.

  31. Kafloobop

    Well I predicted that Dorothy would know it was Amber, but she’s gonna find out pretty easily so I’m gonna call this a half victory.

  32. Jon Cann

    Swap out cross country for track and field (a reasonable thing for anyone who didn’t hear what Amazi-Girl just said to do), and…doesn’t Dorothy herself fit that description? Another campus reporter could easily compile this same evidence and wind up on Dorothy’s doorstep. She’s often unaccounted for because she’s alone studying…it’s already been said that she looks a lot like Amber….

  33. Dr.Z

    Amazi-Girl stops for a moment because she realizes how impressively stupid Dorothy actaully is.

    After all, if Dorothy could actually put any of that together she would have realized who Amazi-Girl is already.

    1. Jen Aside

      Yeah!

      …Walky XD

  34. newllend

    Hmmm.she might be a threat

Leave a Reply to Jen Aside Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

*

*

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.