170

Survey
Posted on January 13, 2019 by David M Willis

170 thoughts on “Survey”

  1. DarkoNeko

    Hi Ruthless

    1. Ana Chronistic

      “there IS a belle on her yuk yuk”

      (sorry, Arby’s coma… won’t happen again)

      [this week]

      1. King Daniel

        Our food will put you in a coma.

        Eat Arby’s.

        1. motorfirebox

          WE HAVE THE SLEEPS

        2. Roborat

          Good one.

      2. LeslieBean4Shizzle

        There certainly is!

        Also, not to backhandedly compliment myself, but that looks alarmingly like me and my wife. My wife’s green eyes burning with rage, me clinging to her arm like arm candy, a dopey smile on my face because cuddles!

      3. Geneseepaws

        But not an Isabelle, that is someone entirely different.

    2. Wizard

      Bye, Walky’s femurs.

      1. abysswatcher1993

        Walky will find a way to imitate Stephen Hawking to deal with his new disability.

  2. Doctor_Who

    “And does she occasionally walk back to her room, grab a hockey stick, and then come charging down the hallway for perfectly reasonable and totally non-violent reasons?”

    “What? No, that doesn’t sound like her at all.”

    “Don’t ask why, but when I say “Now!” you should duck.”

    1. Deanatay

      “She’s murder me if she heard me talkin’ about her like this, but fortunately – oh, hey Billie – fortunately she’s not around.”

  3. Derek

    Does Carla have crappy taste in hockey? Also she does not move silently

    1. King Daniel

      Hence the requirement for specifics.

    2. Pablo360

      Those are the specifics.

    3. DarkoNeko

      She may have crappy taste in hockey, we never know. But moving silently ? *CARLA ?*

      1. Tan

        Carla diligently perfected the art of moving silently just so she could always SPECIFICALLY choose not to.

        1. Needfuldoer

          She perfected the art of making her skates sound like her name, as seen a few days ago when she met Lucy.

        2. StClair

          “Could you not…?”
          “I COULD not!”

    4. keithcurtis

      Carla moves silently when she wants to, otherwise there would be no Hilarious Hallway Collisions.

  4. AnvilPro

    Walky is basically Ruth’s mother-in-law

    1. Dana

      I don’t quiiiite understand, but I don’t understand most things. Feels like it should check out.

    2. DailyBrad

      That’s astonishingly correct. Kudos on the comparison.

      He’s not really kosher on the pairing from an ethical standpoint, or at least wasn’t. I guess the power dynamic’s changed with Billie moved to another dorm and all. Beyond that, not like they’ve ever had positive interactions.

  5. Sam

    Does she tear out your femurs mercilessly for talking about her in the middle of a hallway?

  6. Cheesy1

    “You’re lucky I’m still on a make-out high, twerp!”

  7. Regalli

    So what hockey team does Carla support, then?

    1. Pablo360

      No, see, those are the specifics

    2. BBCC

      I choose to believe the Senators.

    3. Kamino Neko

      The Ruttens probably own one.

    4. Gregg Fielding

      Detroit Red Wings Primary Logo Owner James Norris chose a winged wheel as the team’s logo, a nod to Detroit’s growing reputation as the heart of the automobile industry. Norris decided that a version of their logo was perfect for a team playing in the Motor City and on October 5, 1932 when the club was renamed the Red Wings.

      1. Yumi

        Did the copy-and-paste function get away from you there?

        But I do support Carla being a Red Wings fan.

        1. Gregg Fielding

          No, I think the quote spoke for itself.

      2. BBCC

        Okay, my initial reaction was Red Wings too but then I changed it to Sens because I doubted myself on whether the Red Wings were a hockey team or football team.

        1. Yumi

          Okay, where in Canada are you, we’re gonna need to fight.

        2. BBCC

          XD I can’t memorize all the different hockey teams! I remember my house is a Leafs house and that’s about it. 😛

        3. BBCC

          Besides, Detroit’s an American team, surely that changes things?

          (Though, admittedly, Canada’s got the largest portion of players on it but that’s true of a lot of American teams).

        4. Yumi

          That’s just why I’m defensive– Michigander, Red Wings house here. Also, Canada’s, like, right there, and I’m ready to joust with with any given Canadian whilst on speedboats along the Detroit River at any given time.

        5. BBCC

          Yeah, yeah, talk when people don’t regularly cross that bridge into Canada. ;P

        6. DSL

          Do your Detroit River speedboat joust in the middle of the annual tugboat race and I’ll drive up to watch.

        7. foamy

          Not if it’s an Original Six team. Next you’ll be confused about the Bruins, Hawks, and Rangers!

        8. BBCC

          Look, I thought you’d all know from Ruth that sometimes we file things under ‘stupid American things’ so we can smile and nod politely while we converse, and then immediately forget what the thing is.

        9. foamy

          I mean yes there are lots of stupid American things but Detroit, Chicago, Boston, and New York have all had (in many years, very good!) hockey teams for yonks and yonks. We’re not talking about places like Phoenix here.

    5. Sporky

      To be totally honest, I think she doesn’t give a FUCK about hockey.

      1. Gregg Fielding

        Eh, she’ll give a quick glance for the skating and the people being tripped and sliding across the ice.

      2. Roborat

        Wow, I never saw someone say that before.

    6. Neeks

      For the sake of puns I’d have to go with the Winnipeg Jets.

    7. Spruce Goose

      Carla can be loud and obnoxious

      She’s totally a Penguins fan.

    8. Remmington Steele

      Blackhawks.

  8. chris73

    In the 2nd panel Lucy looked like she just morphed into a guy for a split second

    1. Pablo360

      What is this, El Goonish Shive?

      1. Mr. Bulmbin

        The plot somehow isn’t convoluted enough.

      2. Roborat

        There are webcomics with much more sex changing that EGS has.

    2. Foxhack

      Amazing what drawing smaller pupils can do to a face.

      1. chris73

        Wierd eh

  9. ValdVin

    Panel two Lucy’s face is great. That is just getting used to the Jell-O shots being suggested. Maybe the next time she asks, it’ll be “…besides Jell-O shots?”

  10. Nomad

    Gosh it’s good to see Ruth’s irises again!

  11. BBCC

    Pffft! Oh, Walky. I kinda like how he doesn’t like Ruth. It’s kinda amusing to me.

    And hey, Lucy, if you invite Ruth, Billie almost certainly won’t come. Try Jello shots.

    Too bad, Billie’s adorable cuddling her here.

    1. LeslieBean4Shizzle

      I KNOW, right?

      As I said above, that is basically exactly how I look when I play arm candy for my wife. And that’s also how my wife looks when she’s enraged. Which occasionally dovetail when I cling to her arm like that when she doesn’t want me to.

      1. BBCC

        Honestly, this strip has some of the cutest smiles and this is one of them. <3

        What a pity it'll disappear as soon as she sees Lucy.

    2. DailyBrad

      I like that it showcases Walky’s protective streak about Billie. Makes sense, though. Anytime Walky’s had to go to Ruth, etc, it’s never been for positive reasons, and he expressed disgust about the ethical landmine when he found out about the relationship. Maybe that can change now that Billie’s not under Ruth’s authority, but I mean, we’ll see how it goes.

      1. BBCC

        Exactly! That’s why I like it. And he’s so catty, it becomes funny.

      2. Poofdepoof

        Yes 🙂

  12. Stephen Bierce

    Today’s strip is brought to you by a borderline tasteless Ashley Madision banner ad.

    1. MatthewTheLucky

      Borderline?

      1. Wizard

        Yeah, that kindof implies that there might be such a thing as a tasteful Ashley Madison ad.

      2. Jason

        Ad?

    2. MK15

      Banner ad for me is for Lids.com, so, umm… what’s in your browser history?

      1. Yumi

        I’ve gotten some Ashley Madison ads on here before, too. Right now I have an ad for H&R block, which is kind of worse because it says, “Adulting is hard.” Stop trying to relate to me, advertisement.

        1. Wizard

          One day I had ads for right wing tee shirts and anti-HIV medication, which seemed even more bizarre in combination. And I really have no idea why one advertiser apparently believed that I was urgently in need of a coyote stretcher.

        2. Regalli

          Okay but that last one sounds awesome and definitely something we all need.

        3. Wizard

          It’s just a wire frame that keeps a coyote pelt from wrinkling up as it dries. Since I don’t skin a lot of coyotes, I somehow get by without one.

        4. King Daniel

          You sure you didn’t have any coyotes in need of stretching?

        5. Yumi

          I’m getting all gay cruises and cat water fountains now.

        6. Clif

          I’m getting a UNICEF ad now, but recently it’s been ads for DAZ.

        7. Ellegos

          I’m being offered LSAT prep materials and Chevy repair services.

        8. Catman

          I literally only get Mighty Ape ads on this site.

        9. Geneseepaws

          Glad I didn’t look it up on Urban Dictionary.com … Though a Fox stretcher seems much more useful and practical.

        10. Wizard

          They come in several different sizes for different animals.
          And today, I’m getting ads for the Manscaper, because apparently trimming one’s pubes requires a specialized tool.

      2. Needfuldoer

        I’m getting ads for acne medication, clickbait-y hotel review sites, and car insurance today. (Though to be honest that last one is the free space in advertising bingo.)

        At least they’re not “you are today grand prize winner of $500 gift card!” redirect ads!

      3. Agemegos

        I’m getting a banner ad for a Formula 1 Grand Prix that is being held 1,300 km from here.

        1. Roborat

          They must think you REALLY like Formula I.

    3. Antonio Tyler

      I got Big Joe couches. Probably because I’m a spider bite away ffrom Peter B. Parker.

    4. Makkabee

      I get James Madison ads. My webbrowsing history is weird.

    5. CJ

      Never realized how much annoying ads are filtered out because of the Firefox Clear content blocker. Nothing animates, page forewords or stuff. For this site, I just get hiveworks or video game ads on this browser.
      Mostly clothes when I switch to my iPhone.

  13. Deadjolras

    Ruth towering over everyone in the last panel is a great visual.

    1. King Daniel

      Towering and glowering.

  14. lilyliv

    Awww, Billie’s face in the last one… ^-^

    1. LeslieBean4Shizzle

      I KNOW, right?

      **happy grin**

    2. Keulen

      She’s looking particularly adorable there.

    3. ValdVin

      Practically glowing. Or is that after-makeout afterglowing?

  15. StClair

    “Scary beyond all reason?”

  16. timemonkey

    It’s a Canadian superpower, we’re supernaturally quite movers. You’ll never know we’re there until we strike.

    1. BBCC

      Yep, we’re like pumas.

      1. Makkabee

        But do you live in cravices?

        1. BBCC

          In a place as cold as this? Nah. I choose to keep on living.

        2. 3-I

          There aren’t any pumas in this country, Makkabee.

    2. Keulen

      Canadians are all ninjas? I had no idea.

      1. Arianod

        Not all of them. Some are only half ninja.

        1. Clif

          So the half that are ninja we can’t see and the other half we can only see half of the time, so there are actually four times as many Canadians as we think there are.

        2. Arianod

          Of course! You didn’t really believe that silly story that all the population of Canada is concentrated on the US border, did you?

        3. Clif

          Only the invisible ones. When the time is right they’ll come sweeping over the border and the next thing you know we’ll be mercilessly forced to be polite and nice to each other and say eh all the time. Eh?

  17. Dedlok

    She’s right behind me, isn’t she?

    1. Lacuna

      “Oh! H-hey Ruth. Would’ve told you to your face, but ah…you didn’t seem to be around.”

  18. GenJen

    I know she means well, but I still think what Lucy is doing is wrong.

    Asking Billie what movie she’d want to watch is better than going behind her back and talking to her former floor mates. And the potential backfire could make a neutral living situation negative. (I don’t count your roommate not wanting to interact with you negative).

    Lucy’s really nice…she’s just also not that considerate in her own special, albeit nice, way (like jumping into Billie and Walkie’s convo to give advice, but getting it wrong).

    1. BBCC

      Well, the movie’s already picked and set. The question is how to make Billie come tonight so Lucy’s crappy friends will come. Asking ways to get Billie to come to a party isn’t really invasive imo.

      1. GenJen

        Since it seems like this is just a thing for the people in her hall, I don’t think changing the movie would be too hard. And making the movie one Billie would like seems an easier way to get her to come.

        I think it’s weird for a person from one section of your life to run to another section to ask questions about you without your knowledge to get you to do something you already declined. Not mean-spirited, but definitely a bit invasive. My roommate and I barely talked second year. I’d be weirded out if he went to one of my clubs and asked questions about me.

        It’s not like Lucy is throwing Billie a surprise party. She needs Billie to go for her “friends” to go. This current plan seems a bit more obtuse than being straight forward with Billie on why she needs her at the party. Plus, I doubt Lucy was gonna tell Billie about this excursion, but chances are someone from Billie’s old floor would tell her that her new roommate was snooping around.

        I’m sure Billy would take that news great.

        Lucy didn’t think this through.

        1. BBCC

          There’s a movie schedule so I assume these things are planned in advance and Spencer mentioned she had to find the movies first.

          I think it depends what the questions are. How to get Billie to go to a movie night doesn’t seem like a big deal to me, though you’re right that doing it after Billie said no is sucky (I’ll admit, I forgot Billie said no unless Lucy got more jock guys to come). Snooping makes it sound like she wanted more personal information on Billie than she does, personally, but that’s semantics.

        2. the final pam

          Lucy did start just asking about Billie generally and wounded up getting some pretty personal information on Billie, like her drinking problem and the suicide pact, albeit that wasn’t information she was necessarily seeking out.

        3. BBCC

          Carla spilling personal things she shouldn’t is on Carla. All Lucy asked Carla was how people in that dorm dealt with Billie’s popularity and, when Carla laughed, if that wasn’t actually true, and then she asked how to get Billie to go to the movie (which, I’m guessing, is what she came to ask people since she asked Walky here).

        4. Sam

          I am in agreement with BBCC. It’s not like Lucy showed up and asked to learn about her family tree and life history.

          This is more like if you got a new roommate, who is there for like 3 days, now all your friends are obsessed with them to the point of ignoring you even though this person is an absolute bongo. So you go ask the person they used to live with ‘hey, how did you handle this situation?’ And then, when they say that didn’t happen to them, you’re like ‘well, do you know what might make them interested in attending X so my friends will actually hang out in the same room as me?’ In this scenario you are a people pleaser so this is what you try to do instead of getting better friends.

          Talking to other people that know someone and have been in a similar situation with them as you are right now when you are seeking an opinion or advice in regards to them isn’t a bad thing because they’re more likely to give you accurate/good advice than someone who doesn’t know them and can only give you general advice.

    2. Jackson

      I’d say that Lucy’s intel mission is mostly benign, but on net, it’s still a little too Joyceish to not be a bad idea.

  19. Bagge

    Good advice, Walky.

    And good news! You won’t have to talk to Sal if you are dead.

    1. BBCC

      Though you might if she walks out the door and sees you.

      1. ShinyNeen

        Maybe he can choke out the appropriate words mid-femur removal?

  20. Vukodlak

    Ruth makes a cat sound like the T-Rex from Jurassic Park.

  21. Nikol Geier

    I totally called this, and I’ll add my second prediction: Billie’s and Ruth’s “date” for movie night is what is going to lead to the depressing Valentine’s Day comic.

  22. Jess

    I cant stop laughing at Lucy’s face in the second panel, she looks so confused.

  23. WingedBeast

    You know what, Ruth? He called you a violent autocrat. You don’t get to be mad about that until you can honestly dispute that point.

    1. BBCC

      Nah, it’s the ‘likes crappy hockey teams’ bit. I’m a Canadian. Trust me on that.

      1. Emily

        She can’t dispute that either.

        1. BBCC

          Tell that to any leafs fan ever. 😛

        2. Emily

          I’d prefer to keep all of my limbs firmly attached to my body.

        3. BBCC

          See? You get it. 🙂

      2. Needfuldoer

        That’s when she stopped listening, isn’t it.

        1. BBCC

          Yeah, after that all she heard was ‘kill me, kill me, kill me’.

  24. BarerMender

    Ruth puts her hand on Walky’s shoulder. “Ding ding, smart boy.”

  25. abysswatcher1993

    I knew Carla was a jerk, but I didn’t thought of her as an autocrat. When I think about violent autocrats I imagine Trump, Bolsonaro and Lars Von Trier.

  26. Antonio Tyler

    AND THEN WALKY PERISHED

  27. Ele

    Billie hanging lovingly on Ruth’s arm makes me smile 🙂

    1. Bagge

      They are so cute!

    2. ShinyNeen

      It’s the best part of a great panel!

  28. BadRoad

    Ruth’s ability to move alarmingly silently is probably the best way to differentiate her from Carla, at least when describing them to strangers.

  29. Hoodiecrow

    Cute Billie is acutely cute.

  30. Bryy

    Oh, this took a delightful turn.

  31. stoodmuffin

    How could I have been SO BLIND. Of COURSE this is where it’s heading!

    So.

    What mental shit is Billie going to address in THIS arc?

    I think you need to give all your characters a break from their lives of constant stress, Willis.

    JUST LET THEM BE GAY AND CUTE.

    1. MatsuoTanuki

      please…?

    2. BarerMender

      I’m afraid Billie will want to keep her status in her new dorm more than she’ll want to keep Ruth.

      1. Emily

        Then she deserves to lose both.

        1. Needfuldoer

          As though she deserves either in the first place.

        2. Schpoonman

          Oh man, can I hang out here more?

  32. Bathymetheus

    Ruth and Billie are holding hands. That may slow her down enough for Walky to keep his femurs out of her reach.

  33. BenRG

    I suspect that Ruth at the moment is conflicted as to whether she’s just been insulted or complimented!

    1. DarkoNeko

      the only thing that entered her ears was “poor taste in hockey” and that’s not gonna pass.

  34. ktbear

    So clearly Walky didn’t learn a darn thing from his run-in with Carla did he?

    1. Eldritch Gentleman

      Learning from past mistakes is not exactly Walky’s strong point…

      1. Clif

        Oh, he learns. He just learns the wrong thing.

  35. Eldritch Gentleman

    Anyone else thinks that Ruth is related to McNinjas?

  36. Bagge

    This is a common Clark Wing nightmare.

    1. ShinyNeen

      Ruth-related nightmares are the #1 cause of sleep deprivation among residents of the floor. Even after she turned a new leaf.

  37. Arianod

    I put a bell on youuuu

    Becaause you’re miiiiiiiiine

    1. Someguy

      You’re mine, you’re mine, you’re miiiiiiiiine!

  38. Fire_daws

    RIP Walky

  39. Nobody

    I feel like Walky realizes his impending doom in the last panel but would rather continue for the sake of humor than attempt to weasel out of it

    1. Clif

      She’s not going to remove the femurs of a pseudo brother-in-law. So Walky is relatively safe for Billie’s sake.

  40. Emily

    I’m hoping this is where what Billie has been saying about Ruth behind her back comes out.

  41. Zaxares

    *raised eyebrow* But Carla does not move alarmingly silently. If anything, you can usually hear her coming a mile away thanks to her skates.

    1. Zee

      That’s where the specifics come in

  42. Deanatay

    “At this moment, I would cheerfully rip out your femurs, but something appears to be impeding my right arm’s range of motion.

    “That same something seems to be quelling my rage, so you’re doubly lucky.”

  43. Remmington Steele

    Walky should surely crack the “silent but deadly” joke at this point.

  44. Whaatt

    Does Walky remember dorothy’s Saying?
    “Oh,Walky what did I say about insulting stuff that are important to others?”
    Now would be a great time to remember
    That saying.

    Looking at his face right now, he
    Obviously doesn’t remember
    Or care at all. Has Dorothy
    Keener finally escape Wally’s mind or

    Brain? I had and earlier feeling that Dorothy would be
    Envious of amber moving in on Walky so quickly. Or would
    Horrified be a better one?
    I bet that Dorothy would be disappointed in amber, weren’t they friends?
    No?
    Didn’t Dorothy save her from her fight with sal? She didn’t

    Yell,
    or anything.
    Unless I skipped a strip. I wish Walky can read this comment right now,

    specifically the first letter of every paragraph or line, except this last one.

    1. Poofdepoof

      Well done, I like it 🙂

    2. King Daniel

      *claps*

  45. chris73

    I want to like Ruth so I’m hoping she can quell her violent urges and become a better person than she currently is and this here is probably a good test for her because Walky is probably one of the most annoyingly obnoxious characters in the cast

    1. thejeff

      Out of curiosity, when was the last time Ruth didn’t quell her violent urges?
      (Not counting play violence with Billie.)
      As far as I can remember, she’s been good since before she went into the hospital. Slapping a sharpie dick onto Mary might have been the last violent thing she did.
      If those are your standards, I’d say she’s well on the way to being that better person.

      Billie’s been violent much more recently.

      1. jeffepp

        She did bodyslam Blaine, but that was technically in self defense.

        1. BBCC

          It was also pre-smacking Mary iirc.

      2. chris73

        It’s only been couple of weeks, she’s got a long ways to go yet which is why this situation with Walky will be a good gauge on where she’s at

  46. WarDragon

    Why do people keep calling Ruth “gangly?” She’s tall and fairly lean, but *athletic,* not awkward and overly skinny.

    1. Schpoonman

      People will exaggerate when insulting someone. Walky doesn’t have a great reason to look at Ruth too positively.

  47. Remmington Steele

    The phrase “bell the cat” means

    “to attempt something formidable or dangerous.”

    I concur, and hope Walky is up for the challenge!

  48. Micki

    I know this is an old trope of a joke, but I still laughed out loud. Thanks, Willis.

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