Dumbing of Age Book Fourteen

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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BUFFER WATCH Comics are currently drawn and uploaded through:

October 20, 2026

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agatha amazi-girl amber art asher becky blaine booster carla carol charles danny dexter dina dorothy ethan fan art faz hank jacob jason jennifer jocelyne joe joyce leslie linda liz lucy malaya marcie mary mike monkey master patreon rachel raidah robin ross roz ruth sal sarah sierra walky
naomi drops f-bombs and word-of-the-day calendar vocabulary, she's got range
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This moment forward

Posted In: comic
└ Tags: ethan, naomi

Discussion (162) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. NGPZ
    NGPZ
    September 28, 2024 at 12:02 am | # | Reply

    brotha cease this opportunity! this is the BEST!

    time to put yo mamma’s newfound “”respect”” to the test! >:D

    • Yumi
      Yumi
      September 28, 2024 at 12:03 am | # | Reply

      Seize?

      • NGPZ
        NGPZ
        September 28, 2024 at 12:05 am | # | Reply

        yeah that’s what im sayin, time to watch how Ethan be playin’ this

      • Lysbeth
        Lysbeth
        September 28, 2024 at 11:20 am | # | Reply

        And dezest

    • anon
      anon
      September 28, 2024 at 2:36 am | # | Reply

      i mean, if i were asher, might be sociopathic but i’d totally be petty and like “i’m kinda dealing with suicidal ideation by hooking up too, if we break up and i kill myself, we already have pics of us together on my social media so your son will def be known throughout the city as my last relationship before my death”

      • Meeks
        Meeks
        September 28, 2024 at 3:10 am | # | Reply

        what the fuck? what would that accomplish?

        • Azhrei Vep
          Azhrei Vep
          September 28, 2024 at 4:27 am | # | Reply

          Fucking with Naomi.

          anon did lead with “might be sociopathic but…” after all.

        • anon
          anon
          September 28, 2024 at 4:37 pm | # | Reply

          Well luckily asher wouldn’t actually do that hopefully , as opposed to someone that would’ve been in an unstable state of mind like Ruth did in the early ruth/jen days

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          September 28, 2024 at 4:45 pm | # | Reply

          Have you never gone completely overboard and said something so out of pocket that your comment and the pocket were barely even aware of each other’s existence, all to fuck with somebody you could never see yourself getting along with?

  2. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    September 28, 2024 at 12:03 am | # | Reply

    *Ethan and Asher go at it*

    “I was hoping you would at least have the same amount of shame as you would have fucking a GIRL in front of me”

    • Morrison
      Morrison
      September 28, 2024 at 12:05 am | # | Reply

      “No.”

    • Ray Radlein
      Ray Radlein
      September 28, 2024 at 12:11 am | # | Reply

      Oh, like she wouldn’t have been down to watch him do Joyce way back when

      • Rowen Morland
        Rowen Morland
        September 28, 2024 at 4:19 am | # | Reply

        Guess she needs a heteronormative sickos meme, leaning against the window.

        • Opus the Poet
          Opus the Poet
          September 28, 2024 at 6:29 pm | # | Reply

          Dr. Heteronormative is a villain on Questionable Content.

          https://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1526

    • Kazuma Taichi
      Kazuma Taichi
      September 28, 2024 at 10:37 am | # | Reply

      “I dunno, my mom showed up unannounced, I’m feeling a little suicidal about that”

    • anon
      anon
      September 28, 2024 at 4:38 pm | # | Reply

      Pretty sure she basically told ethan to ‘fuck joyce’s brains out/get her pregnant asap’ as soon as they met during that parental visitation day

      • Ana Chronistic
        Ana Chronistic
        September 29, 2024 at 12:03 am | # | Reply

        yeah but fuck Joyce’s brains out IN HER FACE?

  3. shadowcell
    shadowcell
    September 28, 2024 at 12:05 am | # | Reply

    Dumbing of Age Book 15: As of This Very Second, It’s Cool With You for Me to Have Sex With Men

    • Radiance
      Radiance
      September 28, 2024 at 12:14 am | # | Reply

      Dumbing of Age Book 15: Your Hypothetical Is Detailed In A Way That I’m Finding Portentous

      (Portentous is bolded, underlined, and, quite possibly, WordArt.)

      • Clif
        Clif
        September 28, 2024 at 12:51 am | # | Reply

        Nice.

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        September 28, 2024 at 4:20 am | # | Reply

        I hope it’s the shiny, chrome effect WordArt. That one’s the best.

        • Opus the Poet
          Opus the Poet
          September 28, 2024 at 6:36 pm | # | Reply

          No, it should be dripping blood Word Art, dripping from bent and welded round tubes.

      • ValdVin
        ValdVin
        September 28, 2024 at 4:34 am | # | Reply

        I’d put it in a PT, Bridgeport-style balloon from Pogo.

      • Pergola
        Pergola
        September 28, 2024 at 9:08 am | # | Reply

        I am sure “Your Hypothetical Is Detailed In A Way That I’m Finding Portentous” is related to “Suspiciously Specific Denial”.

        • Laura
          Laura
          September 28, 2024 at 9:05 pm | # | Reply

          Said in a Darth Vader voice:
          “I find your lack of faith disturbing.”
          “I find your detailed hypothetical portentious.”

      • Nathan
        Nathan
        September 28, 2024 at 1:00 pm | # | Reply

        I came here to make sure someone had made this joke ?

  4. Animedingo
    Animedingo
    September 28, 2024 at 12:05 am | # | Reply

    Theres so many better words than portentous

    • NGPZ
      NGPZ
      September 28, 2024 at 12:10 am | # | Reply

      momma KNOW our brotha’s hypothesis be ominous
      he already be playin’ an’ challenging her dominance

    • Dday
      Dday
      September 28, 2024 at 1:02 am | # | Reply

      Lepidopterists.
      Canticle.
      Perspicaciousness.
      Astrolabe.

      • Michael Steamweed
        Michael Steamweed
        September 28, 2024 at 6:39 am | # | Reply

        Berma Shave?

      • Mark
        Mark
        September 28, 2024 at 7:05 am | # | Reply

        Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious?

      • morleuca
        morleuca
        September 28, 2024 at 7:42 am | # | Reply

        Shibumi

      • Clif
        Clif
        September 28, 2024 at 8:17 am | # | Reply

        Your Hypothetical Is Detailed In A Way That I’m Finding Astrolabe.

        No, not feeling it.

        • Shadowsnail
          Shadowsnail
          September 28, 2024 at 10:55 am | # | Reply

          In the closet, Asher is a certified babe.
          Check that heavenly body with an astrolabe.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        September 28, 2024 at 6:53 pm | # | Reply

        Or to be a bit meta: sesquipedalian.

    • Yugnat
      Yugnat
      September 28, 2024 at 3:30 pm | # | Reply

      Says you, I learned a word today.

    • Ana Chronistic
      Ana Chronistic
      September 29, 2024 at 12:04 am | # | Reply

      prognosticatory?

  5. RassilonTDavros
    RassilonTDavros
    September 28, 2024 at 12:06 am | # | Reply

    I really love how 110% done with his mom’s shit Ethan is here.

    I mean I’ve felt that way about Ethan in general since the time skip, but this conversation in particular brings me joy.

    • Boop
      Boop
      September 28, 2024 at 12:56 am | # | Reply

      Same. I hate that it’s come at the cost of nihilism but he’s needed, for a long time, the courage to tell toxic people to go fuck themselves.

    • Da Boy
      Da Boy
      September 28, 2024 at 5:04 am | # | Reply

      It would be incredibly funny if his mother’s shit was the push Ethan needed to start living again, just live a happy gay life out of Spite for his shitty mother.

      • anonymsly
        anonymsly
        September 28, 2024 at 6:55 am | # | Reply

        I do hope that the barrenness of Ethan’s field of fucks prompts him to point out that he’s gay whether or not his mom allows it so….

  6. jeffepp
    jeffepp
    September 28, 2024 at 12:08 am | # | Reply

    “How hot is he?”

    Opens closet door.

    “Yes, OK, this time.”

    • Daibhid C
      Daibhid C
      September 28, 2024 at 5:42 am | # | Reply

      Yep, that’s how homophobia works.

      • SillyGoose
        SillyGoose
        September 28, 2024 at 4:26 pm | # | Reply

        Counterpoint: we know that’s not how homophobia works, but then we also know homophobia _doesn’t work_ so there’s that.

        • ANeM
          ANeM
          September 28, 2024 at 8:21 pm | # | Reply

          The Homophobia knows what it is because it knows what it isn’t. By subtracting what it isn’t from all things, it can accurately determine what it is.

    • Dday
      Dday
      September 28, 2024 at 2:02 pm | # | Reply

      Twirls hair, pupils dilate.

      “… Ok, but how gay is he?”

  7. Bedovian
    Bedovian
    September 28, 2024 at 12:08 am | # | Reply

    Naomi isn’t great but she is kind of hilarious in a toxic way.

    • Meagan
      Meagan
      September 28, 2024 at 12:28 am | # | Reply

      I agree, at least in this strip. She brings a different flavor than our more standard villain parents.

    • Risky
      Risky
      September 28, 2024 at 12:44 am | # | Reply

      I’m digging the truckload of genre savvy.

  8. Matrix
    Matrix
    September 28, 2024 at 12:09 am | # | Reply

    He don’t care and that’s okay

  9. Sirksome
    Sirksome
    September 28, 2024 at 12:11 am | # | Reply

    And then they start making out in front of her to test her conviction. And that’s chapter 1 of Amber’s latest fic!

  10. Jess
    Jess
    September 28, 2024 at 12:11 am | # | Reply

    So is this a ‘you can be gay because I don’t want you to end yourself”, thing? Or are there other factors that we don’t know yet?

    Because one the one hand baby steps. Maybe she can learn and grow because she does deep down love him and all that.

    But my pessimistic side says that she may be reacting to some kind of outside thing that we don’t know yet. And she won’t grow and her bigotry prevents her from actually loving him.

    • Bryy
      Bryy
      September 28, 2024 at 12:15 am | # | Reply

      Naomi’s Conditional Love is Conditional.

    • Yumi
      Yumi
      September 28, 2024 at 12:15 am | # | Reply

      Let’s not over look that “Until you’re feeling better, anyway.”

      • Michael Steamweed
        Michael Steamweed
        September 28, 2024 at 6:40 am | # | Reply

        “Once you’re not depressed anymore, then we’ll go back to pushing you into heterosexuality again.”

    • Sirksome
      Sirksome
      September 28, 2024 at 12:19 am | # | Reply

      If I were to give Naomi credit she doesn’t deserve the whole “for now” thing is a way of trying to maintain control she knows she doesn’t have over Ethan’s sexuality and that she’s already accepted it, but can’t admit it yet. She doesn’t want him to die and hopefully her conditional acceptance will lift his spirits and maybe there’s a vague hope there he will somehow become straight, but that’s assuming a lot. On face value though it doesn’t need to be more complicated than what she’s said. No ulterior motive or outside factor needed for a parent to not want their child flirting with clinical depression and suicide. Maybe she just read one of many reported sources that lgbt+ youth are more likely to harm or kill themselves.

      • Mark
        Mark
        September 28, 2024 at 7:10 am | # | Reply

        But that would mean that she’s not irremediably evil. The comment section would never allow that.

        • Lumino
          Lumino
          September 28, 2024 at 9:02 am | # | Reply

          Right? I know Naomi is a piece of shit, but I’ve actually found this exchange kind of heartwarming.

          She’s STARTING to change, with baby steps. She realized that she’d much rather have a homosexual son who is happy and alive, then a heterosexual son who is dead.

          Many parents would rather deny that until the day something awful happens, but she at least was aware enough of the consequences to decide “I’d rather accept a lifestyle I find repulsive then bury my baby.”

          Yeah, the bar is a tripping hazard in Hell, but we’ve all got to start some where.

          • Taffy
            Taffy
            September 28, 2024 at 3:54 pm | # | Reply

            At the very least, Naomi’s behavior is an opening for change, even if she’s not actually moving for that opening right now. It’s an opportunity, whether she takes it or not.

    • anon
      anon
      September 28, 2024 at 2:38 am | # | Reply

      She did say “until you’re feeling better” but i doubt she’d really realize ‘being himself’ would make him happier versus him being in an even worse state if asher breaks up with him, or somehow even dies as well (that would be pretty messed up as a queer curse, “somehow my partners keep dying” in a separate kinda story but i imagine that might not be well received given the ‘bury your gays’ tropes or so)

    • Daibhid C
      Daibhid C
      September 28, 2024 at 5:44 am | # | Reply

      “You can be gay if it means you don’t kill yourself. We will discuss this further when I’m not worried you’re going to kill yourself” isn’t baby steps. It’s barely facing in the right direction.

      • Mark
        Mark
        September 28, 2024 at 7:15 am | # | Reply

        Obviously the counter to this is to maintain the appearance of a self-destructive bent even if/when Ethan no longer actually feels that way.

        The practical problem with manipulating others is that people are clever and can learn to use your manipulation to further their own ends.

        • Clif
          Clif
          September 28, 2024 at 8:28 am | # | Reply

          The problem with maintaining a sustained appearance is that over time it becomes frozen in place and it can become difficult to ascertain which is the reality and which is the appearance, even by yourself.

          Being a clever manipulative ape who is surrounded by other clever manipulative apes, some of whom are even more clever, is the curse of being human.

  11. Grayfinity
    Grayfinity
    September 28, 2024 at 12:13 am | # | Reply

    “Well,” he chuckles dryly, “I never said it was a hypothetical.” In that instance, Asher pops out of the closet. Before Naomi could say another word, the two were already off. Had Naomi been actually supportive, she’d cheer for her son. Instead, she cursed bitterly under her breathe.

    • Grayfinity
      Grayfinity
      September 28, 2024 at 12:14 am | # | Reply

      Oof, minor spelling mistake.

      • Michael Steamweed
        Michael Steamweed
        September 28, 2024 at 6:41 am | # | Reply

        Sadly, no edit function for us.

    • AeromechanicalAce
      AeromechanicalAce
      September 28, 2024 at 1:45 am | # | Reply

      Ghostwriting for Amber?

      • Grayfinity
        Grayfinity
        September 28, 2024 at 9:03 am | # | Reply

        Maaaaaaaaaaaybe?

  12. DailyBrad
    DailyBrad
    September 28, 2024 at 12:14 am | # | Reply

    I love how Ethan is giving her more pushback than he once could have, being more defiant. So much of his life right now isn’t healthy, but this is at least a good thing.

    • Bash
      Bash
      September 28, 2024 at 4:15 am | # | Reply

      The thing about depression is that it frees you from a lot of your old concerns.

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        September 28, 2024 at 7:26 pm | # | Reply

        “Behold the field on which I grow my Fucks and see that it is Barren.”

        • Laura
          Laura
          September 28, 2024 at 9:17 pm | # | Reply

          Amen to that!

          htck.github.io/bayeux/#!

          knowyourmeme.com/memes/medieval-tapestry-edits/photos

          openculture.com/2020/06/construct-your-own-bayeux-tapestry-with-this-free-online-app.html

          • Laura
            Laura
            September 28, 2024 at 9:21 pm | # | Reply

            Original image in question:

            https://miro.medium.com/v2/resize:fit:850/1*ch7myGwIBQf0yddnhblDbg.jpeg

  13. Davus
    Davus
    September 28, 2024 at 12:19 am | # | Reply

    Ethan is handling this better than I thought he would. Now any hypocracy is going to be much clearer than expected.

  14. EtchJetty
    EtchJetty
    September 28, 2024 at 12:19 am | # | Reply

    my partner…. 🙂

  15. Chaucer59
    Chaucer59
    September 28, 2024 at 12:19 am | # | Reply

    F-bombs and a sesquipedalian vocabulary are not necessarily mutually exclusive. I was a CPO in the US Navy—a submariner—before I went to college and earned my PhD in English, so I’m comfortable with both forms of communication. I also had a professor who was an excommunicated Jesuit priest. He understood a half-dozen dead languages and could curse in all of them.

    • eh, whatever
      eh, whatever
      September 28, 2024 at 12:37 am | # | Reply

      “I know a certain Israeli who is very knowledgeable in the Gmara. From time to time he curses in the most exquisite (Talmudic) Aramaic. The Hebrew-speaking listeners turn literally green: they understand they’re being cursed, some get what is said, but none respond in kind!”

    • Yvonne
      Yvonne
      September 28, 2024 at 7:48 pm | # | Reply

      Engineering classes in colleges are taught by graduate students, mostly.

      Professors have professional obligations regarding the dignity of the proceedings, but grad students do not.

      … the typical undergraduate engineering class is simultaneously 70% advanced technical jargon and 40% profanity by volume. And yes, that means that a significant fraction of the technical jargon is technical jargon referencing or consisting of profanity.

  16. PedanticJerkass
    PedanticJerkass
    September 28, 2024 at 12:22 am | # | Reply

    Naomi is terrible, but at least she’s not, like, Blaine or Ross terrible. Or even Linda or Clint terrible. Maybe roughly Carol terrible? Then again, she didn’t sell Ethan’s childhood home for the purpose of giving the money to a horrid church (that we know of, anyway), so… no, not even Carol terrible.

    • Vukodlak
      Vukodlak
      September 28, 2024 at 12:23 am | # | Reply

      I guess in the bucket of turd parents, she managed to float to the top.

      • BarerMender
        BarerMender
        September 28, 2024 at 1:01 am | # | Reply

        Good one.

    • Daibhid C
      Daibhid C
      September 28, 2024 at 5:51 am | # | Reply

      I have absolutely no idea how one rates terrible parents. Is there, like, some kind of checklist you go through and then add up the ticks? Do some things score more points than others? Does Naomi get points because she’s specifically said she doesn’t want the child she’s prejudiced against to commit suicide, and Linda hasn’t commented on that topic either way?

      • Daibhid C
        Daibhid C
        September 28, 2024 at 5:52 am | # | Reply

        Wait, in my last sentence I used “get points” as a good thing because that’s how it’s usually used, even though the previous sentences were about “scoring” for every horrible parent thing.

        Strike that, reverse it, carry on.

        • Mark
          Mark
          September 28, 2024 at 7:22 am | # | Reply

          Well, the Davenport Terrible Parenting Inventory has positive and negative elements. It all figures into the scores.

    • thejeff
      thejeff
      September 28, 2024 at 10:13 am | # | Reply

      I’d say Carol’s on the Linda tier. That house wasn’t just sold to finance a generic horrible church, but to help cover the money lost over Ross’s bail bond.

      We’d thought this appearance was going to be an opportunity for Naomi to move into worse territory, making up for her lack of major plotlines so far, but I’d say she’s basically holding steady, maybe even improving a little.

      • Yumi
        Yumi
        September 28, 2024 at 11:39 am | # | Reply

        I’d put Carol below Linda, personally. Carol’s not racist to her own children, but that’s because her children are white, and I’d fully expect her to treat her kids’ partners and children differently based on race. Meanwhile, Linda doesn’t support people who threaten or inflict physical harm on her children.

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          September 28, 2024 at 3:51 pm | # | Reply

          This is an interesting comparison, if we use what we know about each character. Linda’s shown to be vindictive to people who harm her kids (or even endanger them by implication), whereas Carol directly helped pay to free the guy who pointed a gun at her daughter with full intent to fire if she didn’t comply with his terroristic demands. Both of them have conditional love with limp excuses for it, but I guess at least Linda hasn’t directly contributed to her child being harmed.

          I know Sal’s hand getting stabbed is directly related to Linda’s financial and emotional abuse and bigotry, which led to Sal doing something pretty drastic, which led to lots of shit, and then Linda put Sal in a shitty Tennessee school where she was out of sight and mind, of course. But that’s much more of a domino effect than Carol’s funding of a known militant zealot, with full knowledge he’d harm someone, resulting in him harming people even worse than his first offense. Less steps between the first and last domino, anyway.

          It’s also interesting to me that both mom characters’ worst parental actions have a strong financial angle. Carol funding a known terrorist, Linda stealing money meant to help heal a disadvantaged person, they both suck and cause harm, both to their own child and others, just in different ways.

  17. RassilonTDavros
    RassilonTDavros
    September 28, 2024 at 12:23 am | # | Reply

    Can’t wait for Dina and Charlie to inexplicably be inside the closet with Asher when the door opens, leaving Naomi to think Ethan’s hosting some kind of orgy.

    • Dday
      Dday
      September 28, 2024 at 12:39 am | # | Reply

      Ethan walks up to the door and Naomi braces herself for 12 Chippendales dudes to march out like a clown car.

  18. Taffy
    Taffy
    September 28, 2024 at 12:27 am | # | Reply

    Son, why do you have so many details prepared for this hypothetical? Damn teenagers and their increasingly specific sarcasm.

  19. Throwatron
    Throwatron
    September 28, 2024 at 12:27 am | # | Reply

    wait, has ethan finally run out of fucks to give? this could be spectacular

    • thejeff
      thejeff
      September 28, 2024 at 10:15 am | # | Reply

      Ethan has only run out of metaphorical fucks to give.

      And conveniently, Asher’s right there in the literal closet.

  20. mindbleach
    mindbleach
    September 28, 2024 at 12:29 am | # | Reply

    Now THERE’S a book title.

    • Newlland(Henryvolt)
      Newlland(Henryvolt)
      September 28, 2024 at 1:39 am | # | Reply

      Dumbing of age book # 15: I could, without incident retrieve my partner right now from his hiding space in my closet two feet behind you?

  21. Dday
    Dday
    September 28, 2024 at 12:37 am | # | Reply

    Colored my drawings from yesterday.
    To reiterate, SFW but egregious Butt’s Disease.
    https://i.imgur.com/0cBfQJI.png
    TBH not sure if this is really quite the body type Dave had in mind but we’ve barely really seen her so here ya go.

    • Bogeywoman
      Bogeywoman
      September 28, 2024 at 1:43 am | # | Reply

      It makes your avatar funnier ? may I share it on the FB fan page?

      • Dday
        Dday
        September 28, 2024 at 2:38 am | # | Reply

        Go fer it ? ?

      • Dday
        Dday
        September 28, 2024 at 1:09 pm | # | Reply

        Btw, could I get a link to that? I didn’t even realize there was a fan FB page

  22. Serendipity
    Serendipity
    September 28, 2024 at 12:43 am | # | Reply

    She is literally saying it isn’t okay to be both gay and happy.

  23. Dean
    Dean
    September 28, 2024 at 12:52 am | # | Reply

    Careful Ethan, this permission clearly ISN’T retroactive.

    • Yumi
      Yumi
      September 28, 2024 at 11:55 am | # | Reply

      Yeah, but what’s she going to say? “He was clearly here already.” “Yeah, but he was in the closet. I thought that’s where you wanted queer people to be.”

  24. Zamperla
    Zamperla
    September 28, 2024 at 12:57 am | # | Reply

    “Until you’re feeling better anyway.” then the compulsive heterosexuality is back on the menu!

  25. Newlland(Henryvolt)
    Newlland(Henryvolt)
    September 28, 2024 at 1:24 am | # | Reply

    I will give Naomi this she’s better the Becky’s dad. If Toedad had come to this Epiphany himself maybe he’d still alive and so many wouldn’t be traumatized.

    • Daibhid C
      Daibhid C
      September 28, 2024 at 5:54 am | # | Reply

      Becky wasn’t suicidal, though. We don’t know how Toedad would have reacted to that. I mean, probably not like this, but we don’t know.

  26. IntangibleMatter
    IntangibleMatter
    September 28, 2024 at 1:25 am | # | Reply

    I’m looking forward to the meeting of Naomi and Asher

  27. Bogeywoman
    Bogeywoman
    September 28, 2024 at 1:41 am | # | Reply

    Yknow, the past couple strips have given her marriage DADT vibes

  28. DiDi
    DiDi
    September 28, 2024 at 1:57 am | # | Reply

    “Until you’re feeling better, anyway.”

    *sighs* And her potential for change is lost.

    • Daibhid C
      Daibhid C
      September 28, 2024 at 5:56 am | # | Reply

      Can’t lose what was never there. She’s just reterating what she said yesterday.

    • HueSatLight
      HueSatLight
      September 28, 2024 at 12:53 pm | # | Reply

      potential means it hasn’t happened yet. her not changing yet doesn’t mean she doesn’t have that potential.

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      September 28, 2024 at 3:38 pm | # | Reply

      I can’t believe Naomi is fucking dead.

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        September 28, 2024 at 7:35 pm | # | Reply

        I think Necrophilia is A Bridge Too Far even for Naomi.

  29. Council
    Council
    September 28, 2024 at 2:09 am | # | Reply

    Naomi is welcome to stay as a recurring villain. She maintains the bar for vileness the other antagonists have set, And she gets to have good lines.

    I’m not one of those people who think Mary and the like are clownish caricatures. Because I am on the internet and looked around for a minute. But they are less interesting, fictional or not.

    • Jeremiah
      Jeremiah
      September 28, 2024 at 10:16 am | # | Reply

      I don’t think I’m this context she counts as a villain or antagonist.

  30. goggleman64
    goggleman64
    September 28, 2024 at 2:10 am | # | Reply

    OH SHIT MY LEXICAL DAWGS, WE GOT A WILD ****PORTENTIOUS****

    • eh, whatever
      eh, whatever
      September 28, 2024 at 6:26 am | # | Reply

      …no, we got a wild portentous.

      See also: mischievous, which lots of people fantasize an extra i into.

      • Mark
        Mark
        September 28, 2024 at 7:31 am | # | Reply

        The way I usually hear it, they just move the existing “i”: “mischevious”.

  31. Mr. Random
    Mr. Random
    September 28, 2024 at 2:33 am | # | Reply

    Oh…
    She’s fully of the opinion that Ethan is close to ending things.
    And she is willing to allow pretty much anything.
    The fact that Ethan is just completely skating past that implication… explicit implication? Is also very worrying.

    • Bash
      Bash
      September 28, 2024 at 4:08 am | # | Reply

      I think he’s just dealing with the least upsetting part of all this first, and taking the chance to mess with her a bit.

    • anonymsly
      anonymsly
      September 28, 2024 at 6:47 am | # | Reply

      Why would Ethan push back against the one thing that’s made his mom even pretend to be in the sam large regional area of supportive or accepting? Naomi has actively de-incentivized arguing with her about how badly-off he is.

      (Though of course I hope this strip is the opening to something like “while I do appreciate that you find my existence as a person slightly preferable to my existence as a corpse, I was already gay before you ‘allowed’ it, and I will continue to be gay after you stop doing so. So… thanks for visiting, Mom. Warn me next time. Asher, say goodbye to my mom.” “Bye, Mrs. Siegel.”)

  32. anon
    anon
    September 28, 2024 at 2:33 am | # | Reply

    inb4 she’s familiar with asher’s family/’reputation’. tho if she knew he was also involved with sal stabbed by amber that would make me think ethan’s /more/ suicidal if i was her lol

    • Arianod
      Arianod
      September 28, 2024 at 7:04 am | # | Reply

      “OK, NOPE. You can be gay, but you can’t date the Mob.”

      • anon
        anon
        September 28, 2024 at 4:42 pm | # | Reply

        IDK if asher will officially join his ‘family’ but i’d think some ppl would back down to that like “You’re gonna tell a mobster he can’t be gay?”

        But i wouldn’t be surprised if she wanted a more ‘tame’ looking ‘presentable/acceptable’ type of gay or so

        Nothing wrong with being ‘boring’ and such but i can totally imagine ppl wanting their kid to be with like, some average joe/everyman “file clerk with a savings account since their teens who considers drinking a cocktail at the end of every month ‘exciting'” or some kinda stereotype

  33. Reltzik
    Reltzik
    September 28, 2024 at 2:43 am | # | Reply

    I do not like this woman, I do not thing she is a good role model to emulate, and nevertheless I shall be adding her panel 7 quote to the list of phrases I often repeat.

    • Opus the Poet
      Opus the Poet
      September 28, 2024 at 7:41 pm | # | Reply

      “I do not loke her said Sam Iam.
      I like her less than green eggs and Ham.”

  34. Da Boy
    Da Boy
    September 28, 2024 at 4:29 am | # | Reply

    Would be so funny if Asher decided to be dramatic and leapt like a ballerina out of the closet wearing nothing but his underwear.

  35. Michael Teegarden
    Michael Teegarden
    September 28, 2024 at 6:37 am | # | Reply

    Ahhh, yesss, one of the best DoA book titles of all time. ALL time!

    “Your Hypothetical Is Detailed In A Way That I’m Finding Portentous.”

    😀

  36. Mark
    Mark
    September 28, 2024 at 7:35 am | # | Reply

    She doesn’t hear it, Ethan. You’re gonna have to say it plainly.

  37. morleuca
    morleuca
    September 28, 2024 at 7:38 am | # | Reply

    Ethan, I love. Don’t ever change. I mean, keep getting better, but don’t ever lose that spark, m’man

  38. thumb
    thumb
    September 28, 2024 at 7:52 am | # | Reply

    “Until you’re feeling better.”

    Oh well, queue sudden confrontation that can go a lot of ways, awkward being the most positive.

  39. stePH
    stePH
    September 28, 2024 at 9:55 am | # | Reply

    I can’t remember… are there any parents in DoA who AREN’T toxic?

    • bcb
      bcb
      September 28, 2024 at 10:00 am | # | Reply

      Dina’s parents, Dorothy’s parents, Amber’s mom, and post-development Joyce’s Dad all seem pretty good.

    • Da Boy
      Da Boy
      September 28, 2024 at 10:02 am | # | Reply

      This question is quite funny when asked with Dotty’s avatar XD Aside from hers… I dunno Mike’s were nice I think? And Amber’s mom is cool though kind of a doormat. We haven’t seen Ruth’s but they supported her so we can assume they are good. Joyce Dad is/is starting to be okay?

      • NickG
        NickG
        September 28, 2024 at 12:54 pm | # | Reply

        Do you mean Carla’s parents, Ruth’s parents are dead.

        • Da Boy
          Da Boy
          September 28, 2024 at 1:36 pm | # | Reply

          AH! Yeah, yeah Carla’s parents, somehow my brain mixed them up.

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          September 28, 2024 at 3:33 pm | # | Reply

          I guess it’s hard to be any kind of parent when you’re dead. Besides a dead parent, that is. Like, your parenting quality can’t be bad or good since you’re off the hook entirely.

          Come to think of it, could we call a sperm/egg donor a bad/good parent if they’re completely uninvolved and the one(s) raising the kid never tried to involve them beyond the genes? It’s basically the same as being dead at that point, yeah?

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      September 28, 2024 at 10:11 am | # | Reply

      We haven’t seen much of Sierra’s parents but what little we did see of them seemed good.

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        September 28, 2024 at 3:37 pm | # | Reply

        Sierra’s dad ordered Blaine’s execution. He has very indirect mob ties, in that he knows a guy who knows a guy, and the known guy introduced him to the other guy, at which point the dad guy paid the other guy $20 and a Lunchable to have his dirty cop buddy kill Blaine.

        • Da Boy
          Da Boy
          September 28, 2024 at 4:02 pm | # | Reply

          Blaine is definitely a guy who’d get a “Hell I’d kill you for half a sandwich and a klondike ice-cream bar.” reaction from someon.

      • anon
        anon
        September 28, 2024 at 5:28 pm | # | Reply

        isn’t sierra the one who goes barefoot all the time? either she has supportive parents or they don’t care/gave up on that. (although feels like there’d be a limit, it’s one thing to be comfortable in a dorm room and such but you’d think there’d be a hygiene/risk/injury issue about walking barefoot in public)

        • thejeff
          thejeff
          September 28, 2024 at 6:51 pm | # | Reply

          I went barefoot a lot in college. Still do sometimes, to a much lesser extent.

          It’s just not that big a deal. Your soles toughen up. We evolved barefoot, after all.

    • Joyfulldreams
      Joyfulldreams
      September 28, 2024 at 11:49 am | # | Reply

      I have a feeling Ethan’s dad is probably fine. Just gay and closeted.

  40. bcb
    bcb
    September 28, 2024 at 9:59 am | # | Reply

    Oh my Cheese I love Ethan!

  41. Amelie Wikström
    Amelie Wikström
    September 28, 2024 at 9:59 am | # | Reply

    Hooray, conditional tolerance! Should we read that as “Once you feel good I’ll go back to despising who you are” or “Once you feel good I expect you to like girls again”?

  42. Dana W
    Dana W
    September 28, 2024 at 10:01 am | # | Reply

    But ONLY till you are feeling better! Don’t go getting used to it!

    • Vulcanodon
      Vulcanodon
      September 28, 2024 at 1:26 pm | # | Reply

      Reality isn’t exactly soaking in; it’s more like very slow leakage

  43. Mr.Morningstar
    Mr.Morningstar
    September 28, 2024 at 11:58 am | # | Reply

    Okay the whole “until you’re feeling better” is gross but…

    It strikes me as “I am absolutely terrible at admitting I’m wrong so I’m going to hold one thing in this”

    Still shit but I’ve seen many a mother act like this before fully embracing it.

    Also in shortpacked she got over it so I’m open to the idea that she will here too

  44. BarerMender
    BarerMender
    September 28, 2024 at 1:04 pm | # | Reply

    I’ll be darned. I always thought that word was por-tent-yus. I just now noticed it’s por-tent-us. Wait, let me check. Yep, Webster agrees. How did I go so long? I must’ve never heard it pronounced.

    • Amelie Wikström
      Amelie Wikström
      September 28, 2024 at 1:16 pm | # | Reply

      Hot damn, she’s back! More nefarious and ne’er-do-wellian than ever. And possibly owning a time machine.

    • Dday
      Dday
      September 28, 2024 at 1:59 pm | # | Reply

      por-ten-chiss

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        September 28, 2024 at 3:29 pm | # | Reply

        Where’s the CH come from? There’s no I.

      • BarerMender
        BarerMender
        September 29, 2024 at 6:13 am | # | Reply

        Nope. Por-ten-tus. Ask Mr. Webster. No alternate pronunciation given.

  45. HueSatLight
    HueSatLight
    September 28, 2024 at 1:55 pm | # | Reply

    Ethan called Asher his partner. ♥

    • HueSatLight
      HueSatLight
      September 28, 2024 at 1:55 pm | # | Reply

      hypothetically

      • BarerMender
        BarerMender
        September 29, 2024 at 6:18 am | # | Reply

        Portentously, even.

  46. Felian
    Felian
    September 28, 2024 at 4:49 pm | # | Reply

    “until you are feeling better“ so….. she does not actually encourage him to get better….. would i rather be gay and depressed or straight-acting and …. actually, still depressed. Welll…..

  47. Felian
    Felian
    September 28, 2024 at 4:51 pm | # | Reply

    If i were Asher in this situation, not sure if i’d want to come out of the literal closet after overhearing all this, or piss off to Narnia through the back of the closet.

    • GLaDOS
      GLaDOS
      September 28, 2024 at 5:33 pm | # | Reply

      Now I’m imagining Ethan opening the closet door and Aslan jumping out.

  48. Rabisch
    Rabisch
    September 28, 2024 at 6:27 pm | # | Reply

    She’s bad, but still way better than Joyce’s mother.

    • NGPZ
      NGPZ
      September 28, 2024 at 7:42 pm | # | Reply

      let’s be real here, that’s the low fuckin’ bar to hurdle,
      this momma still make ya queasy like milk all curdle
      puttin up with that bongo ain’t easy
      serves her right our brotha gonna get all sleazy
      with Asher blowin’ each other like a storm all breezy
      or my name ain’t NGPZ

    • Yvonne
      Yvonne
      September 28, 2024 at 7:43 pm | # | Reply

      You can be pretty emotionally insensitive and not good at connecting with your kids without hitting the bar set by “literally unwilling to protect your children from actual danger to their physical lives”, yes.

      I’m not sure we should be setting the bar there, as unfortunately real as the second group somehow is, in defiance of what I would have considered basic logic (because if that’s how you feel, y’know, why even have kids).

  49. Mo
    Mo
    September 29, 2024 at 3:32 pm | # | Reply

    Naomi is one erudite motherfucker

  50. Yakumo
    Yakumo
    October 1, 2024 at 2:49 pm | # | Reply

    So true alt-text. Didn’t notice until I read you, but so true.

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