Whatever gets the crazy lady out of your room, right Mike? ^_^
(Me, I would have just said “Mind closing the door? I’m changing my clothes”. Either she clues in and leaves, or my morning gets much more interesting.)
His ultimate target is Dorothy. He must prevent her from obtaining any position in government so that Galasso can TAKE OVER THE WORLD. In such a world Mike’s assholery would be made ifinitely more effective. This way, Mike can be certain that when he dies, humanity will build statues in his image to remind people of what an asshole he is, and his assholishness will last forever.
To get Dorothy to personally intervene and disrobe Walky in front of Danny to prove to him that there is indeed a man made of caramel who currently has no shoes.
I’d just thought that Mike was trying to increase the maximum amount of awkwardness/sufffering in this scene while under the pretense of being a good friend (and partially because he actually likes Walky <3).
But your idea makes much more sense. On the other hand, your idea makes more sense, so maybe it's wrong and Mike's just a dick.
He’s still a dick in this universe but it seems to be more of a ‘tough love’ approach. Attending the gender studies class got Dorothy to stop trying to hide Walky and show she did care.
Going by Audiophillie’s theory, that’d mean his goal is probably to get Walky to confront this awkward moment, get past it and get the shoes.
He wants Walky to get the shoes from Danny with no fuss because he knows that later on Danny will find out the truth and be hurt far more by the charade and thee length of his ignorance than anything that could happen today.
Mike’s dastardliness is even in his name. It stands for Motherly Intercourse Knickle Enterprise.
CWR
I thought you were about to make the Mike Hunt joke. Then I thought you were referencing the Monty Python and the Holy Grail French castle joke (which none of my friends figured out and I only realized what was up decades later, despite dozens of non-stoned viewings). Then I thought…man, I really overthink the hell out of things.
Mike works kind of like a lot of chaotic planners that way. Each step does lead towards a larger success, but each step is itself a success not at all contingent on any other successes. Think of it like each action is a Jerk-Thread. At a later date he can assemble these Jerk-Threads into a Jerk-Tapestry if all goes well, but if a couple threads get lost in the mix he can still make a Jerk-Rug or a Jerk-Scarf or some Jerk-Mittens or a humble Jerk-Handkerchief or maybe some Jerk-Teacozies or failing any of that he’s still got a ball of Jerk-Yarn that was pretty fun to make in its own right. Not like he lost anything because he didn’t get to make that cool tapestry.
I once shipped my stapler with my coffee mug. Yes, I know the mug is in a relationship with the pencil sharpener, but I choose to ignore that in my personal canon.
The pencil sharpener is a slut. Cheating on the mug ten times a day , multiple penetrations with other household objects.
What kind of message does that send to our children, I ask you? Wholesome fiction supports love and fidelity–and looks down on abuseive relationships full of lies!
I ship coffee mug and stapler forever.
Flynn
Gee, talk about double standards!So if you’re penetrated a lot, you’re a slut, but if you go around penetrating other things, you’re a decent upstanding piece of stationery? Perhaps the mug should go talk to some of the discarded paper the stapler has heartlessly used and abandoned.
DaJoshMaster
What kind of a world forces poor sharpeners to hide their sexual desires just because we see it as “slutty? The rubbish kind!
I ship sharpener x whatever pencil she want!
AsimovSideburns
Oh, but the stapler can get with as many pieces of paper as he wants?
The tribulation revelation is not what you’d think
Nothing of pathfinding is ready for link
Look! Look deeper in the plans that are thus
A second intention is brimmed with the such
Never let your expectation e’er begin to rust
Or our blonde friend will have you reeling too much
122 thoughts on “Waving”
Wack'd
Okay, I did not see that coming.
Mogotoo
I actually read Mike’s bubble in panel 2 and thought he was just saying that Dorothy was dating Walky. Took me a second read to get it right.
AckAckAck
Our brain set for different ending. Time to reset it.
Resne
Booting from drive “Mike is a sly motherfucker.”
…
You MAGNIFICENT BASTARD.
Aizat
I READ YOUR BOOK!
Tucker
“It’s part of a greater plan to slowly drive him insane.”
/Sealab
Scout
I did.
First Amber in Shortpacked
then Dorothy in DOA? Just like Willis… he has a type 😛
Hinoron
Whatever gets the crazy lady out of your room, right Mike? ^_^
(Me, I would have just said “Mind closing the door? I’m changing my clothes”. Either she clues in and leaves, or my morning gets much more interesting.)
David Herbert
Okay, theories on what Mike’s overall plan for this is go.
Squidiggles
His ultimate target is Dorothy. He must prevent her from obtaining any position in government so that Galasso can TAKE OVER THE WORLD. In such a world Mike’s assholery would be made ifinitely more effective. This way, Mike can be certain that when he dies, humanity will build statues in his image to remind people of what an asshole he is, and his assholishness will last forever.
GenericScreenName101
To get Dorothy to personally intervene and disrobe Walky in front of Danny to prove to him that there is indeed a man made of caramel who currently has no shoes.
Audiophillie
I think he’s trying to get Walky to say that he’s the one dating Dorothy. That’s all I got so far.
Groove
I’d just thought that Mike was trying to increase the maximum amount of awkwardness/sufffering in this scene while under the pretense of being a good friend (and partially because he actually likes Walky <3).
But your idea makes much more sense. On the other hand, your idea makes more sense, so maybe it's wrong and Mike's just a dick.
David Herbert
He’s still a dick in this universe but it seems to be more of a ‘tough love’ approach. Attending the gender studies class got Dorothy to stop trying to hide Walky and show she did care.
Going by Audiophillie’s theory, that’d mean his goal is probably to get Walky to confront this awkward moment, get past it and get the shoes.
Steven
I think he’s helping Danny by inciting his rage against Dorothy, enabling him to move on.
DaJoshMaster
Joyce dear… Mike’s a Dick. 😛
Steven
You stole both my name AND my gravatar.
Unless gravatars have changed now…
Geegles
He wants to confuse Dorothy so he can have Walky to himself.
Plasma Mongoose
He wants all of that caramel to himself.
Rowen Morland
He wants Walky to get the shoes from Danny with no fuss because he knows that later on Danny will find out the truth and be hurt far more by the charade and thee length of his ignorance than anything that could happen today.
Kryss LaBryn
Yeah, I think you’ve got it.
Kaci
I think it’s Supermike to the rescue of awkward situation by amping up the awkward in a new and exciting way!
penguintruth
His plan?
Pain. Pain is his plan.
Some men just want to watch the world whimper.
Kintrex
I think he’s just mad that Dorothy chose his room to duck into.
Yotomoe
Mike is such a gigantic asshole.
Aizat
Or he’s covering for Walky. Danny might look relatively harmless but it’s the harmless guys that you just have to watch out for.
Yotomoe
Are you insinuating that Mike is helping someone!? Send this man into the hole! He’s clearly not sane!
Aizat
Well, Mike usually has a hidden agenda of some sort so his “help” might be a double edged blade.
Wonder Wig
Mike’s dastardliness is even in his name. It stands for Motherly Intercourse Knickle Enterprise.
CWR
I thought you were about to make the Mike Hunt joke. Then I thought you were referencing the Monty Python and the Holy Grail French castle joke (which none of my friends figured out and I only realized what was up decades later, despite dozens of non-stoned viewings). Then I thought…man, I really overthink the hell out of things.
Tristan J
The question is, is this a means to an end or a goal in itself?
Bekah
For Mike, the means is the goal.
gangler
Mike works kind of like a lot of chaotic planners that way. Each step does lead towards a larger success, but each step is itself a success not at all contingent on any other successes. Think of it like each action is a Jerk-Thread. At a later date he can assemble these Jerk-Threads into a Jerk-Tapestry if all goes well, but if a couple threads get lost in the mix he can still make a Jerk-Rug or a Jerk-Scarf or some Jerk-Mittens or a humble Jerk-Handkerchief or maybe some Jerk-Teacozies or failing any of that he’s still got a ball of Jerk-Yarn that was pretty fun to make in its own right. Not like he lost anything because he didn’t get to make that cool tapestry.
J-Dawg
This ^. A thousand times, this.
Historyman68
You need to write a children’s book.
Tristan J
I am in awe of you right now.
Kernanator
This is quite possibly the best metaphor ever.
Yotomoe
and appropriate gravitar to boot.
CWR
I think the Jerk-Hankerchief is simply referred to as a jerkerchief – that’s it’s ‘street name’.
Yo.
Egg
Would you like your marriage proposal to be conveyed by airmail or dancing elf courier squad?
hinoteoni
Nice
Sensedog
And…the agent of chaos strikes again.
Mike’d.
Aizat
Mike Warner, Agent of C.H.A.O.S.
Jeff K!
David Walkerton, Agent of C.A.R.A.M.E.L.
an ancient indian burial ground
Just when you think you have Mike figured out…you don’t have Mike figured out. Yeah. That’s all I’ve got, sorry.
TaZZerath
O hai Dorothy!
Aizat
How’s you’re sex life?
Yotomoe
Stop standing back there like a chicken:
cheep cheep cheep cheeeeEEEeeEEep.
Aizat
That’s a funny story, Yotomoe.
Doctor_Who
Danny’s reaction to this news: “Evvybody betray me! I’m fed up with this whorl!”
Wonder Wig
It seems that Mike is an eeexpert.
Originalslugboy
And then Billie ended up in a hospital on Guerrero Street.
Aizat
Hahaha. What a story, Originalslugboy.
Julian
What are you talking about? I just saw you.
Aizat
You are tearing me apart, Julian.
Gnoka
I can ship it.
Aizat
To shippers, you can ship anyone with anyone. Heck, they would ship two characters just because he/she said hi to the other person.
Doctor_Who
I once shipped my stapler with my coffee mug. Yes, I know the mug is in a relationship with the pencil sharpener, but I choose to ignore that in my personal canon.
Historyman68
Stop pressuring them. They’ll never live up to your expectations.
Yotomoe
Staple Remover x Paper Clip holder forever!
Originalslugboy
The mug is only dating the pencil sharpener to begin with because Joe Quesada used the Robot Devil to eliminate his marriage to the mouse pad.
Andiemus
Hahahahahaha! Comment of the year nominee.
Petre Pan
The pencil sharpener is a slut. Cheating on the mug ten times a day , multiple penetrations with other household objects.
What kind of message does that send to our children, I ask you? Wholesome fiction supports love and fidelity–and looks down on abuseive relationships full of lies!
I ship coffee mug and stapler forever.
Flynn
Gee, talk about double standards!So if you’re penetrated a lot, you’re a slut, but if you go around penetrating other things, you’re a decent upstanding piece of stationery? Perhaps the mug should go talk to some of the discarded paper the stapler has heartlessly used and abandoned.
DaJoshMaster
What kind of a world forces poor sharpeners to hide their sexual desires just because we see it as “slutty? The rubbish kind!
I ship sharpener x whatever pencil she want!
AsimovSideburns
Oh, but the stapler can get with as many pieces of paper as he wants?
Jim
The tribulation revelation is not what you’d think
Nothing of pathfinding is ready for link
Look! Look deeper in the plans that are thus
A second intention is brimmed with the such
Never let your expectation e’er begin to rust
Or our blonde friend will have you reeling too much
Aizat
Did you just make Mike into an Eldritch Abomination?
madock345
I think Mike did that.
AckAckAck
Does he really need all those extra tentacles?
CWR
Extra tentacles are a feature, not a bug.
Unless you are Yuki.
Kryss LaBryn
Okay, so why in the hell did I misread “tentacles” as “testicles”?