139

Weave
Posted on October 26, 2012 by David M Willis

139 thoughts on “Weave”

  1. Wonder Wig

    Danny makes all the adults in The Fairly Odd Parents seem alert and observant.

    1. Aizat

      Adults seems alert and observant? DINKLEBURG!

      1. ThatRobedGuy

        God, I wish I could Like this reply! Excellent.

        1. Bugberry

          you’d use the like button, IF YOU HAD ONE!

    2. Davidus Rex

      Butch Hartman seems to think all adults are almost fatally dense.

      1. Volkai

        See also: Butch Harman seems to have paid any attention to politics in the past decade.

        1. Kernanator

          Isn’t it funny how leaving out one word can change the entire meaning of a sentence.

    3. Jetstream

      Crocker would be all over this mystery!

  2. Joe H

    Oh Dan, Dan, Danny Boy.

    1. David Herbert

      The pipes, the pipes are calling.

      1. Geegles

        From glen to glen, and down the mountainside…

        1. Raoullefere

          The summer’s GOOOONNNNEEEE, and all the flowers dy-ah-ying

        2. Whittier

          ‘Tis you, ’tis you, must go and I must bide.

    2. Amaziboy

      Oh Danny boy, the pipes are calling.

    3. Plasma Mongoose

      You’re not going to sing now. are you?

      1. NCP19

        Too late

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          You can blame my lagging ISP for that.

    4. rachel

      Oh bleeegh, your comment hilariously makes me think of The Room.

  3. Kafloobop

    HMMMM REALLY DANNY? YA DON’T SAY?

    1. Aizat

      *Insert Nicholas Cage face here*

      1. marr

        *Insert Alanis Morrisette singing Ironic behind them*

        1. Originalslugboy

          *insert entire internets bemoaning Alanis Morrisette’s lack of unserstanding the word “ironic” behind that*

        2. ArkhamTexan

          This image is getting crowded.

        3. xKiv

          Insert a nerd commenting that it’s ironic when a song named Ironic does not have anything ironic in it.

        4. Rex Hondo

          Insert the android Norman breaking down via logic bomb.

        5. Andiemus

          Insert an English major pointing out that there are many types of irony.

  4. Yotomoe

    Oh Danny. You’re luck you’re cute.

    1. Archtus

      Oh Yotomoe. You’re luck you’re funny.

      Or we’d be pointing out the obvious spelling error.

      1. AckAckAck

        Oh Archtus, you’re lucky your avatar is cute.

        Or we’d be pointing out the grammar nazi-ness of your comment.

        1. begbert2

          Oh, AckAckAck, you’re lucky you have a Dorothy gravatar.

          I mean, it’s really a nice gravatar. Look at it there.

        2. GrrArg42

          Oh begbert2 you’re lucky you used to date Joe.

          Or he would have a pool going for when you and AckAckAck make out. I mean how weird would that be?

  5. Plasma Mongoose

    Great observation Danny. 😀

  6. GenericScreenName101

    The amazing answer Amber will probably receive is along the lines “with great power comes little sleep and a lack of awareness of college social norms”

  7. Aizat

    Namely you, Danny.

  8. Doctor_Who

    In all fairness to Danny, it’s not like anyone else has figured it out. Billie think’s it’s Sal, and she got a better look at both of them than he did.

    1. Squidiggles

      Okay, so assuming that Danny does not get outright told who Amazi-Girl is, who would have figured it out first, him or Billy?

      1. Raoullefere

        Remember that Dotty’s in this “Who’s Amazi-Girl” thing, too. All three are pretty clueless, each in his or her own way, but I’m going to go with Billie, provided she gets drunk enough. I think she gains special powers then.

        The other question is this: how will Joe react when his secret is uncovered?

        1. thomas0comer

          When did Joe find out about Dana’s alter-ego?

  9. Kernanator

    THIS IS DELICIOUS IRONY, YOU MUST EAT IT.

    1. Aizat

      WITH A SPOOOOOOOOOON!

      1. Tucker

        AND CUT IT WITH A KNIFE!

        1. Yotomoe

          And Burn it with Fire!

        2. Aizat

          AND THEN PUT THE ASHES IN A CAN!

        3. Wonder Wig

          AND THEN SNORT THE ASHES!

        4. Khrene

          No no you roll the ahes in a blunt ans smoke them. *Sigh* Some people.

        5. Originalslugboy

          AND THEN SOMETHING ABOUT YOUR FAAAAAAAAAAAACE!

        6. AckAckAck

          A chain this long and no “Your mom for a nickel” joke?

          Walkynauts, I’m disappoint.

        7. Jetstream

          I’ll be disappointed in your mom… for a nickel!

        8. begbert2

          To be fair, for that price you can’t exactly expect the premium service.

        9. Joey

          Premium service is a quarter.

        10. Wixvhen

          Or at least home made cookies.

        11. Mike

          I’m disappointed in your mom as much as when getting an oatmeal-raisin cookie, yet expecting chocolate chip.

        12. Rex Hondo

          AND MY AXE!

          Crap. Am I too late for the all-caps portion of the festivities?

  10. NCP19

    It’s his amazing attention to detail the probably led to his place on the third annual favorite poll.

  11. Aizat

    You know what’s funny? I’m half expecting some villain appearing out of no where.

    1. Yotomoe

      Nyohoho. I am PROFESSOR EXTREMO!

      1. Aizat

        Buzz off, Extremo. This is the domain of Shadow Man.

        1. Yotomoe

          You’ll be singing a different tune once the Killer Clarinet is through with you!

        2. Aizat

          Killer Clarinet? I shoved him down an elevator shaft 2 days ago.

        3. AckAckAck

          Master Grand Tuba?

        4. Wixvhen

          Axe Shredder?

        5. Raoullefere

          Buzz Cut, the Close-shorn Capering Criminal?

        6. thomas0comer

          Burnt Toast, the ruler of ruined food?

        7. Random Guy

          The Oatmeal-Raisin Cookie That Looks Like Chocolate-Chip.

  12. Uniqueantique

    I wonder how long he will set there waiting for Amazi Girl to show up.

    1. Aizat

      My guess? FOREVER!

    2. Ragnal

      It’s gonna be like Sally waiting for the Great Pumpkin with Linus.

      …please tell me that didn’t go over everyone’s heads.

      1. Kernanator

        I get it!

      2. Yotomoe

        I get it and I never saw that special.

      3. Aizat

        I got the reference and I’m pretty sure I’m not around when the special aired.

      4. Wack'd

        I got the reference because I read the damn comics!

        I am a better fan than all of you! I hereby revoke your Peanuts-merchandise owning privileges! You guys only owned that stuff to get attention from Peanuts fans anyway.

      5. tahrey

        Of course it didn’t. Peanuts is eternal.

        Though it was usually Charlie Brown and Lucy who got dragged out to the pumpkin patch wasn’t it?

        /30 years old
        /british
        /still gets it
        /probably because
        /parents had a few old paperback collections
        /good times

        1. taekwondogirl

          I don’t recall Lucy ever remotely putting up with that noise.

      6. Spazman

        I read “Sal waiting for the Great Pumpkin with Linus.”

        Willis, can we have this for Halloween? Pretty Please?

        1. Zaphod Beeblebrox

          Actually, I can see Joyce as a more likely candidate for pumpkin watching… and dragging Mike, Ethan, and Sierra along with her.

        2. Raoullefere

          Joyce is not going to be spending Harvest Festival seeking out misleading superstitions. The Devil uses Treats to Trick! (Saw that on a mobile billboard in front of a church yesterday)

        3. Andiemus

          That is great!

        4. AckAckAck

          Sounds like a Beatles song title….

      7. Kelly

        I can’t stand Peanuts!

        1. Jeff K!

          Stop those rhymes now, I mean it!

  13. WhiteEyedCat

    Oooh, Amber overtook Joyce on the poll, YAY AMBER!

  14. Joseph Harner

    But that was like…. YEARS AGO! How did you remember this, Danny? Does Willis-time not effect you? I want this super-power.

  15. Jason

    I’m calling it now. Amazi-Girl is Becky.

    1. AckAckAck

      Amazi-Girl is Joe.

      1. Wixvhen

        Amazi-Girl is Dina… And on a related subject, Amber is Dino-Girl.

  16. Undrave

    Most people are unobservant? UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE YEAR DANNY! People are FRACKIN’ BLIND!

    *Dude walks into convinience store, look at chocolate display at counter*”You don’t have any gum?”

    Yes, we’re a convinience TOTALLY ignoring the BIGGEST GROWTH MARKET in convinience store this side of jerky OFF COURSE WE GOT GUM! JUST LOOK AROUND YOU MORON IT’S NOT THAT HARD!

    “Where [inster title] magazine?”
    It’s right there! It’s the one where the vapid star on the front hides the FIRST LETTERS of the magazine’s name, you know the one with the same damn font for the last ten years or so!

    GAH! I could tel you guys stories! Lots of them!

    1. Batman1016

      I worked at Walmart back when COD:MW3 came out. We had three displays full of the game out on the floor. Big, four-sided, full size sales displays, one for each system. Didn’t matter. Got asked 36 times, “Hey, you got the new Modern Warfare?” THIRTY-SIX. One guy, as I was putting new copies on the mod, walked up to me from the other side, and asked me, OVER THE TOP OF THE DISPLAY CASE, if we had any. I looked at him as if he’d grown another head and literally just said, “Ok, dude?”

      To his credit, he immediately looked down, then jumped backwards and shouted, “Oh, CHRIST, I’m a @#$%ing MORON!!”

      1. Wack'd

        Thirty-six? Thirty-six guys asked you if you had the new Modern Warfare? What, does that include me?

        1. AckAckAck

          At least we know what kind of players Modern Warfare games had.

        2. Wixvhen

          And yet the moment you join them online they call you the moron for not seeing the guy in camo in the shadows that’s not on the radar who fires only one shot from a suppressed rifle to kill you.

        3. Raoullefere

          Which shows the real issue: people have priorities. My guess is we all have only so much attention to spread around (some less than others), and so we don’t ‘waste’ that attention on things we don’t need to. So these customers are budgeting their attention, reasoning that finding the gum or the game is what the people who work in the store are for. Actually, since frog’s brains have been shown to work that way, I guess there’s no reason for people’s not to, also, It’s just we can be selective about assigning out priorities.

          That’s Danny’s problem, too, by the way: his priority seems to be to have a relationship. not to pay attention to the girl he’s in the relationship with. There’s no other way to explain his dating Dotty for longer than a few months, if you want to be uncharitable (I do), or at the least realizing at some point before he chose this school that Dotty was going to ditch him.

        4. Random Guy

          Let’s face it, no one really wants to be omniscient, because people are gross.

        5. Wixvhen

          So very very true…

    2. Kernanator

      Much anger I sense in you.

    3. Wack'd

      Sorry, man, but I think Kevin Smith beat you to it.

      “How much is this thing, anyway?”

      1. Undrave

        God I love that bit. Story of my life.

      2. Plasma Mongoose

        Woops, I was thinking of the wrong Kevin Smith, the one who played Ares on Xena.

    4. tahrey

      I can put warning signs over mission-critical power switches that say “DO NOT TURN THIS SWITCH OFF EXCEPT IN CASE OF FIRE OR OTHER SITE EMERGENCY” and people will still lift it up, breaking the tape holding it down, in order to flip the switch off instead of going through the slightly more complicated shutdown procedure (i’m talking in terms of a need to push two, sometimes even three buttons) on the adjoining console. Obviously just seeing something that looks like a glowing power switch (maybe I need to put some paint or duct tape over the indicator neon?) and ripping away anything that gets in their path in order to flick it off.

      Rinse, repeat for a hundred other power switches and amplifiers around the place, along with a multitude of random devices that can be easily misused or tampered with by ignorant fingers around the place, that get the same treatment despite similar signs/warnings/stickers/obstructions…

      Then they wonder why stuff is broken the next time they come to use it.

      1. Cybersnark

        You need to train them. Just set up a bunch of traps connected to fake power switches and let Darwinism take its course.

      2. davidbreslin101

        From similar experiences, I’ve concluded that people fail to hear or read the word “NOT” about three times out of four.
        “I can do Wednesday but not Thursday.” “OK, what time on Thursday?”
        “But I’m NOT Amazi-Girl!” “Aha! I KNEW it!”
        (How many “not”s are there in this comment?)

        1. Regalli

          Four, including the “How many are there in this comment” one.

        2. begbert2

          There weren’t any until you asked about them, of course.

    5. Historyman68

      Is gum a growth industry? I thought that bubble would have popped by now.

      1. Notebooked

        [piano sting]

  17. Azukar

    “Pop a squat”?! Sounds kind of like a cutesy, childish way to say you sharted. “Did you hear me pop a squat just now? …yeah I need to go change”.

    1. tahrey

      Only if you’ve never heard anyone use it as a way of saying “take a seat” before. I’m familiar enough with it.

      1. CWR

        I’ve only heard ‘cop a squat’ – thought this was a typo. Like ‘cop an attitude’ or ‘cop a feel’…I hear ‘pop a squat’ and all I think of is ‘pop a wheelie’ or ‘pop a boner’.

        Not really synonyms to my tin ear.

    2. Ryorin

      I feel your confusion. I had never heard it before beginning college in the Mid-West. It’s a really bizarre turn of phrase to many and completely natural to others, leading to me staring blankly at others who stared blankly back. Five years later, I understand it but could never use it myself.

      I still have nightmares about its TRUE, dark meaning…

      1. Andiemus

        You hear it from working-class folks in California too.

        1. Kernanator

          Yeah, I think I’ve heard it once or twice.

  18. TheEqualizer

    Wild Mass Guess: Danny figures out Amber and Amazi-Girl are one and the same when he notices they have the same DS.

    1. Aizat

      WMG: Danny already knows who Amazi-Girl is and just playing dumb.

      1. hmrc4evr

        I suggested that last strip and the idea really didnt fly.

        1. thomas0comer

          :Fhkdslkfl;adj RUINED FOREVAR fd;slkfjasdlkfj;

          Am I close?

    2. tahrey

      WMG: In the highly unlikely event of Amber actually being Amazi-Girl, she will just quickly change the name of her Mii again, like we saw happen before.

      Amazi-Girl’s DS was pretty unremarkable, its only distinguishing marks being a particular case colour. Of which Nintendo have made millions in each shade.

  19. Gregory

    Love the irony in this strip.

  20. Uncle Rylon

    It’s nice to see the silver age superman stories being updated for the modern world. Lois & Clark was a nice stab at it, but it really went down hill after the first season.

  21. Rex Hondo

    My theory is that the portion of Danny’s brain that would be used to notice things has one of the seals that keeps DAB out of their reality locked away inside it. If he ever actually notices that Amber and Amazi-Girl are one and the same, their world will start to deteriorate into madness and horror.

    1. tahrey

      OK, I know digital radio is pretty terrible at the best of times, but an eldritch abomination it is not. And as it exists in this world, does that mean we’re doomed? You’re going to have to explain this one to us.

      1. Null Set

        http://www.shortpacked.com/2011/comic/book-13/05-the-death-of-snkrs/dab/

    2. Regalli

      Quick! HIDE THE UROSITE! YOU HAVE SUMMONED DAB ONTO OUR PLANE OF REALITY! WE’RE ALL DOOMED, YOU- PRAISE BE TO DAB.

  22. tahrey

    I’m getting such a massive sense of deja vu off this strip – has this exchange happened somewhere else as well?! Including follow on comments?

    Also, “POP a squat”? I always thought it was “COP”… :-/

  23. tahrey

    Do have to wonder, though – what’s with the Theta logo on his hoodie? It’s presumably not a fraternity thing, and it arguably predates the rise of USB… so, why?

    1. Jackson

      That’s just the IU logo. It kinda looks like a theta sometimes when obscured by a word bubble or wrinkles, but panel 1 offers a decent view of it. And you can see from the upper half of it in this strip that it’s not a theta. Hope that helps!

      1. Random832

        I don’t see how anyone could think it looks like a theta. It looks like a psi.

  24. Jackson

    Geez Louise, Amber, just tell the guy. Put the info to his head and put him out of his obliviousness.

    1. AckAckAck

      Then lose the magic? I prefer the secrecy. Like Lois and Supes, that guy and Wonder Woman.

      Okay I don’t really like that guy and Wonder Woman pairing. They are stupid. Good thing DC got rid of that guy I don’t even remember his name.

  25. 13thprotector

    Unobservant? Then he must blinder than a bat if he hasn’t caught it yet!

    1. thomas0comer

      Isn’t it funny how leaving out one word can entirely change the of a sentence?

  26. G.G.

    I would have called this one unobservant. things will get interesting

  27. Roborat

    Holy irony Batman!

  28. Ray

    To be fair, it’s pretty well established by brain scientists that “observant” is a relative term. There’s too much sensory input for the brain to track everything so it makes a lot of shortcuts and assumptions based on context, priority, and expectations.

    Clark Kent most likely really could get away with using only glasses for a disguise, that is except for his Daily Planet co-workers, since they frequently encounter both Clark and Superman.

    1. Rex Hondo

      It’s that attention to detail by its entire staff that makes the Daily Planet the most trusted and respected news organization on the east coast. 😛

      1. Uncle Rylon

        East coast? It’s the Daily Planet. It’s the most trusted and respected news organization on the planet.

        1. David

          The way things are going, it’ll be the ONLY news organization on the planet.

        2. Aydr

          I like how they pretended Clark quit so that he could voice the truth rather than he was fired.

    2. Rex Hondo

      Or maybe the writers and artists just don’t show how he amnesia-kisses everybody who figures it out. Clark giving a lot of inappropriate kisses around the office is probably why he was “given the option to resign.”

  29. rachel

    GAH this is just the cutest comic, I bet it DOES help, Danny!!

    1. DarkoNeko

      Yes. Yes it does.

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