210

Weenus
Posted on February 16, 2014 by David M Willis

210 thoughts on “Weenus”

  1. TheOthin

    WALKY PAY ATTENTION

    1. Genera

      He’s paying attention… to his weenus.

    2. Skull025

      YOU MISSED SOMETHING WITH YOUR WEENUS. POINT.

      1. The Red Moth

        Stop talking to yourself, Joe…

        1. AgentKeen

          Aww, you ruined it. I was hoping for just one big string of Joes.

          (The hilarity that I’m currently a Danny commenting on wanting a bunch of Joes isn’t lost on me.)

        2. Skull025

          GOD DAMN IT DANNY WE HAD A GOOD THING GOING WHY’D YOU DANNY IT UP!?

        3. Levi

          He Dan’d it hard.

        4. Barf Ninjason

          So are we just going to ignore that it was Walky who broke the string of Joes?

        5. Jackson

          Why pass up a perfectly good opportunity to blame Danny for it?

        6. Keroshino

          But we should be blaming Billie now, she is the new Danny!

        7. Dibullba

          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-vgZgLBIfbQ

  2. PureMajora

    Way to go Walky. Way to go.

    1. Jen Aside

      It’s her own fault if she didn’t notice he didn’t leave.

      [copping a peek]

      1. PureMajora

        UNFAIR GENDER BIAS. WHAT IF THIS WAS THE OTHER WAY AROUND? IT WOULD BE COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE. MISANDRY. MISANDRY! /intentional hyperbole and sarcasm/

        1. David

          Gender bias? Males cannot even point cross-eyedly.

        2. Opus the Poet

          Either you forgot to put in the sarcasm tag or you failed to notice the sarcasm tag in the previous comment…

        3. waldosan

          i don’t think that was sarcasm dude. a lot of the gender bias of this case has a lot to do with men’s apathy towards anyone seeing them naked. we just don’t care, or at the very most don’t care when a woman sees us. it takes being bashful and that’s not always considered being a manly trait.

          in other news; holy shit things are just a little bit different.

        4. AgentKeen

          I would probably freak the heck out if this happened to me.

          I am a prude.

  3. Plasma Mongoose

    THREESOMES!

    1. nothri

      Best laugh I’ve had all night. Thank you for that.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        You’re welcome! ^_^

        1. Kiggy

          Isn’t that another webcomic? *scratches head*

        2. CrazyOne

          but that comic rarely has them.

  4. Geminia999

    And walky continues to cement himself as a character I do not care for

    1. David Herbert

      How can you not like a dude who can appreciate his weenus?

      1. Geminia999

        Because everyone does it anyways? That’s like saying I must like I guy cause he breathes.

        1. TwistedTwo-Face

          If everyone does it anyways, how that be a reason to continue to not like him? LAWYER’D.

        2. Flare

          So you like no other guy? At all. Not even your self

        3. buckybone

          Everyone? Cis guys, maybe…but they’re not the only ones with that particular organ.

        4. Dante

          I haven’t seen you give any real reason to hate the guy though. I haven’t read any of the other comment threads all the way through, cause there’s just too many comments to really care. But still. And I’ve personally seen no reason to hate him, except for maybe how he is with Sal…

        5. gka

          Oh no! Someone might have an impression of a fictional character that isn’t supported by a forty page essay! Quick, demand justification, before their opinion seems like it might differ from yours and be valid at the same time!

        6. Shanunu

          Yay someone else said it.

        7. theskeuomorph

          This, pretty much.

    2. Soozi

      I kinda agree with you. I don’t mind him when he’s with Dorothy, but when by himself I’ve always found him kinda…. meh. Like, my only response to his comics are “Okay…. I don’t care”. I just don’t find him to be very engaging at all and I can’t bring myself to pay attention to him as a main character.

  5. rhelmot

    I was unaware his elbows were that flexible!

    1. Van Dyne

      his vocabulary, on the other hand….

    2. Smartkitty

      You beat me to it!

    3. Minirogue

      I’m upset that I had to scroll down this far to see a comment on his use of that particular word.

      1. hectoruno

        I tried to be the first to point out the elbow and not the winky is the weenus but I got to sleep.

  6. Variaman

    CLASSY.

  7. Kernanator

    …Ow?

    1. AdInfinitumSpero

      Not if it’s soft.

      1. Keldas

        It probably is; according to the porno he had 3 sessions.

        1. Bill

          If there were only two condoms but Walky had three sessions then they must truly be Amazi-Condoms!

        2. David Willis

          Walky exercised his boys three times, but only two of those times involved penetration.

        3. The_Master

          Do you guys really not know what a wenus is?

        4. David Willis

          Some time in the future, Walky will refer to his penis as a “ding-dong”; cue so many people saying “NO THAT’S THE SOUND A DOORBELL MAKES.”

        5. showler

          I know it’s a slang term, not a real word. So I also know I’m really sick of people making the elbow joke.

        6. PedanticJerkass

          I know what a wenus is, and I know it’s definitely not the same thing as a weenus.

  8. Uno

    CODE RED CODE RED ABORT Weenus pointing

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      EJECT! EJECT!

      1. asmcint

        NONONO, DON’T EJECT! SHITSHITSHIT, AWKWARD AND FURY-INDUCING SITUATION INBOUND!

        1. Gigafreak

          The order was EJECT, not EJACULATE. False alarm. Carry on.

  9. asdsadas

    Always follow the divining rod. Even when pointing at ceiling crack.

    1. Yotomoe

      What if he gets stuck. Noone wants to answer THAT house call.

      1. Just Cheeto Dust

        If he gets it stuck in the ceiling, maybe someone else has got themselves a gloryhole on the other side?

        (I don’t know which floor they’re on)

  10. Deathjavu

    I mean, that’s basically what penises are for. Pointing at everything possible.

    1. Cthulhu's Intern

      I believe you mean WEENUSES.

      1. Kennerly

        Weeni

        1. begbert2

          Wiigii

    2. The_Master

      Yea a weenus is the skin on your elbow. Most people have 2.

  11. NerdHerder

    DAT WEENUS

  12. Darth Cariss

    It seems unlikely she could enter the room without him knowing, but I guess he was busy talking out loud to himself really loudly and couldn’t hear her over it…

    Yeah, it seems a little weird. But all for the awkwardness of her seeing his weenus I guess.

    1. Yotomoe

      Sierra actually walked in while they were banging and just kinda sat at her desk and read. She enjoys the white noise.

      1. Foxhack

        But only one of them is white.

        1. Yotomoe

          As such she was the one who made the most noise.

        2. TheOthin

          Part white noise, part generically beige noise?

    2. bibulb

      I think it boils down to this :
      Walky is even less observant than I am. “Doh-de-doh-de-doh, pointin’ my weenus around, not really takin’ note of anything not weenus-related.”

      (True story : the Spouse and I go to Bed Bath and Beyond, and as we’re leaving, she hands me a large, brightly colored pillow in the shape of a trout. I express my surprise, wondering where she got it from. She points out that IT WAS UNDER HER GODDAMNED ARM THE ENTIRE TIME I WAS WITH HER.

      The amazing part of the story is that I wasn’t sleeping on the couch that night.)

      1. David

        I was afraid the punch line would have been that the trout was with tadpoles afterwards.

    3. Lilith

      Sierra is a ninja.

  13. fbihop

    I’m pointing at this comic right now.

  14. Bunk

    And then it pointed at Sierra

    1. Yotomoe

      Wouldn’t you?

      1. saltchocolate

        He might try, but you’d be in his way.

  15. AgentKeen

    In my head, he’s talking like Emeril.

    “Now, we kick the weenus up a notch. BAM!”

    1. Fuzzydaemon

      Rofl!!!!!

    2. Heavensrun

      Noooo, don’t kick the weenus! That’s mean!

      1. Just Cheeto Dust

        Unless that’s your fetish.

    3. Mo

      “Aw, yeah, babe. Make it happy.”

  16. John

    No biggie, Walky. Everyone and their parents already saw your weenus yesterday.

  17. Mr. Random

    Shhhhhh. The moment is over. Let us hold it a funeral.

  18. Count Dracula

    I’m glad Walky is in the strip. He’s one of the few characters that seems to be immune to drama, so we can get a break from getting our hearts broken. (yeah, he has his arc with Sal going but that’s been pushed to the side nicely)

    1. ocbrad1

      Yes! This was a very nice break from the sadness of the sinking ship of Ruth/Billie. I needed this lack of sadness. Only thing missing from this strip would be if Sierra delivered her lines while grinning.

    2. Sam

      Well, not completely immune, he broke up with Dorothy at one point in the comic after all and there is of course the Sal issue bubbling under the surface but he does tend to just fly under the drama radar otherwise.

      1. Clif

        When did Walky break up with Dorothy? He’s in her bed.

  19. Shadow12000

    Walky…a weenus is the name of the floppy skin on your elbow. Why are you pointing your elbows everywhere?

    1. nothri

      Yeah, that is kind of weird.

      ……

      ……

      ……

      HOLY CRAP HE MEANT HIS PENIS!

    2. Deathjavu

      Weenis, with an i.

      Weenus is still slang for penis, fortunately.

      (Because more penis slangs were needed)

      1. Dante

        You’re right though you’ve used the wrong word. More penis slangs ARE needed. And more vagina ones too. In fact, more slangs for all naughty parts!

        1. Deathjavu

          There are probably thousands of genital slangs, because after the first several hundred, literally anything you say in a suggestive tone accompanied with a pelvic thrust will qualify as a genital slang.

        2. Deathjavu

          Plus, y’know, different languages and all. Why, there’s probably millions or even billions of sensory inputs that humans would register as genitalia.

          The universe is a marvelous, schlong-and-beaver filled place.

          (also we’re obsessed with sex as a species and have very good imaginations)

    3. Jackson

      Nope, it’s not a “real” word. Or at least, not a word with any agreed-upon meaning in society as a whole or much use in the medical community.

  20. MM

    The first time was surprisingly not embarrassing. Note that Willis said nothing about the aftermath.

  21. Yotomoe

    And now my favorite character is back.

    1. someguywithakatana

      Sierra or Walky’s dick?

      1. Yotomoe

        Walky’s dick isn’t nearly as fun to look at.

  22. Glacirus

    Well…this was a pleasant and unexpected turn from the drama. Unless…Dorothy is gonna flip out on Walky for swinging his weenus around at her roommate! Oh noes! [/sarcasm] 😛

  23. PureMajora

    So…. who has tried pointing their weenuses at themselves after this comic?

  24. Dorsilus

    I just laughed at a DoA strip. This feels strangely foreign.

    1. MM

      Oh, is that what that strange sensation is called?

    2. Badeyes

      It’s only because Willis’s tear jars are full at the moment.

  25. Yotomoe

    Also Walky must have a gift to still have such boner control post coitus.

    1. RandomRedMage

      He pointed it at itself, I am guessing that means flacidity. :p last I checked, a rock hard weenus, or ‘boner’, was no longer flexible…

      1. Yotomoe

        Not unless you train it properly.

        1. Tenn

          Like Batman.

        2. arank11

          “I’m Batman and I can breathe in space.”

        3. Bemmie

          Through my weenis…. O.o?

  26. xain

    Finally we got our emergency lifeboats of comedy after that shipwreak

    1. Fuzzydaemon

      You mean our emergency skin boats?

  27. Fuzzydaemon

    When you are that young you can point the weenus anywhere because it is always up and stirring. He’ll lose this in about 5 years.

    I love Sierra.

  28. Estron

    Well, that de-escalated quickly.

  29. Idon'tcarenomore

    Yay for a laugh.

  30. AgentKeen

    … So how many people are trying to point their weenus at itself do you think there are because of this?

  31. Lokitsu

    A) This is Walky at his most awesome.
    B) What the hell is SJ and what does it have to do with Jeph Jacques and Willis destroying the internet/American freedom?

    I mean, I figured that they’d eventually destroy society. I just always assumed it would be with Butts.

    1. xain

      according to urban dictionary social justice.

    2. AgentKeen

      ‘Social Justice’ I would guess. I believe the rant was ‘how dare you encourage people to think misogyny is a bad thing!’

      1. xain

        treating women like human being? Next thing you know they’ll want the right to vote

        1. ninja_jesus

          End Women’s Sufferage! No woman should have to suffer! 😉

    3. Yotomoe

      Who said that B) thing?

      1. xain

        nameless mook on the dumblr

    4. Bill

      Where did this “SJ” reference turn up?

  32. Yotomoe

    http://i.imgur.com/hxmNdcx.png

    Doubt this’ll be tommorow’s comic but it SHOULD be.

    1. AgentKeen

      Well dang, now all I can think is that gender-bent Sierra would be just as frickin’ adorable as regular Sierra.

      1. Yotomoe

        http://i.imgur.com/b7QUBCW.png
        Genderbent Dorothy is probably grossed the hell out.

    2. saltchocolate

      <3

  33. SilverArrowArtemis

    I don’t know how long it’s been after coitus but is it not common sense to get dressed knowing that the room has two occupants? I mean, where else did you think Sierra was gonna go?

    1. Maveric1984

      I get dressed after post coitus cuddling, but that’s because I’m a skinny ass, and I get cold otherwise. Walky, however, is still riding high on endorphins by the sound of it, and so was playing around. I imagine Dorothy (who is at her desk under him after all) is rolling her eyes, but smiling just the same. At least until her roomie spoke up.

  34. Kell

    I thought weenus was the term for the loose skin around your elbow…? haha

  35. NF

    Walky is a numbskull.

    1. Dude

      .. who effortlessly gets straight As and is set-up with a lovely, intelligent lady. Sorry your message got cut off, but I finished it for you.

  36. caesaria82

    Ahhh, levity. Bless.

  37. newllend

    Like what you see Sierra, sorry but its reserved for one.

  38. Aizat

    Getting caught by your girlfriend’s room mate? Weenus pointed!

  39. Valmore

    Girlfriend’s roommate back in the room? EEEEEEEEEEEP… weenus pointed. That eep was cyborg noise, babe. CYBORG WEENUS POINTING.

  40. Pyr05

    I love how Sierra doesn’t even care that he’s ‘weenus pointing’ left right and center. Literally.

    1. Yotomoe

      Sierra has seen many a Weenus in her day. Walky’s is nothing special.

      1. Ancestral Hamster

        That reminds me of a line from a sci-fi short story where a man who was literally being a dick got totally humiliated in public by a girl he was trying to freak out by waving his “weenus” at her. “It looks like a man’s penis. Only smaller.”

        1. bibulb

          I remember it in a Callahan’s story. (I am embarrassed that I can’t remember which one it’s in.)

        2. Ancestral Hamster

          Don’t be embarrassed. That’s better than what I remembered. It probably was a Callahan’s story as it took place in a bar.

        3. vlademir1

          Yeah it was one of Spider Robinson’s but I think it was one of the Lady Callahan books rather than any of the ones centered on Jake Stonebender.

        4. bibulb

          It’s a Long-Drink story, so it’s being narrated by Jake, but I thought that it’s part of The Callahan Touch, and it isn’t – it’s part of the same cycle of anecdotes that is the “egg on my own face” stories with Tommy’s “Crosstown Buses” story.
          (And after a little research, it’s in “Fivesight”, when they’re trying to poke at Jake himself.)

          (full disclosure : I’m an INSANELY huge Callahan’s fan, and identify WAY too much with Jake in certain circumstances. Apologies.)

        5. DSL

          I think I saw that joke in “Isaac Asimov”s Treasury of Humor” (yes, he really did write about everything). 1960s, I think.
          “… and THIS, my dear, is a phallus!”
          “Oh, I get it! It’s like a prick, but smaller!”

        6. Ancestral Hamster

          “Fivesight”, yes! Thanks for tracking it down.

        7. Jonathan S.

          There is absolutely no need to apologize for being a huge Callahan’s fan (said the guy who not only spotted someone playing Jake Stonebender in Champions Online, but also corrected his costume – he wasn’t carrying Lady MacBeth).

        8. Estron

          Yay for fans of Spider Robinson and the Callahan’s crew!

        9. Estron

          I am of a size and age to play Doc Webster myself, but I am still alive and not Spoonerizing yet (knocks wood).

        10. Bill

          I once had a girlfriend who turned me on to Spider Robinson and Callahan’s Crosstime Saloon.  We broke up soon after so I never got the opportunity to properly thank her.

  41. Alex Stritar

    Possible squeal in the works? (obviously not)

  42. Maycroft

    abort weenus pointing, abort weenus pointing!!

  43. Otera

    Sierra should be glad they kicked her out in the first place. one morning during my freshman year I woke up to my roommate and her boyfriend going at it. Seriously? what the hell? that was one awkward year.

    1. Yotomoe

      They did it for a whole year? They’ve got some STAMINA.

      1. Just Cheeto Dust

        Or a lot of Adderall.

    2. LWS

      Did you one better. I switched dorms between fall and spring semesters my sophomore year. Went to move into my new room, my very first contact with my new roommate was walking in on him and his girlfriend butt naked. Can you say awkward? Definitely resulted in some weenus shrinkage for him…

  44. pendrake

    I think the punchline would have been funnier if…

    [Sarah]: You know, I’m back in the room…

    [Walky]: *stupid grin* Don’t care!

    ;P

    1. Just Cheeto Dust

      I think The IT Crowd had the best take on that carefree attitude.

    2. ArkArks

      Or this:
      …
      [Walky]: Aaand weenus pointed at roommate. BAM! Task complete.

      He did say his weenus is being pointed everywhere in the room. 🙂

      1. John

        Alt text beat you to it.

    3. timemonkey

      Sierra not Sarah

      1. Tenn

        And now I imagine Sierra going Samuel L Jackson on Pendrake.

        1. Jonathan S.

          Pendrake’s as crazy as those people on Twitter!

      2. pendrake

        D’oh, you are correct. Damn my tired eyes…

    4. Bill

      Even funnier —
      [Sierra]: You know, I’m back in the room…
      [Walky]: *stupid grin* Don’t care!
      [Sierra]: *MY* turn.

      1. John

        [Walky]: Wiigii! All the hot ladies want my weenus!
        *Sierra pulls Walky’s hoodie off Dorothy and tosses it at Walky.
        [Sierra]: Put Joe’s sock back on the doorknob on your way out, okay?

  45. Originalslugboy

    I don’t think I’ve ever laughed out loud at a webcomic before!

  46. Jackson

    General PSA: Neither “weenus” nor any homophone of it is an actual medical term or a term with an agreed-upon meaning. It has been colloquially used to refer to the area between the thumb and forefinger on the hand and to the loose skin over the elbow, and probably other things, but all of those meanings were just assigned to a funny made-up word that sounded like “penis”.

    But it is funny.

    Weenus.

    1. nothri

      Yeah, Willis. I’m sure you didn’t mean anything by it, by you should really try to be less homophonic in the future.

    2. Kelly

      No one ever said it was medical terminology.

      As far as a general term, while I am sure it has been used for other things on occasion, every time I have heard it (not that many times), either IRL or in media, it has been used to mean penis.

      1. Jackson

        You should maybe read the rest of the comments.

  47. CianM1301

    And now, a look on the lighter side. Walky got laid!

  48. Coco

    Walky. ♥

  49. hof1991

    Butt naked in your girlfriend’s bed is much better if she is there too. Hanging out there alone – not so much. Though we aren’t sure Dorothy is wearing anything but Walky’s jacket at this point. Sierra should have given them a little more time to get presentable.

  50. LordHaw

    Oh my! That made me laugh out loud this morning!. Great way to start the day!

  51. Arturo

    Fact: Every man has at some point lain in the bath tub and pretended his weenus was a submarine.

    1. Absolom

      Fact: this is true of men who existed before bathtubs, and with bathtubs before submarines.

      Fact: why do you think humans invented submarines? Or bathtubs?

  52. Jesse

    I don’t understand the mechanics suggested by that fourth panel.

    1. Kennerly

      Walky is exceptionally endowed.

  53. Davethedavedave

    He’s not announcing it in a Taco Bell with a slow smile for effect. 🙁

  54. Mr. Bawkbagawk

    I call mine Tip, cuz it is 15% of the total.

    20% if the service is exceptional.

  55. Tenn

    In the 3rd panel, Walky’s facial expression and philosophical observation makes me think of Calvin.

    And now I’m silently thankful that “Calvin & Hobbes: the College Years” is not a thing that exists.

    1. The Candyman

      Unless Calvin grew up to become Mike.

      1. Drakey

        But we’ve seen Mike’s parents, and I’m pretty sure he’s not adopted.

        On the other hand, if he had been adopted after, say, his parents died horribly, I could see him coming from a place of deep bitterness, and choosing to leave behind the name and the life he once had…

  56. B

    Anyone who refers to their genitalia as “weenus” deserves to be walked in on.

    1. Tenn

      Depending on who’s doing the walking in, that might actually be desirable.

      …

      “Weenus.”

      …

      …

      …

      …Damn.

      1. John

        What, did you get Buckets of Blood Guy?

  57. Stephen

    Fun fact: Your weenus is actually the flap of skin on your elbow

    1. Keroshino

      Yet Willis uses it because, lol it sounds like penis!

      1. Gold

        He’s still living in the nineties.

    2. Bill

      The difference is the spelling.  The flap of skin on the elbow is generally spelled with an “i” (weenis); Walky’s name for his John Thomas there is spelled with a “u”.  Which of course is totes illogical, since “penis” is also spelled with an “i”.

      It’s time to come up with a different word for the elbow flap so that “weenus”, regardless of spelling, can hereafter and evermore refer to the tallywhacker.

    3. Kelly

      Fun fact, English is a descriptive language, not prescriptive. Words mean what people use them to mean. In this case it probably has a dual meaning, though I personally have never encountered it in use with a meaning other than penis.

      1. Killianti

        While it’s true that words mean what their speakers intend, they also mean what their audience perceives. It’s not unheard of for two people talking to eachother to have two different conversations because they understand the words differently.

  58. The Candyman

    To be fair, Sierra could have knocked.

    1. LaShawn

      To be fair, Sierra could’ve also said “Uh, this is my room too.”

  59. Emoroffle

    Weenis points at Sierra. BAM!

  60. Yet-One-More-Idiot

    O Walky, u so crazy! But yeah, I could totally see him doing that after he finished making a sex, all man-like. ;P

  61. nerdyjuan

    Dear willis
    1) not to be selfcentered but walky and me are super similar from what i have read of him this is awesome but swear if i find out your timetravelling me and u didnt write down tomorrow winning lotto i’ll be mad
    2)keep up the good work

  62. Ahaha

    Literally the funniest subtext

  63. man in black

    Busted in your man moment

  64. Opus the Poet

    You left “Walky’s weenus” out of the tags.

    1. Opus the Poet

      It could be a separate character like Shatner’s Hair http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YTjKeHXe2c

  65. Coco

    I wonder if Walky realizes that Weenus is the actual name of one’s elbow flesh.

    1. Clif

      Are you confusing weenus and weenis?

  66. Bill

    We were so concerned about “weenis” vs “weenus” that no one ever questioned the phrase “butt naked”.  Isn’t the term supposed to be “buck naked”?

  67. hof1991

    And Sierra is tall. If she were Dorothy sized, this would be less awkward.

  68. arank11

    This is kind of off-topic, but I must ask: when is Daisy going to get a girlfriend? Everyone else seems to have someone. Even Joyce has a boyfriend! Granted, he’s gay, but still.

    1. Opus the Poet

      Which one is Daisy again? The only Daisy I’m familiar with is in a different web comic (BSCB).

      1. Opus the Poet

        Oh, never mind… http://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-1/05-media-rumble/news-2/

      2. John

        Daisy is the newspaper editor. I’m not sure, but I think she might be a lesbian.

  69. Karma Aster

    The important thing, Walky, is that YOU feel you’ve accomplished something.

  70. diello

    I had to look up the spelling of ‘wenis’ to make sure you werent talkin’ about the same thing 😉

  71. Mada

    Rereading this comic (again)

    Y’know, I’m starting to hear all of Walky’s lines in Beast Boy’s voice.

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