268

Whoa
Posted on October 27, 2017 by David M Willis

268 thoughts on “Whoa”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    That’s a risky thing to say around joe =o

    [yeah, I get he’s trying to improve… BUT JOE]

    1. Ana Chronistic

      and MELLO YELLO

      1. Doctor_Who

        Not Mountain Dew? No wonder she’s so glum.

        1. Pablo360

          It’s probably out of service today. It saw what she did and is punishing her for it.

          (is the twisted logic she’s coming up with in her mind even though she knows it’s unreasonable because brains are assholes)

      2. Jay Eff

        Wait, how do you know that’s not Mountain Dew?

        *Looks at glass*

        …yeah, that’s Mello Yello

        1. Stephen Bierce

          Could be half-Mello Yello and half-green Gatorade. Masochist’s beverage if ever there was one.

        2. Pablo360

          No, the masochist’s beverage is a 1:1:2 mixture of Sprite, Mug, and Cherry Pepsi. I should know, I drink it all the time.

        3. Doctor_Who

          No, it’s root beer and orange soda.

          I know because I used to work at McDonalds, and when I came in I’d make myself a cup of that to wake up. It was exactly the right kind of awful to make you forget all about sleep.

        4. Pablo360

          I’ve got to try that.

        5. Doctor_Who

          Don’t use too much root beer, the flavor dominates and it will just taste like you made orangeish root beer from a Coke Remix machine, which isn’t 100% awful.

          Try for something that’s between 2/3 and 3/4 orange soda, then the root beer with just completely ruin everything and it’ll be perfect.

        6. Needfuldoer

          Can you substitute Moxie for the root beer if you really hate yourself?

        7. ValdVin

          Moxie?

          Amber would have to go down a couple levels for that.

        8. Mydnyt

          I like Barq’s and Orange soda

        9. Tacos

          Clearly it’s radioactive waste >.>

        10. Needfuldoer

          Mello Yello Zero is better than Diet Mountain Dew, even if it’s nearly impossible to find by comparison.

      3. C.

        IU is a Coca-Cola campus, so Mello Yello it is.

        1. Delicious Taffy

          Dina got Mtn Dew with her cereal, earlyish on.

      4. motorfirebox

        THERE’S NOTHING MELLO ABOUT IT

    2. Thor

      “‘Do whatever’? Here? In the cafeteria? But there’s only so much ‘whatever’ I can get away with in the cafeteria…at this particular table…again.”

  2. AnvilPro

    I like that no one is letting Amber angst, and they keep trying to make friends with her

  3. Delicious Taffy

    Holy shit, these two…

    1. WarDragon

      Yep. I’m suddenly worried they might create a critical mass of self-loathing, and suck the entire campus into a angst-singularity.

      1. Wright

        Or they might actually bond. Two characters with absolutely terrible fathers, who were scarred badly by them, and scared that they’re becoming more like them.

        1. Reltzik

          Also, scared they might become step-siblings.

        2. RacingTurtle

          Yeah, they do have that in common.

        3. WarDragon

          True, but a bond based on that wouldn’t necessarily be healthy. “We’re both so fucked up we don’t deserve to be around other people” could create a horrible feedback loop.

          Hopefully Joyce and Danny, who both see good things in each of them, will be able to drag them out of any such funk.

        4. Unusually Angry Hippie

          Also, we already saw that relationship. Ruth and Billy. Didn’t work out that great for anyone.

      2. 0kami

        Oh my god…

        HA2 was right!

    2. Delicious Taffy

      Wait, my comment went through? It’s been failing for days.

      1. Delicious Taffy

        Is it my Wi-Fi? I’m currently out shopping, so different signal. I’m frustrated and confused. I type something and it gets eaten.

        1. Reltzik

          Thank you, btw. Your posts were delicious and moderately fattening.

        2. King Daniel

          If I mail-ecture you on the subject, I find post-eating to not be a good habit.

        3. Geneseepaws

          If the comment is full of burn, is that a pre-toasty? Or Post Toasty?

        4. Needfuldoer

          Power cycle your router and modem. While they’re booting, have your device forget your home WiFi. Once they’re back up and running, re-join your network.

    3. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet

      What are you talking about? They have great chemistry. Just like fluorine and hydrogen.

      1. hof1991

        great chemistry should lead to explosions

        1. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet

          Well, instantly transforming into a colorless gas that burns your flesh and melts your lungs and corneas is in close second.

  4. CleverTrousers

    Was shoddy mac and cheese the straw that broke the camel’s back?

    1. Pablo360

      All mac & cheese is beautiful Clever

      1. Goshii

        I beg to differ pablo https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/12suQQrVctVAUFWLWWnJc1hs8b0=/0x227:2000×1274/fit-in/1200×630/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/9497267/mac_and_Cheese1.jpg

        1. Pablo360

          …don’t rate mac & cheeses Goshii

  5. ValdVin

    And we pick the thread up here. What did Danny relate to Joe off-panel? Anything?

    1. Marsh Maryrose

      I’m kinda doing the slow internet equivalent of a spit-take here.

      Joe and Danny stayed up all night playing a video game. Danny literally crashed into Ethan’s lap. Joe…is still Joe-ing around, like it was any other morning. DOES JOE NOT NEED SLEEP? Or is he just used to not getting it?

      1. Screwball

        Well, without his lady-loving ways at work, it’s quite possible that he’s got a lot more energy to spare than usual…

      2. ValdVin

        Joe’s manstubble looks a bit more manstubbly than last time, to me. That may be a convention to demonstrate he’s tired, overextended, hasn’t shaved / showered.

        Now I want to know who’s lap he’s gonna crash on. Neither Jacob nor Ethan are available, right?

  6. 4,000 spiders

    what’s in amber’s glass, what liquid is that color, is it mountain dew, i didn’t think mountain dew was actually green i’ve never seen it outside the bottle, please help me

    1. Pablo360

      It might be some kind of juice, some college cafeteria have Obscure Juice Machines™

      Or maybe it’s Mello Yello

      1. 4,000 spiders

        i’m assuming mello yello because is juice usually that color?? WHY AM I VERY INEXPERIENCED WHEN IT COMES TO EVERYDAY BEVERAGES

        1. Pablo360

          Well, certain juice cocktails (esp. if they contain grape) may be that color, but yeah it’s definitely Mello Yello

        2. Marsh Maryrose

          I don’t know about you, but I am inexperienced with everyday beverages because my mother (quite wisely, in my estimation) just didn’t make sugary carbonated beverages a part of my life growing up. She didn’t make a big deal about it, she didn’t make them taboo, they just weren’t there as an option for the most part. (Did I mention she was really smart?)

          To this day, my co-workers can’t really quite believe that I don’t want soft drinks at lunch even when they are free.

        3. Lawzlo

          I’m assuming that she’s relaxing with a nice glass of Ecto Cooler.

        4. Roborat

          Yea, it is probably Mello Yello, or some cheaper (is that possible) knockoff the school buys. But as at least one other mentioned, it could be nuclear waste.

      2. tim gueguen

        Could be some sort of energy/sports drink. I wouldn’t be surprised if Amber drinks them because of her martial arts practice.

        1. Delicious Taffy

          Green Powerade is excellent, so maybe.

    2. Jay Eff

      Mountain Dew is piss-colored.

      That’s Mello Yellow.

      1. Delicious Taffy

        Is…is your piss green?

        1. Jay Eff

          Not mine, no.

        2. thejeff

          Obligatory reference

    3. Queen Anthai

      Mountain Dew in a clear glass is EXACTLY that color.

      1. 4,000 spiders

        that’s horrifying i’m never drinking mountain dew wtf

        1. Needfuldoer

          There’s a reason it comes in green bottles!

      2. Pablo360

        No, Mountain Dew is greenish yellow, this is more of a yellowish green

        1. Pablo360

          Honestly it looks like cucumber puree

        2. StClair

          “chartreuse”

        3. Pablo360

          Get those fake colors out of here, I only recognize burgundy, heliotrope, and thallium

        4. Marsh Maryrose

          Those too are fake colors. The only real colors are cyan, magenta, yellow, and black. Alternatively, red, green, and blue. More alternatively, the set of values #000000..#FFFFFF

          Unless, of course, you are a mantis shrimp. Then all bets are off.

        5. Delicious Taffy

          I love #00FF00. It’s my favorite.

        6. Loki

          Fun fact: #face8D gives you a kinda acceptable skin color for Caucasian people.

          I’m serious, try it.

        7. Marsh Maryrose

          As closely as I can tell, #face8D is an exact match for Mike in the cast page.

          In a perfect world, it would have matched Billie.

        8. StClair

          and #faaace is a lovely light/pale pink.

        9. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet

          Your monitor must be set really differently from mine, because from here #face8D would only be an acceptable skin color for a cartoon version of Donald Trump. Or an even more cartoon version of Donald Trump as the case may be.

          Or possibly for human flesh-flavored Jelly Bellies®.

        10. ValdVin

          Okay, thanks to you lot, I’m gonna spend two hours messing around with a hex-based color picker, because I’m fascinated by the skintones here. (Especially the redheads’ skin, being one myself.)

          Eh, who am I kidding? As someone who has printed out Pantone charts to ascertain different blue shades used in sportsball, this was an inevitability.

    4. Shiro

      The only liquid I know that’s that color is Mr Clean.

      1. tim gueguen

        Don’t give Amber ideas!

    5. 4,000 spiders

      wait wait i vaguely remember there being a strip where dina drank mountain dew in a glass and i’m vaguely tempted to go back and try to find it

      1. ValdVin

        Right here. http://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-5/02-threes-a-crowd/breakfastofchampions/

        I don’t want to get into the great debate, but it seems more pale than whatever’s in Amber’s glass today.

  7. Pablo360

    This will either be very important for both people involved, or absolutely terrible for every single person in the cast, depending on how seriously Joe is taking his character development.

    I know it’s foolish, but I’m optimistic. I mean, Willis isn’t cruel enough to put Amber under even more distress right now.

    Right?

  8. Keulen

    “How dare you try to be nice to me.”

    1. Pablo360

      “If you’re nice to me, then that means I’m capable of being liked, and worthy of kindness, which means the only reason I hate myself is because I’m an asshole who’s unworthy of kindness.”

      1. Bagge

        Ouch. Spot on.

      2. StClair

        Depression Brain, you’re the worst.

  9. Nono

    Plot twist; Joe remembers Amber is that chick in Computer Science that is a friend of Danny’s and is seeing if she hacked the To Do list.

    1. Pablo360

      Based on his facial expressions, I doubt he remembers that… yet.

    2. Marsh Maryrose

      Assuming he can remember a month back — a huge assumption when it comes to Joe and women not at the top of his do list — he remembers Amber as Danny’s “little Dorothy clone.”

  10. Stephen Bierce

    *plays the Run-DMC version of “Walk This Way” on the hacked Muzak*

  11. TemporalShrew

    I’m surprised Joe can even hear her through the wall of unmitigated angst.

    1. Pablo360

      “You merely adopted the angst. I was born into it. Molded by it.”

      The beauty of this webcomic is you have no idea who I imagined saying that line

      1. MM

        It’s possible to hear that line in a voice that isn’t Batman’s?

        1. Tacos

          It is indeed possible. Bane’s <.<

        2. 3oranges

          I couldn’t hear Bane say anything.

        3. Pablo360

          Touchè. Far too chè.

        4. Deanatay

          I heard it in Von Pinn’s voice, from Girl Genius:

          “I live with pain. I use it. Cultivate it. SHAPE it.”

        5. Pablo360

          But whose voice do you hear Von Pinn’s lines in?

    2. Reltzik

      Angst is a selective filter. It lets the awful in with perfect acuity.

    3. Roborat

      Amber: You’re not quite angsty enough. You’re semi-angsty. You’re quasi-angsty. You’re the margarine of angst. You’re the Diet Coke of angst, just one calorie, not angsty enough.

      1. Goshii

        Better than being the Coke Zero of angst, zero calories and zero taste

  12. Passchendaele

    I really don’t think Joe talks much to his dad in the first place. Just a hunch, if you will.

  13. Stu

    Pretty sure she pushed herself to that threshold by being so confrontational right off the bat, coupled with her dismissive tone when hearing that Joe was just trying to make friends.

    Also, good on Joe for taking Joyce’s criticism to heart.

  14. Shiro

    Joe, I don’t care how exhausted you look in panel 4, it is going to be a while before anyone female feels okay sitting next to you.

    That said, given panel 3, I am going to guess your day’s only getting more tiring from here.

    1. Fart Captor

      It looks like he’s finally learning, though. Starting with “hello” like a normal damn person, giving her a chance to respond at her own pace, and I think waiting to see if he’s unwelcome.

      Only a few days ago, Joe might’ve simply sat down without giving Amber a chance to object, and opening the conversation with some inappropriate joke

      1. Shiro

        This is true.

  15. MapleAmber

    Aw…
    I feel bad for Joe, but I also don’t, but that statement… awww.

  16. tirachokko

    I suddenly recalled that one strip where it’s revealed jacob slept with her mom in the walkyverse what is wrong with me o_o

    1. tirachokko

      augh and my gravatar looks kind of self satisfied about it too

      1. Geneseepaws

        Self-satisfied won’t make you go blind, smug, smug will make you go blind, right?

    2. Pablo360

      Damn you tirachokko

  17. mister gray

    Joe, the quest for friendship continues!

  18. Roger Sterling

    …so…what the hell does Joe do now*?

    *Suicide provisionally off the table pending two referendums and a “greek hemlock” fad.

    1. Shiro

      Accept that changing his image is going to take a long process, donuts be damned. Own his past behavior, and resolve to do better. Resist the urge to get defensive when girls are understandably standoffish or wary around him. Otherwise, act like a decent person, and keep listening and learning. He’ll get there in the end, if he keeps trying.

      1. Roger Sterling

        No I mean like what does he *do*. I know what his character development entails. I’m saying what would you tell Joe to do with himself on a day-to-day, given that ‘crawl into a dark place and wifi go-kart with strangers’ isn’t a viable option for him.

        1. Shiro

          Well, live. Go to class. Hang out with Danny and Jacob and Dorothy and Joyce and any other friends he’s made offscreen. Talk to Roz, get her take on all this because sexism is one thing very much in her wheelhouse, and she’d be a useful sounding board right now. Basically everything he was doing before minus the sexual harassment.

        2. geno

          Let’s just say Willis probably;y already foreshadowed what Joe does next. He’s being pulled in a new direction.

    2. Reltzik

      Ask Leslie for advice.

      1. Reltzik

        …. roulette-assigned avatar is completely accidental to this post.

      2. RacingTurtle

        I really want to see this happen.

    3. Reltzik

      Or, maybe make a blog post like this.

      (Content warning: Confessions of some scummy PUA acts by someone who is both repentant and trying to make things better.)

      1. Shiro

        I don’t currently have the mental fortitude to read that (apologies), but the trend of dudes self-flagellating over all the sexual harassment and assault they’ve committed…leaves a really bad taste in my mouth. Idk. I want to articulate that further but words aren’t really working for me right now.

        1. Reltzik

          That’s perfectly fine and nothing to apologize for. I posted the content warning just so that someone who didn’t want to read that, wouldn’t.

      2. Gaia

        I read trough that link and I have to ask, is this common in (I’m assuming the USA) ?

        1. Tarmaniel

          I’m pretty sure this happens everywhere. I have some bad news, the world has a lot of people in it that don’t give a shit about your feelings and are perfectly OK with lying to you and using you to get what they want. PUAs are basically the sleazy used car salesman of the dating world, and they exist because, well, you can make a damn good living as a sleazy used car salesman.

        2. thejeff

          The explicit PUA thing is fairly new, as in (mostly) online groups teaching these tactics and openly encouraging each other to go harass women – like the “pickup bootcamp” he mentions. The basic behaviors are widespread and not at all new.
          I’d be surprised if something similar didn’t exist pretty much world wide.

          One thing that struck me was his comment about his pre-PUA live: “Of course, there was an earlier time when I knew it was wrong to assault women: when I was a conservative Christian, and I believed all sexual touching outside of marriage was a sin. Because all sexual contact was a sin, no one ever bothered to talk to me about the distinction between consensual and nonconsensual touching.”
          That plays nicely into a number of themes in this comic. In that kind of culture, “consent” isn’t a relevant concept – other than consent to marry.

      3. Tarmaniel

        The fact that he was unaware of what he was doing actually surprises me. I know a couple hardcore PUAs and in my experience they’re 100% aware that it’s sleazy behavior, they just don’t care.

  19. Cerberus

    Amber’s self-esteem is great. Super great. No worries at all.

    1. Pablo360

      And there’s no way that this will make it worse.

    2. Heather Jean

      She’s obviously filled with self-loathing. And carbs. Lots and lots of carbs.

      1. Pablo360

        All of the carbs. All of them.

    3. Reltzik

      It’s so great, there’s no way that anyone could possibly raise it higher than it already is!

    4. Delicious Taffy

      Hey, compared to some of us…

    5. Nobody

      Hey self loathing is fine, I hate myself and… hm yeah we should be concerned

    6. Andy

      The greatest self-esteem. I can assure you, there’s no problem.

  20. Roger Sterling

    Wait a second, why has he been exclusively trying to socialize with females? Was Danny his only male friend?

    Does Joe harbor a self-loathing so complete it extends to everyone he associates with ‘his own kind’?

    1. Nono

      Jacob and to some extent, Walky.

      1. Roger Sterling

        His friendship with Jacob is a) an aspect of their being roomies and b) consists of guarded respect and little else.

        He shares about as much with Walky as you would skin cells with a fly after smashing it.

        1. Fart Captor

          Jacob is Ethan’s roommate, not Joe’s. We’ve seen that the two of them hang out, voluntarily. The two of them seem to be friendly at the very least.

        2. ValdVin

          Yep. Jacob was even granted the honorific of “new main man” by Joe at one point. And going to Galasso’s for lunch, more than “the cafeteria’s in the middle of everything”.

          (But when it hit the fan Joe went running back to Danny. What a good egg.)

      2. ValdVin

        Why do I have the feeling Walky is just off panel preparing a song for just this occasion?

    2. Tacos

      Well given how he pissed off practically every female, Joe exclusively trying to socialize with them to try and get back on their good side is to be expected.

      1. thejeff

        Which is just another sign of Joe’s issues. Even though he’s trying, he’s still trying by pushing himself at women, just in a “help me redeem myself” way rather than a “have sex with me” way. Less aggressively here than with Sarah in his last appearance, but still doing it.
        “I’ve changed. I need women to affirm that.”

        Like Shiro said up thread, he really needs to back off and go about the parts of his life that don’t revolve around making women talk to him. Give them time to see that he’s not going to make a pass every time he comes into view.

        1. Gwen

          Yes and no. Yes because it’s still putting a lot of the burden on women, but no because one of the lessons he is trying to learn is how to interact with women in some other way than as sex objects. Do women *owe* it to him to help him further his personal growth? Absolutely not. Is he out of bounds for trying to practice relating to women as human beings? No. Is he going to mess up? Given that his platonic relationship skills, even with other men, aren’t great, almost certainly.

    3. Tarmaniel

      There aren’t a whole lot of male characters in the cast to begin with.

      1. Shiro

        I mathed it out once and iirc if you count less-seen characters, it’s right about even. It’s just that the girls are more interesting and tend to get more screen time–probably because Joyce is the perspective character and we see them around her wing.

    4. Pablo360

      I don’t think Joe knows how to friend. He had Danny, and he never needed anyone else — or at least toxic masculinity made him think he never needed anyone else.

  21. JessWitt

    It’s good of Joe to make the effort to interact with his future stepsister.

    Yeah, yeah those aren’t his intentions, but I betcha you’re thinking of them as related now.

    1. ValdVin

      Okay, I forgot Stacy + Richard. (Really, how did I?)

      Like this setup couldn’t lead to anything more awkward tomorrow.

  22. Architex

    My self-esteem is not low enough to date you,
    It’s close, but not quite there

    1. davidbreslin101

      Dammit, I know that line from somewhere. (I’m trying to remember if it’s real life.)

      1. Annamal

        Garfunkel and Oates
        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9gF5-C0y6N4

  23. Pablo360

    Wait, Mac n Cheese, fries, and a cupcake? Those are all the same food group! Amber, just because you’re depressed doesn’t mean potatoes are suddenly actually vegetables. And if you’re in such a funk that taste has stopped mattering to you, there’s no reason not to get juice.

    Also, mac & cheese and fries sounds like a vaguely unappealing combo but maybe that’s just me.

    1. Pablo360

      No, Mac n Cheese doesn’t count as dairy. Any mac n cheese cheesy enough to do so isn’t mac n cheese, it’s macaroni soup. Or Panera Bread.

      1. Shiro

        Occasionally, I decide “I’m gonna make EXTRA GOOD mac n cheese” and dump like three cups of whatever shredded cheese I have on hand into it, forgetting how it ended every other time. It’s super good but rich enough to make me feel sick.

        1. Pablo360

          You wanna know the secret to good mac & cheese? Pimento. I have no idea what it is, but it makes for good mac & cheese.

        2. Shiro

          I’m a bad southerner, I regard pimento cheese with extreme suspicion. Pimentos are those things in olives, right, and olives are terrible.

        3. Pablo360

          In that case how about a nice jalapeño mac?

        4. Shiro

          Yesssss, that I am all over

          brb, mac n cheesening

    2. Heather Jean

      Maybe her mom was right when she blamed all of Amber’s problems on blood sugar.

    3. Fart Captor

      I think her selection would indicate that taste has not stopped mattering to her. Nutrition may have, but I’m fairly certain those are all foods she enjoys, even if those particular foods together are a somewhat strange combination.

      1. thejeff

        comfort foods.

        Sometimes you’re just like “I want this and I want this and I want this”, without even considering how they go together.

    4. CJ

      Mac and cheese is not a thing in Germany, so to me it looked like scrambled eggs. Though, for breakfast, I wouldn’t have fries with them. Or, more like, never fries with scrambled eggs, now that I think about it.

      1. CJ

        Wait, it’s already midday. Joe has some of that yellow stuff with a burger.

      2. missilentmurmur

        In Paris, they served omelette with fried potato cubes as Sunday brunch at the cafeteria, so that makes perfect sense to me. (Not)

        1. Pablo360

          Potato cubes (aka American fries) are a breakfast food. French fries are a lunch food. I don’t knkw why this distinction exists but it does.

        2. Roborat

          Potato cubes? Are you talking about hash browns?

        3. Pablo360

          No, hashbrowns are potato slivers. (I mean, sometimes they’re tiny cubes, but I’m talking about the bigger ones.) Although those are also breakfast food…

        4. Roborat

          Ah, you are talking about the larger cubes, not the small ones. I have never heard those called fries, American or otherwise.

        5. thejeff

          “Home fries” is a pretty common Americanism for them. I’d never heard “American fries” either, but I’m not surprised it would be used elsewhere in the world.

        6. Pablo360

          Actually it’s used in Michigan.

        7. davidbreslin101

          Meanwhile, I live in a place where serving lasagne with chips is standard. Because lasagne on its own just isn’t filling enough for the Yorkshire stomach.

  24. Inahc

    huh. well.

    at least it’s not joyce? that would have probably gone like https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9Me9OleiRE [Frozen – For the First Time in Forever (Reprise)]

  25. Sofiya

    Aw, I feel bad for Joe. I know he f’d up but I forgive easy and he’s trying.

    1. Reltzik

      I think even the people who don’t forgive easy would say that he’s trying.

      1. thejeff

        Oh, he’s definitely trying.

  26. Jenny Islander

    Good grief, Amber, stop hitting yourself!

    1. StClair

      “Hitting people’s all I’m good for.”

      (should I be worried how easy it was to access that?)

      1. Gwen

        Depends whether that’s an active imagination and capacity for empathy, or personal experience.

        1. StClair

          Yes.

      2. Deanatay

        Not true she’s great with a knife i’ll shut up now

  27. Pope William T Wodium

    I can so intimately relate to that instant regret.

  28. Wright

    This might be getting a little meta, and probably a bit too personal, but it just struck me how odd it is that there are literally no positive father figures shown in the Dumbing of Age universe. The best we’ve possibly seen is Joyce’s dad, who just *used* to be horrible and is possibly learning. Oh, and we’ve heard of Carla’s awesome parents, but they’really off-screen.
    It’s a little odd, considering that Willis is a father of two.

    I used to think that a theme of “Dumbing of Age” was ‘dads are horrible’, but now I don’t think so. I don’t know Willis at all, but I doubt anyone could write with the theme “dads are horrible” while being a father himself.

    I think it’s more like, “Being a bad parent is easy. Being a good parent is really hard. But even if you had a bad parent, you don’t need to be defined by that bad parent. You can change and be better by yourself.”

    1. Pablo360

      You’re right, there are no positive father figures. Hank does not exist, nor do Sierra and Dorothy’s fathers. Funny how that works.

      1. King Daniel

        Dina, too, seemingly resulted from a virgin birth.

        1. StClair

          and the Ruttens, who did not create and give their daughter her very own Transformer (toy).

      2. Marsh Maryrose

        Nor Dina’s father. Nor Faye’s, although we don’t know anything about him in this universe.

        In my first two months as a college freshman, I met exactly zero parents that I recall. (My first-year roommate and I both moved in sans far-away parents.) One of my friends took me home with him for Thanksgiving when he found out I didn’t have any place to go to (my parents were overseas), and I met his parents then.

        DoA is set on a college campus. The only parents you’re going to see (or even know about) are those who are there to further some narrative arc. Sometimes their role in that narrative is positive, sometimes negative, but it’s not necessarily about good or bad parenting per se — although that certainly comes up.

        But when parents do show up in DoA, they’re not there to give authorial homilies on parenting. They’re there for the story.

      3. Jago

        So the dude was wrong, you don’t have to be a dick about it.

        1. 3oranges

          It may be a mistake, but somehow it’s a particular mistake you hear again and again, like how all the Christians here are portrayed as awful. That tends to make the responses a bit edgier.

    2. Fart Captor

      I think the reason for it is simply due to the setting. It’s college, and focuses on the students. I definitely don’t remember seeing other student’s parents all that often when I was in college. It makes sense that there’s only a handful of parents that we’ve seen for more than brief glimpses.

      You also need to remember that this kind of story requires drama, but good and competent parenting tends to resolve drama. Throw too many good parents into the story and suddenly all the characters are well-adjusted and making relatively good decisions, and the whole thing falls apart

    3. CJ

      Willis has been working on DOA long before he became a parent, so parents are not his focus.
      And at college age, the really bad parents stick out like a thumb because the good ones let you grow up and worry from the background.

    4. Thulcandran

      I don’t think Joyce’s dad used to be horrible. I think he used to have some messed up religious beliefs that he confronted, but his core personality hasn’t changed. I don’t think Becky would have gone up to ask Joyce’s mom for a ride quite so readily.

    5. Annamal

      Sierra’s dad jumped in against Amber’s dad and Dina’s parent have both been shown to be quietly support.
      Dorothy’s dad is lovely as well.

    6. Wright

      Wow, oops. Sorry, I didn’t realize I was dropping into a touchy topic here. I’m not trying to say that Willis is anti dad or anything. In fact, I was trying to say kind of the opposite. Sorry for sounding like a lot of other really hateful people.

      In my memory, I thought that Joyce’s dad was mostly antagonistic, but I can see that even in the parents weekend he was turning around. And yeah, I completely forgot about Dorothy’s dad, who was supportive of her along with Dorothy’s mom.

      But for everyone else, I really don’t know if they’re good or bad, because we haven’t seen them. I think that you guys are right; this is a college seating and parents really aren’t in the plot much, unless they cause problems. Doesn’t mean it’s some sort of huge sweeping story theme.

      Again, sorry. I just started commenting recently and am not really familiar with the community here, so sorry for sounding a bit harsh.

  29. Reltzik

    Tomorrow: Amber becomes Mary’s friend!

    1. Shiro

      Not nearly enough self-loathing for that yet–not caring if Joe sits by her is like a 12 on the self-loathing scale, and befriending Mary is like a 16…thousand.

      Befriending Mary WHILE whatshisface is hanging off her requires like a 19 million.

      1. King Daniel

        No, no, it’s supposed to be exponential. Having Peter around would upgrade it to 256 million.

        1. Reltzik

          Only if Peter provides just as large of a multiplier as Mary does.

  30. Kalirren

    Talk about someone who needs some love right now…

  31. ailorn

    Amber seriously needs to go to counseling. She is personalizing everything, has an awful mental filter and is very black and white. It can be very good for people to realize that its not all about you, and other people don’t care about your mistakes nearly as much as you do.

  32. Bagge

    “ETHAN is my friend, but that’s probably a fluke… DANNY claims to be my friend to, but he probably hates me now… but now YOU claim to want to makes friends, so you are all clearly part of a vast conspiracy network.”

  33. Gaia

    +5 points for Joe.
    -10 points for Amber.

    That was uncalled for.

    1. Pablo360

      Considering that Amber was absent for most of Joe’s stuff (mentally as well as physically) from her perspective it was totally called for.

      The Joe stuff I mean. Not the self-hatred.

    2. Shiro

      It was a little frantic but given that Amber just found out about the relationship herself, combined with Joe’s…everything before the last 24 hours, I’m not going to be too hard on her for it.

      1. Gaia

        To Shiro and Pablo360
        Panel 4: Joe says he wants to make friends.
        Panel 5: Amber says she dosn’t hate her self enough to even try to be friends with Joe.

        That’s uncalled for, Joe made his intentions clear. (Also Puppy dog eyes :3)

        1. Shiro

          If a known creep came up to me and said he wanted to be friends, I’d react pretty similarly. If not in those words, at least with the same meaning. I don’t blame any girl at IU for regarding Joe with anything on the spectrum from wariness to outright hostility right now.

        2. Fart Captor

          Nobody owes you their time, no matter how politely you ask for it.

          And every woman on campus knows how much of a creep Joe has been. It turns that when you treat women poorly and make a creepy sexual conquest guide of them, they develop very negative feelings about you. The math there isn’t complicated

    3. BenRG

      She’s hurting and she’s responding to that by trying to drive everyone away. In her current state of mind, she’s telling herself that, if she never ever has to interact with anyone ever again, she’ll never be hurt again.

      FWIW, I consider her a possible suicide risk right now.

  34. Rukdug

    Panel 5: “I’m upset and don’t particularly like you…”
    Panel 6: “And now I’m even more upset at myself for saying that out loud to your face.”
    That cycle of thinking is very, very familiar to me.

    1. poofdepoof

      I didn’t realize that that was what was happening.

    2. Jago

      The “upset” part or the “not particularly liking” part?

  35. ADLegend21

    and here we have the two characters who hate themselves the most. Hopefully, they can help each other heal.

    1. Gaia

      You really think it will be that simple?

      1. adjudicus

        Both of them actually have quite a few similarities and could really help each other. They could bond over the fact that both of them had terrible fathers who affected both of them negatively, and are deathly scared of becoming more like them. Amber feels like she’s already the monster her father is and can’t do anything about it whilst hating herself over it, but Joe’s trying to change himself because Joyce has showed him that while he does have the potential to become his father, he still can change for the better. Joe could potentially help Amber realize that she’s not a monster and is many, many times better than her father, while Amber could help Joe realize that his new behaviour still suffers from issues (like his behaviour when interacting with Sarah 10ish strips ago)

        1. thejeff

          And they could bond over their parents fucking.

        2. adjudicus

          I can almost imagine the conversations between them

          Amber:”I’m a monster who’s not worthy of love and friendship, I’ve become as bad as my father, if not worse, and I dont understand why you would want to talk to me.”

          Joe: “…
          Yeah
          …
          Hey, did you know our parents are fucking each other?”

        3. Roborat

          Hopefully, not actually WHILE their parents are fucking.

        4. Gwen

          Also, they both *hate* talking about feelings and showing vulnerability, which will definitely make it easier for them to open up to each other.

    2. helpersea

      When it was Ruth and Billie in this position it wasn’t precisely a healing process though.

      1. timemonkey

        5They were also self-medicating with alcohol and weren’t even attempting to get better, they basically instantly gave up and decided to go down together.

  36. Josh Spicer

    I mean, at this point either Joe sucks up the insult and stays with her and they talk through things OR do nothing and just sit and eat.

    OR…Joe walks away letting Amber wallow because she really doesn’t want him there and he’s learning to respect that so he would.

  37. BenRG

    As with Sarah, it seems that Amber takes a lot of persuading that acts of friendship towards her are not the result of some kind of malign conspiracy!

    1. Fart Captor

      That’s not what’s happening here. Amber is having a hard time believing that this attempt at being friendly and normal is a sincere break from his long-established creepy perv behavior

      Her lack of self esteem is what leads her to let him stay, not what caused her to initially tell him off

      1. Pat

        What she said was really mean. I suspect that’s the cause of the drop in self-evaluation.

        1. thejeff

          Probably true. Completely justified, but she’s still beating herself up for it.

          Cause that’s what she does.

      2. BenRG

        I think that you’re ignoring the broader general issues with her associates that Amber has been demonstrating for quite a while now.

        1. Fart Captor

          Amber doesn’t have any trouble believing that people are sincere when they are nice to her. She just believes that they are wrong to do so because she doesn’t deserve it.

          Sarah doesn’t trust other people. Amber doesn’t trust Amber.

  38. Nobody

    I’d say poor Joe but he deserves this

  39. Pl0x

    Carbs and sugar and fat all the way through, aw yeah.

    1. Bagge

      Sugar and spice and everything nice?

  40. Dave face sand gut

    Wow Amber is way to close to how I feel when people speak to me I need help weird way to realize this

    1. Dave face sand gut

      Too two many I am way to worried bout which 2 it is

  41. BenRG

    For some reason I can see Amber saying something like: “Joe, thank you for caring, on Danny’s behalf as well as mine. However, this is a really awkward situation as you could soon be my sorta-step-brother.”

  42. Leon

    So that’s how you make friends. All the years, I’ve been doing it wrong.

    1. Bagge

      Try telling people random dinosaur facts. Totally worked for Dina.

      1. Pablo360

        Friendship: “Would you like to hear about dinosaurs?”
        Romance: “Would you like to hold hands and look at pictures of dinosaurs?”
        Negotiation: “Would you care to repeat that once I bring out my cloned dinosaurs?”

        1. Bagge

          Rivalry: “YOUR DINOSAUR FACTS ARE SLIGHTLY LESS REPRESENTATIVE FOR THE CURRENT SCIENTIFIC UNDERSTANDING THAN MINE!!!”

        2. 3oranges

          Arch-enemies: “I don’t believe they had feathers, it makes them look stupid and it’s based on Darwin’s theory which has been thoroughly discredited.”

          Alternately, whatever it was that set Cope and Marsh at each other.

        3. JBento

          You mean, “you put its head at the end of its tail”?

        4. Bagge

          Perfect gravatar is perfect

        5. JBento

          Yours is not so bad, but I object to the implication that Dina isn’t ALWAYS the perfect avatar.

        6. Bagge

          Sure, you say that now, but what if you one day find yourself with the need for someone who weighs the same as FOUR atrociraptors, what do you do then, huh?

          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2016/comic/book-6/04-it-all-returns/superglue/

        7. JBento

          Laden or unladen?

        8. Bagge

          I don’t kno… AAAAAAAAAAH!

  43. Kutharos

    I’m sure if I have a sense of enjoyment or sadness at looking at Ember as she pretty much is forming her own world and not evening knowing it.

  44. Potatamoto

    Sadly, the mac & cheese is not Kraft. This makes it unpalatable garbage. I don’t make the rules.

    1. Shadow Eagle

      i thought it was scrambled eggs…

      1. HeySo

        Always check the hover-text. 🙂

    2. HeySo

      Kraft is actually generally the lowest end cheese product you can find (in the packaged or refrigerated sections alike), unless the store carries off-brand/store-brand as well. None of their products are awful, and I enjoy them enough myself to eat them if I can’t find better or if they’re cheap enough on sale to be a bargain, but nevertheless, if you think they’re symbolic of what good cheese products are like then.. you may want to take a moment to expand your horizons some. Go to the deli for cheese, that’s usually the best way to get good quality there. For mac & cheese, ones labeled as organic or vegan or natural or real cheese or so forth are generally the best (in the same way that sodas which use cane sugar instead of corn syrup are generally the best).

      Of course, if you belong to the “deep fried twinkies wrapped in bacon is delicious” taste profile, then you may have a rather sharp deviation in taste expectations from my own. 😛

      In short, Kraft is to Mac & Cheese what Swiss Miss is to Hot Chocolate. Simple, to the point, and with an emphasis on a basic flavor (eg, faux-cheddary and sweet, respectively).

      1. Derek

        oh, it’s sweet? no wonder I hate it!

      2. Potatamoto

        Again, I do not make the rules. I realize that Kraft represents terrible, powdered faux cheese. I always go to my local deli for Swiss, provolone or cheddar to put on sandwiches. I truly love a wide array of cheeses, soft and hard, melted or not, on a variety of crackers and breads.

        But when it comes to actual macaroni noodles and cheese (product) nothing, no matter how normal, or fancy, or artesianal, or big foil tub of stuff you bake, whatever, has actually brought me an iota of enjoyment other than Kraft.

        And none of this garbage with noodles shaped like cartoon characters, or those little tubs you microwave, either. The plain old regular Blue Box. Anything else that calls itself ‘mac and cheese’ is wasting my time. So shall it has ever been, so shall it ever be.

        1. Potatamoto

          And lest I forget…Kraft must be eaten within 30 minutes of preparation. It cannot be reheated nor maintained past that point. Once the orange ‘cheese’ sauce begins to congeal, it too goes past the point of being edible.

          These are the immutable laws of Mac & Cheese.

        2. Ryek Hvek

          Cook up the recipe you find on the box of Muellers elbow macaroni, and report back. (it makes a distant memory of Kraft Dinner)

        3. ValdVin

          Yep. It’s like many other things from your childhood, and mine. (Except Palmer chocolate–nobody misses that.)

          Take Oreos. They aren’t eaten because they’re gourmet, but because they’re Oreos. Any prepackaged chocolate chip cookie I have baked better than, but I’ve tried to make my own Oreos, and it’s not the same.

      3. Roborat

        KD isn’t the best? Blasphemer! Shame the heretic!

  45. Shadow Eagle

    WHY is’nt she in Therapy??????????????????

    1. thejeff

      Because Blaine sent her martial arts class to toughen herself up instead?

      Because she’s a monster who doesn’t deserve that kind of help?

      Because Stacy’s to wrapped up in her own problems to see how badly Amber needs help?

      Because Amazi-Girl’s likes the current situation and is afraid of what will happen to her?

      Because most people with serious issues don’t get the help they need until it gets really obvious, if then.

      1. Joe How

        Amber knows it’s bad, she keeps going on about it. She knows that she needs help and for a while Amazi-Girl was the “help”, but Amber knows that it’s not helping. At some point she (hopefully) will realize she needs help of the non-parkour variety.

        1. Liliet

          But Amber thinks she doesn’t deserve help and can’t be helped anyway. She thinks she’s an irredeemable violent monster, not a traumatized teenage girl in need of counseling.

  46. HeySo

    “mac and cheese, fries, and a cupcake”

    Yep, that’ll do it.

  47. OnyxIdol

    Shitty food doesn’t help with depression.

  48. JBento

    ‘Sup, Americans? I hope the new tax code isn’t going to hurt anybody too much. 8/

    If you want to distract yourselves from your country’s shitstorm, you should take this opportunity to take a look at Spain. Have lots of popcorn at the ready.

    1. Council

      I’m not sure people need another shitstorm as a cure for their own shitstorm.
      It’s not like fire. Not even fire is like that nine times out of ten.

      1. JBento

        I said “distraction”, not “cure”. You want cure, vote better.

        1. Tarmaniel

          Democrats are going to get destroyed in 2018, unfortunately. With the Russia thing being turned on the DNC and Trump possibly hitting 4% GDP growth this year, it would take some kind of miracle to flip that around.

        2. JBento

          It doesn’t help that the Democrats seem determined to wrest a hard-won defeat from the jaws of eager defeat. I nearly rageflipped the table when I found out they announced they were going to start supporting anti-choice candidates.

        3. Fart Captor

          Neither of those things is a big deal. GDP growth doesn’t impress people when their wages have stagnated while the cost of living keeps rising.

          And far right media outlets have been trying to sell the “it was the DNC that colluded” bullshit for a while now, there isn’t even new information behind it. They’re just making a greater effort to spin information that has been out for MONTHS

          That’s playing to his base and that’s about it. The bigger obstacle will be getting out the vote. Dems suck at turning out for midterm and local elections.

        4. thejeff

          Worth remembering that while Dems do generally have lower turnout for midterm and local elections, so does the party in power. The last few cycles that doubled up on Democrats. This time it won’t.
          It didn’t in 2006, for example, which was the last midterm with a Republican in the White House.

        5. thejeff

          Assuming that “possible” GDP actually happens and stays up for another year – and some of it trickles down to the masses, maybe. A couple days of propaganda on the Russian thing doesn’t change the world.

          All the actual signs are still getting worse for the GOP – including the infighting and the inability to actually get anything done.

          It’s politics and a year is a long time. We could have a nuclear exchange with North Korea and that would make it an entirely different world.

        6. BBCC

          http://www.cnn.com/2017/10/27/politics/first-charges-mueller-investigation/index.html

          Well, uh, that ‘it was the DNC’ thing just got super awkward, huh?

        7. Fart Captor

          I’m shocked, just SHOCKED at the completely coincidental timing of this relative to a major propaganda push from right wing media

  49. Deanatay

    *deep inside Amber’s brain*
    Lt Introspection: Sir! We’ve got another fragment of self-esteem forming near the anti-PUA thoughts!
    Cpt Depression: We’ll have none of THAT! Ready the shame torpedoes!

  50. DJFlare84

    Jeezus Amber…

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