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Wrought
Posted on April 21, 2021 by David M Willis
The Dumbing of Age Book 10 Kickstarter continues!  We're past $56K, working our way up to $60K, when we unlock the next character magnet: ERIC (the fingerguns guy)! ONE WEEK left!  Seven days!

303 thoughts on “Wrought”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    with great power comes great HOMPK

    1. Kyrik Michalowski

      We can HOMPK if we want to
      We can leave your friends behimd
      Cause your friends don’t HOMPK
      And if they don’t HOMPK
      Well they’re no friends of mine.

      1. Regalli

        Open the door
        Get on the floor
        Everyone’s a HOMPKing dinosaur!

        1. Clif

          All we are saying
          Is give Hompk! a chance.

        2. Needfuldoer

          HOMPK!’n with the devil

        3. Casi

          HOMPK! HOMPK! HOMPK! señora

        4. carl320

          A crazy little thing called HOMPK

        5. TrueVCU

          We built this city on HOMPK and roll!

      2. The Other Mike

        Your mama don’t HOMPK
        And your daddy don’t HOMPK and roll

    2. Walky_Talky

      All shall run from the fearsome Hompkosexual!

    3. Demoted Oblivious

      What a HOMPKing great intervention!

      Go-go Dina-saur!

    4. Didi

      And that’s why, ladies and gentlemens, Dina is the best character of dumbing of age.

      1. Sean Murphy

        Seconded! And thirded!

    5. ziggy78eog

      Who let the dinos out?
      Hompk! Hompk, hompk!
      Who let the dinos out?
      Hompk! Hompk, hompk!

    6. Jhon

      You annoy the velociraptor, you get the HOMPK!

  2. Doctor_Who

    How Godzilla vs. Kong should have gone.

    1. Adam Black

      im waiting for the porno

  3. Sirksome

    It’s a good thing she got hompked before we had to read the rest of that rant.

  4. JetstreamGW

    Okay now use your claws across her belly, spilling her guts.

    I know they’re usually alive when you start to eat them, but maybe kill this one first.

    1. AGV

      Don’t eat her!
      You don’t know where she’s been

      1. Benjamin Geiger

        Oh, what’s the sound of the world out there?
        Those crunching noises pervading the air?
        It’s man devouring man, my dear
        And who are we to deny it in here?

    2. Demoted Oblivious

      Where’s the fun in killing them first?

      1. JetstreamGW

        If they’re dead, they shut up.

  5. bootshivers

    Time for a REAL fight.

    1. TemporalShrew

      This is no fight: it’s a hunt, and Mary is the prey.

      1. Clif

        And Dana is the answer to our preyers.

        1. Clif

          Dina.

          Curse you, lack of edit functionality.

        2. Demoted Oblivious

          Just sayin’, I love that Dana was a typo but preyer was not. But is not the preyer (presumably one who preys upon) the answer to our prayers (those who pray, not the prayers they utter)?

        3. Needfuldoer

          Maybe we’ll get a little closure re: Dana someday. Hopefully she’s doing better.

        4. RassilonTDavros

          I would love to see that.

  6. Tarpo

    I was on the fence about Hompk initially but consider me a forever Hompk supporter from here on out

    1. BarerMender

      I HOMPK! with that.

    2. plasticwrap

      This. Seriously.

    3. RassilonTDavros

      This just might be my new favorite strip that David Willis has ever drawn.

      1. Sean Murphy

        I feel the same. And the comments are the icing on the greatness cake! I feel like a flop for not being able to come up with anything nearly as clever as the song list at the top of the comments…

    4. Lars

      Dumbing of Age Book 11: HOMPK!

      1. milu

        i mean, yeah

  7. Kyrik Michalowski

    You tell her Dina. And Ruth, don’t listen to Mary. Down that road only murder and madness lie.

    1. motorfirebox

      Murder and madness, you say… what’s that address again?

      1. JediMB

        1428 Elm Street

  8. crow

    Is there anything in the Bible about Hompking?

    1. Stephen Bierce

      The Seven Trumpets of the Apocalypse in Revelation, I’m sure.

      1. Doctor_Who

        Were they blown by velociraptors? I could see there being velociraptors in Revelation, it’s weird enough.

        1. Human Bean

          Thanks for that mental image, it had me laughing out loud xD

    2. OBBWG

      Michael 5:17 – “Blessed are the Hompkers for they shall inherit the Park of the Jurassic.”

    3. Tenzhi

      Didn’t Joshua march around a city seven times Hompk’ing to bring the walls down?

    4. MugiwaraNoPancakes

      From my understanding, the bible says that Jesus used to ride around on a giant chicken that constantly HOMPK’ed

    5. milu

      jesus hompk!ed the merchants out of the temple. they must’ve flipped their entire shit if he was half as scary as Dina.

    6. Bruceski

      One early Rabbi in the Talmud was quite vehemently against it, but others argue that was a product of the time and not a particular interpretation of the Torah.

    7. ziggy78eog

      And on the first day, the Lord hompked, and it was good.

  9. Proto_Eevee

    Enemy terminated

    1. Deanatay

      ITYM HOMPKinated

      1. Demoted Oblivious

        Come with me if you want to HOMPK!

  10. Sirksome

    Also is it just me or is coveting one the most unfair sins. Like basically everyone covets something. It’s practically human nature to want things. Right now I want a slice of pizza. Guess I’m going to hell for that.

    1. Nono

      I think that the general rule of thumb is that it’s okay to have temptations, it’s being able to be strong enough that they don’t rule you.

      So sure, totally side eye that apple pie. As long as you don’t let it bankrupt you with its layers of the warm, gooey apples and perfectly flaky pastry.

      1. Yotomoe

        The difference between “I want that apple pie”
        to
        “I broke the neighbors window and stole their apple pie instead of just asking for a slice.”

        1. Durandal_1707

          You’re in “thou shalt not steal” territory now, though, which is a completely separate commandment.

        2. Yotomoe

          Fair enough. The difference between “I want that apple pie”
          to
          “I’m gonna let them know that the apple pie they have should be mine! ALL PIES SHOULD BE MINE WAAAAAH”

        3. Rex Vivat

          “All pie is my pie. That is the nature of pie, sir.”

        4. Yotomoe

          “Even the individual ingredients that will one day become pie are retroactively mine.”

        5. milu

          “or as the case may be, later-actively, idk the jargon, i think you get the point”

        6. DrunkenNordmann

          I think George Carlin once pointed out that if you look a bit into the 10 Commandments, there’s actually a lot of overlapping going on.

        7. Demoted Oblivious

          Yeah, he boiled it down to don’t fuck or kill. Might’ve been less.
          Stealing: That’s fucking over the owner.
          Coveting thy neighbors wife? Just steps away from adultery, so still just don’t fuck around.
          Etc.

        8. Yotomoe

          The first 3 commandments are just “I’m god. There’s no other gods just me. Seriously there’s no gods so if you’re worshipping something and it’s not me, you’re doing it wrong”
          That’s 3 of the commandments.

        9. Sean Murphy

          I’v never understood why more people don’t have a problem with those first three Commandments, or the fact that not taking Allah’s name in vain comes in ahead of murder… (My use of the Arabic word for God is a linguistic thing and not a political nor religious commentary. Just sayin’.)

    2. Yotomoe

      I guess it’s for openly coveting? Yeah it seems like bullshit to consider wanting more stuff a sin. I guess it’s like looking at your neighbors stuff and saying “oh hey I want all that stuff because they have it” But at the end of the day you can’t really change how you feel.

      1. thejeff

        But you can change how you feel. It’s just hard work.

        Attachment to desire leads to suffering.

        1. AGV

          Is this that star wars quote about how feelings will make you a sith

        2. thejeff

          No. It’s a paraphrase of part of the Four Noble Truths of Buddhism.

    3. Doctor_Who

      In hell all pizza is Chicago style.

      (flees any commenters from chicago)

      1. OBBWG

        In Hell all pizza is Hawaiian.*

        QED it is not real Chicago style. No self-respecting Chicago-style pizza includes pineapple.

        *Source: The Good Place

        1. King Daniel

          Yeah, honestly, who ruins a good pineapple pizza by putting giant slices of ham on it

        2. SuperZero

          Use bacon.

        3. Bicycle Bill

          You know what the Norwegian said the first time he saw a pizza?

          “Hey, who barfed on my lefse?”

        4. Demoted Oblivious

          I heard it was someone saying, “who puked on the bannok?”

      2. SeanR

        I’ve heard it said that “Hell is other people.” Chicago, and for that matter New York, have a lot of them. I’d not want to live in either.
        So, Chicago style or New York style, the road to Pizza Hut is paved with good intentions.

        1. Demoted Oblivious

          You correctly spelled Hell after Pizza. That is all.

    4. Ferret

      The entire point of Christianity is that no matter what you do, you’re a sinner, so the only way to go to Heaven is through Jesus’s sacrifice. Which, conveniently, means following their doctrine and doing what they say.

      1. SeanR

        There are a lot of doctrines under the umbrella of what is called, or self-defined as, Christianity. Many of which are incompatible across denominations. Some of which I strongly suspect Jesus would have words about. Sharp, cutting, words. The type that pass right over your head, or that you can’t, quite, take as an insult, but that are obvious to others.
        I suspect he’d label a LOT of “Modern” Christians as the equivalent of Pharasees. Especially the ones who use their interpretation of the Bible to excuse abusing others or interfering with their self-ownership.

      2. Sean Murphy

        Not just no matter what you do. If you never commit a single sinful act, you are still a sinner damned to hell because the Serpent told Eve the truth after God lied to Adam, and they both ate the pomegranate of Knowledge of Good and Evil. Because God hates you for things your great great great grated great grandparents did, and more.

    5. sultryglebe

      When coveting comes up, all the things mentioned are things belonging to one’s neighbor. So merely wanting pizza is fine, but wanting to have my pizza instead of me having it will make it harder for you to love me.

      Of course, Mary doesn’t seem to love any of her neighbors, or to find that a problem.

      1. Miri

        You need to reinterpret “neighbours” as “kindred spirits” I think: she’s fond enough of people who agree with her hatred-dressed-as-religion bigoted bastardisation of an interpretation of the teachings of a dude who wandered around largely reliant on others’ generosity for food etc while he preached love and tolerance, if the slobbering all over her boyf was anything to go by.

    6. Stifyn Baker

      Coveting isn’t “wanting things”. It’s “wanting what other people have, simply because they have it.”
      The key phrase in covetousness isn’t “I want”, but rather “It’s not fair!”

      1. Miri

        … It’s my 3 year old’s “I don’t want to eat my supper but I really don’t want anybody who is actually hungry to eat it instead either” but for adults? O.o

      2. milu

        hm that makes a lot of sense.

        the 10 commandments look a lot like a constitution for a society, and with this “don’t covet” thing it sounds like Moses is warning the people of Israel that getting rebellious about social inequalities is a very bad sin that will not be abided?

        1. Demoted Oblivious

          Oooh. There’s an explicit definition of a classist stance. I never heard it read that way but I like it. Yet another reason to despise religion.

        2. SuperZero

          “That’s not what it says, but I like it because I can hate it,” is a… weird take.

    7. Clif

      You might have a point if it stopped at “Thou shalt not covet” but in fact it continues on to limit the things you will not covet to stuff that belongs to your neighbor. So wanting stuff is okay; wanting other people’s stuff is not.

      Unless, of course, the other people live far enough away that they aren’t your neighbor, which presumably makes it okay again.

      Surely the wives of little green men from Arcturus are not covered.

      1. Sean Murphy

        Since God ordered His Chosen people to covet the land of the Canaanites (and in fact to murder every last man woman and child in order to steal it), yeah living far enough away to not be neighbors apparently does make it okay in God’s eye.

    8. thejeff

      There’s a lot of words here to explain away what’s pretty clearly in the Bible. It can’t really mean that, right? That’s too harsh.

  11. Spencer

    More face faults in DoA pls

  12. Nono

    I’m actually wondering if anyone has raised the ‘actually, the Bible didn’t originally outlaw homosexuality, most of that perception is due to decades of misinterpretation’ argument to Mary.

    1. Yotomoe

      It would probably fall upon deaf ears, much like most of Mary’s rhetoric does in general.

    2. Patrick Duke

      She’s likely a King James-only truther. According to the KJ Only Movement, the KJV is the only truly divine-inspired translation. All the other versions, even the earliest ones, have man’s corruption in them, but this one was a “new revelation” from God.

      1. Yotomoe

        Ah so like me with Power girl where I say only the Conner/Palmiotti run is canon and everything else doesn’t count.

        1. Jeff K!

          I will absolutely stand behind the original All-Star Comics run that she was introduced in, but it’s still a ways behind that Conner/Palmiotti run.

          Frankly, anything Conner and Palmiotti do together is golden.

        2. StClair

          it was so good

        3. Yotomoe

          I have a character named Super who is…more or less based on that EXACT iteration of Peeg.

      2. Stifyn Baker

        I’ve never understood why the “King James” version was so down on homosexuality, given the overtly political ambition of the translators, and their desire to please a king who was both openly homosexual and a known (by his contemporaries) pederast.

        1. DrunkenNordmann

          Because the “rules” don’t apply to the ruling class.

        2. deliverything

          A thought occurs to me: is it possible that having the ruling class break these rules is an intentional feature? A way of expressing authority in the form of “I don’t have to follow this rule, which proves I’m better than you”? That kind of mindset could go some way toward explaining the way certain politicians so vehemently oppose things they themselves do… and perhaps breaking the rules and getting away with it might raise their status amongst their similarly-corrupt peers.

        3. WestRider

          Yeah, this is a pretty basic feature or authoritarianism in general. Rules only apply to the lesser people.

        4. Yotomoe

          Control. The more you tell people they “can’t” do something the more you control people, hypocrisy be damned!

        5. SeanR

          Literally.

        6. thejeff

          Possibly performative. Even if it was an open secret that he had male lovers, that doesn’t mean he would want to come out publicly in favor of homosexuality. Being particularly harsh on it would be hypocritical, but also serve as a counter to rumors about him.

    3. Jane

      That would require Mary to actually consult the bible, instead of just using to justify her already-established beliefs and prejudices. It’s not impossible that she’d listen to a proper theological argument, but I believe there’s a fair amount of evidence against that that possibility.

    4. Mariah Hardnett

      One could also argue that the bible didnt mention lesbianism so its technically not a sin.

      1. BBCC

        Many interpret Romans as condemning girl on girl.

        1. milu

          just gave that chapter a read, and i kinda love the rant at the end (this is 21st century King James):

          “They are whisperers, backbiters, haters of God, spiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, … And knowing the judgment of God, that those who commit such things are worthy of death, they not only do the same, but have pleasure in those who do them.”

          Sign me up =D

        2. Jhon

          Ooh, “inventors of evil things” … I’m excited now.

          ( are we talking about carla )

      2. Miri

        “Do not lie with a man as with a woman”: you need to do different things to get their rocks off, don’t be a lazy lover, that’s selfish.

        1. darkgloomie

          So what the bible is really against is humdrum sex

        2. Demoted Oblivious

          Alt read: This is not about the act of sex, but rather honesty. It’s the original Bro’s before Ho’s. i.e. You might lie to your woman, but do not treat men that way.

          aka, another sexist rule, but also, implies that one should prioritize honesty and intimacy with your bro’s above that of women. Really to take it all the way, sex with women is just for procreation, not to be enjoyed. Sex with dudes though, have at ‘im and have fun.

        3. King Daniel

          That interpretation only really works in the English translation, though.

  13. Cattleprod

    Agatha just enjoying the show. Yes, this is indeed a normal turn of events.

    1. Regalli

      It’s just so satisfying to see Mary’s hateful bullshit interrupted in ways she can’t in any way argue with.

      Bonus points when it’s via velociraptor kinning by a queer atheist. So many things Mary hates, all at once. It’s beautiful.

      1. Nono

        One of the greatest weapons against people stuck on repeat is to do something so incredulous it fries their tired programming.

        Works on bigotry and people who clearly just need some coffee.

      2. Tan

        Dina is a treasure

    2. ASTAPHE

      Agatha is all of us

    3. Keulen

      Agatha smiling as Mary gets HOMPKed at by Dina is my favorite part of this strip. Now if only she had some popcorn.

  14. RassilonTDavros

    I would say that nothing today has made me happier than Mary getting shut up for once… but George Floyd’s murderer being convicted is pretty damn near impossible to beat.

    Shame it wasn’t first degree, though.

    1. Wizard

      It’s good that it wasn’t first. That would have been just about impossible to prove, especially since that wasn’t what happened. Over charging so that a cop walks is a classic prosecutor’s trick. I’m glad that in this case, the prosecutor brought appropriate charges and got a conviction.

      1. RassilonTDavros

        …yeah, I had a bit of a brain fart there and forgot what the actual difference between first- and second-degree murder was. Insomnia will do that.

    2. Needfuldoer

      The look on his face when the judge read the verdicts was priceless. It was like he bluescreened.

  15. Yotomoe

    Just gonna say I’m not gonna have a new comic today. Taking the night off. I already know who’s next though.

    1. Kyrik Michalowski

      I look forward to it and can’t wait to see who. Enjoy your night off dude.

    2. butts

      Hey man, we appreciate the service to humanity regardless

    3. Newllend(henryvolt)

      Right on man, right on.

  16. brasca1

    What’s your problem Mary? According to your religious beliefs dinosaurs don’t exist and by extension neither should Dina.

    1. King Daniel

      We don’t know that Mary believes dinosaurs don’t exist; under the beliefs Joyce (and Willis by extension – it’s not exactly an uncommon creationist teaching, I myself was taught the same) was raised by, dinosaurs coexisted with humans but started being overhunted/gradually dying out after the Flood, ultimately going extinct generally sometime during the medieval period. That’s where all the exaggerated-in-the-retelling stories of dragons come from, y’see.

      1. Miri

        NGL, even though as an agnostic Jew I’m about as far from a fundie as you can get I do kinda want there to be unexplored pockets of the world where dinosaurs still roam, or continued to do so for millenia longer than we currently have evidence for (in dinosaur form rather than as birds)…

        I am aware that there is no evidence pointing towards this but it would be pretty cool (and also in terms of “maybe the planet and its creatures are more robust than we thought?” it’s a hopeful idea).

        And could lead to Dina leading an actual pack of small predatory dinosaurs on a Mary hunt…

        1. Jhon

          You and George Edward Challenger.

        2. milu

          look i’m all for finding still extant mesozoic creatures, but i should also point out that there’s been quite a few other major extinctions in life’s history so, i’m not sure what finding surviving dinosaurs would tell us about the resourcefulness of life in general…

        3. Sean Murphy

          Plus, the fossil evidence shows that the average time before any specific species of dinosaur went extinct is somewhere between 2 and 5 million years, and this was all during the Age of the Dinosaurs and does not include the Great Extinction. Even if dinosaurs continued in some pocket of the Earth, there would be no recognizable ones.

    2. Rainhat

      …Dina is a person, though.

      Like, Daleks aren’t real, but a person can still chase, I dunno, Walky around shouting “Exterminate!” without causing a logical problem.

      Can we have that,btw? 😉

      1. brasca1

        Lucy is the resident Dr. Who fan… but she might be into playing some games with Walky;)

  17. Regalli

    I appreciate Agatha’s little smile. Like, ‘ah yes. Mary’s getting attacked via dinosaur roleplaying. All is right with the world.’

    Or maybe that’s just me. But I bet most of the hall would also smile upon witnessing this.

    … Also, what precisely does Ruth covet here, Mary? You’re gonna need to be more specific if it merits emphasis.

    1. Sirksome

      Coveting is like the catch all sin. Although my guess is Mary’s probably talking about Ruth’s desire to consume alcohol or her desire to be a more emotionally balanced person not in a near catatonic depression. Oh, Ruth also really wants the Leafs to win even once! Oh! And Ruth’s unending desire for femurs. You could go all day with this.

      1. Regalli

        Fair. But you’d think alcoholism would qualify under gluttony or inebriation or something.

        Probably the Leafs thing, yeah. There’s miracles and then there’s THAT.

        1. Sean Murphy

          There’s in no Commandment against inebriation. It’s not really a sin in God’s eye, or at least not when stacked up against the really serious ones like worshipping who you choose or taking the Lord’s name in vein…

    2. Doctor_Who

      Ruth covers the Leafs winning the Stanley Cup in her lifetime.

      She tried to sell her soul to Satan for it, but even he has limits.

      1. Regalli

        Satan: What do I look like, a miracle worker?
        Ruth: I mean you were an angel.
        Satan: Trust me, not even God could pull THAT one off.

    3. Nayann Martinelli

      “Also, what precisely does Ruth covet here, Mary? You’re gonna need to be more specific if it merits emphasis.”

      Honestly, Between having Mary clarify that point and seeing her chased away by a scientifically accurate dinosaur impersonation, I’d take the latter.

      1. Regalli

        I mean yeah, I just want to know what specific new points to add to the Mary is a Hateful Miserable Sack of Bongos list. It’s helpful to catalog the specific varieties of bigotry on display whenever she opens her mouth.

    4. BBCC

      Agatha is an angel and we’re all thrilled she’s here.

  18. Wagstaff

    Well, aside from scientific accuracy, this new sound may prove pragmatic in use after all!

  19. Dave Van Domelen

    It’s a beautiful day, and you are a horrible Utahraptor.

    1. King Daniel

      Untitled Halszkaraptor Game

  20. Cheshrin

    Happy Birthday, Ruth. Your present shall be Mary suffering.

    1. Cheshrin

      Well that’s an apropriate gravatar if I ever rolled one.

      1. NotThatDrew

        Indeed

  21. NotThatDrew

    Shame Dina doesn’t have the claw to go with her hompk!s. Not only would it help complete this impression, we’d have a way to get Mary once and for all

  22. TemporalShrew

    Honestly, it should have been obvious from the start how effective HOMPK would be – geese still use the strategy to this day!

    1. Jhon

      Do not bother a nesting goose.

  23. Some1

    I wonder what would be worse, a Mary who is nice but still homophobic/transphobic, or a Mary who is mean but not homophobic/transphobic? I feel like the former might lead to some “we want our jerk back”ness as Mary becomes obsessed with keeping everyone’s souls safe from temptation while the mean Mary simply doesn’t care.

    1. Spencer

      The former is just Joyce pre-2015.

      Mary’s, for lack of a better term, not fun when she’s a bigot and not threatening enough that her bigotry is a motivation in front of actual power. Being an unlikable asshole who gets clowned all the time without delving into actual harmful shit is the best possible use of Mary as a character because no one’s ever going to like her unless the core of Mary’s character gets rewritten (ie: realizing in full what she’s done and genuinely trying to make amends), but she’s not enough of a threatening antagonist that defeating her provides any real catharsis so instead we’ve got an unsympathetic jerk who pops up every once in a while to rain on everyone’s parade and instead of just being told to fuck off or clocked in the face Dina uses her aggressive honking to chase her away.

      1. Sirksome

        The way I see Mary now is to use a wrestling analogy, kind of like a heel meant to put other people over. This time it’s Dina. Her dialogue and general characterization is like a heel saying your hometown sucks before Steve Austin walks out and gives them a Stone Cold Stunner so the crowd can pop!

        If Dina obnoxiously “hompked” at anyone else we wouldn’t like her as much, but Mary can take that bullet and we get a fun Dina strip because of it. It’s up to the reader to decide if it was worth it, but we really don’t get a strip like this without Mary. Her existence is almost a service.

        1. Spencer

          Huh, a heel is a pretty good analogy.

        2. Regalli

          Honestly that’s part of why I’m hoping her rivalry with Malaya subplot gets going again – Mary’s a low-stakes antagonist, but the strip can’t sustain itself on kidnappings and supervillain dads full-time. Mary is just the right amount of actual threat if given the opportunity (again, blackmailer who uses her faith as a cudgel) to be worrisome, but too transparently awful to end up in that position often. Plus, it gets us things like Carla’s Rube Goldberg machine and this. Malaya’s in a good position because they’re on the lower-drama stakes side of the story and have just enough reason for being abrasive for Mary to bring out entertaining aspects rather than ‘ugh Malaya, why are you like this’ ones.

        3. Needfuldoer

          I wonder if we’ll see them butt heads in another art class this semester. (Well, Mary butting her head against Malaya’s wall of indifference, anyway.)

        4. He Who Abides

          I’m kinda hoping that Mary figures out that Joyce’s an atheist, and tries making her a new “toy”. It’d make a good story (the threat of Mary outing Joyce), and then Ruth and/or Sarah would have good reason to go full Kingsman on her ass.

        5. Wizard

          So Mary is the designated jobber?

        6. Tan

          Mileage may vary, as I would like Dina perfectly well HOMPKing at Walky, or Joyce, or Danny, or Joe, or Robin, or Lucy.

    2. Regalli

      ‘Nice’ bigotry is worse, full stop. People like Mary fucking WEAPONIZE it, and it usually takes the form of concern trolling and ‘hate the sin, love the sinner’ patronizing bullshit. Like, nope! When you’re defining my sin as existing, I say you can go fuck yourself. (And you can absolutely get that bullshit even if you’re not doing anything more than existing as a queer person.) It’s cruelty in a candy coating.

      Some people grow, of course, and there are genuine Joyce types who haven’t encountered that ‘do you think something’s wrong with me’ moment yet, but there’s enough ‘Why are you so upset when I tell you you’re going to hell? I did so nicely!’ out there that I could absolutely see Mary using it as a tactic in a few years.

      Not that a blackmailer with no ideology to hide behind beyond sadistic self-interest is a good thing either – how’s it going, Blaine – but since Mary’s a college freshman she has less pull and power than the mob stooge.

      1. milu

        if only stupid religion people would limit their abuse to calling queerness a sin and believing queer people will burn in hell or whatever; that’s just noise.

        1. milu

          upon reflection, that was an insensitive remark maybe. it’s all well for me to say because i’m an atheist and my family while religious is pretty chill about queerness.

        2. Regalli

          My family are by and large perfectly fine with gayness, but there’s a reason I’m not out to certain branches and a reason I wasn’t really out in high school. It’s definitely less bad than the actual violence and harassment, but the ‘polite’ homophobia is always on its heels feeling more ‘reasonable’ by comparison while not actually being at all different in opinion. Of course violence against the gays is wrong, but would you really force a city official to recognize a gay wedding when it goes against their religious beliefs? And it’s not that they have anything against trans people in general, but if they’re allowed to use public bathrooms then *transphobic rhetoric I don’t even want to type in derision.* The ‘nice’ form tends to be a front for the same garbage beliefs and support of harmful legislation, but with a pleasant front that lets them act affronted when you get upset. In other words, not entirely certain if you were disagreeing with me or not, but since I don’t think I got it across in the first place: ‘Nice’ bigotry is still bigotry, and I agree that the digs are usually accompanied by support of harmful policies or worse, which is a far bigger issue. But the politely telling you you’re damned for existing is exhausting in its own right because it tends to be a pervasive attitude, not one lone Mary who can be brushed off.

          You can kind of see the attitude in play with the Church Visit Home after the first kidnapping – OBVIOUSLY Ross took it too far, but he was just concerned about the sanctity of Becky’s soul! Who wouldn’t do anything to protect their kid, up to and including causing a police shootout if she won’t acquiesce to his demands? Or the bit where Carol tells Becky she doesn’t have to take the communion wafer if she ‘feels she might not be right with God.’ (Reference, because it’s a fucking GREAT Becky moment: https://www.dumbingofage.com/2016/comic/book-6/04-it-all-returns/remembrance/ ) Not violence, of course, they’re reasonable about it, but a constant reminder that You Are Not Welcome and that they wouldn’t have her back if Ross showed up again. As proceeded to happen by bailing Ross out, and probably being absolutely SHOCKED he immediately proceeded to kidnap Becky and Joyce again. (Similarly, the lunch with John and his being more upset about Joyce being angry someone POINTED A GUN AT HER than he is about the guy who pounted a gun at his baby sister. And note that the moment John’s in the parking lot with someone he assumes is like-minded, he starts saying what he really feels and it’s far less polite. Gotta imagine Jocelyne considered losing the ride home a dodged bullet in that respect, given we know she tries to avoid getting into those heated discussions to avoid ‘saying something she can’t take back.’)

        3. milu

          Oh yeah, you’re absolutely right. The rhetoric of sin and hell is not harmful in what people may or may not believe happens after death, as I can apparently be dumb enough to let myself believe sometimes, it’s harmful because it’s really about the here and now, it’s really about making some things “sacred” as a means to hoisting them out of reach of any rational argument, or even any moral argument. And that’s fucking dangerous, as is constantly being proved all around us.

          thanks for setting me straight, and sorry for the nonsense up there.

    3. Yotomoe

      This is just me but I like shitty people. People who are assholes are fine by me. But being bigoted is just sort of a frustrating character trait. You can be an asshole all you want as long as it’s not a specific stance you take against people with little choice in the matter. Complaining about gays is like complaining about grass being green. Grass is green dude. You’re just gonna have to get used to that. I’d rather have someone arbitrarily kick me in the stomach than tell me that all black people Steal or something.

    4. Mariah Hardnett

      I think mary is a little outdated now i think christains try to veil their homophobia and focus on transphobia as the new target. Its more like yes homosexuality is a sin but we all sin i sinned the other day by raising my voice to my husband. Stuff like that.

      1. King Daniel

        Oh, Mary’s transphobic too. There was a whole subplot about it.

      2. Thag Simmons

        they don’t try all that hard

  24. Retrikaethan

    idk if dina was already my favorite but she definitely is now. everytime that fundy nutter opens her mouth i want someone to slap her. HOMPK is close enough.

    1. RassilonTDavros

      I strongly relate to both Dina and Ruth (Joyce is probably in third place), so seeing one stick up for the other makes me very happy.

  25. Kyrik Michalowski

    I look forward to it and can’t wait to see who. Enjoy your night off dude.

    1. Kyrik Michalowski

      This was supposed to be a reply to Yotomoe but somehow it ended up here.

  26. MrSmith

    I’m finding Ruth in this and yesterdays comic interesting. There seems to be a complete and utter lack of interest going on, sure playing along with Mary and not rising to her bait is not a bad way to counteract her efforts but not reacting to someone shouting Hompk is a little unsettling, for me anyway

    1. Azhrei Vep

      In Ruth’s defense, it’s Dina. I think everybody who isn’t close to Dina just accepts anything she does now, when they notice her at all.

      1. Miri

        Becky still woke up with a jump and minor head injury at being woken with a HOMPK instead of a ROAR though…

  27. tim gueguen

    I can’t remember if we’ve been told if Mary is a Young Earth or an Old Earth Creationist.

    1. milu

      is she even a creationist? i mean probably, but you can be socially reactionary without being scientifically obtuse. (not that i care very much in her case)

  28. Moon

    Lust, Coveting, Nausea, Heartburn, Indigestion, Upset Stomach, Diarrhea

    1. Yotomoe

      If you’re suffering from one or more of these symptoms ask your doctor if Christ is right for you.

    2. RacingTurtle

      Hey! Pepto Bismol!?

    3. Sean Murphy

      Okay, that flowed so beautifully it almost brought a tear of joy to my eyes…

  29. King Daniel

    Hompk

  30. Yotomoe

    “raising your fists in violence”
    I feel like that’s the weirdest contention. Not only has the bible been used to legitimize a LOT of violent behavior historically…The bible doesn’t even abhor violence! People fight and kill each other all the time in it!

    1. Nayann Martinelli

      It’s only weird if you think the argument is made in good faith, because for a lot of scumbags the bible is a convenient excuse to do evil.

      1. Spencer

        She’s talking about that time Ruth slapped her so hard she left an imprint of a dick on her face.

        1. Sirksome

          I mean I guess “in fairness” that is technically a win for Mary, but no one really gives a shit since she’s soured every relationship on this floor. That actually makes it kind of sad.

    2. BarerMender

      Besides, it was Billie who raised her fist in violence. I don’t recall Ruth doing that.

      1. King Daniel

        As Spencer mentioned above, Ruth did as well (an action which she even apologized to Mary for after her return from the hospital, as I recall).

      2. Sirksome

        Here it is:https://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/04-the-whiteboard-dong-bandit/male-anatomy/

        And actually even with context this was probably pretty fucked up for Ruth to do. But it’s Mary so?

        1. Yotomoe

          I mean yeah that probably should’ve cost her her job or something but this is a silly comic with silly comic punchlines so I’m not gonna overanalyze it. (It does always feel weird to justify an unreasonable response since the person it’s against is generally a pill but honestly I would’ve laughed regardless of who it was and Mary was the best option for a guilt free chuckle)

        2. Regalli

          Also it’s been clear that literally nothing including Ruth actively being unable to perform her job will get the poor woman fired, so.

          Thanks once again to Grampus the Guardian Demon for THAT one.

        3. Mariah Hardnett

          I honestly think ruth would be fine with being fired at this point. She has no real friends now than billie and her is over and the power dynamics kind of stop her from finding a healthier environment.

        4. RassilonTDavros

          Once I have the time I’m considering writing a fanfic where Clint dies once per chapter, just to see how many ways I can think of to kill him. Kind of like the spiritual antithesis of LAWsome.

        5. Regalli

          I would most certainly read that fic.

        6. Jhon

          Will there be a HOMPK!
          ?

        7. RassilonTDavros

          Dina will probably get a turn at some point, yes.

        8. Roborat

          See if you can get a count higher than Kenny did.

        9. Thag Simmons

          Well, Ruth brought it up when she tried unsuccessfully to get herself fired

        10. Demoted Oblivious

          As much as I oppose corporal and capital punishment, there are some people who really do deserve to have a dick slapped onto their face. Was Ruth wrong to hit? Yeah sure, but I wouldn’t be a reliable witness if I got to see it and Mary tried to press charges.

        11. BarerMender

          No fists there. That was a slap.

    3. Wizard

      Heck I remember at least one case where God got pissed off at the Israelites for not killing enough.

    4. Keulen

      There are plenty of passages in the Bible where God pretty much tells people to kill other people, or does the killing himself with floods and plagues and shit. So yeah I’m not so sure the God of the Bible is all that against violence.

  31. Josh Spicer

    Oh Dina.

    YOU don’t need to change. Continue hompking to your heart’s content.

  32. Dragonfire

    And I will HOMPK down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my sisters.

    1. Demoted Oblivious

      What?!

      1. Silas

        it’s a reference to Pulp Fiction – specifically this scene https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-K8qi_AoXI when Samuel L. Jackson quotes a fake bible verse magnificently

        1. Demoted Oblivious

          What?

        2. thejeff

          Say “what” again, I dare you.

  33. Slartibeast Button, BIA

    Is it foggy out?

    1. Demoted Oblivious

      Snowing here.

    2. Needfuldoer

      Nah, it’s just a little hazy. Most of yesterday’s smoke cleared.

  34. Nayann Martinelli

    Go get her Dina, show her who’s the meanest and baddest dino in Indiana.

  35. Nevermaker

    We as a species truly do not deserve Dina.

  36. Throwatron

    wait dina is on to something here, this tactic is powerful. we should all be doing this.

    1. UrsulaDavina

      It works for Canada geese and tbh Mary deserves to be chased by a horde of Canada geese.

      1. Demoted Oblivious

        You misspelled cobra-chicken.

  37. Qube

    ironically, Dina is doing the Lord’s work

  38. Vukodlak

    Hompk… not the word I’d call Mary over and over again but it will do.

  39. butts

    YESSSS DINA

    RIP AND BITE AND TEAR AND KILL

    1. AGV

      *cocks Velociraptor claw* rip and tear

    2. Spencer

      Mary is huge, she has huge guts.

  40. acebender

    there goes Dina, ironically doing the Lord’s work

  41. Delicious Taffy

    Bye, Mary. You’re no good for anyone.

    Just watched The Mist for the first time tonight. Every time Carmody opened her mouth, I was reminded of an older version of Mary.

  42. Clif

    Best Birthday present ever.

    Trust me on this, Ruth.

  43. AutobotDen

    ngl, my mood would improve if Dina aggressively “HOMPK!”ed at anyone who was being a dick to me.

    1. Demoted Oblivious

      It’d be best if she was at your side, doing that as a friend, but if I had the money, I’d employ her to do that.

  44. Robbie

    AGATHA’S FACE!!!! <3

  45. NinjaNick

    Dina used HOMPK! attack.

    It’s effective.

  46. Bagge

    Dina for RA

  47. Mollyscribbles

    ok so Dina has always been Goals™ but now? now I’m gonna order that shirt.
    in about a month because I’ve been trying to space out my impulse purchases because anticipating mail is the only way I’ve been able to look forward to anything.

  48. Carms

    Birthday, improving…

  49. Azhrei Vep

    Man, when I asked why someone hadn’t kicked Mary in the dick already yesterday, I wasn’t expecting Dina to show up the very next day and apparently try it. (Seriously, look at that last panel. She’s going right for it!)

  50. BBCC

    Fuck yeah, Dina. Tear into her.

    Sierra, Agatha, now’s your chance. Take Ruth out for a girl’s day before her big date tonight!

  51. Pocky

    I think we could all use a Dina to sick on zealots

  52. AGV

    Good, now MAUL her!

  53. Beau Kirin Maysey

    Dina utilizes innovative new ways of direct action!!

  54. Bryy

    I love that Dina is sticking up for the rest of the hall.

  55. Lingo

    Oh here’s Mary, in her weird wild-west-bank-robber outfit again.

    ….Why can’t we get a Mary magnet already?

    1. Thag Simmons

      It’s just a red scarf and a brown jacket, she’s not wearing a stetson and carrying six shooters or anything

    2. Rabisch

      Looks more like an old aviator outfit for me.

  56. GUIGUI

    Untitled Dina game.

  57. Disastroid

    It’s the HOMPKy-talk women
    Gimme, gimme, gimme, the HOMPKy-talk blues

  58. Bicycle Bill

    What hath Mary wrought upon herself?

  59. jimbotherisenclown

    Willis can stop writing now. I don’t think there’s any way he can ever top this.

  60. Jabberwocky

    So has Mary just never read Job or what

  61. Lone Duck

    You aren’t happy… But have you tried feeling guilty?

    1. Felian

      ooof i feel that^^

  62. Felian

    Ok, can we reply to ALL of the bullshit with this?

    anti-LGBTI? HOMPK HOMPK HOMPK HOMPK
    nazi demos? HOMPK HOMPK HOMPK HOMPK HOMPK HOMPK
    anti-maskers? HOMPK HOMPK HOMPK
    just…. don’t let them talk, just shut them down with HOMPK HOMPK HOMPK, including SHARP TEETH.

  63. Rabisch

    Only Dina can be cute and aggressive at the same time ♡. Mary will now have dreams with that sound. Troubled dreams that she will not be able to tell anyone.

  64. Sombrero

    Am I the only one to see JAWsomeness in this strip?

  65. Alan in DC

    After getting dick-slapped by Ruth, pied by Carla and leveled by Billie – and all in one semester – you’d think Mary would have learned by now to STFU.

    1. Sirksome

      Nah. Stuff like that never actually reinforces what you want it too. If anything it encourages Mary to be worse and makes her more judgmental. Of course sinful heathens would resort to violence. Case and point she’s using that as an example against Ruth right now.

      For Mary to actually change or STFU she’d need someone she respects or empathizes with, someone who has similar values re-contextualize the flaws in her beliefs. It’s what Becky did for Joyce just by existing. But Joyce has also shown to be way more receptive and caring than Mary ever has been.

  66. darkoneko

    I love how agatha is just “aww so cute”

    It’s ok Mary, according to your branch of nonsense the dinosaurs are less than 6000 years old, anyway.

  67. Billifer Jenningsworth

    We should make HOMPK the new STFU.

  68. Zaxares

    Alright, I retract my momentary good thought about Mary yesterday. XD

  69. milu

    punch nazis, hompk bigots!

  70. BenRG

    Mary’s a real “can’t see the rafter in your eye” personality. Yes, Ruth is far from perfect but she certainly isn’t a vile-spirited bully who, when she was warned off, literally begged Jennifer for permission to be allowed someone to persecute.

    1. Alex

      I think the point is that instead of focusing on Ruth’s real transgressions, Mary is hung up on the fact that she had a homosexual relationship.

  71. Amos Batista

    I wish christians could come just hug me, or eventually offers some advice, when I got into bad days, instead pointing finger against me and saying every sin I’ve commited.
    You know, like any normal decent human.

  72. jonathan young

    HOMPK

  73. Hazel

    Oh, I do love the faces in this one!

    Going back through the archives Agatha is just kind of a good egg. An all around nice gal.

    Dina is also a good egg but it is a dinosaur one.

  74. Koms

    And Mary would have gotten away with it too if it hadn’t been for the pesky HOMPK!!

  75. JessWitt

    Be gay, do HOMPK!

  76. Alex

    Best possible outcome.

  77. FacelessDeviant

    I agree with Dina. That is quite enough bs from Mary.

  78. Biblioholic93

    Yessssss feel your anger Dina. Don’t let anyone tell you what’s appropriate. You know exactly what’s needed.

  79. karishi

    Ruth’s like, “Huh. This makes no sense but somehow my birthday HAS gotten a little better.”

  80. Vulcanodon

    If the Dinosaurs were around less than 6000 years ago, we should be able to get enough DNA to clone them and send them after Mary.

    Oh wait; Dina’s here! Just as good.

  81. Dov

    I wish there was a way to favorite a comic so I can read the update for the day and then click a button to return to this page and reread it to remind myself that the world is a Hompk!in great place sometimes. Guess I’ll just have to save the link 🙂

  82. Freya Liu

    And we are once again reminded why Dina is ABSOLUTELY one of the best characters.

  83. Chris M

    Agatha is us all.

    1. Nyk

      Yes!! Love her genuine smile here

    2. King Daniel

      We were Agatha all along.

  84. Hilzabub

    I know it’s overused, but that was a literal LOL for me.

  85. BlackScarabFilmZ

    I admit I was a little skeptical about the Hompk, but uh… I like it.

  86. Leadsynth

    Now I want magnets of HOMPK!ing Dina and freaked-out Mary

  87. Robert

    The question now becomes: Is Dina just saying “Hompk!” because she is still socially awkward and this is how she says “Hello” or is it because she at least understands that Mary’s confrontational attitude is not polite?”

    1. PB

      It can be both.

    2. SeanR

      Because she recognized the poison that was issuing from Mary’s mouth, and decided to intervene in something that was hateful toward one of her favorite people. Not Ruth, but her girlfriend.

  88. Megz

    Mary is pretty quick to list “Lust” as a “transgression” for someone who was frenching someone in a public hall way like it was the pre-amble for a bad porn not too long ago. https://www.dumbingofage.com/2017/comic/book-7/04-the-do-list/plottwist/

    1. C.T Phipps

      Its been noted that some Fundamentalist have the view that Salvation by Faith alone means that they can do any evil because they are “saved” and thus anyone not “saved” is damned regardless of behavior. This means they become tautological Templars.

  89. C.T Phipps

    Mary will still be alive when Dina starts to eat her.

    1. Demoted Oblivious

      Becky too, will still be alive when Dina starts to eat her.

      Ba-dump, k-slipshine!

      1. King Daniel

        That implies that Becky will have died by the time Dina’s finished. Unless it’s just a little death?

  90. Varangian

    THIS BONGO TALKING ABOUT LUST. FOR REAL.

    GET HER ASS, DINA

  91. Warcodered

    Day’s improving already.

  92. WestRider

    …raising your fists in homosexual lust… 😉

  93. PB

    Shit like what Mary says in panel 1 is why I worry about religiously-based therapists. I know not all of them would blame feeling bad on being sinful but the worry is there.

  94. Jhon

    I think this is the first time Mary has actually seen Dina. Until now they’ve only appeared together in group strips.

  95. Tunasammich

    All right Dina is my favorite now lmao

  96. ADLegend21

    HOMPK

  97. Dara

    DINA IS MY HERO NOW

  98. Merle

    Good Dina.

  99. Juanoku

    Get yourself a friend that hompks in your favor

  100. JA

    HOMPK

  101. Cmd1095

    The best way to deal with Marys. Drown them out with scientifically accurate dinosaur noises.

    HOMPK

  102. Fart Captor

    That last panel is my most favorite face Mary has ever made. Thank you Dina

  103. E. Bernhard Warg

    Looks like the T-shirts are no longer discounted, but while they were, I bought one in the canonical color, plus a black one for greenscreen work (and possibly to wear under my Ghostbusters uniform).

    1. E. Bernhard Warg

      Whoops! looks like the sale is still on!

      Sometimes I like being wrong!

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