147

Yawnchasm
Posted on April 2, 2018 by David M Willis

147 thoughts on “Yawnchasm”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    seems legit

    (I can’t get used to people actually calling Ken by his real name)

    1. Psyme

      Ken? Are you talking about Asian Ethan?

      1. C.T Phipps

        I don’t actually know this Ethan guy. Ken is the star of Shortpacked, though, right? You know, when it was good? 🙂

        1. Annonymouse

          whaaaaat? I missed it? When was that?

  2. Doctor_Who

    True bros can have entire conversations that consist solely of Tim Allen noises.

    1. Sambo

      1. Doctor_Who

        It figures that Bloodrose would comment by saying nothing.

        Gotta stay mysterious, Rosie.

    2. Needfuldoer

      *Confused Tim Allen grunt*?

      *Tim Allen grunt of agreement*

      Sometimes we also do that silent brief eyebrow raise thing when we pass each other in the hallway, I guess.

      1. Needfuldoer

        Ha! Found it.

        https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=srV6Wzsu5Xw

        1. Sunny

          I must say, that’s a highly efficient way of communicating.

        2. Annonymouse

          It also pierces through power tool noise.
          Safety first …. Who am I kidding, Safety is for wimps./s

  3. AnvilPro

    I think Jason and Mike would be great friends

    1. tim gueguen

      Yeah, no.

    2. geno

      Only when Mike is drunk

  4. Marsh Maryrose

    Last panel: absolute truth.

  5. Danni

    i dont think walky actually has any friends

    1. Doctor_Who

      He does, but they’re all girls. Billie, Dorothy, probably Becky by this point, Dina through the transitive property, and Joyce though neither of them will ever admit it.

      1. Regalli

        Yeah, the closest male acquaintance he has is Mike, who should not be counted as anyone’s friend.

      2. Bagge

        Joyce: “WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.”
        Walky: “WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.”
        Dorothy: “Awwww.”
        Joyce and Walky: “DON’T YOU DARE ‘AWW’ US!”

        1. cbwroses

          +1

        2. jeffepp

          And, this was when they were spooning.

    2. Larkle

      He’s friends with Billie. I guess that Joyce and him are kind of friends. I don’t think any guy friends though, but then we don’t see as much of the guys as the girls.

    3. cbwroses

      I’ve thought the same thing before. The only guys he interacts with regularly seem to be Mike and Joe.
      The best you can call the relationship between him and Joe is friend-ly, I’d say.
      And I think Ethan said it best about Mike — something about him not having friends, just people he tolerates standing next to.
      That leaves the ladies, most of which fluctuate from barely tolerating him to being angry at him while still counting him as a friend/in their circle.

      1. cbwroses

        You ever notice that Walky doesn’t talk about friends from home?
        Is it because of him actively avoiding feelings or because Billie was his only friend from home?

        1. C.T Phipps

          I don’t think he’s friends with most girls either. Billie is family, not friendship.

        2. Zee

          Billie and him aren’t related..?
          Unless you mean figuratively through growing up together, but even then that’s friendship

        3. Regalli

          Not only did they grow up together, but Walky’s parents very clearly took her in when her parents didn’t have time for her, especially after Sal was gone. Hence Billie getting a care package from Linda, Billie’s guilt after seeing Sal’s package and realizing she’s the ‘white-passing surrogate daughter’ Linda wanted, and Walky and Sal talking about how he wants to do right by one sister after he screwed up with the other. They basically consider each other a step up from simply ‘grew up together’ because of Billie’s parents’ conspicuous absence and the Walkertons’ conscious efforts to include her.

        4. BBCC

          “Glad they’ve got one daughter they like”

  6. ValdVin

    The buildup is delicious.

  7. Yumi

    Oh, Walky. Develop some healthy male relationships. Support each other emotionally. Hang out together in your pajama jeans.

    1. JessWitt

      One pair of PJ jeans or separate pairs?

    2. Delicious Taffy

      Emotional support was a complete no-fly zone, in all of my previous male friendships. And they could lounge in their boxers for all I cared, but the only way they ever saw my pajama pants was if they woke me up, after which the blue jeans were immediately put on in their place.

      Is that not normal?

      1. begbert2

        It’s normal for me. I’ve always felt that emotional discussions with other men are extremely awkward, and try to avoid them. Unfortunately I ran out of females who’ll tolerate me me a few years ago, so now if I want to vent about emotional matters I have to make things awkward. Ugh. Better to let it just build up and fester.

      2. Daisy

        This is one of those toxic masculinity things. It’s the standard, but it’s an unfortunate standard. There are plenty of dudefolk who will be there for you if you can find them but they have to unlearn a life of “boys don’t cry” and “only girls/gays are sensitive”.

      3. Yumi

        Normal, from my understanding, yes. Ideal? Not so much.
        Unless you’re just referring to the pajama thing, in which case, you do you.

    3. C.T Phipps

      Walky is leading Jason to his bed, isn’t he?

      1. JessWitt

        Right! He’s not that magnanimous, still thinking about his math homework.

  8. toby

    next thing you know he’s gonna be taking jason around again and introducing him to the same people, but this time in a salmon suit

    1. No Name

      Okay, by “salmon suit” do you mean a fish costume, or a suit that’s pink?

      1. BBCC

        Yes.

      2. Regalli

        The fish. (It’s a reference to the Spongebob episode with the pie bomb.)

      3. Woobie

        I wanna see people in fish costumes.
        Because.

      4. Yumi

        https://youtu.be/lr3obI0EV4E

      5. ellernock

        clearly it’s both. a fish costume that’s also wearing a pink suit. one’s formal fish costume. as you do.

      6. Stephen Bierce

        That reminds me. Anybody else agree that “A Salmon Of His Former Self” was a good episode to start the third act of the Dexter And Monkey Master series?

        1. Marsh Maryrose

          Honestly? I think “A Fish Called Wander” might have been a better episode to start with.

        2. Marsh Maryrose

          While I’m at it, Ultra Car would have had a better chance of making it if they’d started with the (never aired) origin story episode, “Finding Demo.”

        3. BBCC

          Nah, the themes of gender, self discovery and antiauthoritarianism were already setting parent groups against it.

          An episode making it clear her parents thought she was a boy first probably would have meant the show would never be picked up, because tv networks are cowards.

        4. Needfuldoer

          Maybe that’s why they aired the few completed episodes out of order, which made the plot hard to follow.

        5. BBCC

          Honestly, the parents had no intention of letting it go on.

        6. King Daniel

          What are you talking about? “A Fish Called Wander” doesn’t hold a candle to “A Salmon Of His Former Self”, especially when you consider the continued callbacks to the latter extending into the next two seasons.

          Though truth be told, it is my personal opinion that “Fish-ion Impossible” should’ve been aired before either of those two. Would’ve made the whole time-travel thing in it make a lot more sense.

    2. Ferret

      Walky’s gonna be wearing a salmon suit?

  9. Some1

    Thinking about it, aren’t Joyce and Walky essentially doing the same thing right now? I.E hanging out with one of the characters anti-villains because they feel bad for them.

    1. cbwroses

      Kinda, yeah. Except Walky isn’t being as altruistic as Joyce since he also wants some tutoring.
      I’d like to think he’d still be doing this regardless, though.

  10. Passchendaele

    yay balrog’s here

  11. Regalli

    *Gentle, loving facepalm* Oh, Walky.

  12. newllend(henryvolt)

    Walky even though plays the role of a fool still knows how’s a bit of the world works.

    On that note I guess if anyone here comes around to asking the question “Why is the comic always and only giving attention to the girls dorm ? Why don’t we ever see what the guys are doing ?” Then we can just use the page as an example why.

  13. Trolldrool

    Wait. He’s 22?

    1. Yumi

      Apparently. Makes sense if he’s doing grad school right after or soon after his undergrad. I think his style of dress and probably speech just throws people off.

      1. Trolldrool

        Yeah, that’s gotta be it. I keep looking at him and nothing about it the character looks twenty-ish to me.

    2. Regalli

      Most TAs are in grad school, so that’s a bit on the young side but easily within bounds if he went straight in from undergrad. Suddenly his utter terribleness at teaching makes more sense though, unless he graduated early it’s probably his first semester.

      1. Nono

        I think many UK people finish undergrad at around 20-22, so that’s pretty reasonable actually.

        It was very weird being around my mid-20s when my classmates were celebrating their 21sts.

        1. Agemegos

          Yeah. A lot of undergrad degrees are three years in the UK and Commonwealth. It’s pretty common to start your undergrad degree at eighteen (I started at seventeen) and finish an honours year or masters at 21.

      2. anonymsly

        Yes, it’s almost like he’s a math major working on a master’s or PhD in mathematics with zero training or natural inclination to teach. Like he’s never taken a single Education course and is a ‘teacher’ only by circumstance of employment.

        It has been amazing to me for years that people in this forum have expected anything at all from Jason. Especially the actual teachers who know how hard their job is. It’s not something that can be done well without training and yet that seems to be exactly what’s expected from him.

        1. thejeff

          I still expect him not to sleep with students and I still expect him not to belittle students.
          I’ve defended him on his lack of actual teaching ability before, on basically those grounds.

        2. kingleon

          I don’t think people realize how little training other than ‘on-the-job’ training that anyone obtaining a graduate degree in a STEM field gets. Fundamentally, universities have for centuries believed that specialized graduate coursework and research theses will cultivate a person who could an excellent insight to being an educator in their field, and that also teaching their field will lead to a greater understanding of their research questions (and I think this is all true). However…. it doesn’t mean some pedagogy training in addition wouldn’t help!

          The problem is that a student’s performance as a TA has no bearing on their ability to graduate with their higher degree, and likely no bearing on their ability to get hired afterwards (certainly, students that get outstanding TA awards from their students can put that on their resumes, but people don’t get dinged for not have those). Thus its very hard to explain to many STEM departments why they should require or even suggest students should put any time or effort into something that isn’t research related.

    3. legobil

      I’m more: Why is he so aloof because he’s a TA and 22 years old? I’m 34 and on my first year in Uni and I do know how to party.

      1. dralou

        Some people are born “old”. Or as some people think the elderly look like anyway: they like their comfort, they don’t see the appeal of loud parties, and go to sleep at 9 PM. Even if they’re in their twenties.

        Also, if you’re into partying, the older you get, the more experienced you are, and you avoid more easily the biggest mistakes.

        1. Needfuldoer

          Have been 40 for the last fifteen years, can confirm.

  14. BBCC

    Jason, you can totally be friends with people below your year in college. You just have to not be a condescending dick.

    Oh. Wait…

    Also, Walky is totally ‘that jerk down the hallway’ isn’t he? With the way he talks about his peers I’d not be surprised.

    Mike doesn’t count – he’s a downright bastard, not just a jerk.

    1. Regalli

      If anyone recognizes Jason as their math teacher that would be weird, but that’s from the TAship and not the age. (Is there a big gap between grad program and undergrad, though? Like in socializing? I imagine it’s probably not super common but only because you’re not likely to have common classes and grad students have pretty limited time for meeting new people.) And yeah, Walky is totally that jerk.

      1. BBCC

        I talked a bit about my personal life with one of my TAs last year – we talked about movies and my relationship with my boyfriend. It is true we never hung out outside class though. People offered when the semester was over, but she had a dissertation to write.

      2. thejeff

        Probably depends partly on if you went to the same school as an undergrad. Then you’d probably still have a social circle from the next couple years of students that you knew as an undergrad. Hell, I wasn’t even a grad student and I still hung out at college for the next couple of years – most of my friends were still there.
        If, like Jason, you’re coming from somewhere else, I’d expect the big gap. You don’t really share activities with the undergrads, other than class, where you’re an authority figure more than a peer.

        1. Regalli

          Those answers both make sense, thanks!

      3. DinaJoyce

        Lots of it depends on campus culture too. Examples I’ve seen: 1 For undergrads, campus = home, a place to relax as well as work. Most schools don’t have on-campus housing for grad students, so to grad students, campus = work. When undergrads hang out on campus, grad students often aren’t inclined to participate. 2 At the place where I did my first grad degree, undergrads were basically all incredibly rich. Grad students usually weren’t. So, the undergrads I knew wanted to go to a fancy restaurant followed by a fancy bar and get lots of fancy drinks and then pay for a taxi to drive them home after they got drunk. Most grad students there (especially Masters students who usually had to pay tuition and didn’t get a stipend) couldn’t afford that sort of thing and therefore didn’t usually hang out with undergrads. 3 Lots of grad students are older and usually in a grad program at least a few will be engaged/married/have kids. When your friends/classmates are all people in this life stage, even if you’re younger and not, the younger life stage feels like moving backwards and isn’t as tempting (for some people at least) 4 some departments really encourage (read: force) their TAs to maintain a “professional distance” from anybody who could possibly be their student. As an MA student I once took an undergraduate class and I tried to befriend the PhD student TA (since I was after all a fellow grad student and was already friends with a member of his cohort). He was super awkward about it and made it very clear that we would only have a student-teacher relationship. This was partially his own social awkwardness, but I think some of it was departmental pressure.

        1. kingleon

          Yeah, all of the above. However, I’m not sure its always ‘departmental pressure’ as much as it is just issues with socializing with people who may not be able to legally drink, or just being jaded after a few years of seeing cohorts of undergrads come through and move on. If you’re in a PhD program long, its hard enough seeing grad student friends appear, fail their prelims, or graduate and leave before you. By my last year of my PhD, I wasn’t interested in making new friends, but rather just finishing my chapters, although I still did make a few.

    2. kingleon

      Its almost always more socially acceptable for grad students to hang out with with faculty (I recall playing beer pong in a prestigious professor’s basement at my grad school) than undergrads. Among many other things, grad students at many schools often involve alcohol, and undergrads are supposed to be kept far away from anything like their potential educators condoning alcohol.

  15. ellernock

    augh, jason has the exact OPPOSITE problem to me. i’m 24 and i get anywhere from like 12-19. i should begin dressing like a pretentious englishman immediately.

    1. Leorale

      If you’re a lady-person, I highly recommend pencil-skirts. They work for me. I’m 32 and femme; in professional clothes, people ask if I’m a lawyer, instead of asking if I’m a high schooler.

      1. Leorale

        But either way, don’t worry, in a few years we’ll both get our grey hairs in, and then we’ll be properly invisible.

        1. Miri

          33 and hoping my white hair’s are going to form a proper stripe because they do mainly seem to loosely cluster… I can totally rock a pure white streak:-D

        2. Needfuldoer

          I’m also early 30s, people always guess early to mid twenties. I still get carded when I buy spray paint, but at least nobody asks why I’m not in school anymore…

  16. Some1

    I was thinking, its April 1st for me, and April 2nd for Willis. So, I kind of want to explore which of the 16 personality types the characters of Dumbing of Age fit into best.

    I would say Joyce is ESFJ

  17. DailyBrad

    Walky’s got a weirdly developed machismo. Like, he has this ideas of expectations, like the stupid shoes saga, pajama jeans, and the friends thing here.

    But he also is very blase about stuff like that he’d suck some dick for some pizza. Which, glad he’s not homophobic, but if we’re going with really dated machismo, you’d almost expect the casual bigotry to be part and parcel. Worst he’s shown on that front was being tonedeaf to Sal’s experiences being less white-passing, and he’s owned up to that with her.

    1. Nono

      You can be casual about your sexuality while still being toxic about masculinity.

    2. thejeff

      While he does have a bunch of messed up ideas about how guys should behave, he’s pretty good about gender in general. Toxic masculinity, if you want to call it that, but without the predatory, demeaning women aspects it’s usually tied to.
      It’s pointed out above that basically all his friends are women.

  18. Delicious Taffy

    Walky, that’s messed up and toxic.

    We also nod at each other.

    1. Josh Spicer

      True. That’s usually the main form of communication amongst those who do not know one another personally but are cool with their existence.

  19. DarkoNeko

    Well…

  20. Keulen

    Most of my friends in college were huge geeks like me. I think it was about even male and female too.

  21. adjudicus

    Off topic, but who’s in the slipshine with Joe?

    1. jeffepp

      With that avatar? You know.

      1. JessWitt

        I was curious myself. Oh wow.

    2. Barf Ninjason

      If a guess I had to venture
      At his partner in that art
      Considering recent events:
      Malaya the human fart

      1. Barf Ninjason

        Y’know, cuz she’s kinda funny but I still wouldn’t want to be around her

        1. Yumi

          It’s a non-canon, April Fool’s day Slipshine.

      2. dralou

        From Willis’ Twitter, it’s confirmed Danny/Joe non-canon Slipshine. I can’t deny I love this use of the April fools day.

  22. Josh Spicer

    I mean…in college…given the situation in which these two have put themselves in and going off what I know of my situation in college…

    He’s not really wrong.

  23. Reltzik

    So THAT’S why I don’t have friends.

  24. Foxhack

    Please tell me Ken’s last name in this universe is Blanka!

  25. Bagge

    …I think Walky is genuinely trying to be friendly? Support and cheer up Jason?

    He sucks at this.

    1. Jago

      At least he tries.

    2. Nono

      Well, until he figures out that Jason banged his sister?

      1. cbwroses

        Eh. I doubt he’d care.
        Unless it somehow aligned with his weird ideas on manliness…

        1. jeffepp

          Walky offered oral sex to Jason. I don’t think that will be an issue.

        2. dralou

          Didn’t he even ask if a wig would help ?

    3. Reltzik

      Well, Jason tried to tutor Walky and sucked at that, so I guess it’s even.

      …. except, you know, Walky’s doing it out of the good of his own heart and Jason did it out of a sense of obligation.

      1. anonymsly

        Jason tried to tutor Walky, who didn’t even pretend to pay attention or make an iota of effort. We have no actual proof that Jason’s effort wouldn’t have helped because Walky made that decision.

        1. cbwroses

          I think it’s the opposite. I think Walky acted like that to Jason BECAUSE he still wasn’t getting it. So feeling frustrated and what have you, he acted more annoying than usual.
          We did see Jason tell Walky he was trying to get it as Walky and them were leaving class.

        2. thejeff

          I suspect Walky was sufficiently freaked out about the mere idea of needing help that he was well into “wacky Walky” disruption mode before they started.

          A better tutor might have been able to get past that. Jason likely met it with snark and insults of his own.

        3. DailyBrad

          True, though Danny got results with Sal, who was trying with Jason, though I don’t think their sexual antagonism with each other helped matters, whereas Danny did a better job forming a genuine rapport with Sal.

  26. Nono

    On an unrelated note, our new non-canon Slipshine gives me life.

  27. Teddae

    hello again, walky’s weird ass standards of masculinity

    1. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet

      [grunts]

      1. Roborat

        -Points fingers and (slightly) lifts one eyebrow.

  28. not someone else

    Okay, Walky’s bull is obvious here, but can I just say that I can’t read Jason’s “I’m twenty-two I can’t befriend 18-19-year-olds” in any tone other than “Mocking Spongebob meme”? It’s not middle school, three years is not a massive maturity chasm.

    1. kingleon

      On many university campuses in the US, the rules regarding the potential enabling influence of those drinking to hang out with those who cannot drink are punitive enough to make even upperclassmen undergraduates uncomfortable to hang out with freshmen… For example, if Jason hung out with a bunch of these freshman, and a bottle of liquor was discovered by an RA in the same room while he was present, the immediate blame would be placed on him, as the over-21 responsible adult. There’s certainly US schools where that might even bring down academic punishments on a graduate student, like probation. So, yeah, the graduate versus undergraduate separation is often quite real.

  29. BenRG

    Sometimes, Walky’s understanding of the short-fallings of modern male socialisation is nearly terrifying in its self-awareness!

    That said, I do get the feeling that Walky is unknowingly leading Jason head-long into a completely unexpected crisis that may make or break his career at IU.

    1. Jhon

      We need Jason.
      Unless we’re going to give up the whole ‘Walky has trouble with his grades’ thing.

      I’ll miss Penny because she’s eye candy.

  30. Ainara

    This just gives further proof to the theory that Eric’s face is stuck that way

  31. Agemegos

    I find this rather strange. When I was Walky’s age we talked to each other and played sports, and considered dolls and cartoon shows childish.

    1. cbwroses

      Well, unless you’re significantly older than me, it must be a cultural thing, because when I was his age, we watched cartoons in hs, if any of us played sports it was generally on the hs team, and we’d been giving the head nod + ” ‘sup?” To every guy except those we were really, really cool with.

      1. Agemegos

        I started at the equivalent of college in March 1982, in Australia.

        1. Agemegos

          To clarify, I start a bachelor’s degree in electrical engineering at the University of New South Wales. That’s called “university” or “uni” rather than “college”, because in our parlance “college” refers to what I think Americans call a “dorm” or “hall or residence”. I didn’t live in college until second semester.

          As for sports, I was in my high school swimming team, but played hockey and did surf lifesaving with clubs. When I got to uni sports were organised by clubs (each college had rugby, cricket, soccer etc. teams for the intramural comp) which were affiliated with the Sports Union, but the clubs and Sports Union were organised by members (mostly students) on an amateur basis: the universities do not hire coaches, nor give “scholarships” to fake-amateur “student”-athletes.

        2. Roborat

          Wait, you played hockey in Australia? I thought the only ice you guys had was in your drinks.

        3. Agemegos

          Field hockey, not ice hockey. But we also have indoor ice rinks and snowfields larger than the whole of Switzerland.

        4. Agemegos

        5. Roborat

          Ah, yea, I guess that would make more sense. As a Canadian, when I hear hockey, I assume it is the version played on skates.

        6. cbwroses

          I was born in 81 in America. So it may in fact be a generational thing, a cultural thing, or both.

  32. Eldritch Gentleman

    Heh this reminds me how one professor at my college explained to us that English speakers understand Friend differently to Przyjaciel, which is my language’s equivalent of that. To them everyone who they know even a bit are Friends while in my language Przyjaciel is someone you actually have a pretty strong bond. All in all Friend should be probably translated as Kolega…

    1. Tenzhi

      As a native English speaker myself, my friends are essentially extended family. Indeed, they are more important to me than many of my blood relatives. People I just casually know are merely acquaintances.

      1. Eldritch Gentleman

        “Blood of covenant is thicker than the water of the womb” huh?

        1. cbwroses

          Eh. I consider friends anyone I voluntarily and repeatedly hang with outside of the setting I met them. No matter how close we were in one setting, if we didn’t try to spend time in another setting, we weren’t friends, just friendly.

    2. Agemegos

      “Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried,
      Grapple them to thy soul with hoops of steel;
      But do not dull thy palm with entertainment
      Of each new-hatch’d, unfledg’d comrade.”

  33. NaYa

    Um… Walky doesn’t know it’s his sister that Jason ‘plowed,’ does he.

    1. Reltzik

      Nope. And he won’t handle it well when he finds out.

      …. granted, I’ve got no idea in what WAY he won’t handle it well, there’s like a zillion bad options, but it’s Walky. He’s going to go with a bad option.

  34. Emily

    Walky you are a font of toxic masculinity.

    1. Delicious Taffy

      Walky is the Bradley Hand ITC of toxic masculinity.

  35. nightshade

    you all realize all this is a set up for walky to find out it was his sister the ta’s was bangin right ?

  36. djhash

    Walk(y?)ism (on being dudes): “Our friends are just who we grunt at in the hallway”. Someone could probably make a Walkyism calendar out of the things he says!

    1. djhash

      On dude friendship:
      “Our friends are just who we grunt at in the hallway”

      “Wonder if I can get extra credit for that”

      “Sir Chad Wellington Chimney Sweep IV”

      “The pause was a lie”

      On time standing still..
      “‘Cept it doesn’t”

  37. mra

    Walky is a bizarre character, he dated the most feminist character in the series and expressed no issue with the fact that she was defying old fashioned gender roles in her ambition (and even showed support) and yet is so insecure about not fitting into a masculine image that he won’t buy a spare set of shoes or make close friends out of fear of being to in touch with his feminine side.

  38. abysswatcher1993

    Jason should keep to himself who he plowed. Also, considering Walky only hangs out with girls, and his only male friends acquaintances are Joe and Mike… Walky isn’t a good example of making friends with other men. All his inverse bechdel tests involve chicken nuggets.

  39. nlips

    I must admit that, as a fairly antisocial dude, I was slow to realize the importance and value of having actual friends instead of random acquaintances.

  40. Guest42

    I honestly don’t think Walky’s too far off. If it seems that way you have to realize he has a generally instantly friendly personality. He might grow out of that, unfortunately.

  41. H3xx

    He’s not wrong.

  42. Heavensrun

    Hey, it’s Blanka!

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