Hank would stand by his own, but she’s reluctant to come downstairs to see him.
DudeMyDadOwnsaDealership
And God’s Avatar of Divine Fatherhood in His Own Mind is conveniently too dead to ever have to return the favor after all the supposed excuses Carol has made for him all these years, so there’s no way to prove he wouldn’t just continue to play along and take take take like always.
A life devoted to being an enabler rarely ends well, and I thank Hank has just realized that applies to both him and Carol. John wasn’t worth it. Jordan wasn’t worth it. “Josh” wasn’t worth it. Bonnie wasn’t worth it. Becky wasn’t worth it. Joyce now seems to have lost desire to be worth it. But that insincere sponge Ross is worth everyone throwing themselves under a bus?!
Probably honest to God believed he was devoting he best years of his life to a bunch to would stand by their own beyond this human prawn-version of hardcore crew-gangbangery, too.
Helps if you see it as a precautionary tale….Can and does happen to any of us.
someone from her specific shitty church died. that means they all (everyone else) won, because anyone not in her shitty church is actively against it in her eyes
This is what happened when you not only build your entire religion around a savior who is a martyr, but also build your entire current culture around being martyrs, even when you are not actually being persecuted at all.
Lumino
Come on, now, let’s not blame her shitbaggery on Christ. If people at her church saw Historical Jesus from Shortpacked they’d crucify him again.
The ‘also’ is important in my assessment. It isn’t about Christ, it’s about certain sects keying in on only the martyrdom aspect and building their entire ethos around that while ignoring everything else he is supposed to have taught.
Geneseepaws
Ignoring the poor, the hungry, Yada yada, it so bad for society as a whole, if one religion focuses on death instead of focusing on life.
thejeff
Yeah, it’s not really blaming Christ, but just one of the ways people interpret the message. It’s a pretty striking one though, at least in modern times. There’s a huge emphasis on Christians being persecuted for their faith today in parts of the world where Christianity is overwhelmingly dominant that doesn’t really make sense without some deeper motivation.
It’s not ubiquitous though. Catholicism, for example, puts a lot of emphasis on martyred saints and the like, but I don’t think it had the same kind of “you will be persecuted for your faith” concept throughout most of its history.
Captain Oblivious
Maybe it’s because they already did that to found their faith, and have actually been persecuted since then too (various times/conflicts), so they do not feel the need to make up bs persecution stories today, to validate themselves with their identity.
thejeff
But all of Christianity descends from that same persecutions at the founding and Protestants were persecuted after splitting from the dominant Catholic Church as well.
C.T Phipps
I feel that’s a weird way of saying. “I support my crappy neighbor because I’m a vicious homophobe and hate that he failed.”
The belief that all evil stems from a single source is actually pretty common among conservative Christians–there’s even a Chick Tract that displays the Devil as a hydra, with heads all labeled different ‘evils’ including Communism, Homosexuality, Paganism, Islam and Atheism. Basically, anyone who is not in their particular sect of Christianity is part of the singular ‘you’ against whom they struggle.
Cabbage Jack
Don’t forget Catholics! Jack Chick sure hated those cats!
Maybe it doesn’t have to be, but it is. If Toedad had his way and Becky got kidnapped to be “straightened out,” then we’d definitely say that she “lost,” ergo, that not happening means the kids won. Of course, Linda isn’t really on Team Joyce and Co, so saying “You won” probably lines up more with Axel’s comment.
Like, it paints a weird version of the story where Linda and the rest of the world are in some fight against him rather than one of Linda’s family having been the victim of unprovoked violence from the guy.
Nicely done, Hank!
Also, holy crap that logic there – “If you listen to the adults, then you don’t get hurt!” has to be right up there with “If you had my dinner cooked, I wouldn’t have had to hit you!” in terms of excusing and minimizing abusive behaviors.
Why would Christians listen to that brown fella in sandals?
StClair
Don’t forget the blue sash. Kind of important.
a/snow/mous/e
Never forget the blue sash 😛
a/snow/mous/e
(I believe that’s a Shortpacked! reference?)
Aro
For some reason 99.9% of all artist’s renderings of Jesus have him wearing a blue sash.
3oranges
Why not? They made blue from dead snails!
ktbear
The one who said love your neighbour, whose father dictated an entirely ambiguous book that suggests gays and lesbians are going to go straight to hell, at least in some interpretations?
Rose by Any Other Name
Oh oh!
I recently read that the anti-gay stuff is actually a mistranslated of some anti-pedophilia stuff. As in “a man should not lay with a young boy”.
That said, I read this on the internet, so grain of salt at best, but still, if it’s true, that’s a pretty major fuck-up on someone’s part.
King Daniel
I remember one of my older sisters bringing the same thing up once in an in-person convo years back (she also mentioned, IIRC, how in the case of the Roman centurion who had that “male servant” that Jesus healed long-distance, said “servant” was actually the centurion’s lover).
JohnInCA
Eh.
It’s arguable.
But years ago I realized it doesn’t actually matter. Religion is more then the holy text (even if they claim it’s super-important), it’s also the teachings, values and culture. And regardless of what the text may or may not have meant in the original Hebrew over 2000 years ago, the current common interpretation has held steady for centuries.
You’re not going to undermine that by going “um, actually…” and trying to argue that their interpretation of the text is wrong. You can undermine it other ways, and they may eventually come around to the whole “their interpretation fo the text is wrong” bit, but that will always, 100% of the time, be a post hoc rationalization of their changing beliefs, not the impetus of their changing beliefs.
Rose by Any Other Name
That’s fair. Still, as a non-Christian looking in, it’s interesting to see how some of these things might have worked.
Also, on that same point, I’ve also encountered a lot of modern churches that have simply chosen to be better. I think I’ve mentioned this before, but years ago, I dated both a Jewish lesbian and a Catholic lesbian* (years apart, not at the same time) both of whom came from denominations of their respective religion that fully embraced and accepted LGBT+ individuals. When I got introduced around, I got the “so when you two gonna get married?” shtick rather than any hate.
So yeah, I get what you mean about the text being less important than people just choosing to be better. And it’s super nice when it happens. ^^
* Technically she was bisexual, not lesbian, but the sentence flow and grammar worked better using lesbian. This note included for accuracy.
thejeff
Pretty much. Despite all the theological arguments and Bible passage quoting, huge amounts of Christian belief aren’t particularly sourced in the Bible’s text.
BarerMender
I’ve read that the quotation in Hebrew reads, “You shall not have the lyings of a man in the lyings of a woman.” Now you tell me what that means.
Reltzik
… women aren’t supposed to lie about a man lying?
David
Anal is reserved for males. Or “no strapons”.
Azhrei Vep
I’ll go with Hellsing Ultimate Abridged’s interpretation: “So as long as I don’t fuck a man in the vagina, it’s fine.”
Vukodlak
That the old testament only condemns homosexuality between
men and not between women.
Freemage
There’s even a passage in one of the later books that says that God created lesbians to punish men for being unpious. So you go, girls–you’re doing the Lord’s work!
a/snow/mous/e
Men should not lie with women.
A bold stance against heterosexuality.
a/snow/mous/e
oh my god could you imagine a CHURCH OF THE GAYS
heterophobia
all love must be queer
Droewyn
I hope they don’t take a stance against in vitro fertilization, otherwise they’ll be a short-lived sect.
Knuf Wons
Were you not aware that gay is immortal?
CJ
The problem is that the text, whichever version, is taken to be the god‘s one god’s true word without any individual and cultural bias in it.
As if, if god is all encompassing and so much greater than humans, any human would be able to understand all of it.
Hu, the text box is cut off. If the sentences have double words, that’s the reason.
Kyle Voltti
Blessed are the cheese makers
Joe Covenant
Well, yes, but obviously thats not meant to be taken literally – it refers to ANY manufacturers of dairy products.
Discussion (561) - “Won”
Ana Chronistic
“This is not an airport, you don’t have to announce your departure”
deathjavu
You do if it’s intended to be a passive-aggressive wordplay-based dunk on your evil wife!
WikiDreamer
*golf clap*
Needfuldoer
Hank would stand by his own, but she’s reluctant to come downstairs to see him.
DudeMyDadOwnsaDealership
And God’s Avatar of Divine Fatherhood in His Own Mind is conveniently too dead to ever have to return the favor after all the supposed excuses Carol has made for him all these years, so there’s no way to prove he wouldn’t just continue to play along and take take take like always.
A life devoted to being an enabler rarely ends well, and I thank Hank has just realized that applies to both him and Carol. John wasn’t worth it. Jordan wasn’t worth it. “Josh” wasn’t worth it. Bonnie wasn’t worth it. Becky wasn’t worth it. Joyce now seems to have lost desire to be worth it. But that insincere sponge Ross is worth everyone throwing themselves under a bus?!
Probably honest to God believed he was devoting he best years of his life to a bunch to would stand by their own beyond this human prawn-version of hardcore crew-gangbangery, too.
Helps if you see it as a precautionary tale….Can and does happen to any of us.
Rose by Any Other Name
Mike drop.
… oh wait…
Nick
BAHAHAHAHAHA
I should feel bad about it but that made me laugh so much.
Brendan Louis
how dare…
https://wompampsupport.azureedge.net/fetchimage?siteId=7575&v=2&jpgQuality=100&width=700&url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.kym-cdn.com%2Fentries%2Ficons%2Ffacebook%2F000%2F026%2F618%2FZEBxqIA.jpg
Enkrod
https://media3.giphy.com/media/SuIDKboVhHgtLPG6zm/giphy.gif
Rose by Any Other Name
… I’m too scared to check the links. Has anyone else braved them?
Jason Rivest
I have. Nothing to be scared about. Tom from Tom & Jerry, and the Greta Thunberg at the UN.
Tan
They are just meme reply images to express outrage. They are neither NSFW nor mentally/emotionally scarring.
a/snow/mous/e
Speak for yourself! That cat is an attempted mouse killer! D:
Tan
https://i.redd.it/tya8ycddg2t21.jpg
JasonAW3
Too late!!! He already did!
Foxhack
“You won.”
This… isn’t about winning.
Axel
someone from her specific shitty church died. that means they all (everyone else) won, because anyone not in her shitty church is actively against it in her eyes
Axel
actively meaning they care about and feel accomplishment at the death, other than ‘thank goodness he can’t get my kids again’
bubba0077
This is what happened when you not only build your entire religion around a savior who is a martyr, but also build your entire current culture around being martyrs, even when you are not actually being persecuted at all.
Lumino
Come on, now, let’s not blame her shitbaggery on Christ. If people at her church saw Historical Jesus from Shortpacked they’d crucify him again.
RacingTurtle
“oh no, not again”
Opus the Poet
That quote is from a bowl of petunias, not Historical Jesus.
MM
It can be two things.
SuperZero
I suspect it has been said more than once.
Ray Radlein
Oh no, not again
poofdepoof
I don’t know why I can’t reply directly to Ray Radlein’s joke but I just came here to say that I reaaaally like it.
SuperZero
Comments can only nest so far so that they don’t get squished too much. We’re at the limit, so there’s no “Reply” button on these comments.
Needfuldoer
This better?
“I died in the most painful and inhumane way trying to teach Judea how to get into the kingdom of Heaven, and this knowledge is mostly used to smuggle in some strange talking hedgehog.”
Captain Oblivious
https://media.tenor.com/images/f92b83dd895c8b2f2ea7040e67f87d39/tenor.png
bubba0077
The ‘also’ is important in my assessment. It isn’t about Christ, it’s about certain sects keying in on only the martyrdom aspect and building their entire ethos around that while ignoring everything else he is supposed to have taught.
Geneseepaws
Ignoring the poor, the hungry, Yada yada, it so bad for society as a whole, if one religion focuses on death instead of focusing on life.
thejeff
Yeah, it’s not really blaming Christ, but just one of the ways people interpret the message. It’s a pretty striking one though, at least in modern times. There’s a huge emphasis on Christians being persecuted for their faith today in parts of the world where Christianity is overwhelmingly dominant that doesn’t really make sense without some deeper motivation.
It’s not ubiquitous though. Catholicism, for example, puts a lot of emphasis on martyred saints and the like, but I don’t think it had the same kind of “you will be persecuted for your faith” concept throughout most of its history.
Captain Oblivious
Maybe it’s because they already did that to found their faith, and have actually been persecuted since then too (various times/conflicts), so they do not feel the need to make up bs persecution stories today, to validate themselves with their identity.
thejeff
But all of Christianity descends from that same persecutions at the founding and Protestants were persecuted after splitting from the dominant Catholic Church as well.
C.T Phipps
I feel that’s a weird way of saying. “I support my crappy neighbor because I’m a vicious homophobe and hate that he failed.”
Freemage
The belief that all evil stems from a single source is actually pretty common among conservative Christians–there’s even a Chick Tract that displays the Devil as a hydra, with heads all labeled different ‘evils’ including Communism, Homosexuality, Paganism, Islam and Atheism. Basically, anyone who is not in their particular sect of Christianity is part of the singular ‘you’ against whom they struggle.
Cabbage Jack
Don’t forget Catholics! Jack Chick sure hated those cats!
Slartibeast Button, BIA
For some people, everything is about winning.
clif
For others, it’s about everyone else losing.
BarerMender
Amen
Shariku
And for some, in a weird messed up way, everything is about losing, and making sure everyone knows that you’re the victim.
Allandrel
Oh, so you’ve met my mother?
David
For others, everything is about whining. And yet for others, about winnying.
Meagan
Maybe it doesn’t have to be, but it is. If Toedad had his way and Becky got kidnapped to be “straightened out,” then we’d definitely say that she “lost,” ergo, that not happening means the kids won. Of course, Linda isn’t really on Team Joyce and Co, so saying “You won” probably lines up more with Axel’s comment.
Nah
Like, it paints a weird version of the story where Linda and the rest of the world are in some fight against him rather than one of Linda’s family having been the victim of unprovoked violence from the guy.
Captain Oblivious
Exactly. You have to be insane to try telling someone that they won, after their child was kidnapped. Like, couch jumping nuts.
But there’s the rub, “you’ve gotta be nuts, to argue with crazy people.”
Stu
Nicely done, Hank!
Also, holy crap that logic there – “If you listen to the adults, then you don’t get hurt!” has to be right up there with “If you had my dinner cooked, I wouldn’t have had to hit you!” in terms of excusing and minimizing abusive behaviors.
Mra
Which Adult was Ross supposed to listen to? I’m guessing it wasn’t any of the ones he did, or else he wouldn’t be dead,
abacuswizard
“Which Adult was Ross supposed to listen to?”
Maybe the one who told him to love his neighbor?
Foxhack
Why would Christians listen to that brown fella in sandals?
StClair
Don’t forget the blue sash. Kind of important.
a/snow/mous/e
Never forget the blue sash 😛
a/snow/mous/e
(I believe that’s a Shortpacked! reference?)
Aro
For some reason 99.9% of all artist’s renderings of Jesus have him wearing a blue sash.
3oranges
Why not? They made blue from dead snails!
ktbear
The one who said love your neighbour, whose father dictated an entirely ambiguous book that suggests gays and lesbians are going to go straight to hell, at least in some interpretations?
Rose by Any Other Name
Oh oh!
I recently read that the anti-gay stuff is actually a mistranslated of some anti-pedophilia stuff. As in “a man should not lay with a young boy”.
That said, I read this on the internet, so grain of salt at best, but still, if it’s true, that’s a pretty major fuck-up on someone’s part.
King Daniel
I remember one of my older sisters bringing the same thing up once in an in-person convo years back (she also mentioned, IIRC, how in the case of the Roman centurion who had that “male servant” that Jesus healed long-distance, said “servant” was actually the centurion’s lover).
JohnInCA
Eh.
It’s arguable.
But years ago I realized it doesn’t actually matter. Religion is more then the holy text (even if they claim it’s super-important), it’s also the teachings, values and culture. And regardless of what the text may or may not have meant in the original Hebrew over 2000 years ago, the current common interpretation has held steady for centuries.
You’re not going to undermine that by going “um, actually…” and trying to argue that their interpretation of the text is wrong. You can undermine it other ways, and they may eventually come around to the whole “their interpretation fo the text is wrong” bit, but that will always, 100% of the time, be a post hoc rationalization of their changing beliefs, not the impetus of their changing beliefs.
Rose by Any Other Name
That’s fair. Still, as a non-Christian looking in, it’s interesting to see how some of these things might have worked.
Also, on that same point, I’ve also encountered a lot of modern churches that have simply chosen to be better. I think I’ve mentioned this before, but years ago, I dated both a Jewish lesbian and a Catholic lesbian* (years apart, not at the same time) both of whom came from denominations of their respective religion that fully embraced and accepted LGBT+ individuals. When I got introduced around, I got the “so when you two gonna get married?” shtick rather than any hate.
So yeah, I get what you mean about the text being less important than people just choosing to be better. And it’s super nice when it happens. ^^
* Technically she was bisexual, not lesbian, but the sentence flow and grammar worked better using lesbian. This note included for accuracy.
thejeff
Pretty much. Despite all the theological arguments and Bible passage quoting, huge amounts of Christian belief aren’t particularly sourced in the Bible’s text.
BarerMender
I’ve read that the quotation in Hebrew reads, “You shall not have the lyings of a man in the lyings of a woman.” Now you tell me what that means.
Reltzik
… women aren’t supposed to lie about a man lying?
David
Anal is reserved for males. Or “no strapons”.
Azhrei Vep
I’ll go with Hellsing Ultimate Abridged’s interpretation: “So as long as I don’t fuck a man in the vagina, it’s fine.”
Vukodlak
That the old testament only condemns homosexuality between
men and not between women.
Freemage
There’s even a passage in one of the later books that says that God created lesbians to punish men for being unpious. So you go, girls–you’re doing the Lord’s work!
a/snow/mous/e
Men should not lie with women.
A bold stance against heterosexuality.
a/snow/mous/e
oh my god could you imagine a CHURCH OF THE GAYS
heterophobia
all love must be queer
Droewyn
I hope they don’t take a stance against in vitro fertilization, otherwise they’ll be a short-lived sect.
Knuf Wons
Were you not aware that gay is immortal?
CJ
The problem is that the text, whichever version, is taken to be the god‘s one god’s true word without any individual and cultural bias in it.
As if, if god is all encompassing and so much greater than humans, any human would be able to understand all of it.
Hu, the text box is cut off. If the sentences have double words, that’s the reason.
Kyle Voltti
Blessed are the cheese makers
Joe Covenant
Well, yes, but obviously thats not meant to be taken literally – it refers to ANY manufacturers of dairy products.
James