117

Parental
Posted on July 14, 2020 by David M Willis

117 thoughts on “Parental”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    “eh, it’s three a’ Joyce, ah got this”

    1. RowenMorland

      “Three a’ Joyce and all is well!”

  2. King Daniel

    Hail to the Queen

  3. Hornet

    Seem the cult has a new Grand Goddess.
    I dunno who I’m more afraid for!

    1. NinjaNick

      Cult of S.A.L. (Super Awesome Lady).

  4. Doctor_Who

    Sal: Look, you’ve got it all wrong! You don’t need to follow me, you don’t need to follow anybody! You’ve got to think for yourselves! You’re all individuals!

    Quad Squad: Yes! We’re all individuals!

    Sal: You’re all different!

    Quad Squad: Yes, we are all different!

    Nash: …I’m not.

    Quad Squad: Shhh!

    1. BigDogLittleCat

      The shoe or the gourd?

    2. JetstreamGW

      “I have an individual point of view!” “I agree, I also have an individual point of view!” “And I agree with both of them!”

      “””WE ALL HAVE OUR OWN INDIVIDUAL POINT OF VIEW!”””

      1. StClair

        *claps, then leans in to whisper* beat ya by ten minutes. 😉

        1. JetstreamGW

          Look, I can’t be expected to search entire threads for obscure Garfield and Friends deep cuts, okay!?

          “Oh we are the buddy bears, we never ever fight!”

      2. Roborat

        I don’t

  5. Stephen Bierce

    –Leader of the PACK! *motorcycle rumble effects*

    1. vlademir1

      Damn… Now Dee Snider is in my head.

      1. Sunny

        You say that like it’s a bad thing?

  6. Mra

    I am just finding the girls in Billie’s dorm more and more shallow and annoying

    1. Mra

      Save for Lucy

      1. clif

        Sal meets Lucy. Sal and Malaya discover a common bond.

        1. DailyBrad

          Eh, she’d probably stomach Lucy easier than Malaya did, given she’s warmed up to Joyce. Of course, she likes Joyce a lot more now that she’s made an effort to be better about not propping her up on a pedestal.

  7. DrWattson

    Oh my god, it’s a floor full of Joyces. I should have noticed sooner.

    1. Michael Steamweed

      When the Whiteboard Dingdong Bandit plague strikes this floor, it will be epic.

  8. Sirksome

    You know I”m actually starting to feel bad for these girls. I know they’re the the most irrelevant of background characters but damn.. grow a sense of individuality and freedom.

    1. Hornet

      Aw, c’mon!
      I’m sure there’s WAY more irrelevant background characters in this comic!
      (Does DOA have a “Whitney McJority”?)

      1. Sirksome

        I guess technically they can’t be considered true “background characters” if they have named tags. But they are pretty irrelevent. I stand by that.

      2. Kamino Neko

        Pretty sure he worked for Robin. Back when she had a staff that was more than Becky.

    2. StClair

      “But what about having an individual point of view?”
      “I have an individual point of view.”
      “And I agree with him.”
      “And I agree with both of them.”
      “We all have an individual point of view!”

      1. Hornet

        Reminds me of the joke we had back in the 90s about the “Individuals of a Certain Subculture” who all walked, talked, dressed and acted alike whose motto seemed to be “I’m a nonconformist Loner — just like ALL my friends”!

        1. StClair

          let me guess, they all shopped at Hot Topic?
          “the-official-source-for-mass-produced-alternative-culture-at-a-mall-or-shopping-center-near-you”

        2. Needfuldoer

          Where all the preppy vampire kids shop? No actual non-conformists would ever shop at Hot Topic.

        3. Geneseepaws

          I was not one of those, but I noticed we all shopped at Teh Gapp, cause Counter Culture. Now it is all quartz and granite counter culture.

        4. Needfuldoer

          You’ve got to hit Lowes, Home Depot, Menard’s, or Grossmann’s for some real counter culture.

        5. Skeptible

          I too mocked those people (but not loudly enough for anyone to hear it) for being different in the same way, but in hindsight, I give them credit for opting out of the majority culture and don’t blame them for joining a different one.

  9. BigDogLittleCat

    Wow. Sal is so comfortable with her scar now. IIRC every other time she’s been defensive about it. Now, it’s just part of her past.

    1. DrWattson

      I’m sure at this point she just wears the glove because it’s part of the outfit.

  10. Hornet

    It just dawned on me that I don’t remember ever actually seeing Sal’s scar!
    Can any deep divers point me toward it, if it’s ever been shown?
    What I guess I’m asking is: is it just that big and gash-y, or is Sal semi-uncharacteristically being overly self-conscious over an “imperfection”/wound? I mean, it’s (physically) healed, right?

    1. BBCC

      https://www.dumbingofage.com/2018/comic/book-9-comic/01-flyin-to-the-red/knows/

      Fairly big (in proportion to her hand) and still a very angry red.

      Sal did mention to Danny she doesn’t have full use of her hand so.

    2. Regalli

      As BBCC said. Definitely big and noticeable (Joyce immediately notices and has questions when Sal doesn’t wear gloves the next day – incidentally, the strip after this one is GREAT Salness for this strip as well, https://www.dumbingofage.com/2018/comic/book-9-comic/02-but-the-sun-still-shines/endthings/) and also permanently disabling.

      Comments at the time speculated that, given the way the scar’s drawn, the lasting effects, and the ‘it was a big fucking knife stabbed STRAIGHT down,’ it probably did some serious damage to bones and tendons.

      1. Hornet

        Thanks, BBCC and Regalli!

      2. Marsh Maryrose

        And the one before it has one of those great Willis lines that I’m always forgetting until I remember them:

        “I hate your stupid grumpy face…I want to kiss it”

    3. Bicycle Bill

      Scars do take a while to fade.  I had my shoulder rebuilt after a bike crash in 2006 and the scar, although it healed well, was still pretty livid for about five years after and it was ten years or more before it finally faded enough that I could wear tank-tops without it being too noticeable.

  11. BBCC

    Yeaaaaahhhhh, no wonder Joyce seemed unpleasant to Sal when they first met.

  12. Yumi

    Oh, good.
    Them.

  13. General Tekno

    Hey, she’s opening up from the get go. Some character development right there.

  14. EvilMidnightLurker

    “Why Amber?”

    “It’s the only thing she can think of to do that would give her any control over the situation. There’s like a thousand better things she could do, and at least a hundred of them would also involve her having some control, but this is literally the only one she can think of.”

    1. Regalli

      ‘Mom’s imagination is sometimes very… single-track.’

  15. Sporky

    OMG. Is Sal going to meet Lucy?! PLEASE

    1. Alex Boston

      Seems only fair, since Malaya met Joyce.

  16. butts

    yeah me too

  17. Burpo

    Why do I imagine those 3 sounding like the Pizza Planet aliens from Toy Story?

    1. Bicycle Bill

      “the Scaaarrrrr…….”

  18. KSClaw

    Good grief, what’s with that weird mentality?

    1. Kernanator

      The world is full of people desperate for someone to put on a pedestal, regardless of their actual character.

    2. C.T Phipps

      Fan stands for fanatic. It’s not really all that uncommon.

      Who do you think posts all the, “I will kill the creators for having Spider-Man get married! He’s my boyfriend” are by.

      1. Delicious Taffy

        Look, you have your hobbies, I have mine.

        1. clif

          Everyone needs a hobby.

  19. Regalli

    I would actually love to see any sleeve tattoo Sal gets! (Though uh, that does seem like a very good way to put her in long sleeves again forever, depending on the complexity.)

  20. Axel

    they’re going to be so spoked when they find out she also knows asl

    1. Some1

      Nah, knowing asl, while an impressive accomplishment, is not typically viewed as traditionally “cool”. They aren’t looking for someone with real accomplishments or skills, they’re looking for someone who fits their very limited idea of what a popular person is like.

      1. Miri

        I think Axel was coming more from the “given that one of them is deaf/mute and uses it” angle 🙂 Otherwise people like Dorothy would have eager fans willing to follow her example and advice… Poor Dotty!

        1. Axel

          Yes. She is cool and also she can use asl, so she’s cool and able to communicate with everyone

        2. Needfuldoer

          Beatrice is Deaf and uses ASL, but what residual hearing she has (if any) is yet to be confirmed. We do know she isn’t mute, and has spoken numerous times on-panel.

          https://www.dumbingofage.com/2017/comic/book-8/01-face-the-strange/stereotypically/

        3. Axel

          I might be misremembering, I thought there were scenes where people were actively translating for her (although even then, she could be able to hear some frequencies/volumes but not others, so you’re right anyway)

        4. Needfuldoer

          No, you’re right. We’ve seen Nash signing for her before.

          https://www.dumbingofage.com/2017/comic/book-8/01-face-the-strange/legends/

    2. Axel

      *stoked, not spoked or spooked

    3. Geneseepaws

      I just noticed Sal is ASL spelled sideways. Ugh, I need more coffee.

  21. Erica

    I really hate this dorm

    1. Puckish Rogue

      Hate is a strong word (you’re not wrong though)

  22. C.T Phipps

    I want Billie to fist fight Sal, defeat her, and regain control of her kingdom.

    I think the Girl Posse really made Billie as a character.

    We need them to return to their master!

  23. Derek

    Oh yay, it’s the dorm of pod people, my favourite (sarcastically)

  24. Sirksome

    Just sayin this. Maybe Amber deserves to be kicked out of school. Not for stabbing Sal, or stabbing Ryan, or operating as a vigilante, or being related to a guy who kidnapped students and killed a man. No. She deserves to be kicked out for hacking into the school computers and manipulating Walky’s grades that one time! Even going so far as to scale the side of a building (which was probably way extra) to steal the hard copy! That’s major grounds for expulsion and the biggest academic crime Amber has ever committed probably. So uhhh take that Amber!

    1. Delicious Taffy

      On the other hand, it’s the grades for a freshman’s first quarter. They matter about as much as anything anyone has ever done in high school.

      1. Regalli

        Academic integrity policies do not give a shit, and the fact that she’d do so AT ALL is absolutely a thing she’d get expelled over. (I know someone who got a dropped letter grade and had to go before the appropriate council for accidentally forgetting to cite something in a submitted rough draft. Like, a very minor and legitimately accidental thing, as said conduct council decided! Still got a letter grade drop on the whole assignment. Academic integrity policies go HARD.)

        It’s an INCREDIBLY bad move. For that matter, her stalking Sal? Was totally a thing worthy of all that Lindaing. The issue is that what Linda is Lindaing over is the ‘related to a guy who kidnapped my son, oh and also her I guess’.

        1. Regalli

          May have been the class even, I don’t remember.

        2. Chris Phoenix

          Depends on the school. My ex-wife used to teach at Miami Dade College. She was not allowed to flunk students for blatant plagiarism (like google a phrase and find a paragraph verbatim). The administration pointed out that she hadn’t made them sign a paper saying they wouldn’t plagiarize.

          So, next class, she made them sign it. Some of them still plagiarized. She still wasn’t allowed to flunk them. She quit.

          Her students were future teachers.

        3. ischemgeek

          A uni I used to work at as a TA technically would let you flunk a student for cheating… But they could take it to the Dean and then appeal to the disciplinary committee and onus was on the prof to prove the student intended to cheat and knew it was wrong and the whole process would take MONTHS at a school where most profs had 3-4 courses plus a research program to manage every semester so most profs didn’t bother.

          Most of my students were aspiring engineers, scientists and pre-med students.

        4. temperaryobsessor

          Yea that does seem harsh for a rough draft, on the other hand the consequences appear to have been localized to the paper in the end.

    2. Needfuldoer

      Not sure what the likelihood of her getting caught for that is, though. She didn’t do something as blatant as giving him straight As, and she edited Jason’s records (which would be scrutinized if he confesses to having a relationship with a student in one of his classes).

      There’s definitely another shoe waiting to drop, though.

  25. abysswatcher1993

    People that can’t choose for themselves are annoying. It’s like giving away your freewill to some demiurge at the bottom of Mementos, or becomming the slave of a giant golden head.

    1. clif

      You don’t believe people should be able to choose for themselves whether to choose for themselves?

      That seems … odd.

      1. Psychie

        I don’t believe they made any prescriptive statements, they didn’t say what they think people should or shouldn’t do, they made a statement about their personal emotional reaction to the behaviors of others.

        I personally get annoyed by people who drink/smoke/do drugs, but I am firmly of the opinion that recreational substances should be legalized, regulated, and taxed. Just because I wouldn’t do something and might think someone is an idiot for doing it, doesn’t mean I don’t fully support their right to stupidity.

        1. clif

          Good point.

      2. DSL

        Choosing to not choose? Seems rather slap-stick-ick.

    2. Eldritchy

      I’m getting Life of Brian flashbacks. For one thing Sal’s mother already believes that she is a very naughty girl.

  26. Bicycle Bill

    It’s not just a spider, Sal, it’s a tarantugun, and you should have called it that.  I know you think that THEY don’t know that, but sometimes you’d be surprised to find out who-all is in the fandom.

    And if nothing else, you get to introduce them to it.  That’s how my former girlfriend got me turned on to Terry Pratchett and the Discworld.

    1. showler

      Is it though? I thought DW mentioned at some point that the Tarantuguns are not part of Dexter and Monkey Master and that Sal’s spider design was the way to incorporate them into this world.

      1. Sombrero

        Wait until she completes the tatoo with a Martian:

        “Yeah, uh, it’s an eagle… ah guess”

  27. Newllend(henryvolt)

    Sal: Ah wish there was an of button to this but there ain’t.

  28. clif

    QED. All days are Tuesday.

  29. clif

    You can say that again.

  30. SalleighG

    https://www.dumbingofage.com/2018/comic/book-9-comic/01-flyin-to-the-red/fwap/ has a better look at the tattoo

  31. BenRG

    Forrest Hall – Where strange people are always looking for the next powerful personality upon whom to fixate! I wonder if Sal really is ready to handle a dorm full of ultra-Joyces but without her sweetness and charm?

    1. Eldritchy

      Unlike Billie she can actually escape… on her motorcycle… which will only make her more desirable to them.

  32. Reltzik

    Why does every part of this sequence feel inevitable?

    1. clif

      Personally, I blame Willis.

  33. Yotomoe

    Hot.

  34. FacelessDeviant

    She already does ,girls. She already does.

    That sentence looks weird.

    1. Needfuldoer

      It demonstrates the importance of punctuation.

      Sort of like “let’s eat, Frank” vs “let’s eat Frank”.

      1. AGV

        I, for one, I’m down on getting some Frank

        1. clif

          As Frank will be happy to learn.

      2. ValdVin

        Pardon? Impossible!

        No, money down!

        (Wait, I’ll come in again.)

    2. Kamino Neko

      Well, for one thing, the comma’s on the wrong side of the space.

      1. Bicycle Bill

        That is the perfect avatar for when one is being pedantic.

  35. Rabisch

    So. Billie is the only one able to save Amber? I’m scared!

    1. Geneseepaws

      Ahhhhh, the sheer Power of a college newspaper’s journalism.
      Wait, how’s Billie going to help Amber?

      1. JessWitt

        She will publish an opinion piece defending Amber’s right to stay?

        1. clif

          She will replace Linda with a mindless zombie under her complete control.

        2. Geneseepaws

          Will her journalistic skills reveal why Linda thinks Amber Framed Sal? Why else hate Amber so? Sal was robbing the place.
          I just don’t buy it, that Linda blames Amber and then sends Sal away for half a decade?? WTF?

  36. JessWitt

    Been a while since we’ve seen Billie versus Sal in the popularity rounds.

    As usual, TKO by Sal! It’s practically effortless! *ding ding*

  37. JBento

    Ah, the pod people return.

  38. hof1991

    So weird. These first semester college students behave a lot like high school students. Its like they haven’t aged much during the last decade the comic has been running.

  39. BenRG

    I suspect that Amber will have to ‘come out’ as Amazi-Girl at some point in this arc.

    I’m still thinking that Robin will be the key figure in this. She’ll make a statement about Becky’s near-kidnapping n which she cites Amber and Sal as ‘true American heroes’. Suddenly, they’ll be untouchable and Sal will need to have a shower after her mother tries to pretend that she values her.

    Amber’s sudden political capital will persuade the police to say they will look the other way so long as there is no more beating up delinquents (except in the defence of herself and her friends but even then not in costume). Being outperformed by a self-trained vigilante is bad for the professional mystique, after all.

  40. bcb

    I forgot who Beatrice was before this page.

  41. Heavensrun

    “Been thinkin’ a sleeve, but then the artist’ll have ta draw it, so ah’ll just end up wearin’ mah jacket ev’rwhere…”

    1. Mydnyt

      “Ah’ll even be forced to keep it on for the slipshines.”

      I… don’t see a problem with that…

  42. SalleighG

    mods: I accidentally left an unterminated href in the above seemingly empty comment. It seems to be affecting page loads of the comments. please delete it.

  43. Sombrero

    DoA Book 10: “So What Specific Parental Issue Are We Dealing With Today?”

  44. Amazi-Stool

    hovertext: “for me, it just was all days”

    OK, one of the best Tuesday jokes ever made!

  45. Bagge

    aaaaaalpha bong… sweet… just alpha.

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