107

Avenues
Posted on March 2, 2022 by David M Willis

107 thoughts on “Avenues”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    what is breakfast anyway but first dinner

    1. Clif

      Technically, first breakfast is last dinner.

      1. Harmony

        So…
        last dinner is the first breakfast & first dinner is breakfast

        So we can cancel out the words breakfast, dinner, is, and first…

        last the

        This sounds like “lasting”

        Therefore, all meals are lasting. As there’s no variable, that means lasting() going with default value, which with timing functions typically translates to a not-ending state.

        Therefore, Meal™ never ends.

        1. Librain

          ThE eTeRnAl FeAsT!

    2. someone

      Breakfast is literally when you’re breaking your fast, i.e., eating again after not having eaten for a while.

      1. Paradox

        I fasted for 12 minutes, now I’m having breakfast

    3. Azrael

      After 25+ years of working grave all meals are dinner.

  2. ThunderNight

    psycho-cereal

    1. True Survivor

      Also known as a cereal killer.

      1. Decidedly Orthogonal

        Hack the planet!

    2. Johnny

      c’est que c’est
      Fafafafa fafafafa fa fa better
      Run run runnn run run run awayyyyy

  3. Doctor_Who

    Plot twist: Becky succeeds in turning on when she buys one of these.

    1. Doctor_Who

      Turning DINA on. I accidentally a word.

      1. Clif

        I too many words.

      2. Amós Batista

        Too late. Now I imagine Becky being the furry one.

    2. Paradoxius

      Dina just needs a Grinch costume to match.

      1. brute

        ah, a person of culture

  4. King Daniel

    What about second breakfast?

    1. True Survivor

      Don’t forget Elevenses, super, dinner. You know about them don’t ya?

      1. Jon

        Super dinner is my favorite meal!

        1. PirateTawnee

          Does a regular dinner with Super Friends count? I feel like it should.

        2. King Daniel

          Would that make them Supper Friends

        3. Devious Smile

          sooo if you love Supper Dinner.
          Does that make you a…. Sinner? eh? eh?
          *hides before incoming tomatoes*

  5. True Survivor

    Oh my gosh, Dina does that thing where she sticks her tongue out while thinking. I’ve met anyone other than myself and my grandfather that does/did that.

    1. The Wellerman

      I know for SURE Joyce does that too. In fact, I am almost certain that exact part of her face was recycled from Joyce in Photoshop.

    2. Nono

      It’s a pretty common habit to have! Your brain subconsciously does it to limit the number of extra activities your body is doing so it can focus on the task at hand.

      Though that can vary; I stick my tongue out while thinking, but I also pace. It’s weird.

      1. The Wellerman

        Hmmm…. fascinating fact. Earthling, I must investigate further.

        Sauce?

      2. Sara Hysaro

        Pacing is a BIG one for me. I don’t stick my tongue out, but I’m always pacing. Any time I get a thought to explore I just get up to wander around, and sometimes after DnD sessions I have just so much excess energy I need to go for a walk (dunno if that’s exactly related, though).

    3. Rose by Any Other Name

      I know, right?

      … Dina has never been hotter then that moment.

      Damn you, Dina, and your scientific excellence! Rather than Becky, it is I who you have caught in your web of seduction!

    4. Chasey

      I used to do it but I made myself stop because my tongue would always be out front instead of to the side and my lord, it just me look like a moron, haha.

  6. The Wellerman

    Great thinking Dina!!!

    This epic scientific expedition continues!!!

    ??? ??

    *plays “World of Adventurers” on Hacked Muzak*

  7. Sirksome

    I mean eating cereal might as well be sex sometimes. Cereal is pretty good.

    1. The Wellerman

      Yeah!!! Imma eating some right now actually!!! ???

      I don’t care what people say. Crispex and Cheerios are pretty good without milk.

      1. Opus the Poet

        Cheerios is a recommended finger food for babies and toddlers, so yeah.

    2. Reltzik

      The two are not necessarily mutually exclusive.

    3. Victor

      Y’all are nuts. I’ve had sushi that I could compare to sex with a straight face. I’ve had a Thai curry that was nearly there. I even had lasagna (at a little sidewalk cafe in Rome) that might be considered comparable.
      But cereal? The ‘food’ that was literally developed to discourage masturbation because it was so bland?

      1. Deanatay

        I think you’re thinking about Corn Flakes. If you think all cereals are that bland, you need to try more cereals. Anything with chocolate, for example. And Raisin Bran always gives me a woodie.

        (You know, because it’s POST)

      2. Delicious Taffy

        I really have to wonder what the fuck was going through people’s heads in Ye Olden Dayes. Eating corn flakes makes kids not wanna whack it? First off, how? I want an explanation more reasonable than “the octopus that lives in my brain told me so”. Second off, why are you so worried about kids’ genital state, sir? Somethin’ you wanna tellogg, Mr. Kellogg? Why don’t you have a seat over there? Don’t worry about the cameras, Mr. Kellogg, they’re just for posterity.

    4. zee

      Cereal is mid. Milk makes it worse

  8. Kyrik Michalowski

    The fact that Dina has taken the time to create a list and create notes is simultaneously sweet/weird. Although, I can’t deny it is effective and methodical, so it is just like Dina.

    1. Nono

      Dina and Dorothy both do it, therefore the only thing left to do is a spreadsheet-off.

      1. Reltzik

        Joe also does it.

        …..

        …. I wanna add a smarmy follow-up to that, but I’m drawing a blank.

    2. PirateTawnee

      “The only difference between screwing around and science is writing it down.”

      1. Devin

        And I believe Becky is very much against screwing around right now.

  9. Nono

    So, sexiest (and least sexy) cereal?

    I think Frosties is probably up there.

    1. Kyrik Michalowski

      I don’t know if they are the sexiest, but I do love me some Cookie Crisp or Reese’s breakfast cereal.

      1. Kyrik Michalowski

        Now i want cereal and it is almost midnight, I don’t have my favorites but I do have trix, and that’s good enough.

    2. Anon A Mouse

      I’d say Chex for it’s blandness, and yet Chex MIX can potentially spice up any situation.

      1. Clif

        Chex mix goes surprisingly well with garlic.

        1. Andy

          Considering garlic powder is one of the ingredients, I can’t say that’s really surprising/

    3. Proxiehunter

      Cornflakes were literally invented to be un-sexy.

      1. Kyrik Michalowski

        You make an excellent point, and they do get soggy pretty quickly.

        1. Ray Radlein

          Man, soggies don’t rule

        2. Geneseepaws

          Since cheerios sog so very easily, I have to mix in some Honey-Almond-Flax Crunch Kashi so that there is some texture that doesn’t vanish as soon as the water or milk or what have you hits the bowl.

        3. Azhrei Vep

          But that’s the best feature of Cheerios! Why would you want to ruin it like that?

      2. Nono

        Does muesli/oatmeal count as cereal? Because I’d put them on the bottom.

        1. Reltzik

          Do you mean that you’d put that on your partner who is a bottom, or do you mean on your partner’s bottom?

        2. King Daniel

          You take that back about muesli right this inst–

          …wait, does being grey-ace mean you’re right about muesli being unsexy?? asking for a friend here

        3. Needfuldoer

          Oatmeal is cheap and good for you (if your digestive system can process gluten).

        4. The Wellerman

          I think there’s a gluten free version, actually.

        5. Needfuldoer

          Good! No excuses to not start the day with a steamin’ bowl of oatmeal!

        6. Needfuldoer

          Fack.

          https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=aVIewv1K3CA

        7. zee

          The texture is a hate crime

        8. Arian

          Muesli is my favourite cereal! And porridge (that’s what oatmeal is, right?) is my next-favourite!

          I don’t actually think *any* cereal is sexy, but muesli and porridge are tastiest, and not any *less* sexy than anything else. I steadfastly defend their reputation.

          Cornflakes are the least sexy. Instasludge. Ugh.

    4. Thag Simmons

      Kellogg rolling in his grave.

    5. Ophidiophile

      Froot Loops. Has a bird on the box. And birds are dinosaurs.

      1. Deanatay

        So does Cocoa Puffs. And, chocolate is ALWAYS sexier.

        1. Needfuldoer

          Those don’t even taste chocolate-y anymore.

        2. Delicious Taffy

          They didn’t taste chocolatey 25 years ago, either. I wonder if they ever have.

    6. Deanatay

      Sure, I’ll recycle my joke from above:

      Raisin Bran gives me a woodie. Because it’s POST!

      (Don’t talk to me about that Kellogg’s stuff. Soggies can have it.)

    7. Keulen

      I don’t know if cereal can be sexy, but I find any cereals that don’t have at least some sugar in them way too bland.

    8. Jamie

      I love that everyone thinks of cereal as boxes of brand names. Hypercapitalist colonization of the mind for the win.

  10. BBCC

    Excellent – science is done best on a full stomach.

    1. Kyrik Michalowski

      Shopping is also best done on a full stomach, lest you fall prey to impulse buying all the candy and snacks.

    2. Reltzik

      So THAT’S what was so messed up with these experiments.

      (CW: … look, I don’t know what to label it as, but it’s messed up.)

  11. Florence

    As I said a week ago, Dina is so good and Becky is lucky to have her, especially with helping her to recognise what the specific problems she has are and vocalise them.

    I especially love that Dina is so causally cool about sex. I was worried that by making her asexual she would be another autistic character in fiction that would be infantilised and at best be confused by sex but instead she’s comfortable and exploring all parts with no hesitation. It’s really nice to see an autistic who isn’t running away from adult things.

    If you’re reading this David’s Willis, thank you for this character turn, this autistic appreciates it ?

    1. karishi

      I had a similar response, especially with the way she was still smiling in the last panel of last comic; Having the sexytimes experiment rolled back wasn’t a failure or a rejection, it was a piece of useful information and making sure her partner was comfortable.
      And her interest in clarity is…INCREDIBLY USEFUL in a burgeoning relationship, especially one looking into sexytimes.

      1. Florence

        It’s so nice to see as an autistic, and yes her interest in clarity is so good for this dynamic

    2. The Wellerman

      Yeah, what I really like she has unique, bright, powerful stripes that ALL kinds of neurodivergents can really relate to, and I’m one of them. ?

      Such marvelous brain power and passion in what she does. Next to Goku and Izuku Midoria, she’s like my favorite socially challenged hero. ?

    3. Keulen

      It’s definitely nice to see an autistic character who’s not treated as a child who can’t handle anything sexual.

    4. RedCat

      Well she IS a biology student.

  12. EpochFlame

    qc steve moment

    1. Decidedly Orthogonal

      Bros! Bros! Bros!

    2. Keulen

      I’m sure he’s eating cereal somewhere.

  13. Eldritchy

    It would be an absolute Power Move against Kellogg if she got horny from eating cereal.

    1. Inbar Fink

      Dina Saruyama: more powerful than God and also John Harvey Kellogg.

      1. Needfuldoer

        But can she defeat W. K. Kellogg, the guy who actually started the cereal company?

        1. TomHCinMI

          It was Michael W. Kellogg and a non-Kellogg partner who started the cereal company.
          There were lots of Kelloggs in Battle Creek.

        2. Needfuldoer

          [Citation needed]

          They count W. K. Kellogg as their founder, and apparently the corporate ancestry traces back to the company he founded to sell cereal at retail (instead of just to former clients/patients of the sanitarium).

          https://www.kelloggcompany.com/en_US/our-heritage.html

          If you want a really confusing name, look at all the “Hershey”-s in Pennsylvania.

  14. Sombrero

    What now? Back to the Zoomr of Murdr? A CerealHub video? You can discover it now at Patreon yadda yadda.

  15. Hydrohead

    I do miss being able to eat cereal whenever and simi-continuously.

  16. Deanatay

    Also DAMN IT BECKY EAT LUNCH WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND

    DON’T SKIP MEALS

    (sorry this may be a thing for me right now)

  17. Alan in DC

    Joe Rosenthal is coming out with his own cereal. It doesn’t Snap, it doesnt Crackle, and it doesn’t Pop.

    It just lays there and Bangs.

  18. J

    time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so.

  19. Rabisch

    Love Becky’s smile in the last panel ♡.

  20. Darkoneko

    Where did they come from and why are they not soggy

    1. Needfuldoer

      Because the soggies may not rule the Dumbiverse. Dina is just too powerful.

  21. Opus the Poet

    Well it looks like the DOA comment system doesn’t like the cut-and-paste emogis.

    1. Amós Batista

      Or laughs, like “hahaha”, or “lol”.
      But @Wellerman could post it. I don’t know…

    2. The Wellerman

      Yeah I can always do it just fine.

      Don’t use too many though?

      The bots on this site must be on some bad stuff… ?

  22. Amós Batista

    Living through loopholes inside a tough sexual abstinence faith is a living hell. I hope one day Becky will pass through all thess rules and hardship.

    Thanks for be the best girlfriend ever, Dina.

  23. Kyrik Michalowski

    Not many comments on this one. Clearly people left to go get cereal and forgot to come back,

    1. Delicious Taffy

      Nobody’s getting naked or being slightly morally ambiguous.

      1. 0kami

        Or implying grievous physical harm to themselves or others.

  24. Edward Rhodes

    “Time is an illusion! ‘Lunchtime’ doubly so!” Ford Prefect “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.”

  25. Bagge

    OK, but will Becky get a bowl?

  26. Katerly

    I love that little smile in the last panel.
    It’s just, “Damn, that’s what I love about you.”
    All wrapped up in a smile. Because of course Dina would consider that maybe, just maybe cereal might get some stuff going. But also, it’s lunchtime.

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