149

Booklet
Posted on October 5, 2014 by David M Willis

149 thoughts on “Booklet”

  1. An Average Loser

    Was it in Comic format?

    1. ShadowWing Tronix

      That WOULD bring new meaning to “graphic novel”, wouldn’t it?

    2. spriteless

      Walky read his own slipshine?

      1. Yotomoe

        Even I was confused after reading that, though.

      2. Aeron

        He’s broke, he only read the free preview.

        1. Rowen Morland

          Nah, it was a giveaway.

    3. Plasma Mongoose

      I like the way you think. 😀

    4. JA

      it has to be available for download somewhere!

  2. Jen Aside

    only one comment after a whole minute? you guys SLOW

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Or our connection is.

      1. Shadow12000

        Or there’s too many people trying to comment, thus making it slower.

  3. David Herbert

    I think Walky would have done better with an instructional cartoon.

    Dexter explains sex wasn’t as popular as the Constantine/Death condom instruction from DC years back.

    1. 3oranges

      DC stands for death condom? Yikes.

    2. Jen Aside

      so, Fritz the Cat?

    3. Doctor_Who

      The image of John Constantine awkwardly holding out a banana so the grim frigging reaper can put a condom on it is still one of my favorite things of all time.

      1. Romanticide

        Is a glorious thing and I am glad it exists.

        1. Arkadi

          And I’m glad I’m not the only one here who’s old enough to know about it! 😀

      2. Disloyal Subject

        I… Uh…
        To the Googlemobile!

      3. kelticat

        I really liked it when Death breaks the fourth wall and says “This is a banana, not an erect penis”

        1. kelticat

          BTW if you can find the graphic novel “Death: the High Cost of Living” the condom manual is within.

        2. Deanatay

          My wife owns a copy. It is awesome.

  4. MrSirk

    Walky wouldn’t sleep with Billie unless she were feeling really worthless and vulnerable…oh wait that happened already..hrmm tough one.

  5. newllend

    Maybe you should make one for yourself Joyce it would things a lot easier.

  6. Mkvenner

    This is going to be good. 🙂

  7. Khaner

    Uh-oh! Time for a series of tragic but wacky antics!

  8. Yotomoe

    As if we all can’t be tempted by the Billie Boobies.

    1. newllend

      They have some sort of hypnotic trance

      1. Yotomoe

        They turn straight women gay, Gay men straight, and Straight guys into toast.

        1. Lightning

          Buttered or jellied?

        2. Dibullba

          Those entranced are buttered while said person’s love interest is jellied.

    2. Deanatay

      Her body does sort of scream ‘insert tab A into slot B’, if you know what I mean.

  9. Ragnal

    Hasn’t it been explained to Joyce before that Billie and Walky are closer brother and sister to one another than Walky and Sal are? Does she STILL think they have a romantic dynamic to them or something?!

    1. JessWitt

      She shipped them a few times before.

    2. MrSirk

      It’s actually more incestuous to have sex with Billie than Sal. Emotionally not genetically.

      1. The_Master

        I’m pretty sure Dorothy knows this too. Even if Joyce hasn’t quite grasped the concept of relationship dynamics.

    3. Yotomoe

      That’s exactly why she’s worried. She’s watched romcoms. She knows how this works.

      1. Deanatay

        “The Girl Next Door” is a powerful romance meme. “Like a sister” is, too, really. Joyce’s concern is justified. We just happen to know it’s not true.

        1. Swerve

          Wait, it’s not? Are you saying all those rom-coms Bluestreak’s been showing have lied to us about human mating rituals? Damn you “Bridget Jones Diary”!

          …Well I’m not gonna be the one to tell Whirl.

    4. Romanticide

      Joyce will probably need more years to process that information, that and that sexually active women won’t fuck any male with a pulse and that might even sleep with some and not be interested to have any sex at all XD

  10. JessWitt

    And here comes the dramamine.

    1. Barf Ninjason

      Is Joyce flying somewhere today?

      1. Kelly

        no, it is for you!

        1. Static Air

          said the Flying Mikes.

        2. Ocksgrough

          +1

        3. Ocksgrough

          …said the flying Ambers, apparently. I thought I was Sal!

        4. Koms

          Ah..It is Sal

    2. Blob Marley

      This drama mine goes deep. REAL deep. Like ALL THE WAY deep.

      1. Clif

        You’re saying it’s drama all the way down?

  11. John

    I think someone’s projecting.

    1. Sambo

      Flying Billies here we come!

  12. newllend

    Anyway there is a lot of trust between those two that’s and support between these two, to bad relationship like this doesn’t happen more often in real life then divorc wouldn’t be an issue.

  13. Kamino Neko

    … Not helping, Joyce.

    1. newllend

      But that’s her stick she never does.

      1. Yotomoe

        Schtick*

        1. Static Air

          At least she sticks to her schtick, though.

        2. Yotomoe

          That’s cuz its Sticky Schtick.

        3. Plasma Mongoose

          Schtick is the female equivalent of fap right?

        4. Disloyal Subject

          No, that’s schlick. It’s onamotopoeia.

        5. Disloyal Subject

          Onomatopoeia, my bad.
          And a schtick is a gimmick or regular behavior.
          …this is the part where it turns out you already knew all that and then I feel silly, isn’t it?

        6. Plasma Mongoose

          I was close, the difference with just one cross of the T.

  14. Marvelman

    Hmmm… Does Joyce have ulterior motives for telling this to Dorothy? Motives that may not be exactly… Christian?

    1. newllend

      Everything she does is for the purpose on ending they’re relationship.

      1. CommunistCanada

        What about the time that she forced them back together?

        1. Kryss LaBryn

          Yes, but only so Dorothy could dump Walky instead of the other way ’round.

          She’s probably still kicking herself for that one.

    2. Yotomoe

      Manipulating people using questionable evidence is the most Christian thing a girl can do.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        What, no swordplay? No gifts of sorbet to the enemy general when he falls ill- wait, that was the saracen. Still cool, though.

    3. thebooksluts

      I don’t think she meant to tell Dorothy. I don’t think Joyce wants to HURT Dorothy, and this could have.

      1. Heavensrun

        Yeah, but Joyce is physically incapable of lying to anyone, especially Dotty.

        1. begbert2

          Herself excepted, of course.

  15. Regalli

    I know this is going to lead to wacky hijinks, but I get the distinct feeling Walky didn’t feel the need to mention this to Dorothy out of respect for Billie’s privacy, but also because of the whole “Billie’s basically his other sister” thing. Like, yeah, it’s a sign things are bad of course, but it doesn’t occur to him that other people could perceive it as sexual because it’s BILLIE, that’d never happen. And that makes me feel d’awwy.

    1. Rosicrucian

      Yeah, and Dorothy yet again proves she’s the one who’s got her shit together the most because she’s not going to accuse him of anything.

      1. Kryss LaBryn

        And yet, she is taking of the headband in a very deliberate way.

        Time for business.

  16. Bill

    I confess I am somewhat perplexed in that we are about five or six weeks into the semester, and in that length of time Joyce has gone from freaking out about even the merest hint of premarital hanky-panky to being able to discuss it in what appears to be a non-judgmental manner.  Given what we know about Joyce’s strict upbringing it seems to me that far too little time has passed.

    1. Thomas64

      It’s Comic Book Time, I guess. Given how slowly time passes in the comic compared to real time, character development would be impossible without taking some liberties.

    2. liahansen

      I dunno. If she had spent her time like actual people do (the vast majority of it just sitting around doing nothing, talking to no one. That’s what other people do, right?) I think you’d be right, but a LOT has happened, and she’s made some pretty progressive friends. If you ignore the time-frame and just look at the events, the development makes sense, doesn’t it? So if the events actually physically fit into the time-frame, why shouldn’t she have developed that much? It’s like Romeo and Juliet. The whole thing takes place over a couple of days, but it feels like more for both the audience and the characters, so the development works.

      1. deathjavu

        Bed example…R&J was about how dumb teenagers…are…

        Oh balls.

      2. Deanatay

        You gotta admit, there’s been a LOT of premarital hanky-panky going on within her new circle of friends. And most of them are unconcerned about it. A girl has one of two choices: 1) accept it, and learn to deal with it, or 2) remove yourself from that circle of friends, and find another one. Joyce has clearly chosen the former, probably because the circle includes Dorothy, whom she idolizes, and who’s getting plenty of PMHP.

        (Hey, look, I made an acronym. Yay me.)

        1. Oldfart

          I feel the urge to pedantically point out that initials are only acronyms when they can be pronounced as a word. NATO is an acronym; NBA is not. Although I admit that the meanings of words change constantly, and inevitably acronym will come to mean any set of initials, if it doesn’t already. OK, it does now. Damn. But I insist on using it the way I learned it. And electrocution always kills, otherwise it’s just a shock. I hate being old, especially since I have no lawn to shoo you kids off of.

    3. Boom

      It’s been a week.

  17. alicemacher

    Now if this were nearly any other webcomic, I’d be saying, “Ooh, fun! Wacky-misunderstanding farce time!” and reaching for the popcorn. But because this is DoA, I think this’ll be one of those “gets much worse before it gets better–if it gets better” plots.

    1. MM

      It wouldn’t surprise me if this turns out to be a distraction for some other gets worse before it gets better scenario. (Which admittedly is still not an encouraging popcorn prospect.)

      1. Static Air

        If that’s the case, my bet is it involves Sarah, since we were introduced to an even grumpier Sarah than usual for this arc. Maybe Jacob, too.

  18. JA

    is that booklet available for purchase anywhere?

    1. David M Willis

      http://www.orgymania.net

      1. JA

        I see what you did there. hahaha

      2. bodmans

        I really like how your gravatar seems to fit with every comment…

        1. bodmans

          also kind of scary as well

        2. JA

          I think it’s the mustache. Scares little kids and mothers.

        3. Disloyal Subject

          I believe they were referring to The Willis’ gravatar. Though Inigo is versatile too.

        4. Kryss LaBryn

          Wait–“moustache”? What–there’s no–You mean Willis’s icon, right?

          –Moustache? O_o

        5. anonymous

          I think they didn’t realize bodmans was talking about the icon. They’re talking about the thing on the link.

      3. Jen Aside

        oh, I’ve read that one then

  19. Sylvester Crow

    Really? Nobody is commenting on how Joyce actually knew what Dorothy was talking aboit? Or even how she totally just said thay about Billie? I’m seriously the only one?

    1. Sylvester Crow

      *about. Damn autocorrect never works when you actually want it to!

      1. Disloyal Subject

        No kidding. It just tried to change “Inigo Montoya” to “In I Go Montoya.” I think it reads too much smut.
        On which note, we don’t know the details of Joyce’s late-night laptop activities; she may know a lot more about sex now than she did recently.

  20. Rosicrucian

    Joyce thinking Billie is some sort of walking Kama Sutra says more about Joyce than about Billie.

    1. Deanatay

      This seems to be a mental side-effect of college – you think a LOT about sex there. Or, was that just me?

  21. Malchus

    Why am I picturing Dorothy writing something IKEA-like? The IKEA Sutra.

    1. metaceryn

      Tab A, Slot B, and only the most simple of tools required.

      1. Roborat

        Wait, what? I am supposed to insert the allen wrench where?

    2. Static Air

      Definitely something I would read while eating Swedish meatballs.

      1. Paradox

        Why the meatballs?

        1. eerilychildish

          because IKEA, obvs.

    3. Jen Aside

      Required: Blobby naked thing person x2.

      Step 1: One blobby thing approaches another blobby thing.
      Step 2: Blobby thing on left grabs crotch of blobby thing on right.
      Step 3: Blobby thing puts face in other blobby thing’s crotch.
      Step 4: Blobby thing ejaculates some kind of excretion.

      1. Kryss LaBryn

        Step 1: Insert Tab A into Slot B.
        Step 2: Partially remove Tab A from Slot B.
        Step 3: Repeat as needed.

        –Although, considering her dream about Ethan’s detachable unit, even Step 1 might be a bit beyond her.

        1. Jen Aside

          Thing is, those, IKEA manuals are really silly if you pretend you can’t understand them.

  22. Idon'tcarenomore

    Way to go, you jelouse little beast, be sure to accidently let it slip that Dorothy’s boyfriend spent the night with his old buddy Billie, and top it off with the crack about Billie being a sex manual.

    Joyce knows exactly what she’s doing.

    1. timemonkey

      Informing her best friend of a situation she thinks might hurt her?

      1. saltchocolate

        It does seem like she “accidentally” let that slip out really easily . . . How could she possibly “forget” not to mention this info in 1.5 seconds??

      2. Joe

        Nope, Willis is totally going the “evil mastermind intent on breaking them up” route, there is no sensible action here.
        I bet she even planted alcohol on Ruth, knowing that it would eventually drive Billie to Walky.

      3. Some guy

        Her last line is well over “warning” and into “mindlessly inflammatory.” It also speaks to her opinion of Walky – she’s going out of her way to say that something MUST have happened.

  23. Charles Phipps

    I think the interesting thing is that Billie and Walky have an emotional bond which Dot and Walky don’t have. That’s actually more dangerous to their relationship than sex.

    Walky, flat out, cares about Sal more than Dot.

    And…really, he should.

    1. kelticat

      Dorothy and Walky tried to base the relationship on casual sex, but they formed an emotional bond before the sex, resulting in the potential for both of them to get hurt when they break up.

  24. Leonou

    Thank you.
    I really needed a funny comic to draw right now.

    1. Leonou

      draw Read !

  25. JessWitt

    No Dorothy, headband on! Headband on!

    1. Leorale

      Would you like the mustache on, or off?
      Off, please.
      Too bad.

    2. tinfoil theory

      Mask on!
      Flame on!

      1. Jen Aside

        Jack on, jack off…

  26. TGFrank

    Speaking of sexual humor

    http://i.imgur.com/as7s5Wf.png

    1. Roborat

      Am I missing something, that seems to be a link to this comic.

  27. beege

    I didn’t think Joyce could be that catty, even completely unintentionally.

  28. Arkadi

    Er… why is everyone taking for granted that this is gonna be big DRAMA? Why can’t Dorothy see that Walky and Billie are childhood buddies and he cares about her, and just be fine with it? O_o

    1. Yoohoo

      What I wanna know is why everyone expects Billie to be in there at all? Isn’t Billie with Ruth right now?

      1. Deanatay

        Yeah, but nobody knows that. Billie and Ruth have been pretty stealthy about their relationship. Billie’s relationship with Walky, OTOH, is completely public (cause it’s just a friendship), therefore she doesn’t hide anything about it. Thus, when something potentially suggestive happens between them, everyone finds out about it.

        1. Yoohoo

          Oh I meant the commenters, hehe.

  29. Crumplepunch

    The hairband has released its dread grip.

    The nightmare is over.

  30. Tarsen

    …Joyce’s last comment seems…unfair.

    like, Billie’s a shameless drunk, not a slut? I’m confused as to where Joyce got this impression of her. It actually comes across as kind of manipulative of Joyce, imo.

    1. Bagge

      More like prejudiced than manupilative I would say. I have no problem seeing Joyce equating “someone who likes to party” with “Lots and lots of premartial hankypanky.” Also, didn’t Billie basically described herself to Joyce that way when she asked about relationship advice.

      1. -JAD-

        Somehow I just find Joyce’s description of Billie funny and adorable, very Joyce-like.

    2. Thomas64

      Billie might have given Joyce the impression that she’s very experienced. It looked a bit like a pose, but Joyce may still have been naive enough at that point to take it at face value.

    3. Some guy

      She’s also making a general assumption that Walky is unfaithful, which seems unfair.

    4. Heavensrun

      Yeah, I can’t think of where Joyce got the idea that Billie was sexually promiscuous and experienced with both men and women. Except for all the times Billie told her she was sexually promiscuous and experienced with both men and women.

    5. Heavensrun

      Also, you lose points for jumping from Joyce’s line to “Billie’s a slut”. All she actually implied is that “anybody looking at (or possibly interacting with) Billie will know what to do.”

  31. Kevin

    I smell a “Walky Performs a Hypothetic Non-Canon Sex” coming up…

    1. Kevin

      I am quite confident I typed ‘hypothetical’. Just because it’s late and I’m exhausted doesn’t make reality more accurate than me…

  32. hof1991

    President Kean at her press conference in expressed complete confidence in First Boyfriend Walky. He resigned later that day.

    DYW just repeated that he broke up with her over being awaken too early. She has definite fire in her eyes now and an accusation would not play well with Walky. At her command, this is a casual relationship. Now she’s not confident about a whole range of things – his fidelity, her real feelings for him.

    And Joyce is throwing gasoline on the fire and not by mistake. At best, she is concerned about her friend, but more likely she is envious. Her only defense is that she expects all PMHP to end badly.

    1. hof1991

      Rereading I see that Dorothy is only confident of Walky because he’s inexperienced. Not because of the strength of their relationship. Not because they make a great couple / coupling. Pretty thin soup. If that’s her only hold on him, no wonder she’s so concerned.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        People don’t necessarily list all their reasons for believing something whenever it’s brought up.
        Especially when it’s early in the morning and they’re feeling snarky.

  33. gka

    That’s right, Joyce. You don’t come across as gay /at all/ when you say these things.

  34. Clif

    Yay Dorothy.

  35. Rutee

    Joyce, you minx. I know you want to sleep with her, but this is just fiendish. I dig it.

  36. Willoughby Chase

    The Illustrated Lady perhaps.

  37. Vangeln

    Shut up Joyce!

  38. Tenn

    More like “throw the boob at him” amirite? *trollface*

    Sorry.

    *more trollface*

  39. zebrathinker

    I can’t quite tell if Dorothy’s expression in the last panel is a “i’m gonna go find out what happened” face or not

  40. StClair

    “… Could you print me a copy too, please?”

    1. Clif

      +1 Internet.

  41. Marvelman

    I think Dorothy already knows nothing happened. Both Dorothy and Walky also realize they are all wrong for each other. They like each other but this relationship will never last. Danny and Walky really aren’t that different from each other. If anything, I think Dorothy is probably jealous of the emotional intimacy Walky seems to have with Billie but does not and probably will never have with her.

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