146

Touched
Posted on February 20, 2023 by David M Willis

146 thoughts on “Touched”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    Sarah: This escalated quickly

    1. Clif

      Kept getting better.

    2. ValdVin

      Joyc: “It was a small load. We did it by hand-holding.”
      Sarah: Where did you learn that joke?”
      Joyce: “…joke?”

      1. Harmony

        Sarah is surprisingly genre aware in that last sentence.

  2. Doctor_Who

    “We listened to music so it would be more like we were just hanging out. Totally not gay!”

    “Melissa Etheridge and the Indigo Girls?”

    “Yes! How did you know?”

    1. Cholma

      I legit laughed at this. +1 internets for you.

    2. Sajuuk-Khar

      Amazing. My internets as well.

    3. easrng

      type of girl who enjoys both indigo girls and assorted hyperpop (it’s me i’m the girl) (i got my indigo girls listening from my moms and my hyperpop listening from my friends) (two very different kinds of gay music (both good))

    4. Reltzik

      “Also this one Bikini Kill song?”

  3. Sirksome

    But you are acknowledging it was in fact gay. Another brave step to me.

    1. Regalli

      Agreed. At this rate Joyce might admit she’s biromantic within the next decade!

      1. Carla's #2 Fan

        Which would only be a month or so for her!

      2. The Wellerman

        Warms my little gay heart! ?

      3. Proxiehunter

        Someone’s going to have to explain the concept to her first. She gets gay, she maybe gets bi but I doubt she gets the concept of being biromantic but not bisexual.

        1. KiaStirling

          oooo yeah I wonder how explaining the split attraction model to her would go. Or who would do it. (Dorothy would want to be the one to do it because Dorothy, but who would actually introduce Joyce to the concept?)

        2. Leadsynth

          Leslie! In the 200-level gender studies course.

      4. Imogen

        I do think Joyce could also be bisexual, for what it’s worth. Sexualities change and evolve. I didn’t realize I could be attracted to men until my mid-twenties.

  4. shadowcell

    Dumbing of Age Book 13: It Wasn’t As Gay As It Sounds

    alternatively:

    Dumbing of Age Book 13: What

    1. AbacusWizard

      Dumbing of Age Book 13: Like Some Kind Of Normal Person

  5. Yotomoe

    I mean it was the gayest thing I’d ever seen. And I’ve seen lesbian sex.

    1. anon

      i’m sure becky would take that as a challenge

      1. Doctor_Who

        Becky vows to be twice as gay.

        This will require two Dina’s. Luckily, a mosquito was recently found preserved in amber…

        (No not preserved in Amber, that would be weird).

        1. The Wellerman

          ???

        2. Yotomoe

          To be fair, Amber is Dina’s roommate. It would make sense that Dina’s DNA would be on her person.

        3. StClair

          “Bruce’s DNA was easy enough to obtain, he left it all over town. … Not remotely what I meant.”

        4. Jamie

          Was there enough Dina in there? Or are they going to have to fill in the missing bits with … *searches for cast name starting with F* … nevermind.

        5. The Wellerman

          “uh uh uh you didn’t say the magic word” ???

        6. AbacusWizard

          I accidentally enrolled in paleontology school twice, now I’m… Two Dinas

    2. Decidedly Orthogonal

      I once saw a faggot hanging out on a curb. It was autumn. The leaves had turned. Lawns were cut. All alone, one bundle of sticks. Tied neatly with a small canvas strap. It was… artisanal. It made me happy. In that beautiful moment, looking at a faggot made me very gay.

      1. Opus the Poet

        That’s the other definition of faggot. The non-gendered one.

  6. Dinajoyce

    Have we ever seen the whites of Sarah’s eyes disappear before? I feel like she’s usually too unflappable for her eyes to vanish

    1. True Survivor

      I don’t think so. It reminds me of this funny comic though:
      https://www.smbc-comics.com/comic/see

    2. Nono

      I know we have, I just can’t remember when. I’ll probably do some archive digging in a bit.

      1. Nono

        Ah, found one: https://www.dumbingofage.com/2021/comic/book-11/03-see-you-in-the-funny-page/prettier/

    3. GeekyWarrior

      When Mike recorded Walky Crying
      https://www.dumbingofage.com/2018/comic/book-8/04-of-mike-and-men/recording/

      1. egg egg

        Man I miss Mike

  7. anon

    totally platonic straight girl moments lol

    1. StClair

      Just like when it was her and Becky.

    2. Erica

      Just gals being pals

  8. DailyBrad

    It was still kinda gay, though plenty of straight people have done “kinda gay” things while still being straight.

    I just have my doubts Joyce is one of them.

    1. Yotomoe

      Straight people can do gay things. Gay people can do straight things. There’s like a BILLION things in the world to do, some of them are gonna be gay.

      1. Sirksome

        It’s almost like gay and straight are just arbitrary ways of describing the infinite variables that make the human experience.

        1. Wraithy2773

          Yup. It’s all just shorthand, because its a whole lot easier to say “I’m straight” than “I’m not into men or have any interest in dating men and am entirely comfortable with my state as a cis man, but I have played games as a female character getting it on with both male and female characters, and I’m not entirely sure where that puts me on a Kinsey chart but either way I’m not into you dude”.

          I mean, just count the syllables.

        2. Yotomoe

          …Are you me?

      2. Yumi

        My gender is whatever makes the (inter)action gay, personally.

      3. TerribleTransit

        Just over 8 billion things, right about now. And about half gay.

    2. Byron Orpheus

      “I’m totally straight! OK, I do give one or two hand jobs a day. Every day. Since I was 12. But it’s not gay because it was my penis I was caressing with passion and love.”

  9. Taffy

    Love this muchly.

  10. Yotomoe

    I had a dream last night that Willis had drawn a pinup of Joyce so I hurriedly sketched it down this morning.
    https://imgur.com/a/kJWuZYa (Suggestive)
    Also someone requested Joyce and Jennifer so I doodled that too.

    1. DailyBrad

      I do like the vibe you draw Joyce with. Very coquettish.

    2. The Wellerman

      ???

      Hey I dreamed of a Joyce pinup quite some time back too.

      A Joyce slipshine banner, actually.

      Anyone here have any similar dreams?

  11. Karla Jean

    All masturbation is homosexual.

    1. The Wellerman

      wait is that a thing earthlings actually believe ?

      1. zee

        Only for fun

        1. thejeff

          There are some weirdos out there who seem to actually think like that.

          I mean, of course it’s gay. You’re touching the genitals of someone of the same sex as you. How much gayer can it get?

    2. Taffy

      Not if my RealDoll is straight, it’s not.

    3. eh, whatever

      Only for narcissists.

    4. Wizard

      Ah, but what if a trans person masturbates?

      1. Leorale

        There are many different ways of thinking about one’s own genitals, and not all ways are dysphoric.

        1. Leorale

          And not all masturbation involves genitals.

          Anyway, you’re sexing up a person of your own gender.

          If you’re a transwoman, for example, then you’re sexing up a transwoman. If you’re nonbinary, you’re sexing up a nonbinary person.

          George_Takei_Oh_My.gif

  12. Yotomoe

    This brings up an interesting philosophical question I want to posit to the commenters.
    If you cloned yourself and had sex with them would it be gay or masturbation?
    (If you’ve seen Tonkatsu Sinclair you already know my answer.)

    1. Devin

      Why not both?

      1. The Wellerman

        Wuv this answer ?

    2. Yumi

      Ah, the classic question of clone fucking! Choose or add your own:

      ☐ I don’t want to fuck my clone because that would be gay sex and I’m not gay.
      ☐ I’m not gay, but I would actually totally fuck my clone.
      ☐ I’m gay, but I still don’t want to fuck my clone, that’s gross and weird.
      ☐ I don’t want to fuck my clone because my self-loathing is THAT strong.
      ☐ I’d totally fuck my clone because I want to know if I’m good in bed.
      ☐ I’d fuck my clone because who would know better how to fuck ME than ME?
      ☐ I’d totally do all sort of weird things to my clone I’d be embarrassed to ask someone else to do.
      ☐ To be honest, fucking my clone has always been my fantasy.
      ☐ It’s basically the same as masturbating, right? So no big deal.
      ☐ It’s not the same as masturbating; it’d be like having sex with your twin. Wrong and bad!
      ☐ I would not have sex with my clone because what if my clone is evil.
      ☐ Not only would I have sex with my clone, I’d probably make a bunch of clones and just get it on with all of them at once because that’s how pro clone-fucking I am.

      1. Dana

        There’ve got to be some twins who rationalized getting it on with “It’s no worse than having sex with your clone.”

        1. TulipKitten

          I mean, there is a very miniscule chance of offspring if you’re doing your twin. Well, identical at least. Fraternal, you’re probably kinda screwed there.

      2. TulipKitten

        You forgot the other choice, my choice:

        ☐ I’m gay but I wouldn’t fuck my clone because I’m honestly not sure if I could make myself orgasm, and it would just be awkward for the both of us

        1. Mano308gts

          They left out several other perfectly reasonable responses, including the following (among others):

          ☐ I’m straight, but I wouldn’t fuck my clone because that’s gross and weird.

          ☐ I’m gay and I wouldn’t fuck my own clone, but I want to fuck clones of other people (possibly more than one clone of them).

          ☐ I’m straight and I wouldn’t fuck my own clone, but I want to fuck clones of other people (possibly more than one clone of them).

      3. Wraithy2773

        How about “I might be open to fucking my clone, I’m not sure right now, but I damn well know I’d be too damn awkward about it all to get anything going”?

        1. Keulen

          Same, we’d probably just end up playing video games together or talking or something.

      4. Azhrei Vep

        ☐ I have to immediately kill my clone because I know it will immediately try to kill and replace me, because that’s what I would do in its position. No sex, necrophilia is gross and weird.

      5. Dr. Sharks

        I would be the king of fucking my clone. I would have my own clone bone throne.

      6. Aussir

        In my case I’m one of The Straights and wouldn’t be interested in a person who looked like me, but it does occur to me; what if I *was* gay, but just wasn’t into masc dudes?

      7. Yumi

        I’d have some interest in fucking my clone in that I’d like to get more comfortable in working with our shared equipment, except I know that neither of us would be super into being touched that way, so then what? Need to clone swap with a friend or something.

      8. shoopdawhoop

        Missed one option: YES

      9. StClair

        My orientation isn’t compatible and even if it were, I don’t like my body. “Self-loathing” it is, then.

    3. Jamie

      Neither. The term of art is “selfcest”.

    4. True Survivor

      I mean its a fully sentient being that just happens to share all your DNA. Its like having sex with your identical twin. Therefore, it is not masturbation, but incest … and also very gay.

      You ever seen the robot chicken parody of clone wars they made about this topic using the actual Star Wars the Clone Wars VA?

    5. adam Black

      For you it’s straight. But for the clone: hella, hella Gay.

      1. adam Black

        Better make the clone gay, or forget it

    6. The Wellerman

      Depends. Are your memories copied into the clone? If so, masturbation. If not, gay.

    7. Francoinblanco

      Depends
      if I have “twins” Connection with clone – masturbation
      If just human identical to me gay

    8. DailyBrad

      I think it’s only masturbation if you and the clone are still sharing a mind. If you two have effectively become two different beings, then it’s gay and sorta incest.

    9. Slartibeast Button, BIA

      Incest

    10. Xtifr

      It takes a minimum of eighteen years and nine months to produce a clone old enough to have sex with, and in eighteen years and nine months, I’ll be too old to have sex with an eighteen-year-old even if it is technically legal at that point. (Ignoring possible incest issues.) So it’s really a moot question as far as I’m concerned. 🙂

    11. milu

      If we’re talking scifi scenarios, rather than an actual clone, how about just a simulated clone in a futuristic hyper realistic VR game?

      And my answer is, sure i’ll fuck my clone, that sounds like a good time, but honestly i’m more excited to just have conversations. I talk to myself constantly as it is, so it would be nice for myself to reply.

  13. Yumi

    bro I love Sarah

  14. butts

    yeah that was my reaction when it happened, Sarah

  15. jeffepp

    It certainly wasn’t as gay as Joyce was hoping for.

    1. DailyBrad

      Maybe so, though she did still eject Dorothy from the room when it came time to finish.

  16. BBCC

    It really honestly could not be.

  17. Radiance

    This is perfect and we better not cut away any time soon. I need at least a week of this conversation where Joyce and Sarah fully unpack “Dorothy walked into my room and said ‘I’m going to teach you to masturbate’.”

    1. Axel

      yes, please

  18. Chaucer59

    Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

  19. jackiedu46k

    Making it sound like she took a lot of steps

  20. Nathan

    Some amazing eye journeys happening here.

    1. Sajuuk-Khar

      Sarah’s faces join Joyce’s faces in the glorious crop of reactions from this arc, lmao, I love them

  21. Francoinblanco

    I’m glad the comic touch the topic that was at least weird

    1. Zuzi

      I think Sarah’s reaction here is more her thinking that Joyce and Dorothy had sex (or at least masturbated together) since Joyce hasn’t told her the specifics of how this demonstration went down

      1. Francoinblanco

        It was such a level of intimacy that it’s strange that there was no sex. In order to beat that, Joyce has to hold Dorothys hand during her first time with Joe

      2. Needfuldoer

        Every time Joyce tried to clarify, she just made it worse.

        She really is flustered again.

      3. GholaHalleck

        To be FAIR, they DID masturbate together. Dotty just let Joyce finish off by herself.

  22. Raen

    Honestly, I’m a little surprised she’s so surprised.

  23. BOOSTER SHOT

    This fuckin arc, man

  24. RassilonTDavros

    …I mean, if it wasn’t as gay as it sounds, that implies it was still at least somewhat gay.

    1. Slartibeast Button, BIA

      What are the SI standard units for gayness intensity?

      1. Taffy

        Scovilles.

      2. Proxiehunter

        Lumities.

      3. GholaHalleck

        Turings.

      4. Council

        Millisapphos

      5. Moonlighter

        Angles? As in deviations from a straight line?

        1. Slartibeast Button, BIA

          Complex numbers, certainly.

      6. AbacusWizard

        Degrees Kinsey.

  25. Mr. Random

    It was still a decent amount of gay.

  26. Mr. Random

    Considering how often that we’re told that Joyce is supposed to be autobiographical, I’m continually wondering if Mr. Willis himself had a bisexual awakening from some dude on campus or if this is all just fun in story.

    1. Yotomoe

      Putting the Bi in the AutoBIography

    2. GholaHalleck

      Just two bros making balloon animals into the wee hours of the night, holding hands.

      1. shoopdawhoop

        Did involve the laundry room though

    3. Jay

      As a nonbinary person, it is entirely possible to be into women in a gay way and a straight way.

      Also, Willis’ pronouns on Twitter are he/they.

      So, there’s a couple more possible options for a bisexual awakening than “some dude” there, but go have fun speculating!

  27. DarkoNeko

    what

  28. Sajuuk-Khar

    “No no no, Sarah, it was just so I wouldn’t fuck Joe! That’s not very gay at all!”

    “…Joyce, it remains gay as hell even if I understand it and will support it with my bat.”

  29. Throwatron

    everything was worth it for this strip don’t @ me

    1. LIGHTWEIGHT BAYBEE

      tru sarah is the goat

  30. Deviant

    “And then we burned insence”
    “What”
    “And listened to sapphic indie pop ballads”
    “What”

    1. Deviant

      “On a bed of roses”
      “What?”

      1. Taffy

        “I said we did it on Rose’s bed. Have you met Rose? She’s like if Amber and Ruth had a baby together.”

        1. Needfuldoer

          So she’s trying to get a kiss from a Rose?

  31. Acher4

    Just Sarah’s eyes…. lol

  32. foducool

    lmao yeah it sounds worse than what actually happened

  33. AGV

    -Well, at least it wasn’t Joe, eh?
    -Hahaha yeah, not like I’d have enjoyed that or anything ??

  34. Amós Batista

    Pheww, just thought Sarah would freaked out, since her questioning Joyce yesterday

  35. Suet

    Maybe Sarah forgot that by grabbing the bull, the horns come with it. Yet there’s still a very crucial aspect that prevents it from going sapphic.

    “Fellas, is it —” Still YES though!

  36. Acher4

    ohohoh, just clicked.

    Becky will soon hear it out for certain now.

    Becky is going to flip! :O

  37. Daibhid C

    I haven’t checked the other comments yet, but I suppose the Dorothy/Joyce shippers are reading something into this perfectly normal conversation as well?

  38. Adept

    “Gals being laundry pals” is a great sentence.

  39. CianM1301

    But they were five feet apart, so it wasn’t gay. At least that’s what we’ve learned from the hot tub incident.

  40. aelfwine

    If Sarah wants Joyce to not be freaking out over normal things, then perhaps she should stop being so fucking hypocritical and having the largest of freakouts over normal things, like she fucking did yesterday, and she stop meddling in Joyce’s business like she’s still doing today.

    Oh my god I despise Sarah so much. What the fucking shit was Sarah’s business whether Joyce had masturbated or not? Has this asshole even ever heard of the fucking concept of fucking PRIVACY?

    1. yak

      Sarah’s always been an asshole. This is entirely within character for her, people only like her because she isn’t actively malicious. Same with Mike.

      1. Needfuldoer

        “she isn’t actively malicious”

        Except that one time she launched the Joyce torpedo at the S.S. Jaidah.

      2. Adept

        She absolutely is an arsehole. She’s a somewhat likeable, relatable arsehole, but arsehole nevertheless.

    2. Jodka

      Calm down Raidah.

  41. Lysbeth

    What is gayer?
    1) being gay
    2) what Joyce and Dorothy have got going

    (I’m literally a lesbian and I’m leaning towards 2. Also, BECKY CAN NEVER KNOW)

    1. The Wellerman

      This is Dumbing of Age. Of COURSE she’s gonna eventually know. That’s when the real explosion is gonna come.

  42. shoopdawhoop

    Well now that all this anxiety has come back she’s going to have to go do more laundry

  43. Raen

    I still wonder when someone is going to let Joyce know that everyone thinks she’s bi. Probably not Sarah, because she’s Sarah.

  44. Kyrik Michalowski

    Joyce I don’t know how to break this to you, but that was gayer than Becky and you know it. Not that it is a bad thing, except Dorothy might be heterosexual or heteroromantic; if that is the case then you’ll have to settle for Joe.

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