143

Boozytimes
Posted on August 16, 2024 by David M Willis

143 thoughts on “Boozytimes”

  1. IntangibleMatter

    If she’s trying to waggle her eyebrows suggestively she has only suggested a vague idea of discomfort and a need to go to the bathroom.

    1. Blibdoolpoolp

      I think trying really hard to avoid a sneeze would also be a potential suggestion from panel 6’s Joyce-face

    2. Needfuldoer

      But she does need to go to the bathroom.

      That’s where the shower is.

      1. Segnosaur

        Question… Do they have toilets in the communal shower rooms if the dorm?

        It may seem redundant since each room has its own bathroom, but they may have them for visitors.

        1. Hof1991

          Yes. For visitors and for when you need one and your room one is occupied. Or if you’re showering and need one.

    3. Mark

      Give her a break. She’s new at this.

    4. Deanatay

      I AM SEDUCING YOU

      YOU ARE SEDUCED

  2. Golden Yak

    *I’m* turned on.

    1. Decidedly Orthogonal

      Is that from the dead Mike referrence in the alt text?

  3. Thag Simmons

    That’s a big promise Joe

    1. DashWallkick

      Especially since we know his concepts of dating are largely building up to sex.

  4. Yumi

    Mike’s gonna read the hover text, accept it as a challenge, and that’s how he’s going to return to the comic.

    1. Schpoonman

      Don’t you dare.

    2. Taffy

      Cyber-Mike Rises, coming to theaters (and in your mom) Summer 2025.

      1. CianM1301

        Ticket price is one nickel.

    3. Meagan

      I still haven’t ruled out such an occurrence. The comments section was way too convinced that it was a fake out, there is basically nothing that is going to make me give up my prepared for a ‘gotcha.” Don’t even bother.

    4. Dday

      Maybe he managed to schedule some real gut punch of a tweet before he died.

      1. Matthew Davis

        He convinced Danny, who coded it, that it was or something else and will make him push the button accordingly.

    5. Segnosaur

      Yeah but given Joyce’s new attitude, she will be the one getting punched every few seconds for having “lustful thoughts”.

    6. Michael Steamweed

      Could be it turns out Mike had a long-lost twin brother who finally learned about him. :O

      1. Amelie Wikström

        “I’m Mike’s identical twin brother, Mike 2. Mike has already told me everything you all have been up to so there’s no need to fill me in or anything, and to make things easier you can just call me Mike.”

    7. Merbrat

      *wah* I can’t sort how to see alt-text, on phone ot tablet! Help?
      I think I used to know, but I’ve slept since then.

      1. Andy

        At least on android, tapping the empty space under the bottom right of the comic has a pop-up showing the alt text. Also long pressing the comic will show most of all of the alt text.

  5. HueSatLight

    Its worse when they just waggle on their own and you can’t stop them.

  6. Kyrik Michalowski

    Alt text: “Oof.”

    1. Rose by Any other Name

      … that’s what he said.

      (sorry, not sorry)

      1. Kyrik Michalowski

        … XD
        My ribs now hurt from laughing, so thank you(./?)

  7. cbwroses

    Nothing so sexy as the old Groucho Marx eyebrow wriggle.

    1. Doctor_Who

      (Margaret Dumont has liked your post)

    2. Dday

      I refuse to join any shower that would have me as a member.

      1. Mark

        🙂

      2. Michael Steamweed

        But do you refuse to join any club that would have your member?

        1. Dday

          Outside of his member, I’d say a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of his member, its too dark to read.

  8. Nono

    Sounds like some high brow flirting.

    1. Hoboturtle

      The day has only just begun. You didn’t have to make people resort to violence.

    2. True Survivor

      She is the fore-head-most expert in seduction.

    3. Michael Steamweed

      Eye see what you did there.

    4. Deanatay

      Don’t get so angry, you’ll just start lashing out.

  9. saltchocolate

    Damn, hovertext!!

    (I thought this might be a full “Damn you, Willis” but I decided that has to be reserved for confounding things happening in the comic itself….)

  10. John Campbell

    I suppose they could get Booster to glue a yellow broom to their forehead…

    1. Needfuldoer

      Amber and Amazi-Girl get distracted bickering with each other long enough for Brain!Mike to take the helm.

  11. yak

    Well Joyce got over that quickly.

    1. Switchchris

      She Trusts Joe, and trust can go a long way. Trauma doesn’t always hit you hard, sometimes its just a quick shock and you can calm yourself down once you have a moment to think or if your with somebody you trust.
      Joe is correct, she chose to get drunk herself and didn’t ask if he would even want to drink, he was obviously feeling uncomfortable about it even before she started drinking. So even if him not drinking triggered her trauma, she put herself in that situation, not Joe. He also made sure she was safe and having fun the whole night, got her home safe and without them getting caught with her drunk off her ass. She would probably find it hard to stay upset at him for being a responsible boyfriend.

      1. DashWallkick

        I think she on some level understands she’s being irrational. “I’m not fragile.” “Relationships are.” probably hit home for her, given she kinda blew up hers with Jacob.

    2. DailyBrad

      I feel like it’s more that talking it out helped both of them feel heard, plus he’s agreeing to meet her in the middle. With that, she’s got less to be upset with him about.

    3. Nymph

      Amazing what an understanding conversation can do.

  12. Cattleprod

    I would be very concerned if their next date ended with Mike punching Joe again.

    1. not someone else

      Honestly, I would seriously consider subscribing to their Patreon for a non-canon zombie uprising omake.

    2. MordWa

      Can we swap out zombie-Mike for Zombie-Reagan? I miss that guy.

      1. clif

        What about AI-Reagan?

  13. Dante

    GKHJ. Too wholesome, it’s going to kill me

  14. Risky

    Can you smell what she’s cooking, Joe?

  15. NGPZ

    Joyce was indeed successful, in her own cute, dorky way ^^ <3

  16. Taffy

    Wow, it only took a quick talk, just like I said. The amount of unearned smugness in my bones is melting the marrow and replacing it with solid hickory-smoked pork chop ore.

    1. Jeremiah

      It’s a good feeling.

    2. Schpoonman

      Mmmmm, meat ore.

      1. Taffy

        Ethically and sustainably sourced from the pro-union meat mines.

      2. Disastroid

        I’m told a meaty ore is what killed off the dinosaurs.

        1. Michael Steamweed

          Nah, some new studies have come out saying it was an ass-troid.

      3. Needfuldoer

        I’d mine some more but I’m out of adventures for the day. 🙁

  17. Dean

    Joe will have to get some flowers, and also a shovel.

  18. Ty34er

    She’s still over-correcting and at some point, it’s going to catch up with her.

    1. Jeremiah

      Have you thought that maybe she just want enjoy things she’s been told her entire life will send her to hell? And that’s not a bad thing?

      1. Kyrik Michalowski

        Excellent point. Considering how sheltered Joyce’s upbringing was I’m actually more surprised that she didn’t go completely overboard. She’s getting to enjoy things in her life that she never had the opportunity to experience, and she is enjoying new things. However she hasn’t gone of the deep end, and she has good people around her so I think she’ll be fine.

        1. Jeremiah

          Thanks you that’s exactly what I’m saying. It is literally what most teenagers do when they actually given some semblance of actual freedom, it just look more overt from Joyce due to how long she’s been repressed.

    2. Nymph

      God forbid someone have a little fun.

    3. Daibhid C

      Look, I’m a teetotal ace who’s so law-abiding it worries me that my local library has stopped bothering about overdue books. And even I’m thinking “You go, girl!”

    4. Michael Steamweed

      With a safe partner, flirting is a fun activity. You can copy what you’ve seen others do, but you can also feel safe to experiment and try new things.

  19. DailyBrad

    I am glad they talked it out, and that Joe’s sharing what he specifically wants here, too. It makes sense, given a lot of this is so new to him.

    Also, I wonder if they’re ever going to carry out their threat- err, promise, Joyce and Dorothy, of a double-date. Given Joe and Walky’s personalities, that’d be good for some laughs.

    1. Taffy

      There’s at least one fanfic exploring that scenario.

  20. AbacusWizard

    Dumbing of Age, Book 17: So Fun You’ll Forget You’re Not Doing Crimes

  21. two-star

    A sexy shower, with sexy milk-jug boots.

    1. Jesse

      Ohhh, fuck yeahh, wear those sexy mipk-jugs on your slutty feet, mmmmm…

      1. Jesse

        *milk – I couldn’t spell, ’cause I was thinking about the sexy repurposed plastic footwear *droool*.

      2. Taffy

        Don’t go inviting them in.

      3. Aura

        Now I feel like I need a shower >.<

  22. Drain

    The joejoyce we want and the JoeJoyce we deserve ?

  23. Jesse

    Are they gonna “Weekend at Bernie’s” Mike with them?

  24. Anon A Mouse

    Yet another example of how the world is a better place with Mike dead.

    1. Jesse

      ?

  25. Cmd1095

    Ah the autistic struggle of not being able to properly control one’s face, I know it well. Though for me it’s less eyebrow control and more my mouth. I can’t smile on demand, at all, or frown on demand. I’ve got no input on my expression and whenever I try it goes about as well as this is for Joyce XD

    1. davus

      can you control the individual muscles?

      1. davus

        wait, you kind of answered that, I guess. (making expressions manually is hard.)

      2. Cmd1095

        So I can sort of control the individual muscles to an extent, but the end result of manually smiling makes me look like I’m from the movie “Smile” and it’s very unsettling even to me lol

    2. NGPZ

      Yeah i feel this, it’s also why i found forced smiles like Becky’s rather… unsettling.

      Like how do you even do that? T_T

      1. Michael Steamweed

        Too often our deliberate, forced, unfelt smile looks more like “The Cage” Spock trying to blend in.

      2. Amós Batista

        The smilling struggle is so real… That’s why I prefer making selfies always with a serious face.

    3. zee

      Oh I didn’t know lack of control over facial muscles was an autistic thing, that’s interesting! So much of the experience is about how we receive information, the more physical symptoms are interesting to me.

      I never had that, I’m more of a “practicing fake smiles in the mirror for masking purposes” kinda gal. I do struggle to keep my forehead relaxed though, maybe that’s something. The subtle feeling and visual difference of my hooded eyelids drives me crazy so I constantly have my eyebrows raised, and it’s starting to give me wrinkles .-.

      1. Yumi

        Very same, from the practicing fake smiles in the mirror to the wrinkles forming by eyebrows (though in my case it’s that’s my eyebrows are often scrunched without me realizing it when I’m alone and feeling stressed, which is pretty much anytime I’m driving).

      2. Cmd1095

        Yeah I don’t know if it’s a universal thing, but it is a trend I’ve noticed among neurodivergent people. I imagine that like most autism symptoms, it’s a spectrum and not everyone has it equally

  26. shrub

    I find it interesting how others like to treat Joyce like she’s a little kid yet she’s navigating her first real relationship really well and Joe is doing a great job as well

    I’d especially like Dorothy and Sarah to take note of how Joyce is doing, they’d both learn a thing or two

    1. shrub

      Walky could also learn from Joe as well

  27. Queezle

    awwww these two did so well!
    Now someone needs to hunt down Mary and throw her into the sun.

    1. Mark

      Ugh, sudden premonition: Mary’s going to find a way to tattle to Joyce’s mother, Dad gets drawn in, and the parents make a big scene…at the Fountain, no less.

  28. Waffliesinyoface

    i want this date to go super well and i want it to be sweet and heartwarming and i FIRMLY expect that i will go “d’aawwwwww” while reading it

    which is very ironic given my current malaya avatar, god dangit malaya

    1. Michael Steamweed

      Malaya hates the fakey stuff. But maybe just possibly maybe Joyce and Joe are being authentic and not-fakey? Malaya might approve in a “meh” accepting way? (i dunno, i’m reaching on this one.)

      1. Emperor Norton II

        Malaya hates other people’s fakey. She is perfectly fine with her own fakeyness.

      2. Mturtle7

        My gut feeling is that, after spending more than a minute watching Joyce/Joe interact, Malaya would reluctantly acknowledge that their romance is probably genuine, simply because she would find it too weird and stupid to possibly be faked. However, because they’re single at the moment, they would also BURN with seething envy at how sickeningly sweet the relationship is, and thus complain loudly about the whole thing ANYWAY.

        …Or wait, IS Malaya single at the moment? I can’t remember off the top of my head how their whole thing with Marcie resolved, if at all.

  29. Suet

    I mean, as long as you don’t eat at Galasso’s again, he would never have to stare at Conquest… Taco Bell, then?

    Sorry, Joyce, you’d be more able to wiggle your ears than waggle your eyebrows.

  30. Chase

    God damn, is the hovertext a reference to Mike??

    1. Kyrik Michalowski

      Survey says: Yes.

  31. Bogeywoman

    I found out only a couple days ago that my sister can wiggle her eyebrows like Jim Carrey cos she was obsessed with him as a kid. I’ve been trying to figure out how to do it and I just look like I’m having a stoke

    1. Taffy

      So you’re doing it properly?

    2. Daibhid C

      I spent far too much time trying to raise a single eyebrow sardonically like Mr Spock or Lord Vetinari. Never managed it.

      1. Michael Steamweed

        I learned I could do the Spock eyebrow when I first watched TOS. I can also switch raised brows from side to side quickly. Can do the tongue curl thing, too. Yay for useless genetic quirks.

    3. Segnosaur

      I can move both my eyebrows independently. I can also move my ears and flair my nostrils.

      I have a very talented head.

      1. Michael Steamweed

        Can ya do the tongue curl thing?

  32. DorJoJo

    They are so cute and i love them and i really really want their date to work out and not turn into an argument or problem because they are great and i am CONSTANTLY WORRIED they’ll break up

  33. Da Boy

    Crisis Averted! May they date and prosper!

    1. Michael Steamweed

      As the Vulcans say, “Date long and prosper.” (shipping is logical; vulcans approve of infinite diversity in infinite combination)

  34. Acher4

    Ia Amber going to appear at the date, as her “suprise” third split personality: Mike…
    and start punching?
    😛

  35. Adept

    She’s still pressuring him to drink and get drunk. If anybody gets that into alcohol that quickly, I suspect trouble ahead.

    1. morleuca

      She’s collecting experiences. She wants to be drunk with someone as a couple.

      1. Mark

        Not unreasonable. It’s the “you owe me” that I find troubling. But this is new territory for her. Maybe in time she’ll learn that “aw, Joe, this is something I want to share with you” is a lot more appealing — at least, I would find it so.

        [except that my name isn’t Joe….]

    2. Taffy

      Yeah, he seems real torn up about it.

      1. thejeff

        Maybe not “torn up”, but definitely deflecting away from it. Like he did last time.
        I think it’s pretty clear he’s still not comfortable with the idea, for the reasons he gave in the last strip. Despite Joyce handwaving them away with “I’m not fragile.”

    3. Nymph

      Okay.

  36. ValdVin

    Joyce: “And the first step is putting on my shower stilts!” raises eyebrows provocatively.

    1. Michael Steamweed

      Mmm, oh, yeah, dirty sexy plastic jug shower stilts. A Rutten original!

  37. Mark

    Happy to learn that Joe thinks their truncated date was fun, regardless.

    1. Amelie Wikström

      I figure it was the most real thing that’s ever happened to him up to that point. Even with Mike’s presence skewing it towards unreality. He’s dwelled on it and decided it was fun, or at least fun is a safe word to describe it without getting too real.

    2. Segnosaur

      When Joe was referring to their first date being “real” and “fun”, I think he was emphasizing the “real” part rather than the “fun” part.

  38. MB

    They are growing up. Learning to communicate… to take a breath, a moment, and listen.

    1. Pseudowolf

      Ah, yes. As noted relationship councilor Robert Van Winkle says, they must “Stop, collaborate, and listen”

    2. Autogatos

      Yeah this is actually an example of a super healthy relationship imo.

      People in relationships always make mistakes. There’s no such thing as a perfect relationship because there’s no such thing as a perfect person.

      As someone who has been happily married for over a decade, I’ve found main difference between my current relationship and past ones isn’t whether or not we ever argue or disagree or make mistakes. It’s how we deal with it when those things happen. In unhealthy relationships, arguments don’t get resolved, resentments continue to build, people don’t learn from their mistakes and try to do better, etc. In a healthy relationship, arguments and mistakes will ideally lead to understanding each other better and ultimately strengthening the relationship.

  39. Drew

    This is where we find out that this is, in fact, a rehash of the Walkyverse, and everyone has been abducted by aliens and has powers they don’t know about.

  40. Yumi

    What are some of your favorite cute date ideas? I like going to the zoo, to a museum, to a local fair, or to a pottery painting place (though now that I do ceramics classes regularly, I have more than enough of my own pottery at home).

    1. NGPZ

      Having a picnic in a park

      Food court at a mall,

      Even just playing games with each other, either on the couch together or online

      One of my friends met their husband playing Minecraft together ^^

      1. Yumi

        I’ve never been on a date at a board game café, but that seems like it’d be fun. After I know the person a little, I’d also like library dates that are full of talking about books one’s read throughout their life.

    2. Taffy

      I usually go for the dinner and movie mainstay, but sometimes there’s a carnival of festival nearby. An out-of-town shopping trip is always a good time too, even when we only end up with like one thing.

      1. thejeff

        There are reasons dinner and a movie is a classic, even if it seems trite and unimaginative.

        1. Yumi

          One thing I don’t love about the standard format of that is that it seems to be dinner and then a movie, which I guess makes sense if the best time to meet starts around dinner time anyway, but I prefer the structure of a movie and then dinner. Then you can talk about the movie as a good starting point. But also, I don’t love going to the movies, so it wouldn’t be a top choice for me anyway.

        2. Jeremiah

          I am guessing it’s in part for not going to the movies hungry, I heard the snacks there can be pretty damn expensive.

        3. NGPZ

          especially given if they don’t got an arcade inside

          it’s because that’s literally how theaters make most of their money; the majority of ticket sale money goes to the people who actually make the movies

        4. Yumi

          Then you miss the fun of sneaking food into the theater, though!

        5. NGPZ

          I’ve legit never had to do that.

          Theaters I’ve been to in CA at least just don’t care

          and a good thing given certain people have to bring their own food for health/medical reasons.

        6. Taffy

          Anymore, employees anywhere aren’t allowed to stop you from doing anything. You could walk into the new Avengers movie and start jelqing in the front row, and they’d be powerless to stop you. It’s really fucked up.

        7. Yumi

          I still sneak my snacks in, out of respect.

    3. Jerach

      I haven’t really been on much in the way of dates but I think a farmer’s market and a walk in the park sounds really nice. Going for a short hike and getting ice cream after also sounds neat. I just generally really like going outside with people.

    4. Mark

      Bowling, mini golf, bicycling with a picnic lunch, a walk in a nice park with a picnic lunch. But movies are good too.

  41. BorkBorkBork

    The human part of me thinks this is warm, positive, healthy.

    The depraved writer side of me sees “simultaneous boozy times” as a loaded Chekhov’s gun.

    But that paranoid part of me sees guns everywhere. Like, everywhere.

    Hey, I wonder when Liz is going to swing by and see Sarah again. Maybe Joyce will invite her along to the next keg party.

    1. Jeremiah

      Often it’s good to turn off the trope seeking part of your brain, it often give false positives.

  42. Kyrik Michalowski

    The closer we get to Joe, and Joyce doing the horizontal tango the closer I get to selling my organs so I can pay for a slipshine account.

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