218

Chainsmoking
Posted on April 22, 2023 by David M Willis
FOUR days remain in the Dumbing of Age Book 12 Kickstarter! This book has 224 full-color pages and includes all five chapters of Year 12!  A foreword by Steve Horton!  24 bonus strips!  Strip commentary!  Character models!  Unused/rejected strips! Pledge today!

218 thoughts on “Chainsmoking”

  1. FaerwenOfValenwood

    At last all pieces have fallen into place. My OTP is no longer Joeyce; I now ship Asher and Walky.

    Walker? Ashy?

    1. cbwroses

      I like Ashy.
      Though Washer is also an option.
      And, of course, Bro-clones.

      1. Cattleprod

        Washer makes me want to figure out who would fit the ship name ‘Dryer’ and imagine them on a double date.

    2. Chris Phoenix

      Actually, I think this may be setting up Asher and Dorothy. The timing works – Dorothy is looking (for a Walky clone!) and Asher is about to be. We’ve had several strips establishing that Asher and Walky are similar. Dorothy, in the middle of reexamining her life trajectory, is probably about ready to make a bad personal choice and double down on it.

      I’m not sure how serious I am. It depends on what kind of dumbing Willis wants to get into next. But now that I’ve thought it, I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s actually in the buffer. I mean, in the cards. You know, whatever. Eat at Arby’s.

      1. Archieve

        Man, that’s going to be awkward at Radiahs next meeting(all of her interacting feels like meetings not hangouts) if Asher shows up with Dorothy.

        1. Mark

          That would be fun.

          But I think Dorothy would be disappointed, if she decides to rebel with Asher. I get the feeling that Asher has outgrown his Bad Boy phase and wants to shed his past. So they might be in the same place but going in opposite directions. Seems like a match that would fail before it started.

        2. cbwroses

          I doubt Dorothy would mess with Asher.
          I’m not even sure she knows who Asher is.
          But if the reason we’re speculating that she’d mess with him is because he reminds her of Walky, that’s the farthest away from a Bad Boy you can get.

      2. JR

        That sounds awfully plausible. If that’s the plan, it’s been really nicely breadcrumbed. It would mean that Dorothy spent all that time telling Joyce that Joe was no good only to jump into a relationship with someone who is, while charming, an accomplice to her own kidnapping and potential murder.

        That would definitely be a dark turn for Dorothy, but she’s in a place of discomfort right now that could potentially be fertile soil for a bad decision that kicks off a journey that resolves her current crisis.

        1. cbwroses

          That’s only a dark turn for the readers as Dorothy would have no idea, and so the irony would only be for us and not something she could reflect on.
          It wouldn’t even be a good parallel because she thought Joyce was only liking Joe due to horniness and that she should know better both due to what they both know about Joe.
          Dorothy doesn’t know anything negative about Asher, assuming she even knows who he is, so the idea that she could know better doesn’t exist.

        2. thejeff

          Until she inevitably finds out about it – which would probably be pretty soon given how many others around her know.

        3. FaerwenOfValenwood

          I mean, I still think Walky and Asher are made for each other but I do like the idea of Asher and Dorothy getting together for maximum drama all around. That way we can have Relationship Drama We Crave on one corner and Perfectly Happy Honeymoon Couple Joeyce on the other (pretty please Willis just let those two be happy together pleeease)

      3. Techhead

        If Dorothy dates Asher, does that mean that at some point down the line Amber is gonna date him too? Amber already thinks he’s hot

      4. Seregiel

        Asher and Lucy for maximum room mate drama.

      5. Vanessa

        Oh no! Could happen!

    3. Wereg

      Waasher!

    4. Decidedly Orthogonal

      Really? Nobody? Clearly Faerwen is…

      Wishy Washy

  2. Ana Chronistic

    so, they’re sexy losers

    1. Ana Chronistic

      (NSFW)

    2. Alexander Krizak

      Dang, that comic is nearly twenty years old, and I read it back when it was current. Thank you for today’s reminder of the terrifying passage of time.

      1. Rose by Any Other Name

        Right there with you.
        The latest issue of that comic is from 2023… I had no idea it was ongoing.

        1. Decidedly Orthogonal

          Yup, it’s still coming. And Clay is still hard… at work, pumping out faptastic comics.

        2. Gilthwixt

          The fact that it’s so old but also ongoing and yet I’ve never heard of it before just makes me want to go on one of my rants about Webcomic discoverability and /r/webcomics vs /r/manga culture again.

        3. Aura

          I would like to hear this rant

  3. Doctor_Who

    Okay, so, theory time.

    Walky and Sal share like 99% of their DNA, but Sal is a cool aloof badass and Walky is a goofball. And Sal smokes.

    Asher WAS a cool aloof badass, but now he’s a goofball…because he quit smoking!

    My god, all the old movies were right. Smoking really DOES make you cool!

    1. Sirksome

      The problem is that we’ve actually misunderstood Sal from the start. She’s never been as cool and aloof as she appears. She’s much closer to Walky, as she’s actually a flower loving choir girl who just happens to smoke and own a motorcycle. Have you seen the dork she’s dating? These cool types are just nerds in disguise! Jen’s just now noticing.

      1. Thag Simmons

        I think it’s more like thinking someone wearing a suit of armour is really cool and hot, but finding them no longer appealing once they’re comfortable putting their defenses down around you.

        1. Dana

          I know I’m taking you too literally, but it’s like how all the people I met when masking was universal turned out to have less attractive chins than I initially thought.

        2. Thag Simmons

          Eh, it’s the same core thing, people’s initial presentation not being completely representative of them in other circumstances.

        3. Ari

          Also the sheer number of them that turned out to have incredibly ugly facial hair.

      2. Doctor_Who

        Maybe she’s smoking less now to have nice breath for Danny (no need to do that when she was with Asher since he smoked too), which is causing her natural dorkishness to reassert itself.

        1. cbwroses

          Sal and Asher never dated, tho, at least that’s what he told Jennifer.
          Plus they were 13 then and many young teens don’t go beyond liking someone at that age (or in Walky’s case, never even liked anyone romantically until they were in College).

        2. Thag Simmons

          Walky’s probably on point with his analysis here

        3. cbwroses

          Asher isn’t even sure if they have history.

          https://www.dumbingofage.com/2021/comic/book-11/05-as-long-as-its-free/capitalh/

        4. Vanessa

          Asher seems genuinely nice most of time…. Dorothy could totally fall for him. It might work out if he gets tired of hanging out with the mean kids and the cheerleader.

      3. RowenMorland

        Jen running into Sal* right now would be pretty amusing.

        *Maybe Sal is wearing a butt tacco shirt for some reason?

      4. Needfuldoer

        [Malaya yells out the window]

        “HA! FAKEY!”

      5. Kelibath

        Honestly, I see it almost exactly the reverse way – it’s as if being cool was being who you are unapologetically the whole time, rather than one superficial version of vibing people have to live up to? Dorks are cool by default, say…

        Sal’s definitely got some degree of boundary armour going on though so maybe it’s a stretch to assume she, Asher and others are there yet.

    2. Hoboturtle

      My theory is a bit of the reverse.

      Walky would be more like Sal if it wasn’t for Jennifer.

      1. Thag Simmons

        So she’s got a sort of natural dork energy that makes people in proximity to her into bigger dorks overtime?

        I can see it.

        1. Steve C

          I was thinking that Jennifer was still as toxic as Billie, but I like this theory better.

    3. thakoru

      They’re fraternal twins, they share the same amount of DNA as any other pair of siblings.

      1. Dr. Sharks

        Which, to be fair, is still “most of it”. 99% is probably underselling it by a lot.

        1. milu

          by about an order of magnitude, in fact. all humans have about 99.9% of their genome in common.

        2. tunasammich

          Yeah, I thought that was the joke haha

    4. Pylgrim

      I thought that the theory was going to be that by dating a Sal-like man, Jennifer would be purposefully choosing a sort of anti-Walky path in a desperate attempt to convince herself that she’s not now attracted to the kid she spent her childhood looking down on.

  4. Caro

    (‘after you get what you want, you don’t want it’ starts playing in the background)

    1. cbwroses

      ? You got what you wanted, but you lost what you had ?

      (Not the same song, I know)

      1. Lumino

        I know the song you’re referencing, but my thoughts still went to “Friends on the Other Side” first.

        What can I say? Disney knows catchy music.

        1. cbwroses

          Yep.
          I don’t think Raidah is as smooth as the Shadow Man, tho.
          But if she actually sounds like Keith David, I’ll like her more.

  5. Yotomoe

    I guess if he was a Chainsmoker he and Jennifer would be a little Closer.

    😛

    1. True Survivor

      Well played.

    2. Derek

      btw Yotomoe, are you aware Imgur is taking down all the porn content? You should back up your comic, it would be a shame to lose it

      1. Yotomoe

        I am aware 😛 I have it all on my computer and a friend downloaded a lot of my stuff anyway just in case.
        There’s a good chance they’ll miss my galleries though. Fun Fact: I still have a NSFW tumblr up that hasn’t been taken down after all these years.

    3. Thag Simmons

      I mean your relationship not resembling that song is probably a good thing, it’s not going to work out for those kids, they clearly broke up for a reason.

      1. Yotomoe

        True but part of me finds it romantic in a trashy “we’re broke and like each other well enough” kinda way. Hard to describe it but I kinda root for the couples that feel doomed or just in that casual level of mediocrity.

        1. Thag Simmons

          It’s literally “we dated a bit years ago and it sucked, but we saw each other across the bar and really dug the vibe”. Not a good relationship, but not a bad tune either, of the songs I’ve listened to with the title “Closer” it’s comfortably my second favourite.

    4. Bo

      god fucking damnit

  6. DarkoNeko

    …what the hell, Jennie.

    1. Bryy

      This basically screams she just wants a Male Ruth.

  7. BBCC

    Welp, time to pick up a new one, I guess! XD

    (Please don’t actually pick up a new one).

    1. Doctor_Who

      Dating Jennifer is probably unhealthy enough that it filled the void nicely.

  8. NGPZ

    Walky’s ADHDemon Power only grows!!! ✌️?

    *plays “Comedian Gallop” by Vassil Kazandjiev on passing car radio*

  9. RassilonTDavros

    Dumbing of Age Book 13: It’s Actually Quite Hard To Brood Without a Debilitating Substance Addiction!

  10. Jamie

    “I thought I was fixing you!” “I’m fixed?” “UNFIX!”

  11. Sirksome

    Brooding’s not that hard. Just sit around imagining your favorite anime fights and people will think you’re brooding.

    1. Doctor_Who

      Am I doing it right?

      1. NullSet

        yes

    2. Archieve

      But that would be NERD brooding, Jennifer wants cool brooding.

  12. newlland(Henryvolt)

    Obviously Jennifer there’s more too a person than that one thing, Asher has layers this is one of them when you look deeper.

    1. cbwroses

      Asher has layers, but Jennifer is the one acting like an ogre (and also has an onion booty, but that’s neither here nor there).

      1. TulipKitten

        Her booty has layers?

        1. cbwroses

          It has layers of clothing you want to peel off and it’s shaped so nicely that it brings tears to your eyes.

    2. True Survivor

      I think Jennifer knows that, she’s just upset and, therefore, not really thinking. She has tried very hard to get in with what she sees as the cool crowd and now they all seem to either like Walky better or that Walky was cool all along and her work was for nothing.

      Jennifer struggles with being genuine. Despite all its many faults, at least her relationship with Ruth let her be herself. She didn’t have to be on display for anybody because it was secret – also a not inconsiderable percentage of that whole partnership was alcohol based so that helps.

      1. Lumino

        I find it kind of weird that Malaya rides Sal’s ass for being fake, but she’s never really interacted with Billie (or Jennifer, for that matter).

        Feel like she’d have a field day with her.

        1. True Survivor

          I was think the same thing… Though Malaya does excel at missing (or drastically misinterpreting) the obvious… hmmmm

        2. Thag Simmons

          I think everything Malaya says about Sal is a confession. They’re more similar than either would like to admit.

      2. newlland(Henryvolt)

        The moral of the lesson is simple…Stop trying so hard to be cool.

    3. Yotomoe

      Ashers are like onions.

  13. Thag Simmons

    An awful family is a pretty viable substitute for brooding, and we know Asher’s got that covered.

    1. cbwroses

      Actually, we know Asher’s family does awful things.
      They might be great as a family (at least until they find out you stole from them).

      1. C.T. Phipps

        Until proven otherwise, I’m assuming that Asher’s grandfather knows he stole the money and is just looking the other way.

        1. Thag Simmons

          My suspicion is that Asher might have had to come clean during the timeskip. We know Sal was only allowed her motorcycle because the Dean was looking the other way, and guess who suddenly had a motorcycle post-timeskip.

        2. Needfuldoer

          Is Asher a freshman? I thought the “no vehicles on campus” rule only applied to first-year students.

        3. cbwroses

          I assumed they were the same age.
          Though at least someone in their group was older when they were robbing stores since someone was driving.
          That is unless they were simply driving illegally.

        4. Thag Simmons

          Asher and Sal are the same age

        5. cbwroses

          Then he should be punished, not rewarded.

      2. newlland(Henryvolt)

        There had to be a reason he chose to walk away from the family business in the first place.

        1. cbwroses

          That reason doesn’t have to be “my family is awful as a family.”

        2. Thag Simmons

          No, but given the themes of this comic it probably is.

  14. Audkitten

    I don’t like Asher but man he doesn’t deserve this. Jennifer needs something but I don’t know what. Therapy? A swift kick to the butt? Something to make her realize this is not okay behaviour.

    1. DailyBrad

      I mean, I’m pretty sure Jennifer was getting therapy and maybe still is, but I’m beginning to think her biggest issue was that Asher was probably a rebound after Ruth, timing-wise, and that maybe she is reaching the expiration date on that.

      1. Bryy

        YUP.

    2. Illjwamh

      Considering how insightful she can be in other areas, it’s weird that the one thing she’s never been able to grasp is that “cool” is a state of being, not a presentation.

      1. Archieve

        It’s because she’s all about presentation and her idea of cool is looking better compared to others.

      2. justin8448

        We the readers know that Sal is the one who truly understands cool. And not because she presents as stereotypically cool, but because of the advice she gave Joyce: Be 100% your truest self, and own that.

        I suspect Jennifer would be very confused by the concept and dismiss it out of hand.

        Partly because Jennifer actually being true to who she is would involve admitting to everyone that she’s kind of a complete wreck right now. Jennifer is covering up a lot of issues and telling herself it’s all ok, because she’s one of the cool kids again.

  15. Axel

    was on the edge of my seat to see if ‘dilapidating’ was a typo or just a new word use for me

    1. Bo

      well dont leave us in suspense???

  16. not someone else

    Wow. Jerk.

    She really is just dating him because it “looks cool”. Poor guy.

    1. True Survivor

      I don’t know, but I don’t think that is the *whole* reason why she chose him. I think she is likely upset that Walky seems to be effortlessly integrating into the group she scraped and crawled to cementer herself in. Now Walky is taking over her boyfriend, too.

    2. Lily

      truly ‘cool’ ppl don’t care if they look silly even if they don’t dress too ridiculous on purpose. i can totally see a lot of ‘non walky’ type guys dress like him and asher. unless you live in Australia (which i’m sure has its fair share of cold days too) it’d be hard not to own a hoodie

    3. Yotomoe

      Asher is a FASHION for her.

      1. angel

        arm candy would be a phase she’d have to grow out of. unless she is also independently rich as a free adult/from her parents to where she’d go to upper class ‘parties” and such and paid gigolo dates lol

  17. Qube

    surely this is a healthy mentality to have about a relationship. surely

    1. Lily

      being improved/’fixed’ and then moving on might help some ppl

  18. Suet

    Ah ah ah, Asher’s the complete opposite of a Nerdasaurus. Not quite the lovechild of Joyce and Sal, but still.

    “Good for thee, not for me”, I guess.

  19. DailyBrad

    Jennifer was the one who was liking that Ruth was sanding down her edges and getting more domestic, before Ruth put the breaks on it and torpedoed the relationship.

    I wonder a bit if Jennifer *wants* that kind of safety, but now she’s afraid of it because of what happened with Ruth. Of course, there’s also the bigger issue that she has it in her head that she has to be Cool, and is way too image-conscious, and Asher is reminding her too much of Walky for comfort. That Walky, even if he was being buttered up by Raidah, was still more socially graceful at the breakfast than she was also has Jennifer that much more image-conscious because she’s coming off a humiliation.

    I kind of wonder how into Asher she was to begin with, and how much of it was a rebound that is reaching an expiration date.

    1. Bryy

      That mixed with a healthy dose of internalized homophobia.

  20. Dara

    Jennifer really is only into trainwrecks, isn’t she.

    1. Dot

      Difference is this is a trainwreck entirely of Billie’s making.

    2. Wizard

      Being the “alpha-bongo problem solver” is a big chunk of her identity. With no immediate problem to solve, she tends to go a little haywire. Sorta like the emotional equivalent of an auto-immune disorder.

    3. DailyBrad

      Initially, though she also was really into Ruth when she thought things were going well. So, being a mess is a good in, but she doesn’t need it to stay.

  21. Adam Black

    I wanted to date Sal, not Walky.

    1. Lily

      even sal isn’t all ‘cool’ /has layers to her lol

    2. Yotomoe

      Easy mistake, they look so similar.

  22. Lily

    should’ve dated a goth/emo then, jennifer. tho i’m sure there are cheery goths lol

  23. HueSatLight

    Does he know anyone who’s going to be murdered? That could help with the brooding. Maybe after Jennifer tells him Amazi-girl is Sal.

  24. Mancuso

    Am I wrong or have the last couple of months bee all about making us want to punch Billie in the throat?

    1. AeromechanicalAce

      I’ve wanted to do that since day 1, She’s just Awful.

  25. Dday

    See, what Asher needs to do is go back to smoking, ride his motorcycle more and sleep with lots of other women. Right now he’s acting like a total nerd.
    (Also Jenny totally wants to kiss Walky, that’s clearly what this is all about lets just be open about it)

    1. Lily

      surely they can’t all be broody lol, i mean, other than hating it and struggling to kick the addiction, while it is bad for you, i’d think ppl would be in a good mood after a cigarette , like how there’s a ‘cigarette after sex’ kinda , well, ‘meme’, isn’t exactly the right word but ppl know what i mean, right?

      1. Wizard

        Well, nicotine is a mild stimulant, so yes. (Most of the health risks from cigarettes come from the tar and other combustion by-products. Nicotine is basically the least dangerous thing in tobacco smoke.) Both the stimulation and relief from craving can be quite pleasant. Even just the ritual aspect of pulling out a cigarette and lighting up can be relaxing. Plus there’s the fellowship feeling as smoking has become more stigmatized and restricted.

  26. Dot

    Doesn’t take Freud to figure someone’s projecting.

  27. Nono

    Last panel Asher is VERY Walky, though.

    1. Amós Batista

      Asher looking exactly like him. I’m scared.

  28. Just an Armadillo

    I used to think that half the trouble with Billy was because of the codependent toxic relationship she was in. But now that she’s out of that relationship I’ve changed my mind. She just has zero redeemable features. Her previous shitty relationship was disguising just how awful she is by making me think they were bringing out the worst in each other. That excuse is gone, and all that’s left is a terrible person.

    1. Archieve

      Think the problem is that while Ruth is willing to admit to her past self being bad and needing to make real atonement, Jennifer just tries to rebrand and deny personal accountability, resulting in no real growth. Jennifer is being that one jerk who thinks because they “changed” they dont owe anybody an apology.

  29. Grayfinity

    Well, I guess there won’t be a next time. Seriously, wtf Jennifer?

  30. Steelbright

    Well, in good news, Asher is the most relatable he’s ever been

  31. Sam

    Ah yes, the crippling character flaw of… doing something your partner asks you to, sticking to that change, and even still, being a good partner through the change even though it was tough.

    And then he has the nerve to be HAPPY too.

    Got to throw this whole man away, he’s considerate, thoughtful, kind, respectful, AND listens, and Jennifer doesn’t want any of that.

    1. Archieve

      Sadly I think she got him to quit expecting relapses and arguing where she had the moral high ground.

  32. Slartibeast Button, BIA

    Shows the danger of thinking you can change someone. You can’t, and if you can, it may not be the way you intended…

    1. Archieve

      Doesn’t sound like she actually expected him to change, she apparently expected him remain grumpy and resentful with quiting. Sad that she still doesn’t think somebody can be truely happy quitting.

      1. Slartibeast Button, BIA

        Even worse, that means she’s manipulating him.

  33. SDRainbow

    I find myself feeling similar things about Jennifer that I did about Dorothy.

    Both are dealing with personal image versus reality issues. Both are being forced to confront the dissonances.

    Dorothy is…sort of…dealing with it, but Jennifer is full-on avoidance, and that makes me sad even though I don’t super like Jennifer as a character.

    1. Mark

      That does seem to be the theme of this chapter. Many characters are dealing with similar issues.

  34. Jess

    that is a ? from me

  35. Judas Peckerwood

    Actually, it’s not.

  36. Cmasta1992

    I know I’m usually Captain of the Jennifer Defense Squad but she is letting a semi awkward breakfast do way more damage than it should. You’ve carved out a nice life for yourself. It’s not perfect but by freshman year standards, she’s done well for herself advanced from the crazy abusive and toxic relationship she was previously in.

    Asher on the other hand continues to impress me.

    1. Bryy

      She’s literally in another abusive relationship, though. Raidah and her group are not good people.

      1. Thag Simmons

        I wouldn’t hang out with either Raidah or Karl, but “abusive relationship” is probably harsh, and we haven’t seen either Char or Chan post-Halloween.

        Raidah’s a weapons grade bongo but you’re getting what you signed up for with her, and Karl isn’t interesting enough to get an adjective before ‘person’.

        1. Needfuldoer

          I’m assuming they were jettisoned for being no longer useful.

        2. thejeff

          I assume they’re still hanging out with Raidah, but are kept away from Raidah’s current plot because they’re a bit too obvious.

      2. Cmasta1992

        They’re not people who I would personally associate with but they haven’t physically assaulted her or made a suicide pact with her so let’s dial it back

        1. DailyBrad

          We have seen them engage in manipulative behavior that is also abusive, though. Go back to when Billie meets Raidah’s group and becomes Jennifer. One of the very first things they do is hammer home that she’s got to lose weight. That’s honestly plenty fucked as it is.

        2. Owlmirror

          It’s not “they”, though — it’s Char. It’s only Char. Who is no longer dining with the group

        3. thejeff

          Raidah’s chat with Carl told us pretty explicitly that they’re only faking liking Jennifer and that they were going to do the same with Walky.

          stunted man child

  37. AGV

    What is she doing with her liiiiiiife??

  38. OnyxIdol

    Dump herrr

  39. DailyBrad

    I’m a little bit concerned she’s going to wind up relapsing and drinking, especially if it becomes her outlet to be Billie again on what she’d think were her own terms, which sucks because she was actually doing really well when she’d quit drinking, but hadn’t yet become repressed and constantly trying to pass herself off as Mature when it wasn’t the real her.

    1. Sajuuk-Khar

      This is a very healthy dear but I would posit that she is already Billie.

      1. Needfuldoer

        ??‍???‍?
        Always has been.

      2. DailyBrad

        She’s being more Billie than usual, yes, but she still is clinging to her “I’m mature now” aspects, so she’s basically getting the worse of both worlds minus the drinking.

        She really needs to reconcile her honest feelings more, closer to how she was at Halloween before Ruth chucked her out.

  40. Regret

    Dude, you deserve better.

    1. GholaHalleck

      And he’s had people murdered! Still deserves better.

  41. Karl Ruben

    I’m ashamed to admit that it took me this long to realise that Jennifer is basically the “honesty without kindness is just cruelty” axiom personified.

  42. Fel

    I don’t know if I ever particularly loved Jennifer, but she’s really becoming someone worth hating in the past several chapters, which feels a little weird considering how hard I was rooting for her and Ruth to find a healthy path forwards with their lives. I know she’s going through a lot, but it doesn’t take a legendary amount of self reflection to see that you’ve become a hypocritical jerk to your friends and loved ones. I hope Asher tries to follow this up somehow, but I don’t see him as the type to reach out after being pretty clearly rebuffed like this.

    1. Blue

      I think we’re getting set up for a spiral and redemption arc from Jennifer which I would quite enjoy actually.

    2. DailyBrad

      I love Billie, but Jennifer? Not really, no. Entirely too fake.

      1. Joshua Kronengold

        Well, yes, but they’re the same person, so.

        I think it’s clear at this point what Billie/Jennifer needs:

        Therapy.

        Not a new relationship, not a sudden life realization, and definately not meditation. Therapy. Honestly I think head-straight Billie and head-straight Ruth are an OTP, but they’d have to both be healthy, and one of them so isn’t.

  43. foducool

    welp, if there’s any sign this relationship is toxic as hell, this is it

  44. StClair

    aw, I was kind of hoping for the gasp-awake-and-sit-up-in-bed (or as TV Tropes calls it, Catapult Nightmare).

  45. Sajuuk-Khar

    Yes, yes, Billie totally sucks, let’s get that out of the way, you know what I want to see from this?

    I want to see Asher go to Ruth for relationship advice, because it would be fucking hilarious. Can you imagine? God, it’d be even better if they became friends over that lmaoooooo

    1. CrazyJ

      Actually I was thinking Asher might go to Walky for relationship advice since he’s known her since childhood.

      1. DailyBrad

        Yeah, I feel like that’s more likely.

  46. Doopyboop

    The only good thing about this situation, is that Asher is someone that seems to have a lot of self-respect. He recognized that his family situation wasn’t good, and tried to leave it (results vary on how successful he was), and I do think he will remember this and try to talk to Jennifer about it.

    I also have to admit, after Jennifer’s little “we’re all SO mature now, and we’re ALL settling down now!!” condescending as fuck conversation with Sal, seeing her have this melt down is a little… gratifying? Jennifer really thought all she had to do was get with some guy, put in a coat of ‘acting like a mature adult’, and that would be all the work she’d need to do for the rest of her life. Sorry, Jennifer; being a better person takes a lot more work than that.

    1. Archieve

      She says she wants to grow up but what she really wants is to be the popular girl dating the cool stoic guy. That and She’s spent all of her days thinking Walkys happy goofy attitude beneath her so she really hates the implication that being like him is what getting better can look like.

      1. Doopyboop

        Kinda like the idea that being happy is over-rated/childish. Which I could definitely see Jennifer internalizing. She has a very difficult time letting herself actually be happy. Like, if there’s a situation where things are calm and stable, she just doesn’t like/trust it, there has to be SOMETHING toxic or dramatic or it isn’t real/good enough.

        1. Archieve

          Drama is very much still what she lives for. Things have been calm in her life, Sal has moved on from caring about her relationship and Walky doesnt need her help fitting in so she’s creating her own drama now.

  47. poofdepoof

    An enemy of Billie is my friend? Feeling more sympathetic to Asher than ever now

  48. Dr. T

    Jeebus, Jennifer! Get legitimate, professional help!

    1. Adept

      But she won’t. I don’t think she has processed anything in her entire, entitled life.

  49. Hazel

    Actually, I find it quite easy to brood. Unless we count the coffee as debilitating.

    1. ValdVin

      I know! Asher can have brooding now without emphysema at 40.

  50. Needfuldoer

    Shallow as a damp spot where a puddle used to be.

  51. Superducked

    Again.

    “Next time i see you, you’d better be brooding!”

    Don’t worry, you’re not gonna see me again.

    Done.

  52. GUIGUI

    Guys?… I am starting to think Jennifer might be a bad influence on Asher…

  53. GUIGUI

    Anyway, I didn’t want to empathise with Asher, but here we are.

  54. RacingTurtle

    It’s like the ghost of Mike told Asher “you’ve been free of your grandfather for awhile, you’re comfortable with the new girlfriend, why not explore your goofy side?” Just to watch the disaster from beyond.

    Jennifer’s issues have issues

  55. Sombrero

    Jennifer should date Malaya. You read it here first.

    1. timemonkey

      Jennifer is WAY too fakey for Malaya.

      1. Sombrero

        Malaya can deactivate any amount of fakey, she’s immune to it.

  56. Allison Branford

    Sounds like a win for Healthy Jennifer!

  57. fy

    i just think it’s sad that he seems to genuinly care about her, and she obviously just sees him as a stereotype/symbol. the girl he’s in love with doesn’t care about him as a person at all.

    1. Zaxares

      Yeah, I find it kinda hilarious actually. XD A couple months back it feels like everybody was “Stay away from Asher, Jennifer! He’s a killer!” and now it’s like “Asher, stay away from Jennifer! She’s a toxic partner!”

  58. goggleman64

    Wow, Jenn, is the newspaper hosting a “Worst Partner on Campus” contest?

  59. Yeet

    I thought Dorothy handled the equivalent t-shirt/clothing situation somewhat poorly at best but Jennifer is going for broke.
    I think one of the things nearly everyone in this comic is going to learn in college is that screaming at/embarrassing/insulting partners about their clothes is a bad idea.

  60. Bruh

    Me, yesterday: I mean, I don’t think she’s actually serious. Right…?

    Me, today: Down with Jennifer! Asher, find your freedom!

    1. Adept

      For sure. Nothing is worth this.

  61. Adept

    Jennifer continues to be absolute human garbage. Is this rock bottom yet, or can she sink lower?

  62. PhyrexianRogue

    Jennifer is building an odd streak of ‘befriend person, make them do self-improvement, then unfriend the improved version for their improvements’

  63. HueSatLight

    I’m sure when Asher’s ghost* said “debilitating substance addiction” that doesn’t tie into Jennifer’s problems at all.

    *because worst person in the strip Jennifer murdered him with frostbite yesterday. Clearly there’s nothing good about her since it wasn’t in the last few strips, and she’s not just being dramatic because she’s frustrated.

  64. wakeangel2001

    Billie, fixes people then hates them for not being broken…

  65. Calibus

    I hate ‘Jennifer’ so much.

    1. Decidedly Orthogonal

      If it’s any consolation, I think Ms. Billingsworth does too. Sadly she fails to realize why she’s committed to being horrible. Then again, maybe the awful among us really are just awful. That would sure explain my ex.

  66. Blue

    Jennifer’s obviously not coping well but I for one am very interested to see how this arc unfolds.

  67. John

    Jeebus Asher, dump her ass right now! MASSIVE red flags.

  68. davidbreslin101

    THis is a prime example of Walkinisation: the tendancy of life-forms to evolve into Walky.

    1. Needfuldoer

      I’m just thankful that (so far) this actually was a coincidence, and he wasn’t setting Walky up somehow.

      1. Jodka

        Same! I’d be stoked if Asher turned out to be really nice dude who reformed himself.

    2. Thomas

      I’m pretty sure Walky is the Primordial Ooze all creatures evolved out from. Which is to say the current Walky is a throwback.

  69. Dave

    Haha, you basically dated Walky

    1. Roe

      literally lol

  70. Kazuma Taichi

    Ah, so Jennifer’s turn-on really is toxicity

    1. Seregiel

      I think it’s specifically aggression. She was hoping for irritability.

  71. J. Steven York

    Never thought I’d be saying this but, “Asher, you could do better…”

  72. The Jighole Man

    this may piss some people off but, im glad Ruth got out of that relationship.

    Ruth wants someone to be happy with, Jennifer wants someone to be miserable with. (from what i can tell)

    1. Jodka

      It shouldn’t piss anyone off. Billie is literally the worst and Ruth recognized that she was enabling her. Ruth deserves better.

  73. Joshua Kronengold

    “I started dating an edgy guy, but then I made him stop smoking and now he’s not edgy enough for me, the Jennifer Billingsworth Story” is my new terrible biopic title.

  74. Liliet

    OK this is pretty hilarious

  75. HueSatLight

    I’m still a Billie-ver : )

  76. MoreWLessG

    Billie cementing herself, once again, as the biggest butt in the story. Man, I really cannot enough say how much I dislike her.

    1. Jodka

      Hard agree

  77. Roe

    I have to keep reminding myself what asher did

    1. shoopdawhoop

      He quit smoking.

  78. shoopdawhoop

    “I can change him”
    …
    “Oh no, I changed him”

  79. Thomas

    We expected Asher to be bad news for Jennifer. Turns out it’s the other way around. Well played, Mr. Willis.

  80. Call Me Deacon Blues

    Holy shit. She started dating Sal, and now she’s dating Walky. This… this makes sense

  81. Ragingagnostic

    I’m absurdly reminded of a scene from “Brigadoon”. Tommy Albright asks his friend Jeff Douglas what happened between Jeff and his girlfriend. Jeff states that his girlfriend always complained about Jeff’s drinking. So Jeff quit drinking. After that, he and his girlfriend suddenly had nothing to talk about so they split.

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