270

Tearin’
Posted on May 7, 2017 by David M Willis

270 thoughts on “Tearin’”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    C

    for

    COMMON GROUND

    …

    also for “crap in a bucket, we screwed”

    1. Ana Chronistic

      I’m picturing Walky with FWEEP hair and that nice shirt and dang, draw time

    2. Remmington Steele

      I C what you did there.

    3. Hinoron

      76/100 is a “C”?

      You know, I only ever went to one school that used letter grades, my Jr. high. I never saw them anywhere else but in media. It’s literally taken me decades to get the hint that my school may have been using the letters differently than other schools did. It’s always presented as though they’re universal values, agreed upon by all, and apparently that isn’t so.
      In retrospect, that vagueness of interpretation is probably why all the other schools I ever went to stuck to grading by percentages.

      FYI, this is how my Jr. high broke it down.
      A+ = 100-90%
      A = 89-80%
      B = 79-70%
      C = 69-60%
      D = 59-50%
      F (failure) = <50%

  2. Doctor_Who

    I’m beginning to think this is just what Walkertons do when they sense danger.

    1. Kris

      It’s their evolutionary advantage.

    2. Kernanator

      It’s like how cats arch their backs to make themselves look bigger.

      1. Chris

        Imagine a porcupine.

        1. SgtWadeyWilson

          Is this part of the test?

        2. Doctor_Who

          Shit, I imagined a hedgehog. Do you think that’s close enough that I’ll still get credit?

          I got a C?!

          FWEEP!

        3. Haven

          No, it means you’re a replicant.

        4. Chris

          Partial credit! Porcupines use theirs when they are shocked, like Wally uses his hair curls

        5. Needfuldoer

          You do, provided it’s not a strange, talking, blue hedgehog.

        6. Dean

          If the blue hedgehog is repenting before a cross, it’s an auto-fail.

        7. SgtWadeyWilson

          Is my grade negative if I imagine a white, psychic hedgehog from the future?

        8. Ana Chronistic

          THE NEGATIVEST

  3. General Tekno

    So the hair thing is genetic, then.

    1. Emperor Daniel

      We’ve seen Walky’s hair go poof before.

      (waits with baited, and also bated, breath for someone to post a link to the strip in question)

      1. Chris

        http://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-5/02-threes-a-crowd/congrats/

        I’ve got you covered Daniel

        1. Gespenst

          you’re the hero we need & hopefully deserve, chris

        2. Chris

          Worship hours begin at midnight Saturday. 😉

        3. Steve Charb

          willis drew this one better

  4. Emperor Daniel

    “YOUR HAIR!”
    “MY HAIR!”
    “IT GOES UP AGAIN!”
    “IT GOES UP AGAIN!

    . . . except not as light-hearted.

    1. Yumi

      Thank you for this reference.

    2. Carms

      Appreciated

    3. Annika

      Gunnerkrigg Court <3

    4. fishie

      Well played

  5. Chris

    I would love if my hair did that instinctively

    1. Leorale

      Many people have hair like that, but it’s more of a humidity thing.

  6. Kris

    Is that some kind of Walkerton specific genetic trait?

  7. newllend(henryvolt)

    Aye now they’ve both hit rock bottom.

  8. Fallingivy

    I love their relationship so much.

  9. Carms

    I LOVE DOROTHY SO MUCH. SHE IS SO GOOD.

    1. -Sentinel-

      Yes. She’s the best person in this comic. Not necessarily the best character, which is another thing entirely. But the best person.

  10. Valerie

    I thought it was mentioned before that Walky’s hair was naturally straighter than Sal’s? It was listed as one of the reasons that he’s “whiter” and so the parents subconsciously like him better?

    Plus I can’t really see Walky straightening his hair every morning.

    1. Austyn

      I could def see it being less curly than Sal’s, and maybe easier to gel down as oppose to needing straightening? Not sure the official specs on Walky’s hair though

      1. thejeff

        Well, judging by the previous “fweep!”, his does just scrunch back into its normal form without requiring chemical murdering.

        So there is some difference at least. Probably not just that his is shorter either.

    2. Carms

      That’s just how bad this is

    3. Doctor_Who

      Walky isn’t the most hygienic person, so maybe it’s like that joke in Futurama where Fry is offered hair gel and said he makes his own, then sticks back his hair with no effort.

      I mean, Walky must basically secrete McNugget grease.

      1. 3oranges

        Secreting grease sounds unpleasant, but it would be a way you could eat a lot without gaining weight.

        1. Chris

          Called acne. It swells to overproduce oils, and if you pressure it right, you can get it to secrete those oils.

        2. Austyn

          Acne is more when oil glands get blocked and trap oil inside the skin (can be from overproduction or other things) and often causes infection.

        3. Chris

          That’s why you have to attempt removing the oils. It can leave thin scarring though.

    4. BBCC

      Walky’s hair curls upon shock, just like Sal’s. But it is naturally straight (unless it’s very short) and when it does curl, he can simply smooth it over with his hand, unlike Sal who has to spend time, money, and effort to relax her’s.

      1. Austyn

        that makes more sense tbh

        1. BBCC

          And yes, Sal’s hair type is one of the things among others (including racist notions of how black kids behave – noisy, bag grades, angry, rowdy, etc., perhaps fitting into predominate white culture less by doing things like not enjoying the same shows the majority of her white peers did or not in the same ways, whereas she may have fit better with Black American culture, as well as possibly having other physical features that set her apart like nose shape that the art style isn’t detailed enough to determine).

      2. bleepbloop

        Walky’s hair confuses me, I’m having a hard time trying to conceptualize how his hair would look in real life. I know it’s very possible for him to have straight hair, but with that style…idk I feel like with the style he already has (which, if straight, would be almost like a bowl cut???), it would only look right if his hair was already a little natural? Then again, maybe it IS, but we just can’t tell because that’s just the art style. In that case, I guess his hair just gets even more natural/coiled when surprised, rather than going from bone straight to natural.

        1. BBCC

          Walky says his hair is more like his mom’s, unless it’s very short. So probably grows straighter.

    5. Foxhack

      If I let my hair long enough, it curls up. I imagine it’s something like that (only with shorter curls.)

  11. Austyn

    I’ve never seen anyone irl so surprised that all of the product wears out of their hair suddenly. Such talent for the Walkerton twins

  12. Passchendaele

    “uhhhh…c’s are people too?”

    “yeah, terrible ones”

    1. Passchendaele

      and I love how confident walky is in her abilities that he makes such a lighthearted joke, and saddened when she reveals the truth. they’re adorable but in misery. ;_;

  13. Delicious Taffy

    Wow, Dorothy. A C? How could you disappoint your parents like this? Don’t you know that every single U.S. President has been a flawless straight-A student?

    I’m joking, of course. But it’s nice to see her not having a complete meltdown over it.

    1. Carms

      Dotty knows. The red queen hypothesis belongs elsewhere, but the quote (paraphrase) is applicable here- ‘you’ve got to run twice as fast just to stay in the same place’

    2. Kris

      This recent year has set the bar for presidents pretty low. I don’t think she has much to worry about. At this rate a chimpanzee could be president.

      1. Passchendaele

        One already is!

        *laughs evilly and flees*

        1. Emperor Daniel

          That’s an insult to chimpanzees.

        2. Chris

          It’s an insult to animal kind! The primates are offended!

          *Snicker*

      2. Austyn

        but misogyny (among other things) is what got us here so

        1. Kris

          Not to open that can of worms but I thought it was because our president basically cheated. Not to say misogyny wasn’t a contributing factor.

        2. Austyn

          yeah that too

        3. Chris

          *Ahem* Russian spies hacking *Ahe..cough, coughcoughemcough..em* Sorry, got a bit of a cold and some gunk lodged in my throat there. Totally didn’t just say something.

        4. Reltzik

          Also, an electoral college that was set up to weight the presidency away from the popular vote and in favor of voters in states with lower voting populations.

          …. because slavery.

          …. no, really. Slavery is how Trump was elected. … and I’m not even talking about his employment policies.

        5. Chris

          When you go to those southeast states there’s all those Confederate Trump supporters or those dumb enough to not know he’s cruel or those who want a Republican president

        6. zoelogical

          honestly it’s just white people. and white people are everywhere.

        7. Chris

          I’ll ignore that.

        8. zoelogical

          cool beans, still true

          http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2016/11/09/behind-trumps-victory-divisions-by-race-gender-education/

        9. zoelogical

          http://college.usatoday.com/2016/11/09/how-we-voted-by-age-education-race-and-sexual-orientation/

          actually this link is easier to read

        10. Li

          > is white

          Yeah it’s true.

          I’m a college educated white woman and we were literally the only block to go to Hillary, 51% of us voted for her. THE SLIMMEST POSSIBLE MARGIN.

          This is completely on us, Chris, sorry to break it to you.

        11. Betty Anne

          > is a mutt who looks white and enjoys white privilege everywhere

          Yeah, I’m backing up Li and zoelogical on this one. I’m also a college educated woman, and this election was 110% on white folks. Sorry to burst your #notall bubble.

        12. Chris

          No I’m white too. Surprisingly out of the 700 people at my school only about 40 of us are white. You guys are right though.

        13. zoelogical

          that sounds like a really cool experience!! tons of opportunity to learn from and meet people.

          but, yeah, i live in southern california and like there are tons of white people here who voted for trump….it’s pretty scary actually

        14. Chris

          I’m also here in soCal. Out by Fontana. Only four or five people’s parents (we’re under 18) voted for him, and only 1 or 2 were white

        15. zoelogical

          -nod nod-

          see most of my (white) extended family voted for trump as far as i know, i think i’m the only person who didn’t

      3. Kit

        “This recent year has set the bar for presidents pretty low.”

        For men. Meanwhile, the woman who isnt in the White House right now is one the most qualified people to ever run for that office.

      4. hof1991

        Only white male billionaire chimps though. So Dorothy doesn’t qualify.

    3. C.T Phipps

      Dorothy has a very supportive and decent pair of parents but I feel like they’ve left her extremely unprepared for the fact the Presidency will be determined by popularity, playing party politics, money, networking, and other things Dorothy doesn’t seem to have any plans to cultivate.

      1. zoelogical

        i kind of wonder if wanting to be president is a new thing for her

      2. Dalben

        Also, this probably hasn’t been mentioned (or I missed it), because he’s no doubt hated in this forum, but the former governor of Indiana, and current vice president went to Hannover College and Indiana University and was probably not a straight Answer student. Not saying she should imitate his career, but straight A’s and going to Yale is clearly not necessary for political success, in fact you can get a heartbeat away from the presidency after going to the very school she is now attending.

    4. Delicious Taffy

      This is starting to become one of the only forum-like sites I can stand using, and it’s honestly sort of worrying. There are already very few tolerable ones, and even those are starting to grate. As insightful and helpful as these comments sections are, I’d prefer it if there were more decent options available.

      Like, here, I can have someone respond to me in a pretty aggressive manner and not get too miffed. Elsewhere? Well, let’s just say I’ve had more than a few accounts shut down entirely, and not always because I clicked on that option.

      1. Delicious Taffy

        Maybe if you weren’t such an abhorrent jackass on most of those accounts…

        1. Delicious Taffy

          Why don’t you just shut up, honestly? I know I’ve had shitty online conduct for years. I don’t need to be reminded all the fucking time when I’m actively trying to clean up my act.

  14. Chris

    This is a bit off-topic, but the other day a bunch of thee people in my school’s office called me “presidential.” Probably cause I’m white and blonde, which makes it very racist. And then someone else called me white trash. Ugh.

    1. CanadianShinobi

      I feel like there’s context missing from this anecdote.

      1. Chris

        Nope. I walked in, one said I looked presidential, and everyone else agreed to it. Pretty much the other one was some person that I knew from lasyt year called me that because he’s thus failed to get reactions out of me

        1. Kryss LaBryn

          Was it 3 am? Were you angrily making racist tweets?

      2. Austyn

        the context may be that Dorothy wants to be president one day? No idea

        1. Chris

          I did say it was off-topic but… Yeah, Dorothy does want to be president one day.

      3. bleepbloop

        I agree, some context would’ve been nice for this lol

    2. Li

      I understand being upset st being compared to Trump (I assume) but racist is not the word you’re looking for.

      1. Li

        Okay or maybe it is, but you’re using it wrong. “White trash” is classism, directed mostly from other white people, not racism. Every time a white group in this country has experienced actual systemic racism, it has been because they were not actually considered white, which only makes sense when you remember that whiteness is a construct based entirely around excluding people (the “one drop” rule), and not actually a coherent ethnic group.

        1. Briny

          “Okay or maybe it is, but you’re using it wrong. “White trash” is classism, directed mostly from other white people, not racism”

          Well, that makes it totally alright then!

        2. Li

          Not what I said, but sure.

        3. Briny

          Not the best place to stop, but it’s your reply.

        4. Li

          I didn’t stop there. As you can plainly see. I already further explained what I meant, when the explanation should not really have been necessary, but just keep enjoying that inexplicable smug jerk thing you’ve got going I guess.

        5. Li

          like, seriously, classism is a serious problem. misogyny is a serious problem. homophobia is a serious problem.

          not being racism doesn’t make any of those things okay.

        6. Chris

          So some of my classmates are a serious problem? Good to know.

        7. Li

          … uh…

        8. Chris

          I know it’s a classism, but what if a non-white says it to you? Isn’t it technically considered racist? Being called presidential may have hit a sore spot on me too.

        9. BBCC

          No, it’s not, because its a classist term.

        10. Chris

          Sorry. I’m not very well informed on what type of ‘ist’ terms are. Ignore my idiocy

        11. Lailah

          Here, I can explain this more clearly.

          There’s no racist structure in place against white people. Nothing prevents White People (people who are certified White by modern American society) from advancing (in America.) There is _no_ racism against White People. They _are_ reinforcing something that hurts people on their class though. There is _absolutely_ something that keeps _poor_ (in particular, poor rural) people from advancing, even if they are white.

          So no, white trash isn’t racist. But it’s not okay and you shouldn’t be fucking using it just the same.

        12. Li

          What BBCC said.

  15. Stephen Bierce

    *plays “Get a Haircut (and Get a Real Job)” on the hacked P.A. speakers*

    1. jeffepp

      Clean your act up, and don’t be a slob
      Get it together, like your big brother Bob
      Cause’, he’s got a haircut, and got a real job

  16. Carms

    Also. That alt-text actually was my first thought. Sudden fluffy hair would so cheer me up

  17. Rukduk

    You know, I honestly feel like he does look better with the hair he has in the last panel, but that’s just me. Plus it’s nice to have a visible signal of when either Walkerton is in distress. Also, is this the Walkerton version of “Spider-Sense”?
    …
    Does he need help from Sal to “kill the curls” though?

    Also, good on you for trying to be helpful and supportive Walky.

    1. BBCC

      It’s happened before, when he got his first bad grade. He can just smooth it over with his hand, unlike Sal.

  18. @zombieundergrnd

    His hair is like a tribble. It just multiplied.

  19. Pigeon Pollyx

    see Willis cut away from ryan because I was too busy kicking his shit in during this panel and he didn’t want to foil the narrative. I respect that.

    1. Chris

      I was pinning him down for you. But Willis didn’t wanna ruin it. Sad. But at least we gotta beat him up for it. I also respect Willis not wanting to foil the narrative’s plot, that is a good decision

    2. Reltzik

      But…

      …. but….

      …. but the cast is FULL of foils!

      ….

      … speaking of which, hold him down for a few more minutes. I’m going to grab a foil for poking him in sensitive places. You know, livers… spleens… eyes…

      1. Chris

        Aim for the scar. Scar tissues are weaker than skin tissues

    3. zoelogical

      i was there, i was clapping

      1. Chris

        *Bows to zoelogical* Would you like an encore from me and Pigeon Pollyx?

        1. zoelogical

          im. YEAH SURE THERE’S ENOUGH BAD PEOPLE OUT THERE TO MAKE A HABIT OUT OF IT

        2. Chris

          Who to next?

        3. zoelogical

          oh jeeze i don’t know this is gonna be problematic as fuck

          let’s stick to fictional characters and beat the shit out of palpatine b/c lord knows he deserves it

        4. Chris

          Okay. How about Palatine and then General Krell? Then we’ll move on to Star Trek

        5. zoelogical

          second star to the right, and straight on till morning

          *salutes*

        6. Chris

          Ayyyy. I’m actually in my school’s production of Peter Pan right now as Captain Hook

        7. zoelogical

          oh my gosh

          that is some serendipity or What

        8. Chris

          Don’t make me pin myself down and let you beat me up :’)

        9. zoelogical

          ok dont captain hook, we’ll take you to once upon a time where you can get a sweet girlfriend

        10. Kryss LaBryn

          Is that like a sweet ride? Or “Sweet, a girlfriend!”? Or just “Wow, she’s a really sweet girl!”?

        11. zoelogical

          ALL OF THE ABOVE

        12. Chris

          Oh yeah. My brother acts Smee in the story. Isn’t Smee related to Hook in Once Upon a Time?

        13. zoelogical

          i have no idea 😮 most of what i know about OUAT is filted through people who are still watching and still salty as heck so i’m not really sure of anything i might have known anymore

          but i do know that hook and emma are dating, that is definitely a thing that’s happening

  20. C.T Phipps

    Walky has to dump her now. He can’t be associated with such riff-raff.

    1. ProfessorKickAss

      If he says that in the next strip I will piss my self laughing.

    2. Bagge

      His parents expect better

  21. Jay

    FWEEP!!

    I came in here with the sole purpose of saying this.

    . . . That is all.

    1. StClair

      Is it the Metal Gear “alert” sound?

      1. Lingo

        I imagine it as more of a soft whistle-like sound with rising pitch.

    2. Chris

      FWEEP!

    3. Marsh Maryrose

      This is going to the new “FRIST!”, isn’t it.

      1. Jay

        Good God, I hope not, I do NOT want to be responsible for THAT trend.

  22. Keulan

    My hair can’t do that, but it does get way more curly when wet.

    1. Reltzik

      …. huh. Mine gets straighter and more manageable when wet.

      ….

      MADNESS! THE LAWS OF REALITY ARE CRUMBLING! THE APOCOIFLYPSE HAS COME!

      1. Austyn

        depends on hair type, length of hair, and amount of water

        1. Chris

          My hair separates into long strands when wet. Very easy to style, but it puffs out into super thick strands when it dries

        2. bleepbloop

          The shrinkage is real when mine gets wet, y’all are lucky lol.

        3. Chris

          Mine shrinks and puffs out as it dries

  23. Pan

    So what your saying is Hijinks Ensue?

    1. insomniac

      I think we may be approaching shenanigan-level ensuing here, ranging between wacky and zany.

    2. Orion Fury

      I think he’s saying hijinks escalate for humorous escapades. Personally, I prefer to utilize a sliding scale of shenanigans for sorrowful storylines, but then, I’m not in the best of places, so ymmv.

      1. Deanatay

        Whoa, whoa, WHOA. I mean, I can understand the step up from ‘hikinks’ to ‘shennanigans’, but escalating all the way to ‘escapades’? That’s going too far, man! TOO FAR!!!

        1. Orion Fury

          Well like I said, not the best of places.

        2. Kryss LaBryn

          Aw, that sucks. 🙁

          Right; wacky shenanigans it is! Quick, Robin! To the Beck(y)mobile!

          –I had to add the Y in once I remembered they’re living in Beck Hall, haha. Mind you, now even if it’s someone other than Becky who becomes Amazi-girl’s sidekick, they can still call themselves Beck-Man or Beck-Woman. Or -Girl/-Boy. Heh.

          The only kind of Beck-mobile they’ll be able to afford is one that hangs from the ceiling and spins gently in the draft, though.

          –Although, you know, since Becky is actually couch-surfing right now, that makes her mobile, so she coooouuuuld be the Beck-mobile, herself! 😀

          She can team up with Carla. That seems appropriate for some reason, heh. Probably some kind of auto-erotic fixation, lol.

          Yeah, I’ll show myself out.

  24. Tacos

    FWEEP indeed.

    1. Hescotti

      There are fweeps. Then there are Fweeps! And then there are FWEEPS.

  25. Rocketboy1313

    “Escalating Hijinks” will now be a euphemism for an erection.

    1. Reltzik

      For something STARTING with an erection. And escalating from there.

      1. Chris

        Oh God no phrase is safe! XD

        1. Orion Fury

          Momma’s mashed potatoes?

        2. Chris

          Agh! I’m seeing everything ads even more dirty than normal! Agh! *Chris exited the Website*

        3. Kryss LaBryn

          Damn, we just rewatched Deadpool last night and now I’m remembering the mashed potatoes from “Happy Thanksgiving”…

        4. Tacos

          Exodia, obliterate?

        5. Chris

          Exodia?

        6. Tacos

          Yugioh monster. Lets you auto-win if you get all 5 cards that comprise him in your hand.

        7. Orion Fury

          I’ve heard that it’s impossible for that to happen though.

        8. BBCC

          Not impossible, but a lot of tournaments ban the cards for that exact reason.

        9. Orion Fury

          I don’t know if the joke was missed or ignored…

  26. Reltzik

    …. now, what are the odds that Dorothy’s grades will improve without any great change on her part, just because she’s no longer campaigning for RA and no longer getting sympathy-drunk with Billie?

    1. Orion Fury

      So, lightening your workload and not drinking will make it easier to get better grades? Man, that explains so much…

      1. Chris

        …My frat life has been a lie

    2. Temperaryobsessor

      But there will be other things that take time and attention until the comic is done. So many other things.

    3. thejeff

      Well, the sympathy drunk was yesterday, right? And the campaigning couldn’t have been more than a day or two longer. I doubt either had any effect on that particular grade.

      1. Reltzik

        Given that the quiz might have just covered the past week’s material and Dorothy was drunk for her study session? Yeah, a few days could easily have sabotaged it.

        1. thejeff

          Perhaps, but I’d assumed the quiz was taken earlier and handed back today.

  27. zoelogical

    that is a really cute look on walky, omg. it’s so FLUFFY

  28. JessWitt

    Eh, I made my peace with the occasional C after the first semester of sophomore year.

    YCMV but it’s not about the grade, it’s the experience and the knowledge.

    1. zoelogical

      oh my god

      the first time i got a D as my overall grade in a class i legit left college for a year

      ways to overreact, younger!zoe. i mean like that is how i figured out that i had adhd due to trying and failing to focus, over and over, but like. Ways To Overreact, Younger Me

      1. JessWitt

        I sure could have a gap year during college. Probably would have gotten my bearings in order. Maybe akin to you, I would have learned about my Asperger’s then.

        1. zoelogical

          maybe!! but i think superior to both is asking for help when you need it. contacts and communities are good things to have when you can find them.

        2. zoelogical

          okay honestly ideal is getting diagnosed as a kid and getting the help you needed through school and into adulthood

        3. JessWitt

          I did ask for help, even tried a learning disability test in first year. Alas I was just diagnosed for depression and anxiety, but there was more to it than that.

          Anyway, that’s in the past now. Moving forward.

        4. zoelogical

          :(((((

          yeah mental health awareness is…horrendously uncommon unfortunately

          idk on some level you do have to be like “ok, that was a thing that happened, moving forward” but also like on another level gotta be willing to be like “YOU KNOW WHAT, that’s not a thing that’s happening where i am if i can help it” i think

  29. caesaria82

    Yaaaassss! When Sal’s hair did this, that was one of my favorite moments on the strip ever (I have the gif someone made of this still saved somewhere!), so I looooove this callback 😀
    Maybe it’s my fave because that’s like one of the very few things in this comic that isn’t really based in reality, like spontaneous hair curly-sation does not happen lol, other than maybe due to changes in weather. So I love this little bit of beatiful weirdness <3

    1. BBCC

      Walky’s hair has done this before, but only once and he smoothed it over the very next strip, so it’s easy to forget.

      1. caesaria82

        Oh man, I did forget about that until someone linked it upthread. But maybe Sal’s is more memorable to me because of the gif 😉

        1. BBCC

          TBF, Sal’s hair looked banging when natural.

        2. caesaria82

          Definitely agree! Idk if you’ve ever seen the new Netflix show Dear White People, but the main character Sam would be such a perfect cast for live action Sal in all her natural hair glory 😀

        3. BBCC

          I haven’t yet, but I’ve heard it was brilliant! Casting the characters would be cool. I know Willis said Ethan resembles a young Jake Gyllenhaal.

        4. BBCC

          OMG apparently Logan Browning (the woman who plays Sam) has actually played a character named Sally before. This is perfect.

        5. BBCC

          Walky’s skin isn’t lighter than Sal’s. You can find someone the same shade for him.

        6. BBCC

          Fuck, that was supposed to be in reply to bleepbloop

        7. bleepbloop

          Do you have any ideas for Walky? It would be harder finding someone for him because you’d have to make sure they’re at least half a shade lighter than whoever is (fan)casted as Sal. And now I’m trying to think of actors who look like Jake Gyllenhaal but are in their late teens/early twenties.
          Wait! Actually if you’ve watched The Get Down on netflix, the guy who plays Zeke would make a convincing enough Walky…

        8. Kryss LaBryn

          I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Colm Feore for Gallasso. It’s like he was the character model; it’s crazy. 😀

        9. Chris

          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-5/02-threes-a-crowd/congrats/

          Kaching!

        10. caesaria82

          Right! Shock over grades causes hair-fweepage in Walkertons. Interesting. Someone should fund a research paper on this.

        11. BBCC

          Seems like it’s shock in general.

    2. caesaria82

      The gif in question: http://www.dumbingofage.com/images/blog/molochmachine-salhair.gif 😀 I love how hers is ‘foomp’ and his is ‘fweep’.

      1. Shiro

        Shorter strands make for a higher pitch, I guess.

    3. zoelogical

      it’s so adorable!!!!!!!!!

      1. caesaria82

        It isssss, I love it!

        1. zoelogical

          fluff!!!!!!!!!!

          luv the scrunch!!

  30. BBCC

    Now I’m wondering if we’ll ever see Sal with curly hair again. Hopefully when her parents aren’t there because her parents are jackasses.

  31. Rob Carlson

    I’ll admit this is an attitude you can only take when you’re in a position where your grades don’t directly affect your financial aid, but if you never get a C in college that can mean one of two things: 1) You’re exceptional, or much more likely 2) You didn’t challenge yourself enough with your course selections. For real, some of the most valuable things I learned in college were in classes where I was out of my league and had to push myself just to keep up with the material. I could have taken an easier course and it would’ve boosted my GPA and still fulfilled the same requirement for graduation, but in terms of knowledge and experience taking the course that was a little too hard for me was by far the better choice.

    As for Dorothy, I don’t think we know enough to say whether this C is because she’s in a course that’s pressing her limits or if this is slippage resulting from all the crap going on in her life.

    1. BBCC

      Dorothy did take a heavy course load so she could impress Yale, so she’s probably aiming for ‘exceptional’. That plus the crap going on is probably not helping.

      1. butts

        That Dorothy is (or is at least attempting to be) exceptional kind of comes out in her very first sentence in DoA. And grades are mostly arbitrary, never getting a C has a lot less to do with your actual performance and a lot more to do with how your particular school (or that particular department, or even that particular teacher) decides to grade.

        Plus, not all of us have the choice of taking “easier” or “harder” courses, mind you. Some major choices are fairly restrictive.

      2. Dalben

        She’s probably just not that exceptional in terms of academic ability. After all, if she could theoretically make it at Yale, but just missed it, why isn’t she at another lesser Ivy? Or a top 20 school? Or 30? Or 40? Or why isn’t shev(as far as we know) on a full scholarship for her academics since she’s so much better than the other students. I mean Indianas’s a fine school and there plenty of reasons to go there aside from money and you can’t get into somewhere more highly ranked, but she clearly cares very much about academic ranking and ambition and has made no mention that I can recall of any reason for going to Indiana aside from not getting into Yale. That makes me think that for whatever reason she’s just not that much above average at Indiana and transferring to Yale. She could maybe get into Yale Law school, it’s super hard, but not impossible and a slow start as a freshman wouldn’t stop her, but she needs to re-evaluate what she’s doing.

        1. Deathjavu

          Ivy league spots are so few and mostly passed out on nepotisitic/money-based grounds, you can be 99th percentile and still not be accepted because you weren’t 99.9th percentile.

          What I’m saying is, there’s such a high bar that Dorothy could be well above average, but still not have been accepted to Yale.

        2. BBCC

          She may have only applied to Yale, with Indiana as her safety school.

        3. Jhon

          If Dorothy had gotten into an Ivy league school, Willis would have needed to create a whole new cast of characters (instead of recycling the SP! ones).
          /meta

  32. Cheshrin

    Well, that just fweeps my hair!

  33. Nico

    Yes! Open communication! Common ground for sympathy and development! Please let this go well!

    1. Delicious Taffy

      Your naivete is inspiring.

      1. Chris

        Your comment fills me with hope and inspiration!

  34. ProfessorKickAss

    Will Dorothy start taking Adderal now? (Legally or Illegally)

    1. zoelogical

      does she look like annie edison to you

      1. Schpoonman

        Aw, little Annie Adderal. I need to rewatch Community.

        1. zoelogical

          it’s been a while but that was a good show

  35. maxyai

    And then Child Services are called because of her escalating hijinks. Dorothy apologizes and says it was all a joke and Walky was in on it. She deletes her Youtube channel but the damage has already been done and Walky is taken away.
    Something like that?

    1. Haven

      no

    2. Delicious Taffy

      What the fuck are you talking about?

      1. bleepbloop

        It’s a reference to this “”””prank/vlog”””” youtube channel run by this hick family that posted videos where the parents would prank the kids. Some of the pranks resulted in physical and emotional harm in the children, especially one of them in particular that tended to get the brunt of the mistreatment. They would yell and curse at the kid for things he didn’t do because making him cry was “””the joke”””, break his toys, have his older siblings tackle him, and in a couple instances the dad would hit him. Some big name youtuber called them out on it in a video and got their channel taken down after everyone reported them, and CPS finally came through and took the kids away. Sucks for the kids though, because they’re either going to foster care, or going back to their birth mom (the mom on the channel is their stepmom) who is rumored to be also abusive?? It’s a huge mess.

        1. Delicious Taffy

          Uh, wow. Okay. Shit.

        2. Betty Anne

          The two taken by CPS were (at least temporarily) placed with their birth mother. The other kids are still with DaddyOFive and his current wife. (I didn’t watch his channel, so I don’t know if they’re her kids or not. I’ve just been following the news articles.) The YouTube community who rallied to get the kids removed has not been able to pin down the reason their birth mother lost custody, but they did find a suggestion that their father and stepmother exploited the birth mother’s bipolar disorder in order to get custody.

        3. CJ

          Whenever you think that you’ve seen all the sociopathic stupidity possible, somebody ups the ante.

          Slightly OT: since a few days, my browser suddenly automatically reloads the page after a time “because it encountered an error”
          Anyone else gets this?

          Hurray, Le Pen is out!

  36. Bagge

    Puh, OK, this does a lot to calm me down. Dorothy has cooled down enough to talk to Walky and verbalize the problem. It still hurts, of course, and she has some tough decisions coming up, but now she can make them with support from her friends.

    It was a petty little jab, but at least she didn’t drag it out, and Walky took it well.

    Next step: Tell Joyce, cash in ALL the hugs.

    1. Li

      I don’t think it was really intended as a jab if you mean that she pointed out that she’s felt like this before. More like “oh hey I recognize this, haha… irony 🙁 ..”

      Partly the observation is I think a momentary delaying tactic to let her prepare to answer his question properly.

      But I think ultimately it will only be GOOD for their relationship that he understands his telling her nothing was wrong repeatedly hurt her, too; that they’re in the same emotional place with each other.

      1. Bagge

        I’m sure you are right about the momentary delay tactic – Dorothy does that a lot. And it will be good for them. In Dorothy’s words, this will help Walky to see her as less “perfect”, and it will help him understand his own value in the relationship. It will also help her move away from the “help everyone” mindset.

  37. Senorange

    Man didn’t she get a 76? The States are harsh on the students that’s a B something or other in Canada.

    1. BBCC

      Eh, depends on the school in the US. They’re screwy.

      1. Danni

        at the schools i went to, 76 was a C+

      2. DinaWho

        Sometimes it depends on the course, too. Mid-high 70s was like a B+ in the organic chemistry course I took, I think. Like no other class at the school used that grading scale.

        1. Deathjavu

          That’s because organic chemistry is a godless monster of a class, and if the scale wasn’t pushed down too much of the class would fail.

    2. Needfuldoer

      We went over this in the strip you mentioned, but (for the most part) in the US:
      A = 90s
      B = 80s
      C = 70s
      D = 60s
      F = 59 or lower
      + is generally a x8 or x9, – is x0 to x4. A+ includes 100.

    3. Chris

      In my ELA a 76 is a B, and 80 or above is an A. Teacher uses rubric grading

    4. BenRG

      Purely personally, I would have considered a ‘C’ in math a slam-dunk. I’ve never been too good in that stuff.

    5. poofdepoof

      In my program (CS at Berkeley, if anyone cares), that number means nothing if you don’t know the context of the class distribution &c. So probably a B at least.

      1. Senorange

        I mean maybe it’s different at a Uni but at the college everything used the same scale but yeah that’s like a B, B+ territory. Maybe then Dorothy wouldn’t feel so bad.

  38. BenRG

    I’m sure that it was a huge shock for Dorothy but why did it happen? Hard course or is she spending too much time on other things?

    1. BBCC

      Little of column A, little of column B.

    2. madock345

      Probably emotional disturbance. I know even if they don’t take up much time in my life, my grades slip when emotional shit goes down. Mental exhaustion. Surely breaking up with a long-term boyfriend, trying to help joyce and becky, dealing with Amazigirl craziness…. That’s gotta take a toll on mental reserves.

  39. madock345

    I do really enjoy that it’s been canonically established that in the Dummiverse, shock makes your hair curl. Not even as a visual gag, sal had drama over it.

    Will walky have to straighten his hair now? Maybe get some help from Sal and have positive sibling bonding time? 😀

    Will Sal see him with curly hair and accuse him of appropriating her struggle? D:

    Or will it turn out not to work like that for anyone else and things will return to normal in the next strip? 😛

    1. Needfuldoer

      It’s the Walkerton twins’ residual superpower.

    2. bleepbloop

      They’re the same race so I don’t think she’d accuse him of appropriation lol. But I would like to see if this lasts! Last time Walky’s hair poofed (texturized?? naturalized??) all he had to do to get it straight again was run his hands through it which…isn’t very realistic but also tells me that Walky’s hair texture might be less coiled than Sal’s, since she did have to actually get her hair re-straightened. But if the alt-text means anything, I think his hair will still be like that by the next strip!

      1. JBento

        Walky’s hair might very well be less coiled. Sal has said he’s “come out whiter” than she has.

        1. BBCC

          It is less curly. He can just smooth his hair over with his hand. She has to actually pay to get her’s relaxed.

  40. Ashonai

    I’ve been there.
    …I’ve been there.

  41. JBento

    I’ve been meaning to ask: when does the AHCA v2 (Now With More Vile) get voted on the Senate?

    And also, I don’t know if we have any french on the commentariat, but if your countryfolk could find it in themselves to make today’s the only vote in, what, the last year and a half? that doesn’t make me want to burn the world, that’d be just grand.

    1. thejeff

      Not soon. Quite possibly, not at all.
      They may hold a pro forma vote on the House’s version, but they’re already working on their own.
      The House version shouldn’t qualify to be passed under reconciliation, so Democrats can filibuster. There are games they can play with that, but I’d expect them to save that for their own version. The Senate moves slower and I’d expect time at least for the CBO to analyze both the House version and whatever the Senate comes up with.
      There may be some sneaky plan here other than getting Trump a symbolic victory, but I’m not at all sure about that.

      Meantime: Call your Senators. And don’t stop calling your Rep either. The Senate will be watching to see if the fallout from the House vote dies off quickly.

      1. JBento

        Thanks.

        …

        I’m torn between wishing I had a senator so I could call their ass, and happy I don’t and am therefore safe from the crap they seem to continuously pull.

        1. BBCC

          I recommend telling your American friends to call their senator and rep. And if they don’t have one, tell them to call the party majority leader.

    2. SillyGoose

      [France reporting here] Happy to oblige. Although tbh, I’m torn between relief that Macron won, and horror at the thought that I’m happy the Front National “only” got 35%. Not so long ago, when Le Pen senior got 20%, half of France was in the streets screaming defiance. This time, there was more of a “Bleh, whatever” vibe, which is scary.

      1. BBCC

        [slides France a dollar from Canada] Thank you. Also, because I forgot [slides one to the Netherlands as well].

  42. THEHYPERBOLOID

    *Steve Martin voice*
    I remember when I made my first C.

    But seriously, I listened to breakup music for a couple of weeks after I made my first college C.

  43. Deanatay

    Casting update for Dumb Wars: A New Hopeless –

    David Walkerton cast as D-Fwee-P-W, bumbling protocol droid sidekick to the beautiful Princess Dottia Orkeena. He teams up with Rawr-2-D-Na, a valiant but hard-to-communicate-with astromech droid, to save the princess when she is kidnapped…

    1. zoelogical

      ive never wanted to ship c-3p0 and princess leia before WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME

  44. thejeff

    I’m also glad that one of yesterday’s possibilities didn’t materialize. Dorothy didn’t wind up storming off on her own, with Ryan following.
    Long term threat from Ryan remains, but it’s not likely to be an immediate attack.

    Unless, Roz?

    1. JBento

      We HAVE never seen Roz’s face-punching capabilities, have we? I mean, we know that Sal, Amber, and Joyce (assuming she doesn’t PTSD out) can beat the shit out of Ryan, but do we have any idea if Roz can handle herself in a fight)

      1. madock345

        I don’t think we know for sure at all, but everything about her screams that she could. It’s perfectly possible that she actually can’t, but it would very much go with the rest of her character.

      2. Jhon

        Roz is a middle sister.

      3. Lingo

        Considering what even sweet naive sheltered home-schooled Joyce was able to do to Ryan while DRUGGED, there is no female DOA character I would bet against in a fight.

    2. Kris

      I don’t know if Ryan even has a reason to go after Roz. She’s not directly associated with Joyce and her only relation to the incident was that it occurred at her party. She might know who he is but he has no reason to believe she’s more informed than anyone else who has seen his picture.

      If I were him the short list would be:
      Joyce obviously
      Sarah
      Sal
      Amazi-grl
      Dorothy.

      1. JBento

        Seeing as 4 out of those 5 have already proven themselves capable of handling Ryan in the proper manner, that does not bode well for Dorothy. 8/

        1. thejeff

          Which is why I’m happy that Walky caught up with Dorothy and she’s not storming off alone to sulk.

      2. BBCC

        Billie was there too, but she’s A) Capable and B) Ruth’s with her and will probably stick his balls on a spike if he tries to hurt Billie.

        1. Commodore Jeep-Eep

          Assuming she doesn’t first.

        2. JBento

          Yeah, I agree with Jeep-Eep on this one. Ryan vs Billie is less of “oh no, Billie” situation, and more of a “pass the popcorn, this is is going to be FUN” one.

        3. BBCC

          TBH, Ryan vs AG, Ryan vs Sarah, Ryan vs Sal, and Ryan vs a sufficiently pissed and adrenaline fuelled Joyce (as opposed to a frightened Joyce, as she tends to freeze up) is going to be a pass the popcorn situation. Basically anyone he could possibly blame except Dorothy would be able to knock him into next week. Which is probably why he’s following Dorothy.

      3. Tan

        The party at which the incident occured was not Roz’s party. It was Ron’s. Roz just happened to be attending and invited Dorothy along (who then brought Joyce and Billie as well).

        1. Kris

          I stand corrected. In my defense Roz and Ron are only one letter apart. Also who the hell is Ron?

        2. emusam

          Ron’s three appearances, one of which seems to be a shirt sleeve. http://www.dumbingofage.com/tag/ron/

  45. HeySo

    >escalating hijinks

    Would read.

  46. Dorje Sylas

    Welcome to departments that grade on a Curve. As in “we follow a bell curve of achievement, if you are in the first percentile of student, regardless of your actually knowledge or skill, you will get a C”. Even if everyone did really well and demonstrated excellent mastery of the material worthy of an A in any other course. BTW “Fuck yo-scholarship if you need a B or higher average”.

  47. Aggrax

    How nice of Walky to care now that he realizes that Dorothy might have to refocus her attention on things that matter (her grades) rather than waste time on things that don’t (him).

  48. itsaboo

    I love Dorothy. She uses her own misery as a teaching moment, and then actually tells Walky what’s going on when she could very easily bottle things up or laugh it off.

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