128

Hand-me-down
Posted on April 1, 2018 by David M Willis

128 thoughts on “Hand-me-down”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    respect for Faz immediately skyrocketed

    finished TWO drawings, DANG!!

    (ok the same one twice but STILL)

    1. Doctor_Who

      You should see the Buffer Watch on his webcomic!

    2. KaitouKidisBae

      Well, the way to get good at drawing is to keep drawing the same thing a bajillion times, so y’know, he’s got his artistic career on the right track 🙂

      1. Dark

        Yeah, not really.

        My uncle got really good at drawing hands due to years of being grounded and drawing pictures of his hands…

        But only his own hands. He is unable to draw any other hands.

        1. Clif

          Well, yes, but he stuck with it til he got it right.

          Wait for it.

          You really have to hand it to him.

        2. Junebugs

          You are a language criminal. And you belong in word jail. >[

        3. HeySo

          “word jail”

          I hear they really watch their language there.
          I hear they keep to a really punctual schedule there.
          I hear the sentences they give out really run on.
          I hear you have to be careful with your attitude, or the guards will leave you dealing with a com(m)a.
          I hear they keep trying to imprison Larry Bird. Y’know, ’cause Bird is the word.
          I hear that the only thing they serve in the prison is alphabet soup.
          I hear..

        4. Valerie

          *claps*

        5. TachyonCode

          *chirps*

        6. Clif

          Word!

        7. Needfuldoer

          Is that where you go when you get caught commiting word crimes?

        8. nothri

          https://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2014/01/24/sagacity

        9. Ninjamaid

          You mean a punitentiary?

        10. adjudicus

          I’d imagine it to be more like a pungeon, to be honest

  2. AnvilPro

    I want the next year of comics to be this.

    APRIL FOOL’S! I want all comics from now on to be this.

  3. Stephen Bierce

    *plays “Fooled Around And Fell In Love” on the hacked P.A. speakers*

    1. Deanatay

      Good choice, good choice!

  4. shadowcell

    Joyce + Faz = Jaz

    welp sorry everyone Jaz is officially the best couple, the forms have been submitted and everything

    1. Tacos

      Were they in triplicate?

    2. Ana Chronistic

      You can’t Foyce’d that on us!

    3. HeySo

      #JazHands

    4. TachyonCode

      This ship sunk before it sailed. That’s an achievement. It wasn’t even in the water.

      1. Clif

        But it created quite the splash.

    5. Sunny

      It’s good, but I like “Fayze” a little better. As in “NOT THE FAYZE!”

  5. darkoneko

    Of course he assume Jacob looks like him. Of course.

    1. Reltzik

      TBF, he doesn’t have the least clue what Jacob actually looks like.

      1. The Other Mike

        Although he did get the “muscular” part right.

  6. admiralnoob

    Faz 2018: Still more likeable than Mary.

    1. Doctor_Who

      There are venereal diseases more likeable than Mary.

    2. Some1

      Well Mary actually tried to harm people, so far Faz has shown no desire to physically or emotionally harm anyone.

      1. Stu

        Well, not INTENTIONALLY, anyway.

    3. Needfuldoer

      I bet he’s already a better artist, too.

      1. Deanatay

        He’s already past the ‘anime’ phase.

        1. Deanatay

          For him, it was the ‘hentai’ phase.

  7. Yumi

    Good on Joyce, but I was kind of hoping that he’d keep getting passed around the cast. Maybe once Joyce is in class.

    1. Doctor_Who

      That would be awesome. Everyone passes him on to the next person, until he’s with increasingly minor characters with no connection to him or Amber whatsoever.

      Eventually he ends up with Galasso, and It Begins Anew.

      1. Yumi

        For a while he’s just chained to Blowjob Cat.

        1. Arawn

          Faz drawn inside blowjob cat’s mouth with graphs littering the ground. Literally the closest he’s going to get to actual sex for a while.

        2. HeySo

          Now I actually wanna see an arc that goes that direction..

      2. Marsh Maryrose

        I have a hunch his stint with Sarah would be…memorable.

        What Lucy would make of him, I have no idea.

        Nash and Rose would mercilessly mock him in sign and probably verbally as well.

      3. thejeff

        Eventually someone passes him back to Amber with no idea there’s a connection.

    2. JessWitt

      A campus wide game of (not so) hot potato.

      1. Yumi

        Within the day it just becomes accepted that This Is What Is Happening Now. Someone comes up to you with Faz and says, “Hey, can you watch this kid?” and you gotta.

        1. HeySo

          Don’t forget to say “No Fazbacks!”. If you do that, then the other person will have to watch them for at least 10 minutes before being allowed to try and pass Faz on again.

        2. threePwny

          10 minutes is too merciful. Make it 30, maybe an hour if you’re feeling really sadistic.

  8. Passchendaele

    Nope, Joyce isn’t interested in Jacob at all, why else would she immediately look at the picture in Panel 4. 😛

    1. Passchendaele

      Also, calling it – the slipshine is Joe and Jacob

      1. Passchendaele

        oh damnit

    2. ValdVin

      Yep, a nice juxtaposition with Joyce’s swipe–crunch in Panel three.

      If only Walky had been there Joyce could have given the first one to eat.

      1. Passchendaele

        He’d eat it for the few seconds before he figures out what it is and barfs it out. 😛

  9. Yumi

    Wait, is it weird to headcanon a minor drawing porn? Because I was about to be like, “New headcanon: all Slipshines are drawn by Faz,” but

    1. Some1

      Faz is always there: sitting, waiting, watching…

    2. Wizard

      I’m pretty sure most people develop an interest in sex, and possibly porn, before they’re legally adults. So no, not so weird.

  10. Paradox

    No one commenting on Joyce leaning in with interest for the second drawing?

    Well it was cute. Adorable, even.

    1. Schpoonman

      Oh my god yes.

    2. Some1

      When Faz leaves…

      Faz: I have made another drawing for you.

      Joyce: Faz, I am not interested in…hey is that actually Jacob?

      Faz: Yes.

      Joyce: Aw. Thank you Faz!

      Jacob: I am deeply uncomfortable.

      1. Deanatay

        Faz: It is actually Jacob’s head on my body. I know, it’s hard to tell the difference.

  11. DailyBrad

    It’s kinda hilarious that Joyce wants to see what the Jacob one looks like.

    Faz quite wrongly assumes she’d ever want to make out with him, but did get her favored bodytype right, it looks like. She’s crushed on Jacob, and gone on dates with Joe and Ethan. She does seem to like tall, broad shouldered dudes.

    (Though, young her unwittingly crushed on young Walky, so all bets are off)

    1. Beef

      Was there a bit about a young Joyce and Walky in this universe?

      1. Catullus

        When Walky appeared in the Hymmel the Humming Hymnal video.

      2. Derek

        When it was revealed that Walky was on some kiddie TV show earlier in the comic, Joyce remembered having a crush on him when she watched the show as a kid. When it was revealed that the little boy on the show and the guy she barely tolerates now were the same guy . . . yeah, that didn’t go over very well.

        1. DailyBrad

          Yeah, awkwardness was had by both of them, with Dorothy teasing before they made a 3-way pact to strike the event from their memories.

  12. Koms

    Faz: And also this drawing I did of you kissing what I presume Jacob looks like.
    Joyce:
    Faz:April fool!!!! ?

  13. Tacos

    Of course Joyce leans in with interest to see a drawing of her making out with Jacob. Then again, I think everybody would do the same.

  14. Keulen

    I’m not sure it’s even possible for Faz to dial down his creepazoid factor.

    1. Council

      I mean, he did.

      The problem is, this is it.

      1. Roborat

        Yup, not a lot of travel on that dial.

  15. IAMASHAMED

    So, do we get to see those drawings, or…

    1. Reltzik

      Given Willis’s ominous tweets, we get to see a whole lot more than those drawings.

      1. Reltzik

        …. or it can be Jonny.

        … Janny? DaJoe? ….. whatever.

    2. Bagge

      The slipshine quality has really slipped lately…

      1. threePwny

        Oh, this’ll really shine, alright

  16. Kernanator

    Our Faz who art in Faz
    Hallowed be thy Faz
    Thy kingdom Faz
    Thy will be Faz
    On Earth as it is in Faz

    1. King Daniel

      Give us this day our daily Faz
      And forgive us our Faz as we forgive those who Faz against us
      And lead us not into Faz, but deliver us from Faz
      For yours is the Faz and the Faz and the Faz forever
      A’Faz

      1. Deanatay

        Happy Easter Faz’s Day!

  17. Some1

    Is it weird that I kind of hope something happens at the end of this arc that requires Faz to unleash his inner creepiness, but for the forces of good.

    1. dralou

      … You a fan of “Hentai Kamen” ? If not, you might want to give it a try.

      1. ninja_jesus

        Oh boy, I’ve seen the live action movie. It’s fantastic

      2. Eldritch Gentleman

        And now you gave me a mental image of Ryan with his head caught in… well we all know where, as Hentai Kamen Faz poses. The criminals of this University thought that Amazi-Girl was bad… they were WRONG.

  18. TrueVCU

    Faz will now tweet you a link to his DeviantArt account

  19. Derek

    Faz is a good enough artist that Joyce can recognize his own caricature of himself from a quick sketch.
    Maybe Mary will take lessons from him?

  20. Reltzik

    I’ve said before that Joyce doesn’t want to be a mom.

    It now appears obvious that she also doesn’t want to go into education.

    1. Portland

      Not disagreeing with you, but how do you figure? I’m curious.

      1. Reltzik

        Because teaching 6th grade would probably involve doing pretty much exactly this on a weekly basis.

  21. Falcon

    Faz has a great art career ahead of him. It may exclusively be in hentai, but his work rate will be unparalleled.

    1. Zee

      I feel like he’d make a killing on the furries.

  22. Yumi

    I have a completely optional challenge for anyone who’s interested:
    (I’d recommend not doing this today because it’s April Fool’s and people can be suspicious and that’s not fun.)
    Write messages, letters, whatever to people you care about. Friends, mentors, family if you have that kind of relationship with your family, whoever. Maybe someone you’ve admired for a long time but have never really talked to. Write them to as many people as you feel comfortable sending them to. Make them cheesy and heartfelt and tell them what you like about them, any special memories, whatever.

    I did this last night, writing messages to ten people. My mental health has been shit lately– in fact at the time I undertook this project, I was crying in a Starbucks. But doing this really helped me feel better, at least for a day. So really this is a self-care challenge, along with a the-world-is-shitty, make-it-suck-slightly-less challenge.

    I also did this a few years back where I was writing one message a night for a while. I have to say that I prefer doing a bunch at once and found it impacted me in a greater way.

    This is also what I was getting at with my “you’re good eggs” comment on here yesterday. I was just, like, drunk levels of tired by that point. But, yeah, good eggs.

    1. sdrainbow

      Back when I was a teacher, I set aside time every week to call parents of kids who did Good Things. It’s always great to get the “hey, I’m calling about Johnny” “what did he do now?” “oh, no, he gave me a drawing today that I thought was really good and I wanted to share with you!” exchange, and it really makes both parties feel a lot better.

      1. dralou

        This is a genuinely great idea: you keep in touch with the parents, they feel more connected to what happens to their kid in school and there’s positive reinforcement too.

      2. Yumi

        One of the best parts about student teaching was that my mentor teacher let me make these calls “for practice” without making me also make the “your student is failing my class” calls.

    2. C.T Phipps

      *hug* You have my sympathies, empathies, and prayers Yumi. Whatever can be done to help you, I want to help with.

    3. LynziGraye

      Internet hugs if you would like them. That’s a lovely undertaking, and I hope your mental health improves soon!

  23. JessWitt

    Faz is such a sketchy teen.

    1. Bagge

      He is not bad. He is just drawn that way.

      1. King Daniel

        Does anyone know whether or not a pencil or a pen is what he uses to draw?

        1. UniqueSnowflake2

          Faz? Definitely a pen is.

        2. tyersome

          Don’t be so cocksure!

        3. adjudicus

          That’s a pretty bold predicktion

      2. adjudicus

        Could what he said yesterday be an inkling as to his true colours?

  24. Bagge

    How is that whole “dialing down” thing working for you, Faz?

    1. ValdVin

      I’m taken aback that he actually recognizes the creepazoid factor, in order to try dialing it down.

  25. NinjaNick

    Faz has some art skills, but he’s still a little creep. :p

  26. BenRG

    He wouldn’t be Faz if he didn’t use his artistic skills to flirt… unsuccessfully.

    1. Emily

      Faz crossed the line from flirtation to sexual harassment pretty much instantly.

      1. Eldritch Gentleman

        I’m not sure about that, you assume that his very existence is not an act of sexual harassment.

  27. newllend(henryvolt)

    Nice April fools joke there Faz.

  28. erejnion

    Sasuga Faz.

  29. Eldritch Gentleman

    Is it just me or he is messing with Joyce?

    1. Deanatay

      Has it occurred to you that Faz messes with EVERYONE?

      1. Eldritch Gentleman

        Ah what I mean is Intentionally. Not just by being Faz and unknowingly disturbing people but he genuinely understands Joyce and used that to mess with her.

        1. thejeff

          Is his behavior really any different than with anyone else?

        2. Eldritch Gentleman

          It’s just this feel that the last panel gave me.

  30. Ainara

    RE: April’s Fools: not the well-chinned tall Jewish hunk Danny wants, but the one he deserves.

  31. Apostate

    Joyce’s indignant face in the last panel is so goddamned adorable. Also, goddamn, Faz. Stopit.

    1. stoodmuffin

      Right on both counts

  32. stoodmuffin

    Faz is Fazing a faz in the fucking faz

    1. Emperor Norton II

      Faz is the new smurf?

  33. nlips

    Faz is starting his own Slipshine page.

  34. keithcurtis

    “What the heckin’ heck.” will be my new catch phrase.

    1. SpaceshipPilot

      It is a pretty amazing phrase.

    2. Marsh Maryrose

      Alternatively, “What the fudging fudge?”

      We Rate Dogs followers would say, “What the h*cking h*ck?”

    3. ValdVin

      Wasn’t “effin effer” Joyce’s first outburst after the toenail was conquistadored?

      I think “Xin x(er)” is her substitute for all occasions.

  35. abysswatcher1993

    Joyce wants big guys, not little grunts that… wait, she married Walky in the Walkyverse. Nevermind, she just wants a guy that isn’t a creep.

  36. PB

    He is risen!

    1. Agemegos

      Faz?

      1. Marisa Mockery

        Faz is always risen.

  37. not someone else

    …This pairing kinda makes me wish we could buy like a floppy of single Slipshine comic or a single print, physical maybe so it wouldn’t hurt not dropping fifty bucks on a subscription. That’s not a thing, is it? (No offense, I get the impression the site is primarily het.)

    Maybe I could just buy a book-and-sketch and ask for Joe and Danny smooching. Is *that* a thing?

    1. Roborat

      Actually, the site is far from primarily het.

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