234

Dunkin’
Posted on March 18, 2019 by David M Willis
Over at the Book 8 Kickstarter, we're about $800 away from unlocking Rachel's character magnet!  So close, you guys.  So close.

234 thoughts on “Dunkin’”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    SOON

    1. TrueVCU

      The Poon That Was Promised

    2. TrueVCU

      Becky seems insufficiently excited by the amount of lesbian drama that’s about to unfold

      1. TrueVCU

        Becky seems insufficiently excited by the amount of lesbian drama that’s about to unfold

        1. Clif

          But Becky has no way to predict that when Sal drops hints she’s into Marcie that Malaya will think she’s hinting she’s into Carla.

        2. Abbefaria

          Calling it now that hijinks end in an awkward three way, and Joe wondering why he wasn’t invited.

        3. das-g

          Because it’s even more awkward when more than three want to participate in the same awkward threeway.

      2. Deanatay

        Might Becky be a bit… distracted… by what Joyce just said?

        Joyce: It might be weird to act like you’re into your best friend…
        Into your best friend…
        INTO YOUR BEST FRIEND…
        INTO YOUR BEST FRIEND…

        *Becky’s pants spontaneously combust*

        1. Geneseepaws

          Is there a fire extinguisher in each room, or just three on each hall in the dorm?

        2. ValdVin

          Is it appropriate for Becky to think “Stupid sexy Joyce” after that?

    3. Marsh Maryrose

      That totally looks like Willis’s art (especially the cheek blushes). Is it yours or was it a commission? Either way it’s awesome.

      1. Needfuldoer

        Looks like a Kickstarter makeout commission to me.

        1. Ana Chronistic

          the first of many

  2. AnvilPro

    Joyce and Becky have seen every single Lindsay Lohan kids movie

  3. StClair

    How dare they be (possibly) right!

    1. Doctor_Who

      I don’t know if this power is specific to love sleuthing, I think these two just both have a natural aptitude for wacky hijinks.

      Like, imagine you wanted them to break into Fort Knox. If you gave them access to a crack team of mercenaries, the world’s greatest locksmith, an EMP device, and a backpack full of C4, it would never work.

      If you gave them two rubberbands, some brownie mix, and a My Little Pony doll, and arranged it so they somehow didn’t know what they were doing and thought this was all to put in a bake sale, somehow they’d be in before you can say “shenanigans”.

      1. StClair

        Good point.

        1. MatthewTheLucky

          It’s like they’re always on Cadbury Cereal.

        2. Clif

          I’d buy an occasional box of Cadbury Cereal if it had Joyce and Becky on the box. Who wouldn’t?

      2. Astaphe

        As a lesbian, I can confirm that pretty much all lesbian romance involves wacky hijinks.

        1. Clif

          Head canon accepted.

        2. Marsh Maryrose

          I knew it!

        3. Marisa Mockery

          Seconded. It takes some careful orchestration to find out if a girl is into girls before asking her out without it getting super awkward. Shenanigans is basically flirting

        4. BarerMender

          When I lived in New York, I had a roommate who was a member of the Lesbian Sex Mafia. You talk about hijinks, wacky and otherwise. Those people lived for hijinks.

        5. Makkabee

          That’s the perfect title for… something.

        6. Doctor_Who

          A 20+ entry cinematic universe complete with spinoff shows and billions in combined box office receipts?

        7. BarerMender

          They have a Wikipedia page. The name depends on the general age of the membership. When they’re young and feisty, its Lesbian Sex Mafia. When they’re a little more mature and have an eye to public relations, it’s Lesbian Sado-Masochists.

        8. Colineo

          I always suspected I had no understanding of public relations, but that clinches it.

        9. Sharkfin Bangs

          I have so many questions I want to ask, like, immediately, but don’t know where to even start.

      3. Buggman

        Bloody …. write the friggin fanfic, already. And sell it to someone in Hollywood before California completes its economic collapse.

  4. ValdVin

    Panel six Joyce, who are you directing that statement to?

    1. dethtolldotmid

      To Sal. She’s oblivious.

      1. Durandal_1707

        Hey, it’s another poster with a Marathon avatar! Cheers.

        1. dethtolldotmid

          😀

    2. DailyBrad

      To Sal. She knew Becky liked her, obviously, that was a big thing, but I don’t think she’d say something like that as a dig *at* Becky. That’d be pretty hurtful.

  5. BBCC

    Willis, I was already gonna buy book 9 for the Sal storyline, you didn’t need to add this.

    I mean, I’m glad you did because this is gonna be HILARIOUS, but still. 😛

    1. Regalli

      How well can Sal flirt with her best friend? Let’s find out! 😀

      1. BBCC

        I have no idea, but I love this storyline already.

        It’s relevant to my interests.

    2. AntJ

      The next storyline is “Chum Malaya”, so I’m guessing this is the start of something extensive!

      1. Geneseepaws

        Chum, as in buddy?
        Or Chum as in food fer da’ fishes. Cousin Vinny thinks it is chem fer ‘buddy’.

      2. Schpoonman

        Oh goddammit, that pun.

  6. Stephen Bierce

    *plays “Pipeline” by Stevie Ray Vaughn in memory of Dick Dale on the hacked Muzak*

    1. Stephen Bierce

      Pipelines, Donuts–they’re BOTH hole-hole-hole-hole-y things.

      1. Chris Phoenix

        In a whole donut there’s a nice whole hole
        If you take a big bite, hole the whole hole tight
        If a little bit bitten or a great bit bitten,
        Any whole hole with a hole bitten in it
        is a holey whole hole,
        and it just… plain… isn’t!
        (from Homer Price)

        1. Chris Phoenix

          Argh… Just to be pedantic at myself:
          it’s When you take a big bite, hold the whole hole tight.

        2. BarerMender

          I thought it must be.

        3. Ryek Hvek

          Homer Price 2020 – the Hole Truth

  7. butts

    aww, joyce, no

    1. wwwhhattt

      It wouldn’t be weird to pretend to be into your best friend?

      1. Kensou

        Not so much that as the look Becky gives her in response to that. It’s either on the order of “…Really?” or the part of her brain that would very much like Joyce to act like she’s into her rejected friend flaring up.

        Joyce has grown a lot in the past couple of months, but that kind of innocent insensitivity is still wince-worthy.

        1. wwwhhattt

          Ah, I hadn’t really registered Becky’s look there

        2. merbrat

          … Joyce said “weird to *act* like you’re into your best friend…”
          If she said weird to be into… , then yes, it would be cruel.
          I don’t see Becky’s look to be anything other than the panel where
          they are looking at each other. So, it is cool.

        3. Kensou

          We don’t see it the same way, then.

        4. merbrat

          (back from future) Your version was correcter.

  8. Nono

    Wait, is Sal getting an epiphany that she’s into Marcie?

    1. MatthewTheLucky

      No, that convincing Malaya that sleeping with Marcie would be dunking on her is the good winglady thing to do.

      1. Rezby

        Malaya already thinks everything sal does and says is fake. This could backfire tremendously.

    2. Clif

      Sal is getting an epiphany that the stupid-crazy idea would actually work .

    3. Marisa Mockery

      I thought the epiphany is that Malaya’s acting like a third grader and ragging on the girl she’s super into because any attention is good attention. So Sal has to act interested in someone else. But she IS ridiculously shallow so that makes sense too

      1. Kinoko

        Malaya isn’t into Sal (that we know of), but she into making life worse for Sal. Ergo, Sal realizes that if Malaya thinks Sal is into Marcie, Malaya will “steal” her from Sal.

  9. Pablo360

    I should be saying “No Joyce that’s irresponsible” but honestly I’ve been starved for some good old-fashioned Wacky Hijinks™

    1. Yumi

      My question is, does the plan include letting Marcie in on it or not. Because the hijinks will be earlier if she doesn’t know, but also significantly less good.

      1. Yumi

        *earlier = wackier

        1. Opus the Poet

          Damn You Autocorrect!

      2. Clif

        Yep, that’s now the central question.

      3. Reltzik

        Sal’s got absolute no reason NOT to confide this plan with Marcie, so… probably.

      4. thejeff

        Yeah, fooling Marcie into thinking Sal’s into her would be not good.

      5. Seregiel

        Not letting Marcie in on it would lead to Awkward Times(tm) not Sexy Times ™.

    2. Undrave

      This is some Sitcom-grade Hijinks right there! That’s for sure.

  10. Yumi

    Well, I don’t trust Becky’s face in the last panel.

  11. ShinyNeen

    All things considered Becky’s got a pretty good poker face going right about now.

    1. ShinyNeen

      ack, forgot the : (

  12. Diner Kinetic

    LET THE DUMBING COMMENCE!

    1. TachyonCode

      I mean, it kinda just did. This is a terrible, enjoyable idea.

      It has about as much merit as stealing vegetables from a grocery store and trying to sell them back to it.

      1. Reltzik

        So… we expect it to produce results?

        1. Clif

          Produce. Vegetables. Very good. Let’s see. What kind of produce isn’t vegetables. Fruits I guess. Well, I’m certainly not going there. Ok, I’ve got nothing, but the next post will probably be a brilliant pun that’s obvious in retrospect.

  13. MatthewTheLucky

    To be fair, Joyce would never have made it if there was a guy involved. She specializes.

  14. Woomy

    What? No, that’s just gonna hurt Marcy and make her hate you. That’s the opposite of good advice.

    1. DailyBrad

      Depends on if Marcie’s in on it or not.

    2. MatthewTheLucky

      Not if she prefaces it with “I’m doing this to make Malaya jealous because I owe you”, hopefully.

    3. BBCC

      Not if Sal’s honest with her about it. I’m hoping she will be because they just made up and I’m hoping they won’t just leapfrog into another fight.

      1. BBCC

        There’s also the possibility that Sal’s not going to hit on Marcie at all and is just going to tell Malaya she likes Marcie, at which point Marcie will hear about it and (most likely) feel awkward because she doesn’t like Sal like that and will try to tell her that nicely, at which point Sal reveals the whole thing. Marcie will probably face palm a lot but hopefully no hurt feelings.

        1. CJ

          Wasn’t there a moment where Sal looked guilty when it becam clear that Marcie wanted to fuck Malaya and that something she can’t do with Sal (I thought that translated to Maricie is into Sal but not vice versa)?

        2. BBCC

          Marcie DID say ‘I want to fuck her’ when Sal asked what Malaya could give her that she wasn’t currently getting from Sal, but Sal wasn’t feeling guilty (to my reading anyways) – her reaction was “Ohhhhhhhhh. Yeah, ah ain’t doin’ that, no.” because that was the first time it clicked Marcie likes Malaya.

        3. Kinoko

          ^ This. Another implication from that scene, too, is that Marcie knows beyond a doubt that Sal is straight, so she knows sex is something she’ll never get from her. I HOPE that this means even if Sal doesn’t let Marcie in on it (which she should), Marcie knows Sal well enough to be able to tell what’s up.

  15. newllend(henryvolt)

    The “pretending to be into your friend to make someone else jealous enough to pursue them plan.” Does have a possibility back firing.

    1. StClair

      In this case, almost a certainty.

    2. Reltzik

      Scratch out “back fire” and write in “burst the cannon”.

      That’s like backfiring, except EVERYONE nearby gets caught in the blast.

  16. ObiKemnebi

    Now here’s the question:

    To tell Marcie about the Plan and see if she’ll go along with it (which she may not like, even just knowing about it) or to just pretend at Malaya when Marcie isn’t looking (and inevitably result in miscommunication shenanigans where Marcie find out and thinks it’s real)?

    My bet’s on the second one, because shenanigans and drama.

    1. Regalli

      One would be the one that makes sense and doesn’t piss Marcie off… soooo probably two, which will probably end badly.

  17. HeatherJean

    I am probably sleepy (and dopey and sneezy and a few of the other dwarves) but I don’t see the point of “pretend to be into Marcie.” What is it supposed to accomplish?

    1. Yumi

      To convince Malaya to ba-thump Marcie out of her dunkin’ desire.

    2. MatthewTheLucky

      Malaya will then sex up Marcie to dunk on Sal by seducing her crush.

    3. HeatherJean

      Heh. I see from the posts in the last 3 minutes what it’s supposed to do. My mind doesn’t work that way, apparently.

      1. BarerMender

        Yeah, it took me a minute to figure out. My mind either.

        1. Michelle J. Caboose

          It took me a re-reading to figure it out, but only because I misread “Pretend to be into Marcie” as “Pretend to be into Malaya.” Crazy thing is, either of them would totally be a sitcom plot.

    4. Norah

      I’m assuming to make Malaya jealous?

    5. Clif

      Malaya is competitive, particularly with Sal. If Sal goes after Marcie it will be imperative that Malaya must succeed and Sal fail.

      1. Clif

        Wow. Four posts while I’m typing one.

    6. Bagge

      Since the plan has already been thoroughly illuminated by previous posters, let me just say that I love your sleepy-joke.

  18. regina phalange

    …..wait, is Sal’s plan now to get Marcie a Malaya hook-up to get her out of her system? Because that is literally the only way this could seem like a good idea.

    1. Schpoonman

      Sal wants what makes Marcie most happy.

      1. mrnoidea

        Sal wants what makes Malaya most unhappy.

        1. BBCC

          But not at Marcie’s expense. Marcie matters more than hating Malaya.

    2. BBCC

      Sal knows that Malaya will hook up with people she thinks Sal likes. That’s what happened with Joe.

      Ergo, Sal thinks that if she pretends to like Marcie, Malaya will hook up with Marcie, like Marcie’s hoping Malaya will.

  19. Rezby

    Sal, please. This can only go wrong. You’ll end up falling for her for real and you won’t have any idea how to handle this.

    1. BBCC

      …Is that not what AO3 is for?

      1. Clif

        I dunno about that, but if it happened, I’m not seeing the downside.

      2. BarerMender

        Yes, Rezby! Write it!

    2. ninja_jesus

      Honestly, I’m more scared that Marcie will fall for Sal and she wouldn’t be able to handle it.

      Maybe if she asked Marcie to be a part of the plan instead of springing it on her, things will work a lot better.

      1. Clif

        That would be the smart thing to do. What’s the title of this comic again?

        1. Icalasari

          Same time, Sal tends to be one of the smarter ones in this comic so she might try for the not stupid path

      2. Kamino Neko

        Yes, this is way more likely – and has already been hinted at.

    3. Keulen

      Have we seen any reason to believe Sal is into girls? I’m of the opinion that if this plan fails spectacularly it’ll be because Malaya will somehow figure out that Sal is faking attraction to Marcie. Or possibly Marcie will not realize it’s fake and develop a crush on Sal.

      1. BarerMender

        Or possibly Malaya actually has a heart somewhere in all that sand and leather, and she’ll try to push Marcie and Sal together.

        1. Seregiel

          Or Malaya realizes what’s going on, and just answers Marcie’s never passed “do you want to boink? Check: [yes]/ [no]” note with an eye roll and how she thought Marcie was straight with her.

  20. Potatamoto

    YES! Hijinx! Sweet, sweet hijinx! The wackier the better!

  21. Rabid Rabbit

    Becky? Becky dear, in panel 6, we can see you checking out Joyce’s giblets. You may need to be more discreet.

    1. BarerMender

      Oh, man, she is. Stop that, Becky. (Poor Becky.)

  22. Durandal_1707

    Every time I see DD’s slogan, I’m reminded of this little snippet from 2013:

    https://www.nbcconnecticut.com/news/local/Dunkin-Donuts-Employee-Stops-Robbery-With-Coffee–194800331.html

    1. Needfuldoer

      Ya nevah desecrate a fahkin’ Dunks, ked!

  23. Bagge

    I LOVE when Joyce and Becky get to be a double act. And yup, Sal – these two weird, hopelessly romantic busybodies ARE good at what they do. If Malaya thought Sal wouldn’t want her and Marcie to be an item she would fling her tits in her face in an instant.

    1. ShinyNeen

      And we got the fantastic Dorothy+Joyce double-dunking on Mary bit two storylines ago. So now we just need all three of them to combine their powers!

      1. Bagge

        When that happen I will squeee for a week.

  24. Raen

    …how is this supposed to help, exactly? If Malaya’s only real interest in Marcie is to get at Sal, surely this would make her more interested… at best, if word gets around to Marcie, she’ll be conflicted, but for Sal’s oldest friend to think she’s into her now would be knocking a whole new hornets’ nest…

    1. BBCC

      Depends how Sal goes about it. I’m hoping it won’t lead to another fight but you never know.

  25. ANeM

    If they do not pass this scheme past Marcie first it will 100% blow up in their face.

    So it’s going to blow up in their face.

  26. Bagge

    Awww, Becky’s wistful face in the lastpanel.

    Those wounds are still there, but they are healing.

    1. JessWitt

      I don’t know about healing. Looks like Becky’s in for a Joyce relapse.

  27. Cholma

    Sal: “… AMAZING LOVE SLEUTHS…”
    Suddenly, over in Girls With Slingshots Land, Jamie’s ears start burning!

    1. ShinyNeen

      Erin: “Jamie? What’s going on?”
      Jamie: “Th-there’s a case! At a college campus!”
      Erin: “… okay?”
      Jamie: “No! Several cases! Oh my god, so many cases! How is there so much love that needs sleuthing at one school!?”
      Erin: “… because it’s college?”

    2. Marsh Maryrose

      Jamie and Jane are Romance Detectives. Totally a different thing than (((lesbian love) sleuths) | (lesbian (love sleuths))).

  28. ShinyNeen

    Okay, when I stop laughing uncontrollably and think about this plan at least semi-seriously, two sticking points for me are:

    1: Marcie could totally see this as a form of Sal unnecessarily escalating a situation. I don’t think this is on the same level as Sal refusing to back down from fights or anything else she used to do, but I really think she’d rather that Sal let her pursue Malaya on her own?

    2: Marcie seems mostly to have moved on from Malaya? I don’t recall her showing any overt interest since witnessing Malaya walk off with Joe. Plus she was going after Sayid near the end of the last storyline. That doesn’t really prove anything conclusively, but it makes it look to me like Marcie at least isn’t so stuck on Malaya that she’d appreciate Sal intervening like this, whether she’s in on the plan or not.

    That being said I am totally rooting for the high-shenanigans outcome of Sal realizing she totally has feelings for Marcie after all. I ain’t that much of a stick-in-the-mud!

    1. BBCC

      It’s possible for Marcie to like Malaya and Sayid at the same time, but yeah, I’m hoping that Sal talks to her about this first. Or at least goes about it in a way that can minimize potential hurt feelings – like, if Sal just mentions she thinks Marcie’s endearing (which she does, canonically), and Malaya can’t resist showing Sal up like she tried to do with Joe, that’s got very minimal potential to hurt Marcie. So does telling Marcie what’s up beforehand.

      And then while the plan is in motion, I think Sal’s required by the laws of drama to fall for Marcie for real, yes. 😛

      1. Regalli

        I mean, Marcie WAS on the ‘everyone’s a potentially polyamorous bisexual’ squad in the Walkyverse and it does carry over.

        1. BBCC

          Yup. She was in one polyamorous relationship with her squad mates and one monoamorous one with Jason.

  29. Tacos

    Well this is probably gonna end badly. Either that and/or hijinks will ensue.

    1. Marsh Maryrose

      Just gonna put this here for no reason at all

  30. Clif

    The question Sal suddenly considered was “could this wacky idea actually work?” The question she should have considered is “what could go wrong?”

  31. Victor Riley

    As long as this plan is cleared with Marcie first, then go for it. But don’t do covert-cupid. That no bueno.

    1. Madock345

      I’m pretty ok with it only because, as far as I can tell, Marcie really just wants to fuck Malaya and isn’t in it for romance.

      1. BarerMender

        Hey. What if Marcie gets all the nookie she wants and goes away, but Malaya falls in love?

        1. MatthewTheLucky

          Sal’s vengence shall be complete.

      2. thejeff

        Marcie’s put a lot of time and effort into it for just casual sex. At the very least she seems to also enjoy Malaya’s company.

  32. JessWitt

    But isn’t Marcie x Malaya already deconfirmed? And Marcie is after Sayid or something? I’m kinda lost now.

    1. BarerMender

      So far, all we know about Marcie & Sayid is that they’re friends.

      1. JessWitt

        Yeah, nothing set in stone with them yet.

    2. Seregiel

      If other universe rules are in play here, exclusivity is not a need for her.

      1. JessWitt

        Right, right. I forget about poly relationships. Come to think of it, poly has yet to be seen here in DoA.

        1. thejeff

          Only in the background. Grace, Mandy and Sierra have a thing going on.

  33. Meagan

    Does anyone else feel like lately the storylines are just SO GOOD?

    I was introduced to this comic almost two years ago. I binged in…May 2017. Then I’ve been following along, since, sometimes taking breaks for weeks or months then catching up. For a few months now I’ve switched to every day.

    The story has had its ups and downs, for me, in terms of how invested I am in current plotlines and character arcs. I loved everything to do with Danny and Amazi-Girl. The Ethan and Danny teasing was great too, and Danny getting his ukelele.

    I couldn’t really care less about Jason losing his job (largely because my suspension of disbelief was challenged by how it was executed) and Walky getting him a new one.

    And it felt like for a while we were plodding along…once in a while a sighting of a character I actually care about. But ever since things came to a head with Sal and Amber – this comic is just not stopping with giving me a sense of satisfaction. (That code isn’t gonna work huh.)

    Like I sometimes get this icky feeling from consuming media like I’m just being constantly strung along with teasers without ever getting what I really want. And I’ve had that feeling about this comic at times.

    But lately I do not. The characters are really rockin’ my world in terms of their journeys and hijinks etc.

    1. BBCC

      Agreed! Except my reasons for not caring about Jason being fired – I didn’t care because he deserved that, even if Penny herself was bullshitting.

  34. stoodmuffin

    I don”t know if it’s ethical/best way to do things.

    But, this is my new favorite strip and I LIVE for Joyce’s expression in panel 3

  35. Delicious Taffy

    I feel like I’m missing something, here. I can’t place it, but I’m not understanding something important.

  36. Koms

    Becky and Joyce learned from Jamie McJack.

  37. Danielle

    is it time for donuts?

  38. BBCC

    I love the (bass?) guitars on Sal’s closet <3 I know I've said that before but they make me happy.

  39. FirePrincessLily

    Is Sal really into Marcie or is this going to be a “Very Special Episode”?

  40. kilgaen

    Of course, if Marcie’s only pretending to be into Malaya for the same reason, it will definitely backfire.

    Mind you, this is Willis we’re talking about. It will backfire one way or another.

    1. Meagan

      People keep saying things like that and nothing truly bad keeps happening (lately). I get the sense he is actually letting the characters have growth and not-constant-drama for a while.

  41. Bryy

    Do we even known Malaya’s opinion on homosexuality? She seems to just *assume* that everyone is straight. This has the potential to activate some Diet Homophobia.

    1. Questionor

      Not sure on that but this conversation was interesting.
      http://www.dumbingofage.com/2019/comic/book-9-comic/02-but-the-sun-still-shines/overwhelmingly/

  42. Questionor

    I’m confused are they saying Sal should lie to Marcie and pretend to be into her to get closer to her again or are they saying Sal should lie to Malaya and pretend to be into Marcie so that Malaya goes for Marcie to spite Sal? Also unclear if it is the second option whether it includes letting Marcie in on the plan or not.

    1. BarerMender

      Discussed at length above.

  43. Ainara

    What? No. That’s horrifyingly bad advice

    1. BenRG

      It works in romantic comedies and teen fiction which, of course, if the complete length, breadth, height and depth of Joyce and Becky’s actual knowledge in these matters.

      1. Bagge

        EVERY SINGLE MOVIE FROM THE EIGHTIES AND NINETIES WOULDN’T LIE FOR US, WOULD THEY?

        1. Arianod

          What? Of course they wouldn’t!!

          They’d totally lie to us, though.

      2. thejeff

        And honestly, it’s far more likely to work in this case than in most situations where it’s tried, because we already know that Malaya is directly motivated by outdoing Sal.

        I mean, it’s also pretty much guaranteed to backfire in some spectacular fashion, but the chances of it getting Marcie and Malaya into bed are high.

      3. Hielario

        One of the worst parts of that age is figuring out fiction has been lying to you about everything related to romance.

        1. Hielario

          This Walky avatar is giving a very different tone to my words from the one I intended.

    2. BBCC

      Yes, but depending how she goes about it, there’s ways to minimize the potential to hurt Marcie’s feelings, especially if she tells her ahead of time.

      Sal doesn’t care about hurting Malaya’s feelings.

  44. abysswatcher1993

    Joyce and Becky just set off an awful idea to grow in Sal’s mind, and they didn’t need to do an Inception with the help of Leonardo DiCaprio.

  45. BenRG

    I know what you’re thinking Sal because I’m experiencing it too. Ever since this chapter began, it’s almost been as if this is a weird bizarro alternate time-line where most of the rules we expect have been inverted!

  46. TheHabbadasher

    Gonna go out on a limb here and say that Sal probably isn’t thinking of following this whole plan. It wouldn’t really be her style. She’s just reacting to the dawning realization that Marcie has been crushing on her for ages now.

    1. TheHabbadasher

      Or, possibly, to the realization that she actually *is* into Marcie. One of the two, probably…

      1. Shane Wegner

        Seems less likely given Sal presents pretty heterosexual based on what we know of her.

      2. BenRG

        Or, that she actually realises that her life is a Teen College Drama series. Worse, one from Marvel Studios or DC Entertainment, given Amber/Amazi-Girl’s involvement.

  47. Osaru Sensei

    One step closer to the realisation of my favourite Dumbiverse ship, yay!

  48. Shane Wegner

    My brain is getting older and crustier for sophomoric freshman shenanigans, but is the reasoning like:

    1- Marcie crushes on Sal.
    2- Sal pretends to be into Marcie.
    3- Malaya magically develops or maybe already has a preference including women, and or just likes being mean and stealing other people, and strikes up some sort of spite relationship with Marcie.
    4- This… Somehow makes Marcie happy? I mean until she finds out Malaya isn’t into her and it’s just spite and she was used to annoy Sal.

    Going to convoluted lengths just isn’t worth it IMO and just shows they are unduly fixated on Malaya. Malaya does seem to have a lot of confidence and would probably just be like “why do you losers care about meddling in my romance, can’t you just go find your own people to romance if you care so much instead of meddling in my life?”

    Or just as likely “hey weirdos I ain’t into women, I’d say nice try if it weren’t so sad”.

    1. Will D

      1- Marcie is into *Malaya*. She wants to tap that.

      2- (it is Sal’s understanding that) Malaya wants to annoy Sal at all times, to the point she wants to take her place as Marcie’s bestie, but not to the point of bedding her.

      3- Sal wants Marcie to be happy.

      Hence:

      4- (Joyce and Becky believe that) If Sal pretends to be into Marcie, Malaya will try and bang Marcie just to get at Sal, unwittingly giving Marcie what she wants.

      And Sal agrees that would work, and just can’t believe *those two* had such an idea that never occurred to herself.

      —

      Now, none of them is considering the multiple ways such a plan may backfire.

      1. Clif

        Well and succinctly stated.

  49. GUIGUI

    Don’t those plan usually backfire horribly ?

    1. BenRG

      IRL? Yes. In teen romantic fiction (i.e. the basis of Joyce and Becky’s advice)? They have a close to 100% success rate.

    2. JessWitt

      Guess Joyce and Becky never finished watching those movies to know that.

    3. BBCC

      Yup!

  50. Arianod

    Definitely a doomed timeline.

  51. Lone Duck

    “Yeah, it might be weird to act like you’re into your friend.” Poor, poor Becky.

    1. BenRG

      Also, poor, poor Dina who is a rebound and, I suspect, on thin ice in terms to Becky’s commitment if Joyce were to suddenly become available.

      1. thejeff

        Becky’s shown every sign of being head over heels for Dina, despite not being completely over her long crush on Joyce. Joyce has shown no signs of suddenly becoming available.
        I just don’t see this at all.

        1. Kensou

          Same. Who knows if Becky will ever be completely over those feelings for Joyce, but she and Dina seem legit, and I just can’t see Becky treating her like that.

        2. Kamino Neko

          Don’t you know how love works? Even if you’re dating X, if you have even the smidgenest of feelings for Y, that means you’ll throw X over for Y in a hot second, because True Love is both real and greedy.

        3. Jhon

          Oh joy. You’re a Love Sleuth too.

  52. DarkoNeko

    That look Beckie is giving in the last panel

    1. BenRG

      Yeah, she’s not over Joyce by a long way.

  53. Acebender

    Oh, Becky…

  54. L!ghtn!ng

    I could not be more excited for this plotline!

  55. saltchocolate

    Is my memory bad, or wasn’t there a strip sometime long ago where Malaya suggested (possibly with a hand gesture about Marcie’s voluptuousness) that she’s got some hots for Marcie already? Maybe they just don’t know how to broach the subject with each other.

    1. Jay

      I don’t know bout that but I know the reverse happened about Marcie “saying” she wanted to hit that about Malaya

  56. Aelfwine

    I’m a bit confused, do Joyce & Beckie know that Marcie is romantically/sexually interest in Malaya? Did they find that out in an earlier strip?

    1. BBCC

      Nope, Marcie’s just incredibly obvious if you’re not Sal or Malaya.

  57. Deanatay

    My prediction: Sal succeeds in making Malaya super-crazy-jealous of her ‘relationship’ with Marcie. So jealous that Malaya

    *double-Shamalyan*

    breaks up with Marcie, because she’s been attracted to Sal the whole time. Being an ass is how she expresses her attraction.

    1. Ryek Hvek

      Malaya’s attracted to everyone?

    2. BenRG

      So, you’re suggesting that Malaya has a crush on Sal and is effectively pulling on her hair to get attention? Not beyond the bounds of possibility, I guess!

  58. NoOneLikesRobin

    This is a great strip. I like competent Joyce and Becky.

    1. Clif

      We’ve seen a competent Joyce slug an adult. We’ve seen a competent Becky successfully guide legeslation over a cellphone. I like competent Joyce and Becky too, but this isn’t it.

  59. Sharkfin Bangs

    I can’t say with confidence this is my favourite strip of all time, but I can tell you I’m unreasonably excited about it.

  60. C.T Phipps

    Proof positive Sal is every bit as dumb as the rest of the cast.

    1. BenRG

      When it comes to things that we feel deeply, we’re all dumb.

  61. SQUEAK

    I don’t think Sal’s “oh no” is because she realized the plan could cork. I think she just realized that Marcie is doing EXACTLY THAT to her

    1. Charlotte

      Hm, that is an angle I hadn’t considered. But I’m not sure it’s true; Marcie’s behaviour didn’t really look that way to me.

    2. Axel

      We’ve seen Marcie being into Malaya when Sal isn’t there, but that doesn’t mean that Sal doesn’t think that’s what’s happening now

    3. thejeff

      I doubt it. Malaya knows well enough that she’s not into girls and Sal knows she knows it. Plus while the basic jealousy thing may apply, Sal’s never shown the kind of “I’ll do this to beat her out” motivation as Malaya has.

      1. ǝ snow ʍousɐ

        yeah, that’s certainly true. it only really makes sense if jealousy is what Marcie is after.

    4. ǝ snow ʍousɐ

      Yeah, I was wondering if that might be the penny that just dropped. Makes sense as far as “my world’s upside down”…

      First of all, why would ANYONE be into Malaya.
      Second of all, if that is what’s happening, the plan is kind of working already–Sal is spending more time with Marcie to avoid losing her to Malaya. And more time together might be what Marcie really wants.

      Of course, if Sal thinks that’s what’s happening, it’s going to be hard to verify with Marcie — because if she’s wrong and asks Marcie if that’s what’s happening, suddenly Sal’s making everything about her.

      1. thejeff

        Except Sal’s not spending more time with Marcie. Sal was already trying to spend as much time with Marcie as possible. Marcie was pushing her away to have time with Malaya. And then entirely, when they had their fight.

      2. Kamino Neko

        The people within the comic have no incentive to performatively hate Malaya, they can decide that they want to ignore her flaws because they want a piece of that ass, or they can weigh her flaws against her virtues and decide that the flaws aren’t that terrible (yes, they can, even if the readers disagree!).

        1. thejeff

          Or like real people, they be blinded to someone’s flaws because of their attraction, which is somewhat different.

        2. Kamino Neko

          Also an option, yes.

    5. moon

      why not both? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    6. Tan

      I do not buy at all that this is what Marcie is doing, nor that Sal would think so.

      I could, however, buy that MALAYA is doing some strange and twisted version of this: getting with everyone Sal seems to like in order to make Sal jealous of her and thereby turn to like her.

      1. Tan

        ‘like’ is the wrong word here. To want her.

  62. C.T Phipps

    I foresee Sal being entirely okay with sex if it keeps her bestie.

  63. Cmd1095

    This strip is amazing on so many levels. And Sal’s reaction is just so priceless I’m dying here lmao

    1. Zepher Dossier

      Lost it at Panel #5

      1. ValdVin

        The transition in Sal’s eyes from panel 4 to panel 5 really gets it across.

  64. nlips

    I had to read the comments to have any clue what was going on. But some people seemed to get it instantly.

    I was thinking, “why pretend she’s into Marcie? Will this make Marcie like her more and spend time with her? That seems dumb and doesn’t make any sense.”

    The correct interpretation of “This will help Marcie get laid by making Malaya spite-fuck her thinking it’ll piss off Sal” simply didn’t occur to me.

  65. moon

    In the last panel for a second I though Joyce was putting her arm around Becky’s shoulder which if it were true would have been… youch…

  66. not someone else

    I saw this today and immediately thought of Sal:

    https://www.telegraph.co.uk/science/2019/03/18/having-male-twin-bad-girls-study-finds/

    Snippet:
    “Having a male twin is bad for girls, damaging not only their education and job prospects but their chances of a happy family life, new research has found.

    A 30-year study found girls who share a womb with a male twin go on to perform significantly less well academically and socially than girls whose twin is a girl.”

    (They think it’s biological because they did part of the study on twins where the boy died but it’s still vaguely interesting.)

  67. Smiling Cat

    My shenanigans prediction: Sal will attempt this, and Malaya will try to HELP her get together with Marcie.

    1. nlips

      Or Marcie will turn out to have feelings for Sal…

  68. Elsendor

    i am SO here for the wacky hijinks this will inevitably result in oh my god

    1. Elsendor

      granted in the real world it would suck but. listen. wacky hijinks.

  69. jmsr7

    Aikido works with social relationships too. Apparently.

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