150

Fog
Posted on April 30, 2019 by David M Willis
April's second bonus strip is now up at Patreon!  It was SUPPOSED to be the FIRST bonus strip, about SIERRA, but JOYCE FUCKED IT UP. the proper sierra strip will come after we regroup following this fiasco And as always, you can pledge a little extra to see tomorrow's strip a day early, every day!

150 thoughts on “Fog”

  1. Doctor_Who

    “I’ve even seen the Ewok movies, the Holiday Special, the Despecialized Edition, the theatrically released Clone Wars pilot, and The Great Heep!”

    “So you actually bought a ticket for Solo?”

    “For whatnow?”

    1. King Daniel

      The only reason Lucy wouldn’t have bought a ticket for Solo would be because due to the sliding timescale, it would eventually have been in theaters while she was still in kindergarten or something.

    2. Needfuldoer

      The Despecialized Edition is fantastic. I hate seeing practical effects get buried under retrofit CG. Nothing is as realistic as something that was actually on the set, in front of the camera.

    3. Raznaak

      The Holiday Special doesn’t exists…
      It doesn’t. *sob*

  2. Ana Chronistic

    “and then Anakin dies”

    “…I don’t like this analogy”

    1. Doctor_Who

      “No, it’s okay, his spirit survives! But instead of his spirit from when he’s learned his lesson and repented, they retconned it to the younger him from when he was a violent sociopath that murdered children!”

      “What exactly is your point?”

      “I don’t know!”

      1. abysswatcher1993

        Lesson here, dont tamper with old material unless you are doing restoration work. Also, retcons are bad. Homestuck and Doctor Who have suffered from that.

        1. Doctor_Who

          W-what do you mean, we don’t have any retcons!

          Romana just started doing that one day and we don’t know why! Susan went back in time to invent the acronym first! The Doctor claimed to be half human that one time because it was new years on earth, just like everyone is suddenly part Irish on Saint Patrick’s Day!

        2. clif

          I always assumed Dr. Who followed sliding alternate timelines.

        3. ScarvesandCelery

          Doctor Who is literally a show built on retcons.

        4. LiamKav

          Yeah. Retcons can be good or bad, but Doctor Who really isn’t the best example to choose when you want to highlight their bad side. Unless you want remove Genesis of the Daleks from the canon and preferred it when the Time Lords were wise, all-seeing omnipotent beings rather than a bunch of lazy, squabbling petty people who the Doctor was desperate to escape from.

        5. Tawdry Quirks

          But some of the retcons have to exist because of the problems inherent in writing about ‘near-future’ events, then the show continuing well past that ‘near-future’ date.

          Ambassadors of Death was difficult to reconcile with the new series even before “Waters of Mars” effectively wrote it out of canon. One principle the stories generally stick to is that the technology known to the general public should be consistent with that era in the real world (secret tech well beyond what a given time period would have is fine). And a story about the seventh manned Mars mission, which was depicted as having the same amount of media coverage as the Apollo missions, obviously violates that principle, unless you choose to date the UNIT stories much later than 1970s-1980s.

        6. showler

          The only absolute canon in Doctor Who is that they are “a mad[person] with a box”. Everything else is flexible because of that one bit of truth.

      2. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet

        My headcannon is that the ghost of Old Anakin still exists somewhere, forced to wander the galaxy without purpose after being cast out by forces beyond his comprehension, eventually being driven insane and beginning a twisted, decades-long quest for revenge on reality itself eventually resulting in the retroactive obliteration of the Expanded Universe.

    2. Marsh Maryrose

      Darth Vader murdered an entire planet full of people. This is one of the reasons I refuse to acknowledge that the supposed last third of “Return of the Jedi” exists.

      1. Doctor_Who

        That was mostly Tarkin. Not that Vader did anything about it, he just stood there. But the idea that he was basically 2nd in command in the Empire was clearly added later; in the first movie Tarkin’s in charge and Vader comes off more as some sort of enforcer.

        He sure didn’t look very upset about it though, or raise any objections, so he’s still a prick.

        1. Rabid Rabbit

          Well of course he didn’t look upset. He’s only got one facial expression.

        2. Needfuldoer

          Star Wars could use some yellow meme subtitles, like the “cries in Spanish” or “stares in Klingon” ones.

          Vader: [“Nooooooooooooo”-es internally]

        3. LookingIn

          Vader destroyed a planet to keep the rebellion from getting the plans for the Death Star before Tarkin destroyed Alderaan…and the vast majority of the people on that planet were Empire personnel….that alone is enough to justify the reaction

        4. King Daniel

          If you’re referring to Scarif, that was Tarkin again. Vader wasn’t even on the Death Star at the time – he was on his personal Star Destroyer.

        5. King Daniel

          And if you’re referring to Jedha, that was Tarkin again; Vader wasn’t even in the same system at the time.

        6. Tan

          So what you’re saying is that Tarkin is misunderstood and just needs a hug?

        7. Ryek Hvek

          a hug, and Two Pretzels

        8. Ed Rhodes

          “So, what you’re saying is, I destroy planets because, underneath my mean, heartless, exterior, I just want to be loved? Is that it?”

        9. showler

          At least no poetry.

        10. Seregiel

          Part of the rule of two in the Sith is that you hide it, so they often put people in positions where they look higher valued than they are.

        11. thejeff

          Except nowhere else was it hidden, even in stuff that takes place earlier. Plus the Rule of Two wasn’t even a twinkle in anyone’s eye at that point. “Sith” didn’t even appear in the movie.

          The relationship between Vader and the Emperor simply wasn’t clearly defined when the original Star Wars was filmed. or wasn’t defined as it became in later movies.

      2. Vulcanodon

        ‘Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny, consume you it will…’

  3. ValdVin

    My wife is an LCSW and has not seen all the Star Wars. Is that something which will help her help clients?

    (I’m kidding, I think.)

    1. Jon Rich

      LCSW?

      1. Yumi

        Licensed clinical social worker

        1. ValdVin

          Yep. And before anyone asks, we didn’t meet that way (plus it’s really unethical). I see a totally different therapist 🙂 .

        2. Stephen Bierce

          Psychosomatic
          That Boy Needs THERAPY
          Purely psychosomatic
          That Boy Needs THERAPY          …

        3. ValdVin

          I thought my wife (and I) had heard all these songs, but I had to search that out. Good one!

        4. Stephen Bierce

          When first I heard it it was truly a WTF? moment. But I agree it’s an inspired and entertaining piece.

        5. Stephen Bierce

          Did I ever tell you the story about Cowboys?

        6. brute

          wow i actually remember that song from hearing it in high school

        7. Hilzabub

          Ok, hadn’t heard that, but I really like it. Excellent selection

        8. Kamino Neko

          Huh. A song – from Australia – that samples Wayne & Shuster…never thought I’d see that. (Little trivia…Frank Shuster was the cousin of Joe Shuster, co-creator of Superman. Johnny Wayne, on the other hand, was no relation to John Wayne – though neither of them were either John, nor Wayne, by birth!)

    2. LookingIn

      Only if they need something to focus their attention onto to do something constructive…trying to figure out hte geopolitical situation of the old republic, the empire, and the new republic/First Order should be enlightening 😀

    3. Marisa Mockery

      Only if she specializes in nerds

  4. Yumi

    But what are Ruth’s feelings on sand

    1. Doctor_Who

      Canadians don’t have any, but they have over 400 feelings for snow!

      1. clif

        But the thing is, nobody else can tell the difference.

        1. Roborat

          Just like Blue Steel and Magnum.

  5. Catman

    Two of my favorites. I hope we see more of them.

    (Ruth is cool too I guess)

  6. AnvilPro

    Even the animated short one

  7. Bagge

    Lucy is knowledgable in the ways of the world.

    In the way of MANY worlds, in fact.

  8. MM

    Huh. Lucy is apparently this universe’s version of Danny when it comes to Ruth.

  9. Woomy

    Thanks for spoiling Starwars

    1. Yumi

      I had a real hard time not spoiling some things when we watched A New Hope in English class during my senior year of high school… because kids who didn’t know Star Wars kept making comments about shipping Like and Leia.

      1. Marsh Maryrose

        Hey, sibling marriage worked for the Targaryens. Aegon the Conqueror married both of his sisters. Daenerys’s parents were siblings, as were her grandparents, and Dany was raised to assume she would marry her brother when she came of age.

        Well…maybe it didn’t work out so well for Dany’s father, aka “The Mad King.”

        1. 3oranges

          Thanks for spoiling The Magician’s Nephew

        2. Marsh Maryrose

          I never thought about this before, but it is true that Frank and Helen were the first King and Queen of Narnia, and they were the only humans in Narnia, so subsequent Kings and Queens of their line were…?

          Man, the Bible allegory was even sharper than I imagined.

        3. Jean Cabot

          It’s canon that their children married nymphs and river gods.

        4. Andy

          Also, the Calormenes came from somewhere across the sea, so there had to be people somewhere.

        5. Needfuldoer

          On the other hand, Charles II of Spain.

        6. Ntrovert60

          The original poster child for the dangers of inbreeding…

        7. Deanatay

          Or, basically, Joffrey.

        8. Marsh Maryrose

          Also, King Tut, the last of the Thutmosids. I suspect that GRRM might have used the Thutmosids as one of the models for the Targaryen family tree.

      2. CJ

        The Leia Luke Han triangle was a nice moving force of the original three movies. I really don’t get why anyone can get hung up on siblings that haven’t grown up together and are both of age crushing on each other.
        Incest taboo is around to keep kids safe from older relatives. Out of that context, it’s just a guilt trip trap that makes religions happy. (When it comes to having kids together, there is a slightly higher probability of both having the same recessive gene than with couplings of people living in the same area for centuries and no one sees this as a reason to not fall for the girl next door).

        1. thejeff

          In fact, assuming Force-sensitivity is genetically linked, such pairings would likely result in more and stronger Force users. Anyone who’s worked with animal selective breeding should know it’s a great way to reinforce desired traits. You just have to kill your culls – or at least keep them from breeding.

          It would be kind of surprising if no one had ever tried a breeding program.

          Assuming they are genetically linked, which the movies both imply and try to move away at various points.

        2. hof1991

          Breeding for super mind powers is one of the plot lines of Dune.

        3. CJ

          Marion Zimmer Bradley went down that way in the Darkover novels, too. especially Storm Queen.

        4. MatthewTheLucky

          Actually, in the E.U., the ancient Dark Jedi were known to practice that with the Sith species.

        5. Delicious Taffy

          Species? What’s going on over in that EU?

        6. BBCC

          The Sith stole their name from a species that the Lords of the Sith once enslaved.

        7. Roborat

          After Disney fucked it up, I no longer care.

        8. Jean Cabot

          No, this is weird.

        9. Delicious Taffy

          Okay, I see your point and understand what you’re saying. On the other hand, have you considered not promoting incest as Good, Actually?

        10. CJ

          I am promoting that crushes, love and sex between consenting adults is a normal thing and people who drag out hitherto unknown genetic connections to shame that need to quit it.

        11. drs

          The ingrained incest taboo, Westermarck effect and all, is to keep close relatives from having kids, period, age doesn’t matter. If there’s a lethal recessive in the family then the odds of two carriers having a dead kid is 25%. Beyond that, if you let incest happen it won’t just happen once, and the odds of inbreeding problems shoot way up. A lot different from the girl next door. Plus societies often have mechanism to encourage you to go find boys from another band or village and *not* the one next door.

          Broader incest taboos are socially constructed for various reasons. Many Americans find any degree of ‘cousin’ off-putting while Victorians often married their first cousins. Some cultures rule out children of your mother’s sister but not those of your father’s brother, or such… neither of which can be described as “keeping older people from younger ones”.

        12. Charlotte

          Umm… I hope this isn’t a serious comment. If you have children with a close relative (parent or sibling in particular) the chances of serious genetic defects are *significantly* increased, even if there was no previous incest in the family. It is thus a really bad idea.

          (Obviously over several generations, first or second cousins having children will eventually compound the problem, too.
          To avoid this, e.g. Iceland has a data base where couples can check how closely they’re related before having children, because the population is so small. It makes sense for society to ensure that genetic material gets nicely mixed.)

        13. Viktor

          Depends on how you define “significant risks”. Brother-sister relationships have lower increase in risk for genetic disorders than a woman over 40’s increased chances of having a child with Down Syndrome.

        14. Charlotte

          (This is a reply to CJ’s comment btw)

          I’ll add something for illustration just in case people think that the child of close relatives having a genetic defect is still low: In Germany there was a case a while ago where two siblings had four children together, *three of which* were disabled from birth (two mentally and physically, one had a genetic heart defect that could be operated).

          I don’t think it should be illegal for any two consenting adults to have a sexual relationship per se, but they shouldn’t have their own children if they are closely related (adoption still works).

        15. CJ

          I wouldn’t advise siblings in any of Europes monarchie’s to try and have children together because those lines have had cousins marrying for centuries and that creates a higher probability of them carrying the same recessive gene than normal. But when it t comes to that, highly isolated villages in the Alps don’t fare much better.
          The Icelandic solution makes sense, because the population has been isolated from other genepools for a long time.
          But still that is no reason to shame adults who crush or fall in love with someone they happen to be genetical siblings with which both of them didn’t know when they met.
          @Charlotte: source of your story? It sounds totally yellow paper to me.

        16. CJ

          And:Arguing about who can and who can’t marry for reasons of genetic viability sounds too much like Nazi Germany’s Euthanasie Programms to be palpable.
          So please, do keep children safe from all sexual predators, especially those in-family and leave adults to make their own decisions about love, sex and having children or not.

        17. CJ

          PS: If both parents have a recessive gene that will cause a genetic defect to come into force with children who get the recessive gene from both parents, the likelihood of a child with that combination is 25%.
          Most families do not suffer from genetic defects running in the family and for those, that number is irrelevant because there are no dangerous recessive genes to pass on in the first place. So please to not confuse probability to pass on a known genetic defect with both parents affected at least with a recessive gene for it with probability “any given individual has a genetic defect they can pass on”. Those are two entirely different things.

        18. Inahc

          Now I understand why Godwin’s Law was invented. 😛

  10. Kravis

    “Even ‘The Ewok Adventure’ and ‘Ewoks: The Battle for Endor’?”

    “ESPECIALLY ‘The Ewok Adventure’ and ‘Ewoks: The Battle for Endor’.”

    1. Greylurker

      …..why is a little curly haired blond kid (like blond afro) popping into my memory when you bring up the Ewoks….oh god did I watch those films?

      1. Matthew Davis

        Because that’s Cindel, the audience surrogate who is orphaned and then saved by the Ewoks. It also had Wilford Brimley.

  11. abysswatcher1993

    The only sin Lucy has committing is liking the Teen Titans Go! series. The movie is okay, but the series is a condescending guilt trip made to mock the fans of the original show and good narratives. I knwo there’s toxicity in fandoms and gatekeeping, but Teen Titans Go! was a mistake, and it seems to be the only show getting too much screen time. What happened to Adventure Time kind of shows from the 2010s?

    1. Catman

      I ended up watching quitec a bit of that show while babysitting, and I’ve got to be honest and say it’s not horrible. It’s not good, but it has its own kind of charm.

      1. Regalli

        It’s a bit too fast-paced with its wacky for me, but then I haven’t watched the ‘Beast Boy works at a fast food joint that’s a front for cow-stealing sentient tofu aliens’ episode in years and I remember enjoying that one as a kid.

    2. DailyBrad

      TTG’s honestly one of those shows where when they hit on something hilarious, it really lands, but yeah, you have to sift through some real obnoxious to get to it sometimes. Its biggest sin is just being on TV way too much.

    3. Nono

      They’re called Steven Universe.

      1. JessWitt

        Also new She-Ra. It’s great.

        1. BBCC

          OK KO Let’s Be Heroes is also absolutely fucking adorable.

        2. Scoutinthenight

          I have watched one episode of OK KO. It happened to be an episode where the showrunner gave a sort of ending to his webcomic “RPG World”, which I hadn’t thought about in almost a decade. It was a nice little surprise.

        3. Inahc

          I’ve finally started watching Star vs the forces of evil 🙂

    4. Rabid Rabbit

      Does this Lucy like them, or is this entirely the Shortpacked! one? (Honestly can’t remember if it’s come up here.)

      1. Wizard

        There’s a TTG Starfire poster on the wall, and I doubt it’s Billy’s.

      2. Marsh Maryrose

        Also, her social media handle is Starfire11.

    5. timemonkey

      Shows that are good require time and effort which cost money so the network would rather have something cheap and quick to produce. It’s a necessary evil that frees up funds for the good shows.

    6. Greylurker

      While mostly true on TTG, I find the entire thing is redeemed by “Night begins to shine”. So what you will, but those episodes were awesome

      1. StClair

        IMO that’s not really redemption so much as “these episodes are totally unlike the rest of the show and/or actually good.”

      2. Cattleprod

        Came here looking for that, yes, the show gets a free pass forever just for that song.

      3. Scoutinthenight

        I was glad to see this comment. That episode is pretty great. I also enjoy Cyborg as the “old man” bringing up things like synth-wave and (in a different episode) VHS vs. Beta.

  12. King Daniel

    Why aren’t Dexter and Monkey Master tagged? There’s tags for both of them.

    http://www.dumbingofage.com/tag/dexter+monkey-master/

    1. GoblinScribe

      I WAS GONNA SAY

  13. Deadjolras

    Is it too early to start shipping Ruth and Lucy?

    1. Catman

      Luth? Rucy?

      1. King Daniel

        Lesslenn? Glennsick?

        1. clif

          Carla and Lucy has more legs.

        2. Catman

          Yes. Want. Give.

    2. Geneseepaws

      Yes, it is too early because some of us are not done with shipping the Ruth-Billie boat. Yeah, it may be unlikely, but Ruth pulling the anti-Titanic (un-Titanic?) and rising above her addiction gives me hope that Billingsworth will rise to meet her love. Because “Wuv, twooo wuv,…”
      (Yeah, it seldom happens that way in True life, but hey! Comic!)

  14. foamy

    Look sir, nerds

  15. Opus the Poet

    Actually, this is a pretty good analogy for Ruth’s situation

    1. Opus the Poet

      Also, there’s a poster of TTG Starfire next to the Monkey Master poster.

  16. Rafe

    Well that clinches it, Lucy is now my favorite.

  17. Kern Wallace

    Truly Star Wars is the greatest source of life advice in our times.

    1. BenRG

      Although I have heard many who claim to follow the philosophy of a man called James T Kirk.

      1. CJ

        So they are sleeping with green women? http://egscomics.com/comic/2014-12-18

      2. Roborat

        What, fuck everything that moves?

  18. William Leonard Reese Jr.

    Lucy: It’s such a shame that they never put a sequel for SOLO into the works, that movie was great even if it ended on such a downer ending for Han and Kiera.

  19. DailyBrad

    Lucy’s so goddamn cute.

    I am thinking this is one of my favorite gags with her yet, though I am also very partial to her being so upbeat, Joyce thought Lucy was parodying her.

  20. sunflowerofice

    I got a movie theater poster for episode three. I only saw it once though because I got paid to.

  21. Needfuldoer

    So Lucy constantly uses pop culture references as a relatable example to get her point across. I can relate to that specific nerd insecurity.

  22. Keulen

    I really want to know what Lucy’s favorite Star Wars movie is.

  23. Matthew Davis

    I have no memories of Episode I, really, because I broke up with an ex that night right after the and the thinking running up to that moment was preoccupying me.

    1. Marsh Maryrose

      There is no such thing as Episode I. It does not exist. It is as real as Candle Cove.

    2. Needfuldoer

      That’s probably a better memory, to be honest.

      If you really want to see it, look up The Phantom Edit, or just play the pod racing game instead.

      1. HeySo

        See also: https://www.shacknews.com/article/110486/star-wars-podracer-unreal-engine-4-remake-is-stunning

        1. Needfuldoer

          :O

          It’s… beautiful! Better download it before Didny buries it!

      2. Marsh Maryrose

        Once you take out the wily Asians, the slave-owning Jewish merchant, the Caribbean Stepin Fetchit, the terrible, awful dialogue, and the your-genes-are-your-destiny message, there really isn’t much left except a visually stunning pod race.

    3. timemonkey

      It’s not as bad as people make it out to be but it’s definitely flawed. For some reason Lucas wanted to make this one entry into a kids movie so he shoved in a lot of forced humor and slapstick.

  24. BenRG

    Lucy the insightful nerd! Seriously, I understand what she is saying: Ruth is having to reassess everything about her life and the people around her from outside the neurochemical ‘cell’ that she’s been in for many years.

    Probably shouldn’t have used pop-culture references, though; outsiders don’t always get them!

  25. Bagge

    Fun fact, Lucy has almost the same expression when she quotes Star Wars as when she quotes Harry Potter.

    It’s her quoting face.

    http://www.dumbingofage.com/2019/comic/book-9-comic/02-but-the-sun-still-shines/stow/

    1. ValdVin

      Billie is the kind of closet nerd who would think, but never say out loud, “I’m pretty insightful. I’ve seen every Star Wars / Harry Potter”.

    2. ShinyNeen

      She does seem pretty pleased whenever her experiences actually line up with the situation at hand.

      1. Bagge

        Same with Joyce, come to think of it – only it’s harder to spot because it happens so rarely.

        1. Bagge

          This is a memorable occasion
          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-5/01-when-somebody-loved-me/better-3/

  26. DarkoNeko

    Ruth “Honestly, I’m not sure what I expected”

  27. HeySo

    Hmm. There are only three Star Wars films, so I’m really not sure why she’s bragging so hard about having seen all of them? I mean, all three combined are probably only as long as a single Jackson film, it’s not like it’s a big deal or anything.

    1. Delicious Taffy

      Phantom Menace, The Empire Strikes Back, and The Last Jedi. Those are the only ones.

      1. Schpoonman

        I’ve heard worse takes on Star Wars, certainly.

  28. BenRG

    I just love the idea that Ruth sat there for a short while, trying to get mad and finally deciding… “Yeah, I am kind of like a Force Sensitive that has come back from the the Dark Side, aren’t I?”

    Maybe we should start calling her ‘Revan’?

    1. BBCC

      Or Quinlan Vos.

  29. Pickacard

    She does have a point, it is like that.

  30. Alan in DC

    Now that the fog has lifted and she’s learning how to take control, her next encounter with Grampa Dickwad might have a markedly different outcome.

  31. whatthelewis

    besides the obvious star wars reference, i’m wondering what game carla is playing. any guesses? my guess is diablo 33

    1. ShinyNeen

      Maybe Katamari? All the little people are like bugs beneath her!

    2. C.

      The alt-text yesterday said she mains ROB in Smash, so that’s a clue right there.

  32. psychoandy

    Long time reader (since the beginning), first time commenting.

    Just wanted to say I loved the detail of adding a Starfire poster to Lucy’s room, given her history with the character in Shortpacked!.

    ( https://shortpacked.com/comic/math )

    1. Bagge

      Agreed. That’s a great callback

  33. bunivasal

    So uh… “Mushroom and the Forests of the World” is a cute cartoon, and Mushroom is exactly 100% what I imagine Robin to be.

    precisely

  34. Jade

    I’m imagining that she also watches all the cartoons because god damn it, I refuse to be alone

    1. Jade

      (I know plenty of other people watch all the cartoons, but I no longer have friends that do </3)

  35. Enesthi

    Man. I can’t even remember being on meds for my mental stuff anymore. Got off them in college because I had enough control and not enough money without my parent’s insurance. Kinda wish I could try them again now. Seems nice.

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