The collection of wonderful Joyce Faces grows. Girl needs her own emoji set.
And sorry Joyce, you already got your daily miracle allotment when there was no line for the shower and Amazon began a sale on sweatervests. You’ll have to die tomorrow.
She can’t. She can just eat the big plate of crow she’s made for herself. Joyce is going to get in trouble and there is nothing she can do about it.
Clif
Yes, but in the meantime she and Jacob get taken out to eat by Jacob’s brother. Raidah has been looking forward to being taken out to an adult restaurant by Jacob’s brother. This is a gift that keeps on giving.
Joyce (looking for distraction): Look, there’s someone on the wing! The other wing of the building I mean!
Jacob: Why would I ever date Joyce? She’s Hitler! (pulls off her mask)
Joyce: (Flails around in shock, breaks Harrison’s glasses)
Harrison: No…there was time now…it’s not fair!
Jaime: Dammit, if he can’t read now, how’s he going to help me with this? I can’t reach the high shelves in the kitchen (throws down copy of To Serve Man).
That was Astounding! Or was it Amazing? I shouod go into the basement and check!
“Oh, Hi Joyce, what are your u doing down here?” ”
Trying to get myself out of a hole.”
It sounds a tiny bit misogynistic, like Joyce was a conquest, but it could just as easily be a turn of phrase and I might be a mite sensitive, hence I’m being cautiously optimistic.
Woomy
Nah, it’s the same thing as saying “he’s a great catch”. There’s nothing gendered or offensive about phrases that basically boil down to “you’ve found a good partner.”
Sunny
Yeah, english is quite consistent in that it uses fishing metaphors for all combinations of sexes/genders when it comes to finding partners. Of course you could question what this says about the views of society as a whole on romance and partnership, but at least you get to do a fundamental critique then since it applies all ways and against all groups.
Geneseepaws
We are a mechanized society, why are we using hunter-gatherer metaphores? This makes no logic? And why not a meta-5?
Deanatay
So, if we were to find a modern, industrial metaphor for finding a good partner… something custom manufactured?
“Dude, nice bespoke!”
Seregiel
Well, we’re also very much into breads and circuses at the moment. By “pull” he meant draw of the deck because he was a huge Magic the Gathering fan growing up. No fishing metaphors here! Just nerds!
He Who Abides
MtG brothers and sisters for life!
thejeff
Not that simple. Phrases that boil down to innocuous meanings can still take on negative connotations through use.
It might be regional or generation, but “pull” has strong connotations of casual sexual conquest to me, not more serious relationships. You’d go to the bar and try to pull a girl for the night.
It’s mostly English slang isn’t it? At least as I’ve heard it.
Sunny
Intent matters. That’s my opinion anyway. If there’s nothing inherently problematic with a phrase and it was not intended as in any way demeaning, then the “problem” is entirely on the listener’s end. What might sound somewhat negative to one person might sound neutral to another and somewhat positive to yet a third person depending on where they’re from. Even if the three of them otherwise have identical views on everything (politics, social issues, taste in music and movies, whatever). To make matters even more complicated, connotations change over time, and what was once considered normal and polite can change to be considered rude. Or the other way around, something that was extremely rude or even hostile becomes normal to the point where everyone’s fine with it. And often you’ll have some of both at the same time.
That’s why I don’t like to get connotations involved, they are too dependent on individuals to make any useful statements about language in general unless you get a few thousand people and do a large study. Even then you could only make statements about what connotations certain phrases carried at that point in time, 30 years later things can have changed drastically already.
thejeff
And yet, people will draw inferences from connotations. That’s how language and communication work. There’s no avoiding it.
It may be hard to pin down formally, but we all do it everyday.
Exactly. Joyce should be getting away for maximum effect. Raidah and Jacob meet while Harrison still doesn’t know the truth (Jacob will likely refuse to talk about Joyce), causing Harrison to get a completely wrong impression of his brother.
But then maybe it won’t go as bad as possible for once…
Sunny
Raidah might not be coming since she expects Jacob to be in class. Even Jacob expected himself to be in class. Of course she will join them at some point for maximum DRAMA, but that’s beside the point that she might not.
IIRC: Popeye the Sailor was tying his father into a hammock, and said, “You’ve buttered your bed, now lay in it.” His dad was being forbidden to go drinking and carrousing. (Hello: Sailors!)
For me, Scott’s Tots was funny but almost unwatchable. This is much easier because each moment happens after a 24 hour time gap for you to get used to the last one.
For me, it’s always less painful reading than watching something like this. (And probably watching cartoons than live action.) There’s a bit more distancing effect and the empathy is more intellectual.
180 thoughts on “Buying”
Ana Chronistic
Joyce will quickly find out if it’s truly possible to die of embarrassment
win/win?
Stephen Bierce
It isn’t called mortification for nothing.
Clif
Mortifying of Age.
Doctor_Who
The collection of wonderful Joyce Faces grows. Girl needs her own emoji set.
And sorry Joyce, you already got your daily miracle allotment when there was no line for the shower and Amazon began a sale on sweatervests. You’ll have to die tomorrow.
Meagan
A Joyce emoji set is what I want for Christmas, except now. For real. What do we do to convince Willis this must be a thing?
TemporalShrew
Sorry, Joyce, no elevator can go high enough to get you out of the hole you’ve dug for yourself.
Lingo
Father knows best.
Chris Phoenix
Ain’t no mountain high enough, ain’t no river wide enough…
Nikol Geier
You gonna run to the rocks, but the rocks will be melting when you run to the rocks…
Kyrik Michalowski
No Joyce, you made this mess. Now you have to fix it.
He Who Abides
Your avatar just seems perfect for this post.
Keulen
I’m not sure how easy it’ll be for Joyce to fix it at this point.
JetstreamGW
She can’t. She can just eat the big plate of crow she’s made for herself. Joyce is going to get in trouble and there is nothing she can do about it.
Clif
Yes, but in the meantime she and Jacob get taken out to eat by Jacob’s brother. Raidah has been looking forward to being taken out to an adult restaurant by Jacob’s brother. This is a gift that keeps on giving.
Deanatay
She dug this hole, now she has to brunch in it.
BiOnyx
Man, I hope this doesn’t turn out to be an ep of The Twilight Zone!!
Doctor_Who
Joyce (looking for distraction): Look, there’s someone on the wing! The other wing of the building I mean!
Jacob: Why would I ever date Joyce? She’s Hitler! (pulls off her mask)
Joyce: (Flails around in shock, breaks Harrison’s glasses)
Harrison: No…there was time now…it’s not fair!
Jaime: Dammit, if he can’t read now, how’s he going to help me with this? I can’t reach the high shelves in the kitchen (throws down copy of To Serve Man).
Madock345
This reads a bit like one of those markov chain stories
Needfuldoer
Who gets wished to the corn field?
woobie
Raidah.
Geneseepaws
That was Astounding! Or was it Amazing? I shouod go into the basement and check!
“Oh, Hi Joyce, what are your u doing down here?” ”
Trying to get myself out of a hole.”
DSL
Number 12 Looks Just Like Her.
He Who Abides
At least she knows it was wrong. That’s something.
Right?
Diner Kinetic
Rule #1 of lies: bad people need to use the stairs!
abysswatcher1993
Joyce isn’t bad, she is just stupid and in denial.
Diner Kinetic
I mean she’s not like, inherently bad; more just doing bad things- either way, there is no greater boon for villainy than a flight of fetid steps
JetstreamGW
I thought rule #1 of lies was that you need to tell better ones?
He Who Abides
It’s actually “write them down so you can keep track”. You’re thinking of Rule #2.
Anywhere
OBVIOUSLY this charade is going to continue until the worst possible moment.
AntJ
I bet the chicken fingers will be too spicy http://www.dumbingofage.com/2018/comic/book-8/04-of-mike-and-men/numerous/
Nono
Hmm. “Great pull, bro” isn’t exactly the most respectful of praise, but I’m keeping a cautious eye on Harrison.
BiOnyx
That Joe icon, tho’.
Woomy
I don’t see the issue.
Nono
It sounds a tiny bit misogynistic, like Joyce was a conquest, but it could just as easily be a turn of phrase and I might be a mite sensitive, hence I’m being cautiously optimistic.
Woomy
Nah, it’s the same thing as saying “he’s a great catch”. There’s nothing gendered or offensive about phrases that basically boil down to “you’ve found a good partner.”
Sunny
Yeah, english is quite consistent in that it uses fishing metaphors for all combinations of sexes/genders when it comes to finding partners. Of course you could question what this says about the views of society as a whole on romance and partnership, but at least you get to do a fundamental critique then since it applies all ways and against all groups.
Geneseepaws
We are a mechanized society, why are we using hunter-gatherer metaphores? This makes no logic? And why not a meta-5?
Deanatay
So, if we were to find a modern, industrial metaphor for finding a good partner… something custom manufactured?
“Dude, nice bespoke!”
Seregiel
Well, we’re also very much into breads and circuses at the moment. By “pull” he meant draw of the deck because he was a huge Magic the Gathering fan growing up. No fishing metaphors here! Just nerds!
He Who Abides
MtG brothers and sisters for life!
thejeff
Not that simple. Phrases that boil down to innocuous meanings can still take on negative connotations through use.
It might be regional or generation, but “pull” has strong connotations of casual sexual conquest to me, not more serious relationships. You’d go to the bar and try to pull a girl for the night.
It’s mostly English slang isn’t it? At least as I’ve heard it.
Sunny
Intent matters. That’s my opinion anyway. If there’s nothing inherently problematic with a phrase and it was not intended as in any way demeaning, then the “problem” is entirely on the listener’s end. What might sound somewhat negative to one person might sound neutral to another and somewhat positive to yet a third person depending on where they’re from. Even if the three of them otherwise have identical views on everything (politics, social issues, taste in music and movies, whatever). To make matters even more complicated, connotations change over time, and what was once considered normal and polite can change to be considered rude. Or the other way around, something that was extremely rude or even hostile becomes normal to the point where everyone’s fine with it. And often you’ll have some of both at the same time.
That’s why I don’t like to get connotations involved, they are too dependent on individuals to make any useful statements about language in general unless you get a few thousand people and do a large study. Even then you could only make statements about what connotations certain phrases carried at that point in time, 30 years later things can have changed drastically already.
thejeff
And yet, people will draw inferences from connotations. That’s how language and communication work. There’s no avoiding it.
It may be hard to pin down formally, but we all do it everyday.
BBCC
Also – while intent does matter, so does impact.
Joe Moose
I’m cackling at this embarrassment. You make that bed, Joyce!
Danielle
oh that snowball looks PRETTY BIG
Needfuldoer
And it hasn’t rolled even halfway down the mountain yet!
Ron
Exactly. Joyce should be getting away for maximum effect. Raidah and Jacob meet while Harrison still doesn’t know the truth (Jacob will likely refuse to talk about Joyce), causing Harrison to get a completely wrong impression of his brother.
But then maybe it won’t go as bad as possible for once…
Sunny
Raidah might not be coming since she expects Jacob to be in class. Even Jacob expected himself to be in class. Of course she will join them at some point for maximum DRAMA, but that’s beside the point that she might not.
BBCC
Nope nope nope. You buttered your toast, now you have to sit in it, young lady.
Fart Captor
That’s not how toast works!
BBCC
I said what I said.
Yet_One_More_Idiot
Nope Joycy, you buttered your cat’s back, now you have to wait and see which side it falls to the ground on, little miss.
BBCC
^ This one gets it.
He Who Abides
The butter is always greener on the other side of the lamb’s tail?
AntJ
lol like Joyce eats anything buttered… that’s two foods touching
BBCC
She eats buttered noodles. 😛
Sunny
With meatballs!
Seregiel
That’s like a gem fusion though. They aren’t touching so much as merging into a greater entity.
Clif
Now I want a picture of Joyce sitting in butter on a large bed of toast.
Geneseepaws
IIRC: Popeye the Sailor was tying his father into a hammock, and said, “You’ve buttered your bed, now lay in it.” His dad was being forbidden to go drinking and carrousing. (Hello: Sailors!)
Beef
This is like Scott’s Tots on steroids 🙁
NerdHerder
Hey Mr. Scott,
What you gonna do?
What you gonna do,
Making dreams come true?
3oranges
For me, Scott’s Tots was funny but almost unwatchable. This is much easier because each moment happens after a 24 hour time gap for you to get used to the last one.
thejeff
For me, it’s always less painful reading than watching something like this. (And probably watching cartoons than live action.) There’s a bit more distancing effect and the empathy is more intellectual.
Woomy
Lol, Jacob’s gonna hate you now, Joyce
Kravis
Oh, Joyce…
If wishes were horses…
Chris Phoenix
…Joyce would be trampled underfoot. Fatally.
tim gueguen
Joyce finds herself in a situation similar to one from one of those secular sitcoms her parents wouldn’t let her watch.
ValdVin
“I learned how to handle delicate social situations from a little show called Three’s Company.”