144

Goodness
Posted on December 4, 2014 by David M Willis

144 thoughts on “Goodness”

  1. Jen Aside

    Tomorrow, the make-out that no one saw coming.

    YUP–CONNIE AND ARNOLD

    1. liahansen

      YUP- BLAINE AND GALASSO

      1. Tunaro

        I-I’m trying to think of a word that displays both an urge to vomit and unholy terror.

        1. Doctor_Who

          This help?

        2. Tunaro

          Yeah, that’s about right.

        3. LazerWulf

          We need to get David to upgrade the DoA comments to Disqus (like Shortpacked has) so I can give you upvotes for this.

        4. David M Willis

          NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NEVER

          DISQUS BURN IN HELLLLLLLLLL

        5. Packy

          *upvote*

        6. Plasma Mongoose

          I might be reading too much into this Willis, but I am beginning to think that you might not exactly be a big fan of Disqus. 😀

        7. JWLM

          Really? Ri-ight. I suppose that you also expect me to believe the Amazi-Girl isn’t Carla in disguise, right? And that Ruth and Billie don’t actually hate one another?

        8. la6uɐ mous

          Or that Carla is based on a sentient automobile.

        9. Mattyos

          THE WILLIS HATH SPOKEN, DISQUS SHALL BURN!

        10. fogel

          Disqus delenda est

        11. Northcutt

          *downvote*

        12. la6uɐ mous

          Yeah, IntenseDebate is much better as far as ratable commenting goes.

        13. Kelly

          Thank you

        14. captainswift

          Disqus is an upgrade? I thought it was a torture device of some sort.

        15. PbjZ

          Disqus is out like the discotheque.

        16. Deanatay

          Disqus? More like Disqusting.

        17. FinalFire64

          I imagine it to sound like a water balloon in a blender

        18. Plasma Mongoose

          Will it blend?

        19. Disloyal Subject

          You already know the answer to that question. “Everything blends… Except Chuck Norris.”
          I still wish they’d skipped that joke.

    2. Jen Aside

      also, fuck depression and abuse, making good people believe they don’t deserve happiness >=(

      1. Opus the Poet

        Absotively.

      2. begbert2

        Nobody “deserves” happiness, because it’s not something that you earn. But it’s always a wonderful thing when one of us unworthy can stumble our way into it.

        1. slicedtoad

          what? Why can’t you earn it? I really prefer my happiness to come from achievements.

        2. winter

          If begbert2 means what I think they do, it’s not that you can’t be happy because of your own actions and achievements, but rather that people shouldn’t feel they have to earn or deserve the happiness that comes to them.

          There’s something that’s inherently wrong about the way Amber’s thinking in panel 4, that she (or anybody) could do anything that meant they didn’t deserve goodness or happiness in their life. Even assholes who drive people away with their shitty behavior deserve happiness, although the fact that other people also deserve happiness and don’t deserve to have to put up with their shit takes precedence.

        3. begbert2

          This is pretty much it. Thinking of happiness as something that can be earned inherently includes the premise that it’s possible to fail to earn it. I don’t believe that’s possible. However you achieve happiness, be it through winning an olympic medal, winning a board game, playing a board game, losing a board game, or just opening your eyes one morning and realizing you’re happy despite having done nothing at all, you cannot be more or less worthy of the happiness due to your actions or lack thereof. It’s not something you can earn; it’s an emotion that you have or you don’t.

          As I write this I realize it sounds like that “grace of god” bullshit that some people spout off about that. I apologize for that; I was probably tainted by my upbringing. The whole point is that happiness is not something you should feel guilty for having under any circumstances, because it is not something you can (fail to) earn, and it’s not a gift from anybody that you can owe them for. It’s just something that happens to some people who manage to get their neurons to dance in that particular way, the lucky dogs.

        4. Jen Aside

          I do think “deserve” is a crap word for pedantic reasons, but basically, yeah, “I don’t deserve to be happy” is the biggest bullshit ever and fuck that

    3. Dreadhawk177

      Time for a secret between Amber and Ethan, on top of the others.

      1. Kaiden

        Amber and Ethan perform a secret on top of the others?

        1. Opus the Poet

          Well they tried performing a sex after prom, which did not work out too well. It ended up as one of the red flashbacks.

    4. Yotomoe

      So Sierra and Marcie are finally gonna make out. Bout time.

      1. Mr k

        Marcie’s devoted to Sal. She won’t cheat on her.

        1. Yotomoe

          I choose to not believe that cuz it’d make Sal sleeping with Jacob to be kind of an awful thing to do.

        2. CommunistCanada

          I assume you meant Jason. And Marcie and Sal are just friends.

        3. Disloyal Subject

          “Just friends”? I do not understand…

      2. John

        Pretty sure they already did that in the other universe.

    5. Sean Franco

      Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?

  2. Plasma Mongoose

    Goodness me!

  3. Raine

    Suffering Flag raised. Especially with all the Danny stuff in the last 2-3comics.

  4. Tunaro

    Stop it you two. Stop being adorable. I can’t handle this much feels at once right now.

  5. Flimsyfishy

    Well… time for sads.

  6. newllend

    I wonder how long its going to stay like this.

  7. Yotomoe

    That was Ethan’s subtle way of saying you have terrible taste in comics, Amber.

  8. sun tzu

    Oh, Amber.
    You deserve far more good than Ethan.

    1. Yotomoe

      AND Danny.

      1. sun tzu

        No, Danny I’m fine with. It’s DoA Ethan I despise (and I say that as a guy who often defends Shortpacked!Ethan).

    2. winter

      Life’s not about deserving things. Life’s so often full of shit that people deserve and should treasure any good they can find.

    3. Usayasha

      Ethan’s actually very good at being what other people need. He’s just terrible at fulfilling his own needs, and causes damage when he tries.

      He’s a great friend, but oy does he need a babysitter. Or a wise sage of some sort.

  9. timemonkey

    Nice to see them together without Danny there to cause sexual tension.

  10. dailybrad

    Amber is being somewhat generous, given a lot of the bullshit Ethan has subjected her to sometimes with his attempts to separate himself from, well, himself, but I am glad that they have one another in their lives all the same.

  11. Dean

    Thinking about Danny is strengthening Ethan’s point.

    1. wolfie

      oh my god

    2. Yotomoe

      Is that what the young folk are calling it these days?

      1. Boomwolf

        That among other things.

        1. Jen Aside

          I swear, we’re fast approaching the slang event horizon at which all words are somehow related to sex

        2. cesium133

          I’ll avoid discussing my trilobite if you avoid discussing your Efimov trimer.

          (hopefully neither of those are already slang, but they probably are somehow)

        3. Disloyal Subject

          Trilobites: ribbed for pleasure.

        4. tyersome

          … well I had a look at the Wikipedia article for Efimov states and read:
          “predicts an infinite series of excited three-body energy levels when a two-body state is exactly at the dissociation threshold.”
          Sounds a bit like what people keep suggesting for Amber, Danny and Ethan to me!

        5. Malchus

          Put just the right inflection in anything, and it’ll become innuendo.

        6. fhqwhgads

          In YOUR end-o.

        7. JWLM

          Welcome to the comments section. You must be new here.

        8. tyersome

          I thought that was a black hole all peri-pubescent boys entered … some never come out 😉

        9. Pantheon the Mantheon

          Oh, they come out alright. They just fall back in every 7 seconds.

        10. tyersome

          I like the thrust of your argument …

        11. GamaranSepudomyn

          That sounds like a disturbing innuendo all by itself.

        12. tyersome

          I do try to rise to the occasion.

        13. tyersome

          … not that getting a rise out of Ruth is necessarily sex related …

        14. sun tzu

          I realized as much back in junior high school.

  12. Leorale

    Aw, Amber’s face in panel 3!
    I’m so glad they are friends.

  13. JessWitt

    Aw, nice to see their friendship reaffirmed. Hope it can weather the incoming storm.

  14. GoogerGeiger

    Yay, feels!

  15. CommunistCanada

    Next Page, Joyce walks in. Calling it now.

    1. winter

      I know, everything is going too well. Somebody has to come ruin it.

    2. Airyu

      This is exactly what I was thinking too, ahhh I hope not though. Hopefully Joyce is still in class.

    3. WeezerLuvr3030

      No Joyce, it’s okay! It’s just the shirt. See?

  16. Anders

    How is Ethan so well-adjusted when he’s talking about other people’s feelings and yet such a train wreck when it comes to his own

    1. Yotomoe

      How is Ethan a teenager?
      How is Ethan a human.?

    2. Khaner

      Why do plumbers have leaky faucets?

      1. Jen Aside

        Why do firemen wear red suspenders?

        #amidoingitright

        1. neeks

          Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near?

        2. TheZachariah

          +1

        3. Mitsukara

          Birds appear over Amazi-girl’s head when she sleeps? Clearly, her secret identity is Mahoro Andou. It’s so obvious!

        4. GamaranSepudomyn

          No, she is clearly a zombie.

    3. neeks

      Everyone lives in the eye of their own personal drama hurricane. It’s easier to have perspective about someone else’s problems than your own.

    4. JWLM

      How is Amber (as Amazi-Girl) so empathic and giving as she was to Joyce, yet so utterly, totally broken and self-hating as Amber?

      1. John

        Because Amazi-Girl is Amber recreated specifically to be awesome in all the ways that Amber perceives herself to suck?

    5. Usayasha

      It IS scientifically proven that people give better advice to others than themselves.

      (Wish I could find that dang study that showcased it. Oh well, here’s a song about it.)

      1. Deanatay

        The word you’re looking for is ‘bias’. While a person may be considered to have more information about himself than any other person would about him, so much of that information is distorted by bias as to make it useless for making any informed decision about him. This is why, when I need information about someone, I prefer to ask their close acquaintances, as their info tends to be less biased.

  17. Tandel

    I can neither confirm nor deny the existence of nascent tears swelling on my face place.

  18. Khaner

    And the truck is coming down the interstate…

  19. Rabid Rabbit

    Ah, so Ethan actually has a good side. I honestly think this is the first time (in either universe) that I’ve thought that.

    1. Khaner

      Are you kidding? That’s a Transformers 2007 poster in his room.
      He is pure evil.

  20. Don't Mind Me

    I need that shirt!

  21. Idon'tcarenomore

    As much crap as has transpired between these two, yeah they are basically okay with each other as friends.
    And good for each other in that respect I guess.
    You have to take your friends where you find them.

    1. neeks

      So you’re saying don’t take them to a corn maze at midnight on an overcast new moon?

  22. Yotsuyasan

    Aw, man! I want to say something supportive towards Amber, but feel it might be too horrible a juxtaposition with my Gravatar…

    1. winter

      You should say it anyhow, Yotsuyasan! We’re all very logical *snrk* We know you’re not really Joker-Blaine.

      …we’re pretty sure anyhow.

      1. ninja_jesus

        Joker-Blaine? I think you mean… Bloker.

        1. Usayasha

          I think you mean… Jane.

        2. Tenn

          I think you mean… Jocaine.

    2. Jackson

      You’ve made your terrifying bed, and now you have to sleep in it.

    3. Opus the Poet

      Yeah, your grav is just too horrible to use when posting about Amber…

  23. TheZachariah

    So wait, there will never be any amount of goodness she doesn’t deserve…

    So does that mean that there will be some amount of goodness some day that she does deserve? I kind of see what Amber’s talking about, semantically there just isn’t much compliment going on there.

    1. Usayasha

      While a double negative, it technically still says that no amount of goodness is too good for her. Grammatically sloppy? Sure, but so are one word sentences like, “Totes.”

  24. Zaxares

    And now… Ethan and Amber will share a spur of the moment’s kiss for old-time’s sake, and Danny will walk by at JUST the wrong time.

    *DRAMA TAG STRIKES AGAIN*

    1. timemonkey

      The drama tag repressed drama. If you’re going to reference the other universe do it properly.

      1. Usayasha

        Perhaps the slot that the Drama Tag was pulled from?

        *DRAMA SLOT STRIKES AGAIN*

  25. Insanenoodlyguy

    Each page like this just makes me hope all the harder that one day Amber walks in to her boyfriend dick deep in her best friend, or vice versa. Whichever is the boy’s preference. It’s ambers face that will do it for me

  26. kishimobot

    Ethan, you fool, that only makes her stronger

  27. John

    This kind of thing is why I think these two could work with Danny as a triple, not just two couples. They do love each other, even if Ethan doesn’t want to have sex with Amber.

    1. Ashley

      I am keeping my fingers crossed and hoping this actually does happen.

  28. Lord Geovanni

    Hugs Bosom indeed

  29. Aeron

    Re: alt text:

    [Coupling complete – Receiving goodness]

    …That sounds so much worse than I thought it would. Referring to the hug.

    >_>
    <__>

  30. SKRen

    Hmm, Hugs Bosom… Higgs boson?

    1. Bill

      Yeah.  We’ve already been over that.

  31. Bagge

    Honest, open and supportive interaction between friends who sorely need it. You kids keep this up!

  32. skdk

    I hope they fall in love even though ethan is gay ;-;

    1. Shadow Eagle

      guess you missed their backstory… they were dating in highschool when he came out to her.

  33. Shadow Eagle

    Her shirt needs to be worn by more of the female populace. 😉

  34. dun dun dun

    Incoming: NSFW threesome with Ethan, Amber and Danny!
    There’s just so much “tension” between each 2 of them…

  35. MrBurrows

    So, this is mostly outta nowhere, (probably just because she was Amaza-Girl’s back-up a lot) but Carla should be shown to have spider-man bedsheets at some point.

    1. chisci

      “You’ve always been more goodness than I’ve deserved.”

      Pretty selective memory there, Amber. This is the guy you defended throughout summer, I’d say that’s plenty effort to “deserve” the best of him -and he still fucks you up often, so I don’t even agree entirely. Either way, you worked hard to keep him safe back home, of course he’ll have your back still.

      “Amber, no. There will never be any amount of goodness you don’t deserve”

      Ethan, you are aware this advice applies to yourself, too, right? You deserve goodness as well, you should try to find what goodness is to you and seek it. Please just… stop for a moment, look at your life, look at your choices, and make better ones for yourself so you stop making yourself and everybody else miserable. You don’t have to be a boyfriend for Joyce to be there for her, just like you’re not a boyfriend to Amber anymore and you’re there still. Even if the gay thing were overpowering, being out doesn’t mean being camp, so you could let it not overpower anything else. Not that people will care if you were camp and gay, like, these are young nerds you’re associating with, they’re not going to shun you like that at all, what the hell. Just… [walks away in frustration, unable to stop ranting at a fictional character who cannot and would not listen]

      1. chisci

        FUCK WHY WAS THIS A REPLY I DID NOT MEAN FOR IT TO BE A REPLY I’M SO SORRY

        1. chisci

          I’LL SEE MYSELF OUT OH MY GOD

        2. Dragon_Nataku

          *starts covering chisci in duct tape*

          Duct tape fixes everything

        3. Clif

          If only the dinosaurs had had duct tape.

      2. TheGarbageFairy

        Ughhh, yes, this. Ethan and Amber are both super frustrating! I never thought I’d say this, but I think Danny might be my favorite character right now.

    2. chisci

      IN ANY CASE I AGREE WIH THE BEDSHEets but I can’t think of an opportunity to show them

  36. randomcityink

    The Feels

  37. OmegaDez

    Why is Amber so cute?

    Why am I under the impression that this unusual love triangle might turn into a threesome? Would Amber and Ethan be okay with sharing Danny? Could it actually fix their problems?

    1. Bagge

      Well, Amber is not Danny’s girlfriend so I don’t think she would like to see Ethan and Danny get into a relationship and stay friends with them. Amaziegirl might, but she doesn’t seem super into making a long relationship with Danny either. I think this one will be mostly up to Danny

      1. Oberon

        Yeah, that whole “Hands off, you’re not dating Amber” thing is just a little bit pretty freaking psycho.

        Amber isn’t Danny’s girlfriend, and yet here she is, not dressed up as AG, asking Ethan for his opinion of her boyfriend. Sure, she never uses those words, but it’s all over the context. Of course, she may not have explained her psycho separation of personalities to Ethan.

        1. Disloyal Subject

          I don’t think she meant it as character separation so much as wanting to avoid giving anyone watching enough dots to connect. If Danny is dating Amazi-Girl, but is plainly physically comfortable around Amber, someone might wonder if they aren’t one and the same.

        2. Oberon

          Yeah, yeah. Oh, noes, Danny isn’t dating AmaziGirl! That’s Danny! He couldn’t possibly be interested in Amber!

          It’s fairly pathetic.

  38. Jinxed44

    If this was a TV show it would have the title “Everyone Wants to Bang Ethan”. Ethan would be played by Ray Romano.

  39. Theluxland

    I feel so bad to ship Danny and Ethan because of Amber.
    First she loses a guy to homosexuality, then she will loses a guy to homosexuality PLUS the fact that they will end up together

    1. la6uɐ mous

      *bisexuality

      1. la6uɐ mous

        Danny’s feelings for Amber are real. Yes, Danny x Ethan will probably happen, but not until he loses sight of those feelings, which is probably not anytime soon.

  40. Oberon

    Ethan: “Amber, you deserve all the goodness of me stealing your boyfriend.”

    1. Michael

      And it’s gonna send her to the dark side.

  41. Vangeln

    And you’re good for him too.

  42. Jadedcynic

    And replies like that just strengthen Ethan’s point, Amber…

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