313

Home
Posted on February 12, 2016 by David M Willis

313 thoughts on “Home”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    “Big BwotherJoyce!”

    1. Schpoonman

      NO.

      1. gkheyf

        holy friggin crap! your ‘disapproving joyce looking up’ gravatar is spookily fitting!

        1. Jay Eff

          Yeah, it makes it look like Joyce got some Adult Swim viewing under her belt when she was a kid!

          (don’t tell her mom..)

        2. Clif

          i’ve watched Adult Swim a few times over the years, but I can’t help thinking there’s some kind of cultural reference there I’m not getting.

        3. Spring

          Fullmetal Alchemist.

        4. Pan

          Maybe a reference to the “dog” from Fullmetal Alchemist. Do not watch that episode on Netflix. Straight up horrifying.

        5. Captain Button

          A dad way worse than Blaine or Toedad. Or Gendo Ikari, for that matter.

        6. Someone

          Fullmetal Alchemist does seem to have an evil dad theme going for it, I mean the main villain is called Father, for crying out lou!

        7. KarkatTheDalek

          It occurs to me that Hank could probably pass for Shou Tucker if you gave him glasses and maybe gave him a bit of a hair cut…

        8. GreyDefender

          Don’t even go there, Karkat. Last thing we need is a light-haired chimera.

        9. Schpoonman

          It’s from when Sarah tried to give Joyce $20 for cussing. It’s appropriate for many situations.

    2. Russ

      do not

    3. seventhsword2

      Guess I am the only one who literally laughed at this until my lungs hurt

    4. Tyler Durham

      That was… that was mean.

    5. Spencer

      This comment chain is a mess.

      Like the one Scar made out of the Ninadog :V

      1. Ana Chronistic

        is Chimerajoyce out of the question then or

        1. Captain Button

          We might get Carla’s soul bound into a car….

    6. Mattyos

      I actually want to gut you like a fish for this…

      1. Schpoonman

        Me too. =(

  2. Captain Button

    So has the dog taken over No Flashbacking! duty?

    1. inqntrol

      “Warning! Anti Flashbacking dog, do not even think about it!”

    2. LeslieBean4Shizzle

      **rereads a random shitton of Shortpacked!**
      **thinks back about the first time she read Shortpacked!**
      **realizes that she is herself flashbacking**
      **imagines Robin leaping out to stop me from flashbacking, possibly with lesbian makeouts**
      … I’ll be in my bunk.

      1. Emperor Norton

        Damn, now I want Robin leaping out to stop me from flashbacking, although in my case, the makeouts would not be lesbian…

        …Still, I’ll be in my own bunk for a while.

        1. Emperor Norton

          Dammit! I confused Robin with Roz for a second there. Ignore my entire stupid post. I apologize for it!

  3. Psychotic Mantis

    Awwwwwww.

    We all know this is gonna end in tears, though, right?

    1. Kayla

      yeah :'(

    2. Captain Button

      Duh! Willis!

    3. Lia47

      next strip, the dogs turbulent history of drug abuse is revealed

      1. tim gueguen

        He’s one of Ruth’s best booze sources.

        1. Cerberus

          Really shouldn’t have trained him to be a sterotypical comic strip mountain rescue dog.

        2. Dana

          What is drinking age in dog years anyway?

        3. Spidergirl

          One regular year is seven dog years, right? If so, a little under three years.

        4. Imp

          If in the UK, a little under three years.

        5. Ana Chronistic

          a little under one, actually–animals mature much faster than people, so one year = ~18, each thereafter = ~4

      2. Plasma Mongoose

        So the dog’s a mule then.

    4. Plasma Mongoose

      So Snoop going to have an Old Yella moment then?

      1. JustCheetoDust

        Euthanasia Was the Case

    5. John

      Check the hovertext.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        The most depressing thing about any show featuring animals is that if it’s more than a decade ago, the chances are, the animals starring in it are dead.

        1. Reltzik

          Well, if it’s a dog or a cat, sure, but if it’s a longer-living animal like a whale…

          … huh. According to Wikipedia, Free Willy died in 2003.

          Well, okay, that’s just one datapoint. The Star Trek IV whales…

          … *wikipedia* were robots.

          So let that be a lesson to you. Only fall in love with ROBOT animals!

        2. Disloyal Subject

          Praise the Machine.

        3. Plasma Mongoose

          Sea mammals like whales and dolphins live on average far shorter lives in captivity than they do in the wild unlike almost every other creature that ends up in a zoo.

        4. maarvarq

          Sorry, but I can’t resist this … but are those robots still in one piece?

        5. N0083rP00F

          Yes, disassemble ALL OVER THE PLACE!

        6. JonasofAtlantis

          Is it, though? I mean, the animals don’t care, and I don’t spend a lot of time mourning the loss of Aaron Burr and Julius Caesar when reading about them.

          There’s nothing inherently sad about things having finite lifespans, chances are that animals used as TV actors all hit the upper edge of their breed’s lifespan, technically they’re probably doing better than most humans on that count.

        7. Chris Phoenix

          Finite lifespans are sad. The death of a person is like the burning of a library.

        8. DarkVeghetta

          Depends on the library. The one in Alexandria was a real shame, but the one in the next town over… eh. Also: little new libraries!
          But yes, finite lifespans are unfortunate, but necessary.

        9. Andrusi

          Huh. I never really thought about the library reproductive cycle before.

        10. Captain Button

          Terry Pratchett could write good book about that. If he were still here. 8~~~-({

    6. Steampunkette

      I suspect Mom is heading to the Hospital, or something.

      No response on return of her hubby and youngest daughter?

      Could be dead.

      Or banging the neighbors.

      1. GreyDefender

        Or banging the d-…never mind, I don’t think this is the right kind of crowd for that humor…

        1. Reltzik

          ….. do I even want to know what IS the right kind of crowd for that humor?

        2. GreyDefender

          My best friends, apparently.

  4. inqntrol

    D’awww, that dog is so cute!

  5. Stephen R. Bierce

    Snoop. Dog. Dog. Snoop.
    Wait a moment.
    https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10207082969610004&set=a.1567195857180.2115034.1153939353&type=3

    1. Lia47

      i think it MIGHT be a reference to something else

      1. Captain Button

        Wasn’t there some famous comic with a dog named Snoopy?

        1. Someone

          Sparky, wait your talking about the comic strip…and yes this comment is entirely made for me to brag about my peanuts knowledge

        2. StClair

          you mean Li’l Folks, right?

    2. marianne

      If a Joyce comes to visit you, drop it like it’s hot, drop it like it’s hot, drop it like it’s hot!

  6. MapleAmber

    Dogs are the best <3

  7. John

    You wish you’d gotten to give Joyce that much tongue, Becks.

    1. Lasenna

      Awww geez, that revolts me. Joyce, for heaven’s sake, please turn your head or close your mouth! You literally already have dog drool all over you teeth.

  8. gkheyf

    becky can empathize with this dog

  9. ozaline

    The font makes me think of Soggies!

    Soggies may drool!

    1. GreyDefender

      We don’t talk about the Soggies anymore. Don’t you remember what happened ?

      1. GreyDefender

        …as a web design student, that’s embarrassing.

      2. Deanatay

        dab dab dab

  10. Lan

    I hereby declare Snoop as best dog.

  11. miados

    for some reason i thought she would have a cat over a dog.

    1. Someone

      I can see you have not read Roomies

      1. miados

        you are correct sir

        1. Someone

          Danny is a cat person! Which is ironic because his personality is that of a big overtrusting puppy.

        2. miados

          I heard someone say dog owners are like cats and cat owners are like dogs once

    2. -Sentinel-

      A dog seems appropriate for the bubbly, enthusiastic Joyce.

  12. Yotomoe

    Becky, I can’t help but feel like that comment’s a tad inappropriate.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Comedy works on inappropriate.

      1. Kintrex

        Becky works on inappropriate.

    2. Cerberus

      Maybe. It could have also been about being that excited to see her after a long absence. Especially given the circumstances of her second visit to IU.

      1. Emperor Norton

        Or it could even have been that Becky’s also been “attacked” by Hobbes Snoops in the same manner herself when visiting Joyce at her home.

    3. evan

      More like getting crap under the radar, with Joyce’s dad right there.

      1. DarkVeghetta

        A proud tradition.

    4. Spencer

      Yeah, I’m hoping Cerberus is right but my initial reading of it was “lol remember when i kissed you without your consent that was rad.”

      1. thejeff

        I can’t really see even Becky thinking that. Not so much for the consent issues, but for the “And then my heart broke” issue.

        She might make a joke about it, but it would be more obvious and painful.

        1. Cerberus

          Yeah, I don’t think that was the intended usage, largely for the reason you bring up. I could see it potentially being a “sigh, yeah, I’ve wanted to pounce on Joyce and make out with her licky style” kind of comment. I dunno, she just looks too casual and wistful for it to seem like she’s reliving when she got rejected and she’s in comic been extremely affected by finding out about Joyce’s assault and how her surprise kiss could have evoked that.

          I mean, she’s like been super respectful of boundaries with everyone, checking in before making moves and letting others make first moves largely because of that, even for things she used to do regularly with Joyce such as hug her. So it just seems like that particular interpretation would be out of character for where Becky is now.

        2. Spencer

          I mean, even if it’s just “yeah I wanted to do that too”, that’s still something Joyce has asked Becky to stop saying to her. Becky ain’t wrong for carrying a torch but Joyce is entitled to not having comments directed at her.

          Which is why I’m agreeing with your interpretation, that she’s just referring to how happy she was seeing Joyce again for the first time in weeks, because otherwise Becky’s being kinda lame.

        3. Sam

          Given the giant “SLOBBER! SLURP!” letters I am inclined to believe she is actually referring to the kiss.

          Becky puzzles me exceedingly, so I could be wrong.

  13. Mr. Mendo

    Poor Becky. That dog will get to second base with Joyce before she does. :/

    1. cesium133

      All the way to cuddling!? What’s next, meeting the parents?

      1. Tenzhi

        There will likely be heavy petting…

        1. heyman

          Snoop is a heavy pet?

        2. Bagge

          *can’t decide if that comment is genius or very stupid*

        3. Spencer

          It’s the perfect grav for that comment, though.

        4. DSL

          Or, you know, just funny.

        5. Sam

          STOP FATSHAMING THE DOG!

        6. John

          That only leads to trouble…

        7. N0083rP00F

          Lets make it double.

        8. cesium133

          To protect the world from Ross’ face-shin…

        9. Kryss LaBryn

          And seat-wetting.

        10. Captain Button

          “I love you, you love me …”

        11. thejeff

          More, more, more!

    2. Someone

      Will Joyce give birth to 8 wish granting pearls

      1. Someone

        If you get the reference you get a cookie. From your own cupboard, payed for with your own money.

        1. Someone

          Wait shit, the pearls don’t grant wishes, they become children…anywho

          https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nansō_Satomi_Hakkenden

        2. EvilMidnightLurker

          I got it, but since you spoiled it there’s no way I can prove that now…

        3. Someone

          I believe you

  14. Falcon

    See Joyce? That dog will love you unconditionally. Unlike your mother.

    1. Thrabalen

      Well, that went zero-to-dark rather quickly.

    2. Dara

      Thanks, GlaDOS.

  15. Kayla

    I’m terrified of what Joyce’s mom is going to say. Joyces father seems like the calmer parent.

    1. Ruthmost

      “Starting tomorrow, you will live in the church.
      But now is exorcism time. Hank, bring enough rope and holy water for these 2 lambs lost to Satan.”

  16. Ctrl+C D@

    I don’t trust that rock in the front lawn. Looks like it’s up to no good.

    1. Kernanator

      It’s waiting for the perfect time to break in and rob the Browns’ home.

      1. Ctrl+C D@

        After the Pioneers rode off with all his friends he’s been waiting for the longest time to get some revenge on the humans.

        1. Steampunkette

          Those gravatars are perfect for that talk!

    2. Bagge

      It’s spying on Becky, waiting for the perfect time to get to Dina.

      The Space Rocks thought they got all the dinosaurs, but they missed one…

      (Oh, and all the birds of course, but space rocks can be a bit dense)

      1. Cerberus

        Bobdamnit, Jasper.

        1. Bagge

          I got the reference!!!

          Clod.

      2. DarkVeghetta

        “rocks can be a bit dense” – *grooooan* xD *applause with eyes closed and head held down*

        1. Bagge

          *bows*

    3. Captain Button

      Probably involved in satanic rock music.

  17. Paul

    Where’s mom?

    1. tim gueguen

      Hiding with the rest of the prayer squad waiting to ambush Becky.

  18. Ash Ketchup

    IT HAS BEEN AUTUMN FOR YEARS NOW

    1. Psychotic Mantis

      #comictime

    2. Cerberus

      Eternal Fall… just getting darker and darker as time goes on.

      1. StClair

        Winter is coming.

        1. Cerberus

          Awww, that’s awesome for Winter. I know she was having trouble with that for awhile.

        2. Captain Button

          It was the ice cube trick that did it.

        3. Reltzik

          She’s just slow. Some people just come at different paces. Winter always comes after Autumn, and Autumn always comes after Summer.

        4. DannyZebra

          But who comes first?

        5. Tabula Rasa

          Third base!

        6. Bicycle Bill

          The chicken or the egg.

  19. Chrysalis

    Has Joyce learned nothing from Calvin and Hobbes?

    1. Psychotic Mantis

      Apparently not. Neither has her dad, but it looks like Becky finally caught on. Now it’s just a matter of time before Joyce becomes Spacewoman Stiff.

      1. JonasofAtlantis

        If Hank starts telling her blatant lies about how the sun is actually the size of a quarter and sets near Phoenix, I feel that can’t really do anything but improve the character further.

        1. John

          … and the world is only six thousand years old, and dinosaurs lived
          beside man, and once the whole world was entirely covered in water and the only survivors were breeding pairs that this one dude caught and put on a boat…

        2. StClair

          Betcha she won’t buy the one about the past being in black and white, though. She’s seen Superbook!

      2. Amazi-Stool

        The logical next step after becoming a fighter pilot!

    2. Bicycle Bill

      Or Fred and Dino?

  20. TPman

    Dog’s got a weird bark, sounds just like “honey”.

    1. begbert

      That’s Hank. He walks fast.

      1. CandidCanid

        Faster than the speed of panel borders.

  21. Moonshine McGee

    Oh my god, the basketball pole and the nextdoor neighbors with the useless fence, the ranch with a bay window and garage.

    Willis, your childhood is middle america.

    1. Psychotic Mantis

      YES.

      1. Someone

        That has been made expressly clear

    2. CandidCanid

      That’s not a bay window, that’s a picture window! And we’re talking about Indiana here, what did you expect?

  22. Jezi

    Oh dear. Mom being gone is not a good sign.

    My money says she’s either refusing to be in the house with The Lesbian, or fetching backup for the conversion therapy. Leaning more towards the latter, since there would have at least been a conversation with Hank in the former case and he wouldn’t be asking around about where she is.

    Or Willis is pulling a Milholland and she’s dead in the backyard after a completely unexpected massive stroke.

    1. Captain Button

      You are thinking of a different tragic backstory over in Questionable Content.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        I don’t remember any massive strokes in QC, and haven’t read Milholland’s works very thoroughly. Mr. Whitaker didn’t have a stroke, he put a gun to his head amd squeezed the trigger.

        1. Jezi

          I’m thinking of S*P where we have all this foreshadowing and hinting that Davan’s dad Fred is falling seriously ill and hiding it (which he was), but in the middle of it he wakes up one morning and his wife has passed unexpectedly in her sleep. (I don’t recall if her cause of death was ever mentioned or what it was, ‘stroke’ was just the first thing to mind.)

        2. Thrabalen

          Not gonna lie, that comic crushed me the day I read it. It was wonderfully crafted misdirection… “Fred’s sick, Fred’s sick, FAYE’S DEAD.”

        3. Jezi

          I swear I just sat there with my jaw hanging open mid-gasp for like ten minutes when I read that. I could just hear that little tremble in Fred’s voice. Randy is a bastard of epic proportions.

          It’s actually made me really worried. My dad is 60 and in generically poor health, but my mom’s family is riddled with heart disease. If he died, she would suffer financially, but without her his life would literally fall apart. [/downer]

    2. Leorale

      I think she’s baking cookies! (Or some other favourite food of Joyce.)

    3. Steampunkette

      Banging the neighbors.

    4. Carolyn

      It probably is a sign of something dramatic coming…though I’m holding on to the slim hope that she’s just in a back room or the bathroom or something and didn’t hear them come in.

    5. hof1991

      Chekhov’s mom. Carol not being there to welcome her daughter and husband home is significant. Has she left rather than be seen to support an “evil lifestyle”?

      1. thejeff

        Hopefully it’s just a fakeout/room for happy scene with dog. She’s actually in the kitchen making Joyce’s favorite meal and she’s just pulling something off the stove so she can’t come out so quickly.

        What? I can hope, right?

    6. Kryss LaBryn

      I figure there’s a small chance she and the brothers are about to jump out and yell “Surprise!!” This being Willis, though, it’s only a small chance.

      If it happens, it will be followed by terrible things.

  23. syd

    :-/

  24. Synnerman

    Fee fie fo fum, I smell the scent of an intervention. 🙂

    1. Cerberus

      “Becky, when exactly did you choose to ruin your family with your evil demonic lesbian ways?”

      “What? I came in here for an argument.”

      “Oh, sorry, this is abuse.”

      1. Captain Button

        What makes a wholesome Christian college girl want to be a mouse?

        1. John

          Now-age-appropriate mouse boys and/or girls?

      2. EvilMidnightLurker

        “What a stupid concept.”

      3. 3-I

        That might be the best use of a python quote I’ve seen in years.

      4. anonymsly

        Awesome Python quote!

    2. JonasofAtlantis

      Unlikely, since Hank seems to be making an effort to be supportive of the wrong side and didn’t know Becky was there until she asked for a ride.

      1. No Name

        Ah, but Hank called ahead, to warn Carol of that haircut, and Carol could have gathered up an intervention between then and now without Hank’s knowledge.

  25. Cephalo the Pod

    Ehh, let’s calm down folks. Carol’s new character art has her in an apron and wearing oven mitts. She’s probably busy in the kitchen.

    1. Psychotic Mantis

      Making Bible-themed brownies/cakes.

      PLOT TWIST!

      1. Captain Button

        Does Holy Water burn lesbians?

        1. Cerberus

          Well, we’re definitely going to find out!

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          Only if by Holy Water, you mean Heat Balm and they attempt to use it as a lubricant.

        3. Tenn

          Weeeeell…

    2. Amazi-Stool

      So she currently is roasting Hansel and Gretel?

  26. Cerberus

    Hey, at least the scam artist pastor got a sweet ass car outta the deal… I mean, mumble mumble, something about God and faith and… yeah, no, it’s just awful no matter what. *appropriate gesture of support*

    1. Cerberus

      Whoops… the comment I was responding to disappeared.

      1. Peduncle

        It’s happened to me too. You were entirely correct about the Inca diodes, though.

    2. TheNinthShader

      *middle finger towards the pastor*

      1. Disloyal Subject

        …Do I want to know? It’s not like my faith in humanity isn’t already in rough shape.

  27. iain

    She’s gone to get the pastor and her friends. They’re gonna stage an intervention.

    1. Cerberus

      Exorcisms are a nice look this time of year.

      1. Captain Button

        Have to get that demon out before the end of October, or else …

        1. JustCheetoDust

          …outbreak. Within hours that whole town will have same sex orgy piles like the one in South Park that was supposed to get rid of time-traveling immigrants from the future.

  28. Dana

    The dog dead are rising from the dog graves to be judged by dog Christ at the end of dog times.

    1. Captain Button

      Which circle of Dog Hell is the endless “Bad Dog!” level?

      1. Dana

        I’m only familiar with Dog Heaven, where instead of circles they have Frisbees.

        1. Leorale

          All dogs go to heaven! They made several movies about it.

        2. Leorale

          …I mean, people made movies. The dogs probably didn’t.

        3. Captain Button

          Dog movies are all in Smellovision.

        4. CheredisTyping

          You can’t prove dogs didn’t at least help in the making of the movies

        5. Spencer

          How dare you diminish the impact dogs had on cinema.

          They made a movie about that prejudice and everything.

      2. JonasofAtlantis

        Dog hell cosmology:
        Circle 1: Arf? In which the owner is always walking around with a leash but never takes you for a walk.

        Circle 2: Woof, the circle of greater Arf, where no matter how many times you roll on your back no one scratches your belly.

        Circle 3: Yip, where all chihuahuas go. All dogs here are tired, but can’t get to sleep because of the yipping. The most ironic circle.

        Circle 4: Woof, where you catch a car and must spend eternity figuring out what to actually do with it.

        Circle 5: Whine-yip, where that tasty-looking rabbit thing was actually a porcupine, every time.

        Circle 6: Woof, where the last sheep will just never go through the door, and it’s always almost supper time.

        Circle 7: Om nom nom, where dogs who ate too much people food are put on an infinite vegan diet for their ‘health’. The saddest of the hells.

        Circle 8: Grrr, where violent dogs are forced to work out their differences over a poker game, but no one knows how to play or who’s winning because they are dog.

        Circle 9: The silent level, where traitor dogs who don’t obey their alpha or owner are put up for adoption. Such bad dogs.

        1. Gamaran Sepudomyn

          The idea of alphas in canines is completely outdated. As with human politics, a dog may be dominant over a dog who is dominant over a dog that is dominant over the first dog, or weirder structures.

        2. Captain Button

          So we need dog dominance dodecahedrons?

        3. Joey245

          This is just all kinds of fantastic.

        4. Sudden Clarity Clarence

          OK, that’s just brilliant. Now for someone to draw each circle.

    2. Disloyal Subject

      Does that happen beforr or after the Wolftime?

      1. John

        As in, “Wind time, wolf time / ere the world falls”?

        I’m not an expert on pre-millennial dispensationalist theology, but I’m pretty sure they believe that the Rapture occurs just in advance of Ragnarok. Jesus comes and whisks all the good dogs off to Heaven, where they have to watch their owners’ sexual shame reels, and then Fenrir snaps his fetters and all the bad dogs join him in the battle against the gods.

  29. Tekkactus

    Maybe they’ve been raptured!

    1. Captain Button

      “Maybe we’ll get Raptured!”

      ‘And maybe we won’t. Maybe we’ll get ruptured!‘

      – Riders of the Storm aka The American Way (1986)

  30. Jay Eff

    Tomorrow on DOA:

    Joyce learns her parents got a second dog!

    His name is “Nate“.

    1. Captain Button

      I thought that was a snake…

      1. inqntrol

        This one?

  31. detective boomwolf

    So… thats what having a dog can be like?

    Suddenly, I’m glad my cat was so lazy.

    1. Gamaran Sepudomyn

      On the positive side, dogs aren’t likely to give you mind control bacteria when you clean up their poop.

      1. No Name

        Those are protozoa.

        1. Kryss LaBryn

          Oh well then.

  32. Whittier

    This is me every time I visit one of my friends. Good thing his dog is smallish.

  33. Icalasari

    Me reading the comic: DAWW!
    Me reading the Alt Text: Aaaand now I have a sad again

  34. Guairdean

    That’s pretty much how our grandsons would greet us when we’d visit. We’re the “cool” grandparents.

  35. heyman

    The house I grew up in still feels like home, years later. I remember every detail still.
    I went by to look at it after a funeral. The current owner didn’t let me go in the backyard to take a picture. 🙁

  36. Makkabee

    Ah, the unconditional love of a dog.

    1. JonasofAtlantis

      Dog love is conditional on it being fed properly.

      Everything after that is just bonus points, which is why most of them are so happy all the time. They’ve already achieved their life goals by being chubby by canis lupus standards.

  37. andrew

    why do I feel like Mom isn’t home because Becky was coming with them?

    1. CheredisTyping

      Maybe she’s poopin

  38. Lordess of madness

    At least becky seems to be coming to terms with it! Maybe. Or perhaps she’s jealous…

    That dog has really sharp teeth. Piranha teeth.

  39. yakkorex

    Oh. No. I have grave concern.

  40. SomeUnregPunk

    I bet the mother is dead.

    Blonde blames herself and turns into a fundie hulk.

    1. Captain Button

      She said “I would die for you!”

      1. SomeUnregPunk

        Ans she does.
        she dies for her daughter’s old self.
        Her new self is obviously devil spawn now. So she goes now to join her daughter in hell.

  41. OnyxIdol

    Nothing like a dead dog to cheer you up, amirite?

  42. ninja_jesus

    Nice use of warm colors for the trees and sky. That whole first panel is pretty aesthetically pleasing.

  43. Dariu55

    Joyce is easily tackle-able.

  44. andmangrewproud

    “If it takes forever / I will wait for you / for a thousand summers / I will wait for you…”

    1. brionl

      Joycerassic Bark?

    2. StClair

      AUUUGH.

  45. Bagge

    Heh, I like Becky’s gallows humor. “Yeah, that’s how I was a week ago.” Sorry, Becky. You were barking up the wrong tree.

  46. BenRG

    This is only a guess but I think that Snoop is happy to see Joyce again. 🙂

  47. Evergreen

    Time to ogle some new backgrounds!!

  48. brionl

    I’ve got a picture of one of my deceased cats as the wallpaper on my phone.

    I even kept playing World of Warcraft for an extra couple of months because the Stranglethorn Panther my Hunter was using as a pet was the exact same color as the cat.

  49. JonasofAtlantis

    The dog is apparently both a dog and a ninja, making it a more developed character than the mother already.

    I approve of this development. Perhaps it can become Amazigirl’s mentor and be the Batman to her Robin.

    1. Kryss LaBryn

      Or Ace the Bathound? Or I guess Deuce the Amazi-hound or something.

      1. Spencer

        Ace the Bat-Hound is a cherished piece of Batman history and I will fight anyone who says otherwise.

  50. NinjaNick

    Sneaky snoop.

  51. Thebatman22

    Its the one and only D-O-double-G!!!!

  52. Lorien Inksong

    Aw how cute- *reads alt text*
    …Willis may I offer you an internet hug?

  53. DarkoNeko

    Ewww. Ew ew ew !!!

    See, it’s because of that kind of crap I don’t like dogs. Especially the ones that tries to put their paw full of mud on your brand new jeans.

    1. DSL

      You have my pity.

    2. JustCheetoDust

      At least they don't try and eat tampons out of the garbage.

      1. DarkoNeko

        …what

  54. Trolldrool

    I really doubt Carol is dead, else I think we’d see a much different reaction from the dog, even in being happy to see Joyce again. I think it’s far more likely that she’s waiting for them in the living room preparing a list of arguments to defend Toedad’s conviction to the sanctity of his family.

    Unless she’s so unlikable that the dog doesn’t care that she’s on the kitchen floor having a stroke.

    1. Doopyboop

      It’s so awful, but the mental image your comment conjured, of Joyce’s dog happily licking her while her mother twitches and groans in the kitchen made me laugh.

      Really awful, strokes are no joke. Unless intercut with HAPPY DOG THAT DON’T GIVE NO FUCKS.

      1. Trolldrool

        In my experience, there are some jokes that are so horrible, so reprehensible, that the only rational reaction is to cry. And then there are some jokes that are so awful that there IS no rational reaction and the only option left is to laugh.

  55. Willoughby Chase

    Hank looks worried.

  56. BenRG

    Meanwhile, over on http://www.questionablecontent.net, the divorced owner of ‘The Secret Bakery’ has finally had a canon surname given to him: Bean. Because I’m like that, until otherwise show, he is the nice guy that Leslie married under pressure to be hetronormative but later left.

    I am already writing a scene in my head where Becky and Dina are asked to look out for Samantha, her reptile and amphibian fangirl daughter when she’s in Bloomington for a maternal access visit. Just imagine a 14-year-old girl who gives non-venomous snakes or giant frogs as bonding presents to new acquaintances hanging out with the core cast!

    1. David M Willis

      Do you, like, not remember Leo or what?

      1. BenRG

        Remember? I haven’t even HEARD of him before!

        1. DSL

          You just need to start writing your own strips.

        2. Narf

          “Until otherwise shown.”

          Go read Shortpacked! and you will be shown. You don’t even have to read all of it, you meet the guy towards the end.

      2. Captain Button

        Obviously that is the more distant and sinful part of the Bean clan, which is why Sam is being tempted by serpents. We know who likes to dress up as a serpent, right?

    2. Kryss LaBryn

      “her reptile and amphibian fangirl daughter” I had to reread that a few times; for a minute I thought you were claiming that Sam was into some kind of fandoms; but was also, like, a lizard alien or something.

      It makes more sense now. Apparently I need more caffeine.

    3. Spencer

      Leslie’s maiden name was Bean.

      #funkiller

      1. Captain Button

        So Sam is her niece then?

        1. Spencer

          I guess that’s the kid? I haven’t read QC in forever.

          Marten’s mom is dating that guy who was with Dora for five minutes?

        2. Captain Button

          Yes. Dora is with Tai the librarian now, Marten is with Claire the not-a-twin, Faye works in the robot fighting underworld, and Marigold is with Dale despite their fundamental ethnic incompatibility*.

          Pintsize is still creepy.

          * She’s Horde and he’s Alliance.

        3. Spencer

          Right I knew Marten/Claire has been a thing for a while (was that 2014 or 15 that happened? Dale/Marigold was around there too I think. I remember liking that one but I can’t remember if it ever got developed) and I think it was after a while there that I stopped.

        4. a snow mous e

          The big news is that Coffee of Doom is down an employee. Or it was, until Dora hired Cosette and accidentally “hired” Emily.

        5. a snow mous e

          Although I haven’t read QC for a while, so there might be more big news by now.

        6. trlkly

          Yeah, you’re way behind. I assume we’re being cagey to avoid spoilers, so I’ll just say that the big news resolves a significant portion of what you are describing. The comic was completely wordless.

  57. QD

    After the shock of that mostly pleasant ride back, be prepared for whatever Mom is being set up to be doing instead of Being Home to be awful/terrible/very very sad-inducing

    1. BenRG

      If the preview art is any indicator (and it isn’t always), we’re being set up for a fried supper.

      1. thejeff

        But it’s an awful/terrible fried supper.

        1. Captain Button

          But which of them will betray who?

        2. Kryss LaBryn

          The corn will betray the mashed potatoes. It’s always the corn. Man, corn, amirite?

    2. Snowmon89

      Calling it now. The wife is calling an intervention for Becky.

  58. podian

    At least the dog’s name isn’t Daniel 😉

    1. John

      To be consistent with the established Joyce-dog-naming scheme, I’m thinking his name should be “Mousie”.

  59. BenRG

    Y’know, that house must be bigger on the inside than it looks! How did the Browns fit their four kids in there at the same time?

    1. Harvey Janus

      Joyce’s sister and her two brothers in the same room, Joyce in a second, Chinmom and Hank in a third. I’ve been in a similar situation for the past 9 years. 3 bedrooms, 7 people.

      1. tim guegue

        Do Indiana houses have basements? There’s probably at least one bedroom in the basement if they do.

        1. DSL

          I knew a family with seven kids in a house that looked smaller than that. The dad walled off the back half of the attached garage to make a room for the last two boys. I don’t know where/how they housed the two girls produced afterward, though the older kids may have started moving out by then.

  60. altalemur

    adorbs

  61. Deanatay

    Oh, Willis. You could have drawn any house, any dog. You’re the one who dredged up old memories.

    Unless, of course, the five-month delay dredged them up for you. In which case…. I’ve got nothing.

  62. Harvey Janus

    Joyce parked a ways back from that garage door… Is it a garage door or am I stupid?

    1. QWERTY

      It’s a garage door but it might not have enough room for 2 cars or is a work room. She parked away from it so her parents and siblings could still use the walkway and not be blocked in.

  63. TheNinthShader

    Fuck me, that dog is cute.

  64. hof1991

    Details! The look on Hank’s face as he walks into the house. He knows something is wrong and is already worried. Then his hand in panel 3 is in a fist, showing his tension and probable dismay at what is about to happen. Not anger, but preparing for something unpleasant, some new shitstorm that Carol will occasion.

    1. LongDistanceDriver

      Ross is waiting.

      I really hope I’m wrong.

      1. tim guegue

        I doubt he’d get bail very easily, or very cheaply.

      2. Luzahn

        This is my worry as well. No matter how unlikely I just feel like it’s going to happen. Like in a horror movie, where someone thinks they’ve escaped, but the monster is just in the room with them.

        I mean hell, the church could have raised bail money or something. It sounds evil enough to do.

      3. Someone

        Ross is waiting…with a gun to Carola head

        1. Spencer

          “Mom oh my god!”

          “He’s a good Christian man, Joyce, and he’s entitled to his opinions.”

          “He has a gun to your head!”

          “Try to see things from his point of view. He’s just worried about his daughter.”

        2. John

          And then Hank gets to live not vicariously through his daughter!

    2. Russ

      Details in the same panel: Hank has his hand clenched in a fist, and it isn’t an art oversight since Becky’s is relaxed in the same shot. Some one is worried!

      1. merbrat

        I’m thinking happy thoughts, and maybe he just has the car keys in his grip. But, ya know…Willis. Oh, dear.

  65. Renee J

    If Joyce’s mother is setting up an intervention, I can see that as the catalyst for her sibling to come out.

    1. Guairdean Beatha

      I wonder if the conversation would go something like this. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vudJivvHWqI Some of you may remember when Soap originally aired. It was highly controversial, and hysterically funny.

  66. Sigurther

    Puppers make everything better.

  67. Alexx

    Sometimes people warn me like: “Oh, my dog can be a handful, she likes to jump on you.” And then when I get in the door I’m IMMEDIATELY on the ground rolling and laughing with the dog and they’re like “Oh. I see. You’re a dog person.”

    1. 3-I

      That’s rough.

    2. begbert

      Dog-owners always tell me “I don’t believe it, he NEVER growls at people like that! He’s always loving and friendly!” And then I’m like “bullshit, stop lying to yourself, you just saw your animal threaten me.”

      I have a very real phobia of dogs, earned from being attacked by one as a child. I’m pretty sure pedophiles get more sympathy and accommodation.

      1. Marie

        This used to be a tl;dr, but I cut it down because I figured you wouldn’t want to read a bunch of dog stories;

        people can be dicks about fears but nonetheless probably aren’t lying

      2. Heather

        Could you really not with that comparison.

      3. Doopyboop

        I may not have a phobia of dogs, but one time my neighbors’ dog bit me in the face. Got me above the eye, nearly got the eyeball. He wound up only grazing me but I was 8 and I was TERRIFIED. When I went back over I’d hide behind their couch or chair to put furniture between myself and their chow. And…yeah they were all “why are you doing that, he won’t bite you again” “stop being dramatic”.

      4. Tan

        I am similarly phobic, for a similar reason, and what makes it suck all the more is that I used to LOVE dogs before that, and I still kinda do in concept, but being around them, especially first meeting them, is one of the most stressful situations possible for me. Everyone likes to think ‘Oh, but MY dog…’ whatever whatever… I can understand that feeling. They love their dog, they see their dog in the best possible light… But goddamn, I’m just asking you to control the dog, not have the dog put down.

  68. Mo

    Basketball hoop! Because Indiana.

    1. Bicycle Bill

      Basketball hoop!  Because Indiana — and Joyce had 3 brothers….

      OK, question time.  If a person is trans-gender and makes the switch — like Bruce Jenner > Caitlyn — that does not negate everything that had gone on prior to that, correct?  “Bruce Jenner” as a person in the historical record — along with his Olympic records and medals, his television career, and everything else up to 2015 — still exists as a male, right?  So the same should hold true for Joshua Brown > Jocelyne Brown.

      1. Narf

        I’m pretty sure that’s one of those “case-by-case basis” things.

        Like, I’m a cisgender male, but when I was younger, one of my best friends since childhood came out to me as transgender before beginning her transition. Starting then, with the exception of a few accidental slips of the tongue, I called her by her new name and used female pronouns when referring to her, but otherwise, everything else just felt like being with my friend. From that point on, she changed a lot. Really, it was like the identity she wanted was slowly becoming hers, and it was inspiring to watch.

        However – and I want to stress that this is my perspective, not hers (I don’t actually know how she feels about this today) – this new identity was so different (and not because of the clothes, hair, makeup or new name, either) that it felt like knowing two individuals, one male and one female. I had memories of this male individual with a particular name, whom I called by that name in those memories, so I felt it made sense to ME to use the name I knew back then when I was referring to things that happened back then.

        Like I said, I don’t know how she feels about this today – we don’t speak anymore – but I know that mentions of her life before her transition were at least in the first few years following it very uncomfortable for her. She’d laugh nervously or make a joke and quickly change the subject.

        I guess I’d have to say that I feel there’s merit in the idea of using the name of the person the world knew at the time in the same way there’s merit in the idea of using the name of person that I knew at that time, because it fits my memories. I’d also have to say that I don’t presume to know how this kind of perception would feel for a trans* person, and that my first priority would be to respecting someone’s personal wishes on the matter.

      2. thejeff

        I’ve been told, and told pretty strongly at that, that it’s offensive to dead name anyone, even when referring to before they were out. Consider that in many cases they thought of themselves that way long before they transitioned or were even open to anyone else about it.
        Obviously people may differ and you should reflect someone’s wishes once you know them.
        Joyce’s sister is Jocelyne, she’s just pretending to be Joshua. That she’s not actually out yet makes it more complicated as it’s not safe to refer to her correctly. Even if you know, you wouldn’t want to risk outing her. Of course, that’s in world. Out of world, it’s Jocelyne. A strong hint that this is preferred is that as soon as the secret was revealed to us, Willis changed all the tags to refer to Jocelyne. Even those before we knew, when she was posing as Joshua.

      3. 3-I

        Everything thejeff said. But in addition, it seems like halfway through your comment, you decided you already knew the answer. So speaking as a trans person… No. When someone tells you they are trans and gives you their new name and pronouns, there is NEVER any reason to look at their accomplishments- the ones made by the person still standing right there, asking you to use the right name for them- and attribute them to a dead name and incorrect gender.

        I don’t even care if Caitlyn Jenner says otherwise. She’s said a LOT of transphobic shit. Also, homophobic and racist shit. Rule of thumb: When someone comes out as trans, they are not becoming a different person, and all their achievements are still THEIR achievements. So you use their new name and pronouns.

  69. Marie

    Maybe Snoop saw the opportunity and ate Carol

  70. Sock_v

    Just hoping there’s not an intervention waiting in the living room for Becks.

    1. Marie

      I’m at the point where I could believe or hope Hank would let her leave.

      But then it might turn into an ‘all three of you’ intervention.

    2. hof1991

      From the previews, it looks like a sustained intervention with Carol calling in all her sons to help “adjust” Joyce and bring her back to Christ. That won’t go the way she thinks it will.

      1. Lord Stoneheart

        Maybe they’re just visiting home because it was possible and they want to see their little sister again? (Holds onto false hope)

    3. Luzahn

      Aw man, I really hope so. We know they’re not gonna break either of these two, so that just mean we get to see them be awesome and defy the jerks.

  71. trlkly

    Wait. Is the title text about the old comic? (I’d assumed it was an autobiographical thing). Is Willis breaking his own rules. Naughty, naughty.

    1. trlkly

      (In case you’re wondering, while the older comics look good, I decided to stop reading them as my brain was blending them together and getting me confused. I’m still not sure whether certain things happened in one comic or the other.)

    2. showler

      The alt-text? That’s a reference to Willis’ childhood home and pet.

  72. 2K

    ains! It´s cute!

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