207

Who are you?
Posted on August 13, 2019 by David M Willis

207 thoughts on “Who are you?”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    So capes have a way of making everyone look identical in silhouette, is that what we’re learning

    1. Ana Chronistic

      I mean, heck, Walky barely looks like he can breathe HERE

      1. Tacos

        Having a diet consisting of mostly McNugs probably doesn’t help either.

        1. Clif

          I’m less surprised he was unable to get down than I am surprised he was able to get up there in the first place.

        2. Shen Hibiki

          As many cats could tell you, climbing up is the easy part in this situation XD

  2. ValdVin

    Whose D&MM jammy bottoms are those?

    1. ValdVin

      …and are those Star Wars shower shoes?

      1. ValdVin

        …and a blue bathsheet towel?

      2. Bicycle Bill

        I was trying to see what was written on those, but I don’t think they’re shower shoes.  They look more like bedroom slippers.

        1. ValdVin

          Ah, the Hubert Farnsworth look.

        2. Ed Rhodes

          “Now THAT’S a name I haven’t heard in a long time… a long time!”

        3. Clif

          Or maybe Phillo after the capacitor accident.

  3. Nono

    Ah, so Joyce and Walky have matching pants.

    1. NerdHerder

      If you told her that, she’d combust from being caught between her warring impulses of fundie modesty and the urge to rip off her pants because there’s no way in H-E-double-hockey-sticks that she’s going to match Walky.

      1. Diner Kinetic

        Nothing willis could pen has the potential to make me happier.

        Except a Lawsome reboot with newly updated visuals and dynamic bonus strips

      2. Delicious Taffy

        So, thinking about Walky in Dexter jammies makes Joyce want to rip her pants off, eh?

      3. Seregiel

        According to Sarah she is both remarkably quick (particularly changing) and somehow able to appear by shear force of will. She’d quickly sweep her left arm upwards and new pants would be on by the end of the motion.

    2. Reltzik

      You mean Joyce and NIGHTGUY have matching pants.

      ….. I think Nightguy is really Joyce. I mean, we haven’t seen them in the same place, have we?

      1. MaddMaxx

        I mean if we’re being honest, Nightguy could be anyone

        But my money’s on Carla

        1. King Daniel

          You sure that’s not Spider-Car?

        2. Marsh Maryrose

          Are you nuts? It’s obviously Lucy.

        3. Plasma Mongoose

          Well if it is Carla, then subverting expectations by making her superhero persona dorkier than the civilian one, which could help with the whole secret identity thing.

        4. Yet_One_More_Idiot

          Y’know, if I’d had to pick someone to riff on Amazigirl by making up their own dorky parody of a superhero, I’d’ve pretty much put money on Faz being the one.

          The Faz would’ve called his superhero identity “The Fazinator”, because as everybody knows, the Faz is so…Fazinating.

          😀

    3. Walky_Talky

      Bold of you to assume they don’t share the pants.

      1. Needfuldoer

        There’s only one pair of D&MM pajama bottoms left in wardrobe; the rest have all been ruined with coffee and Nachito stains.

  4. Cheshrin

    Walky.

    Walky.

    My dude.

    What the fuck are you doing.

    1. Deathjavu

      Look, he just needs to live up to the title of this comic like everyone else.

      …and avoid studying for midterms.

    2. Danielle

      i dont think that will ever be answered

    3. Techhead

      Where’s Walky? I only see Amazi-Girl and Nightguy.

      1. Marsh Maryrose

        Amazi-Girl is tagged. NightGuy? Not so much.

        1. Bicycle Bill

          Amazi-Girl gets tagged when she is speaking in blue speech bubbles.  NightGuy hasn’t developed a colored speech bubble yet.

        2. Minim

          Not quite – we’ve seen Amber use blue bubbles and vice versa. The way to tell is Amber has blushed cheeks, AG does not (which is the case here) /pedantry

    4. Zatar

      Art. That’s what he’s doing.

      1. Clif

        Performance art requires performance.

        1. Yet_One_More_Idiot

          You can’t spell “performance art” without “fart”. FACT. 😛

          Think about it, you know it makes sense. xD

    5. ReFlex76

      Trying to get laid.

      It’s always about trying to get laid.

  5. AntJ

    WALKY NO

    1. AntJ

      although… he DOES have a lot of pent-up anger about the past, and has found punching people to be cathartic

      1. Cholma

        Why does everyone keep calling him, “Walky”? He’s *clearly* NIGHTGUY™.

        1. Marsh Maryrose

          Yeah, Willis really screwed up with the tags.

        2. Rectilinear Propagation

          Not according to the tags…does this mean this won’t last long?

      2. Doctor_Who

        I REALLY don’t think this particular coping method is one that should be catching on.

        1. AntJ

          The pajama pants and blanket cape are to make him look ridiculous. This probably isn’t serious, it just gives Walky some credit for his anger and maybe helps AG see how bad her brand looks on someone else.

          Plus, Walky threw one punch and bruised his knuckles.

    2. Keulen

      WALKY YES

      1. Yet_One_More_Idiot

        WALKY MAYBE?

  6. ScarletSabre

    Walky already knows the most important skill for a Willis superhero… being able to say your name like a logo

    1. Kamino Neko

      EVERY superhero can do that. It’s the second most common superpower.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Fortunately for Walky, Amazigirl has the most common superpower.

        1. Clif

          The ability to look awesome while wearing a completely ridiculous costume?

        2. Yet_One_More_Idiot

          No, that’s the *third* most common superpower, I believe. 🙂

        3. He Who Abides

          I believe the first most common superpower is a sports bra.

  7. Mada

    Wat

  8. Mr. Random

    Nah

  9. Stephen Bierce

    I’ll be your (k)night in shining armour
    Riding to your Emotional Rescue
    You will be mine you will be mine–all mine!

    1. Needfuldoer

      Ah, the Stones’ prog/disco phase… Weird times.

    2. Deanatay

      Who who? Who who?

      I really wanna know

  10. not someone else

    Oh my fucking god Walky

    Where did you even get yellow and purple… Head Alien? Pajama pants?

    1. He Who Abides

      The same place Joyce did, I bet.

      1. Clif

        Out of Joyce’s closet?

        1. He Who Abides

          Other same place.

  11. Mra

    Recognized immediately

    1. JessWitt

      He should wear a wig, like Batwoman.

      1. Mra

        Or supergirl

        1. JessWitt

          He’ll wear all the wigs as a costume so he can be Nightwig instead.

        2. Charlie Spencer

          DC’s lawyers are holding on line 3.

  12. Thores

    Where’s the Nightguy tag

    1. King Daniel

      Or the Dexter tag

  13. General Tekno

    There’s “in over his head.”

    And then there’s “At the bottom of the Mariana Trench.”

    Which is where Walky is.

    1. He Who Abides

      Can it be both?

  14. vile_gamer

    I always suspected something like this would happen, but that was four or five years ago, and Willis has taken me on a wild ride since. There are no surprises, just sinister Mr. Burns’ “Excelleeeeent” moments

  15. CMasta

    Walky failed so hard at the alter-ego Nightguy didn’t even get a tag.

    Tragic.

  16. BBCC

    Good lord, I think I busted a rib laughing.

    1. Clif

      Yeah, you would think there would be a warning, read at you own risk, disclaimer or something.

  17. Kyrik Michalowski

    Walky you are so far out of your depth that we can’t even find you right now. How can this possibly end well?

  18. Deadjolras

    Does anybody else think this so-called Nightguy looks like Sal?

    1. Reltzik

      Yeah. Further evidence that it’s Joyce, who’s been slowly borrowing bits and pieces of Sal’s look.

    2. thejeff

      Don’t be ridiculous. It’s obviously Reginald, Duke of Thingley.

      1. He Who Abides

        Don’t be daft, it’s obviously Ninja Rick.

  19. Skater Girl

    I am not sure if this is better or worse than my prediction of a set-up.

  20. butts

    he’s… wearing the dexter sweats

  21. Lacuna

    YEEEEESSSSSS

    BE THE SEXY ROBIN TO HER SEXY BATMAN

  22. purblebirb

    Fighter of the Dayguy

    aaa-AAAAAAAAA-AHHHH

  23. King Daniel

    I eagerly await the no-doubt-coming-soon Nightguy vs. Duke of Thingley battle.

    1. Keulen

      You mean the Duke of Thingley isn’t Nightguy’s mild-mannered alter ego?

      1. King Daniel

        Ridiculous. Next thing you’ll be telling me is that that flaky Peter kid from Queens is actually Spider-Man.

        1. He Who Abides

          Oh please. Everyone knows that Ben Reilly is the real Spider-Man.

          Until he isn’t.

  24. Architex

    Ahah Haha Haha this is better than anything I thought was going on

    1. JessWitt

      After the evil parent drama and relationship roller coaster, it was well needed.

  25. Rabid Rabbit

    Confirmed: Walky has no clue that Amber and Amazi-Girl aren’t actually the same person.

    And now someone’s actually going to have this demonstrated to them.

    I can’t wait for A-G’s “What do you MEAN this meat vehicle has made out with YOU??? That is WAY out of line for the sharing rules.”

    1. Sporky

      I thought it was established he already knew though? I don’t know, this comic updates once a day so I can’t remember any details like that.

      1. King Daniel

        The only character I can name off the top of my head who currently has any clue that Amber and Amazi-Girl aren’t the same (as in, Amber has straight-up told him, and they’ve talked about it a time or two) is Danny.

        1. DailyBrad

          Yeah, I don’t think she even told Dorothy or Ethan it’s a different aspect of her, exactly. Danny is the only one she’s made the distinction to.

        2. Nono

          I think Dina has some idea, even if she doesn’t get the full nuances of it.

        3. AntJ

          I wouldn’t be surprised if someone asked Dina and she was like “oh you didn’t notice?”

        4. Needfuldoer

          That sometimes happens when communication is a deliberate process you have to put effort into, instead of it just coming naturally. (Seriously it’s like a superpower that people take for granted.)

        5. Seregiel

          Pretty sure she also told Dorothy and Sal about the compartmentalizing parts of herself. Dorothy after stabby mcstabface and the monster bit. Sal similarly saying she wasn’t Amazigirl at the moment.

        6. thejeff

          She’s said things that were clear to people who already knew (like us), but they’re not really more than weird cryptic hints if you don’t already understand.
          Danny’s the only one who’s gotten more than that and I’m not sure how much he really gets it.

      2. BarerMender

        He know they’re the same person. What he doesn’t know is THEY’RE NOT THE SAME PERSON.

    2. thejeff

      Yup. All the jokes about Nightguy’s costume aside, this bit is likely to bring a lot of weirdness into sharp relief.
      Amazi-Girl met up with Walky on the roof a few times (before it was Garbage Roof), but that was all back when they were still sharing memories. She hasn’t seen him since and thus likely has no clue that he’s made out with Amber or that he knows her secret identity.

  26. Tacos

    Amazi-Girl is not amused.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Wait until his sidekick Evening Guy shows up.

      1. ktbear

        Wait until HER sidekick, Sal, shows up.

  27. C.T Phipps

    Maybe this will help Amazi-Girl realize she doesn’t need the mask of Amber.

  28. abysswatcher1993

    Walky: “I am the nig-”
    Batman: “You are adorable.”
    Darkwing Duck: “Kidd, this isn’t a game.”
    Jaune Arc/The Hunter: “This city is too small for more than one masked vigilante.”
    Ren Amamiya: “I think I am in the wrong city.”
    Punisher: “Get off, masked clowns!”
    Billy Butcher: “I heard there were many supes in the area, so I came to get rid of them.”
    Eric Cartman/The C##n: “Oh c’mon! I can’t have a cinematic universe with so many of you!”
    The Tick: “See Arthur, this is what happens when vigilantes get weapons and lose their sense of identity.”

    1. MatthewTheLucky

      I don’t know why you’re calling Jaune a hero. He’s a total dork, and the only hero around the academy is Hunts-Man.

      1. King Daniel

        Hunts-Man is a stylish avenger, sure, but does his sidekick, Wonder-Zwei, not count? And what about that new hero that Wonder-Zwei’s been seen with recently…whassername, Red Huntress?

        1. abysswatcher1993

          The Red Huntress is considered a villainess by the Hunts-man, but she doesnt mind as long as they are close.

  29. Dara

    panel four amazigirl is my patronus.

  30. Keulen

    I did not expect this at all, but I love it! Now Amazi-Girl can have a sidekick.

    1. Kamino Neko

      She already has one. Nightman’s sister, Cool Girl.

      She just has to convince HER of that.

    2. Deathjavu

      Yeah, just what she needed: an idiot with all the fighting skills of a kitten and a similar kitten-like ability to get stuck atop tall (ok, not even tall, like medium-sized) objects.

  31. DailyBrad

    This is fucking adorable.

  32. JessWitt

    Hahaha, the best outcome.

    Also we can see his sclerae now!

  33. Robert

    “Night Monkey, over here!”

  34. Synnerman

    Aw, Walky looks like an C-Class hero that escaped from One Punch Man.

    He’s going to die horribly. Or rather… get beaten up isn’t he?

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Mumen Rider could kick Nightguy’s back-passage.

  35. Toad

    ARE WHO NOW Y–

  36. Joe Moose

    Walky.

    I mean, Nightguy.

    WHY!?!

  37. PB

    Oh thank God it’s not Blaine.

  38. newllend(henryvolt)

    First off none of this is a good idea, second “Nightguy?” How about take more than 5 minutes to come up with a name.

    1. Marsh Maryrose

      Okay, I’ll bite. What’s your superhero name? Take ten minutes if you need it.

      1. Marsh Maryrose

        It took me ten minutes, but for now I’m going with Klaxon.

        1. ValdVin

          Harpo Marx wants his alter name back.

        2. Marsh Maryrose

          He’ll have to arm-wrestle me for it.

          And yes, I know he’ll have some fake arms to try to fool me, but I am Klaxon, and villains should flee when they hear the sound of my name.

        3. ValdVin

          Kudos for the most Tick-like statement I’ve heard in a long time.

      2. Delicious Taffy

        As previously established, my superhero name would definitely be Mindress. That or Spider-Crab.

      3. Clif

        Hmm. That’s an interesting challenge, Marsh. It would have to be something that no-one would ever associate with me.

        Maybe, WonderKliph! (TM).

        Though of course the leading w would always mean getting stuck towards the back of the superhero line.

      4. newllend(henryvolt)

        Id

        1. newllend(henryvolt)

          Was trying to reply but posted by mistake, anyway I always had the “The ghost of justice” but that always felt like more of a title than a proper name. Kind of like how Wonder Woman is the “Spirit of Truth”.

      5. daredaemon

        Datalink

    2. Bicycle Bill

      My alter ego is “Sprocketman” — https://transportation.stanford.edu/sites/default/files/2016-06/sprocketman-comicbook%201975.pdf

  39. chris2315

    I don’t get it, why does the tag say Walky? I don’t see Walky anywhere, only Nightguy.

    1. 3oranges

      You need to look harder. The first panel has two silhouettes, the smaller of which looks a great deal like Walky.

  40. Juanoku

    And now we only need
    BIKE WOMAN
    or something like that

    1. Needfuldoer

      Would that be Meredith’s superhero persona?

  41. Bagge

    …Walky hasn’t quite twigged to the fact that he’s dating Amber, not Amazi-girl, has he?

  42. inqntrol

    “Nightwing wants to know your location.”

  43. EvilMidnightLurker

    Oh god it’s becoming a fad. Do you want Watchmen? Because THIS IS HOW YOU GET WATCHMEN.

  44. Bagge

    Billie walks by, glimpses “Nightguy”

    “MOTHEREFFER, I KNEW SAL WAS A SUPERHERO.”

  45. NinjaNick

    Nightguy? That’s cute.

  46. Needfuldoer

    Why is he wearing spats? Did he steal them from Mr. Peanut? (Or are those socks and slippers?)

    1. JessWitt

      They look like socks and slippers with some writing on them and I can’t wait to know what they say.

      1. Needfuldoer

        Looks like “STAR WARS”.

        1. JessWitt

          Aha. Thanks

      2. King Daniel

        They read “Star Wars”, if you look closely. At least the visible one does.

  47. Kitschensyngk

    I am the butt taco that flaps in the night!

    Also acknowledging the Parks and Rec reference in the first panel there.

    1. Needfuldoer

      *farts in the night!

      1. ValdVin

        He is wearing a cape, so “flaps” is applicable after tacos, isn’t it?

        1. Needfuldoer

          How do you think the cape flaps when it’s not windy?

  48. BenRG

    Well, Willis deserves a kudos for coming up with something that I never even imagined him doing.

    Poor Amazi-Girl! Amber’s boyfriend looks like he’s going to have a headache or two named after him! IMO, the next thing she should say is: “You literally haven’t thought this through beyond ‘I want to support my girlfriend’, have you?” Either that or she’s going to think it’s a sort of cute in the form of: “Oh, look at the silly puppy-dog that can’t stand up!”

    1. thejeff

      Does Amazi-Girl even know that he’s Amber’s boyfriend? That’s where this is going to get weird fast.

      1. BenRG

        She should, she tried to take over when they were both walking down from Garbage Roof.

        1. thejeff

          Maybe, though that might have just been caused by Amber’s panic reaction to Sal with Amazi-Girl knowing nothing more than that.

  49. Bryy

    Batman and Robin are gonna bone hard.

  50. AGV

    Walky, I don’t think that this is the kind of roleplaying that Amber said was into

    1. Delicious Taffy

      For one thing, I don’t see a single d8 anywhere.

      1. thejeff

        She might have a pouch of d4s to use as caltrops.

        1. Clif

          Point. Or maybe points. Those d4s are dangerous.

  51. Rognik

    Walky’s in this comic? I only see Nightguy.

  52. ADLegend21

    When your GF’s alter-ego is SO done with you.

  53. Piotr W

    … I feel stupid, but only after the second reading I realized that Nightguy is actually Walky…

    1. BenRG

      The mask works!

  54. Eve

    ……Walky you are a wet noodle in this universe. A nugget eating noodle.

    1. BenRG

      I think that sucker-punching Asher gave him a false sense of confidence in his fighting abilities.

  55. BenRG

    Here’s a prediction as to where this may go: Asher goes looking for the ‘masked nuisance’ and thinks that it is ‘Nightguy’ who he recognises as Walky. There follows a comedy of errors where Asher stalks Walky and Amazi-Girl is able to act basically with impunity.

  56. Solenoid

    Walky. What. Why. What.

    1. BenRG

      It’s sweet! He wants to support his girlfriend! He hasn’t the first clue what is involved in this course of action, of course, and I’m sure that Amazi-Girl will be willing to tell him just how out of his depth he is already (if he hasn’t already realised that with the whole ‘Oh god, I’m up so high!’ thing). However, it’s a sweet gesture! 🙂

      1. Deadjolras

        Walky: pure of heart, dumb of ass.

  57. kilgaen

    He has had a taste of violence, and now his hunger can no longer be sated.

  58. AbelUndercity

    It’s a good start, Walky, but you really need some head protection if you’re going for that whole Irving Forbush look.

    1. AbelUndercity

      Gravatar seems determined to genderflip me.

  59. AbelUndercity

    Fudge it. I’m keeping this one.

  60. Crumplepunch

    The tags spoiled his secret identity.

    1. BenRG

      It’s good enough for Tony Stark so it’s good enough for Walky!

  61. Ron

    Glad to see that Leslie K. got some recognition.

  62. EvilMidnightLurker

    For one brief shocking moment, I thought that was Machete.

    1. Clif

      Me too.

  63. Aviana

    Here’s my concern, actually – are AG and Amber sharing memories again? Last I knew, they weren’t. If they’re not, what happens when Walky inevitably goes to talk to Amber about whatever conversation is to follow this?

    I say concern, but I wouldn’t complain about the dissociation being forced out into the open in conversation.

    1. thejeff

      Or even more quickly, when Walky brings up something AG doesn’t know about – like them making out or just calls her Amber or something.

  64. Rabisch

    It will surely bring huge problems. But I think it’s sweet how Walky wants to help the girl he likes by becoming the sidekick of her second personality, who probably don’t like him.

    1. thejeff

      Last time they met AG and Walky got along pretty well. That was awhile back though, while Amber and AG were still sharing memory.

  65. Morrison

    Gya ha ha Leslie Knope

  66. Willoughby Chase

    Wearing his Fighting Jim Jams!!!

  67. Willoughby Chase

    Where are the Amazigirl Facepalms when you need them?

  68. Shane

    I kind of like the angle “does it look grown up and awesome when I do it? No? Huh. Well maybe you’re faring better, but who knows.”

  69. 1 2 2 50 in Roman numerals

    Okay so is anyone gonna ask y walky owns a shirt that just says “night” on it or

    1. Matt

      Because he is vengeance. He is the night.

      1. Clif

        Also he is turned where you can’t see the K. Of course the Duke of Thingley is a knight.

  70. ziggy78eog

    Is this the start of Amazigirl, Inc.?

  71. BenRG

    It occurs to me that the trope is that comedy sidekicks are usually dead meat.

    1. Clif

      So what you are saying is that Walky has a head start?

  72. raccoonrebels

    I legit thought it was Faz, and this was the beginning of some complex false flag plot by Blaine

  73. TheFlamingonator

    Is this supposed to be a Batman/Robin dynamic or Iron Man/Tom Holland!Spider-man dynamic?

    1. Tan

      I’m feeling it’s more like Spiderman/Deadpool dynamic (with, uh… Less guns and ultraviolence on Deadpool-Walky’s part)

      1. TheFlamingonator

        Maybe a Peter Burrito Parker/ Miles Morales (Spiderverse) dynamic? the mentor/mentee part not the father figure part

  74. Jasmijn

    He gets the font and everything!

  75. HeatherJean

    So, no chance of it being a dream, huh? Post-orgasmic for either of them, or just another weird one for Joyce?

    (Nice touch having WalkyNightguy’s hair be especially mussed as part of the disguise, btw, just like AG. Nowif he could only get the voice right….)

  76. Micki

    LOVE the Leslie E. Knope Library. Two of my favorite piece of media existing in the same universe — confirmed. LOL

  77. UncolaMan

    “I’m Dark Knight!”
    “Taken”
    “Night Mask.”
    “Taken”
    “Night Man.”
    “Taken”
    “Night… Guy.”
    “Okay, you’re clear.”

    1. OBBWG

      “Nightwalker?”
      “Taken”
      “NightWalky!”
      “Umm…”

  78. nlips

    But…. Amber isn’t sharing Amazigirl’s memories anymore.

    This could get…weird.

    Amber genuinely won’t know who NightGuy is.

  79. Jhon

    Amazi-Girl, take him gently by the hand, and push him off.

  80. Paper Gangster

    Like a real-world Pajama Sam.

  81. Victor Riley

    Is this a sex thing? This is probably a sex thing.

    Walky is more imaginative than Danny, at least.

    1. DailyBrad

      Eh, I dunno about that, but I am also not sure if the grappling hook sex was Amazi-Girl’s idea or his.

  82. Sarpiedon

    I’m a little disappointed that it’s not Machete.
    Would have gone perfectly with the storyline in It’s Walky $100 Theater.

  83. hinoron

    “Well, ‘Nightguy’… I recommend you walk to the end of the concrete wall nearest the top of the stairs, where said wall is only about two feet high, and step off. If that’s too complicated for you, perhaps costumed vigilantism is not the path for you.”

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