166

Sponsor
Posted on July 26, 2015 by David M Willis

166 thoughts on “Sponsor”

  1. Jen Aside

    Galasso does not disappoint! =D

    …although Galasso used “I”… strange o_O

    1. Dammy

      Galasso is the fifth-hottest man on the poll, so put your sass back in the sass safe.

      1. darkoneko

        Some prefers them bald eh.

      2. Ozzi

        The drooling masses do not rank over sass. So to use your phraseology “put your ass back into the drooling idiot safe.”

    2. Michael Steamweed

      Galasso uses the first-person pronoun in a deliberate attempt to blend in with the human masses!

      1. motorfirebox

        Deliberate… and successful! Because Galasso is always successful!

        …I!

    3. Björn

      Well, he said “I’m”. He probably just wanted to show Dina that HE knows how to use contractions.

    4. Pat Myers

      I think he used it because he becomes anxious if his proclamations would not fit neatly in word balloons. He is a strange and mighty leader.

  2. timemonkey

    Dina and Galasso, a thing of beauty.

    1. Michael Steamweed

      An upcoming Slipshine???

      I would totally read that!

      I would totally pay for that!

      I would totally cosplay that! 🙂

      1. Jen Aside

        I just read the first part of A Centaur’s Life, and I feel like it’d be just like that…

        “What are these parts?”
        “Do you not have a daughter? How have you not seen this?”
        “Galasso does not remember. It was a trifling thing.”

      2. Chaucer59

        Yeah I can see it now, Dina, flushed, exhausted: “I have been blowing on it for several minutes, and I still see no sign of arousal. Are you certain this is the preferred form of foreplay?”

        Galasso lifts his face from the floor, teeth full of carpet fibers. “Truly, these modern sexual fads leave much to be desired.”

        1. Robin

          So what is Dina blowing here?

        2. Jordan

          Thanks for that. I nearly choked on my gum laughing.

        3. Michael Steamweed

          I was drinking coffee. “Was” being the operative term. 😛

      3. LiaHansen

        this is it. this is the worst slipshine suggestion ever. there have been a lot, all bad, but this is the worst

        1. dethtoll

          I know, that’s why it’s the funniest.

        2. AgentKeen

          No no, it doesn’t involve Faz. The worst slipshine suggestion would involve Faz.

        3. Inlaa

          Faz and Galasso.

        4. Strife

          You have to see bigger.

          Faz & Mary

          THAT would be ultimate slipshine horror B)

        5. Sterling

          Mary and Blaine.

          … FAZ and Blaine.

      4. darkoneko

        Ew what ? He’s like Dina’s father’s age.

    2. aroree

      Oh great. Thanks. I ship them now. Like I needed THAT in my head…..oh well. I”ve shipped weirder.

  3. otusasio451

    Galasso and Dina. The socially unaware vibes are off the scale!

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Galasso is practically dinosaur-sized.

      1. John

        Dinosaurs come in all sizes! Including Galasso-sized!

      2. Whittier

        Galassosaurus. Sounds legit.

      3. DarkVeghetta

        Nice pick, Plasma. I titled that picture “Sarah J. Wizard” (as in Jessica Rabbit 😛 ) when I acquired it for myself. A fine choice indeed.

    2. Wack'd

      It’s such a natural comedic pairing that I’m surprised it’s taken this long, honestly. Even considering Dina’s long period of being dead in the other universe they’ve had like five years to hang out on this side of the line.

  4. shadowcell

    no dina, don’t make eye contact, or else you’ll end up working at his toy store

    1. tim gueguen

      You are confusing the true Galasso with the false Galasso. The true Galasso knows pizza (and subs) is a far more effective tool of world conquest than things desired by geeks.

      1. Tunaro

        So would the quickest path to world domination would be through pizza (and sub) geeks then?

      2. Someone

        Now if both Galasso’s were to meet each other, would they team up or battle?

        1. Tunaro

          They would coalesce and become Super Galasso, having power far surpassing either Galasso had as individuals.

        2. LiaHansen

          but not before doing a marx brothers mirror bit

        3. Bicycle Bill

          They would become Synergystic Galasso, where the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.

        4. Drunken Nordmann

          Both. That’s how these villain team-up usually go.

      3. shadowcell

        Galasso, like other great mayhem-minded fellows like Megatron and the Joker, has an extremely diverse portfolio of plans to further his domination of the world

      4. AgentKeen

        That’s what McAwesome’s had over Shortpacked!, it didn’t have food! Clearly they needed a food court with pizza (and subs).

      5. Jordan

        You’re under the misconception that geeks and nerds don’t like pizza (and subs), when in fact, they’re more likely to spend money on those then they are on toys. Unless they’re Ethan.

  5. Lapin

    As a fellow short person, I feel you Dina.

  6. Mind Fuck

    Galasso Agrees

  7. Plasma Mongoose

    Does this mean that Galasso know even less about sexuality than even Dina?… CRIKEY!

    1. Doctor_Who

      We still don’t know how Conquest happened.

      Conquest the person, not Conquest the inevitable-result-of-Galasso’s-campaign-to-rule-the-world. We know how that happens and it’s a result of really good pizza (and subs).

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        I doubt even HE know how Conquest happened.

      2. JetstreamGW

        I’ve kinda always run with the assumption that Conquest is adopted and Galasso just has no idea how biological lineage works.

        1. Doctor_Who

          I kind of like that idea, because it suggests to me that she was already named Conquest, and that he chose her based entirely on that criteria. Sure, he wants a male heir, but there’s no way Galasso could ever not take a baby named Conquest home with him.

          Besides, there weren’t any kids named “Invetible demise of All Who Would Oppose Me”.

        2. nightsbridge

          He wanted a male heir and thought he got one, and was only disabused of the notion when he got home and Pamela said ‘what a cute little girl.’

        3. Wack'd

          Possibly disconfirmed by this, at least as far as the Walkyverse is concerned, though Galasso also believes you can conquer the world with a toy store, so the phrase “I do not believe this was the case” may have been a deliberate out.

        4. JetstreamGW

          ‘xactly. He never actually says he had a ladyfriend.

          That said I seem to remember some kind of flashback where Connie had a mommy so I could be wrong about that.

    2. John

      Dina is at least aware of the difference between female and the other one. Ones?

  8. Doctor_Who

    Seriously, is Galasso about seven feet tall or what? I recall him in SP always being taller than Ethan, who towers over most of this comic’s cast.

    1. Tunaro

      Galasso is as tall as he needs to be to look down on all the peons surrounding him.

      1. Twinkle Toes the Berserker

        This comment makes he wish for a like/upvote function.

      2. Tacos

        Or to put it another way, “FOOLS! Galasso can be any size he wants!”

      3. Jordan

        Sounds like he’s Gamagori from Kill la Kill.

    2. timemonkey

      Most of the cast is short.

    3. Wack'd

      Everyone Willis draws is either six feet high or four feet short.

  9. Tunaro

    Don’t worry Galasso, I am reasonably certain it perplexes everybody to some degree. At least, I certainly hope so.

    1. MeghanTheWorldEater

      Nope not even a little perplexed. And you can’t disprove that cause it’s not like there’s record of me saying something like “I’m not quite sure where I fall on the kinsey scale” a couple days ago. So suck it 😛

      1. Rabid Rabbit

        Your avatar is particularly well-suited to this comment. (And yes, I know who she is.)

        1. Disloyal Subject

          True, but I’m gonna miss the old one.

      2. darkoneko

        Kyaaa an Evelyne avatar !

  10. Catullus

    I’m pleased to see that Galasso’s obliviousness about human sexuality is a multiversal constant.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Even I know it involves Slots and Pegs somehow.

      1. Lucina

        No, pegging is a discussion for another day.

    2. MM

      Aww, I hope that somewhere there’s a place he finally gets it.

      1. Wack'd

        Hey, the multiverse is infinite, so at least one of him should be okay.

        1. Tunaro

          That would be Anti-Galasso, a pansexual philanthropist with hair like flowing water. We do not speak of him. Except to explain that we do not speak of him.

      2. John

        He got it at least once. Conquest didn’t come out of a cloning vat.

        … probably.

        1. drs

          Suddenly I thought of Jenny, the Doctor’s Daughter.

        2. Deanatay

          Yess! Why didn’t they do more with her! I HOPE they do more with her!!

  11. Mr. Random

    Nice to know Ethan’s helping Galasso already.

  12. Someone

    Hmm maybe a questioning individuals meeting isn’t the best place for Galasso to start. I mean he can barely figure out gender, how is he gonna handle sexual preference?

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      He will naturally choose the one that allows him to take over the pizza(and sub) industries of the world(assuming he ever figures it out that is).

      1. Someone

        well the obvious answer would be pansexual then, you need somewhere to put the pizzas.

      2. nightsbridge

        Pizza industries, and then the world*

        fixed

        1. Deanatay

          (and subs)

    2. Rycan

      But if anyone there is questioning, it’s Galasso. Galasso is questioning everything about human sex, gender, sexuality, etc. – and wishes to know how it may be used to further his plans of world conquest.

  13. Captain Batson

    Galasso’s hair looks less “widow’s peak”y than usual. I assume this is unintentional.

    1. Wack'd

      It’s the shadow from his magnificent hat creating the illusion of a hairline.

  14. Sionyx

    Here when I saw Gelasso’s sponsoring it I was thinking Connie had something to do with it.

  15. Twinkle Toes the Berserker

    OMG Galasso has the gays or bisexuals!

    Just curious, would this be a group where genderqueer/trans/other non binary genders would be welcome?

    1. Someone

      Jim said its was for everybody…so yes

    2. Leorale

      Pretty much a certainty. I think chill nonjudgmental people who specify that they welcome “anywhere along or outside the sexual spectrum” will welcome folks along/outside the gender spectrum, too.

      1. Kamino Neko

        I wouldn’t be so sure about that. ‘Chill, nonjudgemental people’ can get pretty uptight and judgy when you don’t conform to the gender binary.

  16. Leorale

    Today’s comic is my new favourite thing.

    1. JessWitt

      Indubitably!

  17. Jen

    I have always loved Galasso’s confusion regarding gender and sexuality, particularly because he has a wife and a kid. Seeing a comic of his backstory would be fascinating. 🙂

  18. newllend(henryvolt)

    I bet Beckys here too

    1. Someone

      Yes, but only for the pizza.

      1. MeghanTheWorldEater

        She’s questioning if she likes pizza or boobies more.

        1. Someone

          I’m not really sure either

        2. Tunaro

          Why not have both?

        3. Plasma Mongoose

          Hot pizza + boobs = burnt tits

        4. Disloyal Subject

          Solution: leftover pizza. Best with pepperoni.
          Combine with boobs for the best of mornings.

        5. gkheyf

          Get on it, Dominos!

    2. Leorale

      Joyce said Becky was taking care of other stuff instead. (Maybe looking for work or something.)

      1. MeghanTheWorldEater

        Unless Joyce lied..

        1. Heavensrun

          “other stuff” is sufficiently vague that I don’t think you -can- be lying when you say “X is taking care of….other stuff”.

        2. MeghanTheWorldEater

          Yes but Dina asked if Becky wanted to come or not. I have a suspicion she didn’t even mention it to Becky at all so as not to out Ethan.
          So she probably doesn’t know if Becky wanted to or not, and I would consider not copping up to that a lie.
          Not that I blame her. I’d probably do the same.
          Hmm, maybe Joyce didn’t do any of that and I’m just projecting.

      2. nightsbridge

        i still think she’s off to buy more clothes.

  19. Bri

    Agender Aromantic Galasso?

    1. Wack'd

      Well, he’s probably not aromantic, what with the wife and kid and all. Demiromantic, maybe?

      I feel kinda weird labeling him. The social context necessary for those terms to have meaning don’t compute for Galasso, why should he use them?

      1. David M Willis

        GALASSO CANNOT BE CONTAINED BY YOUR WORDS, MORTALS

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      Aromatic? Galasso is bound to smell like pizzas.

      1. A Scientist

        Aromatic? I hope his pizzas don’t smell like benzene!

      2. A Scientist

        Galasso broke the third person! Oh dear!

        Also, because Galasso has decreed he is only here to serve and not to learn, even though he decreed it in such a way as to convey a cover-up of his own perplexedness (it’s a word, darn it), I am bound to believe him.

        1. A Scientist

          This is not where this comment was supposed to be. My computer freaked out, and I became confused.

          Oh well, as you were.

  20. Archivist

    DoA Galasso has resorted to…sneaking?

  21. zmm

    I missed him.

    and I fraking love the Dina centric.. I’m so glad this’ll continue over my birthday

  22. Stephen R. Bierce

    *plays Foreigner’s “I Wanna Know What Love Is” (live version) on the Muzak*

    1. Deanatay

      Noice!

  23. The Thing

    Tell me about it, Gallaso. I go to sleep and 100 new sexual orientations spring up on the Tumblrwebs.

    1. Kole

      You… DO realize that tumblr didn’t invent any of those orientations…. right? ………………………….right???

      1. Captain Batson

        Yeah, but can we please pretend they invented “otherkin”? Please?

      2. Mr. Random

        I feel like some of them are legitimate, and some are people just trying to feel more unique, or to help define who they think they are.
        It depends though.

        1. The Thing

          Without objective standards, anything can be considered ‘legitimate’.

          Because I totes feel like I was an attack helicopter in a past life!

        2. Deanatay

          Transformi-sexual?

        3. Andrusi

          Legitimacy aside, I’m pretty sure “was an attack helicopter in a past life” isn’t an orientation at all and has nothing to do with anything.

        4. Heavensrun

          That does sound kinda badass, tho.

      3. The Thing

        When I go down the rabbit hole, sometimes I begin to wonder – were they invented, or were they lost cousins to the Great Old Ones, waiting to be found by men who wanted to know too much?

  24. Dean

    I’m kind of curious how everyone is so keen to eat pizza right after breakfast.

    1. David M Willis

      The time posted on the wall for this meet is 1-3pm. Earlier in this timeline Amazi-Girl said Dina had slept in.

      Dina had cereal for lunch. Now she’s having pizza.

      1. gkheyf

        In college, 1-3 is immediately after breakfast. But I think that’s the perfect time for a pizza dessert!

        1. darkoneko

          It’s ALWAYS the perfect time for pizza

          (it’s also always the perfect time for cereals)

      2. Heavensrun

        Even if that wasn’t all true, (and pretty attentively set-up, BTW), Dean, have you ever -been- to college? People will come to anything at any time if there’s free pizza.

      3. Dean

        David Willis acknowledged my existence in order to correct me. I am gratified, yet shamed.

  25. Kole

    “What if Gallasso was [something other than cishet]”

    “PFF no only CISHETS get married and have CHILDREN!!”

    ahh, the internet.

  26. Idon'tcarenomore

    I do remember Conquest. How could I not?

    But I do not remember her mother? Did Galasso’s partner ever get introduced to us? Or mentioned?

    1. Catullus

      Galasso has a wife named Pamela. In DoA, she’s only appeared in a single panel. In Shortpacked!, she died at some point before the comic’s beginning; however, an alternate-universe Pamela did play an important role in one story arc.

      1. Deanatay

        Galazzo: “FOOLS! They do not understand my GENIUS! Soon, I shall RULE THE WORLD with the POWER of MY PIZZA AL-”
        Pamela: *clears throat loudly*
        Galazzo: *GRUMBLE* “… (and subs) ALONE!!”
        Conquest: “Seriously, Daddy, product diversity is better for our bottom line!”
        Galazzo: “… fools…”

  27. Pierre-Eric

    #smallpeopleproblems

  28. BenRG

    Galasso doesn’t change much between realities, does he?

  29. Lulu

    And I wanted to see gay Galasso…

    1. nightsbridge

      How can someone be gay, when their gender is called ‘Overlord?’

      1. Shadlyn

        When they have a same-sex Underlord, obviously!

        1. Jason

          But if the gender is “Overlord”, the other person must also be “Overlord”. Which means they would be “Overlord Underlord”, or possibly “Underlord the Overlord”.

        2. darkoneko

          There’s a diet biscuit brand named Gayelord. That’d work.

  30. Shadow12000

    I keep reading Galasso’s lines in Gru’s voice.

    1. Bicycle Bill

      Perfect!!!

  31. Edupoet81

    I’m 5’1, so I get where Dina is coming from in that last panel.

    Dina is eating something other than cereal! Is she questioning her food preferences?

    Dina has no idea just how much Galasso has to learn. While she’s trying to make eye contact, he’s tryingto determine if Dina is a male or the other one.

    1. Deanatay

      Admittedly, she hasn’t acutally EATEN it, yet. She may just be taking a slice out of politeness – as far as she can tell, everyone seems to be there for it. It may be rude not to take a slice. She may wind up taking it back to Amber. Then again, she is displaying her tongue in a distinctly non-saurian display of culinary anticipation.

      Willis is continuing the theme of easily-distracted-Dina. From breakfast, to stalking the wily Raicob, to free gay pizza. To who-knows-where next? I get the impression this whole chapter may be Dina getting distractedly sucked into one interesting event after another, each one a growth experience for her.

      1. Darkoneko

        That expression in panel 1 gives little doubt to the fact she oes, in fact, enjoy pizza.

    2. Nono

      Dina’s eaten pizza before. Remember when the gang was at Galasso’s?

      1. Edupoet81

        Right, I forgot about that! I just went back to that chapter, and I found a comic where Dina not only ate pizza, but apparently sprouted fangs to eat it.
        So, it seems that Dina does not live on cereal alone all the time — only most of the time.

        1. Tenn

          Dina is the anti-Willy Wonka.

  32. Bill A

    Dina has fast become my favorite character.

    1. Opus the Poet

      Dina is everybody’s favorite character, only a few won’t admit it to themselves.

  33. Cerberus

    Aww, Galasso is trying to understand human sexuality in an appropriately Galasso fashion and I like that he’s trying on the “harder” end of the spectrum that will give him a more accurate picture rather than trying to default to an easier normative narrative on what sexuality is supposed to be like. It shows he genuinely wants to learn and wants to learn correctly so that he can apply this knowledge to how his pizza can better conquer the world!!!

    On a side note, I totally feel Galasso on this. I remember when I was utterly perplexed on human sexuality (albeit for different, more asexual reasons) stuff going on around me and having to just dive in where I could to research what it was all about. It can be difficult at first when you don’t really have a ledge to first grab onto.

    * I also want to imagine the great Galasso trying to learn about gender and by accuracy being shunted away from the bad assumptions. “GALASSO was told that the male ones have the one set of genitalia and the other one has the other, but then the girl on the roller skates said that wasn’t the case and besides there may be more than one other one. Galasso must eavesdrop more to overcome this weakness that could be exploited by my enemies.”

    1. li

      I also liked this a lot. X3 It was just… cute. And considering it was just one line, I liked it especially for how neatly it elevated his comical sometimes-mentioned confusion from SP!

      like, this line? Made me feel for him a little. Instead of just loudly announcing he can’t tell the difference between the “two (or more???)” genders, we’ve got him now trying to learn stuff. …idk, it’s just humanizing in a place I wasn’t expecting it, and appreciated.

      1. Brady Kj

        I think Galasso heard this is a group for people who have questions about sexuality, and assumes the students around him have the exact same questions he has. He has no idea there is a spectrum with a harder end or an easier end.
        He’s probably expecting a student to ask “How do you tell a male and a female apart?” and Jim to give a clear, simple answer. Perhaps he could get a sheet of words like “Sex” and “vagina” and their definitions.

  34. Pat Myers

    I always liked how in Shortpacked!, Galasso’s problems with Conquest were that her mother assigned a gender to her at birth, even though Galasso would never have had a problem with her being his heir otherwise. I was kind of expecting Ultra Car to point out to him that he was misgendering his daughter as “not an heir” when she kept telling him she was an heir.

    Anyways, always ask for pronouns, Galasso. Can’t go wrong with that.

    1. Nightsbridge

      ‘Mortals’ and ‘peons’ are always appropriate.

  35. Heavensrun

    OH. MY. GODS. I want….I want to hug Galasso.

    I want to hug -Galasso-.

    WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME, WILLIS?

    1. Jordan

      He’s given you human feelings you silly lion.

  36. brumagem

    Dina and Galasso are kindred spirits. There could have been a non-creepy ship if Galasso was a history TA or summin’.

    1. Tilly The Hun

      Replying because you read my mind. New favorite ship! she’s legal, its all good!

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      Having Galasso as a TA would make it MORE questionable not less in the same way that Jason/Sal has a moral dodgyness to their sexual relationship.

  37. Tenn

    I wonder if “asexual” is even enough to describe Galasso’s orientation.

    1. Gear

      Anti-sexual?

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      aphasexual: the inability (or impaired ability) to understand sex.

  38. Bagge

    A cat may look at a king.

    A triceratops may look at an emperor, but only his nostrils.

  39. Rodimiss

    …I forgot how much I absolutely, dearly love Galasso. I am now sufficiently reminded. I love Galasso.

  40. Micah

    I doubt you’ll ever read this, but I just wanted to say that these dina strips and related ones have been some of the best in the past year or so. keep up the great humor!

  41. Roborat

    Ah Galasso, the only man who can speak in brackets.

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